HearthPone

by Emerald-Aegis

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Crossover, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2450

Discord decides to bring a game he likes, to Equestria; with a few additions of his own.

In a time of peace in Equestria, it falls to everypony's favourite God of Chaos to stir things up a bit. But not in the way you'd expect.

Digging into another Dimension, Discord has introduced a game to Equestria, in his own design. HearthPone! Battle your friends, collect cards, and try to not know Discord enough that he makes a card or two of you!

Who will be Equestria's HearthPone Champion?

[I claim no Copyright of Hearthstone. It is owned by Blizzard Entertainment]
[Cover art by GeneralThunderbat, used with their permission :pinkiehappy:]

Published 2016-04-29 00:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-04-29 00:10:01 UTC

Patch Day

The town of Ponyville was warm in the summertime. The breeze was cool, ponies were playing about in the park, and all was bright and-

"WHAT?! You Alarm-o-Botted DEATHWING?!"

Huh?

"Yep! Heheh. See why I love this deck?"
"It's turn Two! I haven't even played a minion yet!"

Um… *ahem* All was… kind of calm, in Ponyville… save for the screams of a particular Pegasus just across the way, sat on a park bench beside her pink friend; both sat back to back with eachother, staring down at a large square device. It's centre form seemed almost… translucent; with strange moving images upon it, while its corners seemed to hold its almost holographic form.

"What are the odds of you having Innervate, Alarm-o-Bot AND Deathwing on TURN TWO?!" The Rainbow maned Pegasus questioned over her shoulder, an exasperated look upon her face.
Pinkie tapped her hoof to her chin, mumble a few times.
"Um… Odds of having three specific cards is One over thirty, times One over twenty nine, times One over twenty eight… I had the cards in my starting hand, so… One in Twenty Four thousand, three hundred and sixty!" She squeed, dealing one damage from her Hero power, ending her turn with a tap of the aptly named 'End Turn' button.
Rainbow grumbled, turning back to her screen.
"Come on Rainbow… you can handle this… just draw some taunts."
The card flew from the deck into Rainbow's hand. She groaned, bowing her head disgruntled at the sorry look of the newly Nerfed Leper Gnome.
"I forgot to re-fix my deck…"
"Well, sorry Dashie! Should've kept up with the patch notes."

Her eyes darted over her cards. She had two mana crystals and Pinkie had already managed to get a 12/12 onto the board. Not to mention that the new Dragonlord card was immensely powerful in Pinkie's new Dragon Druid deck.
Rainbow sighed. She played the measly Leper Gnome and ended her turn.
"I've lost this already…"
"Aww come on Dashie. Maybe the card's will be nice! Believe in the Heart of the Cards!" A hoof raised into the air behind Dash for a moment, before dropping back to the screen. The ring of the Alarm-o-bot went out once more, and a nice twelve Damage to Rainbow Dash.
Dash watched half heartedly as she drew yet another pathetic excuse of a card. Indeed, the heart of the cards knew that the great power of a River Crocolisk would vanquish the mighty Dragonlord.
She watched as the Alarm rang.
The Dragon of Dreams falling to the deck.

"OH COME ONE!! IT'S TURN FOUR, FOR CELESTIA'S SAKE!"

Ahh yes… Equestria had been enjoying it's grand new craze, 'HearthPone'; ever since his Chaosness decided to spice up the lives of Equestrian kind. Strange devices from a far off land and the new card game that was taking the land by storm.
Discord had even created some cards of his own, and put them into the game.
But ugh… more than likely, we'll be mentioning them later.

But, yes; Ponyville was calm and bright as ever on this fine-
"I LOST ON TURN FIVE, THIS IS GARBAGE!"
OKAY RAINBOW.
Thank you… we get it, Pinkie kicked your flank…
Yeesh, Alarm-o-bot turn one into Dragonlord Deathwing, nice play Pinkie.

====================

*ahem* As I was saying. Off into the rest of town, the new day was offering fresh prospects for its ponies. A bright new day, and bright new-

"YES!"

Oh for Celestia's sake, what now?
*sigh* Twilight's Castle…
The purple princess sat in her seat, looking down at her similar square holographic pad… thingy, gazing with a smile at the five cards flipped over before her.
Three were random cards she had disenchanted over a million times, one was a rare card that she had more than likely disenchanted as well.
But Lo.
The great Golden Yogg'saron.
The Alicorn hopped out of her seat, jumping around with a big smile on her face.
"Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes! Golden Yogg! WOO!"
Why can't I get a golden Legendary…
Anyway, the princess ran back into her seat, and began tapping the screen; going into her decks and swapping out the Yogg'saron in her Mage deck, for the bright shiny Golden one.

