Cheer Princess

by MythrilMoth

Rating: teen
Tags: Principal Celestia, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Alternate Universe, Vice-Principal Luna, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Equestria Girls, Sex, Sunset Shimmer
Length: 58728

After following Sunset Shimmer through the portal and becoming stuck in the human world, Princess Celestia struggles to adapt while blocking Sunset's ambitions with her own popularity.

She didn't think. She just jumped through the portal.

Then it closed behind her.

Stuck in the body of a human teenager, Princess Celestia finds herself trapped in the same world as her bitter student. Even as she and Sunset Shimmer both work to adapt to their new environment and bodies, Celestia is faced with an additional challenge: Sunset Shimmer is attempting to become the queen of Canterlot High, and the only way Celestia can fight back is...

...by becoming more popular.

(Book One preread by DrakeyC and Zef.)

Published 2016-05-04 22:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2018-08-09 01:49:02 UTC

Book One, Prologue (Side Celestia)

Author's Note

This is just a little idea that popped into my head the other day, and I just had to play with a bit to see if it'll go anywhere. Mostly inspired by the cover art, of course. :heart:

Book One, Prologue (Side Celestia)

She didn't think. She just jumped through the portal.

Dimly, she was aware of the guards crying out behind her. She ignored them. Her only thought was the amber unicorn with the fiery mane and the Cutie Mark which was so similar to her own. Her student. Her proudest achievement in many years.

Her greatest failure in many centuries.

*No. I will not fail you, Sunset Shimmer. I will not have another Nightmare Moon on my conscience.*

Colors swirled around her, and she felt her body shift, swirl, come apart, reassemble. It was a sensation she was familiar with from her long experience travelling from world to world with Starswirl.

She emerged from the bright tunnel of kaleidoscope colors into a dark, cool night. A light breeze brushed across her bare arms, raising goosebumps. She staggered for a moment as her body adjusted to its new center of gravity.

*Biped. Non-hooved species. Human, I think it was called? No magic, no wings.*

"Well, well, this is an interesting development," a familiar voice said from nearby.

A few feet away, a girl stood with her back to Celestia. She wore black boots, a short orange skirt, and a black jacket. Waves of copper and gold hair cascaded down her back, and her bare hands and thighs were a fair peach-amber color.

"Sunset Shimmer, please! You must come back!" Celestia called.

Sunset turned, her teal eyes wide in surprise. "So you followed me," she said. "Why bother? We're through, remember? I'm no longer your student!"

"I was angry!" Celestia cried in despair, unconsciously clenching her new hands into fists at her sides. "I made a mistake! I..." She bowed her head. "Sunset, please...I don't want it to end like this. Not...not again. I've made this mistake before, I—"

With a whoosh of wind and a flash of light, the portal closed behind her.

Celestia's eyes widened. She turned and ran to the statue, pressing her hands against its smooth marble surface. "No," she whispered. "No..."

Sunset laughed. "Looks like I won't be going back to Equestria after all!" she exclaimed. "And neither will you, Princess! Not for another thirty moons!"

Celestia slid slowly down the statue, her forehead pressed against the cold stone. "No," she repeated.

"I think I'll just leave you here to cry and whine while I see what this world has to offer," Sunset sneered.

"Sunset, wait—!" Celestia began, rising to her feet as quickly as she could and turning around, reaching out a hand.

Sunset ignored her, running away into the night. Celestia chased after her, but was forced to stop when a large metal carriage rolled to a stop in her path, roaring like an angry manticore. Celestia fell to the ground just short of the carriage, landing on all fours; the pavement stung her palms and her knees, and her breath came in heavy, ragged gasps.

"Are you alright?" a hauntingly familiar voice asked. Celestia looked up; a window had opened in the metal carriage, and a human woman with light blue skin and wavy midnight-blue hair peered out at her with dark opal eyes.

"I...I think so," Celestia said. She slowly stood up, placing a hand over her hammering heart and taking a slow, deep breath. "I need to stop her...Sunset Shimmer..."

The woman in the carriage tilted her head. "Are you talking about the girl in the leather jacket that just ran past? Is she a friend of yours?"

"She is my student. Or was."

The woman raised an eyebrow. "Student? But...you don't look any older than she is. I mean, you're both teenagers."

Celestia blinked. "Teenagers...?"

Suddenly, the woman gasped, leaning further out of her window. Her carriage lurched forward; she did something out of Celestia's sight, and it jerked to a halt. "Tia?!"

Celestia frowned. "Do I...do I know you?"

The woman shook her head. "No, I'm...I'm seeing things," she said distractedly.

Celestia studied the woman. There was something disturbingly familiar about her, like an old memory tickling at the back of her mind. She straightened the white dress she wore, then looked past the carriage. There was no sign of Sunset Shimmer. She sighed. "She's gone..."

The woman in the carriage gave her a troubled frown. "Can...can I offer you a ride anywhere?"

Celestia swallowed. "I...I don't have anywhere to go," she admitted. "I'm not from around here."

The woman frowned. "Hmm. An orphan, or perhaps a runaway?"

"A...foreigner," Celestia hedged. "I'm lost and have no way to return home."

The woman in the carriage sighed. "Well, a girl your age really shouldn't be running around in the streets this time of night. If you don't have a place to stay, I suppose I could let you spend the night at my place."

Celestia considered that. "I—"

"I assure you, it's safer and warmer than being out here in the streets," the woman said. "As hot as it gets in the daytime this time of year, the nights are still quite chilly, especially when you're dressed like that. That's to say nothing of, well..." She trailed off.

Celestia frowned. "There are...dangerous individuals who lurk in the darkness?"

"You could say that," the woman said mildly.

"Then I really need to find Sunset Shimmer without delay," Celestia said.

The woman grimaced. "Do you even know where she might have gone?"

Celestia blinked, then sighed. "No," she admitted. "She is as lost here as I am."

"Then the best thing you can do right now is take care of yourself," the woman said. "I'm more than happy to let you spend the night at my house, but tomorrow I'll need to take you to the police so they can try to help you. They can also find your friend, if they haven't already found her by morning. Come on, get in."

Celestia eyed the carriage warily. The woman watched her. After a moment, she frowned, jerking her head to the opposite side of the carriage. "You getting in or what?" she asked impatiently.

Celestia walked around the carriage, examining it curiously, feeling a hot wind from its rear stir the hem of her dress as she passed behind it. When she reached the opposite side, she studied the metal wall of the vehicle. There was a handle set into the door. She tried lifting it, and the door opened. Mentally taking note of this, she slid into the plush seat, pulling the door closed behind her.

"Seat belt," the woman said.

"Pardon?"

The woman tugged at the fabric strap which lay across her own chest, then motioned to something over her left shoulder. "This can't be your first time in a car," she said disbelievingly.

"Actually, it is." Celestia looked to her right and found a shiny bit of metal, which she took hold of and pulled. A similar fabric strap pulled loose from the wall of the carriage; she fumbled around with her left hand until she found something that felt like it probably connected to the strap. After a bit of effort, she heard a sharp click, and the strap secured in place.

"Good, all buckled up!" The woman chuckled; the carriage began to move. "By the way, my name is Luna. I'm the Vice Principal of Canterlot High School."

Celestia's heart nearly stopped. "L-LUNA?!"

"That's Miss Luna to you, young lady," Luna said. She glanced to her right...then nearly ran the carriage off the road. The vehicle jerked to a sudden stop, and Luna turned to fully face Celestia. "Oh my god," she breathed. "You...you really do look exactly like my sister Celestia."

"Sister...?" Celestia said slowly, eyes wide.

"What's your name?" Luna asked insistently.

"My name is...my name is Celestia," Celestia said numbly.

"No, seriously, what's your name?" Luna asked again.

"I'm telling you, my name is Celestia!" She looked away. "And...and I had a sister named Luna...a very long time ago."

"What happened to her?"

Celestia shook her head. "I'd...rather not talk about it."

Luna pursed her lips, her brow furrowed in thought. With a small grunt, she set the carriage in motion again. "So, why were you chasing that other girl? Did she steal something from you?"

"Huh? Oh...no," Celestia said. "I...I made a mistake. I was angry with her for disobeying me, and I banished her from my castle."

"Castle?" Luna asked with a chuckle. "What, are you a princess or something?"

"Actually, yes," Celestia said.

Luna glanced at her for a moment, then laughed. "Oh, I get it," she said. "You're talking about an online game. She's in your guild or something and you had a fight and you kicked her out, right?"

Celestia blinked. "Umm..." *I didn't understand a single word of that.*

"Yeah, I've had that happen a few times," Luna said, her eyes back on the road. "Internet drama, it's a real bitch." After a moment, she asked, "So what school do you go to?"

"School?" Celestia asked. "No, I—I don't go to school."

Luna frowned. "A dropout, huh? Can't say I approve of that."

"No, I—" Celestia paused. *If I try to tell her I'm the ruler of an entire nation, she'll probably think I'm insane.* "I, umm...finished school a long time ago."

Luna groaned. "Ugh. One of those. Kid prodigies...never liked 'em. They make me feel stupid. We had a kid come into CHS a few years ago who was nine. Nine! Graduated before he turned twelve. Little brat."

"May I ask a question?" At Luna's nod, Celestia said, "This place...what is it? This city."

Luna snorted. "You don't even know what city you're in? Seriously?" She glanced at Celestia, whose eyes were sincere and upset. She sighed. "Canterlot. This is Canterlot. The Ponyville suburb, specifically."

*Canterlot...Ponyville.* Celestia's brow furrowed as her mind began racing. "So Baltimare would be northeast, Las Pegasus far to the west, and Seaddle on the northwest coast? And Manehattan on the northeast coast, by the sea?"

"That's right," Luna said. "Congratulations, you know basic geography."

"And...and the name of this kingdom. What is it?"

Luna barked out a laugh. "Kingdom?!" She shook her head, chuckling. "This is the United States of Cavallonia. We haven't had a king in over two hundred years."

Celestia tilted her head. "A republic?"

"Democratic republic, yes," Luna said. She coasted to a stop at a red light and spared Celestia another glance. "You sound surprised. You're...you're not kidding about not being from around here, are you?"

Celestia decided to take a risk. "No. I'm from the Kingdom of Equestria."

"Never heard of it," Luna said. "Is it in Ewerope?"

"No, it's—nevermind. It's not important." Celestia's mind raced as she sorted the bits of information she'd gleaned from Luna.

*This world...it's clearly a parallel Equestria. That would explain why the humans living here have such...ungulate names for their nations and cities. Then this must truly be the parallel of my own sister. But there's so many things that don't make sense...*

"How about some music?" Luna fiddled with something on the console in front of her, and a wall of noise assaulted Celestia. It sounded similar to the rock and roll she'd heard a few times in Equestria, only harder and louder.

Several minutes later, the vehicle slowed, turning into a shorter stretch of pavement that led up to a medium-sized house whose outside lights were on. Celestia studied the house absently; in the dark, she couldn't make out many details, but there were trees in the yard and hedges here and there. The rumbling of the carriage ceased, as did the loud music.

"Alright, this is the house my sister and I share...and she does not appear to be home yet." Luna's lips thinned. "You'll be staying with us tonight at the very least, but...I find myself very curious as to why you have the same name as my sister, not to mention why you look so much like she did when we were teenagers."

"Ahh..." Celestia hedged. "I'm...starting to get an idea of what's going on here, but I don't think you'd believe me if I told you."

Luna grunted, but got out of the carriage; Celestia removed her seat belt and did likewise. She followed the woman who bore her sister's name—but looked so very little like her—to the side of the house, where Luna unlatched a simple wooden gate and opened it before unlocking a small door set into the back of the house. Celestia followed her in, looking curiously around as a series of overhead lights flickered on.

The house was full of things Celestia didn't recognize, as well as some she did. There were large, boxy chunks of metal in the room they'd entered, over which sat wooden cupboards. Through a door, they walked into a room full of countertops, steel sinks, and more chunky metal things—one of which Celestia recognized as an oven, and another which looked like a refrigerator. There were others she couldn't place, but it was obvious to her this was the kitchen.

More lights came on, and Celestia followed Luna into what had to be the living room. The floor had a dark wine carpet, and tastefully upholstered furniture was arranged in a semicircle at the center of the room; there were shelves full of photos and knick-knacks and more things Celestia didn't recognize, mostly piled up on a large piece of furniture that covered most of one wall.

"I don't suppose you have a cell phone?" Luna asked as she walked through the living room toward a hall on the other side.

"I have no idea what that is," Celestia answered absently, following her.

Luna stopped and stared at her. "How can a teenage girl in this day and age not know what a cell phone is?"

"I...I'm sorry," Celestia said with a nervous laugh. "There are a lot of things here I've never seen or even heard of before."

Luna looked her up and down, a thoughtful frown on her face. "Good lord, the resemblance is uncanny," she said, shaking her head. "You really do look exactly like Tia." She sighed. "Well, let me show you the guest room. If Tia isn't home yet, that means she's probably bringing dinner. I hope she picked up pizza." She paused, then pulled something small, flat, and shiny out of her pocket. Her hand moved across it for a moment; after staring at it intently, she sighed. "She's bringing home fried chicken," Luna announced. "That should feed all three of us; she usually gets enough so she can have cold chicken later."

Luna started walking again; Celestia followed her. She was led into a small, sparsely decorated room with a plain wooden dresser, a soft-looking bed with a lavender comforter, and a tall mirror with a wooden frame. She stepped in front of the mirror and looked herself up and down.

Celestia had only vague knowledge of humans, having seen this world only once before, centuries earlier. At the time, she had never seen herself as a human. She could easily tell that she was much younger than the woman who claimed to be Luna. Her hair retained its vibrant hues, but was pulled back in a high ponytail and held in place by a scrunchie with two glittery golden beads. Tiny sun-shaped gold earrings graced her absurdly small earlobes, and a thin gold chain necklace with a rhombus-cut amethyst pendant hung around her neck. Her hairless skin was a milky pinkish-white and unblemished, save for tiny scratches and specks of dirt on her hands and knees. She wore a loose, diaphanous white sundress and matching sandals. She tilted her head as she studied herself in the mirror, turning this way and that.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you've never seen your own reflection before," Luna quipped.

"I haven't," Celestia said without thinking. "I mean...not recently."

"Hmm." Luna shook her head. "You're a strange girl..."

The sound of a door opening and closing filled the house, followed by Celestia's own voice calling out, "Luna! I'm back! Come on into the kitchen, I'm starving!"

Luna sighed. "We'll be there in a minute, Tia," she replied. "Come on, let's get you washed up and then we'll eat."

Celestia followed Luna to the bathroom, where both women washed their hands. They then returned to the kitchen; as they drew closer, Celestia heard her own voice say, "Do we have a guest?"

"We do indeed," Luna said with an amused chuckle. They entered the kitchen, and Celestia was brought up short by the woman standing there.

"I...I thought I knew what to expect, but this is incredible," she breathed as she looked at the tall woman. "You're...you're me."

The adult Celestia looked at her in stark disbelief, eyes wide and mouth slack. She blinked twice. "Luna? Who...what..."

"Celestia," Luna said in a dry tone, "meet Celestia."

Princess Celestia slumped down into one of the chairs at the kitchen table, her eyes never leaving her doppelganger. The taller Celestia mirrored her actions, eyes equally wide with disbelief. "What...the...hell?"

"My thoughts exactly," Luna said. "Now, how about that chicken?"

Book One, Prologue (Side Sunset)

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Book One, Chapter 1 (Side Celestia)

Principal Celestia sized up the teenage girl who looked just like her. For a long time, she said nothing. Then, a wry smirk graced her lips. "Haha. Very funny, Luna. You had me going with this one. Very good job with the hair dye, though. How hard was it to find a girl whose skin was the same shade as mine and who had the same eye color, though? Or is that makeup and contacts?"

Luna shook her head as she reached for the large cardboard bucket on the table. "You think this is one of my practical jokes, Tia?"

"Well, it's a little different from your usual style, I admit."

Luna groaned as she extracted three pieces of chicken from the bucket and placed them on a paper plate, then dug through one of the bags that accompanied it. "Seriously, is anybody here but me going to eat? Help yourself," she said aside to Princess Celestia.

Princess Celestia shook herself and tentatively reached for the bucket, pulling out a chicken drumstick and eyeing it dubiously. She gave it an experimental sniff. "What is this?" she asked curiously. "If I didn't know better, I'd swear it smells like meat."

"It is meat," Luna said as she dumped a huge spoonful of mashed potatoes and gravy on her plate, then plopped two large, golden biscuits next to it. "What, you've never had fried chicken?"

"No, I...I haven't," Princess Celestia said.

Principal Celestia raised an eyebrow. "You seriously don't know what fried chicken is?" she asked as she began serving herself.

"She also doesn't know what seat belts or cell phones are," Luna said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, Tia, pour us all some sodas. You, uh, do at least know what soda is, right?"

"Yes, of course," Princess Celestia said as her counterpart stood and walked to the refrigerator. "We do have it in Equestria. I'm afraid I don't have it very often. It's terribly frowned upon in Ca—err, in the city where I live." Luna added some mashed potatoes and cole slaw to Princess Celestia's plate, along with a second piece of chicken and two biscuits.

Principal Celestia placed three glasses full of ice on the table and began filling them from a two-liter bottle of cola. "Well, it's not exactly good for you," she said. "I try not to drink too much of it myself. Unlike some people I could name."

"Hey, I burn off the calories," Luna protested as she took a giant bite out of a chicken thigh.

Once Principal Celestia finished pouring the drinks, she sat and studied the two seated across from her, particularly the younger version of herself. "Okay, so what is going on here?" she asked.

Princess Celestia sighed as she struggled to emulate the way Luna handled her own fork with less than complete success. She managed two bites of mashed potatoes before she started picking at her biscuit with her fingers. "I had a falling out with someone very important to me. Her name is Sunset Shimmer. I followed her here, but our way home...well, it's cut off. It will be thirty moons before I can return to my own land, and Sunset Shimmer is out there somewhere, in this city, doing who knows what..."

"Thirty moons?" Luna asked, snorting. "Are you Eweropean or from the Buffalo tribes? Make up your mind, kid."

"Luna, hush," Principal Celestia chided. She frowned at Princess Celestia. "And your name is—?"

"Celestia," Princess Celestia said. "The same as you." She swallowed a bite of biscuit, then added, "This...might sound completely crazy, but—"

"You're me, right?" Principal Celestia asked. "Is that what you were about to say?"

"Sort of."

"Thirty moons," Principal Celestia said thoughtfully. "That's...a little over two years, right?" She frowned. "You know, strange things happen every two years or so at CHS. There's been a school legend since long before I was principal that the school statue is haunted or cursed."

"That old story?" Luna snorted. "Please. Kids have been blaming that statue for everything from missing homework to losing the Friendship Games for years."

Princess Celestia took a deep breath. "I know how crazy it sounds that...that you and I are the same being."

"It'd be easier to accept 'daughter from the distant future' or 'distant cousin who freakishly looks exactly like me'," Principal Celestia said. "Or 'obsessed stalker fangirl', though that wouldn't make sense under the circumstances."

Luna snickered. "You forgot 'yourself from the past because time travel'," she added.

Princess Celestia stood up and slammed her palms on the table. "I WILL NOT BE MOCKED!" she yelled. "My kingdom, my subjects, are without their Princess for the first time in three thousand years! I cannot return home and have no way of assuring them that I am alive! My entire kingdom could well descend into chaos! All because I foolishly chased one petulant student...through..." She slumped back into her chair, burying her face in her hands, heedless of the grease from her dinner. "Sunset," she moaned, a sob shaking her slight frame.

Principal Celestia and Luna fell silent, staring at her, then at one another, with wide, startled eyes. Principal Celestia wiped her mouth with her napkin and cleared her throat. "Why don't you start at the beginning?" she asked gently.

* * * * *

Over the course of the next two hours, Princess Celestia had spoken at length to the human counterparts of herself and her sister. She had, in her despair and vulnerability, told them everything. Who she was, where she came from. That she was not human, though she did not tell them exactly what she was. She told them of her kingdom, her own sister and her tragic downfall. She named names—particularly Blueblood and Cadance—and learned of some differences between the two worlds, such as Cadance not being Principal Celestia's adopted niece, but rather Luna's old friend from college and the Dean of Students of a private school in the city. She told them of the mirror portal, and of Sunset Shimmer. She told them of Sunset's ambitions, the rift between them, and ultimately, of the argument that led to Sunset's departure through the mirror.

As she spoke, she ate, though she was very picky about the chicken, eating very little of it even though she seemed to enjoy it. By the time she finally wound down, her voice was hoarse and raw, and her eyes drooped with exhaustion. Luna took her to the guest room and helped her change into a spare nightgown, then gently laid her down in the guest bed.

Now, Luna and Principal Celestia sat on the living room sofa, nursing cups of coffee. "What do you think, Tia?" Luna asked.

"I don't know what to think," Celestia said, shaking her head. "I don't think she's making it all up. Or rather, she seems to believe every word of what she said." She frowned. "The name 'Sunset Shimmer' is ringing some bells in my head. It seems familiar somehow, but I can't place it."

"Well, the bad news is she wasn't carrying any identification at all," Luna said with a grimace. "I stripped her bare-ass naked and other than the dress, shoes, jewelry, and panties she was wearing, she doesn't have anything. No identification, no phone, not even a bra."

"I kind of noticed the lack of a bra," Celestia said with a dry chuckle.

"And another thing," Luna said. "The hair's natural." She glanced significantly at her sister. "If she's not you, she's your clone, because nobody else on this planet has your freaky pastel rainbow hair."

Celestia sighed. "Do you really think she's me from a parallel magical world?"

Luna snorted. "I don't believe in things like that," she said. "Now, cloning, time travel, that I believe in."

Celestia slapped her upside the head. "Be serious," she said. She pulled out her phone and idly searched the web for 'Sunset Shimmer'. She frowned at the results. "I knew that name sounded familiar. Sunset Shimmer...a girl by that name was reported as a runaway two years ago. She was never found." She showed Luna the article, which had a photo of the missing teen. "Is that her?"

"I didn't get a good look at her," Luna said, frowning. "All I really saw was a leather jacket, maybe a streak of red hair..." She tilted her head. "Could be her. We'll ask Celes—the girl when she wakes up."

Celestia groaned. "I think for simplicity's sake, we should just call her Tia," she said. "At least until we have a better handle on who she really is."

Luna shrugged. "Fair enough. So, umm...what are we going to do with her?"

Celestia sighed. "I don't know," she said. "We should take her to the police, but..." She grimaced. "Without identification, without any clue where she's really from, the police are going to take one look at her and one look at me—"

"They're going to think she's your daughter and you're wasting their time," Luna finished with a frown. "Yeah, I was kind of thinking that myself." She set her coffee cup down on the table. "I think we're stuck with this kid," she said. "At least, until we know what the hell's going on here."

Celestia ran a hand through her hair. "All things considered, we don't really have much of a choice," she said. "Though to be honest...I get the feeling taking responsibility for her is the right thing to do. That...that we should help her ourselves. Not...not pawn her off on child services or some psychiatrist."

Luna smirked. "She could be the daughter you always wanted," she teased.

"Niece," Celestia corrected. "Or cousin. If we're...if we're really doing this, we're pretending she's our cousin."

"Suit yourself," Luna said with a laugh. She stood up and stretched. "I guess I'd better take her shopping in the morning. She's going to need some more clothes. And a phone. And a bra."

"I'll enroll her at CHS while I'm working on the student rolls for the coming year," Celestia said. "The good thing about being principal is I can fake her enrollment information and nobody will ask questions."

"That's a felony, sister," Luna cautioned.

"No, it's a clerical error," Celestia corrected with a sly smile. Luna shook her head and padded off to her bedroom. Celestia finished her stone-cold coffee with a grimace and stood, stretching. She took both cups to the kitchen, washed them, then headed to the bathroom to brush her teeth. On her way to her own bedroom, she stopped by the guest room to check on the sleeping teenager. She was tossing fitfully, murmuring the names 'Luna' and 'Sunset' over and over.

Celestia's eyes softened, and she leaned down to brush the girl's hair out of her face. "If you really are me," she whispered, "I know how badly you're torturing yourself over your mistakes. I hope...I hope we can help you."

With that, she headed for her own room, where she lay awake for hours, deep in thought, before sleep finally claimed her.

Book One, Chapter 1 (Side Sunset)

Author's Note

Although the primary purpose of this story is an AU where Celestia chased Sunset through the portal, it's giving me an excuse to write a story I've always wanted to write: the years Sunset spent adapting to the human world and learning how to fit in. So really, you guys are getting two stories for the price of one here. :pinkiehappy:

I'll be referencing some personal headcanon about the calendar system in Equestria in this story, which I've used before in another story and posted in a blog post a long time ago that I'm too lazy to look up. To sum up: for the purposes of this story, the Equestrian calendar is divided into eight lunar months of equal length (28 days), which are, in order: Wintersun, Thawingmoon, Springsun, Summermoon, Summersun, Harvestmoon, Autumnsun, and Wintermoon.

Please note that for the purposes of narrative convenience, things the reader should be familiar with but Sunset would not will be described normally unless it's necessary to describe them from Sunset's unfamiliar perspective.

Book One, Chapter 1 (Side Sunset)

The hospital room was quiet.

At some point during the night, the nurses had disconnected Sunset Shimmer from whatever machines she had been hooked up to. She knew very little of the trappings of hospital rooms, having only been in the hospital once herself as a small filly. She could only assume that was a good sign.

It was dark. Dim starlight filtered through a window with closed blinds; the light wasn't enough for her to see anything by. She thought about sitting up and trying to move around, but a dull ache permeated her being, and even shifting around caused her head to throb.

Worse, now that the adrenaline rush from her escape had worn off, Sunset realized how alien her own body was. With a heavy sigh, she lay her head against the soft pillow underneath it, staring up at the dark ceiling.

She had to admit her countless hours of illicit research had not prepared her for the reality of her current situation. She had unearthed tomes of Starswirl the Bearded's research into parallel worlds, alternate realities where the familiar and the alien collided in a surreal landscape. Nowhere had any of her research mentioned physically transforming into...whatever she was now.

"Whatever," she said into the darkness. "I showed up that old nag Celestia, that's all that matters."

Celestia...

She'd followed Sunset through the portal.

It had closed behind her.

Sunset worried at her lip. A pang of remorse and regret washed over her. She knew all too well what Princess Celestia's presence in this world meant for Equestria.

In all likelihood, it meant in thirty moons, there wouldn't be an Equestria to return to.

Her jaw tightened. "I guess...I'll just have to learn everything I can about this world," she said. "If she's stuck here with me, I'll have to prove I'm her superior here, or...or this was all for nothing."

She slipped into a fitful slumber fraught with restless nightmares.

* * * * *

Bright sunlight spilled through the blinds, glowing against the crisp white linens. Sunset winced as she opened her eyes, which felt puffy and swollen. Gingerly, she sat up, a slight wave of queasiness washing through her at the strangeness of the motion. "Ugh..."

Now that there was light to see by, she looked down at herself. Her arms no longer ended in hooves, but rather minotaur-like hands, hairless with slender fingers. She wiggled them experimentally, raising an eyebrow. The motion caused a slight jolt of pain in her left hand; she quickly traced that to a thick needle which pierced the skin of that hand, held in place by tape and connected to a flexible tube. The tube, in turn, was connected to a half-empty bag of fluid that hung from a metal pole by the bed.

The sheet fell away from her chest, and she stared down at two prominent lumps that shifted around beneath the thin hospital gown she wore. She frowned in confusion. "The hay?"

She lifted the sheet and took a look at her legs. They were long, broad, and ended not in hooves, but in soft feet with short, blunt digits. *Toes,* she told herself. *I've seen animals with toes, I know what toes are.* She wiggled them. *This is so weird.* She let the sheet fall back into place and let out a sigh. "Well, Sunset, you're a...whatever this thing is now." She reached up and felt her forehead. "No horn. I guess that means no magic."

