Everyone Ships Twilight

by Spring Showers

Rating: teen
Tags: Romance, Shining Armor, Equestria Girls, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Velvet, Human, Night Light, Main 6, Comedy
Length: 12968

Sci-twi decides to come out to her family about having a girlfriend. Trouble is they all already know, but none of them guessed the right girl.

Sci-twi has decided to come out to her family about her sexual preference and the fact that she is already dating one of her friends. The only problem for her is that, much to her embarrassment and confusion, everybody already knows and has shipped her with somebody else in their head! From her mother shipping her with everyone's favorite animal lover to Celestia betting two purple haired girls to great together. Twilight learns the hard way that not only does everybody ship, but everybody apparently ships her.

I'm rating it teen and putting the sex warning. I doubt I'll get much more than VERY inappropriate and suggestive but I rather be safe than sorry. If the urge strikes me, I may 'expand' on the more or less mini mini stories that I am using to pad out full chapters into actual chapters themselves or may expand beyond those I have planned currently that are 'shipping Twilight'. It will depend upon how popular this gets and how much interest I get in it, I suppose.

To be clear, this will take place Post-Friendship Games.

And yes, I do know it's probably a bit on the non-sense side, but the kind of comedy I love and love to write often does push that. So I hope you enjoy.

Published 2016-04-14 22:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-04-22 22:12:16 UTC

Her parents and brother

Twilight Sparkle usually found some degree of solace or comfort in science. Charts, graphs, measurements, math and science didn’t lie. Sure her blind reliance on science nearly destroyed Canterlot High AND all the girls that were now her friends but that was beside the point. Instead all science was giving her was a massive case of anxiety as she saw her family staring at her with her notes, prepared speech, and even several of her graphs falling off the presentation board to the floor. It was like the presentation of her nightmares! If it weren’t for how she was in fact dressed with her tie snug at the collar of her shirt, it would be a dead ringer for such.

Her dad sat there with a raised eyebrow at the panicked look on his daughter’s face while her mother seemed to be just waiting for her to get to the point after nearly an hour of random blathering with figures and diagrams that still didn’t seem to add up to any real point. Neither parent knew what to make of their daughter in this state. Her mother consoled herself with scratching Spike on his stomach. Her family had taken the talking dog rather well. Made it easier to know when he needed to be let out. Shining Armor stood nearby obviously impatient as the rest, but did his best to smile supportively and patiently.

Twilight Sparkle had no idea what to do! She knew her expression had to show it as she started to play a little with one of her curly bangs, feeling as if somehow a huge spotlight was on her. She didn’t know what to do or say! Finally, some part of her that seemed perhaps smarter than the rest connected with her mouth and got it out. “I’m gay and I’ve secretly been dating Rainbow Dash!” She winced a little and offered a shaky smile at her family. Everything seemed so silent as she counted in her head. Each slow tick of the clock chiming as she waited for the big explosion. It never happened.

Her whole family seemed almost under-whelmed. Night Light, her father, looking at the charts and his daughter. He opened his mouth as if about to say something before closing, thinking better of it. Her brother merely tapped his arm as if still waiting for the bomb to drop. Her mother, Twilight Velvet, though seemed to get at least part of what her daughter expected and gasped! “O-Oh my! Twilight! We-oh! You…oh my, we never knew…oh my this is so surprising…” her tone was clearly placating though and a look from the men of the family stopped her as she rolled her eyes, “Really, sweetie? That’s what you had us sitting here for an hour while you talked about birth rate ratios and politics?”

Twilight saw the absolutely underwhelmed look on all of her family’s face with Spike pointing out, “Told you they probably already knew.” Her family all nodded in silent agreement with Spike, “Starting to wonder why I even talk when you still don’t listen,” his tone though was more teasing than anything else as he smirked. He was enjoying the tummy scratch her mother was giving him, tail wagging in obvious delight.

Twilight asked a bit meekly how long they’d known. Her dad answered quite flatly, “When you were ten and seemed so giddy that Moon Dancer had given you a Valentines Card and gushed that you were going to get married. Didn’t know about Rainbow Dash, I thought it was Applejack.”

“Applejack? Really? With our sweet smart Twilight?” Her mother questioned as if shocked at her father’s assumption. “I mean I knew about Rainbow Dash when you mentioned popping by to watch her practice recently, and all of the different colored hairs I’ve found while doing laundry. But I still never would have thought you’d go for the more jock type of girl. I would have sworn you and that Fluttershy girl would have made the cutest couple.”

Twilight Sparkle’s mouth couldn’t have gone any wider less her entire jaw dislocated and her face became elastic. But Shining Armor sure pushed it as he added, “Yeah, my money was on Pinkie Pie. I mean cute nerd and the party girl. Opposites attract, am I right?” His dad nodded, apparently seeing what his son meant.

“Wait wait wait!” Twilight finally managed to find her voice as she stammered that one word at her family. “Wait! So not only did you all know I was gay,” she paused for emphasis. Her family nodded between each other, “But you were shipping me with everyone EXCEPT my actual girlfriend?” She felt a mixture of relieved and mortified. “What made any of you even think me and the others besides Rainbow Dash would…you know, be like that?” Twilight almost immediately regretted asking that question.

Shining Armor at least cut in first, but what he said didn’t make this any better, “Someone DID figure it’d be Rainbow Dash…Vice Principal Luna. Cadence matched you and Sunset Shimmer and Principal Celestia pegged Rarity…speaking of, I owe Luna twenty bucks.” Twilight gestured a little upset at her brother for not only pairing her wrong but for BETTING on it!

Her mother thankfully frowned, “Now Shining Armor, it’s one thing to make a guess at your sister’s girlfriend and another to make a wager on it.” Twilight felt relieved at least her brother was being properly admonished for something. Even if he did think she was dating Pinkie Pie of all people. “As far as what made me think it was Fluttershy, until I found those hairs, it always seemed so sweet and romantic in my head.” Her mother began.

Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy both were rather socially awkward girls. One preferring the company of animals while the other had books and science, in addition to an animal they both adored. Fluttershy helped at the shelter grooming people’s pets and primping the animals there in the hopes of adoption every other Saturday. Twilight had started taking Spike there and each weekend they’d enjoy the peace away from anyone else besides each other and the animals. Their hands might touch now and again in brief embarrassing touches as they worked together on Spike. They’d get a little soap and shampoo on each other and laugh together. Chatting away about whatever topic might come to fill the silence.

Nothing would really happen at first, but one time Fluttershy deciding to be a bit more playful would wipe a bit of soap on Twilight’s nose and give the sweetest most charming giggle. Spike would merely quietly watch on with a knowing expression as Twilight returns the gesture wiping her hand against Fluttershy’s jaw, stroking a little against her face. Their touches growing more and more intimate with one another. No one around to disturb them in their little paradise except the gentle contented noise of the animals surrounding them as at last both girls felt their defenses lower and move towards one another in a brief chaste yet loving kiss…

“No offense, but next time you start talking about Twilight in your slash fanfiction, would you mind leaving me out of it?” Spike questioned up at Twilight Velvet from her lap even as the woman giggled, gently lowering the dog to the ground where he’d move to stand beside Twilight who looked at her mother almost too embarrassed to think of what to say next. “Earth to Twilight? You okay in there?” Spike questioned up at her as she stood there seemingly lost in her own head.

Her mother went on for a little longer about how cute she imagined the two of them together, only making Twilight even more uncomfortable. It sounded more like some sweet sparkly girl-girl anime. Father and son exchanged brief looks and quiet gestures over how sappy and overly mushy mom’s story was. She was almost hoping the catastrophic odds were in her favor and she was just hit with a meteor right then to end her embarrassed suffering.

Her mom finally finished, with her dad finally clearing his throat to get some attention. “As sweet and darling as your idea is, it’s clear given Twilight is dating Rainbow Dash that she’s not as interested in a cute wallflower like herself.” Twilight was thankful at her dad’s acknowledgement of that, but all too quickly he ruined it, “I mean we both know neither of them would ever have the courage to make a first move. It would be the friend zone to end all friend zones…that’s why I suspected Applejack. She’d probably charm the pants right off of her…just an expression sweetie, not saying anything about your love life that I don’t want any details on,” he insisted firmly! She loved her dad but he could go overboard just as badly as her mom. Probably worse.