Numerous papers and calculations were scattered around the table. Important princess work? Dutiful applications of her role? New prospects to discover?
Bugger no!
Calculations for the perfect Mage deck, of course.
Mana costs, spell effects, intertwinings of cards, applications. All re-written and re-designed for the new cards.
"Now my Golden Spell Mage is complete! Heheh! Ooh, I wonder if Pinkie wants to test it out."

Wai- we're going back to Pinkie?
*sigh*
Hey! No one told me I was playing COMMENTATOR for this one, not Narrator!
What?
…
Oh fine…
*ahem*
Well folks, it seems like this story's gonna be described in it's great detail by myself, and I will be doing my best to fuel your Hearthstony needs!
… And Pony needs, but… you get the idea.
Casting her magic over opposite corners of the device, the holographic screen faded as the square shrunk into a much smaller size. Twilight smiled as she trotted towards the door with the tablet in magic, leaving the notes aside. On one of the pieces of paper, were a few familiar faces… some of which had been crumpled up…

====================

Ah good, we're back outside! Will the script let me do my job as a Narrator? We'll see I guess.

Twilight Sparkle trotted happily down the streets of Ponyville, the cobblestones beneath her hooves clattering at each hoof step. She smiled to the residents as she passed through the town, offering them a wave now and then.
The air was warm upon her fur, yet not too warm to be uncomfortable. Possibly one of the best days of the season. The Pegasi had truly outdone themselves on this fine day, and it was rather surprising that Rainbow Dash wasn't utilising it to its fullest potential… by sleeping.

Twilight made her way into the park, casting her gaze about to spy her friends. It wasn't long, before-
"OH COME ON!!"
… Yep… yeah I'm not gonna be able to do a chapter, am I…
*sigh*
Twilight turned her head towards the cry. With a light chuckle, she wandered towards it, spying a disgruntled Rainbow Dash trying to fathom the situation before her.
It was turn 7. The health was 16 to 24, with Rainbow holding the board with not much more than a Voidwalker, and a weakened Flame Imp. Pinkie however, was already dominating the board a 3/3 taunt, a… pfft, a 16/16 Lightspawn, and a Lightwell.
"Heheh! Sorry Dashie, that's the RNG of the game ~"
"You could've got that Deathrattle on the Lightwell for all I care, why THAT THING!?"
"RNG!" The pink pony grinned out; running the taunt into the Voidwalker, and then bringing the game home. "Not that it would've mattered. As long as it wasn't my Orc."
Throwing her hooves up in the air, Rainbow closed the device and let it sit on her wings as she lay down on the bench.
"I give up…"
Pinkie turned to look at the Pegasus.
"Aww come on Dashie. Wanna try against my new Demo-lock?"

"I'll give it a try!" Called an alternative voice from the side. Both mares turned their gazes to the voice, smiling as Twilight wandered towards them.
"Heya Twilight. How you finding the new cards?"
"Great! You'll never guess what I got out of my last pack!" Her smile turned wide. "A golden Yogg'saron!"
"Ooooooh." Both mares hummed in awe of the grand new card.
"Wait." Halted the pink pony. "Does that mean your new Mage deck is ALL golden?" She dragged out the 'All', her forelegs stretching outward widely.
"Heheh. Well, I don't like to brag, but…"
Yes, she has a golden Mage deck…
"Oh oh! Can I play! I wanna try out my Shammy!"
With a roll of her eyes, Rainbow tucked her tablet away and rolled onto her back. "Yeah, we know why you wanna try your Shammy. It's cos your favourite card got buffed."
With a squee, Pinkie grabbed her tablet.

"Actually Rainbow, it depends on how you view it."
Rainbow glanced to the bookworm, who was eyeing up a card on her tablet. "Yes, it gained another attack point, but it also gained another Overload."
"Twi, it has Windfury and Divine Shield. It's worth two Overload."
A shrug came about the Alicorn's shoulder as she sat opposite her pink opponent. With a competitive grin, they tapped their screens, the duel beginning.

====================

Turn 5 was quickly brought about. Twilight eyed her hand carefully, calculating every possible move in her head before even daring to budge a muscle. The board was fairly even, and Twilight had the advantage of three more health.
Rainbow Dash knew what Twilight was contemplating. It was turn Five against Pinkie's Shaman Deck, there was one very special card that was potentially game breaking. Twilight had ways to counter it, but they weren't in her hand.
An Arcane Intellect, a Mana Wyrm, a Mana Addict, Coin, and her ace. The ace she couldn't use until turn eight.
She had to pray.
She took a slow breath, and played the Arcane Intellect. She needed one of three cards.
First draw… Arcane Missiles. Nice, but not what she wanted.
Second draw………
Yes. Yes! There it was!
Doing her best to keep her cool, and not give away her excitement, Twilight slowly played coin, and her secret; ending her turn shortly after.
She knew Pinkie Pie. If she had the card, she would play it. With all her secrets costing three, Pinkie had no way of knowing what she had played… though if the Party Pony knew Twilight, she could put it down to one of three cards.
Knowing which though…
Pinkie drew. She turned her gaze up to Twilight with a smirk.
Twilight was right. She had it.
"Well Twilight, you know what they say."
Dragging her hoof on a card, she dragged it into play. A Party Cannon rolled onto the screen; shooting Confetti out over the board as the card within called out.