The door opened, and a shortish woman with curly hair wearing magenta scrubs, who Sunset assumed to be a nurse, walked in. "Good morning!" she said. "How are we feeling today?"

"Sore," Sunset said. "Tired. Confused."

"Mm, well, that's to be expected," the nurse said as she busied herself with taking Sunset's blood pressure and checking her other vitals using devices she didn't recognize, then writing it all down on a thin, flat clipboard that didn't seem to have any paper on it—in fact, it seemed to be lit up from within somehow. As the nurse worked, Sunset became aware of an uncomfortable pressure in her bladder. She grimaced, squirming a bit. The nurse looked up. "Something wrong, sweetie?"

"I, umm...need to pee," Sunset said with a grimace.

The nurse nodded. "You'll need me to help you," she said. "You need to get out of bed slowly so you don't aggravate those ribs, alright?"

Sunset nodded. She pulled back the sheet and shifted around, slowly swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. She hissed in pain as the side where the carriage struck her burned intensely. She sucked in a breath through gritted teeth, screwing her eyes shut.

"Yeah, it's gonna hurt," the nurse said sympathetically. "When we're done I'll bring you an ice pack, okay? By the way, they'll be bringing breakfast in about fifteen or twenty minutes."

Sunset slowly stood up, wobbling; the nurse steadied her. Taking one slow step at a time, with the nurse guiding her all the way while tugging the IV stand, Sunset made her way to the small bathroom attached to her hospital room.

Once inside, she faced what had to be the toilet with a blank look. *Okay, now how do I do this...*

* * * * *

Desert Sunrise found his wife in Sunset's room, changing the bedsheets. He frowned. "Honey? You know she's not...not coming home for a few days yet."

Sunset Satin turned and faced him. Her eyes were bloodshot and her movements were jerky. "I know," she said, wringing her hands. "It's just...I couldn't sleep, so I've...I've been in here all night cleaning up her room, getting it ready for her." She frowned. "I'm going to need to get her measurements so we can buy her some new clothes and have them ready for her when she gets home. She's grown so much!" She looked down at herself, then blushed. "I don't know where she got those...breasts from, they sure didn't come from my side of the family."

Sunrise coughed, a blush rising to his chest. "Dear? You're making me a bit uncomfortable," he said.

Satin rolled her eyes. "Oh, behave," she chided. She yawned. "What time is it?"

"Almost seven," Sunrise said. "I think we'll go out for breakfast this morning, alright?"

Satin nodded. "A-alright. But we'll go to the hospital straight after, right?"

"Of course we will."

Satin blinked back fresh tears. "Our baby came home, Des."

Sunrise smiled. "I know, dear. I know."

* * * * *

By the time an orderly brought Sunset's breakfast, her face was still burning with humiliation from her bathroom incident. The nurse had had to help her clean herself up, and seemed rather disconcerted by how...poorly the whole thing had gone.

*I get the feeling my injuries aren't going to cover for the fact that I don't even know how to pee right,* Sunset thought as the orderly set the tray on a high, wheeled table that slid over the bed. He adjusted its height, then lifted the cover off for her and set it on the bed by her leg before leaving the room.

A bowl of oatmeal, two small pancakes, a lump of scrambled eggs, and two grey-brown puck-like discs of something Sunset couldn't identify were arranged on her plate. The tray also held a small carton of milk, a little plastic tub of orange juice, a small tub of pancake syrup, a pat of butter sandwiched between two slivers of waxed paper, and packets of sugar, salt, and pepper. Finally, there was a wrapped drinking straw, a plastic knife, fork, and spoon, and a paper napkin.

Sunset studied the various condiments and utensils with trepidation. She had not used her hooves to handle food or utensils since she was a small filly, relying solely on her magic for everything at the dinner table. She examined her hands, flexing the fingers, observing how each joint moved. So far, she'd had little difficulty moving larger objects—sheets, her gown, the paper towels in the bathroom—with her new hands, but this...

Haltingly, Sunset picked up the little pat of butter with her right thumb and forefinger. Screwing up her face in concentration, she made an effort to peel the wax paper off, succeeding on her third try. Elated, she picked her plastic knife up in a clumsy, full-fisted grip and scraped the butter off the other piece of wax paper, then smeared it on the top pancake. Feeling emboldened, she tried to peel the foil top off the little tub of syrup. After almost a full minute of struggling, she gave up and used her teeth to peel it off, then poured it over the pancakes.

Tearing the paper packets of condiments in half with her fingers was easier than peeling the top off the syrup, but very messy; she got about half the sugar into her oatmeal, and the salt and pepper were clumped and uneven on her eggs. Still, it got the job done. She grabbed her fork in a fist and stabbed the pancakes, trying to cut through them with the edge.

"Sorry it took so long," the nurse said as she walked through the door. "Some idiot didn't refill the ice chest, I had to go to the other station and—" She trailed off. "Umm, you know, it'd be easier to eat if you held your fork the right way."

Sunset blinked, staring at her. "Umm..." She looked down at her fork. "I..." She faked a sheepish laugh. "You're right. I just...guess I'm not all here today."

"Yeah, I noticed," the nurse said dryly. "I've never seen a girl your age miss the toilet before." She shook her head and walked over, taking the fork from Sunset's hand and turning it a different way, reshaping Sunset's hold on the fork so that the handle rested between the first two fingers, with her thumb laid atop the handle. Sunset studied the fork and its new placement, then experimented by cutting into the pancakes. To her surprise, it was much easier now. As she took her first syrupy bite, the nurse lifted her gown and applied a freezing cold icepack to her ribs. She let out a gasp, but quickly relaxed as the cold numbed and soothed the sharp pain. The nurse then applied some ointment to Sunset's side. "Looking good, no sign of infection," she said. "Is there anything you like to watch on TV?"

*What's TV...?* "Not really?" Sunset offered.

The nurse picked up a bulky, button-covered object which hung from a thick cord at the edge of the bed. "Well, I'm sure you know how to work the remote," she said. "Just press the call button if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay," Sunset said. The nurse patted her on the shoulder and gave her an encouraging smile, then left. Shaking her head, Sunset turned her attention back to her breakfast.

The pancakes were a little flat and flavorless, but not terrible. The eggs tasted off, and the oatmeal was a lumpy, bland, tasteless mess. The little brown puck things, on the other hand, had a nice, mildly spicy flavor to them and were by far the most interesting thing on her plate. She washed down the bland oatmeal and disappointing eggs with the cold, delicious milk; when she finished her breakfast, she peeled open the orange juice and gulped it down greedily.

Once Sunset finished her breakfast, she pushed the tray table away and, for lack of anything better to do, turned her attention to the little button machine the nurse had placed within arm's reach. She examined it; there were buttons for raising and lowering the head and foot ends of the bed, a nurse call button, ten numbered buttons from zero to nine, and buttons marked 'TV on/off', 'Channel +/-', and 'Volume +/-'.

She pressed the button marked 'TV on/off', and something mounted on the wall across from her bed beeped twice before showing a picture of a man sitting at a desk, talking. She blinked. "Is this a movie?" She craned her neck around, looking for a projector. "Where's it coming from?"

If it was a movie, it was a boring one. The man at the desk was talking about unemployment rates, stock prices, and fears of a coming economic recession. At some point, a woman's face appeared in a little floating box next to him, and she said the man's recession talk was unfounded and that the economy was stable and getting better. Sunset shook her head, tuning it all out, and looked at the button device again. She tried pressing the number two. In the corner of the screen, a green number 2 appeared, and the picture changed. Now it showed a different man and woman at a different desk.

"Now we turn to Fluffy Clouds for your first look at today's weather," the man said. The picture changed, showing a blue-skinned man in a light grey suit with an orange bowtie and a huge, curly pile of white hair atop his head. He stood in front of a map that looked vaguely like the eastern half of Equestria; Sunset sat up, paying closer attention.

"Well, we're looking forward to a beautiful summer day in Canterlot," Fluffy Clouds said. "That high pressure system isn't going anywhere anytime soon, so once again we're going to see a hot, dry, sunny day, with temperatures warming into the mid-seventies by noon, and an afternoon high of about eighty-three for most of Canterlot. If you've got outdoor plans, this is a good day for it. For tonight, we should have lows in the upper fifties with light breezes from the west-northwest. For the next five days, our forecast looks pretty much the same..."

*Canterlot. So this is a parallel Equestria. That's interesting.*

The picture cut back to the two people at the desk, who started talking about "identity theft". Sunset listened with curiosity as they rattled off a list of advice, accompanied by words printed in place of the picture of the two people. Sunset couldn't understand a single thing they were saying. *It appears I have a lot to learn about this world.*

There was a knock on the door, which opened after a moment. A doctor walked in; it wasn't the same doctor from the night before. He was younger, shorter, and wasn't wearing a white coat. He was studying a flat, glowing clipboard similar to the one the nurse had carried. "Well, good morning," he said distractedly. He looked up at the TV, then back at Sunset. "Oh, come on. A pretty teenage girl like you can't find anything less boring to watch than the news?"

Sunset shrugged.

"Oh well. So, how's your pain this morning? On a scale from one to ten, ten being the worst pain ever."

Sunset thought about it. "About an eight when I move," she said. "About a four when I don't."

The doctor nodded. "It's going to be like that for a while," he said. "Ice packs on your ribs for a couple of weeks, at least two times a day. We're going to keep you on an IV while you're here, but when you go home, we'll have to prescribe some pain pills." He scrawled something on that strange clipboard. "Your parents will have to manage your pain medicine. Is that okay with you?"

*No.* "Of course."

"That's just the law," the doctor said. "Since there've been problems with kids abusing prescription medication lately. At least it's summer, so you don't have to go to school with your ribs like that." He made another mark on his clipboard. "Now, the bruising to your breast...I wouldn't worry about that too much. It should heal quickly. If it doesn't fade within, oh, four or five days, make sure to let somebody know. It'll probably be tender for a while."

"Okay."

"We're keeping you here for a couple of days for observation," the doctor said. After a moment, he asked, "So why'd you run away from home?"

Sunset thought about that for a minute. "I don't remember," she said.

"Hmm." The doctor frowned. "You know, I'm not much older than you. I've only been here two years. I know what it's like. I had fights with my parents when I was your age." He chuckled. "One time, they caught me smoking a joint. I just wanted to try it, you know, everyone was. They got so mad." He shook his head.

"I don't even remember the last time I saw them," Sunset said listlessly. And it was true—ever since she became Princess Celestia's student, she'd become so distant from her family she honestly didn't remember the last time she'd made time for them. She vaguely recalled her mother showing up at the castle on her last birthday. Or was it the one before?

Traitorous tears glistened in her eyes. The doctor looked at her and frowned. "Touchy subject, okay. I'll just...let you work that out with your folks and the psychiatrist." He made another note on his clipboard, then glanced up at the TV. "A little advice, though? Find something more cheerful to watch than the news." He picked up the little button machine and punched two numbers; the picture changed to what looked like a fairly shabby living room, with two women talking back and forth at each other. Obnoxious laughter rang out from the screen practically every time one of them said anything. The doctor gave her an encouraging smile, then turned and left.

For the next hour, Sunset played with the little button box. She raised her bed some, then figured out that the 'Channel +/-' button made the picture change without the numbers. Sometimes it showed more people sitting at a desk talking about news, while other times it showed more people in living rooms or other places talking, with laughter accompanying them. Once, there was an older man in a white suit marching around in a courtroom, berating a witness. Another time, there were what looked like this world's version of zebras, dancing and rhyming to strange, mostly rhythmic music. Eventually, it cycled back around to that first set of people talking about news and current events in Canterlot. She turned the volume down and flicked the button box off the side of the bed, reclining against her pillow and closing her eyes.

"Sunset?"

She opened her eyes. Desert Sunrise and Sunset Satin were standing by the bed. She offered them a weak smile. "Hey."

"How are you feeling?" Satin asked, pulling a chair up to the bed and sitting down right beside her. She ran a hand through Sunset's hair fondly.

"Sore," Sunset said.

"Can we get you anything?" Satin asked. "Are you thirsty? Go get her something to drink, Des."

"Yeah, something to drink sounds good," Sunset said. "Anything."

Desert Sunrise nodded and left the room.

Satin looked up at the screen on the wall. "So, what're you watching?" she asked.

"I have no idea," Sunset said. "I just left it on and kinda drifted off."

An awkward silence fell.

"Sweetie...where have you been?" Satin asked softly.

Sunset took a deep breath. "I don't know," she said, a quaver in her voice.

"What do you mean, you don't know?" Satin asked, tilting her head.

"I mean I don't know where I've been," Sunset said, looking at her with as much sincerity as she could muster.

Desert Sunrise walked back in, holding a bottle of cola. He walked over and handed it to Sunset, then sat down.

"Thanks," Sunset said. She studied the cap on the bottle with a frown. "Actually, Mom, can you pour this in a cup for me? Maybe with some ice? I think they gave me some ice a little bit ago."

Satin smiled. "Of course," she said. She located Sunset's ice pitcher and the plastic tumbler they'd given her, filling the cup with ice before pouring half the soda into it and setting the bottle on the overbed table. Sunset watched her hands the entire time, observing the way she twisted the cap.

"Thanks," Sunset said, reaching for the cup and bringing it to her lips. She tipped it back and gulped down some of the sweet, bubbly cola, giving an appreciative murmur as she smacked her lips. She looked at her "parents". "So, umm...how are things?"

They looked at each other awkwardly. "Good," Sunrise said. "They're...they're good. Work's going fine, we're both...fine." He looked at her, searching her face. "Things were...kind of rough for a while after you, you know. We...had some rough times."

"Oh. I'm sorry," Sunset said. *I wonder what really happened...*

She'd spent much of the night before thinking. She wasn't entirely convinced the people she saw were really her parents, or if she was having some sort of trauma-induced delirium. It did stand to reason, however, based on some of Starswirl's notes she'd found and read, that if parallel worlds existed, and there were alternate versions of ponies from Equestria there...

These were her parents, and there was another Sunset Shimmer in this world. And she had run away from home.

Sunset didn't need to know anything about this world to know the odds of their Sunset ever coming home were slim to none...if she was even still alive.

*Which works out just fine for me, if I can bluff my way through these first few days...*

"Sunset was just telling me she doesn't know where she's been all this time," Satin said in a light tone that nevertheless carried an edge of doubt and disappointment.

Sunrise frowned, gazing intently at Sunset. "How can you not know where you've been?" he asked.

Sunset shrugged. "I don't," she said with a hitch in her voice. "I don't even remember...leaving. Or why." She looked at them with what she hoped was an expression of utter helplessness. "I don't...really remember anything."

They shared a significant glance. Sunrise frowned. "You know, young lady...you don't have any head injury from last night. If you're...if you're trying to fake amnesia to get out of explaining yourself..."

*Wow, their Sunset must've been a real twat!* Sunset shook her head. "I'm not...I mean..." She took another sip of cola. "I really don't remember." She shrugged. "All I remember is...is running. I don't know where from, or where to, or why. I just...I just remember running." She looked at Sunrise. "Then I got hit, and then you were there. That's really all I can remember." She frowned down at her lap. "I don't remember home. I don't...I don't remember anything."

Satin gasped. "Oh my god," she breathed.

Sunrise's jaw clenched. "Alright," he said. "Let's start with the night you disappeared." He leaned forward, folding his hands in his lap. "Three times, Sunset. Three times we caught you sneaking out at night to see that thug we told you we didn't want you getting mixed up with. You were thirteen, he was sixteen, and he came around stinking of alcohol. He was rude, he was disrespectful, and we found out two months after you left that he tried to kill his own mother. He's in prison now. Adult prison."

Sunset grimaced. "Wow, he sounds like a charmer," she said.

"You certainly thought so," Sunrise continued. "Because we told you we didn't want to catch you with him, but you kept disobeying us and sneaking out of the house to meet him. We grounded you and you snuck out anyway. Do you remember any of this?"

Sunset shook her head. "I really don't," she said. "I don't even know who you're talking about, and I'm pretty sure that's a good thing."

"And how about getting suspended from school for bad behavior and keying your history teacher's car, do you remember that?"

Sunset shrugged helplessly. "Sorry." *That sounds like some kind of vandalism. I know I can be pretty defiant—that's how I ended up in this mess in the first place—but this other me sounds like a major jerk.*

Sunrise took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose tiredly. "Look," he said. "We're just happy to have you home and that you're safe and alive. We want to put everything behind us. Wherever you went, whatever you did, it doesn't matter anymore, so long as we can start over. But we need to know we can trust you, young lady. We need to know it won't be the same all over again. We can't...we can't go through that again."

Sunset allowed tears to well up in her eyes. "Dad," she choked out, "I...whatever I did, I'm sorry. I wish I could remember, but...I can't. I don't...I don't remember anything." She sniffled.

"Nothing at all? You really have no idea where you've been for the last two years?"

"I don't even know where I am right now," Sunset said. "I mean, I'm assuming this is Canterlot because I heard that guy talking about the weather earlier," she continued, gesturing at the screen on the wall, "and because you're here, so...I mean, if you're here, this must be Canterlot, right? Canterlot is home, right?"

Sunrise and Satin blinked and exchanged a nervous glance. "Sunset?" Satin said hesitantly. "We...we moved here six months ago." She swallowed heavily. "I mean, we hoped maybe...and I made up a bedroom for you and put everything exactly where you had it except for those nasty magazines, just in case, but..." She shook her head. "When...when we had to leave Fillydelphia, we honestly...gave up."

Sunset looked down at her lap. "Oh," she said. *STUPID! Overplayed it.*

The door opened, and the white-haired doctor from the night before walked in, examining one of those glowing clipboards. He looked up and nodded at Sunset's parents briefly, then walked over to her with a gentle smile. "Good morning," he said. "We didn't exactly meet last night, I'm Dr. Swab, I was the attending on call when you were admitted last night, so I'll be your doctor. How are you feeling?"

"Sore, tired, confused," Sunset said.

"Well, you were just reunited with your parents after being hit by car," Dr. Swab said with a chuckle. "That's bound to rattle anyone." He looked at Sunrise and Satin. "I know you want to spend as much time with her as possible, but we have some tests to run and she needs to have a session with the psychiatrist. We have a lot to do if we want to get her out of here, and the sooner we get to it, the better."

"Of course," Sunrise said, putting his glasses back on and adjusting them. "She's going to be fine though, right?"

"Everything looks good from what I see," Dr. Swab said. "We just need to run some more tests."

Satin frowned. "Doctor, there's something you should know. Sunset...claims to be having memory problems."

Dr. Swab frowned, then looked at Sunset. "Memory problems, you say? You know, faking amnesia is one thing, but—"

"I don't remember anything about my life," Sunset said. "At all."

"Hmm." Dr. Swab looked at her for a long moment, then looked to her parents. He scratched his head. "It's possible she suffered some head trauma during the last two years, I guess. Or it might be purely psychological. People have been known to forget their entire lives for one reason or another. You usually see it in the homeless." He sighed. "I can order a CT scan just to be on the safe side."

Satin let out a relieved sigh. "Thank you, Doctor." She looked from Sunrise to Sunset, an encouraging smile on her face. "I'm...going to do some shopping," she said. "Do you...do you mind if I get your sizes from the clothes you were wearing last night? I'd like to get you a few things...for when you come home."

"Go right ahead," Sunset said.

While Satin went through Sunset's clothes and took notes, Sunrise frowned. "Well...I don't want to leave the hospital, and I wasn't planning on going in to the office today, but..." He sighed. "I guess I do need to do something about my car. And there are a couple of other things I should probably take care of." He sighed. "How long...?"

Dr. Swab shrugged. "I'd say come back around...four, maybe? We should be done by then."

"Alright." Satin took Sunset's hand and squeezed it gently, smiling at her. "Be strong, honey. We'll see you this afternoon, okay?"

Sunset nodded. "I...I will, Mom."

Her parents left, leaving Sunset alone with Dr. Swab, who was writing furiously on his clipboard. "Alright, Sunset, here's what we're going to do. I'm sending you down to radiology for a CT scan, then I'm going to have two very skilled, very capable nurses give you a more thorough looking-over than what you got last night. They're both women, so you don't need to feel embarrassed. After that, I'm going to see if I can get an OB/GYN to examine you, that's standard procedure when we're dealing with a teenage runaway such as yourself. That should keep you busy up through about lunch. After lunch, you'll be seeing Dr. Slate, he's our psychiatrist. Any questions?"

Sunset shook her head.

"Good." Dr. Swab smiled. "They'll be in to get you for your CT scan in a minute." He turned and left the room, leaving Sunset to think. She eyed the bottle of cola her mother had left on the table. She picked it up and, carefully and deliberately, twisted off the top, then drank the rest of it. A minute later, she let out a loud belch. Putting the empty bottle back on the table, she folded her hands behind her head and waited.

* * * * *

At fifteen minutes to four, Desert Sunrise and Sunset Satin returned to the hospital. After they spoke with the receptionist, she paged Dr. Swab, who rushed into the waiting room five minutes later, a bit breathless. "Good, you're here," he said. "We have a lot to talk about."

"Is something wrong, Doctor?" Satin asked fretfully. "Is...is there something wrong with our little girl?"

Dr. Swab sighed and scrubbed a hand through his hair. "Quite frankly, the only thing wrong is that there is nothing wrong," he said. He looked at them with troubled eyes. "Aside from the injuries sustained in the accident, Sunset is in completely perfect health, which, I have to be honest, is next to impossible for a runaway who's been missing for two years. Runaways always have something that needs attention. Malnutrition, scratches, scrapes, infections, STIs, signs of drug abuse..." He shrugged. "Runaways that come home never come home clean. Yours, well, did."

"But that's a good thing, right?" Sunrise asked hopefully.

"Well...yes and no," Dr. Swab said, shaking his head. "I mean, yes, as a doctor, I'm pleasantly surprised to see a girl in her situation in amazing health. I've never seen a healthier teenager, other than the cracked ribs and the bruising and internal bleeding, all of which she sustained within the last twenty-four hours. The X-rays we took last night look good. Her CT scan from this morning looks good. The drug screening came back negative. Her blood oxygen level is perfect. I had two female nurses and an OB/GYN look her over while you were out, and there isn't a mark or a scar on her body that didn't come from you hitting her with your car. Her hymen isn't even torn."

Satin put a hand to her chest. "Then she's fine," she said.

"She's too fine for a runaway who's been missing for two years," Dr. Swab said. "That's not the only thing, though. The clothes she was wearing? Brand new. She had no identification or money or anything in her pockets. She literally had nothing with her but a brand new set of clothes." He folded his arms. "I've treated a lot of runaways, Mrs. Satin. They show up in worn-out old clothes that are covered in dirt and dust. They have infected sores. They have scrapes and scratches. They have bruises. They're malnourished. They usually have traces of drugs in their system. They don't show up out of nowhere looking like a fashion model that just got off work." He cast his eyes down the hall toward Sunset's room. "This whole situation is wrong."

"What did the psychiatrist say?" Satin asked. "About her memory?"

Dr. Swab shook his head. "He's not a hundred percent. His initial diagnosis based on their first session is disassociative amnesia, but he put a possible malingering flag on his diagnosis. You'll have to speak with Dr. Slate directly tomorrow while we're running an MRI on Sunset to see if we missed anything in the CT scan."

Sunrise sighed, adjusting his glasses. "Look, Doctor," he said tiredly, "with all due respect, we don't care anymore. We just want her back. If she's healthy enough to go home and ready to go home, we want her home. If she wants to tell us where she's been and what she's been doing these last two years, she will. If she doesn't..." He shrugged. "It doesn't matter. We have our daughter back. We have our family back. We just want to put this long nightmare behind us."

Dr. Swab frowned. "I understand how you feel," he said. "It's just that...you need to be aware that this situation doesn't make sense." He paused, then added, "I don't want to step on Dr. Slate's toes and I am not a psychiatrist, but just between us, there are other things. Behavioral things the nurses and interns have picked up on just since this morning. You know how she insists she has no idea where she's been for the last two years?" At Sunrise's nod, he continued, "Well...this morning, she seemed to have trouble using the bathroom. The nurse said it was as though she'd forgotten how. Later, the same nurse observed her having trouble using a fork."

Satin's brow furrowed. "You know, it's strange," she said slowly. "She asked me to pour that drink in a cup for her. The cup was right there. The ice wasn't too far away. But she didn't just ask me to hand her the ice, she specifically asked me to pour it for her."

Sunrise groaned. "Now you've got her doing it," he grumbled.

"Look, all I'm saying is I want to do an MRI just to be sure," Dr. Swab said stiffly. "Also, until she's had at least three sessions with Dr. Slate, I'm not signing her discharge."

Sunrise stood there for a long moment, staring down the doctor. Finally, he sighed. "Fine," he said. "I...I know you're just looking out for her. It's just..."

"Honey," Satin said, touching his arm gently. "We've waited this long. We can wait a few more days. Besides, she is still healing. This might be better for her."

"Absolutely," Dr. Swab said. "Cracked ribs and the kind of bruises she has aren't difficult to treat at home by any means, but it'll be a little easier to manage here and it'll give the interns something to do." He offered a reassuring smile. "I just want to make sure when she does go home, you'll really be a family again and there aren't any..." He shrugged. "Surprises." He gestured with a shoulder towards Sunset's room. "Now, you should go visit your daughter. I'd prefer you not discuss any of what I said with her. Besides, you've got more important things to talk about, I'm sure."

"We certainly do," Sunrise said. "We've even got a little present for her."

"That's good, anything to cheer her up, get her talking." Dr. Swab shook his head. "She's just sitting there channel-surfing." He clapped Sunrise on the shoulder, then walked off.

Sunrise and Satin exchanged a worried, heavy glance, then squared their shoulders and headed for their daughter's room.

* * * * *

Sunset pressed the channel button again. Watched a few seconds of something inexplicably weird. Pressed it again. Watched a few seconds of something inexplicably stupid. Pressed it again. Watched a few seconds of something inexplicably mind-numbing.

Really, it was all there was to do now that they were finished cramming her into machines or poking her with things or looking at parts of her body she hadn't even seen yet or sticking freezing cold things up said parts or asking her a lot of questions that she had to convincingly shrug her way out of. Any second, she half-expected them to burst in, announce they had seen through her deception, and haul her off to whatever dungeons this world had.

The door opened, and Sunset turned down the volume as her parents walked in. "Hey, Mom and Dad!" she called cheerfully.

Satin smiled. "Hello, sweetheart," she said. "How are you feeling?"

"Still sore," Sunset said. "Tired. Kinda bored."

"Well, we have something that'll help with that," Satin said. She reached into the paper shopping bag she'd brought in with her and pulled out...something. It was bound in some firm magenta fabric, whatever it was. She opened a flap on one side of it and pulled out what looked like one of the strange clipboards the doctors and nurses all carried, except slightly larger and a different color. "You used to want one of these," she said. "But back then, we couldn't afford it, and frankly, your attitude wasn't..." She trailed off, grimacing. "A-anyway, I got it set up for you before we headed over here, but it still needs to charge..." She looked around the room for a minute, then spotted something just behind Sunset and to her right. She smiled and pulled a little plastic box out of the bag which had a long, thin cord wrapped around it. She unwrapped the cord and plugged the end of it into the clipboard, then mounted the box thing on the other end into two slots on the wall. A glowing amber light appeared on the edge of the clipboard.