It was likely just any old day on the farm. Applejack had invited Twilight over to meet the ‘Apple Clan’ more intimately. Probably be some mild confusion given the whole ‘other Twilight’ thing but that was hardly the big topic. No, what mattered was Applejack had gotten Twilight to come out with her at all to the vast orchard her family worked to see it for herself. Her sister, Apple Bloom, keeping Spike out of the way for the farm girl to invite her out and let her watch her work.

Twilight watching on fascinatedly as Applejack would kick or shake a tree to loosen the apples free. Flaunting her athletic prowess as she’d catch them with all the precision of a juggler. Twilight would get to watch her friend’s muscles flex and tense as she showed off to impress her. Showing a strength rivaled only by that brother of hers, with him thankfully too far out to risk showing her up. Eventually Twilight, being the helpful well-meaning girl she was, would ask to try.

She’d of course fall flat on her butt but Applejack would help her back up and gently coax her. Like someone helping teach their partner a golf swing or how to throw out the ball while bowling with an arm on hers, front to her back. Applejack would get to enjoy gently touching Twilight’s leg as she helped the girl get a weak yet solid kick. Time would go on and the two would be sweaty from a day’s work. Applejack would invite her back to the house to wash up.

The two arrived and entered the bathroom. Twilight was about to strip only for Applejack grab her and press her up against the cool tile of the shower. Smirking at her winsomely, she held her tightly as the shower steam surrounded them. Their clothes grew drenched, “Ya’ know, Sugarcube, a bit of free labor ain’t the only reason ah called you out here.”

Shining Armor had fallen over laughing while Twilight Sparkle and Twilight Velvet both saw the man of the house look at them both as if he knew he were somehow in trouble. “Really? Not only was that the WORST country accent I ever heard, that sounds like the plot to a bad porn movie…and about your own daughter no less,” Her glaring mother insisted. “At least I kept mine family appropriate.”

Twilight Sparkle face palmed and groaned into her hand in only growing shame over her family and their failure to realize how bad they all were. “Maybe, but I got my point across. Twilight would need someone stronger to balance out her more…sweet nerdiness,” he insisted. “And someone who’d make the first move, and Applejack fits the bill of a girl I think would be honest and up front.” He crossed his arms as if this were some silly argument even as he huffed. Her parents both chuckled, showing there at least was some humor in it for them, though it was lost on the subject of ridicule.

“And what exactly is your excuse, Shining? I’d think my brother would know better than to pair me with the loudest most unscientific girl at school. I tried once to discover how she appears and disappears and my lab equipment almost blew up on me,” she pointed out to her brother as if somehow that alone invalidated any theory on how she or Pinkie Pie would get together.

Shining merely grinned, looking to get his breathing under control. “I get that, I really do, Twilie, just-aha-aha, just hear me out,” he pleaded as he stood there. “I mean truth be told, that’s part of why I think you two would make such a great couple. Like dad said, balancing each other out. We all know you need to learn how to cut loose a little more,” he pointed out. Her parents begrudgingly nodded as if somehow seeing the logic. Not that Twilight could argue on that point either.

“He’s got you there, Twilight,” Spike pointed out, choosing to rub salt in the wound just a little. The way he smiled helped put her at least a little at ease. “Take it away then, Shining Armor, I’ve gotta hear how you explain Twilight and Pinkie Pie getting together. Though like your mom said, can we stick to the PG version?” He gestured with a paw at twilight velvet. Everyone of course looked at Night Light next as if to further taunt him for that before Shining Armor began.

Twilight spent almost all her time either at the library, at some lab doing work, or with her small group of friends in a group. She literally almost never got out. Anybody with half a brain could see Twilight needed a bit more fun in her life. Luckily she had somebody who did; and would go to any lengths she could to help her see it. Everyone’s favorite party girl; Pinkemina Diane Pie.

Twilight was not a social butterfly. But if her friends were there, she hadn’t thought anything of showing up to just one of Pinkie’s random parties. But almost ten minutes into the party she found the loud music and noisy guests to be more than she could handle. Everyone dancing wildly and excitedly while she hung out near the wall. Even Spike was having the time of his life. It wasn’t as if Twilight could help herself.

Even if her fellow Crystal Preppers, back at the eponymous academy, had loosened up at such an event, it just wasn’t really the place for her. She couldn’t bring herself to just cut and run though after all of Pinkie’s hard work. But in the end that was what it came to as she finally chose to excuse herself. It wasn’t as if she was socializing much to begin with. She’d only barely make it out the door though when she was ambushed by a certain cotton candy colored girl. “Hi Twilight! Enjoying the party?” She’d ask in that oh so sweet ‘I just have to know or I’m gonna blow up’ tone.

Twilight would reach to rub at her neck nervously as she peered at the door behind her, “Well…” she saw that hopeful look in Pinkie’s eyes. A part of her so dearly wanted to just make her smile by saying yes. But she didn’t have it in her to go through with a lie like that. Not just for the party but lying to the cute girl who clearly cared enough to catch her like this. “Not really…sorry. I mean, everyone seems to be having a lot of fun but this really just doesn’t feel like the place for me.”

She’d half expect some explosive happy go lucky insistence that she wasn’t giving it a chance or looking at it the right way. But she HAD looked at it almost every perceivable way possible. From a chance to study her peers in a social setting to social economics to every other sciencey way she could think of to make it fun for herself. But she’d failed. She similarly failed to predict what Pinkie would say, “Oh…I’m sorry to hear that.”

Twilight would look to see the pink party girl looking almost deflated upon hearing that. Rubbing one arm sadly as she nods, “It’s okay, really Twilight. I understand. It’s just not really the place for you. Should have figured, really. I just…really hoped maybe this time I’d get it right.” Pinkie Pie would nod, “It’s okay, really. Here,” she’d reach into her hair and pull out Twilight’s laptop. How she got it was a question she wouldn’t want the answer to, “I brought this. I kind of had a feeling it might go like this.”

Twilight couldn’t really help it. Even if she could, she wouldn’t. Pinkie was her friend, and no matter how much her actions showed she did understand, Twilight couldn’t leave it when SHE didn’t understand. “What exactly was it that you hoped you’d get right?” A direct and to the heart of the matter question.

“I just…wanted to find out what it takes to make you smile,” Pinkie admitted. Twilight started to try and answer insisting that being around her friends was all that she needed, but Pinkie continued to explain, “Not like that. I mean…a smile just for me. Just because I know that perfect way to brighten up your day and make you happy. I don’t know what it is about you, but your smile…getting to see you smile just for me. I guess that’s what I wanted. I like you, Twilight. Probably more than I should…I’ll get out of your way. I have a party to run after all.” She started to walk passed her.

Twilight would stop her though, not letting her dumbstruck state over the confession stop her from acting. She’d nearly drop her laptop in her confused state, “You…like me? I mean…me. Boring, nerdy, awkward, confusing, weak little me? I mean just…why me?”

Pinkie of course smiled at Twilight. Emboldened perhaps more than her line of questioning should have made her. “Because you’re smart. You’re driven and totally laser focused. You’re already so amazing and everything you try so hard at just makes you even more amazing-er,” she paused. Twilight briefly corrected her that that wasn’t proper grammar, or a real word. “See what I mean!” She announced excitedly, “But you also seem really lonely sometimes. Even if we’re all friends now, I see it. I notice when you’re not around…more than anyone else. I notice when you’re not there.

“I like you, Twilight. More than all the quintuple decker super mega fudge mondo swirl ice cream sundaes topped with mountains of whipped cream, chocolate frosting, sprinkles and cherries than I could eat in my whole entire life. Being around you makes me happier than I really know how to say…so, I guess maybe the best way I can do it is by not saying it.” Twilight already expected the pink girl to burst into song or something, already wincing over it. But instead there was no song. No big flashy dance. No cancan dress.

