Princess Celestia, Solar Alicorn, had lived for centuries. She had banished Nightmare Moon, slain Queen Tiamat in honourable combat, and could listen to petitioners drone on for hours without losing her queenly mask.
Her tea long since drained, she had listened to the recently crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle sing her praises for the last half hour in her own sitting room. And yet it took every iota of control Celestia had garnered to hide her despair.
“I apologize, Twilight, that was a very nice list, but I cannot return your affections.”
Twilight bowed her head as her ears drooped. “O-Oh, t-that’s-” A mirthless chuckle escaped as she extended a wing. “I should have known better than to think I was worthy now that I’m a princess.”
Celestia flinched, though Twilight couldn’t see it. “Is that what you think?” A pursed lip was the only other outward sign that her heart was breaking further, torn between leaving things as they were and hope Twilight would heal, or explaining why and risk destroying Twilight utterly. Cadance was right. I can not hide this any longer, and Twilight deserves the truth.
A soft golden glow surrounded her horn as she contacted Philomena. The phoenix appeared in a burst of flame, eliciting a surprised gasp from the purple pony. “Philomena here will keep you company while I go get some things. I should be back in 15 minutes.”
Twilight raised her head and gave a brief nod as Celestia got off her cushion and left her private study. Once Celestia had left she grabbed Philomena and broke down crying.
~~~~~
Twenty minutes later Celestia returned bearing a service tray with two cakes and a fresh pot of tea. Twilight had tried to hide her tears, but Celestia could see them plain as day. The white alicorn sat down upon her cushion once again and with a puckish smile, threw one of the cakes at Twilight’s face. Immediately she felt terrible, her mood worsening. Even in her mind the justification of wanting Twilight to treat her like a pony rung so very hollow.
“W-w-what was that for!” Twilight spluttered as she used her checklist to wipe cake off her face.
Celestia just ignored Twilight’s question as her smile grew more strained. “Do you remember your brother’s wedding?”
Parchment makes for a poor towel, but it had at least sufficed to remove most of the cake from Twilight’s eyelids. “What does THAT have to anything?!”
“Humour me Twilight.”
Twilight could only whisper. “No one believed me. I made a mistake not mentioning our ladybug dance, but no one believed me, and that creature threw me into the crystal caverns. She was overconfident though. I found Cadance, we got out, and saved the kingdom.”
“We all made mistakes Twilight. But yours would not have changed mine.”
“No that isn’t true Prin-”
“I could not trust you.”
Twilight’s eyes widened at that. “W-what?
Celestia just looked off into the distance and sighed. “I could not trust you. And how could I? You cast a Want-It-Need-It spell on your doll and brainwashed an entire town over a late friendship report!”
Twilight could barely think. She knew that wasn’t her proudest moment, but she had thought her teacher had forgiven her! Yet here she was...yelling at Twilight with tears streaming down her face.
“You freaked out about a late report, afraid I would send you back to magic kindergarten. That hurt, so very much! After a decade of teaching, you thought I would do something like that! That you should have known me better, but you did not! That you could not trust me to be reasonable!”
Celestia shuddered and took a breath to try and calm herself as Twilight reeled. Of course Twilight trusted the Princess, she had always looked up to her as the pinnacle of pony perfection!
“It opened my eyes however.” Celestia continued tonelessly. “I could not help but look back at my life and what a mess I made of it. Too distant with you, because I was afraid of pushing you away like I did Sunset. Sealing Discord in stone, only to discover years later that he had already corrupted Sombra. The Crystal Empire disappearing. Banishing my sister, because I was too enthralled by the devotion of my subjects to see that she was suffering.”
Twilight walked around the table and wrapped her forelegs around Celestia’s barrel as they both began openly crying. This can’t be happening! I can’t have broken Princess Celestia! She’s been around for millennia, she’s always calm, always smiling.
“If I could no longer trust you," Celestia choked out, "then it was myself I could not trust most of all. The wedding came around and we received a warning that Canterlot was about to be attacked. I sent Luna out to other countries, to try and get more information on the threat. The warning was so vague, yet I could not risk any danger to my little ponies. We know now why Cadance was so disturbed, but at the time I did not dare trust my own judgement.
“You came into the rehearsal with your warning, and it felt like Smarty Pants all over again. Shining Armor and Chrysalis, that fake that masqueraded as Cadance,” Celestia spat with enough venom in her voice to give the changeling queen heartburn, ”their excuses made just enough sense that I felt relief and sorrow. Relief, that maybe my judgment wasn’t so impaired. Sorrow that you would give so far to impugn Cadance’s character. I wanted you to reflect, to recognize your mistakes and go back to being my wonderful, faithful student.”
Celestia turned her head to gaze into Twilight’s eyes, pleading, begging for forgiveness she didn’t dare hope for. “I never did apologise to you for that. After Smarty Pants I just could not. I could not look you in the eyes, knowing you thought I was perfect. Knowing that you could, you would forgive me anything, even when I did not deserve it, and for that, I am so so sorry.”
Twilight opened and closed her mouth for a few moments, thoughts racing. She wanted so badly to tell Princess Celestia that it was fine, Twilight had forgiven her long ago, but the words wouldn’t come. One thought amongst the others kept repeating itself.I’ve never seen her cry this much before. In fact I think the only other time I saw her cry...was when Luna came back.
Accepting her silence as answer enough, Celestia inhaled deeply and soldiered on. “When you burst into the wedding with Cadance in tow I was so angry at Chrysalis for her duplicity. But most of all I was angry at myself. That, I fear, was why I could not defeat her, and forced you and your friends to do so.”
“We failed though! It was Cadence and Shining that saved everypony that day!” Twilight protested weakly. Thoughts unbidden sprang to mind, of her mentor trapped in a cocoon.
“Oh Twilight,” said Celestia with a wan smile. “Never underestimate the power of a good distraction.” Her smile vanished like morning dew under the sun as she continued. “Once Cadance came back from her honeymoon and heard what I had done…”
~~~~~~
“YOU. DID. WHAT?!”
Celestia, Diarch of the Sun, had faced down many things in her long life. Discord, Sombra, Nightmare Moon, and Tiamat were but a few of the notable foes she had triumphed over.
None had inspired fear like the livid pretty pink pony princess in front of her now.
“She came into rehearsal and claimed you were evil without proof….”
“AND THAT WASN’T YOUR FIRST CLUE?!?!” Cadance punctuated her outburst with a stomp of her hoof that cracked stone for meters around before shaking her head. “Just....shut up, stay there and do NOTHING. I need to calm down and grab Luna for this. We have a LOT to talk about.”
~~~~~
“Ever since you had acquired your Cutie Mark I had planned to groom you to become an alicorn, but after Smarty Pants I was no longer confident in any of my plans. It was Luna and Cadence who convinced me to go ahead with them. I was so proud of the way you and your friends came together to save the Crystal Empire.
“It was after your coronation that my doubts came back even stronger than ever, when Luna confronted me with visions of your friends nightmares. Of YOUR nightmares. For Faust’s sake! I never thought to warn you not to read it aloud! I sent it to you hoping you could do what I could not; to make sense of it, complete it! And it very nearly ruined all your lives!”
Twilight could only stare at the mare that had taught her magic for over half her life. She had expected a kind dismissal, a heartfelt “I love you too!” , to be laughed at. The princess breaking down in tears had NEVER occurred to her, and she thought she had covered every contingency!
But Twilight was quickly realizing that while she had come into Celestia’s private chambers, checklist in hoof, ready to confess...that list had a bunch of wonderful qualities of Celestia the Princess, not Celestia the mare.
Celestia was now openly sobbing with her muzzle buried under Twilight’s wing. Twilight closed her eyes for a moment as she made a resolution:If Celestia needed a shoulder to cry on and somepony to talk to, then Twilight Sparkle was her pony! And if...no. Celestia needed her now.
“And to top it all, I find out that Luna and I nearly destroyed Equestria by taking the Elements out of the Tree of Harmony!” Celestia finished with a wail.
Well, that last bit is incredibly awkward. Twilight fidgeted while she organized her thoughts. She had to proceed very carefully and somehow calm the Solar Diarch down without making things worse and she still had cake on her face and it had gotten into her mane and Fluttershyhadspentsomuchtimemakingherlooknice-Focus Twilight! Deep Breath. Hold. Exhale. Inhale.
Feeling as calm as anypony could be in her situation, Twilight rubbed Celestia's back with a forehoof. “Princess, you’re being too hard on yourself.”
“Like Tartarus I am!” Celestia screamed. "I'm worthless!"
Twilight’s ears pinned back under the vocal assault as she scrambled for a response. I can’t do this! I wish Fluttershy were here, maybe she could calm Celestia down!
Fluttershy...that’s it! This all started because of friendship reports, maybe I can solve it with one!
“Celestia, do you remember when Fluttershy was modeling for Photo Finish?”
Sniffles and a quiet “Yes” were all that came forth from under Twilight's wing.
“Rarity was so jealous of Fluttershy modeling for Photo Finish and doing the thing Rarity always wanted, and Fluttershy hated it but continued because she was afraid of disappointing Rarity. If they had just talked about their feelings the situation could all have been avoided. And,” Twilight couldn’t stop the blush at remembering how she was so frustrated at the whole thing that she nearly ended up spilling a secret or two herself, ”I wouldn’t have made a fool of myself trying to keep things in.”
Twilight raised her wing and lifted Celestia’s face up so she could look her in the eyes. “You’ve done the same thing, and I’m so sorry for my part in that. You are a wonderful pony, and an amazing leader to have ruled over a peaceful thousand years. But you had to do so without your sister to confide in, keeping everything bottled up until the dam broke.
“Now you have Luna, Cadance, and me to talk to. You don’t need to hold it in anymore. I’m here for you now.” Twilight wrapped her arms and head around Celestia in a crushing hug as Celestia broke down once more.
~~~~~
“Now, what do you say we clean up? I want to get this cake off my face.” Twilight asked as she got up and headed to Celestia’s bathroom.
Celestia couldn’t help but smile at her former student. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like me to lick it off?”
The purple pony just yelped and bolted into the bathroom, desperate to hide her blush. Once she got inside, a thought occurred to her and she suppressed a smile. Twilight poked her head out to glare at Celestia, who had just levitated the cake to her mouth. "HEY! Cake's mine!" At Celestia's raised eyebrow Twilight just narrowed her eyes and jabbed a hoof in Celestia's general direction. "You. Owe. Me." Suitably chastened, Celestia set the cake down on the table.
Once Twilight had showered she walked out and glanced at the clock. “Your turn. Wouldn’t want to shock anypony at Day Court, would we?” she asked as innocently as she could.
Celestia chuckled as she got up. “Thank you Twilight. For everything. I think I’ll take a bath, I do have about an hour before court begins.”
Twilight glanced at the clock again. “Oh no, I’m going to miss my train, bye Celly!” With that Twilight ran out of the sitting room.
Celestia stared. ‘Celly?’ Shrugging, she walked into her bathroom to wash her face, only for her sitting room door to slam open again and Twilight's head popping into view.
A shout of “CAKEFLANK!” was her only warning as Twilight’s horn lit up and flung the poor cake at Celestia’s rump. If Celestia was confused before, now she was completely dumbfounded as the purple pony vanished from sight and cake dripped from her cutie mark.
It wasn’t until she was relaxing in the bath that it dawned on her that Twilight Sparkle just pranked her.
Author's Note
Author's Notes