"Let's get this Party Started!"

Then the sound. That shing of Magic, the secret playing.
Mirror Entity.
"Yes Pinkie, I do know what they say."

"Let's get this Party Started!"

"Ooh! Nice play Twilight! I wasn't sure if you'd gone Vaporise, Mirror Entity or Duplicate."
"She could've played Effigy."
Pink and Purple turned their heads towards Blue, raising an eyebrow curiously at her. Rainbow's eyes gazed from one to the other, feeling unsure of their looks.
"… What?"
"Why would she play Effigy? She has a three and a two on board… Mirror Entity's much better."
"Yeah Rainbow, it means I get to play the card outside of my class, AND I don't get the Overload. Although Vaporise would've been good too, but… I get the feeling you would've lost your Totem before YOUR card." Twilight chuckled.
Rainbow rolled her eyes, watching the game again.
With Pinkie's minion's sacrificing them to take down Twilight's, the board was left with the twin party ponies.
Twilight's Turn. She had a choice to make. She could sacrifice the Pinkie AND its Deathrattle, and then play. Alternatively, she had the potential to get a nice eight damage off.
Although…
Twilight nodded to herself. She drew, a very nice Sorcerer's Apprentice. She smirked, playing the little gnome; sending the Pinkie to attack her counterpart.
"Wahoo!"
The Divine Shields popped.
"Wahoo!"
Both mares died. But then, the Deathrattles…
Pinkie hated the Deathrattle of the card, and actively went out of her way to silence her own minion sometimes, just so she didn't have to see the Deathrattle. Not to say it was a BAD Deathrattle, but…

"Wanna help me make some Cupcakes?"

Pinkie shuddered as the cards appeared on screen, ripping their way from the floor in an… uncomfortable shadow.
"Why did Discord have to put these kinda cards in… they creep me out…"
"The notes said that they're part of the Hearthstone lore… unsure WHERE, but I'm not gonna question one of Discord's points…" Twilight sighed out, glancing over her cards.
Playing the Mana Wyrm, and then the Arcane Missiles, Twilight let the RNG decide her next move. She still had three mana left…
First Missile… Face.
Second Missile… Face.
Third Missile… Pinkamena.
She only needed one. Twilight smirked, casting her Hero power at Pinkamena, the uneasy scream of the card's death echoing through Pinkie's head.
Charging face with a resounding dark chuckle, Twilight ended her turn.

The next few turns passed fast, Pinkie quickly opting to destroy her 'Counterpart' with a Lightning Bolt the turn after. Twilight couldn't blame the mare; when some of the 'Alternative' cards were introduced, many of them were met with disdain… regardless of their very nice abilities.

Turn Ten. Health was 13/8, with Pinkie holding Board strength with totems, but Twilight's Sorcerer's Apprentice still alive… barely.
It was time for Twilight's Ace.

"I'm ready to Learn!"

The card materialised onto the board in a flash of Purple magic, a set of ethereal wings dissipating from the sides of the card. With a cast of her Hero Power at Pinkie's Searing Totem, she awaited the card; once more leaving fate out of her hooves.

"Wheel of RNG, turn turn turn, tell us the Card that Twilight might burn!" Pinkie cheered, awaiting the move.

The wheel, as it was, stopped. With a drop of 3-mana in cost, the card had the potential to win the game…

Roaring Torch.
She'd won.

Twilight smiled, having her hero let out a merry 'Well Played', before casting the Roaring Torch to Pinkie's face, and then having her Sorcerer's Apprentice follow suit.
"Heheh. Good game Pinkie. You almost had me with that Totemcarver."
"You spell mages got it really good this expansion! It's a shame I didn't get to see Golden Yoggy though."
Twilight chuckled.
"Maybe next time. Rainbow, do you want Win-"
Her eyes turned to the Pegasus, who was seemingly sat upon the bench; snoring into its back.
"I'll… take that as a no. Heheh. Another game, Pinkie?"
"Oh oh! Yeah! I have a new Hunter deck I wanna try out!"

Author's Note

Yeah it's silly, yeah it's dumb, and yeah I'm a dork; but meh. :rainbowwild:

A stupid little idea when I had a small binge of designing some Hearthstone Codes for our favourite Pones. A friend helped me with their designs, and use. Calculations by myself. Cos Maths let's you do that. :pinkiecrazy:

If people like it, I might write some more. :rainbowlaugh: