THE INCIDENTAL PONY
By Fervidor
Lyra Heartstrings took a sip of her cappuccino and casually turned her head just enough for her eyes to track Twilight Sparkle wandering through the marketplace across the street. As usual, the Princess of Friendship had chosen to appear unadorned by any regalia and moved about without pretense of superiority, occasionally stopping to chat with her fellow ponies as were she still just their local librarian. The humble impression was however somewhat offset by the escort of royal guards who followed in her path, silently scowling at nothing in particular.
The guards were new. Even after becoming royalty, Twilight had never bothered with such formalities before. Still, the last couple of days it seemed she never left her castle without at least two armored, stone-faced pegasus stallions following her around like a pair of gleaming shadows. Lyra had no idea what that was all about, but she found this sudden change unnerving.
“Lyra, are you listening to a word I'm saying?”
Lyra tore her eyes away from Twilight and turned to Bon Bon sitting across her with a look of mild annoyance on her face.
“Um, sorry,” Lyra said, hoping she hadn't been too obvious this time. “I got distracted.”
“Yeah,” Bon Bon made a point of looking straight at Twilight, who had just approached Big Macintosh at the apple stand, “I noticed.”
“Ehehe...” Lyra scratched the back of her head, feeling very awkward. “But don't you think it's strange, though? A bunch of guards showing up out of nowhere just like that?”
“Well, Twilight Sparkle is a princess now,” Bon Bon pointed out. “Princesses are supposed to have guards.”
“Yes, but in Ponyville?” Lyra raised her cup again. “I mean, what are they supposed to be guarding her from? Is there some kind of threat we don't know about?”
Bon Bon gave the unicorn a sly grin. “Maybe Twilight has finally noticed you stalking her, and thought this might scare you off?”
Lyra nearly choked on the cappuccino. “Wh-What? Come on, it's not like that! Me and Twilight are old friends from school.”
“Yes, you've told me.” Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “And yet I've never seen you talk to her, and I don't think she even knows you live in Ponyville. You just follow her around and watch her from a distance. I thought it was cute at first but now it's starting to get a bit disturbing. And don't think I didn't notice that you picked a café with a patio overlooking both the market and her castle.”
“This is the only outdoor café in town!”
“Don't change the subject.”
Lyra sighed. “Look, it's complicated. Ever since Twilight left Canterlot to save Equestria that first time, she hasn't exactly been paying much attention to me or Minuette or any of the old gang. Honestly, I'm pretty sure she forgot all about us somewhere along the way. Then she went and grew herself a pair of wings, and then she went and grew herself a huge crystal castle... She just hasn't been very approachable, is what I'm trying to say.”
“What, are you scared she thinks she's too good for you now?” Bon Bon looked very skeptical. “She's the Princess of Friendship.”
“Yeah, and she's really good at it.” A slight tone of bitterness crept into Lyra's voice before she could stop it. “She's got a whole bunch of new friends keeping her busy these days.” She frowned slightly. “Though, come to think of it, where are they? I haven't seen any of them around lately.”
“Well, I know from the Cakes that Pinkie Pie took some time off to visit her relatives,” Bon Bon said. “And Applejack went to Appleoosa for something, which I bet involves apples somehow. Oh, and the flower girls told me Rarity is in Canterlot, something about opening up a new boutique.” She giggled. “I always knew that mare would make it big eventually. As for Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, I have no idea. Maybe they're off on some adventure or eloped or something?”
“Huh.” Lyra shrugged. “Well, I guess that explains it.”
“But, seriously, Lyra,” Bon Bon leaned forward, looking more earnest now. “If you want to talk to her, then go talk to her. Just walk up to that pony and go: 'Hello! Remember me? Good old Lyra Heartstrings, your childhood friend? Turns out we've lived in the same town all along. Surprise!'”
“I wish it was that easy,” Lyra muttered. She looked towards Twilight again, who seemed to have finished her conversation with Macintosh. Did Lyra imagine it, or did she look... disappointed? Worried? The alicorn princess turned her head, and for a moment her gaze met with Lyra's. There was a spark of recognition in Twilight's eyes and a smile shimmered on her lips.
Lyra snapped her head back around in a sudden panic, realizing in the same instance that doing so had been a mistake. Impossible. Twilight couldn't have noticed her, let alone recognized her.
Bon Bon had noticed, however. “Wow. You have a serious problem.”
“No I don't.”
“You are so stalking her!”
Lyra rubbed her eyes and groaned. “Let's just go home, okay?”
Bon Bon didn't argue. After she finished off the last of her coffee, the two of them left the patio and started the walk back to their mutual home, a tense silence hanging between them.
After about a minute of this, Bon Bon glanced at Lyra again. “Just for the record, if this is all some kind of scheme to make me jealous, it's kinda working.”
Lyra grit her teeth and groaned.
“So are you really moving to Ponyville?” Star Sapphire asked, struggling a bit to speak clearly with her shopping bag hanging from her mouth.
“Yep,” Lyra said. “I like Canterlot well enough, but I figure it's time for a change of scenery. School didn't go as well as I hoped, and the big city is a bit too hectic for me anyway.”
“Well, I'm sure you'll love Ponyville,” Star said. “It's a great place to settle down, and the ponies are all very friendly. Of course, we do get the occasional monster wandering in from the Everfree Forest, but most of the time it's a very peaceful town.”
“Hey, I wouldn't want it to get too boring,” Lyra laughed.
She didn't know Star Sapphire that well, but the two of them had run into each other on the way to the train station and struck up a conversation when Lyra happened to bring up Star's hometown. Lyra couldn't deny that she appreciated the company, if only because it helped her take her mind off things.
Hearing the sound of galloping hooves, she looked up to see Twilight Sparkle, Celestia's personal student, come running down the street with that familiar look of focused determination on her face. It was the look she always had when there was a book to read somewhere, and Twilight would not rest until it had been located and read.
Lyra raised her hoof in a friendly wave, but Twilight didn't even turn her head to look, running straight by the pair as if they didn't exist. Her hoof still hanging in the air, Lyra watched the unicorn speed down the road and felt a stab of regret in her heart. For a brief moment, she wondered if she had made the right choice.
Star Sapphire frowned. “Well, that was kinda rude.”
“Don't take it personally,” Lyra said with a sigh. “She does that all the time.”
“Do you know her?”
“...No,” Lyra shook her head. “Not really. So, tell me more about Ponyville.”
The two continued on their way, and Lyra let her heart grown numb to those last lingering doubts. It was too late for regrets anyway.
At least it had been a successful test.
The mood had not improved once Lyra and Bon Bon made it back to the house. In fact, Bon Bon had barely said a word to Lyra since they stepped through the door. She didn't seem angry, just strangely aloof and distant, as if she had something on her mind but no desire to share it.
Lyra didn't like it. She had always known Bon Bon to be open and vocal about her feelings, which made this sudden cold shoulder treatment very alarming.
Upon returning home, Bon Bon had simply planted herself upon the living room sofa and stuck her muzzle in a newspaper. At first Lyra had opted to give her some space hoping she would eventually open up, but Bon Bon had been sitting there for a while now and seemed too focused on reading to pay attention to anything around her. This worried Lyra for two reasons: It was yesterday's paper, and Bon Bon had yet to turn a single page. She may as well have been holding it upside down.
Realizing she would have to take the initiative, Lyra took a seat on the other end of the sofa. “So, what do you think we should have for dinner tonight?”
“I dunno,” Bon Bon mumbled. “I'll think of something.”
“Well... if you don't feel up to it, maybe I should cook dinner tonight?” Lyra suggested. That usually did the trick. Bon Bon had never allowed Lyra to be in charge of the meals - as much as she loved food, Lyra couldn't cook anything more complicated than a daisy sandwich to save her life.
Bon Bon just shrugged. “Yeah, sure.”
Lyra sighed. “Okay, seriously, what's wrong? You've been all distant and on edge for a while now, something is definitely bothering you.”
Bon Bon didn't reply, still hiding behind her wall of paper.
“Come on, Bon, talk to me,” Lyra tried again. “Don't tell me this is about Twilight?”
“It's not that.” Bon Bon finally folded the newspaper up and put it down. She looked very uncomfortable. “Actually... Look, there's something I need to ask you about.”
That didn't sound good – she had said it in the same tone most ponies reserved for things like 'I need to do my taxes' or 'I have to get this angry wolverine out of my house somehow.' The fact that she didn't want to was heavily implied.
“Well?” Lyra prodded. “Ask away.”
Hesitating for another moment, Bon Bon drew a deep breath. “Lyra, where do you get all your money?”
“What?” Lyra gave Bon Bon a perplexed look. That was not a question she had been expecting. “Where did that come from?”
“I think it's a pretty straightforward question,” Bon Bon said. “I'd like to know how you earn your living.”
“Bon, you know what I do. When I'm not with you, I play the lyre and do odd jobs if somepony needs an extra hoof, and the rest of the time I just mess around like the unambitious, irresponsible, deadbeat magic school dropout I happen to be.”
“And that unambitious deadbeat magic school dropout is very dear to me,” Bon Bon said. “Which is why I don't like it when you're keeping secrets.”
“I would have thought you of all ponies should know about secrets, Sweetie,” Lyra said, perhaps a bit sharper than necessary.
Bon Bon winced. “I thought we were over that. I wanted to tell you about my past, Lyra, but I couldn't.”
“I guess I can understand that,” Lyra muttered. It was true, but she was still annoyed. “Why the sudden interest in my income, anyway?”
“Because it doesn't make any sense!” Bon Bon exclaimed. “In all the time I've known you, I have never seen you even try to find a proper day job. You spend most of your time busking in the park and stalking Princess Twilight...”
“I told you, it's not...”
“...yet somepony is obviously paying you wages. Like, serious work type money. I've had a look at your finances and you somehow have more disposable income than I do.”
“So now you're going through my personal affairs behind my back?” Lyra's eyes narrowed. “Did they teach you that in spy school?”
“Lyra!” Bon Bon snapped, but Lyra's glare didn't falter. After a brief but intense silence, Bon Bon sighed and her frown softened. “...I'm sorry. You're right, I shouldn't be snooping. It's just, I'm worried, okay?”
Lyra raised an eyebrow. “Worried about what?”
“It's not...” Bon Bon hesitated. “...It's not anything illegal, is it?”
“What?” Lyra's eyes went wide. “No, of course not! Why would you ever think that?”
“Is it something dangerous, then?”
“No, Bon Bon. It's not dangerous, and it's not illegal.”
“Then why the secrecy?” Bon Bon asked. “Why don't you want to tell me?”
“Because...” Leaning back on the sofa, Lyra groaned and put a foreleg over her eyes. “Because it's embarrassing, okay?”
Bon Bon blinked. “Embarrassing?”
Lyra nodded, looking away. “Mm-hm.”
“...How embarrassing?”
“Really embarrassing.”
“Like, say,” Bon Bon leaned closer, “more embarrassing than stuffing yourself with my imported oats and being too scared to tell me?”
Lyra nodded again. “Even more embarrassing than that.”
Bon Bon's face suddenly broke into a grin. “Okay, now you have to tell me.”
“No I don't, and you can't make me.” Lyra crossed her hooves in defiance. “Nopony must know. I will take this secret to my grave.”
“Oh, come on!” Bon Bon pleaded. “If you can't trust me, then who can you trust? I told you my dark secret nopony must ever know. You tell me yours and then we're even, right?”
“That isn't at all how that...”
“Besiiiides,” Bon Bon pressed on with a sing-song voice, now leaning her head against Lyra's shoulder, “didn't you say that it was thrilling to reveal your deepest, darkest secrets?”
Cheater, Lyra thought. Bon Bon knew she was weak against physical contact. “I think I've had enough thrills for one lifetime.”
“Teeeell meeeee!”
Lyra groaned again. “Okay! Okay! If it'll get you to stop nagging! But not a word of this to anypony, alright? This stays between us and that's it.”
Bon Bon immediately sat up straight with an expectant look on her face. “Not a word. Cross my heart.”
Drawing her hoof through her mane, Lyra took a deep breath. “Okay. See, back when I was still in school, I wrote this song, right? And it ended up being a big hit. I've been living off the royalties ever since.”
“You have a hit?” Bon Bon looked genuinely surprised. “Why haven't I heard it?”
“Oh, you have,” Lyra sighed. “It's a very popular Hearth's Warming song.”
“No way!” Bon Bon gasped. “Which one did you write? I must know!”
“Must you really?” Lyra asked.
Bon Bon gave a firm nod. “I must. Really.”
Lyra closed her eyes, dreading what was to come next. “...Ponies be Jolly.”
“Oh my gosh!” Bon Bon squealed. “Get out of here! You wrote Ponies be Jolly? That's hilarious!”
“No! No, it isn't!” Lyra said. “Bon Bon, I forbid you to find this funny!”
“Ponies be jolly, dance in a ring!” Bon Bon laughed as she sang the disgustingly catchy tune. “Snow all around and warmth within!”
“No, don't sing it!” Lyra moaned. “Anything but that!”
“All the little colts and fillies cheer! Hearth's Warming Eve is finally here!”
“Please stop.” Lyra buried her face in her hooves. “I beg you.”
To her great relief, the song quickly dissolved into wild giggles and Bon Bon collapsed unto her, resting her head in Lyra's lap. “Seriously? That isn't your style at all.”
“Well, I experimented a lot back then,” Lyra said. “Wrote all kinds of stuff. It wasn't really meant to be taken seriously, and I definitely didn't expect I'd have to hear it every single year since then. The money is nice, I suppose, but every winter I ask myself: Was it worth it? Was it worth unleashing that upon this innocent world?”
Bon Bon still giggled softly. “I admit that is pretty embarrassing, so we're even now.”
“Yeah right,” Lyra scoffed. “We're even when I say we're even.”
Feeling the soft curls of the earth pony's mane resting against her lap, all the tension from their argument gone, Lyra allowed herself to relax. Bon Bon was back in her usual good mood, a minor disaster had been averted, and the issue of Twilight Sparkle seemed to have been forgotten for now. Even so, she still felt a little bit troubled by the whole ordeal. Mainly because she hated lying to Bon Bon.
It hadn't been a complete lie, of course: Lyra really was the official creator of Ponies be Jolly. She often wished that wasn't the case, but found a small bit of comfort in the fact that she had taken no part in actually composing the dreadful thing.
“And just for the record,” Bon Bon said, “we were a black ops anti-monster unit, not spies. There's a difference.”
Lyra rolled her eyes. “If you say so.”
There was a loud knocking on the front door.
Bon Bon sat up. “Are we expecting somepony?”
“I don't think so,” Lyra said.
There was another series of knocks, firm and determined like the toll of a large bell.
The two ponies shared a puzzled look, then Lyra got to her hooves. “Well, better see what they want before they knock the door down.”
She opened the door and was taken aback when she found herself looking up at a large white pegasus in royal guard armor. “Ah... Good evening?”
“Is something the matter?” Bon Bon had left the sofa as well, and when she got a good look at their visitor she let out a small gasp of surprise. “Oh dear!”
“You are Lyra Heartstrings?” the guard asked, directing his full attention to Lyra.
“Me?” Lyra replied. “I mean, yes, I am. Can I help you?”
The guard raised his hoof, presenting a rolled-up paper scroll. “I bring a message to you from Princess Twilight Sparkle. You are to read it immediately.”
That's impossible, Lyra thought. “Um, okay?”
“Lyra, what is going on?” Bon Bon asked, looking a bit nervous now.
“I honestly have no idea,” Lyra said.
Levitating the scroll with her magic, she unrolled it and read the message. Her eyes went wide, and she had to read it a second time to make sure she hadn't imagined it. “What? But... No, that can't be...” She turned to the guard. “This has to be a mistake.”
“There is no mistake,” the guard stated flatly. “The princess personally entrusted me to deliver that scroll to you. I am to ensure that the directives within are carried out without fail.”
“What is it?” Bon Bon asked. “Don't tell me Twilight Sparkle finally hit you with a restraining order.”
“No,” Lyra mumbled, still staring at the scroll in disbelief. “Actually... she's invited me to dinner. Tonight.”
Bon Bon blinked. “She what?”
Lyra had to admit it was a pretty fun party. Everypony seemed to be enjoying themselves, with the exception of the actual guest of honor. Twilight had been appropriately surprised by Pinkie Pie's surprise party, but perhaps not in the way Pinkie had intended. Lyra felt a little bit bad for Twilight, even if the part with the hot sauce had been pretty funny.
She was ashamed to admit it, even just to herself, but it had been a relief when Twilight stormed off to the safety of the library's upper floor after less than a minute. The other guests didn't seem to mind, and the party carried on just the same. Lyra figured she might as well go with the flow for now.
As she helped herself to some of the complimentary soda and cupcakes, taking extra care to check them for hot sauce, a beige mare with mane full of colorful curls approached her. “I guess our new librarian isn't very interested in making friends, huh?”
“Oh, I don't know about that,” Lyra said with a mischievous smile. “I have a feeling she'll come around.”
“I hope so,” the mare said. “Pinkie can be kinda... intense when it comes to friendship, though she means well. I'm Bon Bon, by the way.”
“Lyra Heartstrings,” Lyra introduced herself. “But you can call me Lyra, everypony does. Pleased to meet you, Bon Bon.”
“I haven't seen you around before,” Bon Bon said. “I take it you're new in town as well?”
“Yeah, but keep it down, will you?” Lyra feigned a conspiratory whisper. “I don't think the pink one has figured that out yet.”
Bon Bon giggled. “Not a fan of parties, then?”
“Oh, I love them,” Lyra said. “But I think one is enough for tonight. Besides, I prefer to ease myself in gently, you know?”
Bon Bon gave her a warm smile. “Well, Lyra, if you need any help easing in, I'd be happy to show you around town tomorrow. If that's okay with you, I mean.”
“Yeah,” Lyra smiled back. “I think I'd like that.”
Lyra found herself standing in front of Twilight's castle, still trying to figure out how things had turned out the way they did.
At first she had tried to worm her way out of the invitation by pointing out she had nothing to wear, but the guard had made it clear that dressing was optional. Attendance, however, was not. He hadn't been kidding about making sure the summon was carried out. Even more annoying, Bon Bon quickly got over the initial surprise and had insisted Lyra go see Twilight. Though, perhaps she had just been eager to get that huge scowling stallion out of the house. The guard had then proceeded to march Lyra straight to the castle, as if concerned she would try to make a run for it if given the chance. Lyra couldn't deny she might have tried.
Still, the walk had given Lyra time to think things through and she had concluded that going along with this would probably be for the best. If Twilight Sparkle could notice her long enough to invite her to dinner, that meant something must have changed in a major way and whatever it was, Lyra knew she had to get to the bottom of it.
As the huge crystal tree palace towered in front of her, she turned to her escort. “I don't suppose you know what this is all about?”
“The princess is feeling lonely and desires company,” the guard stated, not even bothering to look at Lyra. “You are an acquaintance of her, are you not?”
“Sure,” Lyra said. “I mean, we're friends, I guess. This just seems a bit sudden.”
The guard ignored that comment and approached two nearly identical guards posted by the castle gates. “I have brought the guest.”
The two sentries responded with a simultaneous nod and opened the gates. Lyra stepped inside the great audience chamber, trying to ignore the feeling of unease still gnawing at her. The throne room was sparse but impressive, and for a moment Lyra found herself staring up at the enormous chandelier made out of tree roots, wondering who in Equestria put it there and how they did it. The sound of approaching hoofsteps made her look down and see Twilight Sparkle trot towards her with a big smile on her lips. “Lyra!”
“Hey, Twili...” Lyra suddenly found herself enveloped in a tight hug. “...Heh, um, glad to see you too.”
Twilight released her, still beaming. “It's been too long. It feels like I haven't seen you in ages! I'm so glad you could come over on such a short notice.”
“Well, I couldn't say no to dinner with a princess,” Lyra chuckled. She shrugged her head at the guard who had silently followed her inside. “Literally.”
Twilight's smile turned sheepish. “Oh, sorry about that. The boys are new to this and they can get a bit overzealous.” She faced the guard. “I think I can handle things on my own from here. You may leave us now.”
“As you wish, your Highness.” The guard bowed his head slightly. “I will be nearby should you need me again.”
Lyra almost sighed in relief as she watched him leave the room. She couldn't put her hoof on it, but something about that stallion just made her uncomfortable. “Geez, does Princess Celestia have those guys made in a lab or something?”
“Tell me about it,” Twilight giggled. “It's good to see you again, Lyra.”
Lyra felt some of her apprehension melt away from the warmth in Twilight's voice, and she allowed herself to relax a bit. “It's good to see you too, Twilight. Wow, look at you, wings and everything.”
“Heh, yeah,” Twilight wiggled her wings slightly. “They took some getting used to, but they come in handy. A lot of things have changed in my life, but I'm sure you know most of it already. And you? Still the same pony I knew back in school?”
“Pretty much.” Lyra struck a pose of exaggerated pride. “What can I say? Can't improve on perfection.”
“Yep, that's the same old Lyra, alright!” Twilight laughed and put a wing on Lyra's shoulder. “We have so much catching up to do. Come on, let's talk over dinner. I don't know about you, but I'm starving.”
“Yeah, I can eat,” Lyra said, allowing herself to be led out of the throne room by the princess.
Twilight brought her up a flight of stairs and into a corridor lined with more doors than Lyra had ever seen at once before. She quietly wondered what use Twilight could possibly have for that many rooms. “This place really is something. It looked a lot smaller on the outside.”
“I get that a lot,” Twilight said. “It's another one of those things I've had to get used to. I kinda still am, actually. Spike figured it out a lot faster, and half the time I have to ask him to help me get around. No worries, though, I'm pretty sure I remember the way to the dining hall.”
“So, where is the little guy, anyway?” Lyra asked. “You two were pretty inseparable back in Canterlot.”
Twilight seemed to hesitate for just a moment. “Ah, right. Spike got called away on royal business, so it's just us for now. It's a shame, I'm sure he would have liked to meet you again.”
“Well, when he gets back, maybe we can all hang out?” Lyra suggested.
“...Yeah, maybe.” Twilight suddenly stopped and opened one of the doors, seemingly identical to all the others. “Ah, here we are!”
The dining hall looked mostly the same as the castle's other crystal chambers, except for the large hardwood table serving as the centerpiece. It had been set with plates, tall drinking glasses and silverware for two, along with a number of lidded platters and trays. Magical lanterns along the walls shone with a warm light.
The moment Lyra entered the room, she sensed something: A faint charge of magic in the air, the sound of her hooves muting slightly. Had Twilight cast a spell on the room ahead of time? A silencing charm? Or perhaps... surveillance? The thought instantly reminded Lyra of the reason she had decided to visit Twilight in the first place, momentarily forgotten in the excitement of meeting an old friend. What am I doing? I can't afford to let my guard down!
After all, this meeting was never supposed to happen.
Twilight seemed to notice Lyra's reaction and turned to look at her. “Something wrong?”
“No, not at all,” Lyra shook her head. “Whatever you've cooked up, it sure smells lovely.” That was true: A pleasant, mouth-watering aroma filled the room and Lyra realized she really was quite hungry.
“Doesn't it?” Twilight lit her horn up and lifted the lids off the platters all at once. Lyra stared in awe at the feast in front of her as those wonderful smells hit her with full force.
The main course turned out to be Portobello mushrooms grilled to a golden-brown, drizzled with butter and stuffed with white cheese, spinach, sun-dried red tomatoes and zucchini. They had been cooked in a white wine and mustard sauce and topped with shredded chives. Nearby sat a tureen of vegetable consomme that smelled of fresh garlic, juniper and nutmeg. Large golden Semolina dumplings floated on the surface.
Next there was a dish of fresh salad with purple potato, Chantanay carrots, limes, red chili, baby cucumber, spring onion, cherry tomato, and many other wonderful things that made Lyra's mouth water, all of it glazed in balsamic vinegar and sprinkled with black pepper and sea salt. Another dish held roasted vegetables: turnips, beetroots, fennel, celery bell peppers, whole garlic, pearl onions, parsnips and more mushrooms, glistening with olive oil and seasoned with chopped parsley, bay leaf and thyme.
To drink, there were four bottles of wine on the table, each intended for the individual dishes: a red Cabernet Sauvignon for the mushrooms, white Grüner Veltliner for the salad, Pinot Gris for the vegetables, and finally a Beaujolais Crus for the soup. All of them seemed to be good years, too.
“Wow,” Lyra chuckled. “Um, what's the occasion?”
“You are, silly,” Twilight took a seat and gestured to Lyra to do the same. “Go on, dig in. I trust you still have your old appetite, because there's no way I can finish all this by myself.”
“We can't have that, can we?” Lyra sat down and used her own magic to fill her plate. She wasted no time to take a bite out of her mushroom and her eyes widened as the flavor filled her mouth. “Oh my goodness. This is amazing.”
“It's nice, I suppose.” Twilight looked thoughtful as she chewed on her own morsel. “Maybe a bit... extravagant for my taste. It's not like I invited you here just to impress you. Normally I would have simply asked Applejack to prepare something for us. Her cooking may not be that fancy, but she always puts in that little extra bit of effort that makes up for it. But since she isn't in town tonight I had to hire a professional caterer instead. They may have gotten a bit carried away when they found out I'm the local princess.”
“Hey, I'm not complaining!” Lyra had to struggle to slow down her eating long enough to carry on the conversation. “...I know what you mean, though. Bon Bon's cooking isn't what I would call extravagant either, but I can't get enough of it.”
“I guess food just tastes better when made by somepony who really cares about you.” There was a slight tone of melancholy in Twilight's voice. She ate with a passive expression, as if her food tasted nothing.
“Yeah...” Lyra was sure of it now: Something was bothering Twilight, though she did a good job of hiding it. “So, are all your friends out of town? That guard dude said you were feeling... lonely?”