She kissed her. Pinkie Pie flat out kissed her on the mouth. It was a soft yet lingering kiss with the pink girl smiling, “I really do need to get back to the party, but…I’ll see you around hopefully. Pleasedon’thatemeforstealingakiss,” she rambled off the last sentence as though it were one word before rushing back into the party. Twilight was left standing there, touching her lips; still warm with the rather over sweet taste of Pinkie’s mouth on hers lingering as a small smile formed.

Twilight Sparkle didn’t think it was possible to be anymore embarrassed. She really was starting to think she could go numb to it. Then her brother came out with that. Her parents both seemed thoughtful over it, as if somehow they bought the story! “First off, Pinkie Pie and I are JUST good friends! Same with Fluttershy and Applejack and all of them EXCEPT Rainbow Dash! Secondly, what makes you think Pinkie Pie’s mouth tastes SWEET? Let alone that it would be stuck to my lips? And lastly what does that have to do with me needing to ‘cut loose’?”

“Her diet consists of ice cream, sugar, candy, and cake. Believe that answers the first two questions,” he pointed out. Her mother offered a slight wince at her daughter as if in apology. Her brother evidently winning out on THAT point of the argument. He was about to answer the last one when a rather nice aria started to play seemingly out of nowhere. It took little time to recognize it was Dean Cadence’s voice coming from Shining’s cell phone. “Uh, let me get that,” he quickly answered it with a sheepish blush across his face. “What? Really? You’re where-?” The Doorbell rang.

Twilight didn’t even need to answer it to know who it was. Not only from the way her brother reacted to the call with an obviously personalized ringtone, but just how today was shaping up. Today seemed almost perfectly geared towards humiliating her and since her family already had their turns, it was obvious what was next.

Author's Note

So, as I mentioned, I know this definitely pushes alot into silly nonsense but this is supposed to be more silly than anything else. The only person who should be taking it seriously really is Twilight, hehe. Anyways, if you liked it, comment, if you didn't, I also invite you to comment and tell me what you didn't like. I know I could definitely use a beta or proof reader/editor or whatever you wanna call it.

The Faculty

Twilight didn’t even need to answer it to know who was at the door. Her brother’s reaction to the call notwithstanding; it was clear just how today was already shaping up. Today was determined to humiliate her worse than she knew possible. Her family had their turns and as she opened the door she didn’t even think before saying, “Principal Celestia, Vice Principal Luna, Dean Cadence, nice to see you, come in, come in.” Her face bore a painful grimace much to the faculty members concern and confusion.

The three of them together was a little of surprise but Twilight had almost come to believe some of Pinkie’s ‘pinkie sense’ had triggered in her for a moment. Principal Celestia merely did her best to smile as she made her way into the main living area where she’d find the numerous charts and graphs on the floor where Twilight had left them. “Night Light, Twilight Velvet, it’s wonderful to finally meet you in person. I’m Principal Celestia, and this is Vice Principal Luna, my sister. You already know Dean Cadence.”

With the introductions out of the way, Twilight was beginning to wonder why they actually showed up in the first place. Sure the universe seemed to be conspiring to humiliate her, though now that she thought about it, it was patently ridiculous. They had to have some real tangible reason to come here and Luna did not disappoint. “Normally, we’d wait to meet you until the next parent teacher conference. But given the… circumstances around your daughter’s admittance to CHS, we felt it be more prudent to come by sooner rather than later. Now that Twilight seems to have comfortably settled in at CHS. I am deeply sorry if this is an inconvenience to you.” Her parents waved her off comfortably insisting it was no trouble.

Twilight was starting to feel really silly now. Of course it was just a parent-teacher conference. She couldn’t help but give a small laugh to herself, however nervous it came across to the adults present. As if they’d really just show up to humiliate her by sharing stories of her dating her friends! Though of course her brother just HAD to push it. Right there in front of everyone he pulled out a 20 and tried to discreetly hand it to Luna. Twilight Velvet of course regarded her son disapprovingly. He was still in trouble for the bet in the first place. Twilight saw the look of realization and muttered quietly, “Oh no.”

“This is about the wager, isn’t it? I told you not to bet against Luna,” Principal Celestia seemed to almost gloat. “As soon as she asked if we wanted to make that little game more ‘interesting’, I knew it was a sucker’s bet, Shining Armor.” She looked so smug even as Shining Armor pointed out she thought it was Rarity that Twilight would wind up dating. “I never said that, Shining. My exact words were, ‘I think Twilight Sparkle and Rarity would make a cute couple.’ I did however, have a rather entertaining scenario worked out in my head for it though…”

Before she could get started, Spike spoke up. Nobody really gave it a second though beyond how he cleared his throat to get the attention first, “Before you start, Principal Celestia, just wanna say that while everyone IS sharing these stories, we’re hoping to keep them PG. PG-13 at the worst, if that’s cool.” Principal Celestia knew about Spike and how he could talk. She never seemed to question it. But as he said that everyone would see her face turn as pink as some of her hair.

“If you would all excuse me for a moment while I use your restroom and compose myself? He he,” Twilight didn’t even know Principal Celestia COULD look nervous or anxious. But there she was, excusing herself and opening the first door she could to step inside. She even closed it before her mother announced the bathroom’s actual position. “Right, I knew that, um…be right back!” she ran upstairs.

Luna rolled her eyes. “Please excuse my sister’s behavior on that. As much as it might not be my place to mention,” she began, “She is a bit of a pervert. I have heard only too many of her ‘ideas’ of ‘cute’ couples and the sordid details she conjures up between them. Simply be glad she did not think of pairing you with your own brother, Twilight Sparkle. Incest is a taboo she finds especially delightful to ponder its violation.”

Night Light though pointed out, “She’s like that, and yet she’s somehow still principal?” Her father was obviously rather concerned over that revelation. Realistically so Twilight felt now that she knew about this apparently hidden side to Principal Celestia.

“Yes, for I assure you it’s little more dangerous than an adolescent writing horrible fanfiction. She is quite good at her job and devoted to ensuring everyone at CHS receives open communication and understanding while they are under our tutelage. While she may be a pervert, she is hardly anything requiring warning our neighbors about…believe me, I checked.” Luna finished off in an even and firm tone that it took everyone a few moments to realize, at least on the last part, she was joking.

Dean Cadence who had been quite silent smiled, “I can vouch for her. Principal Celestia may be a little… devious in her pairing choices, and some of the content she dreams up between them. But it’s all in good fun, like a joke. Still, I am surprised that it really IS Rainbow Dash. I really did think it was Sunset Shimmer.”

Twilight had hoped the conversation would continue on Principal Celestia. She had almost been begging the universe that seemed out to get her right now that it would. But no. Twilight knew that if she tried to run, her parents would just drag her back there for being rude to their guests so she stood silent as Cadence started. “Principal Luna’s told me more or less about some certain similarities between you two…”

“Are you really certain you want my help.” Twilight Sparkle questioned at Sunset Shimmer with apprehension. It was hard for her to truly contain her excitement but after all the trouble and harm she caused; it was hard to feel as if she truly earned any forgiveness. Least of all the level of trust Sunset was showing her by allowing her to make use of her lab with her.

Sunset offered her a reassuring smile, “I’m sure, Twilight…” her tone steady yet gentle. The two were standing alone in the lab. The other girls had since left to go about their own activities allowing the two former ravagers of Canterlot High time to connect alone. Twilight was about to respond and ask for the fifth time that same question she just answered, “You’re one of the three smartest people I know, and certainly the smartest on this side. So come on. It was your idea to test me, so let’s get started.”

Twilight nodded shakily at her even as Sunset Shimmer sat on the table with the little electrodes stuck to her skin. “I know it was, just I’m starting to second guess if I should really be toying with magic like this again. I mean the last time I tried this, it ended with me turning into Midnight Sparkle. I nearly tore apart this entire dimension because I let myself feel like there was no other way...” She hung her head even as she turned on the equipment.

Sunset Shimmer laughed, “That was pretty bad,” she admitted though as she saw Twilight Sparkle’s anxiety she shook her head. “Twilight, I was only kidding. Really. Trust me. If there’s anyone who knows what it’s like to feel like there’s no other way, it’s me. You do remember what I told you about someone once extending their friendship to me…”

Twilight nodded. She’d heard some of this story but hadn’t been given the full details. She had always assumed it was a matter that Sunset Shimmer simply preferred not to think about, or keep in the past. “I’ll admit, you had me beat in terms of destructiveness. But I’m the one who brought the magic here in the first place, because I believed power was all I really needed to fill that hole inside. Just like you filled it with science and discovery.”

“But I really do LOVE science,” Twilight insisted. Not so offended as shocked at the insinuation, “I love getting to perform research and take notes. I can’t get enough of testing and reducing readings down to core baselines and calibrating my equipment! Speaking of, perhaps if we found a way to calibrate the portal from our side, we could find a way to visit your twilight! Or maybe even find other worlds with magic and-“ she stopped, looking rather sheepish. “I was rambling, wasn’t I? I’m Sorry. You were saying?” She tried to divert the topic back to what Sunset Shimmer was trying to discuss.

Sunset though just smiled, “Nothing to be sorry about…it’s cute the way you seem so excited.” She confessed coolly. “But all I was saying is that I understand what it’s like to be alone. Even when I finally made my friends, I couldn’t quite let go of the guilt that I had over what I’d done. It took a lot before I finally realized I needed to forgive myself for the mistakes I made. You just need to learn to forgive yourself too… and one of the best ways to do that is spending time with friends who care about you. So let’s get started using me as a labrat.” she tried hard to put the last statement as seriously as possible.

Neither girl could take it seriously though as they started to laugh. Her words though had helped the science-obsessed Twilight to relax. Though perhaps it was a little too much as Sunset Shimmer found the girl examining her rather intimately. Her hands touching her to hold her steady as she looked inside her ears and inside her mouth. “Despite of you telling me you’re some interdimensional unicorn pony, it’s still kind of hard for me to believe. I mean physically you’re as human as I am.” she pointed out.

“Well believe it or not, it’s the truth. It’s how I was able to access the magic in the crown and unleash equestrian magic. I think there’s some gland or something in my head that allows me to access Equestrian magic when I have catalyst, like the crown or the sirens I told you about with their necklaces.” The science experiment went on like that, but it was enough for the two smartest girls at Canterlot High.

Sunset’s comment on how cute Twilight was when she was nerding out not forgotten as she noticed Sunset’s eyes, lingering on her whenever she was examining some promising results.

Even more embarrassing was how Sunset didn’t seem to react to knowing SHE knew she was watching her. It made Twilight blush quite a bit as they worked. Sunset of course played her guitar and ponied-up in front of her a couple times. True to Sunset’s advice, she had an extinguisher ready which saved them from causing a small fire.

As the experiments went on though the results proved less and less promising. Twilight had hoped to discover a reason why pony-ups occurred in the first place. A scientific basis beyond simply Sunset’s insistence they did it when they were showing “The truest parts of themselves”. A feat accomplished through music, though it seemed as a matter of self-expression as well. But all they discovered was there didn’t seem to be any gland in Sunset’s head. Not accounting for anywhere else, but she DID have a constant level of magic that was higher than the others in their normal forms.

That however was easily explained away by Sunset Shimmer being a unicorn to begin with. “I’m sorry.” was all Twilight could really think to say as she sat down, defeated. She didn’t really even know what she was doing. It was just like Sunset Shimmer told her during the Friendship Games. She didn’t know what she was doing. No matter how she said she was the smartest person in this dimension she knew, it didn’t make a difference.

Sunset though wasn’t about to let this girl beat herself up over this. No, she remembered feeling so weak and uncertain herself. She remembered feeling lonely and isolated, even surrounded by those she called her friends. Worse yet, she remembered how alone she had felt before. Sunset Shimmer and Twilight were more similar than anypony she had ever met. She didn’t think thoroughly before she embraced the girl, electrodes long removed. “You had better be sorry.”

Her words took Twilight by surprise even as she relaxed a little into the embrace. Sunset Shimmer was still smiling though as the girl who felt so helpless and useless to her new friend stared at her. “The Twilight Sparkle I’ve gotten to know wouldn’t let one little failure to discover keep her down.” She was about to insist she WASN’T that Twilight Sparkle. That Twilight Sparkle was a pony princess, but Sunset Shimmer stopped her. “The Twilight Sparkle I know was smart enough to find a way to locate a strange energy she didn’t understand. Find a way to contain and harness that same energy, the magic, and all without anypony-anybody’s help.” she nearly slipped into a pony pronoun.
Twilight continued to sit there, enthralled by Sunset Shimmer’s words and tone. “The Twilight Sparkle I’ve made friends with doesn’t need to feel alone anymore. You don’t need to feel sorry for anything other than being anything but the smart brilliant cute girl I’ve gotten to know.” Sunset Shimmer gently pushed some of Twilight Sparkle’s hair back as their eyes lingered on one another. A moment of almost pure silence between them before the purple girl leaned in.

The lonely girl’s temptations proved too great to resist as she felt her eyes wetting over with tears as her mouth pressed against Sunset Shimmer’s. She was already beginning to brace herself for when she’d be rejected. When she would push her away. It never came as Sunset Shimmer continued to hold her close. Both girls had known being alone. Neither was entirely sure what would come from this except one assurance. Neither of them would be alone again.

“Okay, Dean Cadence?” Twilight began, getting everyone’s attention. “Yes, Sunset Shimmer and I HAVE been sharing a lab, and we have been working on magic…but I haven’t gone experimenting on her or anything. I should consider that-no, no, stay on topic!” She insisted more to herself than anyone else. “Not to mention Sunset Shimmer and I have talked about what happened to her in the past all the time. She even told me it was okay to tell YOU that whole rampaging she-demon incident! Obviously since you mentioned it in your story.”

Everyone gathered in the room seemed to be noticing the holes Twilight was poking in the story. “Not to mention while I WILL admit that maybe I was lonely, once, it wasn’t anything THAT bad.” Everyone in the room, including Spike, raised an eyebrow at that last hole she tried to poke, “Okay, fine. I guess turning into a power-crazed demi-goddess does qualify as that bad. But me and Sunset Shimmer are just great friends… though how exactly did you know she WAS a unicorn?” She finally brought up the last question on her mind.

“Oh, Luna told me,” Cadence confessed quite casually as she gestured. The blue skinned and haired woman nodded without any apparent shame in outing Sunset Shimmer’s former species to Cadence. “It’s not like I’ve been telling anyone else or anything. It was after the friendship games and we were talking about all the crazy things that happened. It just came up.” Nobody in Twilight’s family seemed to question how something like that ‘just came up’ and Twilight didn’t feel like contending with it.

She was about to ask Luna why she thought she and her ACTUAL girlfriend were a couple when Celestia came back down. “Okay, I’ve finally got it all edited down in my head to the PG-13 version!” she announced proudly. Everyone of course turned their gazes on her as if to ask how she could be proud of THAT. Normal people didn’t usually need to edit a ‘ship’ however for fun down to a PG-13 version.

Luna seemed to concede the floor of the conversation to her older sister. Though not before pointing out, “I will use ‘The Voice’ to alert you if you get anywhere too far.” The threat seemed to resonate quite a bit with Celestia who just nodded sheepishly as she cleared her throat. Principal Celestia of course looking nervous as if she somehow suddenly forgot her plan for her ‘PG-13’ version now that Luna was acting as judge. Dean Cadence even brought a pair of earplugs out of her pockets. But she finally began after a moment’s pause.

It was a late evening at the Carousel Boutique, the shop to which Rarity devoted her loving craft. The streets empty as she dismissively shot her family a text of her late night work. Though in truth the work was not so much for the boutique as she would let them believe. Tonight was special to her. She had at last convinced Twilight, the Twilight of this world, to let her put her skills to work on her.

Twilight stood nervously upon the small raised platform Rarity encircled. She stood in nothing but her underwear-

CELESTIA!

Everyone in the room winced at that sudden almost ear-shattering bellow. Celestia even reached to her ear, as if to check if she could still hear. She frowned over at her sister. “What now, Luna? We are allowed to keep them within PG-13.” She insisted in frustration at the dark blue woman.

“We were, but I know you. What begins with undergarments rapidly moves to them being taken off, likely with you mentioning Rarity needing to have as much access to her direct skin as possible… ” she shot her sister a glare out of the corner of her eye. Everybody of course turned to look upon a sheepish Celestia who was wincing and nervously laughing.

“Okay, okay, so we’ll say she’s fully dressed then. Promise, no underwear...or nudity. I swear, partial or otherwise.” She insisted at her sister in obvious attempt to placate her. Luna nodded in agreement with Celestia’s newly placed limitation. Maybe if Twilight ran now, she could leave while her parents sat there mortified.

Twilight Sparkle stood in the rather drab shirt, tie and skirt she always wore. Despite of its plain and boring nature, it helped to give the girl a certain sense of comfort and professionalism. Her closet filled with nothing but the said clothing. It was part of the reason Rarity had invited her tonight. Rarity would never allow a girl to dress so drably without some attempts to aide her. Least of all one she felt so close to.

To Twilight’s surprise she would feel Rarity’s fingers gently touching her legs as the pale girl pressed into her back. “Relax, Darling. I merely need to know your measurements.” Her words belied a coy and flirtatious smirk as her fingers drew up from Twilight’s knees to the very hem of her skirt. Sliding higher along her hip as she seemed to measure her with nothing but touch alone. “Such long graceful legs… it’s such a shame you don’t show them off more.”

Twilight would release a soft gasp as her skin tingled at the strange intimate touch. Rarity’s hands came off her legs, gently moving to wrap an actual measuring tape around her midriff. Twilight could still feel Rarity lean against her back. Offering herself for support as Twilight felt the tape cinch a bit snug around her waist through her shirt.

The seamstress committed the measurements to memory without need for any noise except the two girls’ soft breaths. Her hands coming to almost gently tickle their way up her body to reach and feel at her bosom through her shirt. Firmly cupping her mounds-

IF YOU WILL NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY, STOP NOW!

Yet again everyone in the room, including an almost to the door Twilight Sparkle would cringe. Their ears ringing. Twilight cringed as she put her hands to her head. She saw how her mother had caught her attempt to run and while she couldn’t hear what she was saying, she knew she wanted her to sit down. She sighed in defeat and followed her mother’s command.

Everyone sat in mostly silence except Cadence who pantomimed she was going to get some water if anyone else wanted anything. Everybody but Luna shook their heads. By the time she returned, she had a glass for herself and Luna who quietly downed it. Hearing seemed to have returned. “Luna! I’ll have you know that heavy make-out sessions are decidedly PG-13,” Celestia complained at her sister. Obviously unrelenting on this one. “It’s certainly T-rated going by those games of yours.” Celestia smirked.

Luna merely nodded, “Perhaps, but you do seem to be forgetting you’re talking about their daughter being essentially molested. What you type on your computer or share with me is one thing but there are certain bounds of acceptability.” Celestia frowned but as she looked at the obviously unamused faces of the Sparkle family she nodded in embarrassment.

Celestia paused to compose herself once more. “Alright, alright. Third time’s the charm. No molestation, no underwear… ” she nodded as she started up for hopefully the last time.

Rarity’s fingers danced sensuously over Twilight’s body as she spun the girl around, unable to resist the Orchid girl’s innocent and charming temptation! Her hands furiously grabbed at her, reaching under her clothes as she locked lips with her in a moment of pure unbridled artistic passion!

TIA!

Celestia chuckled mischievously at her sister. “Sorry everyone. A hot steamy seamstress and the unfashionable girl she feels an irresistible urge to help and grow intimate with was about all I had.” She laughed a bit to herself as she at least seemed to get away with openly stating that.

Twilight stood up and examined her indeed somewhat drab clothes, pondering to herself if she was really THAT unfashionable. Rarity always said she had a certain ‘preparatory chic’ look to her. Though she had indeed invited her a couple times to the boutique to try and find some things more appropriate for her to wear that didn’t make her still look like a crystal prepper. Principal Celestia had always seemed almost godlike in her perfection. It was rather humiliating to learn she was some pervert like this.

Still now all eyes came to Luna who was still drinking water after her use of ‘the voice’ as she had so dubbed it. She sat there quite casually as the group looked upon her in silence as if any moment now expecting her take on how the two lovebirds got together. It was the perfect time for Twilight to start to try and sneak her way out. Spike following her even as Luna said, “I saw Rainbow Dash ask her out in the hallway during school.”

“What? No way!” Shining Armor demanded in obvious surprise. “How long… did you make that bet AFTER you already saw that?” He questioned at Luna in obvious displeasure. Not outright anger but annoyance seemed fitting enough. “The bet’s off, I want my money back.”

Celestia though merely laughed warmly, almost teasingly. “I don’t think so Shining Armor. I told you that making a bet with my sister was a foolish one. She doesn’t make such wagers unless she knows she can win or the odds are in her favor. You lost fair and square, so be a man and accept it.” Shining frowned at being essentially told off like that. The gentle yet still firm tone from the woman carrying that teacher’s authority of showing him a lesson. Never bet against Luna.

Cadence merely smiled sympathetically, “She is right. It’s not Luna’s fault that you made a bet like that… anyways, where were we?” She questioned, as if trying to remember why they had come there in the first place. It took her a moment, along with everyone else, to remember. “Right, Twili-oh… suppose I can’t blame her,” she admitted with a wince.

Everyone in the room except Celestia seemed sympathetic towards the girl who had run off to spare herself further embarrassment. “We can talk to her about her adjustment to the school itself another time, I suppose. For now, let’s focus on her home life…has she been adjusting well to living at home again? Cadence has told me she used to simply sleep in her old lab and if she wanted, and you approved, we could make similar, though not quite the same, arrangements for her at Canterlot High.” With newfound knowledge of the Principal’s private perversion amongst them, nobody seemed quite willing to speak in favor of it.

Author's Note

This chapter was pre-read and spellchecked by the helpful TwilightSparkleBestPony.

With this chapter, I'll admit I was considering going straight into Twilight running to hide in her bedroom and just mull over the 'anticlimactic' story of how she and Rainbow Dash started dating. But inspired a bit by Emerald Aegis, and just how much fun this is, I had decided to extend this into one more chapter. One where Twilight learns she isn't safe from shipping even among her friends. I'm taking suggestions but don't plan on doing 'repeat' pairs I've already put in and don't promise I'll mention every pairing suggested.

I also apologize if the SunLight bit wasn't quite up to everybody's standards. I have no apologizes over RariTwi. As much as I doubt I could get away with another 'Pervlestia' bit, it was fun to write.

Her Friends

Twilight was out of breath almost as soon as she made it to the café. She and her friends had planned to meet up after her ‘coming out’, to talk over how much damage had been done, or how well things had gone. After what she had just been through, Twilight was almost wishing they’d simply blow up at her. Spike followed along as quickly as his little legs could carry him. “Sorry I kind of encouraged everything, Twilight. It was my fault.” he offered in sincere apology.

The purple girl sighed tiredly, but tried hard to smile at Spike. “It’s okay, Spike. I know you didn’t mean for any of that to get so out of hand. I mean who could have predicted Principal Celestia had that side to her?” She pushed open the door and moved over to the couch, instantly taking up the newly opened space between her girlfriend and Rarity. She flopped beside her and rest her head on her shoulder.

Applejack looked upon her sympathetically. “Ah’ll take yer flippin’ out like that as a sign that things didn’t go too well?” The orange girl obviously feeling sorry for her. “Just give them time, Twilight. Ah’m sure they’ll come around.”

Twilight shook her head, “It’s not that, Applejack.” Everyone gathered looked at her in confusion, “Apparently my family already knew I was gay and are fine with it.” She, of course, saw a couple astonished looks from Rarity and Applejack at that one. The others seemed to be waiting for the real drama bomb. “The problem is that, they are so fine with it! They apparently all had these romantic ideas in their head that I should be dating one of you instead.”

Sunset Shimmer nodded. “That’s good though, right? I mean not the whole pairing you with everyone thing. But your family’s fine with you dating Rainbow Dash?” Twilight gave a weak nod, “Then why does it matter if they think you’re a better fit with someone else? I mean until I knew you were a lesbian; I was betting you’d start crushing on Flash Sentry like Princess Twilight.” Twilight wanted to argue that point, but didn’t really have the energy as she accepted a sip from the milkshake Rainbow had been drinking. The indirect kiss the farthest thing on her mind.

“The problem is that not only do they have ideas that I should be dating one of you, but apparently Principal Celestia has this whole perverted ship in her head between me and Rarity,” Twilight confessed with a tired sigh. She looked around expecting looks of shock and mortification. She kept her voice low enough so that nobody outside their little circle would hear but was starting to wonder if they even heard her. She noticed Rainbow Dash was rubbing the back of her neck nervously, and it dawned on her, “You all knew?”

Fluttershy who had allowed Spike to rest in her lap briefly raised the dog, almost as if in defense. “I-It’s not like she’s hurting anyone over it. Besides, we all have our own… dirty ships,” she decided to leave it at that. “I mean, everybody ships, right? Getting our own little ideas of who we think might make a nice couple,” She looked around almost hopeful for someone else to rise in agreement with her. Nobody spoke up but it seemed to be the silent consensus she was right.

Already Twilight was staring to get a bad feeling. First her parents, then it turned out the Principal… she should have expected this at the rate things were going. She leaned into her girlfriend tiredly, “Let’s hear them.” She waved dismissive hand at the obviously confused group gathered around. “Fluttershy just said everyone has their ‘dirty ships’. Let’s hear who all of you paired me with,” she requested. She might as well get it over with.

Sunset Shimmer was the only one to speak up in reply, “Like I said, before I knew you swung that way, I would have sworn you’d fall for Flash Sentry like Princess Twilight.” She was already expecting Sunset Shimmer to start some little idea or story on why she thought of it, but got nothing. Everyone was quietly looking at Sunset as if expecting her to say more, “What? After you two came out and said you were dating it didn’t seem right to pair you with someone else.”

Twilight felt at least some relief that Sunset had some sense as to not go shipping her with someone. Applejack though apparently didn’t. It was clear on her face she was hiding something as she sucked in her lips. Following Twilight’s gaze everyone saw the nervous cowgirl, “Well, ah’ll admit… even before you came out as likin’ girls, there was someone ah thought you might go crushin’ on.” She scratched her chin a bit nervously, “Ya’ll remember how Twilight used to go to Crystal Prep,” after a nod she continued, “Well ah kinda saw that Indigo girl givin’ Twilight the eye an’ thought there might be somethin’.”

Twilight was officially certain. Applejack had gone insane. “No offense but Indigo Zap is absolutely straight. I mean I’ll admit, she is kind of attractive,” Twilight paused as she noticed the look Rainbow Dash was giving her, “Oh come on, Rainbow Dash. You know I have a type.” She pointed out. She could see Rainbow Dash wanted to argue over her being absolutely one of a kind; but she’d need to be blind not to see it. “Point is she’s straight. She actually HAS a boyfriend. Trenderhoof, I think.”

Applejack frowned, “Ah can’t say ah know her better than you, Twilight. Yer the one that went to school with her, but ah’m tellin’ ya’ the truth. Ah saw her eyein’ you an awful lot and that just got me to thinkin’ ya’ll might’ve had somethin’. Ah won’t go into details. Ya’ already suffered Principal Celestia, so ah’ll just say it involves a lot of time in the locker rooms an’ leave it at that.”

Twilight almost wished Applejack had left it ‘ah won’t go into details’. Still at least she HAD the decency to stop there. Rainbow Dash of course looked at everyone, frowning a little, “Anybody else here pair Twilight up with another classmate from Crystal Prep?” Wanting to get that unfortunate idea out of the way. Nobody seemed to answer at first except for a milkshake slurping Pinkie Pie who was waving her arm to get attention. “Who is it, Pinkie?”

“Well technically she’s not a student, but I did notice how totally close and friendly Twilight and Dean Cadence were. I mean I get it’s more like a teacher-student big-sister little-sister dynamic but you can’t blame me for thinking it might be a little teenie eensie bit sweet that she had special feelings for you, right?” Pinkie Pie explained.

Twilight though indeed could blame her and had a perfectly valid reason, “There is the little matter of how I’m at least 99% certain she’s dating, and sleeping with, my brother. I mean he hasn’t actually SAID anything, but he has her singing a song as her customized ring tone.”

Pinkie though just shrugged, already getting up to go get a refill. Apparently sated by Twilight’s rebuttal. Her friend’s pairings were all pretty lackluster thus far. She had easily been able to dispel them and poke holes in their arguments without any effort; preventing ‘story time’. Fluttershy was up next, “I have one, but… well it’s probably just as silly as everyone else’s.” The shy girl looked nervously around the table and quietly confessed, “I ship twilight x twilight.”

“What now?” Rainbow Dash questioned, clearly confused over Fluttershy’s admission. It was definitely not the ship they’d expect out of Fluttershy. It violated all kinds of weird taboo rules in their heads. Not the least of which was one Rainbow Dash voiced, “Isn’t that kind of just self-cest? I mean I won’t lie; I might date another me ‘cause I’m THAT awesome but really?”

Twilight frowned and ribbed her girlfriend with her elbow, “Now who’s thinking about Indigo?” She pouted in annoyance. She might have been taking a slight jump in logic but the matter how similar Indigo and Rainbow Dash were proved hard to ignore. Especially given SHE was the one who pointed it out.

Sunset though pointed out, “I’m pretty sure she literally means the other her, Twilight. You didn’t think you were the only one with an Equestria double, did you?” At Twilight’s flush it became obvious she really had. “There’s a Rainbow Dash over there too… but she does have a point. Two Twilights being together sounds really weird.”

Fluttershy of course pouted a little, “I did try and say it was silly…but I can’t help it. I just imagine the two of them all cozy in bed together. N-Nothing indecent, just both of them all nice and cozy together reading books. Maybe even swapping books without a single word. Enjoying the nice peace and quiet together. A little kiss here and there, holding hands maybe. I-It just seemed really sweet.” She admitted.

Twilight sighed, “You and my mom really need to talk more…” If nothing else she did see what Fluttershy meant about how ‘cute’ it sounded in theory. “The only problem is I wouldn’t want to date another me. We wouldn’t just have a lot in common. We’d have everything in common. A relationship doesn’t work like that…”

“Guess you’ve got a point. There goes my plans on a foursome between both sets of us,” Rainbow Dash suggested, her tone difficult to decipher if she was joking or not. Twilight looked at her as if almost daring her to say another word, though the fire in her eyes died down quickly enough. “Seriously though. Why don’t you tell us who you think would make a cute couple? C’mon, you can’t tell me you never had ships of us.”

Twilight winced a little as the attention turned onto her. She nodded though, “I’ll admit I may have come up with an algorithm or two… or five to test compatibility matrixes between each of us, he-he-he,” she looked around as if expecting accusations of hypocrisy. None came though as she instead felt her girlfriend’s arm going around her supportively.

“That’s my nerdy little egghead,” she gloated proudly. Nobody seemed offended by her admission of an algorithm being used to determine their compatibility for Twilight’s amusement. “So who exactly did these algorithms match us with?” She questioned genuinely.

Twilight nodded, “I’ll admit there’s still a ton of errors in my formulas; most of them are based on information that I’ve only arbitrarily observed. Or heard of from all of you about your thoughts on each other an-“ she stopped a little sheepishly. Cadence’s story had been spot on, she did ramble. “And I guess that’s beside the point. If I had to pick one pairing it matched that got my attention… it would actually be you and Rarity.”

Rainbow Dash instantly started laughing, “You-ahaha-you’re kidding me, right? Me and Rarity? I mean no offense, Rares, but I don’t think I’d be able to handle you for a girlfriend. I can’t even imagine it.” She confessed, clearly amused by the suggestion. “I mean I’m so… and you’re so… ahahaha! There’s opposites attracting and then there’s that!”

Rarity hardly seemed at all unnerved by Rainbow Dash’s comment, instead smirking, “No offense taken darling. In my harems you are often forgotten,” she admitted openly. She didn’t seem remotely bothered at admitting to that. Everyone’s eyes resting on the fashionista diva who was hardly phased in the least, “I suppose technically I’d paired Twilight with myself… but I pair everyone with myself. Is it so wrong for a girl to want the entire school to worship and adore her and to contest for my attention?”

Applejack raised an eyebrow, “Uh…last ah checked, kind of. Especially since some of us ain’t exactly into girls, an’ some of the guys neither… though ah ain’t namin’ names ‘fore you go askin’ fer gossip,” she pointed out. Rarity didn’t seem phased by Applejack’s ‘correction’. “Not to mention, ah’m pretty sure Rainbow Dash wouldn’t wanna share her ‘egghead’ with you.”

Rainbow Dash of course looked sheepish as she realized she had been holding her girlfriend a bit possessively. The two clearly enjoying the simple contact in front of their friends. “Speaking of, how exactly did you two get together?” Rarity questioned, “No offense, but neither of you have been totally forthcoming with the tale of your blossoming romance.”

“Blossoming?” Rainbow questioned Rarity’s choice of wording. Still a brief embarrassed exchange of looks between her and Twilight had her nodding, “Alright, just… try not to get your hopes up. I’m not kidding when I say it started off about as boring as it gets.” Twilight settled comfortably with her girlfriend, thankful that at least somebody was going to hear the ‘real’ story instead of their silly little ship.

It was after history class one day. A subject Rainbow Dash was barely scraping by in but Twilight excelled. Even though she transferred when she did, the beautiful purple girl had already moved to head of the class. Front row beside Rainbow Dash. The teacher liked to keep the top students AND the trouble makers where he could see them. The cranky old mule.

Rainbow Dash was BI. It wasn’t something she advertised but didn’t exactly hide or lie about either. Her parents knew and didn’t seem to mind. Her dad liked to tease her a little, sure, but her mom was more annoying insisting that since her dating pool was ‘twice as large’ she shouldn’t be having as hard a time finding someone nice. Her mom was a sweet airhead and her dad a lovable lunk head.

But the one thing they both agreed on was that Rainbow really should try giving dating a serious shot. Rainbow wasn’t even really sure who to try and ask though. She didn’t know any other girls in school who were into other girls, and most of the guys she hung out with saw her as ‘one of the guys’ and would probably flip if she tried asking them out. It left her dating pool a lot smaller than her mom thought it was. The class let out of course and Twilight was about to run off.

She’d always found Twilight cute. Both the pony one and their world’s one. Though the actual human twilight did seem just a little cuter to her. It might have been a longshot. Hell in retrospect it was like kicking a goal from your own net into the opposing team’s. A feat she had accomplished in her supreme awesomeness. So she figured it was worth a shot. “Hey, Twilight?”

She managed to get the girl’s attention. Rainbow swallowed a nervous lump in her throat as she rubbed the back of her head nervously as Twilight replied, “Hey, Rainbow Dash. Need my notes?” She offered genuinely to her. As much as some people just saw the same nervous girl from the friendship games, she really had made a lot of progress. Borrowing her notes was a common occurance between them in the short time she’d been attending CHS.

“Um, no actually, least not right now,” she anxiously replied. Twilight of course stood there uncertainly, watching as Rainbow Dash fidgeted nervously. As long as she’d known her, which wasn’t that long, Rainbow Dash NEVER got nervous. She was too cool for that. A small part of Twilight thought a little about how this was starting to look like some awkward confession. She didn’t realize how right she was, “I was wondering if maybe you’d wanna catch a movie or something Friday night.”

She smiled, “Sure, what movie? Pinkie Pie mentioned wanting to see that new comedy, but Rarity does seem to prefer romances…Fluttershy can’t handle anything too scary or intense though,” she started, already going over the movies she knew were in town currently in her head.

“Um, no, I mean, without them…just you and me. You can pick the movie if you want, just I was kind of wondering if you’d wanna…go out. Like a date,” Rainbow Dash admitted. She saw Twilight’s mouth briefly hang open, “Listen, alright, if you’re not into girls, it’s cool. Really,” she started nervously. “We still could go, just like as friends instead, OR NOT, either way, I mean,” she tried to cover even after just coming out to her. She sounded SO dumb.

Twilight didn’t think she sounded dumb in the least though. She couldn’t help but pull a little at one of those long curly bits of her hair that framed her face, “Sure…there’s actually this new action movie I’d wanted to see. The effects look really impressive,” her cheeks were bright pink. “Oh, and I mean, like…as a date. I’m fine with girls. I actually,” she lowered her voice a little nervously, “Prefer girls. So…Friday then? Your house is closer to the theater, so I can pick you up?”

Rainbow Dash just nodded, “Right…you pick me up,” she answered to her without really thinking. Twilight just smiled and giddily hurried off. Rainbow Dash’s cheeks turned almost as pink as her eyes! She felt like she could fly without even having to pony up! “YEAAAAAAAAH! I’VE GOT A DATE!” She shouted as she started to run the opposite direction for her next class.

“You must be joking… that’s really all there was to it?” Rarity questioned in definite disbelief. The ivory girl rolling her eyes in exasperation, “Where is the heat? The passion? The feeling of longing and wanting?!” She exclaimed in obvious Rarity despair over how boring it was.

Applejack rolled her eyes, “No offense, Ms. Ah-wanna-whole-harem, but not everybody’s gotta have some big heavy drama like yer danged romance novels. Rainbow Dash and Twilight both just happened to like each other an’ decided to have a date and see where it goes. Real life ain’t some big fancy soap opera.”

Twilight nodded, not quite pulling away from her girlfriend but she had decided to sit up now, taking her head off her shoulder. “That really is all it was. We both happened to be attracted to each other and decided to go out on a date. It went really nice, I kissed her, and we’ve been dating ever since…what?” Twilight stared around the table as everyone dropped their jaws; including Spike who she was CERTAIN she’d told about this.

“You kissed her?” Fluttershy questioned, the first to get her jaw to stop hanging from her face. “I mean... t-that’s totally fine, just I would have thought Rainbow Dash would be the first one to make a big move like that. Whenever I imagine Rainbow Dash with someone, she’s always the one to start the kiss,” she confessed. Twilight already felt it. “Even when I imagined her and Applejack, it’s always Rainbow Dash who goes first.” Here it came. One pairing her algorithms supported WAS Applejack and Rainbow Dash, and she didn’t have an argument!

Twilight cringed, awaiting another embarrassing story; this time about her girlfriend putting the moves on Applejack! She almost jealously clung to her in front of everyone. No story came though, instead everyone looked at her with concern, Sunset Shimmer asking, “Are you okay, Twilight? I mean; you look like you’re about to jump out of your seat.”

Twilight tried to cover, not wanting her friends to get too concerned. She’d already shared as much about the earlier incident as she cared to ever relive! “I’m fine, totally fine, absolutely fine. What would ever make you think I wasn’t fine? Weren’t we talking about me kissing Rainbow Dash? Right, that story, now!”

Before Twilight could get a word out though Sunset Shimmer chuckled, “Starting to get what you mean Rainbow Dash. She is pretty cute when she starts rambling.” Twilight was NOT about to let Dean Cadence have the satisfaction on this as she started to explain the date! She wasn’t about to let anyone interrupt!

The two had done their best to dress as normally and ‘casually’ as possible. Which meant Rainbow Dash had sat through an hour of letting her mom brush out her hair to get all the tangles out while Twilight had fretted for fifteen minute straight on the fraction of a centimeter length difference between two of her skirts. The two girls both freaking a bit about their first date for varying reasons. Rainbow Dash because it was her first ‘real’ date in forever and Twilight out of a fear this might ruin the friendship she’d already had developing with her. Why had she said yes? If this didn’t go well it might just ruin things between them! Rainbow Dash as having similar thoughts though more about the idea of humiliating herself in front of Twilight that she wouldn’t WANT to be her friend.

The only big difference between their normal outfits was the jacket Twilight had allowed her brother to insist she take with her; though he hadn’t known WHO she was going out with. It was of course a Crystal Prep letterman’s jacket and looked ridiculous on her. But he seemed under the impression it was lucky and had pointed out how theaters always cranked up the AC. The AC was a fair point but if so why couldn’t she just wear her own jacket? Why’d he insist it was somehow lucky? She started to have less than polite ideas behind that and stopped questioning it.

Instead she merely met Rainbow Dash who was waiting outside her house. She didn’t wanna subject Twilight to the embarrassment that was her parents. She had though seen the pair looking at them through a window snapping pictures through it of the pair before they started for the theater. The movie had been out for a week so grabbing tickets, seats, and snacks hadn’t been too much trouble.

Twilight though wasn’t as cold as her brother suggested. Then again she had the foresight to wear her vest and a longer sleeved shirt. As they sat side by side letting the trailers roll, Twilight almost wondered how she’d let her brother convince her of this to begin with. Though she’d son notice Rainbow Dash rubbing her arms a little. They weren’t directly under a vent but the shorter sleeved jacket she wore didn’t offer as much protection as it looked. Twilight didn’t even think before shrugging the jacket off and helping Rainbow Dash pull it on, “Sorry it’s Crystal Prep,” she’d apologized.

“It’s cool, would have worn something warmer but wasn’t thinking,” she lied through her teeth. Her dad had told her to just stick with her normal clothes and ‘if she got cold’ to use it for an excuse to get cozy with Twilight. Ugh, how’d she let that dork convince her that was a smart idea! She felt so stupid for even hearing him out. Besides, of course Twilight would have a jacket. She was super smart and prepared for anything.

Both girls felt a little stupid for listening to their families on this matter. Regardless the movie started up and both girls got into it. The theater empty enough Rainbow Dash could laugh or make some smart-ass remark about how stupid this one guy was or Twilight could murmur about how totally unbelievable or non-canon something in it was compared to the comic. Apparently a bit of a cute nerd under all that brainy dork. It felt pretty normal though. Like some normal movie with a friend until Twilight finally reached for popcorn only to find her hand resting a little on Rainbow Dash’s.

The brief almost comically cliché contact caused both to flinch in embarrassment. Rainbow Dash pulling her own hand back to stuff her mouth with popcorn and avoid saying something stupid. Twilight liked Rainbow Dash. She was fun to be around; and Twilight probably wouldn’t have come to the movie by herself. She saw Rainbow Dash resting her hand on the armrest…it might have been a little presumptuous but she moved her hand right over Rainbow Dash’s. Testing the waters somewhat.

Rainbow Dash wanted to make a move. She totally did. But she didn’t want to rush things or do something stupid. The one time in her life Rainbow Dash wished she actually knew HOW to take things slow. She almost didn’t realize Twilight had touched her hand until she felt her fingers lacing between them from on top. Twilight was holding her hand. Twilight was freaking holding her hand!

Rainbow Dash watched the movie go on, but finally had to break the contact. She liked it but…well it still felt a little ‘safe’. Okay so if Twilight was willing to let things move a bit quick, so was she. She noticed the surprised look Twilight gave her until her arm moved around her. Twilight felt Rainbow Dash gently draping her arm around her. Inviting her almost to rest her head against her shoulder as the movie went into a sappier intimate moment.

The two girls on their date sitting there talking all throughout the credits, “I still can’t believe they gave Zapp rainbow hair…no offense, I mean it’s actually really nice on you,” she pointed out a little embarrassed, “But it does look a little silly when she’s supposed to be thunder wielding princess Aurora. And making her ‘long’ for Matterhorn? They had to up the romance, huh?”

Twilight nerded out a little, with Dash laughing, “So you really think rainbow looks good on me, huh?” she questioned a little teasingly, Twilight’s head still comfortable resting against her. “What was with Mistress Marvelous having a country accent though? What? Was her ‘ancient lost city’ founded by southern pioneers or something in this?”

The two girls enjoyed talking shit about how bad and silly the movie was. And of course about how they were definitely going to rent it to watch again once it came out. The first date hadn’t been anything excessive but had felt nice. Especially as Twilight walked Rainbow Dash home. “You know, next time, I so get to walk you home instead. No offense but I am pretty sure it’s the ‘guy’s’ job to walk you home, and I’m way more the guy here then you,” she joked.

Twilight smiled. It was a bit hilarious though to hear Rainbow talk about that little outdated gender paradigm especially considering how she was pretty sure Rainbow was more into the bad forced romance in the movie than her. “Really now?” She questioned as they now stood outside Rainbow’s house. “Pretty sure it’s also the ‘guy’s’ job to start the kiss too.” She had taken her brother’s jacket back and leaned in, planting a soft sweet kiss on her cheek. She pulled back…and ran faster than she really knew she was capable of. All the while thinking four words, I kissed Rainbow Dash!

Twilight flushed a little as Applejack stared, “Ya’ll have gotta be pullin’ ma’ leg here.” She insisted, clearly disbelieving of that. “So not only were you the one that went makin’ first contact, but you were also the one that gave her the first kiss?”

Rarity frowned, “I would hardly consider that an appropriate first kiss, darling,” Applejack frowned a little at the use of the word after Rarity’s confession of her ‘harem’ fantasy. It didn’t last but still it seemed she didn’t take kindly to the suggestion, “I mean a true first kiss absolutely MUST be lips to lips or it simply doesn’t count.”

Sunset Shimmer laughed, “I’m kind of with Rarity on this. No offense but in Equestria that kind of a kiss ONLY counts if you’re a couple school foals. I might not be a shining example of it, but affection, especially public displays of it, are kind of commonplace.”

Fluttershy though interjected, apparently feeling a need to speak, “I don’t know. I’d say it sounds like a rather sweet first kiss. Not everyone’s idea of romance or what qualifies as ‘appropriate’ are exactly the same after all.”

Rainbow Dash just rolled her eyes, “Ugh, c’mon, alright? I say it was our first kiss; even if I didn’t get to do any kissing it STILL counts for me and Twilight. And we’re the ones actually dating. When was the last time any of you actually went on a date to argue what makes for a first kiss anyways?” Twilight smiled. Rather pleased at her girlfriend’s almost prideful insistence ‘it counted’. The rest of their conversation felt almost like a blur.

The stress of her earlier trauma at the words of Principal Celestia almost forgotten as she relaxed there hearing her friends and girlfriend talk. She got a brief text from her family apologizing for ‘everything’ and saying it was ‘safe’ to come back. But she figured might be nice to wait a little while and just relax there in her girlfriend’s arm.

Author's Note

And this concludes Everyone Ships Twilight. Yet again this chapter was spell checked and proofread by TwilightSparkleBestPony.

I hope everyone at least enjoyed a laugh at some point. This is at its core just a comedy. A silly fun comedy that I wanted to, in a kind of silly way, poke fun at shipping itself. I am in no way against ships and want to make that clear. I just wanted to express how ships can be from cute and darling like how I presented Twishy to how a bit more 'intimate' I tried to present SunLight (Sci version) and Twilight x Pinkie...all the way to basically just clop like what Pervlestia presented. I may revisit Pervlestia in the future as kind of a 'framing device' behind some outrageous clops should I do any in the future, of course with appropriately aged characters.

Again, I hope I got you to laugh at least once with this and thank you for reading it.