“I guess.” Twilight stopped eating altogether, poking her food slightly as she spoke. “Strange, isn't it? I used to be alone all the time, after all. Back at school, I was usually too busy studying to pay attention to the ponies around me. So, you'd think I'd be used to it. I guess it's only now I understand how important it is to have reliable friends by my side. Fortunately, I realized that I still have one friend left in Ponyville, and sometimes that makes all the difference. That's why I invited you here.” She looked up and smiled. “Did it surprise you?”
“A little bit,” Lyra admitted. “I mean, it has been quite a while since we hung out. Don't take this the wrong way now, but I kinda thought you'd forgotten about me.”
“To be honest, I actually did,” Twilight said, her smile fading. “It's the strangest thing. A while back Spike reminded me I hadn't kept in touch with my old friends from Canterlot, so I decided to pay them a visit. It's really embarrassing, but I barely even recalled their names and needed Spike to write them down for me, yours included. Some Princess of Friendship, huh?”
“Well, you always did get really absorbed in your studies,” Lyra said. “We figured you'd been busy since you moved here. Especially now, you know, with all the princess stuff.”
“I suppose, but that's no excuse.” Twilight sighed. “Anyway, when I met up with the girls again, they mentioned that you lived in Ponyville these days. That surprised me, because I couldn't recall seeing you even once. Then a lot of things happened and somehow it just slipped my mind all over again. It seems that ever since I came to this town, I've had this unfortunate tendency to forget you. But you already know about all of this, don't you, Lyra Heartstrings?” Twilight's eyes narrowed slightly. “Or... should I call you IP-002?”
Lyra skillfully avoided choking on her food. She swallowed, slowly lowered her fork and gave the princess an even look while quickly considering her options. They were distressingly limited.
“If you know that much,” she said, “then you also know that this is the part where I'm supposed to have no idea what you're talking about.”
“True,” Twilight said, “but I think we both know that it would save some time if we just skip that part.”
Lyra kept her expression neutral but raised her eyebrow at the very slight stress on the words 'save some time'. So, Twilight had no time to waste on games, yet seemed to take great care in keeping the conversation casual.
Something was wrong.
With nothing else to go by, Lyra decided to play along. “So how much do you already know?”
“Well, not as much as I'd like,” Twilight replied. “I'd heard about the Incidentals, of course, but it was mostly just unsubstantiated rumors and crackpot conspiracy theories. It's practically impossible to find any evidence of your organization actually existing.”
“Officially, we don't,” Lyra said. “That's sorta the whole point of the Incidentals: We are very good at not existing. Frankly, you shouldn't have been able to notice me at all, even if you looked right at me.” She tried not to sound too annoyed about that last part.
Twilight shrugged. “I didn't, for the most part. Still, I'd catch glimpses of you from time to time and I kept getting this nagging feeling in the back of my head that I should remember you from somewhere. It just kept slipping away from me, like I couldn't hold on to the thought. It wasn't until our old friends mentioned you living here that I realized something was definitely off, and it got even weirder when I found out you'd moved here the same day I did. I may have forgotten to keep in touch with the girls in Canterlot, but I couldn't possibly have missed that. So I began digging into those rumors about the Incidentals, and then everything started to make sense. Once I realized you were using some kind of memory manipulating spell to cloak yourself, I could figure out a way to counter it.” She giggled. “It was pretty tricky, though. Took me all day.”
It better have, Lyra thought. It was made by some of the best spellwrights in Equestria, and most of them don't even remember doing it. But then, that was Celestia's prize pupil for you.
Twilight cocked her head, frowning somewhat. “I do wish Celestia had told me I had a secret bodyguard hiding in plain sight, but I suppose all this cloak and dagger stuff is convenient in its own way. After all, if nopony can notice you unless you let them, our enemies can't consider you a factor in their plans.” She looked straight at Lyra. “So, for example, if Princess Celestia suddenly started acting strangely, and all my friends just happened to 'leave town' at the same time without telling me first, and a mysterious guard retinue I never asked for showed up to 'protect' me, then inviting an old schoolmate to dinner and some long overdue catching up wouldn't seem too conspicuous.”
Aaah.
Suddenly on high alert, Lyra instinctively let her eyes sweep across the room, taking note of all potential entry points. She wanted to hit herself: How could she have missed this? She had already seen all the signs. “How long do we have?”
“They're probably already catching on,” Twilight replied in a hushed voice. “I'm sorry, Lyra, I wish you didn't have to get involved but...”
Lyra just shook her head. “No, you did the right thing. This is my job, after all.” Her ears twitched, picking up the distant echoes of bronze horseshoes against crystal floors. The castle wasn't safe.
“Say, Twilight!” she said in a loud, cheerful voice. “Why don't you show me your library? I recall you promised to let me borrow your copy of Doctor Strange Fate's treaty on the Flashstone of Squirk, but then you ran off to save the world or something.”
“Ah... Yes!” Twilight stood up a little too quickly. “I suppose I owe you that much. Um, come on, the library is right this way.”
They left the dining room through a door opposite the one they'd entered through, stepping out into a long hallway. Maybe it was just Lyra's imagination, but the castle seemed somehow darker and colder than before. “We can't stay here,” she whispered to Twilight. “The entrance will be guarded. Is there another way out?”
“There's a back door through the kitchen,” Twilight whispered back. “If we're lucky, they're not watching it too closely.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Lyra said. “Walk slowly and try to stay calm. If we make a run for it now, they'll know the gig is up.”
Twilight nodded and they walked slowly down the hallway, all too aware of their hoofs echoing against the crystal. Twilight sighed. “...For what it's worth, I wish we could have met again under better circumstances.”
“Me too.” Lyra glanced at the princess with a sad smile on her lips. “It was hard, you know? Spending every day watching you, seeing you grow and make new friends, knowing... that you'd never even recognize me.”
Twilight bit her lip. “Lyra...”
“Shh!” Lyra stopped them both in their tracks. Further down the hallway, they could hear hoofsteps coming towards them and dark shadows appeared from behind a corner. “Dammit.”
“In here!” Twilight hissed, opening a nearby door. With no time to hesitate, they dove into the room beyond and closed the door behind them.
It was in fact the library, the walls completely lined with shelves filled with hundreds of immaculately sorted books. Despite their predicament, Lyra had to stop for a moment and admire Twilight's collection – she hadn't seen that many books in one place since their days at the Academy. She felt a twinge of regret: Discussing the finer points of arcane literature with Twilight would have been nice, but there was no time for that now.
Lighting up her horn, she levitated a large bookshelf and propped it up against the door. “That should hold them, at least for a while.”
She had barely finished her sentence when a hard knocking was heard from behind the improvised barricade. “Princess Twilight!” came a stern voice from the other side. “Please let us in.”
“Just a moment!” Twilight called back. “Sorry, the door seems to be stuck. Just wait outside and I'll be right out.”
The knocking didn't cease. In fact, it grew louder and more violent. The other sounds changed as well: Hoofsteps became heavy stomps, and the voices turned into deep growls. The bookshelf began to tremble and behind it they could hear the crystal door starting to crack.
“Well, that's not good.” Lyra turned to the princess. “I hope you have a plan for getting us out of here.”
“The room right below us is just by the kitchen,” Twilight explained. “Hang on, I'll..."
Lyra lit her horn and there was a bright flash of yellow light. The next moment they were both standing in a different room. Above their heads, they could hear the sound of a bookshelf crashing to the floor as a door was broken down by something large and irate.
Twilight blinked. “...teleport us. Wow, we really do need to catch up.”
Lyra shot her a grin. “Later. Come on, we've thrown them off our tracks. This is our chance to make a run for it.”
“Once we're out of the castle, then what?”
“We'll need backup.” Lyra scratched her chin. “Somepony we can trust. Somepony resourceful. Somepony trained to deal with weird monster stuff.” She suddenly chuckled. “Fortunately, I know just the pony for the job.”
Oh, the look on Bon Bon's face would be priceless. How's that for even?
They hurried through the kitchen, the alicorn leading the way with the unicorn just one step behind. They were almost at the secondary entrance where food and other essentials would have been brought in, had the castle been fully staffed. In front of them, two large shadowy shapes turned their heads, ruby eyes widening in surprise. As one, the two ponies flared their horns.
“Lyra,” Twilight said, “I'm glad to have you as a friend.”
Lyra Heartstrings smiled, her muscles tensing for the charge.
“Thank you for remembering me.”
Author's Note
I actually thought of this story way before Slice of Life came along, but as usual it takes way too long for me to write anything. New canon can be a bit of a double edged sword, but over all I think this still turned out pretty well.
Great thanks go to Mr and Mrs AskAPirate, for helping me with the cover, and Alsvid, who was instrumental in helping me complete the dinner scene.