Smiling and scooting closer, Satin touched something, and the thing lit up like the screen Sunset had been watching all day. Except instead of showing little movies, it showed a pattern of blue waves and a lot of little pictures with words under them, words like 'Tweetbook' and 'Messages' and 'Internet' and 'Games' and 'Photos' and 'Music'. At the top, it said '4:08pm'. Satin slipped a fingernail into a little groove on the edge and popped out a small plastic pen. "Let me just make sure we're connected to the hospital wi-fi..." She tapped the pen against the picture that said 'Internet', and the screen turned white, with a little rectangle box in the middle. She tapped something else, and a black box with all the letters of the alphabet in it appeared underneath that. "You know how to use this, right?" Satin asked.

"I, uhh...I think I can figure it out," Sunset said.

"Well, here's the instruction manual, just in case," Sunrise said, pulling a thin, flappy book out of the bag and tossing it over to Sunset. "Now, be careful with that. I don't think we can afford a replacement if you break it."

"I'll be careful," Sunset promised.

"And be sure to unplug it when it finishes charging," Satin said. "You know what they say can happen if you leave these things plugged in too long."

"Okay." Sunset sat the thing—which she learned from glancing at the instruction manual was called a 'tablet computer'—on her lap, and began reading the instructions very intently.

"If...if there's anything else you need," Satin said, "Don't hesitate to ask."

"I, umm...could actually, maybe, really use some...books?" Sunset said hopefully.

"Books?" Satin asked, blinking.

"Yeah. About...about anything, really."

"That's not a problem," Sunrise said, picking up the tablet from Sunset's lap and messing around with it for a few minutes. "I'll just add you to my account and you can use the digital library. It doesn't have every single book, but I think it's got enough books to keep you busy." After a minute, he handed it back, and Sunset looked at the screen.

The little rectangle box and the letter box had been replaced by a black screen with a red banner across the top, and a long list of categories: Romance, Science Fiction, Fantasy, Mystery, Horror, Thriller, Novelizations, Crime, Inspirational...on and on it went. She scrolled down the list and saw History, Culture, Self-Help, and more. *Interesting...* She smiled gratefully at her parents.

"Thank you," she said sincerely. "Really. Thank you." *You've just given me exactly what I need.*

Sunset divided her attention between talking to her "parents" and reading the instructions for the tablet. Just the instruction book was informative in ways the writers probably never intended, as she learned that it ran on electricity and emitted and received radio waves, carried a risk of electrical shock if mishandled, and that the thing it was plugged into at the wall was called an AC outlet. As she learned more from the instructions, she tested little things out on the tablet itself; she learned how to open the calendar, and discovered that the date was 'July 7'. Further exploration of the calendar showed her a total of twelve months, as opposed to Equestria's eight, and a year number that just made no sense whatsoever. *It was Summermoon in Equestria...the weather here feels about the same, at least.*

At half past four, Satin asked Sunset if she wouldn't mind turning the TV to a certain channel. She did so, and was treated to a scene of a courtroom with a woman and a man appearing before an elderly female judge who seemed to be fairly angry and impatient. The man was suing the woman over a loan of money and some items he purchased for her, and the woman was contending that the items and money were all gifts. Apparently, they had been engaged to be married, but then she had broken it off. Sunset watched with interest as the judge berated them for not having documents they were supposed to have and for generally being stupid people.

*I kinda like this judge.*

When the show broke for an advertisement for some sort of diarrhea medication (Sunset had observed that the things shown on TV all carried advertisements every eight to ten minutes or so), Sunrise left the room to get them all something to drink. When he brought the drinks back, Satin moved to get Sunset's ice bucket, but she waved her off and twisted the cap off her own drink, which was quite cold enough on its own. Satin seemed nonplussed by that, and exchanged a significant glance with Sunrise, whose brow furrowed in thought.

Sunrise and Satin stayed with Sunset, watching TV and talking with her as she absorbed all the information in the tablet's instruction booklet, then began browsing the list of books she could read in the digital library. Evidently, this world had a technology called the 'Internet', which made massive amounts of information available anywhere at any time.

The prospect made Sunset giddy.

A while after they arrived (and long after the tablet had finished charging), an orderly brought Sunset's dinner, which consisted of what appeared to be a hayburger, except with something similar to the tasty little grey pucks from Sunset's breakfast, as well as fries, a small salad, and a gelatin cup.

"Well," Sunrise said with a grimace, "it's been a long day, and I think we'll get out of here and let you enjoy your dinner and get some rest." He stood up; beside him, Satin did the same.

"We'll see you again tomorrow, okay sweetie?" Satin said.

Sunset smiled. "Sure thing, Mom. Dad."

After a round of hugging and a promise to bring her a 'cell phone' the next day, they left. Sunset opened her ketchup packets and squirted them over the fries, then crammed three in her mouth, picked her tablet up, went back to the Internet search page, and searched for 'cell phone'. After filtering through a lot of useless links to places selling them, she found actual information on what one was, and mentally filed it away as a Useful Thing To Have. She then searched the same site (which conveniently had its own internal search feature) for 'TV', and spent the rest of dinner learning exactly what the screen she'd spent all day staring at was.

From there, she spent most of the evening tapping one link after another from the first article, opening a deep well of information from which she drank greedily.

The tablet's battery was at 7% by the time she was too exhausted and too bleary-eyed to learn any more; she powered it off, plugged it in to charge, and lowered her bed so she could sleep comfortably. A nurse came in and turned off the room lights; the sun was setting outside.

Sunset closed her tired eyes and smiled as she snuggled into the pillow.

*Human. Homo sapiens sapiens. The only extant member of the Hominina clade, belonging to the family of great apes. That's what I am now. I wonder if the old nag has even figured that much out yet?*

Interlude I (Side Cadance)

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Book One, Chapter 2 (Side Celestia)

Princess Celestia awoke to a sensation thoroughly alien to her.

Golden rays of sunlight streamed through the window above her bed, spilling across the powder blue linen covering her and gently warming her face.

*Mmm...feels nice,* she thought sleepily.

Exactly five seconds later, her eyes flew open, and she shot straight up in bed.

"The sun is up? But how? I...WHO RAISED THE SUN?!" Her heart racing, she looked around the unfamiliar room...then down at herself.

And remembered everything from the night before.

She slumped back against the headrest, hand to her hammering heart. "Not Equestria," she panted. "Not home. No longer an alicorn. No magic. This sun is not mine to control." As her heart calmed, she let out a deep, sorrowful sigh. "Equestria..." She bowed her head. "Please, Mother, let your spirit guide Cadance. She can do what needs to be done. She...she has to."

There was a knock on the door. Celestia adjusted her gown. "Enter," she said.

The door opened, and Principal Celestia walked in, a faintly amused smile on her face. "Good morning," she said. She raised an eyebrow. "That was quite an interesting thing you yelled out just now. It seems someone needs to be taught basic science."

"I...umm..." Princess Celestia coughed. "A-anyway...good morning," she said. "And thank you for allowing me to stay here for the night."

"Actually, we're thinking of extending your stay with us, if that's alright with you," Principal Celestia said. "We can talk about it over breakfast." She laid a bundle she was carrying on the dresser. "I went through some of my old things and found some clothes that should fit you. I washed them, so they're..." She yawned. "Good to go. They might be a little out of style, but it'll do for when you and Luna go shopping today."

"Oh. Thank you," Princess Celestia said, blinking.

"I didn't want to chance one of my old bras," Principal Celestia said, "and the shoes you had with you should be okay." She grimaced. "Bras and panties should be top priority when you and Luna go out."

*I have no idea what that is.* "R-right."

Principal Celestia folded her arms. "We've decided to call you Tia," she said. "Is that alright?"

'Tia' nodded. "It's been...a very long time since I was called that, but I don't mind."

"Good!" Celestia said, clapping her hands with a bright smile. "I'll leave you to get dressed, then. Come to the kitchen when you're ready."

"Alright." Tia smiled. "Thank you."

Celestia nodded, then left. Tia sighed as the door closed. "I hope putting my faith and trust in these alternate versions of myself and my sister was the wise thing to do." She stood, wobbling for a moment as her new body's center of gravity asserted itself, and studied herself in the mirror. Her hair was loose from the ponytail she'd been wearing the previous night, and the jewelry she'd been wearing was missing. She was clad in a simple dark blue gown. After inspecting it for a moment, she slipped it off over her head, folding it neatly and laying it on the bed. She then studied her reflection in the mirror.

The only hair on her body was just above her feminine area, and it matched her pastel mane in color, but was sedately trimmed, barely present at all. The entire lower half of her body looked strange compared to what she knew of pony anatomy—truly exhaustive knowledge, considering her great age and breadth of experience.

The strangest part wasn't her hairlessness, lack of hooves, nor the wiggly little toes she had. The strangest part was that her teats were, for whatever reason, on her chest.

And rather larger than they should be.

"That's...not right," she said with a frown. She cupped them with her hands, testing them for swollenness or discharge, but aside from a slight sensitivity which made her breath hitch, there didn't seem to be anything wrong with them aside from their size and position. Shaking her head and sighing, she walked over to the dresser, picking through the clothes the other Celestia had left.

*No. Just Celestia. I need to start thinking of her as Celestia and myself as Tia, at least so long as I remain in this world.*

The garments were curious, if lacking in visual appeal. The nobles in Canterlot would certainly have declared a scandal if they saw their Princess wearing such things. All in all, there were three garments in the pile: a pair of old, faded blue jeans, a yellow T-shirt with a sun motif emblazoned across the front in black, and a small, silky white garment that gave her pause. She frowned and walked over to the chair in which Luna had piled the things she'd worn the night before, sifting through them. There was a similar, if finer, deep pink garment there. "Was I wearing that?" she wondered. "I don't remember seeing it..."

The door opened. "Tia, I'm making waffles, is there anyth—oops! Sorry," Luna's voice called.

Tia turned around, holding the two pairs of panties. "A little help here?" she asked, holding them up for inspection. "I'm a little confused."

Luna blinked at her. "By what? Which pair of panties to wear? It doesn't matter, just wear the clean ones."

"No, I mean—I don't even know what these are," Tia said.

Luna stared at her. "Seriously?" she asked.

Tia shrugged. "I've never seen anything like this before," she said apologetically.

Luna facepalmed. "Oh, for..." She shook her head. "You wear them under your pants, skirt, or dress. See where your legs go in?"

Tia examined the panties again, and blinked. "Oh...yes, I see," she said. She blushed. "Kind of obvious, I guess."

Luna snorted. "Anyway, as I was saying, I've got blueberries and I've got chocolate chips. Which do you prefer?"

"Blueberries sound lovely," Tia said as she stepped into the panties and pulled them up, noting the way they fit snugly against her crotch and rear.

"You and my sister both," Luna said, shaking her head. "Oh well, more chocolate chips for me!"

As Luna left, Tia put on the jeans and T-shirt, then slipped on the sandals she'd worn the night before. She examined the jewelry which had been laid out on the dresser. After several attempts to put it on, she gave up with a sigh, examining her fingers.

"Okay, before anything else, I need to figure out how to use these ridiculous things," she muttered. Shaking her head, she left to join her hosts for breakfast. As she moved through the house, tantalizing aromas and scintillating sizzling sounds enticed her senses, and she inhaled deeply, letting out a soft, appreciative moan. *I do so enjoy sitting down to a good breakfast,* she mused to herself as she wove her way through the living room toward the brightly-lit kitchen. She saw Celestia seated at the table, a coffee mug in one hand, a newspaper in the other. Celestia looked up as she approached and smiled, gesturing to the chair beside her. Tia sat down, folding her hands primly in her lap.

"Not wearing your earrings today?" Celestia asked. "That's a shame, they're rather pretty."

Tia paused briefly, contemplating what to say. She had already told her hosts so much, and yet...

Celestia must have picked up on her apprehension, because she put her paper down and turned fully to face her. "Tia?"

Tia sighed. "I'm sorry," she said. "I'm just..." She shook her head. "Last night, in my panic and vulnerability, I fear I said too much. Were I not..." She paused. "Were I more...collected, I believe I would have been more guarded with what information I shared." Luna set a glass of orange juice in front of her, and she picked it up and drank a third of it. "Still..." She examined her hand, studying the tapered, glossy fingernails. "If I am...if I am to trust my fate for the next thirty moons to the two of you, I should probably be as honest as possible. It's just..." She looked at Celestia nervously. "I fear such honesty will lead the two of you to think me insane."

"We already think that," Luna said cheerfully as she plated a waffle and poured more batter into the iron, then tended to something sizzling in a skillet. "Might as well go for broke, right?"

"Luna," Celestia said in a patient but firm tone of warning. She then turned a soft, reassuring smile on Tia. "The state of your mental health notwithstanding, you are clearly a young lady in need of help. And your...disturbing resemblance to me...effectively makes you our responsibility in any case." She sipped her coffee. "I have spent much of the night pondering you, your story, and your claims. For the moment, I am willing to accept anything you tell us on faith, provided you are honest with us. I will know if you attempt to deceive us or withhold anything," she added warningly. "If you are truly me—"

"I know," Tia said. "It is not easy—nor wise—to lie to me, and the same must be true of you."

The sounds of sizzling stopped. Luna started putting food on two plates, which she brought over and set in front of them. She then finished fixing her own breakfast and brought it over, sitting across from them. With the distraction of food, Tia found she could leave more sensitive topics aside for the moment. Her plate held two crisp, golden blueberry waffles, a generous portion of fluffy scrambled eggs, and three strips of bacon—though it looked and smelled quite different from the hay bacon Tia was familiar with. She picked up a piece and broke it in half, noting its greasy texture, and bit into it. After chewing for a moment, she said, "This is good. It's...different from anything I'm accustomed to, however. What is it?"

"It's bacon," Luna said as she poured syrup over her waffles.

"I know it's bacon," Tia said. "What I mean is, what's it made from?"

The sisters blinked at each other. "It's made from bacon," Luna said flatly.

"It's pork," Celestia elaborated.

Tia tilted her head. "Meat?"

"Yes, meat," Luna said as she cut a large bite of her waffles and brought it to her mouth.

Celestia poured syrup on her own waffles and turned to Tia. "Meat seems to be a hangup of yours," she said. "You're not a vegetarian, are you?"

Tia thought about how to answer that as she accepted the syrup for her own waffles. "I...am not accustomed to eating meat," she said. "It isn't...it isn't common or customary for my species to eat meat."

"Oh, right, I forgot, you're not human," Luna said, rolling her eyes.

"Human," Tia said, studying her hands as she cut into her own pancakes. "That's what I am now?"

"Yes," Celestia said. She frowned. "You seem to be having trouble with your fork," she said. "I noticed that last night as well."

Tia ducked her head. "I'm...trying to copy the way you and Luna use your utensils," she said.

"Do you not have forks and spoons where you come from?" Luna asked.

"No, we do have them," Tia said. "I just..." She looked at her hosts.

"You can trust us," Celestia said with a patient smile. "Whatever the problem is, you can trust us."

Tia looked into her eyes, saw the understanding and comfort there, and nodded. "I don't normally have, well...these," she said, wiggling her fingers.

"You don't have hands?" Luna asked curiously.

Tia shook her head. "It's an unfamiliar experience for me."

"Then how do you handle things like forks and pens?" Luna asked.

"Magic," Tia replied.

"Of course you do," Luna muttered, biting into a strip of bacon.

"You never actually mentioned what you..." Celestia paused for a bite of eggs. "What species you are."

"I deliberately avoided it," Tia admitted. "I thought it would be...too much."

Luna snorted. "Right, because 'I'm a magical princess from a magical alternate world and that statue outside CHS is a magical portal' was normal dinner conversation," she said.

Celestia rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Luna," she hissed, "try to be more supportive and less...you."

Luna gave her a look that Tia knew all too well from her own sister, and as painful as the memories were, she couldn't help but giggle. "Lulu always did delight in antagonizing me, especially at breakfast," she said.

Luna seemed taken aback. "Where did you hear that name?" she asked. "Ti—my sister hasn't called me that in years."

Tia smothered a naughty smirk, bringing her orange juice to her lips. "Did she stop calling you that before or after she stopped calling you Woona?"

Celestia, who had been in the middle of a sip of coffee, produced a textbook-perfect spittake. Luna stared, jaw agape, at Tia, whose eyes twinkled devilishly. She then looked accusingly at Celestia. "What the fuck did you tell her?" she hissed.

"I didn't tell her anything!" Celestia insisted, laughing as she mopped up coffee.

Tia smirked as she picked at another strip of bacon. "If you needed any more proof that I truly am Celestia," she said before popping the bacon into her mouth. After chewing it, she hummed thoughtfully. "I could get used to this. What animal does this meat come from?"

"Pigs," Celestia said.

"Hmm." Tia licked her fingers clean, then cut into her waffles again. "And...animals in your world are not sapient, I trust?"

Luna snorted. "Of course not," she said. "Humans are the only sapient species."

"And some great apes, and dolphins and whales," Celestia amended. "At least, that's what scientists think."

Tia frowned. "And...horses? Cows? Sheep? Donkeys?"

"No, of course not," Celestia said dismissively. "Horses are beautiful and intelligent creatures, don't get me wrong, it's why they're so highly revered in our society and culture. But they're no more sapient than the dog that keeps peeing on my azaleas."

"And cows aren't any of the above," Luna said. "The one thing they are is delicous."

Tia suppressed a shudder. "You don't...eat equines, I hope?"

Celestia made a disgusted face. "Of course not," she said.

Tia sighed in relief.

Luna raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me horses and cows and sheep talk where you come from," she said in a mildly sarcastic tone.

"Yes," Tia said simply.

Celestia stared at her, eyes wide. "Seriously?"

"Yes," Tia repeated. "All equines, most bovines." She took a deep breath, then plunged in. "Myself included."

Luna dropped her fork.

Celestia blinked. After a moment, she slowly said, "Equestria."

"The name is not coincidental," Tia said.

Luna shook her head, then peered at Tia with narrowed eyes. "You're...a horse."

"Pony," Tia clarified.

"You're telling us...you're a horse princess."

"That's right."

"From a magical land of talking horses."

Tia took a bite of eggs, staring at Luna with as open and honest an expression as she could muster.

Luna glanced from her to Celestia. "Say something," she said.

Celestia opened her mouth, started to talk, stopped, then shook her head. "No wonder you're having trouble with your hands," she said numbly.

"You seriously expect us to believe you're a magical talking horse princess who has somehow turned human," Luna said flatly.

"I don't expect you to believe anything," Tia said. "I have told you the truth. Whether or not you choose to believe it is up to you." She looked from Luna to Celestia, then wiped her mouth. "My name is Princess Celestia of Equestria. I am one of the last Alicorns. I have lived for over three thousand years. I have seen empires rise and fall. For millennia, I have raised the sun each morning and lowered it each night. I have fought and defeated usurpers, dragons, and demigods. I have ruled Equestria for most of my life. I am, to my dismay, worshipped as a goddess by many of my subjects. And in all of my many years of life, I have made three great mistakes. One of those mistakes separated me from my sister. Another led to my own personal heartbreak when I was forced to part with the one I loved. And the last...has brought me here." She finished her orange juice. "For the first time in a thousand years, I feel alone, small, and afraid. You—alien counterparts of myself and my beloved sister—are the only ones I can trust and rely on in this strange world where I am powerless." She looked from Celestia to Luna, her eyes old, tired, and sad. "That is the truth."

Tia finished her breakfast in the silence that followed her proclamation. Luna and Celestia watched her eat, neither seeming to want to speak.

Once Tia's plate was clear, Celestia swallowed heavily. "Alright," she said. "We'll do whatever we can to help you. Right, Luna?"

Luna nodded dazedly. "Of...of course," she agreed, still staring at Tia with wide eyes. She shook herself, then drained her coffee cup. "We...we'll need to get you some things. Clothes, a phone..."

"A computer," Celestia said. "She'll absolutely need a computer. I'll...I'll help you learn how to use your hands."

"Thank you," Tia said gratefully, frowning at her fingers. "It's...it's getting easier, just sitting here eating breakfast." She flexed her index finger experimentally, curled her hand into a fist, then spread it out flat. "I believe it will simply take practice."

"Would you like me to help you with your earrings now?" Celestia offered.

"Please," Tia said. "Also, would you mind putting my hair up for me the way it was last night? I rather liked it."

Celestia smiled. "Of course."

* * * * *

A half hour later, Tia, now wearing her earrings and necklace and with her hair back in a high ponytail, sat as the line judge and sole observer of what was, to her, a very confusing argument.

"A tablet would be more practical," Celestia said.

Luna slammed a fist on the kitchen table. "Tablets are for boring people who lack creativity!" Luna insisted. "Tia is obviously a very creative girl—"

"Thank you," Tia interjected primly.

"—so she needs a laptop!"

"We're not turning a magical pony princess into a gamer, Luna," Celestia said mildly.

"You think I just want somebody new to pwn?" Luna exclaimed incredulously. "I could pwn all of Canterlot in my sleep! I just think she needs more..." She flexed a bicep. "Muscle out of whatever we get for her! I mean, she clearly has a great deal to learn. Do you really think a dinky tablet is going to have enough memory and power?"

"I fail to see how a laptop provides more educational value than a tablet," Celestia said. "They both have equal access to the same information on the web—"

"Sister," Luna said patiently, "tablets suck."

"They most certainly do not!" Celestia said.

Luna began ticking points off on her fingers. "You've never gotten your tablet to work with our home printer or the school printers. Streaming video is garbage on a tablet. Memory is garbage on a tablet. Storage is garbage on a tablet. If Tia truly knows nothing about our world, she's going to need full cultural immersion just to fit in and not be branded a freak. That means movies, music, memes, everything. And how is she to learn how to use her hands without a proper keyboard to learn to type on?"

Celestia frowned. "Fair points," she admitted. "Still—"

"And," Luna said, waving her phone (Tia had at least learned what that particular device was called, if little else) at Celestia, "Blue Box is offering twenty percent off if you buy a laptop and a smartphone."

Celestia paused, frowning. "Contract?"

"Two year."

"What's the monthly?"

"Reasonable."

Celestia pursed her lips. "Tia? What do you think?"

Tia blinked. "I honestly have no idea what the two of you are talking about." She shifted slightly. "Umm...I don't know if I'm comfortable with the two of you spending what sounds like a significant amount of money on me."

Celestia waved her off airily. "Don't worry about it," she said. "We have more than enough money to support you, and...well..." She smiled sadly. "I've always wished I had a daughter to spoil. I just never made the time to start a family."

Tia nodded sympathetically. "I know what you mean," she said. "Over the centuries, I have had the occasional suitor, but have only ever been in love once, and that ended...awkwardly." She coughed. "I have, of course, adopted many fillies and colts over the years, attempting to fill the void, but I fear I have never been the best mother figure." She sighed. "As evidenced by the current situation with Sunset Shimmer."

"That reminds me," Celestia said, pulling out her own phone. She showed it to Tia. "Is this her?"

Tia blinked. "Yes, it...it certainly does look like her. Although she looks...different." She frowned as she scanned the surrounding text. "Missing teen? Suspected runaway? What—"

"It's a news article from two years ago," Celestia said. "I follow news reports of missing children from across the country. I'm a member of a volunteer watch of sorts that keeps an eye out for troubled teens who have run away from home. That's why the name Sunset Shimmer rang a bell."

"This Sunset Shimmer disappeared from her home in Fillydelphia two years ago," Luna said.

Tia frowned. "Then she is definitely the Sunset Shimmer native to this world," she said. "The Sunset Shimmer I chased through the portal has been my student for six years." She sighed. "I hope she's alright..."

Luna coughed. "We have a lot of shopping to do today," she said. "We should...we should really get going."

"And I need to get over to the school," Celestia said. "The paperwork never ends." She glanced at Luna. "I'll leave it up to you what to buy her," she said. "Just...use good judgment, alright?"

"Leave it to me," Luna said. "Come, Tia! Blue Box awaits."

Celestia tilted her head. "Shouldn't you go clothes-shopping first? Especially considering the, ahem, underwear situation?"

Luna smirked. "Think about the kind of person who works at Blue Box, sister," she said in a devious tone.

Celestia blinked...then groaned. "And this is why summer Luna is worst Luna," she muttered.

* * * * *

Ten minutes later, Luna's car backed out of the driveway, with Tia firmly belted into the passenger seat. "What exactly powers this carriage?" Tia wondered aloud. "I had suspected steam, but—"

Luna glanced askance at her. "Are you serious about being from some kind of storybook fantasy world?" she asked. "I mean, really."

"I have spoken nothing but the truth of my home and life," Tia said tersely. "I understand your skepticism, but I also grow weary of it."

"So if you're three thousand years old, why do you look like you're fifteen?"

Tia shook her head. "I don't know," she said. "I don't understand the magic that governs the portal. Not even Starswirl the Bearded fully understood how the portals worked, and he was the wizard who created them." She glanced at Luna curiously. "How old are you and Celestia?"

"I'm twenty-eight," Luna said. "Celestia is thirty-six."

"Well, the age difference between you is the same as the age difference between me and my sister," Tia said with a frown. "It is puzzling that I'm not an exact duplicate of this world's Celestia," she mused. "Then again, I've only encountered parallel versions of myself a handful of times. There are...usually differences." She shook her head. "Anyway, back to the carriage."

"Car," Luna said. "We just call them cars." She coasted to a stop at an intersection. "This car's a hybrid. It runs off either gas or a battery."

Tia gave her a blank look. Luna sighed as she turned right and continued on. "I guess your magical pony land doesn't have engines."

"Oh, we do have engines," Tia said. "Usually they run on steam. Most of our trains are powered by steam."

"Wow," Luna said in a dry, sardonic tone. "I've never even been on a steam train. I think they decommissioned the last steam locomotive about fifteen years ago. All the trains today are either diesel or electric."

"Ah, electricity!" Tia said in a bright tone. "That, I know! We have seven hydroelectric dams in Equestria, providing power transmission to most of our towns and cities." She paused, then added, "We don't use it for much, though. Mostly hospital equipment and some lighting. Oh, and refrigeration. Electric refrigerators are far more efficient. But apart from that, electricity is more a curiosity than anything."

"You're kidding," Luna said flatly, risking a perplexed stare at Tia. "Here, everything runs on electricity. We are quite literally helpless without it."

"That seems...dangerous," Tia said. "What happens if the electricity fails?"

"We wait for the power company to fix it," Luna said simply. "With increasing degrees of panic, fit-throwing, and so forth, depending on how addicted to technology we are."

"And if it can't be repaired?"

"I don't think that's even possible with today's technology," Luna said. She turned onto a much broader road which was densely packed with cars. Tia looked out the window with interest. Dozens of vehicles of all shapes, sizes, and colors whizzed past along three lanes of shimmering pavement. Even more vehicles, moving in the opposite direction, passed on a road that ran parallel to the one they were presently on; the two were separated by a series of grassy dividers surrounded by yellow-painted cement. Signs along the side of the road offered information—presumably; none of it made sense to Tia—as well as advertisements for various things.

"I really do have a lot to learn, it seems," Tia mused.

"Well, you have plenty of time," Luna said.

Fifteen minutes later, Luna pulled into the parking lot of a large building with a bright blue roof and a sign above the broad glass entrance which said 'BLUE BOX'. "And here we are," she said. "If Celestia asks, we did not come here first, alright?"

Tia rolled her eyes. "I don't understand why the two of you were arguing about which store to visit first. It seems...silly."

Once Luna found a parking place and turned off the motor, they got out of the car and walked to the entrance. Tia gaped up at the store. "This building is...rather large," she said.

"Well, it's an electronics and appliance store," Luna said. "It wouldn't be much of one if it were small." She glanced at Tia. "What, stores aren't very big in your magical horse land?"

Tia shook her head numbly. "The largest stores in Canterlot can accomodate maybe...twenty customers at a time, if that."

Luna snorted. "In that case, the mall's going to give you a heart attack." Shaking her head, she led the way through the glass doors, which slid open as the ladies approached.

Upon entering, a gangly man with pimply cream-colored skin and slicked-back brown hair walked up to them. He wore khakis, a blue polo shirt with the store logo, and round-framed black glasses. "Vice-Principal Luna!" he said in a high, nasally voice.

Luna smiled. "Giz," she said. "You graduated two years ago, you can just call me Ms. Luna now."

Giz chuckled. "Okay." He glanced at Tia, blinked, and looked again, his mouth hanging open. "Wha-what the...?"

"This is our younger cousin Tia," Luna said quickly. "I know, the resemblance to my sister is very striking, is it not? She's new in town and will be staying with us for a while. I'm afraid all of her baggage was lost, so we're replacing everything she owns today."

"I, uh, I see," Giz said distractedly. There was a faint blush to his cheeks.

Luna snapped her fingers sharply in his face. "We're here to pick up a laptop and a smartphone for Tia," she said briskly.

"Oh! Oh. Right." Giz cleared his throat. "What kind of, umm...what kind of laptop did you have in mind?" he asked Tia.

"Umm...I'm letting my cousin decide," Tia said. "I don't know a lot about, umm...such things."

"Well, if anybody knows their computers, it's Ms. Luna," Giz said with a chuckle. "Come on back, you probably know where what you want is better than I do."

Tia tuned out the conversation between the two, looking around the store with interest. There were many things on display on the shelves and on the walls, and they were all very...shiny. Things which looked similar to the objects her hosts had in their living room were displayed, with placards proclaiming their features and prices. Many of them were lit up from within and showed images—some moving, some still.

She found herself simply wandering around, gawking at everything, lost in a reverie. She was so caught up in her rubbernecking that she collided with someone, who let out a startled grunt.

She turned to see a pale-skinned girl with electric blue hair, oversized purple sunglasses, and a pair of seafoam-green headphones standing behind her. "Oh, I'm so sorry!" she said.

The girl gave her a thumbs-up and a grin, then wandered off, bobbing her head.

"New friend?" Luna asked from behind her. Tia turned around. Luna smirked and nodded toward the front. "We're all set," she said. "Gizmo's ringing us up and activating your phone."

Tia followed Luna to the front of the store, where Gizmo waited with a slender cardboard box with a handle on top and a small assortment of packaged items. They stood waiting while he did whatever he was doing; after a few minutes, he started putting things into a plastic bag and read off a rather alarming-sounding total to Luna. Luna slid a thin card through a slot, which beeped. Something behind the counter spit out two long, thin reams of paper, which Gizmo tore off and handed to Luna. He then smiled at Tia. "Enjoy your new phone and laptop, and welcome to Canterlot!"

"Thank you," Tia said as Luna picked up the cardboard box in one hand while handing Tia the plastic bag. They left the store and walked back to Luna's car; the back end popped open, and Luna placed everything inside, slamming the lid.

"Next stop, the mall," Luna said as they got into the car.

"I...don't know how money works in this world yet," Tia said, "but it sounds as though you just spent...quite a bit."

"Well, it wasn't exactly cheap," Luna admitted, "but like Celestia said, we're not hurting. Don't worry about it."

* * * * *

Tia stared in stunned shock. "Wh-what is...what is this?!"

Luna smirked. "Canterlot Mall."

Tia shook her head. "It's as big as my castle! Maybe bigger!"

Luna chuckled. "It is a castle, of sorts. A castle of retail shopping. Two hundred stores, though most of them sell worthless crap."

"How...how do you find anything in there?"

"Experience, browsing, the mall directory," Luna said airily. "Don't worry too much about it, though. We're only going to one place." She pointed to the nearest entrance; the wall surrounding it had a different appearance from the rest of the wall around it, a more muted blue-gray as opposed to the shining white with red brick trim of the rest of the mall. Tall indigo letters spelled out the logo "NAVY BLUE" above the glass doors and windows.

Inside, there were hundreds of racks and shelves of clothing, flowing in a veritable sea of color and cloth. Luna led Tia over to a long counter, where a smiling woman greeted them. Luna took the woman aside and spoke to her in hushed tones; the woman occasionally cast surprised glances at Tia, then worried at her lip as she spoke to Luna. This exchange went on for several minutes before the woman rooted around in a drawer and handed Luna a long, flexible measuring tape. Luna thanked her and led Tia through the back, down a corridor lined with curtained-off booths to either side. She knocked on the wall beside one, waited, then pulled back the curtain and ushered Tia inside. "Strip," she commanded. "All the way down."

Tia complied, removing every garment she had put on that morning. Luna approached her with the measuring tape, instructing her to move this way, turn that way, raise her arms, lower her arms, and more, all the while taking notes into her phone. When she was done, she picked up the panties Tia had put on that morning, checked something, and nodded. "Put these back on," she said. "After that, stay in here, keep that curtain closed. I'll be back shortly."

Tia put her panties back on and waited, shifting side to side uncomfortably. The tile floor chilled her bare feet.

Two minutes later, Luna walked back in, carrying a handful of odd-looking garments. "What are those?" Tia asked curiously.

"Bras," Luna said. "I worked it out so once we find one that fits, you can wear it while we finish shopping. The clerk here agreed to it since you're..." She shook her head. "Well, it's not important. Here, let me show you how this works."

Tia quickly caught on to the fact that the bra was designed to support and conceal her teats while restricting their movement. "I am a bit curious about these human teats," Tia said as Luna fastened the bra clasp at her back, then stepped in front of her to study her critically. "They seem...unnecessarily large, considering I have not, to my knowledge, had a foal recently."

"They're just like that," Luna said dismissively. "You get used to it." She smirked. "You'll get used to a lot of things." There was a vague, gleeful menace in that smirk that set Tia ill at ease. After a moment, Luna nodded in satisfaction, then clipped a small cardboard tag off the bra. "Okay, get dressed, we'll finish shopping."

Luna led Tia around the store. In addition to the bras, she selected several pairs of panties; Tia looked over the various pants, shirts, and skirts the store had, with Luna commenting on one or another item.

An hour later, they left Navy Blue with three huge bags of clothes. Tia now had a complete wardrobe of underwear, socks, jeans, shorts, skirts, tops, and four pairs of shoes. "This should hold you until closer to time for school to start," Luna said. "Celestia aims to enroll you in CHS. We'll go someplace a little less...clearance rack before then."

"Alright," Tia said. "So, are we done?"

"One more stop to make," Luna said as they put everything in the car. "The drug store. You'll need a few...things."

* * * * *

On the way home, Luna and Tia stopped to pick up pizza for lunch. The prospect of pizza was enticing to Tia; in Equestria, it was largely a Manehattan dish, and she had never actually had occasion to sample it.

When they pulled into the garage, Luna carried the pizza, breadsticks, and sodas they'd bought inside, while Tia took one bag of clothes and the cardboard box containing her laptop on her first trip. A second trip later, all the shopping was hauled into the house and laid out on Tia's bed.

"Let's plug your phone in and get it charging now," Luna said as she rooted around for paper plates. "We'll set up the laptop after lunch." She walked back to Tia's room and came back with a phone not unlike her own, with a metallic light blue back. Tia watched with interest as she connected a long, thin cord to the side of the phone, then attached the other end of the cord to one of the many beige panels on the walls.

"I've been meaning to ask about those little panels," Tia said.

Luna frowned. "You mean the power outlets?" she asked. "I thought you said your horse world has electricity."

"It does, but I haven't seen anything like that," Tia said.

Luna's brow furrowed. "So how do you get electricity where it needs to go?"

"Through the air?" Tia said, now feeling confused herself. "The coils transmit the power, it carries to the edge of transmission range..."

Luna's eyes widened. "YOUR WORLD HAS WIRELESS ELECTRICITY?!" Her jaw dropped. "They've been trying to make that a viable technology here for over a century!"

"That's simply how it's always worked in Equestria," Tia said with a shrug. "Of course, unicorn magic is involved."

Luna's shoulders slumped. "Of course it is," she muttered. "Well, let's eat."

Luna carried the pizza, breadsticks, sodas, and paper plates over to the living room table and flopped down on the sofa. Tia joined her. "That pizza smells good," she commented.

"Guess you don't have that in horse world either," Luna said.

"We do, but I've never had the opportunity to try it. I don't get up to Manehattan very often, and Canterlot's culinary guilds..." Tia grimaced. "They're...particular about what sort of establishments are allowed within the city. The only time I've ever exerted my authority over their wishes was to allow a donut shop to open in Canterlot."

Luna shook her head. "Okay then." She opened the box and revealed the cheesy bounty within: a pepperoni pan pizza. She grabbed a slice for herself; Tia did likewise, placing it on her own plate. Luna divided up the breadsticks between them and gave Tia one of the two cups of dipping sauce. With food in front of her, she settled back in the couch. "Let's see what's on TV today," she said, picking up the remote from the table beside her and pointing it across the room.

The most prominent of the multitude of strange objects in the room came to life, showing a man walking back and forth in front of a map that had large green and yellow blobs moving across it. Luna frowned. "Oh great, it's going to be rainy later this week," she muttered.

Tia blinked. "Is this...a movie screen of some sort?"

"It's a television," Luna said. "It's how we get most of our news and entertainment here." She pressed a button on the remote, and the weather forecast was replaced by a couple engaged in an act of passion.

Tia stared. "This is entertainment?"

"Some people think so," Luna said. "Bah, I don't feel like channel-surfing." She pressed another button, and the scandalous images moved to one corner of the screen. The rest of the screen was filled with a grid that listed times, channel numbers, and what Tia assumed to be descriptions of the available choices. Luna evidently saw something that caught her fancy, because after a moment, the image changed to two men in cloaks circling one another, holding swords made of light. Luna turned to Tia with a smirk. "Now it's a movie screen," she said before taking a large bite of pizza.

Tia watched intently as she took a bite of her own pizza. Her eyes widened. "Oh...oh my," she said. "This...this is wonderful!"

Luna grinned. "Pizza is one of the best dishes ever invented," she said. "It's a little on the fattening side and all the grease isn't good for you, but what is these days?"

Tia laughed softly. "I've often found the most delicious things are the ones that are the most fattening." She grimaced. "Although one photo printed out of context in one newspaper can lead to...disastrous situations."

"Oh?" Luna asked.

"Suffice to say I've picked up the rather embarrassing nickname 'Cakelestia', and there are rumors floating around that my diet consists of cake, cake, and more cake," Tia said as she took another bite of pizza. "What are these little round things? Is it more meat?"

"Pepperoni," Luna said. "And yes, it's meat, but don't ask what's in it. For one thing, nobody really knows. For another, nobody wants to know." She picked an errant slice of pepperoni off her plate and popped it into her mouth. "Sometimes, ignorance is bliss." At Tia's forlorn glance, she added, "All anyone knows for certain is that it is allegedly mostly pork and beef. It just doesn't come from, shall we say, prime cuts."

Tia tilted her head in confusion, then shrugged. "I suppose part of adapting is not asking questions I'm probably better off not knowing the answers to," she decided before taking another bite of pizza. "As long as I don't develop an unsavory meat addiction by the time I'm able to return to Equestria, I can deal with eating meat here."

"That's the spirit!"

Tia winced as the action on the screen took a particularly violent turn. "So...what exactly are we looking at here?"

"It'd take longer to explain than there is time left in this movie," Luna said. She glanced at Tia. "You seem to know what movies are," she said. "You asked if this was a movie screen."

Tia nodded. "We have moving pictures in Equestria," she said. "They're a fairly recent thing. I don't pretend to understand how the technology works. It's one of many inventions a stallion named Time Turner has come up with."

"Time Turner," Luna repeated. "Brown hair, Trottingham accent, talks very fast, sometimes acts as though he's much older than he looks?"

"That's him," Tia said. "Most who know him just call him Doctor."

"He teaches physics at CHS," Luna said absently.

"I have to admit, though, movies in Equestria are nowhere near this level of...anything," Tia said as she watched one of the men perform an impossible leap. "They're essentially just plays filmed in places other than on a stage."

"They're serious business here," Luna said. "Hundreds of millions of dollars are spent filming a single movie, special effects technology for films is some of the most advanced technology in the world..." She dunked a breadstick into marinara sauce. "The movie industry makes more money and wastes more money every year than some nations."

The movie ended on what Tia could only assume was a depressing note, having missed most of it and not knowing what was going on in general. As it ended, another movie started immediately; she settled in, enjoying the pizza and breadsticks and making idle conversation with Luna as they watched. This one was far less elaborate than the one preceding it, but still more sophisticated than anything Tia had ever seen. The story followed a teenager who had just moved to a new town, only to fall prey to a gang of bullies. The elderly maintenance man at the apartment building where he lived taught him to defend himself, and a confrontation with the martial arts instructor for the bullies ultimately led to the protagonist facing off against his tormentors in a tournament.

By the time the movie ended, they had finished off all the food, and Tia was feeling full and lethargic. Yet another movie seemed ready to start, but Luna changed the channel again; it only took Tia a moment to realize that the new program being displayed was a weather forecast.

"Well," Luna said, standing up with a grunt, "I think it's time you start learning how to use a computer. Help me clear the table, then we'll get your new laptop out and I'll start teaching you."

"Alright," Tia agreed.

* * * * *

Celestia managed to get loose from the office at half past four, which was two hours longer than she'd intended to work on a blazing hot July day. "I wish school principals got to enjoy their summer as much as certain other people," she muttered to herself as she waited for her car's sluggish air conditioner to cool the scorching interior of the car. Even though the outside temp was only in the mid-eighties, the sun was strong, and the inside of her car was well over a hundred degrees. She'd checked in with Luna during the day, and no problems seem to have arisen with Tia.

On the way home, she stopped to pick up a frozen lasagna for dinner, as well as a loaf of garlic bread and a couple cartons of ice cream.

When Celestia walked through the door, she heard Tia's hauntingly familiar voice coming from the living room.

"Unicorns and pegasi are mythical here...humans think 'alicorn' means what? That's just silly..."

"What's it say?" Luna asked.

"This thing says you humans think 'alicorn' just refers to a unicorn's horn or the substance it's made from," Tia said. "That's...that's absurd."

"So what does it mean, miss horse princess?" Luna said in a snarky tone.

"That's...actually exactly what it means," Tia replied. "Alicorns are ponies with the magic of a unicorn, the wings of a pegasus, and the strength of an earth pony. Also, very long life spans. Not...usually on the same level as my sister and I, granted, we're special cases, but Mother was over five hundred years old when she passed into the Elysian Fields."

Celestia raised an eyebrow at that as she set down the groceries on the kitchen table. "Classical mythology?" she asked.

"Ah, sister! Welcome back. I didn't hear you come in."

Celestia walked into the living room, where Luna was watching the news while Tia sat cross-legged on the sofa, engrossed in her new laptop. "So, I trust everything went well today?" she asked.

"Yes," Tia replied. "I'm already learning a great deal about this world." She sighed. "Mostly, I'm learning how much I have to learn about this world."

Celestia chuckled. "Well, between the two of us and the Internet, I'm confident you'll learn quickly."

"Well, if nothing else, learning about your world will pass the time," Tia said. "And as concerned as I am about the state of Equestria, not to mention the matter of Sunset Shimmer...I have to confess I'm excited to have an entire new world of information at my fingertips."

"Well, I'm glad to hear some enthusiasm about learning," Celestia said. "You have slightly less than three months to get up to speed for the start of the next school year."

"Are you sure about enrolling her in CHS, Celestia?" Luna asked. "I mean—"

"I believe it is for the best," Celestia said. "Besides, if that statue at the school is a magical portal to her world, would it not make sense to put her in a position to keep a close eye on it?"

"That's true," Tia said. "The first thing I learned once Luna showed me how this Internet of yours works is that in this world, magic is..." She grimaced. "Mostly fiction. Which means my best hope for returning to Equestria before thirty moons pass is if Cadance and the unicorn scholars of Canterlot find a way to breach the portal." She sighed again. "Otherwise, I'm stuck here for the duration, and...and I can only pray that my subjects can find a way to survive without me."

"Well, surely a council of intelligent, civic-minded, err...ponies...can manage to keep your kingdom from falling apart for a couple of years," Celestia said.

Tia gave her a sad look. "You don't understand," she said. "I haven't researched how the sun and moon work in your world yet, but in Equestria, I personally am responsible for the beginning and end of each day and night. The spells the ancient unicorns used to do what I have done for millennia are lost to the ages. If Cadance can't somehow master the heavens without my guidance, Equestria's sky is stuck where it was when I left."

Celestia blinked. "Seriously? Well...what time of day was it when you, err, departed your world?"

"Twilight," Tia said.

"Oh dear," Celestia said after a pause. "Well..." She fumbled for anything encouraging to say, then gave up and shook her head. "I picked up a lasagna for dinner," she said. "I'm going to get dinner started early because I'm starving, is that alright with you girls?"

"Works for me," Luna said. "Those things take an hour to cook anyway."

"I'm looking forward to sampling more of this world's excellent cuisine," Tia chipped in.

* * * * *

Late in the evening, with a belly full of the heaviest pasta dish she'd ever eaten and a mind full of new information, new possibilities, and a whirlwind of fears, concerns, and anxieties, Tia changed into a nightgown and slipped into bed.

Elsewhere in the house, Celestia and Luna were having a last bowl of ice cream before bed as they watched the latest update on the storm front approaching the area. "She's imaginative, I'll give her that," Luna said.

"You're still skeptical of her claims?"

"Aren't you?"

"Hmm." Celestia ran her spoon through a swirl of chocolate syrup before spooning some mocha ice cream up and bringing it to her lips. "Let's just say for now, I'd rather accept that everything she's told us is the truth and do whatever I can to help her than waste energy on cynicism and doubt. Besides, if she truly is from another world, we have as much to learn from her as she does from us. Isn't that exciting?"

Luna rolled her eyes. "Well, you certainly both share the same annoying enthusiasm for learning," she said.

Celestia stared at her. "How can you, an educator, be so...dismissive of a thirst for knowledge?"

"I'm an administrator, not an educator," Luna pointed out. "And I encourage learning, of course, in all the students who pass through CHS. I just think some people are a little too invested in learning for the sake of learning."

Celestia pursed her lips. "Ah, yes. I had forgotten those six years you insisted on calling me 'Nerdlestia'." She stuck her tongue out at her sister.

Luna smirked, then dipped her spoon into her bowl. "I just...don't know what to make of her yet, I guess," she said. "Regardless of whether or not I believe her story, it's hard to fake her level of ignorance about, well...everything. At the very least, she clearly desperately needs our help."

"That much, we are in complete agreement on," Celestia said. "And if it turns out she truly is, as she claims, a magical talking equine princess?"

Luna paused, pondering that, then shrugged. "Dibs on her laptop when she goes home?"

Celestia rolled her eyes. "Finish up and get some sleep," she said. "We've got a long day tomorrow."

"We do?"

Celestia smirked. "You'll see..."

Book One, Chapter 2 (Side Sunset)

"This body actually does that?" Sunset wondered aloud with a disgusted grimace. "That's actually a thing girls do here? Gross!"

It was just past six in the morning. The sky outside was already beginning to glow with the early hues of daybreak, and Sunset had been awake for almost an hour. As soon as the disoriented fog of sleep had cleared from her brain, she had picked up her tablet and resumed her studies.

Given everything she'd experienced the day before, she decided that human physiology was top priority for today, and that meant brushing up on parts of the human body, differences between male and female anatomy, and—presently—feminine intimate health, a subject she had become acutely aware of through context links in other articles.

She had just finished reading about menstruation. The idea of regularly experiencing cramps and bleeding from her sexual organs filled her with disgust and dread.

On the plus side, at least she finally knew what breasts were. And why they thought she'd be more concerned about having bruised one. She'd also discovered, through...less clinical research...more about the real importance of breasts in human culture and society, and that she had evidently hit a particularly perverse jackpot in her transformation into a human. Her new body came with a devastating psychological weapon. She couldn't wait to use it.

But first, she had more pressing concerns. Setting down her tablet, she gingerly levered herself off the bed, took hold of her IV stand, and crossed over to the bathroom. Fumbling for the light switch just inside, she turned it on, then approached the toilet.

She set her mouth in a determined line, hiked up her gown, and sat down.

After relieving herself, she carefully cleaned herself, then washed her hands and left the bathroom. The sky was brighter now; she walked back over to the bed. Her ribs were starting to hurt. As soon as she was back in bed, she pressed the nurse call button.

In less than three minutes, Sugar Pill—the curly-haired nurse from the previous day—entered. "Good morning, sweetie!" she said. "Do you need help going to the bathroom?"

"I already went," Sunset said. "I just need some ice for my ribs."

Sugar Pill blinked. "You went? By yourself?"

Sunset smiled gamely. "When you gotta go, right?"

Sugar Pill giggled. "Alright. Let me go get you an ice pack." As she left the room, she paused to check the bathroom, then glanced back at Sunset, eyes wide in surprise, before heading out.

Sunset smirked.

As soon as Sugar Pill returned with the ice pack and went through the routine of checking up on her, Sunset picked her tablet back up and pursed her lips, trying to decide what to look up next. Her earlier information binge had been driven by specific cues and acknowledged gaps. Now, she had to decide what to look for information about next, and nothing seemed to stick out in her mind.

She glanced up at the TV, reached for the remote, and turned it on. There was a man in an expensive suit giving an impassioned speech about...something or other, it made no sense to her. She thought about flipping through the channels idly again as she had done the day before.

She paused, glancing at her tablet.

The Internet had a lot of information. What if...

After a few false starts, she found what she was looking for: a schedule of programs whose channel numbers matched what she'd seen before. "Basic cable," she murmured, brow furrowed in thought. "Let's see...television transmission is divided into...terrestrial wireless signal transmission, cable transmission, and satellite transmission, whatever the hay that is." Having a program schedule turned out to not be very useful when she had no idea what the programs actually were, so she opted to tune into a morning news program.

During the hour before breakfast arrived, Sunset continued her research, beginning with learning the difference between the three major forms of television transmission. As she read, she kept half an ear open to the news; occasionally, she would look up something that was talked about on television. Breakfast today was different from yesterday's offering, consisting of a large, flaky, buttery croissant, two strips of crispy bacon, more of those slightly off scrambled eggs, and a bowl of thin, watery farina. There was also a small fruit cup with some peaches in heavy syrup, as well as the same milk and orange juice from the day before. There were salt and pepper packets, sugar packets, and a packet of strawberry cream cheese spread. The latter was obviously meant for the croissant, but as Sunset looked her breakfast over, she decided the farina probably needed it more, so she carefully opened the perforated notch at the end and squeezed the entire tube into it, then stirred it with her spoon. For good measure, she added sugar as well, then carefully emptied the salt and pepper onto her eggs.

"Getting better at this," she mused happily to herself as she ate. The bacon had an interesting taste to it; once she was done eating, she decided to look up bacon on the Internet to find out what the difference was between bacon here and bacon in Equestria.

By the time they came to clear her tray, Sunset knew just how much animal flesh she'd consumed in the past day, to say nothing of what animals humans routinely consumed. It took her a good half hour to wrestle with the implications, but further research told her animals in this world—including equines, which mercifully were not normally used for food—were not sapient, and humans had been hunting animals for food and, later, raising them as livestock since the beginning of recorded history.

*Well, Sunset...you're human now, so if that's what humans do,* she told herself. Besides, her stomach and taste buds certainly weren't complaining.

Unbidden, a mental image of the now-human Celestia entered her mind, scowling disapprovingly at her for participating in anything as barbaric as eating meat. *Oh, shut up, you old nag, you're in the same boat I'm in.* The mental image of a disapproving Celestia changed to one of Celestia salivating over a hapless cow, knife and fork clenched in her hands. Sunset giggled.

"You're in a good mood this morning."

It was the young doctor from the day before. She coughed, suppressing her giggle fit. "Just...a silly thought," she said.

"Well, nothing wrong with that," the doctor said. He glanced at the TV and rolled his eyes. "The news again?"

Sunset shrugged. "I don't remember what I used to watch on TV, or if I even watched TV at all," she said. "I checked the schedule, but I don't even know what any of the shows they have on this morning are, so..." She gestured vaguely.

"Hmm." The doctor examined his tablet, brow furrowed. "Yyyyyeah, I see where you appear to be having some memory trouble that's not related to any injury." He gave her a mock-stern look. "You sure you're not just faking it for sympathy?"

Now it was Sunset's turn to roll her eyes. "Do I look like the kind of girl who'd do that?"

The doctor shrugged. "Honestly, you look like the kind of girl guys like me used to have crushes on in high school. The kind of girl that isn't very nice about shooting you down in the middle of the hallway, where all the other kids can hear and point and laugh..." He trailed off, ducking his gaze. "I, uhh...I'll just be...rounds." He turned and left the room in a rush.

Sunset raised an eyebrow. "That was weird." Shaking her head, she turned her attention back to the news, which had just segued into the weather forecast. Fluffy Clouds was back on, and he looked excited and a bit harassed.

"Well, folks, you know what they say about the weather," Fluffy Clouds said with a chuckle. "Our five-day forecast has changed significantly ever since a storm front decided to develop over the plains yesterday. That storm system should be moving in around Thursday; heavy rains, strong, gusty winds, and thunder are on tap from Thursday around noon to late Friday. The system should make its way out of our area overnight Friday, so the weekend will be partly cloudy and humid..."

Sunset tuned the rest of the weather forecast out. She picked up her tablet, intent on doing more research, but found that her eyes were tired and blurry. "Ugh," she muttered. "Been reading this thing too long..." She closed her Internet browser and studied the assorted apps on her tablet. Her gaze lingered on the Music app. "Hmm..."

She glanced at the TV, which was now droning on about financial news. She turned down the volume on the TV, then tapped the Music app.

You have no music in your Library.
You can add music through the Music Store or start your 90-day free trial of BlueTunes, which streams a wide selection of music to your device wherever, whenever. Choose your favorite genre, your favorite band, or just tune in to one of our many Internet radio streams! Like what you hear? Buy it and download it to your device with one touch! Start your free trial of BlueTunes now?

Sunset thought about that for a minute, then shrugged. "Well, if it's a free trial..."

She touched 'Yes'.

Congratulations! Your free trial of BlueTunes has started. You now have access to tens of thousands of songs from every genre of music! Enjoy!
Note: In order to purchase music, a payment method must be associated with your account.

"I'll talk to Mom and Dad about that later," Sunset muttered as she studied the screen that popped up next. It was full of little video thumbnails, news blurbs, categories, and music stream titles. On a whim, she touched 'Classic Hits'. After a brief loading period, the tablet's small but powerful speakers burst to life with a fast drum beat and hard, fast guitar rhythms. A male singer crooned over the loud, aggressive music. A glance at the screen told Sunset she was listening to a band called 'Nipmuc', whatever that meant.

Sunset knew what rock and roll was. Her distant aunt Stormy Flare would often bring her pegasus cousin Spitfire whenever she visited, and Spitfire always brought rock records with her. *At least, she used to...before I stopped taking visitors...* Rock and roll was an interesting thing; it was so different from the stuffy string quartets and chamber music of Canterlot. The ponies who played it and the ponies who listened to it were enjoying themselves without caring how loud, obnoxious, or strange they sounded.

Sunset nodded her head along with the beat; when the song began to fade out, she tapped the little button on the screen that said 'More from this artist'. Another Nipmuc song started, and Sunset laid the tablet in her lap, idly tapping her toes under the sheets to the beat of the music.

She'd listened to several songs when Dr. Swab came in to check on her. "Well, you look like you're having fun," he said.

Sunset nodded. "I've never just sat and listened to music for this long before," she said. "Especially not this."

"Well, I have to say you've got good taste," Dr. Swab said. "Nipmuc got me through every study session for every exam I ever took in college and medical school." He checked some things on his tablet. "How are your ribs?"

"Still sore, but I've figured out how not to aggravate them."

Dr. Swab nodded. "And your memory problems?"

Sunset shook her head. "Still nothing. I spent most of the night just using the Internet to figure out where the heck I even am."

Dr. Swab pressed his lips into a thin line. "Well, you seem to remember how to do that at least."

Sunset shook her head. "Learned how last night, from the instruction manual that came with the tablet. And from Mom and Dad, of course."

"Ah." Dr. Swab nodded thoughtfully. "Well, listen. This afternoon, after your session with Dr. Slate, I've got you scheduled for one more test. We're going to do an MRI just to make sure there isn't something going on the CT scan missed. After that..." He glanced at his clipboard. "I think we're going to keep you for observation until about Friday, give you time to talk to Dr. Slate a little more, eat a little more of our world-class hospital food...use the hell out of our hospital wi-fi, apparently," he added with a smirk. "After that, I think you'll be good to go home, but you'll have to go to your family doctor once a week or so until those ribs are good and healed, and Dr. Slate might want you to follow up with a therapist every week or so. That sound good?"

Sunset shrugged. "Whatever I gotta do," she said. "All I care about right now is starting over."

"Good girl," Dr. Swab said, clapping her on the shoulder. "Well, I'll let you get back to your Nipmuc now. Dr. Slate should be in to see you in about...an hour and a half, looks like, and they'll get you for that MRI later this afternoon." He tapped his tablet a couple of times, then left the room.

Sunset smiled, picked up her tablet, and opened her Internet browser, feeling she'd given her eyes enough rest. It was time to get back to work.

* * * * *

When Sunset's parents arrived at the hospital, they were met by Dr. Swab. "How's she doing today, Doctor?" Desert Sunrise asked.

"Better, it seems," Dr. Swab said. "I just checked in on her about an hour ago, she's in good spirits. Still claims she doesn't remember anything. She has a session with Dr. Slate in about an hour, but I'm sure she's looking forward to seeing you." He checked his tablet, then added, "by the way, we're having some difficulty getting her medical records from Fillydelphia."

Desert frowned. "Is that a problem?"

"Well, not especially," Dr. Swab said. "It's really more for our files. We just need to know if there's anything in particular we should be aware of."

Satin shrugged. "Not really," she said. "Up until she...left, Sunset almost never got sick. I mean, other than the usual things kids go through. She wasn't on any medication, she didn't have allergies..." She looked at Desert. "Right?"

Desert scratched his cheek. "As far as I can remember," he said.

"I figured as much," Dr. Swab said. "She's as healthy as a horse, but I just wanted to double-check." He smiled reassuringly. "Go on back and see her. Last I checked, she'd found the music app on her tablet."

Satin's lips quirked in a smile. "Oh dear. That'll get expensive."

Desert chuckled. "I don't mind." Putting an arm around his wife and nodding to the doctor, he headed down the hall to Sunset's room.

They found her absorbed in the tablet, nodding her head along to the beat of some rock song. "Good morning, dear!" Satin called.

Sunset looked up and smiled. "Hey," she said. She tapped the tablet twice, and the music stopped.

"How're you feeling?" Satin asked.

"Pretty good," Sunset said. "Still sore."

Desert reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a smartphone, which he handed to Sunset. "Brought you another little something," he said.

Sunset's eyes lit up as she took it. "Thank you!"

"It's already charged," Satin said as she dug the charger out of her handbag. "I spent last night setting some things up on it, putting our numbers in, installing some apps." She handed Sunset a slip of paper. "There's the lock code."

Sunset studied it, then took a moment to figure out how to wake up and unlock the phone. She glanced over the apps. "Not too different from the tablet," she said.

"It can do a lot of the same things," Desert said. "I'll need to sync a few things for you since I get the feeling you'll be wanting to download music."

Sunset laughed. "Yeah, I sorta found the music app," she said. "That's okay, right?"

"Of course it is," Desert said. "Don't go too overboard, though. I'll set that up for you too, maybe figure out a monthly allowance for music and videos."

"Thanks."

A brief silence descended as Sunset familiarized herself with her new phone. Satin coughed. "Do you...do you remember anything? Is there anything you want to talk about?"

Sunset looked up and shook her head, frowning slightly. "Sorry," she said. "I wish I did."

Satin and Desert both looked slightly disappointed, but smiled reassuringly. "It's...it's alright," Satin said. "Maybe it's for the best if we all just start over."

Sunset smiled. "I'd like that," she said.

They talked for a while about different things, with Satin telling Sunset about the house they lived in now, and Sunset asking questions about school and a few things she'd looked up on the Internet. They'd been talking for a good forty minutes when they were interrupted by a knock on the door. "Come in," Sunset called.

A balding, paunchy man with pale gray skin and dark charcoal hair walked into the room. "Hope I'm not intruding," he said. "Hello, Sunset! How are we feeling today?"

"Better," Sunset said. "Mom, Dad, this is Dr. Slate."

Satin made to rise. "We'll just wait in the cafeteria until you're—"

Dr. Slate raised a hand to stall her. "No need," he said. "Actually, I'd prefer the two of you stay for today's session. If that's okay with you, Sunset?"

"Of course," Sunset said with a smile. She set her tablet aside and folded her hands atop her table.

Dr. Slate was looking at his own tablet. "Have you remembered anything new?" he asked.

Sunset shook her head. "Sorry. Still a total blank."

Dr. Slate nodded. "For the record, tell me exactly what you know about yourself and your family."

Sunset's brow furrowed. "My name is Sunset Shimmer. I'm fifteen years old. My parents are Desert Sunrise and Sunset Satin. Two nights ago I was hit by my dad's car, and I woke up here in this hospital. We're in Canterlot." She swallowed. "Apparently, two years ago I ran away from home." She shook her head. "That's everything."

"No memories of the first thirteen years of your life, no knowledge of where you've been for the last two years?"

Sunset shook her head again, frowning. "I don't know anything," she repeated. "I don't remember where I've been, or what my home looked like, or what the neighborhood was like. I don't remember if I had any friends." She shrugged and waved a hand vaguely at the television. "I don't know what any of the shows on TV are. I see things advertised—foods, sodas, candy, all kinds of stuff—and I can't remember ever having used any of it." She looked down at her hands. "All I remember is running," she said in a soft, sad tone.

Desert and Satin took each other's hands and squeezed them tightly.

Dr. Slate nodded, then leaned forward. "Are you absolutely sure?" he asked. "You're sure there's nothing else you remember? At all? Try."

Sunset closed her eyes, her brow furrowing. After a moment, she shook her head. "I remember a white horse," she said. She opened her eyes. "That's it."

"A white horse?" Dr. Slate asked, raising an eyebrow. At Sunset's nod, he continued, "Where did you see the white horse?"

"I don't remember."

"Were you running from the white horse?"

"I'm not sure," Sunset said. "I might have been." She shook her head. "It's all I can remember."

Desert frowned. "A white horse..." He scratched his nose. "I hit Sunset not too far from Canterlot High School. Could the white horse be that statue out front?"

Dr. Slate scratched his chin. "It could be," he said. "Sunset?"

Sunset shrugged helplessly. "Like I said, I don't really remember."

"Mm-hmm." Dr. Slate wrote on his tablet for a minute. "By the way, I hear you seem to be more comfortable in your skin today. Yesterday, I was hearing reports of you having trouble with basic tasks like opening sugar packets and using the bathroom."

Sunset grimaced. "Yeah, I don't know what was going on with me yesterday," she said. "I guess today I just feel more...human."

"Well, we all have those off days," Dr. Slate said blandly. "Now, Sunset, I have one more very important question for you."

Sunset folded her hands and waited patiently.

"When you're released from the hospital, what is it you hope to do?"

Sunset shrugged. "Go home, get to know Mom and Dad all over again, start my life all over." She grimaced. "Probably spend all day every day studying if I ever plan to go back to school. I was on the Internet all night and everything I read was new to me."

"But you do remember how to read," Dr. Slate asked.

Sunset nodded. "Of course."

Dr. Slate's brow furrowed. "What's seven plus nine?"

"Sixteen."

"Five times twelve?"

"Sixty."

"Square root of eighty-one?"

"Nine."

"Hmm." Dr. Slate made some more notes, then drummed his fingers on the armrest of his chair. He glanced at his watch. "Well, they'll be bringing your lunch any minute, and your MRI is scheduled for after lunch. I do have one or two more patients to check on, so I think I'll get out of your hair for now. I'll see you again tomorrow, okay?"

Sunset nodded.

Dr. Slate stood and looked at Sunset's parents. "If you two wouldn't mind, I'd like to meet with you later today...let's say around two? Just ask for my office at reception."

"Of course," Desert said.

Dr. Slate smiled reassuringly. "I just want to ask some questions to compare the Sunset you knew before she ran away to the Sunset we have with us now," he said. "Just to get a general grasp of the whole picture." With that, he left.

Desert checked his watch. "I think we should go grab lunch ourselves," he told Satin. "We'll be back later this afternoon, okay?"

Sunset nodded. "I'll be here," she said.

* * * * *

Fifteen minutes past two, Desert and Satin sat across from Dr. Slate, who was scrolling through his notes, his face impassive. Satin wrung her hands nervously; Desert fidgeted uncomfortably.

After far too long, Dr. Slate sighed and looked up. "There are two possibilities here," he said. "She's telling the truth and she really has no memories of her life, or she's lying."

Desert slumped a little in his seat. "That's all you have to say?" he asked testily.

Dr. Slate frowned. "That's how it breaks down, Mr. Sunrise," he said. "Honestly, going by the observations I have from Nurse Pill and Dr. Wiener, I'm inclined to believe she's telling the truth. Dissociative amnesia..." He leaned back in his chair and sighed. "It's a tricky thing." He steepled his fingers atop his generous belly. "Malingerers always have telltale signs of deception. Sometimes those signs are an absence of signs. The things a polygraph would pick up, certain eye movements, anything a scared kid trying to stay out of trouble..." He shook his head. "Things you don't even need to have training to read. In a girl Sunset's age, you'd normally see those signs if she were putting on an act, unless she's exceptionally clever. In which case, you'd see anything but those signs." He looked at his notes again. "What I'm seeing here and what I've observed from talking to her is telling me something else entirely. I'm seeing a girl who has forgotten civilization. She's a lot more savvy today than she was yesterday, but I asked the nurses to keep an eye on her, and she's been using that tablet you got her almost nonstop. Not to play games or watch videos, but to read. She's studying."

"Studying what?" Satin asked. "Studying how to pretend to have amnesia?"

"I think it's more..." Dr. Slate shrugged. "You heard about her bathroom incident, right? And how she seems to have come in here lacking certain basic daily skills."

"So we heard," Desert said, frowning. "My wife is even convinced Sunset didn't know how to open a soda bottle on her own yesterday."

Dr. Slate nodded. "Well, a lot of those little signs are markers of a type of dissociative amnesia we informally call Ape Boy Syndrome. It's the complete breakdown of any remembrance of civilization and self, a regression to a feral state. You see it in very young survivors of plane or ship crashes, or occasionally in homeless people with dementia. The problem here is that Sunset speaks clearly, recognizes the two of you, knows her own name, and clearly has not lost the skills to read and understand complex concepts." He sighed. "I've honestly never heard of a case that matches her specific situation. There's no discernible head trauma, she's physically in perfect condition aside from the injuries that put her in here in the first place, but for all intents and purposes, it's almost as if she's relearning how to be human." He shrugged. "She could still be faking this whole thing, but at this point, that tablet gives her an alibi that makes any inconsistency in her story impossible to catch."

Satin frowned. "Should we not have given it to her?"

Dr. Slate shook his head. "I'm not saying that at all. If anything, that was the best thing for her, since she's using it to learn. The only problem there is that because she's using it to fill in a lot of blanks, and because she's astoundingly sharp-minded, I don't think it's possible to tell whether or not her amnesia is real anymore. Like I said, either it's real and all she needs to do is learn how to be Sunset Shimmer again, or she's faking it for reasons we may never know." He spread his hands in a gesture of helplessness. "My official, professional recommendation? You've got your daughter back. God knows that in and of itself is a miracle. There are thousands of runaways whose families will never see them again, will never know what happened to them. I'm sure at least half of them wind up in the morgue, nameless and forgotten."

Desert and Satin shifted uneasily. "So...we should just give up? On ever knowing what really happened?"

Dr. Slate shrugged. "That's up to you. Should she continue to see a therapist once she leaves the hospital? Absolutely. I'd say once a week until September, then see where it goes from there. But until she's ready to remember—or admit to remembering—where she's been and what she's been doing for the last two years, there isn't anything anyone can do. There's no magic mind fix button for something like this. The cure has to come from inside her. And it may never come. You may have to accept that the person sitting in that bed is not the same person who disappeared two years ago. That may be a completely different Sunset Shimmer with a radically different personality, different moods, different interests, different behavior. Who she was before, whatever it is she's running from, that's gone. It could come back with time, or it could be gone forever." He stared intently at the two people sitting across from him. "I cannot stress this enough: do not try to 'force' her back to 'normal'. Don't try to trick her into slipping up and revealing a memory. Don't try to coerce her into telling you something. Let her be, and if she remembers—if she wants to remember, and if she wants to tell you or her therapist the truth—it has to come from her. It has to be something she is willing to do."

Desert and Satin exchanged an discomfited glance.

"So what you're saying," Desert said slowly, "is that we've got our daughter back, but the last fifteen years of her life are just gone? Just like that? She's starting over again?"

"Essentially, yes."

Satin took her husband's hand and squeezed it. "Maybe...this is for the best," she said. "A clean start for all of us."

Desert sighed. "You're probably right..."

* * * * *

The remainder of the week passed relatively quickly. Between long visits from her parents, the MRI (which had been an interesting experience), sessions with Dr. Slate, and visits from the various doctors and nurses for one thing or another, Sunset had continued her studies online, listened to more music—she discovered several more rock bands she liked, a few pop singers she could tolerate, and developed an intense loathing for rap—and started learning more about what was popular on television, taking care to pay closer attention to the currently airing programs, as well as watching a few older movies that were repeated on the cable channels. Thursday saw heavy rain and thunderstorms; Sunset watched the rain lash against the window and the lightning flash bright in the dark sky.

It was still raining Friday afternoon when Dr. Swab brought Sunset's discharge papers for her parents to sign. That police officer had shown up again and had had a heated exchange with Desert Sunrise, but someone from the hospital staff had shown up with a stack of affidavits for Sunset and her parents to sign, and once Dr. Slate signed off on her release, whatever legal hangups remained concerning her "runaway" status evidently dissolved, because the officer left with a terse apology.

"What was up his butt?" Sunset wondered.

Dr. Swab shook his head. "He thinks you're playing everyone for fools, doesn't believe your story. Thing is, the rest of us just want you back with your family and there really isn't one good reason to keep that from happening, so he has to file an incomplete report and get chewed out by his supervisor." He smiled gently. "None of which is your problem. You just focus on getting your life back in order."

Sunset nodded. "Okay."

Sunset was wheeled out of the hospital at just past four and helped into her parents' car, wearing a new shirt and jeans her mother had bought her, as well as the jacket and boots she had come out of the portal in—the jacket had taken a bit of a beating, but still looked good. She'd been advised against wearing a bra for a few weeks, which was fine with her; she still needed to learn how to deal with human undergarments.

By the time they pulled into the driveway of a medium-sized suburban house, the rain had let up, leaving the streets slick and the sky gloomy grey. Sunset got out of the car and looked the house over; it was a one-story brick affair with a few shade trees in the front and a nice flower garden. Once they went inside, Desert announced he was ordering pizza for dinner and asked Sunset what she wanted on it.

"Anything's fine," she said. "Whatever you guys want." *Since I have no idea what pizza toppings this world has...I've only had pizza once in my entire life, and that was back in Equestria.*

"I'll show you to your room," Satin said. "Get you settled in, then you can rest up while we wait for the pizza."

Sunset's room was decorated in magenta and mahogany, and full of things she didn't recognize. "We brought all your things with you from our old home," Satin said. "I set your room up exactly like it was in Fillydelphia..." She frowned. "Does anything look familiar?"

Sunset shook her head as she took in the large bed, the dresser, the various posters on the walls, a shelf full of knick-knacks, a medium-sized flatscreen TV, and a laptop computer. "I don't recognize any of it," she said. "Sorry."

Satin sighed. "Well, it was worth a shot." She smiled gamely. "Anyway, I had another cable box put in yesterday for you, so you've got cable. Just don't order any movies or events without permission. The laptop...it's a bit out of date since it's your old one from Fillydelphia, but between the tablet and the phone, I think you can make do. If you need a new one for school later, we can see about it, but at least it'll connect to the home wi-fi." She paused. "You might want to look through the files on it. Maybe it'll...help."

Sunset nodded. "I will," she said. She glanced at the TV and the sleek, shiny box with a clock display on the front sitting next to it. "So we've got digital cable?"

"That's right," Satin said brightly. "I know you always wanted us to get digital, but back then..." She suddenly flung herself at Sunset, wrapping her up in a hug that sent pain shooting through her ribs. "Oh god, I can't believe you're home!"

"MOM! MOM! RIBS!" Sunset cried, tears of pain leaking from her eyes.

"SORRY!" Satin backed away abruptly, eyes wide. "Sorry," she said.

Sunset smiled a strained smile. "It's okay," she said hoarsely, grimacing. "It's okay."

"I'll get you an ice pack and one of your pain pills," Satin said. "Just...just sit down and rest. I'm sorry. I...I'm sorry." She backed out of the room quickly.

Sunset rolled her eyes and eased herself down into the padded plastic desk chair, wincing slightly as she settled her weight. She glanced around and found the TV remote. After she turned it on, it only took her a minute to figure out how to work the cable guide. She idly browsed the listings, drumming the fingers of her free hand on the desk.

Satin returned with a glass of ice water, an ice pack, and a pill. Sunset gratefully swallowed the pill and finished off most of the water in one gulp, then let her mother fuss over her as she settled the ice pack into place. "It'll be about thirty minutes until dinner gets here," she said.

Sunset nodded. "I'll just relax here until then," she said.

Satin smiled. "Welcome home, Sunset." She backed out of the room, pulling the door halfway closed behind her.

Sunset listened for her footsteps to retreat. She then smiled wickedly, allowing herself a low chuckle. "Well, that's that," she said. "Sorry, other me. Wherever you are, I'm you now." She leaned back, glancing at the laptop. "Maybe tomorrow, I'll see if I can find out more about you, but in the meantime..."

As she found something to watch—some show about a man with a talking car—she let out a sigh. "I still need to learn more about this world, but for now, I think I can afford to take a few days just to relax and get used to this new life." She frowned. "But as soon as my ribs heal, I need to figure out what happened to Celestia." She grimaced. "I hope the old nag found a way to survive here. I can't humiliate her if she's lying dead in a gutter."

A brief pang of guilt flashed through her heart. She squeezed her eyes shut. "Equestria," she whispered. "I never meant to put Equestria in danger..."

Hot tears stung her eyes. She furiously wiped them free. "No, little miss pretty in pink can figure out how to keep Equestria from..." She swallowed. "She'll figure out how to raise the sun. If she can't, then she's the most useless alicorn ever."

Even so, guilt over the fate of Equestria without Celestia continued to gnaw at her for the rest of the evening, leaving her in a somber and sullen mood. Her parents dismissed it as simply feeling down about her memory loss; they did their best to cheer her up, but she barely even registered the taste of the two slices of pizza she ate before heading to bed for the night.

*You'd damn well better be alive, you old nag...*

* * * * *

Hours had passed since Sunset Shimmer's discharge. It was a half hour until shift change. Dr. Swab was staring at Sunset Shimmer's scan results from three days earlier, face troubled.

"How the hell did we miss that," Dr. Swab said flatly, running his hands through his hair before biting the knuckles on his left hand.

"What's wrong?" Sugar Pill asked. "Looks like she's completely healthy to me, except for the ribs."

Dr. Swab zoomed in on the abdominal scan. Sugar Pill looked it over, then gave him a confused shrug. "What?"

Dr. Swab pointed at one area. "Her appendix."

Sugar Pill tilted her head. "Looks okay to me."

Shaking his head, Dr. Swab handed her his tablet and walked across the room, sitting down and lacing his hands behind his head.

Frowning, Sugar Pill studied the screen. It displayed Sunset Shimmer's medical records from Fillydelphia, which they had only received an hour before her discharge.

It took a minute for her to see the problem. When she did, her eyes widened. "What the hell?" She shook her head, turning to Dr. Swab. "This can't be right!"

Dr. Swab looked up at her. "Can't it?" he asked. "I mean, sure, it could be a mistake. Clerical error." He shook his head.

Sugar Pill's brow furrowed as she read the anomalous entry again. "But if she had...when she was seven, then...what...?" She looked from the tablet, to the MRI results, to Dr. Swab. "Doctor, this has to be a mistake. It has to be."

"I sure as hell hope so," Dr. Swab said, looking up at her with the most haunted eyes she'd ever seen on the man. "Because if it's not, then the girl we just sent home with Sunset Shimmer's parents...is not Sunset Shimmer."

A heavy silence descended.

"So...what do we do?" Sugar Pill asked in a quiet, uncertain voice.

Dr. Swab let out a sharp bark of sardonic laughter. "I don't know," he choked out in a disbelieving chuckle. "I don't know..."

Interlude II (Side Cadance)

Every self-sustaining timepiece in Equestria said it was ten in the morning.

The sky was still frozen at twilight.

Princess Cadance sat upon the throne, facing a large group of tense unicorns, some barely a few years older than her, others so ancient their skin hung in dense, leathery folds. Shining Armor stood at her side, face haggard and eyes bleary.

"Thank you all for coming," Cadance said as two unicorn guards closed the doors. "Everything you are about to be told is in strictest confidence. I apologize for summoning you in the middle of the night and then keeping you waiting, but I had matters to attend to that took longer than expected." Her gaze briefly strayed to the tall, ornate mirror that stood off to the side, a unicorn guard and a pegasus guard standing sentry over it.

"Is it true what they're saying?" a wizened old stallion asked. "Princess Celestia has fallen ill?"

Cadance grimaced. "I have asked the pegasus guard to spread that news in order to stall for time," she said. "The truth is far worse, I'm afraid."

The crowd of unicorns shifted and milled, glancing around with expressions of shock and unease. The same stallion asked, "Surely you don't mean to say she...passed away?"

"No!" Cadance replied frantically, her wings flaring. "No. As far as we know, Princess Celestia is alive, and we have no reason to believe otherwise." She glanced to Shining Armor, then braced herself. "However, she is...missing."

There was a collective gasp.

"Missing?" a middle-aged mare cried. "How...how can she be missing?"

Cadance glanced at the mirror. "I know this will sound strange," she said, "but she vanished through a magic portal contained within that mirror."

One of the oldest unicorns groaned. "Starswirl's besotted portals!" he hissed. "I have read about them. I thought they had all been sealed permanently!"

"Why would the princess pass through one of those old portals?" an ancient mare asked. "What could possibly be worth the danger to Equestria?"

"Can she not simply be retrieved by the guards?"

Cadance blinked. "You all...know about the portal?"

The first unicorn spoke up. "Only those of us who have been around for a very long time," he said. "Starswirl the Bearded's experimentation into space-time magic falls under the category of the most protected magic in Equestria, and only the most learned and trustworthy scholars are allowed to research his most advanced and dangerous spells and secrets." He stood and approached the mirror; the guards tensed, but Cadance waved them down. He studied the mirror, rubbing a hoof along its polished surface. He frowned. "Is it sealed?"

"It appears to be," Cadance said. "According to the guards who were present at the time, it sealed itself behind Celestia and Sunset Shimmer."

A collective hiss rose from the group.

"I should have known," the middle-aged mare growled, pawing the floor and snorting.

"That child!"

"She was such a promising student, but lately..."

"Sunset Shimmer has doomed Equestria!"

"What was she playing at?"

"QUIET!" Cadance called, her voice echoing. The unicorns stilled. Cadance pressed a hoof to her chest, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly, extending her hoof forward. She opened her eyes and regarded the crowd. "We are facing a crisis the likes of which Equestria has not seen in a thousand years. I need all of you right now. You represent the greatest collective of magical knowledge ponykind has to offer." She stepped down from the throne. "Right now, we have two problems. We need to find a way to open that portal and retrieve Princess Celestia..." She took another deep breath. "And until she can be brought home, I need to learn how to move the sun and moon."

The crowd of unicorns shifted uneasily.

The eldest stallion coughed. "Princess, we...we can go through Starswirl's research on the portals and try to get Princess Celestia back, but..." He glanced to the middle-aged mare.

"We have no idea how to move the heavens," the mare said.

Cadance blinked. "What? But...!" She drew back. "No! In ancient times, before the founding of Equestria, unicorns moved the sun and moon! Every schoolfilly knows that!"

"That may be true, Your Highness," the mare said, "but over two thousand years ago, Princess Celestia herself sealed that knowledge. She destroyed all ancient records of the unicorn spells that controlled the sun and the moon."

Shining Armor stepped forward. "But why?" he asked. "Why would she—"

"She did it to protect generations of unicorns," the old stallion said. "She believed as long as she was connected to the sun, there was no need for unicorns to pass down such knowledge, and our ancient unicorn ancestors..." He bowed his head. "What isn't spoken of in school is that the unicorns who moved the sun and moon sacrificed their own magic to do so. It took large teams of unicorns to control the heavens, and no unicorn could endure the strain of moving the sun or moon for more than twenty years before permanently losing their magic. Even Starswirl the Bearded himself burned out his power as part of the sun team."

"It was Celestia's taking over the moving of the sun that restored the unicorns' magic," another stallion said. "After she learned how dangerous it was for any lesser pony to move the heavens, she ordered the knowledge sealed for all time, and personally destroyed all records of the spells that controlled the sun. Princess Luna did likewise with the spells to control the moon."

Cadance and Shining Armor looked at one another. Shining Armor's ears folded back. "Then...we're doomed," he said.

Cadance set her mouth grimly. "Unless we can open the portal and find Princess Celestia—"

"This portal...I don't think it can be forced open," the eldest unicorn said. His horn glowed, tracing the edge of the mirror with his magic. "I'll need access to Starswirl's notes on the portals to be sure, but some of them were designed to open and close on their own at set intervals. Legend has it that one such portal was created specifically to, erm...dispose of three dangerous creatures of dark magic that threatened Equestria long ago." He frowned, tapping his chin with a hoof. "This could well be that very portal."

Cadance gasped. "Then Celestia is in danger from dark magical beings?"

The old unicorn snorted dismissively. "Hardly likely, that was over a thousand years ago," he said. "Besides, it's Princess Celestia. She can certainly look after herself while we work to retrieve her." He frowned. "If we can."

"Portals to other dimensions are not forced open lightly," the middle-aged mare said hesitantly. "Starswirl was centuries ahead of his time, and no unicorn since has had his raw talent and intelligence. It could take months, even years to unravel his research and figure out how to open this portal. And even then, how would we find Princess Celestia in whatever world she's trapped in?"

"She's likely to stay close to the portal if at all possible," another mare said. "She might even be trying to open it from her side."

"We can't assume that," a younger stallion said. "We need to act, and we need to act quickly."

"But we can't act too quickly, or we could destroy the portal instead of opening it, and then she'd be lost forever!"

"If she isn't found quickly, Equestria will be doomed forever!"

"That's why our first priority needs to be—"

"Gentleponies, please cease your nickering," a deep, cultured female voice said. "There is nothing to be gained from this fruitless bickering!"

Every pony in the room fell silent, turning to the great doors of the throne room. The guards by the doors tensed.

A cloaked figure stood at the back of the throne room, halfway between the assembled unicorns and the guarded doors.

She hadn't been there before. The doors had never opened.

Cadance took a step forward as the unicorn scholars parted. "Excuse me," she said gently. "Who are you, and how did you get past the guards?"

"I have my ways and means," the cloaked mare said. "I'm afraid some of your guards are lost in their dreams."

Shining Armor trotted forward, head low and horn glowing. "I'll take care of this," he said. "The last thing we need right now is—"

"Stay your magic, I am not your foe," the mare said, raising a hoof. The folds of her cloak parted slightly, revealing an ash grey coat with dark stripes. The edge of a golden bangle peeked out from beneath the heavy brown fabric. "I have come to assist you in this time of woe."

Cadance waved Shining Armor down, then stepped forward, tilting her head curiously. "What do you mean?" she asked. "Who are you?"

The mare lowered her hood, revealing more stripes, stormy blue-grey eyes, and a stiff mohawk, alternating between white and dark grey. Enormous gold hoop earrings hung from her ears, and gold bands encircled her neck.

"My name is Zecora, and this is no lie: You will need my assistance to unfreeze the sky."

Book One, Chapter 3 (Side Celestia)

On her second morning in the human world, Tia was getting an education.

Across the kitchen table from her, Celestia flinched almost imperceptibly at the sound of a crash elsewhere in the house, followed by a stream of angry shouting laced with words completely unfamiliar to Tia.

Tia raised an eyebrow. "Do I even want to know what she's yelling?"

Celestia peered balefully over the rim of her coffee cup at Tia. "Luna has a bit of a potty mouth this morning," she said apologetically.

"Ah. I had assumed as much," Tia said with a shake of her head. "I suppose I should look up some of those words later."

"You seem largely unaffected by my sister's tantrum," Celestia said.

Tia shrugged. "I'm three thousand years old. I've seen and heard worse. At least, I think I have." She paused, then grimaced at a particularly loud yell. "Then again, my little ponies are rather careful about what words they utter in my presence. I honestly can't remember the last time I was called an old nag to my face."

Celestia tilted her head. "Is that a serious insult where you come from?"

Tia made a 'so-so' gesture with her hand. "It certainly isn't nice," she said. "My seneschal tends to disapprove of nobles who are caught uttering it outside of my presence. They often find it hard to gain audience with me unless they're in..." Tia smiled naughtily. "Deep poo."

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "I fear this world's level of vulgarity may come as a bit of a shock to you."

Tia snorted. "Moreso than having a body I'm unfamiliar with, losing my magic, and being cut off from my home for thirty moons?"

Celestia grimaced and tilted her head. "Well...there are different kinds of shock..."

Luna finally made her appearance. Her eyes were bloodshot, her hair was a mess, and all she had on were panties and a slightly dirty T-shirt. "Make breakfast," she grunted.

Celestia sighed and rolled her eyes. "Hope you don't mind microwave croissant sandwiches," she said. "I don't really want to cook this morning."

"I don't care what you put in front of me so long as it's loaded with fat and tastes good," Luna said, pouring herself a cup of coffee from the rapidly cooling pot on the table.

Celestia chuckled. "Okay. I'll do yours first. Last time I tried to do more than one at a time, they came out all frozen in the middle."

Luna grunted.

Two minutes later, Celestia placed a paper plate with a paper-towel wrapped breakfast sandwich in front of Luna. Tia watched Luna unwrap it; it looked quite interesting...

A few minutes later, Tia had one of her own. "Thanks," she said.

Celestia shrugged, then went back to make her own.

It didn't take long for Tia to puzzle out that bit about 'frozen in the middle'. Whatever method was involved in preparing these—and Celestia certainly wasn't doing any cooking—it was far from perfect; the edges of the croissant sandwich and its egg and sausage filling were quite warm and tasty, but most of the cheese had melted away and stuck to the paper towel, and the thin layer of processed egg was cold and soggy in the middle. Still, she finished it relatively quickly, countering the cold part of the egg with her warm coffee.

Luna seemed somewhat more personable after getting her sandwich down; she went into the kitchen and returned a minute later with another one. Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Luna...you know those have almost five hundred calories each, right?"

"Don't care," Luna grunted.

"And most of that's fat," Celestia added.

"Maybe it'll go to my tits," Luna countered.

Celestia shook her head and turned to Tia with a long-suffering expression. "Is she this insufferable where you come from?"

Tia returned her look with a pained grimace. "She tried to kill me a thousand years ago and I banished her to the moon, so..."

Celestia winced. "Sorry."

"But before that...she had her off days," Tia said with a wistful smile.

After Luna finished her second sandwich and cup of coffee, she ran her fingers through her hair. "Alright, so what is it we're doing today?"

Celestia smiled. "Today, we're spending all day teaching Tia everything she needs to know about being a human teenager. Including all the health, hygiene, and sex-ed stuff."

Luna groaned. "Wonderful," she muttered. Shaking her head, she glanced at her coffee cup. "Fuck this, I need a beer."

Celestia frowned. "Luna, it's not even eight in the morning yet."

Luna glared at her. "And you want me to spend my day teaching an alien horse princess about the birds and the bees and periods and things," she said. "There's no way in hell I'm doing that sober."

Celestia sighed and shrugged. "Alright, fine. I'm not Mother, I can't stop you."

The next twelve hours were one of the most interesting days Tia had had in a very long time. Accompanied by a steady background drone of daytime television, along with occasional breaks for snacking, small meals, and something quite interesting called "video games" that Luna was exceptionally fond of, Tia learned all the messy details of how a human body worked, what general hygiene habits would be expected of her, and the surprises she could expect—one of which sounded spectacularly nasty and embarrassing. She also learned practical skills concerning using her phone and computer, basic "teenage economics", and a whole laundry list of things Tia found herself taking careful notes about lest her head spin right off her uncomfortably short neck. By the time she went to bed, Tia was mentally exhausted.

The rest of the week was spent along a similar vein: between the two of them, Celestia and Luna gave Tia a crash course in human history, politics, and culture. As fascinating as learning new things was, by the time the weekend came, Tia was beyond ready for a break.

* * * * *

On Saturday, Tia woke to a dull grey sky. The rains had long since stopped, but it would still be late into the afternoon before the clouds gave way to clear skies, if the weather forecasts were to be believed.

Just as Tia swung her legs over the side of the bed, cracking a huge yawn, her door burst open and Celestia strode in, wearing possibly the most ridiculous outfit Tia had ever seen.

"Good morning!" Celestia sang brightly, beaming. "Get up, get dressed, we've got a surprise for you!"

Tia rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "What kind of surp—what are you wearing?!"

Celestia blinked and looked down at her tie-dyed T-shirt, bellbottom jeans, and sandals. "What?" she asked. Her hair was tied back with a suede headband, and she had ridiculously huge leather peace signs dangling from her earlobes.

"Is she up yet? She needs to get packed and HOLY HELL, CELESTIA, ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" Luna walked in, and she was dressed just as strangely as her sister, but in a completely different way: she had on ripped black jeans, steel-toed black boots, a dark mesh shirt over a gray sports bra, and a short-sleeved black leather jacket. Her hair was feathered and teased out into a huge, unruly mess, and she had studded wristbands on her arms.

Celestia stared at her, then facepalmed. "Oh, Luna..."

Tia stood up, looking between the two sisters. "Alright, I know I'm new to this world and don't really know much about fashion, but you two look...ridiculous."

Luna and Celestia sized each other up, then sighed. "I guess...maybe we went overboard," Luna groused.

"I just thought it'd be fun to...y'know," Celestia whined.

"What's going on?" Tia demanded.

Celestia smiled. "We're going on a little trip!"

"We decided it should be a surprise," Luna said.

"We so rarely get to leave town these days," Celestia explained. "And there's a music festival in Canterlittle. We thought we'd spend a few days down there."

"Take in the music festival, spend some time relaxing on the beach," Luna added. "We'll come back around Tuesday or Wednesday."

"It'll be fun!" Celestia said. "Get dressed. I'll help you pack. You did get a bathing suit, right?"

Tia blushed. "W-well...yes," she said, "but after everything you two taught me the other day, now I'm not so sure I want to be seen in public in it..."

"Oh, nonsense!" Celestia said. "At the beach, everyone wears swimsuits! Nobody's going to judge you!"

"They might ogle you, though," Luna said. "But that's not necessarily a bad thing."

Tia shook her head. "Well, I always have wanted to go to the beach," she said. "It's not exactly something I've ever made time for."

"Really? Three thousand years and you've never once been to the beach?" Celestia asked.

"Kingdom to rule, sun to control, palace staff constantly in my mane," Tia said, gesturing vaguely. "I'm lucky if I can sneak away to a day spa once in a blue moon."

"Wow, you're overdue," Luna said. "But music festival first. Then beach."

"We've got hotel reservations," Celestia said. "It'll take us a few hours to get to Canterlittle, the traffic might be bad, but we're going to go straight to the music festival so we don't miss anything."

"I haven't been to a music festival in a long time," Tia mused. "Come to think of it, I haven't really listened to much of this world's music yet. Outside of what Luna's played in her car, anyway."

Luna grinned. "Well, this weekend will be a real education for you..."

* * * * *

While Tia showered and dressed, Celestia packed two bags for her and put them in her SUV. By the time Tia was ready to go, Celestia and Luna had both changed clothes; they no longer wore the horrid, nightmarish costumes they'd sported earlier, though Celestia had retained the tie-dyed T-shirt and Luna was still dressed mostly in black. They stopped for breakfast at a drive-thru restaurant; Tia was introduced to the concept of a breakfast wrap, which wasn't too bad, if a bit greasy.

Once she'd eaten, she used her phone to search for information about the music festival they were attending. She quickly found the festival's website, along with a list of performing bands; some of the band names were frankly bewildering.

CANTERLITTLE SUMMER MUSIC FESTIVAL

Featuring

Armadildo

Bifurcated Spork

Chihuahua Fuckblaster

Cloven Wiener

A Crown Made of Babies

Dhumi & the Butt

Eating The Afterbirth

Enemy Diarrhea Biscuit

Fondled Otter

Mall Santa Penis Breath

Oddly Rotting Johnson

Pies for the Retarded

Porpoise Fire

Toilet Horse

Turdgasm

And Many More...

"This is..." Tia shook her head. "I'm sorry, these are actual musical performers?"

Luna glanced back. "Hmm?" Tia passed her phone forward; Luna scrolled the list and snorted. "Indie bands," she said. "Well, most of them. They like to come up with ridiculous names to get attention. If they take off, they usually change their name to something more mainstream." She handed the phone back. "Of course, some of these are already big-time, like Porpoise Fire and Fondled Otter."

Celestia let out a stuck noise. "Oh God, those are real band names?"

"I'm afraid so," Luna said.

"I'm sorry, I just...I'm having difficulty with this," Tia said, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"I'm guessing rock music isn't even a thing in magical horse land," Luna said as she returned Tia's phone.

"No, it exists," Tia said. "I'm only vaguely familiar with it, though. It's relatively new. It's more that...well...the names."

Celestia laughed. "Yes, as music evolves and culture evolves, things happen that our ancestors could never have expected. Such as ridiculous and frankly obscene band names. When Mother was a child, the most unusual band names were along the lines of Raspberry Sundial or Wild Chicken."

"Remember when I came home wearing a Bitch Lips T-shirt and Mother grounded me for a week?" Luna asked. "And now they play them on the oldies station."

"The retro station," Celestia corrected. "We are not that old."

"Anyway, the bands we'll be hearing this weekend are mostly amateurs or lesser-known bands trying to get signed to record labels," Luna said. "There's a few really good bands playing, but, well...it's a free festival. You know what they say, you get what you pay for."

"Luna, be nice," Celestia chided. "You might be surprised."

"Well...yeah," Luna admitted. "But I'm mostly interested in a few bands I already know are good. I'm expecting a lot of these guys to suck."

"I'm not even sure I'd know the difference between good bands and bad bands," Tia said. "I honestly wouldn't know what to compare them by."

Celestia chuckled. "Alright, we've got a while yet before we're anywhere near Canterlittle. Let's start your music education. Raven? Play Nipmuc..."

* * * * *

Tia watched with interest as they drove through Canterlittle. She was aware of the existence of such a place in Equestria, though back home it was a small trade port where merchants spent more time trading goods with seaponies than actually sailing the sea. Here, it was evidently a thriving resort community, with large buildings, palm trees, and many colorful and interesting things to see. Celestia explained the town to her: that the north side of town had a country club as well as some museums and an aquarium, and that the east side of town was the beach resort area and Canterlittle's main tourist draw. "The music festival's happening in a big park that separates the east side from the south side," she further explained.

"Bet the southsiders are gonna love that," Luna muttered.

"Eh, I bet they'll be enjoying it too." Catching Tia's confused glance in the rear view mirror, Celestia explained, "The people who actually live and work in Canterlittle live on the south side. I'm sure you can understand how people who work in a resort town prefer their community to be a little...quiet."

"Yes, I can well imagine."

"Well, with this music festival in town, the south side's gonna be infested with lookie-loos, people parking all over the place illegally, and lord knows what else," Luna said. "So it'll be a bit of a trying weekend for them." She clapped her hands briskly and added in a cheerful tone, "None of which is our problem! Vacation! Woo!"

It took another hour for them to reach the park, as the traffic had grown increasingly congested. Tia understood Luna's comments about the parking situation the closer they got, as SUVs like theirs, larger, boxier vans, pickup trucks, and cars more like Luna's were parked all over the place, along with some vehicles Tia recognized as motorcycles. And there were people.

Lots of people.

Men, women, teenagers. People of all shapes and sizes. Huge, burly men in muscle shirts with heavy beards. Fat, flabby men in open suede vests and no shirts, letting their bulging guts hang out. Women in dresses, women in skirts, women in shorts or jeans. Women wearing bras without shirts—or were they bikini tops? Tia recalled that there seemed to be little practical difference between the two. People dressed the way Celestia and Luna had first dressed earlier in the day. People dressed in even more bizarre attire.

Tia swallowed. "I am an immortal alicorn princess. I have battled dragons, a unicorn king with a crystal slave army, my own sister when she attempted to usurp our kingdom, and the eternal spirit of chaos. I have met with griffons, minotaurs, diamond dogs, Anugyptian basts, and yaks. I have seen manticores, chupacabras, the Ursa Major and her cub, and the chimeras that dwell in the fire swamps. I have a pet phoenix. I have traveled to other dimensions on multiple occasions. And yet this may be the single strangest thing I have ever witnessed."

Luna snickered.

It took twenty minutes for them to find suitable parking. Once they were parked, they made the trek into the heart of the park, which was rife with noise—more crowd noise than band noise until they drew nearer to some of the stages. Tia looked around and saw tables and kiosks selling refreshments and merchandise. A short distance away from one of the larger stages, two men had set up a portable grill and were serving hamburgers. The tantalizing smell of smoked meat reached her and her stomach growled.

Celestia laughed. "I think we should get something to eat," she said.

"Works for me," Luna agreed as she marched over to the grill, the Celestias close behind. In short order, they'd each gotten a hot cheeseburger, a bag of potato chips, and a bottled drink, and had sat down at one of the numerous folding tables set up around the break area.

"This is some crowd," Tia said as she looked around the festival. "Very lively!"

"Ever see anything like this in your magical horse world?" Luna asked as she crunched a potato chip.

Tia rolled her eyes. "Not since the last Equestria Grand Rodeo," she said.

"You have rodeos?" Celestia asked curiously.

"Oh, yes," Tia said.

Luna tilted her head. "I...can't picture that," she said. "Horses riding other horses...?"

Tia laughed. "No, nothing like—no! Rodeos are...well, they're competitions with events like hurdle jumping, roping, and hay bale stacking. My little ponies come from all across Equestria to participate in the Canterlot rodeo, but there are also rodeos across Equestria, from coast to coast. There's good money in it for rodeo champions, but as I understand it, it requires dedication." She lapsed into silence then, choosing to enjoy her food.

Once they had finished eating, they began circling the festival, stopping to listen to each performing band for a bit before moving on to another stage. As they approached one stage, a horrible assault of noise that in no way, shape, or form resembled music exploded from the four people on stage. While the drummer pounded away relentlessly, the bassist had some sort of convulsion, and the guitarist thrashed aimlessly while raking an eggbeater across his strings, the "singer" emitted something that sounded like a half-dead frog stuck in a blender into the microphone. The horrible sound coming out of him went on for about thirty seconds, by Tia's estimate, before he croaked out two words: "DEATH RATTLE!"

And with that, the band just stopped.

The audience applauded. Tia blinked. She turned to Luna. "Was...was that supposed to be music?"

Luna shrugged and made a 'so-so' gesture. "Eh."

Celestia frowned. "Let's move on."

For the next four hours, they mingled with the crowd, listening to well over a dozen bands of varying quality. Most played rock; some played what Luna called "heavy metal", others played a lighter style of music.

The afternoon sun was low in the sky when they returned to their SUV. "That was an...interesting experience," Tia said.

"There's still plenty more to hear and see tomorrow," Celestia said. "We'll go to the hotel for now to rest. Order whatever you want from room service for dinner. We'll get up bright and early tomorrow and come back here."

* * * * *

Saturday night was another interesting experience for Tia, as she learned about human hotels. There was something to be said for sleeping in a bed that wasn't your own—and a bit of a sobering realization that she had come to think of her bed in her counterpart's home as hers. The room service menu was varied; she ordered a selection of dishes that were delicious and intriguing, then went to bed exhausted but happy.

Sunday morning, Tia showered, dressed, and ordered breakfast in. At nine, she joined Celestia and Luna in the hotel lobby. Their hotel was a quarter mile from the beach, facing the ocean; the smell of the salty sea air was invigorating. "I guess tomorrow we'll be going to the beach, right?" Tia asked.

"We will indeed," Celestia said with a smile, stretching her arms over her head. "But for today, we should enjoy the rest of the music festival."

The park wasn't quite as crowded as it had been the previous day, but was still quite lively. Tia bumped into a number of people "her own age" and spent time enjoying the various performances with them. A few, such as the girl she'd bumped into at Blue Box and a peach-skinned boy with spiky blue hair, turned out to be attending Canterlot High School as freshmen in the fall; they exchanged numbers with her. She also sampled quite a bit of interesting, if unhealthy, "festival food" such as corn dogs and nachos—the former had given her pause until she looked them up on the Internet and realized they did not, in fact, contain actual dogs.

Monday dawned bright, sunny, and hot. Celestia stopped by Tia's room to help her get ready for their trip down to the beach. The "older" version of herself wore a modest but revealing golden bikini, a sheer sarong, a festive mauve silk shirt printed with flowers and pineapples which was open down the front and tied just over her navel, and bright yellow flip-flops. "If you're anything like me, you'll need a pretty strong sunscreen when we get to the beach or you'll fry like bacon," Celestia said.

Tia raised an eyebrow. "Somehow, I feel I should be insulted by the insinuation that the sun could harm—"

Celestia raised a hand. "I know, your magical sun in your magical world probably doesn't cause sunburn, but here? You need to be careful."

Tia frowned. "Well...now that you mention it, it's not as though I've not heard of sunburn." She sighed. "I suppose it's simply not something I think about since the rays of the sun can't harm me."

"Well, here they'll give you the mother of all sunburns, so when we get down to the beach, you'll need to put on sunscreen." She rummaged through Tia's bags. "Now, I packed a couple of swimsuits for you and some lighter beach clothes, plus a sun hat..." She blinked, then bit off a curse. "And I forgot my own sun hat."

"I have it right here," Luna said from the door. Both Celestias turned to see her wearing a black one-piece which was cut high at the hips, high-heeled black sandals, and a long dark blue shirt with palm trees printed on it. She tipped down the sunglasses she wore as she tossed a broad straw hat to Celestia, who caught it with a bit of awkward fumbling. "Come on, girls! The beach awaits!"

"Don't be in such a rush, Luna," Celestia said mildly. "We have to finish getting ready first! We need to make sure we have everything we need for a proper day of fun at the beach!"

Luna snorted irritably. "Anything we need that we're not wearing we can buy at the beach. Let's go!"

Celestia rolled her eyes. "You go on ahead then if you're in such a rush," she said. "We'll be along once we're ready."

Luna cheerfully flipped her sister the bird and sauntered out, swaying her hips. Celestia pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head. "That woman..."

Tia giggled. "She is quite trying, isn't she?"

A half hour later, they made their way to the beach. Tia wore a somewhat more modest two-piece than her counterpart, dark magenta in color, and a purple shirt and sarong with matching sandals. Celestia carried a large wicker basket, and Tia carried a heavy cooler full of ice and cold drinks. It took them ten minutes to find Luna; she had horned her way in on a beach volleyball game with a bunch of college kids. Celestia spread out a pair of large blankets on the beach, then sat down and began applying sunscreen. Tia shrugged off her shirt, folded it neatly into the basket, and rubbed herself down with sunscreen, mirroring her counterpart. She looked out at the sea and sighed. "This is nice," she said, tilting her face up to the warm sun.

Celestia smiled. "Would you care to go for a swim later?"

Tia thought about that, then shook her head. "I think perhaps I should adjust to this body more...and actually learn to swim."

"Yes, that would probably be a good idea."

They watched Luna dart away from the volleyball game and dive into the ocean with a tremendous splash and a loud whoop of laughter.

"Hey, ladies! Lookin' good." The Celestias looked up to see two boys who were clearly brothers approaching them. One was older and more muscular with longer hair; the other was shorter and had less well-defined muscles. The older brother flashed them a cheeky grin. "Lookin' for some company?"

"I believe we're good, but thank you," Celestia said.

"Aww, come on! Two hot babes alone on the beach?" The older boy winked. "You know what I see? I see big sis and little sis hanging out by their lonesome, and here we are, me and my little bro, lookin' for a good time..."

Tia frowned and stood up. "I believe we said we're not interested," she said. "If you have any respect for yourself and for the women you seek to make time with, you will walk away."

The older brother leered at her. She stared at him defiantly. He clicked his tongue. "Your loss," he said. "C'mon, bro. We can do better."

As the two left, Tia sat back down and sighed. "Well, that was unpleasant," she said.

"Unfortunately, you run into guys like that on the beach," Celestia said. "Of course, you might also run into a boy you wouldn't mind spending time with."

Tia shook her head. "Not this time," she said. "I'm too new to all of this for...for socialization."

Celestia smiled. "Well, give it time." She picked up her tablet and loaded up a book. Tia watched her for a long moment, then laid back with a sigh, closing her eyes and enjoying the warmth of the sun on her body.

"This is nice," she said.

A half hour later, she sat up, blinking. "Did I doze off?" she wondered.

"For a bit, yes," Celestia said.

Tia yawned and looked around. "Where's Luna?"

Celestia shrugged. "No idea."

They heard boisterous laughter from their right and turned to look. Luna walked past, the two brothers from earlier hanging on either arm. The Celestias' gazes followed them as they walked right up the beach and headed for a row of beach houses overlooking the boardwalk.

"...huh," Tia said.

"Well...good for her, I guess," Celestia said, blinking.

* * * * *

Tuesday evening, dark clouds had gathered over Canterlittle, and the weather had reported a heavy storm system forming off the coast. By the time the trio packed up the SUV for the return trip to Canterlot on Wednesday morning, a steady drizzle fell like a grey curtain. Still, their spirits were high as they got on the road.

"That was the best vacation I've had in years!" Luna declared cheerfully once they got on the main road.

"It was very relaxing," Celestia agreed.

"I enjoyed myself," Tia said. "I actually hope we get a chance to do this again." She tilted her head. "Maybe next time, I'll be relaxed enough to do more than lie on the beach."

Luna chuckled. "Yeah, you kinda missed the point of a trip to the beach," she said. "Then again, so did Celestia, so—"

Celestia coughed. "We all choose to enjoy our leisure time in different ways," she interrupted. "And that's fine, so long as we enjoy ourselves responsibly." She shot Luna a brief, pointed glance, then returned her attention to the wet road.

Luna crossed her arms and pouted. "I'm not some dumb kid," she said petulantly.

"In any event," Celestia said, "I'm certain you'll find ample time for recreation over the rest of the summer, but I'm afraid Luna and I are going to be very busy." She paused, then added, "Actually, so are you. I'm afraid you have quite a bit more learning to do before school starts, and not nearly enough time to do it."

Tia smiled. "I have long experience in studying efficiently and thoroughly," she said. "I am confident I will be more than prepared when school commences."

Luna let out a long, suffering groan. "Eeeeeeeeeegghead," she sing-songed.

Tia raised an eyebrow, fished a piece of ice out of the cooler sitting next to her in the back of the SUV, reached forward, and dropped it down the back of Luna's shirt.

Celestia laughed as Luna's squeals drowned out the rain.

Book One, Chapter 3 (Side Sunset)

Humans, Sunset Shimmer mused as she lay in bed, propped up on thick, fluffy pillows with her phone in one hand, were ridiculous creatures.

Take, for example, the device she currently held in her hand. Anywhere in the world, at any given time, as long as she had enough battery charge and a signal, her smartphone could perform hundreds, if not thousands, of useful functions. It could take pictures, record videos, connect her to thousands of people all across the world on a variety of platforms discussing a broad spectrum of topics, access national and international news, precise weather for her exact location, connect to the vast resources of the worldwide web, provide hundreds of hours of music for her listening enjoyment, and offer a pocket-sized library that put the vast expanses of the Canterlot Archives to shame.

It could even make phone calls.

They say knowledge is power. In Equestria, such a device would make a pony more powerful than Celestia herself.

And yet, Sunset mused as she idly browsed the app store on her phone, humans chose to squander this incredible information technology on hundreds of nearly-identical match-three puzzle games.

There was a soft knock on her door. "Sunset?"

She looked up. "Come in, Mom!"

Sunset Satin opened the door and walked in. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay," Sunset said.

Satin pulled the desk chair over by the bed and sat down. "Whatcha doing?"

"Just browsing the app store," Sunset said. "Looking for something to do when I need a break from studying."

Satin raised an eyebrow. "You mean you actually take breaks from studying?" she said in a teasing tone.

Sunset shrugged. "Gotta let my mind rest sometime," she said. "Kinda got a lot to take in." She looked at Satin and smiled. "I mean, if I'm gonna be ready for high school, I need to be ready for high school, right?"

"Well, true," Satin said. "But a girl your age shouldn't just..." She shook her head. "Nevermind."

"No, go ahead," Sunset said.

"Well, it's just...I know you're still healing and all, but you should be out enjoying life. Getting some fresh air. Making some friends!"

Sunset pressed her lips together in a thin line. "I don't really have time for that," she said.

Satin sighed. "Sweetie, you're fifteen. It's summer. I know things are...strange for you right now, but really, you do need to..." She gesticulated vaguely. "Be a normal kid for a change. It's healthy. It'll...it'll help."

Sunset pursed her lips, her brow furrowing in thought. "I'll think about it," she said. "Really, I promise I will. I just...I don't think I'm ready yet."

Satin sighed and nodded. "Alright, dear. Just promise me you won't burn yourself out, alright? And if...if you need to talk about anything..."

Sunset rolled her eyes and smiled. "I know, Mom. Thanks." She blinked, then rubbed at her eyes. "Actually, you know? I think I do need to get out of this room for a bit. Need any help around the house?"

Satin smiled. "I have a better idea. I'll make some popcorn and we can watch a movie together and play Yahtzee. Just the two of us."

Sunset smiled. "Sounds good."

* * * * *

When Satin went to bed that night, Desert Sunrise was sitting up in bed reading a worn-out old novel. "You two were sure having fun," he commented.

"Oh, sorry dear...did we keep you up?"

Sunrise shook his head. "Nah, I was reading." He chuckled. "How's she doing?"

Satin sighed as she changed into her nightgown. "Well, I got her to at least say she'll think about going out," she said. "You know, it's funny? Back before she ran away, I'd have given anything to see her so obsessed with learning. Now, though? It's almost too much."

Sunrise sighed. "Yeah," he said. "She reads every inch of the newspaper every morning before I even get my hands on it. The old Sunset wouldn't even look at the funny pages."

Satin grimaced as she slid into bed next to her husband. "Maybe...maybe we need to stop doing this," she said. "Maybe we need to let go of the past, forget about...forget about everything from before, and just..."

Sunrise frowned. "I want to," he said. "I want to, but it's just not that simple. There's so many questions we'll never have answers to, and she's...she's just so different from how she used to be." He shook his head. "She really isn't the same girl anymore."

After a quiet moment passed, Satin said in a soft voice, "Is that a bad thing, though? Really?" Sunrise looked at her, and she winced. "I...I feel like a terrible mother for saying this, but..." She looked away. "I feel like I like the daughter we got back, the one who's a complete stranger, a lot more than the one we lost."

Sunrise took off his glasses and exhaled slowly, putting an arm around his wife. "We went through hell with her before," he said. "This past week...it's like we're a whole new family." He rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Hell, in a lot of ways we are a whole new family. I don't think...I don't think anybody would blame us for...for feeling that way."

As he turned off the lamp on the nightstand and settled in for the night, neither of them heard the soft pad of bare feet as Sunset moved away from the door.

Once she was in her own room, with the door quietly closed behind her, Sunset sat down at her desk, staring apprehensively at her doppelganger's old laptop.

She'd only powered it on a few times in the week she'd been home. It frankly wasn't terribly useful to her. Her tablet could provide her with more information more quickly. The only purpose the laptop served was access to the original human Sunset's files...and there wasn't really that much other than a bunch of pictures and old homework assignments, as well as a few illegally downloaded movies. There were some things that were password-locked and looked private, but...

Shaking her head, she turned it on and waited for it to boot up. After what felt like forever, she was on the desktop. She opened the file explorer and went through the "My Pictures" folder.

Very few of the pictures showed Sunset with her parents. Most of them showed her either with two completely unfamiliar girls, or with a boy Sunset disliked on sight. He had steel-blue skin and red, veiny eyes, backswept orange hair that glowed copper in the sunlight, and in most pictures, he wore heavy black boots, ripped black pants, and a black tank top. He wore a pair of dog tags on a silver chain around his neck and had a mess of piercings: three in each ear, two in his left eyebrow, one in his nose.

She opened the web browser to check her counterpart's bookmarks and browsing history. It loaded onto her MyStable page, which boasted an eye-searing design and a number of the same photos she'd just looked through. Only one actual post appeared:

Hey! Sorry, but my page is pretty much all friends-only & private. Wanna keep my parents & teachers off my butt, don't want them knowing stuff they got no business knowing. HOLLA!

In the corner of the screen was a MyStable login prompt. Sunset frowned. "Guess it couldn't be that easy, could it?" Shaking her head, she clicked the login button...

Ten seconds later, Sunset Shimmer's entire MyStable page opened up to her. She blinked rapidly. "She...she couldn't have been that stupid..." Though Sunset had only been in the human world a little over a week, she'd quickly learned about online privacy and, most importantly, about web browser "convenience" features such as saving passwords. Shaking her head, she glanced at the newest post, dated almost two years ago:

OK I'm not saying where I am but just wanted U all 2 know Im OK even tho TC ditched me 3 days ago. Snuck in2 a libary 2 log in. I know 1 of U ratted me out when I was in trotsdale. Not cool. This is last post. Dont wanna be tracked. Goodbye. :(

Sunset frowned. *She was still posting status updates after she ran away? Stupid girl!* Clicking her tongue in disapproval, she read further, backtracking through the last several posts the girl had made.

TC & I are in trotsdale. Hes being an asshole. I dont think he wants 2B here. :( I know some of U R worried. Dont. I'm OK.

TC says I shouldnt post NEmore but I know U all would B freaking if I didnt. Were headed 2 trotsdale in the morning.

Been 2 days. Sorry no post. im OK. OTR so yeah.

It went on and on like that, with the human Sunset leaving a running commentary on her flight from her parents and, in all likelihood, the authorities. Sunset skimmed through the updates until finally she came to posts made before the girl ran away from home. Most of them were bitter, angry ranting from a troubled teen. She frowned as she looked up some of the shorthand and slang the other Sunset had used. The more of it she looked up, the uglier the picture got.

"So that's why she left," Sunset breathed, eyes wide when the final piece of the puzzle fell into place.

Shaking her head, she deleted her counterpart's entire MyStable profile and defriended the scant few friends the girl had. Sitting back in her chair, she tapped her fingers together in her lap, deep in thought.

Before turning in for the night, she created a new e-mail address, MyStable page, and Tweeter account for herself, all with the username "SunnyCameHome".

* * * * *

The next morning, Sunset Satin was busy checking the pantry, cupboards, fridge, and everywhere else for anything they were running out of or low on in preparation for a major grocery shopping trip. While she worked, Sunset Shimmer sat in the living room, engrossed in a book on the history of Cavallonian popular culture on her tablet while a decades-old show about a crotchety old Southern lawyer with a flair for solving murder mysteries played on the living room TV.

Satin adored the show. Sunset barely saw the appeal. The formula got old after a few episodes. Still, lounging in the living room watching TV with her mother while she studied was a good bonding activity, and keeping her ears open gave Sunset information that could prove useful—or at least, context cues to research.

"Hmm," Satin said. "What do you think about chicken fried steak and okra for dinner tomorrow? I haven't made it in a while."

"Sounds great," Sunset said, idly opening her web browser and looking up what her mother had just suggested. Tantalizing images of golden fried steak and breaded okra met her eyes; most of them showed the steak smothered in a creamy white gravy. She licked her lips. *That actually does sound great...*

The doorbell rang. "Huh, wonder who that could be," Satin said. "No, don't get up, I've got it." She bustled out of the kitchen and headed for the door. She let out a surprised gasp. "Cherry! I didn't know you were back!"

"We got back just yesterday," an unfamiliar voice said. "It was late, so I didn't call. Then I went out for a jog this morning and, well..." The woman laughed. "Your house is on my jogging route, so I decided to just stop by!"

"Well come in, come in!" Sunset watched with mild interest as Satin ushered a woman into the foyer. From her vantage point, she could just see her: she had pale yellow skin and hair the color of dusty pink roses, which curled up like rosebuds at the ends. She wore a bright blue jogging outfit.

"I've got so many pictures to show you," the woman said. "I'm sorry I haven't been in touch, but Wisp wanted us all to, y'know, unplug."

Satin laughed. "Sounds about right. And no worries! Family vacations are for family. I completely understand." She paused, then let out a gasp. "Speaking of which, I've got something really big to tell you!"

"Oh?" the woman asked, a smile on her face. "Did you and Sunrise...try again?"

Satin smiled. "It's better than that," she said, leading her friend into the living room. For the first time, the newcomer's eyes landed on Sunset. Her eyes widened, and her face paled as her jaw dropped.

Sunset raised a hand and waved self-consciously. "Hi," she said.

She could've sworn the woman would drop to the ground. Her mouth worked soundlessly. "I, umm...I..." She shook her head, blinking rapidly. "Sa-Satin? What..."

"Cherry Rose," Satin said with a broad, happy smile, "this is my daughter, Sunset Shimmer. She...she came home."

"Oh...my," Cherry said.

Then she fainted.

Both Sunsets stared at her, blinking.

"That went well," Sunset observed.

Satin sighed. "Poor dear. Help me get her onto the sofa..."

While they worked to pick Cherry up and lay her out on the sofa with a plush throw pillow under her head, Sunset asked, "So, this is one of your friends?"

"My best friend," Satin said. "We met not long after your father and I moved to Canterlot. Des and Wisp—that's her husband, Willow Wisp—work together." She went to the kitchen and fetched a bottle of water. "Cherry got me through the worst of it, back...back when we first got here. She helped me let go of...well, of you and really start over."

"Oh," Sunset said softly.

"I-it's okay!" Satin said hastily. "I mean, that's all in the past now, so..." She trailed off. "A-anyway! Cherry has a daughter your age. Maybe you two will hit it off, be friends!"

"Maybe," Sunset said, studying the unconscious woman. "So...if this friend of yours knows all about the old me, she's probably not gonna think much of me, huh?"

Satin grimaced. "We'll explain it to her. Together."

A few minutes later, Cherry Rose woke up. As she came to, Satin spoke gently to her. "Sorry about that, Cherry," she said. "I know it was a shock. Here, drink some water. You overdid it jogging again, didn't you? This should help."

"Mmm...thanks," Cherry groaned, uncapping the water and taking a long, slow gulp. She capped it and wiped her lips, then looked up, frowning. "Satin, I...I'm sorry, but I could've sworn—"

Satin held up a hand. "Don't freak out," she said. "Des and I...have our family back."

Cherry looked past her, at Sunset, who sat there watching the two women calmly. Cherry licked her lips. "You...really did come back," she rasped.

"Yeah," Sunset said. "Umm...hi."

Cherry sat up. "Sorry, I—I'm a little confused..."

"I understand perfectly," Satin said. "It's been a confusing couple of weeks."

For the next twenty minutes, Satin and Sunset explained, in turns, the sequence of events beginning with Desert hitting Sunset with the car, and ending with her coming home. Cherry listened intently, her brow furrowed in thought. When the story was finished, she drank more water, then looked intently at Sunset. "So...you don't remember," she said slowly. "You don't remember anything. The delinquent behavior, the hooligan boyfriend, the running away...you don't remember any of it?"

Sunset shrugged. "My entire life up until two weeks ago is just gone," she said. With a grimace, she added, "I...found my old MyStable page last night. My old laptop was still logged in. I took a look, and..." She averted her gaze. "I don't like the person I saw there. I'm...honestly glad I don't remember being her."

"But you've forgotten everything?" Cherry asked. "Not just what you did to your poor mother, but...everything?"

"Everything except how to read and do math," Sunset said with a shrug. "I've spent nearly every waking hour since I woke up in the hospital learning everything. You wouldn't believe the killer headaches I go to bed with every night."

"Yes, she studies all day every day," Satin said worriedly. "I've been trying to get her to spend some time outside, look around a little, make friends. Up until now she's been able to use her ribs as an excuse to stay indoors, but she's healed enough that she really should be getting out and about. Getting used to her new home." She clapped her hands together briskly. "And that actually brings me to something I was telling Sunset after...after you passed out," Satin said sheepishly, pasting a cringing smile on her face.

One corner of Cherry's mouth pulled into a tight line. "Y-yes, well, I..."

Sunset leaned forward. "You don't want your kid hanging out with a girl who ran away from home, broke her parents' hearts, disappeared for two years, then turns up out of the blue claiming not to remember anything," she said. "I totally get it. I'd be suspicious of me too."

Cherry's eyes widened. "Oh! I-it's not that, dear," she said. "It's just, well..." She fidgeted. "My daughter...has a hard time making friends. She's, well...she's a little shy."

*Uh-huh. Yeah, not buying it.* Sunset smiled. "Well, I—"

The doorbell interrupted her. Satin blinked, then got up to answer it. Sunset remained behind with Cherry, but strained to listen to find out who was at the door.

It wasn't easy. Whoever it was, she was speaking very quietly.

"Umm, sorry to bother you, Mrs. Satin, it's...did my mother stop by here? You see, she was out jogging, but she forgot her phone, and well, I tried to call you, but it kept going to voice mail, so I thought I'd come over and...I mean, just in case, you know..." She trailed off, becoming inaudible.

"Ah, sorry, I put it on vibrate and then left it in the kitchen," Satin said. "Yeah, she's here. Actually, we were just talking about you, why don't you come in?" She walked back into the house, calling loudly, "Sunset! There's somebody here I'd like you to meet."

Sunset and Cherry both watched as a girl with pale buttery yellow skin, blue-green eyes, a soft, round face, and long, elegant cherry blossom pink hair walked into the room. She was wearing blue jeans, white tennis shoes, and a white T-shirt with a trio of pink butterflies printed on the front. Her eyes landed on Sunset and she let out a small, frightened squeak, hiding behind Satin and letting her hair fall over one eye.

Cherry grimaced, but forced a smile onto her face. "Sunset, this is my daughter Fluttershy. Fluttershy? This...this is Sunset Shimmer."

Sunset offered her a hesitant wave and a halfhearted smile of encouragement. "Hi," she said gamely.

"Oh...oh my," Fluttershy whispered, eyes wide and terrified.

Interlude III (Side Cadance)

The collection of unicorns stared at Zecora. Excited whispers filled the hall.

"A zebra!"

"I thought they were only a legend..."

"There hasn't been a zebra in Equestria in...in...I don't know how long!"

Cadance stepped forward, head tilted. "I'm sorry," she said. "I'm just...a bit confused. Who are you exactly, and...and what are you? And what do you mean, we need your help?"

"Your Highness," the eldest unicorn stallion said, "this...this Zecora...she's a zebra."

"We only know rumors about them, mostly," a mare said. "They're...well, alchemists and mystics, or so the legends go."

"Some ponies even call them witch doctors," another stallion said sourly.

Zecora chuckled. "Alchemists, mystics, and witch doctors, too," she said. "As strange as it seems, these things are all true." She smiled at Cadance. "My life's passion is the understanding of all, be it magic that's great, or creatures quite small." She dipped a hoof into a pouch tied to her cloak and withdrew a small amount of green powder, which she blew into the air; it created a twinkling cloud, in which hazy images of a moving sun and moon could be seen. "With simple ingredients, I can brew an elixir of magic which will help you. But know this: even if you take my potion, you must learn inner focus to set the heavens in motion."

"Madame zebra, where did you even come from, if I may ask?" a wizened stallion asked.

Zecora glanced at him. "You may indeed, my good pony. Zecora's home is the Everfree."

A collective gasp rose from everypony.

"You...you live in that...that nightmare?!"

Zecora nodded once.

"By the stars," the wizened stallion breathed. He turned to Cadance, swallowing. "Your Highness...anypony who can live in a place like that...is nopony to be taken lightly."

Cadance gave Zecora a searching, almost pleading look. "You're absolutely sure you can...you can help me learn to move the sun and moon?"

"Indeed I can, if you follow my plan."

"Alright," Cadance said. "What exactly do we need to do?"

"First, I will need ingredients, but alas they are lacking. I fear the animals of the forest used all mine for snacking." Zecora turned to look at the guard ponies. "The herbs and flowers I need can be found in Canterlot's private garden grounds."

The guards looked to Cadance, who nodded. "It's an emergency, so unlock the private gardens."

As the guards rushed off to obey, Cadance turned back to Zecora. "What else?"

"The potion will take two hours to mix and seven to brew. While it simmers, I will meditate with you. I sense you have limited knowledge of magic. We must strengthen your skills, or..." She shook her head. "Well, it would be tragic."

"Nine hours? We're supposed to keep Equestria from descending into madness for that long?" a mare screeched. "When it's already been an entire night and morning with no sun or moon?!"

"Equestria will survive for a time without the sun," Zecora said impatiently. "I suggest you promote it as a holiday, for fun."

The unicorns murmured thoughtfully.

"Now if you will excuse me, I must make haste," Zecora said. "We have precious little time to waste." With that, she trotted off in the direction the guards had gone.

Cadance looked over the gathered unicorns. "Are...are you all certain this is the right thing to do?" she asked.

The unicorns conferred amongst one another; after a long moment, the eldest stallion coughed. "What choice do we really have?"

"Zebras are famed for being wise and learned," another stallion said. "Even Starswirl the Bearded had great respect for the zebras and their mystical ways. It's said that he once studied with a commune of zebras and returned to Equestria with new magic that had never been heard of before."

"Whether or not this zebra can actually help you take over Princess Celestia's job," the eldest mare said, "it can't hurt to try."

Cadance sighed. "Moving the sun and moon...on my own..." She swallowed heavily. "I don't know if I'm ready for this..."

Shining Armor took her hoof and squeezed it. "You have to be, Cadie. You have to be."

* * * * *

As Zecora worked on the potion, Cadance, the royal seneschal Kibitz, and a young noble named Fancy Pants worked on a campaign to mollify the citizens of Equestria. By the time Zecora had finished mixing the potion and left it to brew, guards, heralds, and pages had scattered to the corners of Equestria, promoting the First Annual Twilight Festival. Once the hastily-hatched scheme to convince the good citizens of Equestria that nothing was amiss was set in motion, Cadance sequestered herself in a quiet room with Zecora.

"I take it your plan to address the concerns of Equestria met with success?"

"We can only hope so," Cadance said. "We came up with the idea of a three-day 'Twilight Festival' and spread the word from Manehattan to Las Pegasus." At Zecora's raised eyebrow, Cadance added, "We thought it'd be a good idea to, y'know, give me plenty of time to get this right."

"A wise precaution indeed," Zecora nodded. "It is time you will most certainly need. To move the heavens is no mean feat for one so pretty and petite."

Cadance blinked. "Uhh...thank you?" She shook her head. "Anyway, we also let an 'accidental' rumor leak that this whole 'Twilight Festival' thing is just to cover Princess Celestia having the feather flu and being in no shape to raise the sun. Fancy Pants suggested it, he thinks it'll be easier to sell the whole thing if everypony thinks Her Majesty is bedridden."

Zecora chuckled. "Such a clever stallion."

"If it works, I'll give him a medallion," Cadance said.

Zecora stared at her, lips pressed into a thin line. Cadance smiled and winked.

Zecora snorted and shook her head. "Let us begin, young alicorn," she said. "We have much work to do to hone your horn..."

* * * * *

"My dear auntie is ill?" Blueblood, descendant of the Noble Line of Princess Platinum, pressed a hoof to his forehead as he lay upon a velvet chaise. "Oh, woe! I am not ready to ascend to the Throne! But Equestria must have a ruler, therefore—"

"Pardon me, Master Blueblood," Kibitz said, his moustache twitching in irritation. "In the first place, Her Majesty is not dead and is in no danger of dying. In the second place, even in the unfortunate event that were the case, the Throne would be succeeded by Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. She is an alicorn. You are not."

"She is an adopted pretender," Blueblood sniffed. "I am of pure noble lineage, dating back to the founding of Equestria..."

"You are a minor noble," Kibitz said gruffly. "And lack the most basic understanding of what it means to—" He paused, then shook his head. "Forgive me. It is a moot point, in any event. Her Majesty will return soon enough, the sun and moon will rise and fall, and everything will return to normal, as it has been for thousands of years." He cleared his throat. "In the meantime, Canterlot will be hosting the first ever Twilight Festival, and you will be expected to host a Twilight Ball here at the castle tomorrow night."

Blueblood sighed. "Oh, very well."

* * * * *

Applejack looked up at the sky, frowning. "Dang it all, why ain't th' sun comin' up?"

"Ah don't know, Applejack," Big Macintosh said, chewing on a grass stalk. "If you want mah opinion—"

"Now, y'all don't fret none," their father called as he trotted up to the farm house. "Ah jes' got word from Canterlot. This is some newfangled festival they decided t' have, that's all. They're callin' it a Twilight Festival." He spat off to the side. "Three days, they said. Three days of no sun nor moon. Said ponies should take a break, have some fun, enjoy it."

Applejack and Big Macintosh looked at each other. Applejack scratched her head. "Whut'n th' hay's there t' enjoy 'bout not bein' able t' tell whut time it is?"

"Well now, twilight is a magical time of day," Big Macintosh began. "Some say it's the most romantic hour for ponies to—"

"It's a load o' horseapples," their father grunted. "No sun for three days is gonna mess up our crops somethin' fierce, an' you can bet Ah'll be givin' Princess Celestia a piece o' mah mind. Why, Ah have half a mind t'—"

"Now, hold up there, Bright Mac," an older stallion said as he trotted onto the farm, a dark-maned colt at his side.

"Howdy there, Stinkin'."

Stinkin' Rich grimaced. "Yeah, well. I've got connections, you know, and what I'm hearin' is that this here 'Twilight Festival' is just a cover for Princess Celestia havin' the feather flu."

The Apples gasped. "Th' Princess is sick?" Applejack asked. "Th' Princess can GIT sick?"

"Reckon so," Stinkin' Rich said with a shrug. "Never heard of it before, but she's a pony too, so...anyway. Yeah, so she's down with feather flu, an' you know what that does to pegasi. What I hear is, her magic's up an' wonked out on her, so she can't raise the sun right now." He shook his head. "I'll have to send a proper get well gift to the castle, of course, but anyway."

The Apples looked around at each other. "But...but if Princess Celestia can't raise th' sun, then..."

"Oh, I reckon she'll be fine," Stinkin' Rich said. "Feather flu's pretty rough on a pony, but it ain't fatal. They say she'll be back on her hooves in a few days and everything'll go right back to normal."

"So this whole Twilight Festival thing is a cover for th' Princess bein' sick," Big Macintosh said. "Well now, that makes a ton o' sense. Why, if Ah—"

"Thank you for droppin' by an' tellin' us whut's whut, Stinkin'," Bright Macintosh said, shaking the other stallion's hoof.

"Much obliged. Come along, Filthy. We've got more ponies to visit."

* * * * *

Hours passed. While Cadance remained cloistered with Zecora, Shining Armor, Kibitz, and Fancy Pants managed the information coming in from all over Equestria. To their great surprise, ponies far and wide were buying it. Messages of concern and well-wishes, as well as lavish get-well presents for Celestia, were already pouring in, and Cloudsdale had already scheduled the Wonderbolts to perform a Twilight Festival Air Show. Ponyville had begun setting up a street fair, Manehattan was...not bothering to react to the news at all. Other towns were handling the news in their own way.

Evening arrived, and Cadance, looking thoroughly exhausted, emerged from the room in which she and Zecora had been sealed for the greater part of the day. Shining Armor trotted up to her; he was mildly alarmed when she collapsed against him for support. "Cadance! Are you alright?"

"Just...tired," Cadance said woozily.

"A hot meal and a long rest is what would be best," Zecora said. "I must tend the special brew, then I too must sleep. Good evening to you." With that, she retreated to the castle laboratory.

Shining Armor looked Cadance over. "What happened in there?" he asked quietly.

Cadance's eyes were glassy and dull. "Mareakis...Dune...desert planet," she whispered. "Put your right hoof in the box...what's in the box...pain."

Shining Armor tilted his head, his brow furrowing. "Are...are you alright?"

"Magic...surrounds us...penetrates us...binds us all together..."

Shining Armor frowned. "Uhh...yeah...let's get you something to eat, then get you to bed..."

"The spice must flow..."

"Yeah, we'll get something spicy. Come on now, one hoof, the other hoof, the other other hoof, that's the way..."

"I am Thou...Thou art I..."

* * * * *

Morning dawned...

Well, morning didn't dawn. But after several hours of rest, Cadance awoke refreshed, had a simple, filling breakfast, and joined Zecora on the tower balcony where Princess Celestia traditionally raised the sun and moon.

"So now what?" Cadance asked nervously. "I learned so much yesterday, but I'm still not sure I'm ready."

Zecora held out a flask of purple potion. "This is a brew which will give you second sight. You must first use your magic to change it from purple to white. Once you drink it, you will learn how Celestia forged her connection to the sun, and moon, in turn."

"R-really?" Cadance asked.

"Indeed," Zecora said with an incline of her head.

"O-okay," Cadance said. She took hold of the flask in her magic and directed a pulse through her horn, willing the potion to change. The fizzy, cloudy purple brew lit up and shone a brilliant, milky white. Licking her lips nervously, Cadance unstoppered the flask and tilted it up, gulping down the potion...

light and color and sound and wind and

Dark. The sky above was dark. A crescent moon hung in a cloudy sky with stars sprinkled hither and yon.

A young white alicorn with no Cutie Mark and a pink mane and tail stood on a rock outcropping over a gnarled, twisted forest, staring up at the blank, purple-black sky. Her kind eyes were full of apprehension, worry, and a kernel of determination.

"Can we do this?" she asked softly. "Far wiser and more learned unicorns burned out their magic doing this."

"We are not unicorns, Sister," a gentle voice said. Cadance couldn't see the speaker. "Starswirl said it himself. We were drawn to this place, drawn to the Tree of Harmony, for this very reason. This is our destiny, and we must embrace it."

The white alicorn swallowed. "You're right," she said. "I'm just...nervous. This is..." She trailed off. "You realize the gravity of this moment," she said. "What we're...what we're doing here. If we do this, if we succeed...this is our duty until the end of time."

"I am aware of that, Sister," the other voice said. "After all, you are the one who told me all of this. You are the one who made this decision for both of us. Are you telling me that now, at the moment of truth, you are growing cold hooves?"

"N-no, of course not," the white alicorn said. "It's just..." She sighed. "Alright. Enough stalling. It's...it's time."

A silvery-blue glow drew Cadance's attention. She looked past the white alicorn and saw a dark shape, smaller but decidedly equine, hovering nearby with steady beats of broad, feathery wings. The glow limned a horn which cast sparkly light upon a pair of eyes focused on the sky in concentration.

"Gently," an old, raspy stallion's voice said. Cadance blinked. A third pony had appeared on the outcropping. In the light from the second alicorn's horn, she could make out robes, a hat, and a scrub of beard. "Gently. Feel the warmth it borrows from the sun. Feel the coldness and tranquility. The moon watches over the night, giving ponies peace and security in the dark. You are the moon. The moon is you. You will watch over the ponies, grant them safety from the things that lurk in the dark."

High above, the moon seemed to glow a little brighter.

"Yes...that's it. Now, morning has come. The end of the darkness, the end of the night. It is time to surrender the sky to the sun. You are the warden of the moon. Embrace it. Sing it to sleep with your magic."

The second alicorn's horn flared brightly, and Cadance could see more details: a dark coat, a blue mane.

Slowly, the moon began to dip below the horizon, darkening the sky further as its wan sliver of silver light faded from the heavens.

The alicorn's eyes lit up a brilliant silver, and bands of moonlight swam around her body. Her wings ceased to beat as the magic itself held her aloft. She hung motionless for a long moment, then sank gently to the rocks, dropping to her belly, her barrel heaving. Twinkling points of glittering light winked into existence in her mane, which rippled in the early morning wind.

"Good," the stallion said. "Now...Celestia, if you would, please."

"Of course," the white alicorn said. She rose into the air, spreading her broad, angelic wings wide. Her horn lit up a brilliant gold as she looked off into the horizon.

"Warmth and light," the stallion said. "Search for it, beyond the edge of the sky. Life itself, the promise of joy. Birth and renewal. Laughter and love. Find these things and bring them forth, lift them high into the sky. The night gives way to the day, and the day gives us life, light, warmth, and love. Everything begins with the break of dawn."

And slowly, ever so slowly, the sun began to rise. The sky lit up in hues of pink and purple and orange and all the lovely colors of daybreak as the shimmering red disc of the morning sun crested over the dark, twisted expanse of forest below.

Morning had come to Equestria.

The white alicorn's eyes shone with a blinding golden light as fire and sunlight surrounded her. She slowly landed on her hooves, wings folded at her sides, as her eyes and horn dimmed. Her mane, once pale pink, now shone with pastel hues of the breaking day, billowing behind her and sparkling in the morning light.

And on her flank, a large, blazing sun appeared.

Beyond her, the dark blue alicorn with the rippling, ethereal mane that looked like the night sky took to her hooves. Her flank sported a white crescent moon.

The ancient unicorn standing between them smiled. "Congratulations," he said as motes of magic sparkled and shimmered in the air, streaming into his horn. His voice and posture became stronger, more firm; the bells on his hat jingled. "Princess Celestia, Princess Luna...from this day forward, you alone will be responsible for the motions of the heavens. All of Equestria depends on you to bring forth the day and the night."

"We will not fail, Starswirl," Celestia said in a confident tone, so different from the trepidation she expressed earlier.

"Our subjects may rest assured," Luna said, "that we two sisters will not fail them. Now and forever more, we are the watchful stewards of Equestria."

The scene shifted and blurred...

Celestia stood atop a tall tower. Rubble lay strewn about, and the castle below bore scars from a terrible battle. Cadance hovered above, watching Celestia stare up at the night sky. Tears glimmered in the moonlight, streaming down her face and falling to the cold stone floor below. "Luna," she whispered.

Cadance's gaze turned to the moon, and she gasped. There, across the surface, was the familiar shadow of the Mare in the Moon. It looked raw, angry; it reminded Cadance unsettlingly of a fresh wound that had only just closed.

Below, Celestia dipped her head. "Why, Luna? Why did you...why did you forsake our subjects? Why..."

Cadance flew down to stand beside her. Celestia took no notice of her presence, but she didn't expect her to. This, after all, was a memory of the past, and she was no more than a shadow without substance here.

A familiar, wizened stallion appeared at Celestia's side in a shimmer of magic. "I...am sorry, Celestia," Starswirl the Bearded said roughly.

"You knew," Celestia said.

"I knew," Starswirl agreed remorsefully.

"Why did you say nothing?"

"You know the answer as well as I."

Celestia was silent for a long moment. "What am I to do now?" she asked plaintively.

"What you have done for a thousand years," Starswirl said. "What you have sworn to do until the end of time."

"But...!" Celestia looked up at him. "Without Luna, I—"

"You must take control of the moon," Starswirl said. "It will be difficult. It will not wish to accept you. But you must."

Celestia looked up at the moon. "I must..."

Her horn lit up. She squeezed her eyes shut. "Please," she whispered. "I know I am not your mistress. But you must obey me. You must...you must surrender the sky..."

It took several minutes for the moon to budge. Slowly, ponderously, it descended. Sweat dripped from Celestia's mane as she buckled to her knees. "Just...a little more..."

And with a brilliant white flash and a roar of sound, the past faded into distant memory, and Cadance once again stood upon the tower balcony, the frozen twilight sky above and Zecora at her side. She blinked and shook her head. "That..." She looked at Zecora. "Was that...real?"

Zecora dipped her head. "Visions of the past, of times long ago. I trust that you have seen what you need to know?"

"I...I think so," Cadance said. "I'm not...I'm not sure how it helps me do Celestia's job, but..." She looked up at the sky, then out over Equestria below. "She was scared too, the first time..." She bowed her head. "And...and she had a hard time lowering the moon when she..."

"I have herbs that will calm your nerves, elixirs that will aid your focus," Zecora said. "But the determination to do what must be done...that can only come from inside each of us."

Cadance nodded. "Two days," she said. "I will meditate for two days, and...and study anything in her notes and Starswirl's research that can help me. Then...then I'll try."

"No," Zecora said. "Do. Or do not. There is no try."

Book One, Chapter 4 (Side Celestia)

Tia groaned as she sat back from her computer. "Your world's history is...really complicated," she said with a tired sigh, rubbing the bridge of her nose. She turned a bleary gaze to her human counterpart. "Don't tell me teenagers in this world can really keep all this straight."

Celestia laughed. "Hardly," she said. "History is usually regarded as the most boring subject in school. Only the smartest, brightest, and most invested kids really get involved in it. But it's important, even if they'll forget what little they manage to learn once they graduate."

Tia frowned. "Hmm. I suppose it's not too different from Equestria in that regard." She shook her head. "I guess it just feels overwhelming because I'm trying to learn in a few weeks what kids here have spent years learning."

"Or not learning."

Tia giggled. "Or not learning." She sighed. "Still, all these dates and who went to war with who when..." She shook her head. "It's a lot to process."

"Don't try to memorize it," Celestia advised. "If you can get your head around the broad strokes, you'll be fine." She bit her lip, then added, "Don't waste too much energy studying Great War I, almost no curriculum we've ever used covers more than when it started and when it ended. Great War II is more important, and you'll be covering that for at least three weeks in class. The Independence War is another long unit, and I'm honestly not sure if you'll cover it before or after Great War II. Some teachers prefer to save it for the spring term."

Tia frowned, rolling over dates in her head. "Teaching history backwards?"

Celestia shrugged. "It depends on what the aptitude tests are putting more weight on. Usually Great War II has a bigger section than the Independence War, that's why sometimes teachers cover it first."

"Ah, so it's preparatory."

"Unfortunately," Celestia said with a sigh. "I hate that we have to kiss the exam board's ass so hard these days. The aptitude tests are becoming more important than a comprehensive education. More and more, it's getting to the point where all we're doing is making sure kids pass these stupid, arbitrary tests."

"That seems...counterproductive," Tia said.

"It is." Celestia shook her head. "We do our best to actually teach kids stuff, but honestly? In this day and age, kids who actually want to learn are going to learn way more off the Internet than they'll ever learn in a classroom, and it's all because of these stupid tests some pencil-pushing paper chaser thinks are more important than quality education."

Tia frowned. "I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time processing this. Your world has an education system which far outstrips anything we have in Equestria, even in Canterlot where there's a higher emphasis on structured learning than anywhere else in Equestria. Even so, students in your world are better off left to their own devices if they actually intend to learn anything relevant and useful?"

Celestia let out a long, tired sigh. "Sometimes...it really does feel that way. It wasn't always like this. It's just...the last decade or so, really."

Tia's lips pressed into a thin line. "I've overseen the education of hundreds of foals in my lifetime, and personally taken on a handful of exceptionally talented students. Forgive me, but...as a teacher, I don't understand how this can be allowed."

Celestia snorted a bitter-sounding laugh. "Bureaucracy, that's how."

"Ah," Tia said. She snorted, a most unladylike sound. "I've never had much use for bureaucrats, personally. I humor them so long as they don't hinder the everyday lives of my subjects, but I will never understand how anyone can be so obsessed with trivial, nonsensical paperwork and statistics."

"Amen," Celestia said, squeezing Tia's shoulder. "Hey, here's an idea. Let's both get away from this depressing subject. And the studying. You've been here long enough now that it's time you started meeting some kids your age—" She coughed. "Well, some kids you'll probably be going to school with."

Tia laughed softly. "I think I'd like that," she said. "And you're right. For the length of time I've been in this world, I certainly haven't gotten out and met very many people here in town. I'm usually the one encouraging others to get out and make friends...perhaps it's time I took my own advice to heart."

"Well, if we're going to introduce you to some kids who'll be going to CHS," Celestia said thoughtfully, "the first place we should check out is Sugar Cube Corner. It's one of the more popular hangouts for teenagers near the school." She frowned. "It might not be as busy during the summer, but chances are you'll run into somebody interesting."

"Sounds good," Tia said. She looked herself over. "Let me go change, then we'll go."

* * * * *

Twenty minutes later, Celestia and Tia set out on foot, headed in the direction of the school. Celestia had changed into light tan capris, beige casual loafers, and a gold polo with a sun embroidered on the left breast pocket. Tia wore blue jeans, white tennis shoes, and a powder blue T-shirt. "So we're walking today?" Tia asked.

"The parking situation on the shopping street is...not something I like to deal with, and it's not far enough away to bother driving. Besides, if we do decide to go somewhere farther out, we can take the bus."

After five blocks, the suburban houses gave way to intersections with crosswalks and lots of square buildings. Dozens of people were walking to and fro, many of them engrossed in their phones. The pair crossed four crosswalks and walked two blocks straight before arriving at their destination: a squat white building, situated directly on the corner, with a pink awning all the way around and a few small tables with pink parasols set up along the sidewalk. The day was not unpleasantly hot, but it was warm enough that by the time they walked through the door, Tia had worked up a light sweat and was grateful for the cool air conditioning.

Sugar Cube Corner was not a large shop, but neither was it too small to relax in. There were tables and booths all along the outer walls with a nice, even path for traffic flow in and out of the shop and to the counter, behind which stood a portly middle-aged woman with blue skin and striped pink hair that reminded Tia of cupcake frosting. A display case full of all manner of tantalizing treats stood to one side of the counter, and at least three different drink dispensing machines lined the workspace around the older woman. Tia looked around as they approached the counter; there weren't a terribly large number of people in the shop. A few of them were teenagers, while some looked to be Celestia's age or perhaps slightly younger. Most were busy with their phones and tablets while they ate and drank.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Cake," Celestia said to the woman behind the counter.

"Hello, Celestia dearie!" Mrs. Cake said with a bright smile. "I don't see you in here very much anymore."

"Well, work keeps me busy," Celestia said with a light laugh. "Besides, your shop's a designated hangout for my students. It wouldn't be kind of me to intrude on their haven, as it were."

Mrs. Cake chuckled. "I don't think they'd mind, but do what you think is right. Just don't be such a...stranger..." She trailed off in confusion as she finally registered Tia's presence. Her eyes widened, her brow furrowed, and her mouth worked soundlessly for a moment. "Umm...I...?" She gave Celestia a questioning look.

"This is my cousin Tia," Celestia said. "She'll be staying with us for a while and going to CHS this fall."

"Oh! I see," Mrs. Cake said, nodding and letting out a relieved sigh. "That...that makes sense..." She looked Tia over, her eyes still wide with disbelief. "That's some family resemblance, though."

"Isn't it?" Celestia said lightly.

"So, what can I get you?" Mrs. Cake asked.

"I think I'll have a couple of those carrot cake brownies," Celestia said, pointing at a temptingly-drizzled item in the display case. "And a cherry slush."

"I'll try the carrot cake brownies too," Tia said. "And a red velvet cupcake, and..." She studied the drink menu board above Mrs. Cake's head. "A cola float," she decided.

"Ooh, this one's got a sweet tooth on her, huh?" Mrs. Cake said with a smile as she began removing their choices from the case with a pair of tongs. "For here?" she asked.

"Yes please," Celestia said, folding bills out of her wallet. Once Mrs. Cake put their pastries on small paper plates, she went to work on their drinks. While she filled the drink orders, Celestia looked around the cafe. "Not many faces here I recognize today," she said. "I see a few seniors, but I was hoping you'd find somebody more in the sophomore or the new freshman class to talk to..."

"Oh, those two girls over there in the back booth are going to be freshmen," Mrs. Cake said. "Yeah, they've been coming here for about a year now." She paused, then leaned close and whispered, "They're...special friends, don'tchaknow."

Celestia blinked, looking at the two girls indicated. "Hmm. Perhaps we shouldn't disturb them then, if they're here on a date."

"Oh, I don't think they'd mind," Mrs. Cake said. "They don't exactly come here to be alone together, you know?"

"I suppose not," Celestia said. Mrs. Cake placed two full, frosty cups in front of them, then counted out Celestia's change. Celestia grabbed straws, plastic forks, and napkins from the dispensers by the register, then picked up her drink and her brownies. Tia picked up her own drink and plate and followed her "cousin" across the cafe to a booth where two girls sat. One of them had spearmint-green skin and wild silver and white hair; the other had cream-colored skin and curly two-tone blue and pink hair. As they approached, Celestia called out, "Hello! I'm sorry, but do you mind if we join you?"

The girls blinked at them, looked at each other, and shrugged. "Umm...okay?" the spearmint girl said. "I mean, there's plenty of open tables around, but—"

"Actually, we wanted to join you because Mrs. Cake said you'll be starting CHS this fall," Celestia said. "Is that right?"

"Yes, that's right," the cream-colored girl said.

Celestia smiled. "Allow me to introduce myself," she said. "My name is Celestia, and I'll be your principal starting this fall."

The girls gasped. "Oh!" the spearmint girl said, shooting her friend a bewildered look. "W-well, umm...by all means, Principal Celestia! Join us! I'm Lyra Heartstrings and this is Bon Bon." Bon Bon gave a nervous little wave and sat up straighter.

As Celestia and Tia sat down, Celestia unfolded a napkin and handed another and a straw to Tia. "It's a pleasure to meet you girls," she said. "I'm sorry to intrude on you out of nowhere like this, but I have an...unusual situation of my own this summer." She gestured to Tia. "This is my cousin Tia. She'll be starting at CHS this fall too. She's living with me for a while. She's new in town and hasn't really met anybody her own age yet, so..."

"Oh!" Lyra said, eyes wide in understanding. She smiled brightly. "I get it, you're trying to help her make some friends before school starts!"

"Exactly," Celestia said with a relieved smile.

"That's pretty cool," Lyra said. She nodded to Tia. "Nice to meetcha!"

Tia smiled as she sipped her float. "It's a pleasure to meet you as well. Both of you."

"Wow, you're pretty formal," Bon Bon said in a mildly teasing tone. "Come on, relax! It's summer."

Tia blushed. "Sorry. It's...an old habit."

"That's one heck of a family resemblance though," Lyra said. "If I didn't know better I'd say you were mother and daughter or sisters, not cousins."

Celestia laughed. "So we've heard."

"So where did you go to school before, Tia?" Bon Bon asked.

"Oh, err...it was a private school," Tia hedged. "Overseas."

"That explains a lot," Lyra said jokingly. "No wait, don't tell me. You studied wizardry."

Celestia tensed slightly, but was mildly surprised when Tia let out a mirthful laugh. "Oh, absolutely!" she said. "We all had magical mail owls and fought giant snakes and everything! Remind me to show you my wand sometime." Her eyes twinkled mischievously.

Lyra and Bon Bon giggled. "Don't forget about your flying broom!" Bon Bon said.

"If I can find the silly thing," Tia said. "It flew south for the winter and never came back!" This sent the girls into fresh peals of laughter which even Celestia joined in on; it took almost two full minutes for the little group to settle down again.

"You," Lyra said cheerfully, "are going to be so much fun to have around! Right, Bon Bon?"

"Oh, absolutely!" Bon Bon said. She sighed. "Of course, we'll probably lose her to the cool kids once school starts."

"The cool kids?" Tia asked curiously.

"Maybe it won't be so bad," Lyra said, patting Bon Bon's hand. "I mean, we're all gonna be freshmen now! It's like, resetting the game, you know?"

"Yeah, right," Bon Bon said, rolling her eyes. "I give it three weeks before Rainbow Dash is dominating all the sports teams. Again." She began to tick off points on her fingers. "Rarity's still going to be the most popular girl at school on Hearts and Hands Day, Pinkie Pie is a walking party store, Flash Sentry has his guitar..." She shook her head. "I'm telling you, they'll be on every page of the yearbook like they always are and we'll fade into the background like we always do."

"Yeah, well..." Lyra struggled to find something to say. "Maybe things'll change, you know? Besides, being in the background's not so bad. We still get to have lots of fun, right?"

Bon Bon smiled. "Yeah, I guess." She then remembered they weren't alone at the table and blushed. "Sorry," she said. "Didn't mean to—"

"It's perfectly alright, I assure you," Celestia said, holding up a hand and smiling. "In fact, that entire rant was rather informative. The only name I recognized in there was Rainbow Dash, but then, who doesn't know who Rainbow Dash is..." She laughed. "But it's nice to learn a little something about the new students coming into my school, even if it's second-hand information."

"Oh, I don't know," Bon Bon said suddenly, wincing. "We shouldn't be gossiping about other kids to the principal behind their backs, should we?"

"What gossip?" Lyra said with a grin. "We're not saying anything bad about anybody and everything you said is true, what's the problem?"

"Well, I guess..." Bon Bon paused. "Oh! Speaking of gossip, did you find out anything about that new girl that moved in with Octavia a few weeks ago?"

"Oh yeah, I forgot!" Lyra said, her eyes lighting up. "I never got her name, but apparently she's some kind of amateur DJ. I've seen her around town a few times, she always has on headphones. Oh, and sunglasses. Like, really funky purple sunglasses."

"Purple sunglasses," Tia mused. "That sounds familiar..." Her eyes widened. "Oh, that must be that girl I ran into at Blue Box!"

"Really?" Lyra asked with interest. "Did you find out anything?"

"No, I just literally bumped into her," Tia said. "I remember her because of the very unusual sunglasses and the seafoam green headphones she was wearing. It...sort of sticks in your memory, something like that."

"I know, right?" Lyra said, giggling.

"So, what are you girls most looking forward to about high school?" Celestia asked.

Lyra and Bon Bon looked at each other, their mouths pressed into grim lines. "Getting away from Fluttershy's dipshit brother," they said in unison.

Celestia and Tia both blinked. Given their identical appearances, the sight was rather comical. "I'm...sorry?" Celestia asked.

"Oh, there's this girl in our class, Fluttershy," Bon Bon said. "She's nice, she doesn't really say much or anything, real wallflower. Her brother, though..."

"He's a creep," Lyra said.

"He's a pervert," Bon Bon added.

"He's a creepy pervert," Lyra continued, shuddering. "He makes my skin crawl."

"He will not stop being a creep around every girl at school," Bon Bon said sourly.

"I bet he even pervs on his sister," Lyra said with a frown. "You think he does, Bon Bon?"

Bon Bon snorted. "With her boobs? If I was her I'd have a deadbolt on my bedroom door. And the bathroom door."

"Oh...dear," Celestia said in a disturbed tone. She cleared her throat. "And this...what did you say his name was?"

"Zephyr Breeze," both girls uttered in a tone that reminded Tia of dirty diapers.

"Err...he won't be attending CHS this fall, I take it?" Celestia asked in a hopeful tone.

Lyra shook her head. "He's two grades behind us. I think his parents are getting ready to ship him off to boarding school or something, anyway."

Celestia let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, good," she said. "CHS has been a pervert-free zone for as long as I've been in charge, I'd hate to see that streak broken."

"Oh it has, huh?" Lyra asked with a smirk. "That's not what I heard," she added in a singsong tone.

"Lyra!" Bon Bon hissed, going pale.

Celestia rolled her eyes and groaned. "Ignoring what healthy teenagers normally do that they only think the teachers don't know about," she amended. "I don't count blowjobs under the bleachers in the same category as serial sexual harassment."

Tia choked on her float. "I-I'msorrywhat?!"

Lyra erupted in a fit of snickers. "Looks like miss prep school here is a prude," she said, her eyes twinkling with mirth.

"I am not!" Tia responded hotly, her cheeks burning as she cleared her airways. "I just...wasn't quite expecting what I just heard. Or the source." She shot Celestia a dirty look. "Now if I heard something like that from Luna..."

Celestia held up a hand. "Don't," she said, her tone changing from amused to pained and slightly more professional. "Sorry, but I'd rather our future students not hear about what Vice-Principal Luna is like at home, because she likes to instill fear and dread into the students at CHS, and that kind of information...isn't good for her image. And then she whines about it."

"Ah, of course," Tia said, nodding sagely.

Lyra and Bon Bon blinked, looking at each other. "You...you live with the Vice-Principal?" Bon Bon asked.

"She's my sister," Celestia explained quickly. "Neither of us are married, so we've never seen the point of not sharing a house."

"Ah," Bon Bon said, a somewhat guilty flicker in her eyes.

"So why isn't she with you two today?" Lyra asked. "I mean, since you seem to be out looking to meet new CHS students and all."

A pained expression crossed Celestia's face. "She's...well..." She coughed and ducked her head. "She has a Détaramon tournament today."

Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged a look, then burst out laughing. "Détaramon?!" Lyra demanded. "The Vice Principal of CHS plays Détaramon?!"

"She's the East Coast Champion five years running and took second place at last year's nationals," Celestia said somewhat testily. With a sigh, she busied herself with her napkin. "Of course, since there are kids from CHS who go to these things, she competes under a psuedonym and wears this...really theatrical disguise." She shot an aside glance at Tia, who winced and shuddered at a memory from the day before...

* * * * *

Tia sat on the living room couch, her bare feet propped up on an ottoman. A bag of potato chips sat open on the couch next to her, a bottle of raspberry-flavored sparkling water next to it. She was taking a break from studying to watch a movie about a retiring gangster's household turning itself upside-down on the day he planned to go into legitimate business.

Without warning, a black-shrouded form emerged from the hallway. "The time has come," a sinister voice intoned ominously. "Once again, the time of my reign is nigh. Once again, I will suppress all fools who dare stand before me. My enemies will feel my wrath!"

The black cloak was thrown open wide, revealing Luna, clad in a skintight black body stocking, a dark blue skirt, dark blue high heels, dark blue evening gloves, a loose, translucent dark blue blouse, and a dark blue cowl which completely hid her voluminous blue hair and obscured her face.

"COME TOMORROW, THE EAST COAST SHALL KNOW THE NAME NIGHTMARE MOON AND DESPAIR!"

Tia shot to her feet, her mind racing in panic. "No," she whispered, eyes wide. "No...it isn't possible!" A million questions burned through her mind, followed by a million possible answers. Hope, fear, and dread chased each other around her brain like a dog chasing its tail.

And then Celestia walked in from the kitchen, drying her hands with a dish towel. "Yeah yeah, go play your kiddie card game and have fun," she said dryly. She frowned. "You're seriously going to the train station dressed like that? Luna, the tournament doesn't even start until tomorrow afternoon!"

"There IS NO LUNA!" 'Nightmare Moon' proclaimed. "From this time forth—at least, from this time until I return from the Détaramon tournament—I! AM! NIGHTMARE MOON!"

Celestia groaned. "Fine, whatever. Just...don't get arrested." With that, she wandered back into the kitchen. "Good luck!" she called over her shoulder.

"Nightmare Moon does not need luck, for she has the most powerful deck ever assembled! I shall return with yet another trophy proclaiming my victory!"

Tia slumped back onto the couch in utter shock and confusion. *What...is going on here?*

Ten minutes later, Celestia found her curled up in a shellshocked ball on the couch. She explained the whole thing; after the explanation, Tia felt relieved, embarrassed...and severely annoyed.

* * * * *

"You've gotta be kidding me," Lyra said, eyes wide, as Celestia showed her a photo of 'Nightmare Moon'.

"I wish," Celestia muttered, pocketing her phone. "This is what I have to put up with on top of running the largest high school in Canterlot."

"Ouch," Bon Bon said, wincing. "You know, it never really occurred to me that teachers might have really crazy home lives and stuff." She laughed softly. "I guess kids and teachers aren't so different after all, huh?"

Celestia smiled. "Well, we're all only human," she said. She finished her slush, then stood and stretched with a small sigh. "Unfortunately, I just remembered some things I need to take care of today. Would you girls mind terribly letting Tia hang out with you for a while? If you're not busy doing anything."

"We'd be happy to," Bon Bon said with a smile. "Neither of us really has anything to do today, so we're just killing time. If you'd like to join us, we'll probably run into at least one or two other kids from our class."

"That sounds lovely," Tia said with a pleasant smile.

"I'm glad," Celestia said, counting a few bills out of her wallet and handing them to Tia. "Have a good time, don't be home too late!" With that, she disposed of her garbage and left.

Once the three girls were alone, Tia cleared her throat. "So," she said, "what do you usually do for fun around town? I've only been in town a couple of weeks, and I've spent most of that time cooped up at home studying."

Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged glances, frowning. "Studying? During the summer?"

"Differences in curriculum between where I was before and here," Tia offered with a game smile. "I have to make sure I don't fall behind when I start at CHS, after all!"

"That makes sense I guess," Bon Bon said. "Still, all work and no play, you know?"

"Oh, I've taken breaks," Tia said mildly. "We did go down to Canterlittle the first weekend I was here. We spent some time at the beach."

"Oooh, a beach trip!" Lyra said. "Bon Bon, we so need to do that this summer!"

"Hmm...maybe," Bon Bon said. "I'm not really big on the beach. I'd rather spend the day in the park. It's not as hot, there isn't all that gross sand that gets everywhere..." She shuddered. "Last time I went to the beach, I got sand up my hoo-ha."

Lyra blinked at her. Tia's jaw dropped. "How the hell did you manage that?" Lyra asked.

"I'd...rather not talk about it," Bon Bon said, looking away with red cheeks. "Let's talk about where we'll go today! We need to show Tia the fun places to go in town, right?"

"Hmm," Lyra said thoughtfully, tapping her cheek. "Honestly? Other than the mall or the movies, I'm not sure where there is to go in Canterlot that's just...y'know...fun."

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. "That's probably because we've already done it all, all year long..." She frowned. "We could go to the karaoke box. Or bowling maybe?"

"Bowling, on a day like this?" Lyra asked, shaking her head. "Karaoke sounds...hmm." She leaned back, sipping her drink as she thought. "Hey," she said suddenly, a sly grin crossing her face. "I've got an idea." She cut her eyes sideways to Bon Bon.

Bon Bon frowned. "No," she said.

"I didn't even say what it is yet!"

"I already know what you're thinking, and no."

"Aww, come on!" Lyra whined. "We gotta go at least once!"

Bon Bon groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Lyra, we've been over this. There are like a million reasons to avoid that place. Not the least of which is I'm pretty sure it's for little kids."

"Nuh-uh!" Lyra insisted, pulling out her phone and tapping it several times before thrusting it in Bon Bon's face. "See? It's for everybody!"

"It's weird," Bon Bon pressed. "I don't know as I want to be seen in that kind of place."

Lyra raised an eyebrow. "Bon Bon," she said flatly, "anybody we know who you'd be embarrassed to be seen there by would be in the same boat we'd be in. If we're seen there by somebody we know, they'd be seen there by us."

Bon Bon raised a finger and opened her mouth to object, then blinked. "That's...actually a good argument," she said.

Tia looked back and forth between the two, a puzzled frown on her face. "What...are you two talking about?" she asked.

Lyra grinned. "There's this amusement park that opened up just outside the city last year," she said. "Cheesetopia, the Cheesiest Place on Earth!"

"Talk about your slogans that need work," Bon Bon muttered snidely, propping her cheek on her hand.

Tia blinked. "An amusement park," she said, pursing her lips. "You know, I...I don't believe I've ever actually been to an amusement park."

"Seriously?" Lyra asked. "Not even Flag World?"

Tia shook her head. "Never had the time, I suppose."

"Well that settles it then!" Lyra exclaimed, thrusting a fist in the air. "Girls, we're going to Cheesetopia!"

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. "Yay," she said sarcastically.

Book One, Chapter 5

"Now Lyra, don't do anything to get us kicked out of this place," Bon Bon warned as she, Lyra, and Tia walked down the street toward the bus stop that would take them to Cheesetopia.

"I'm not!" Lyra whined.

"Really? Because we're still banned from Canterlot Gardens," she pointed out.

Lyra let out an exasperated huff. "I'm sure everybody's forgotten all about that by now!"

Bon Bon arched an eyebrow. "I haven't," she said.

Tia blinked. "How did you get banned from Canterlot Gardens?" she asked. She only vaguely knew that Canterlot Gardens was a botannical park in the city, and Celestia had made a vague mention of going there one day before school started.

Lyra cackled. "Oh, it was so cool," she said.

"It really wasn't," Bon Bon interjected sourly.

"Oh come on, it was HILARIOUS! Rainbow Dash sure thought so."

"Yeah, well Rainbow Dash isn't much better than half the boys in our class about crap like that."

"What. Happened?" Tia asked again, putting more emphasis in her question.

Lyra grinned and pulled out her phone, showing Tia a picture. Tia stared, eyes widening and cheeks flushing as she realized what she was staring at. "Is that a—"

It was a giant sculpture of a penis.

"Yep."

"Made of—"

Made entirely of snow.

"Yep."

"And you're—"

Lyra was sitting proudly on the very tip, mugging for the camera.

"Yep!"

"...why?!"

"Because it was funny," Lyra said.

Bon Bon facepalmed. "Your mom didn't think so," she said. "You had to miss our ski trip because of that stunt."

"Eh, I can't ski anyway," Lyra said. "Besides, totally worth it."

Tia shook her head. "I love a good prank, but...that's just obscene," she said. Even so, she couldn't hide the amused quirk of her lips. It actually was somewhat amusing...

Out of the corner of her eye, Tia saw something that made her stop in her tracks. She turned, eyes wide as a familiar mane of copper and gold hair disappeared around a corner. A butter-yellow girl with cherry blossom pink hair glanced in her direction, a thoughtful and concerned look on her face, before she too rounded the corner.

"Tia? You okay?" Lyra asked.

Tia shook herself. "H-huh? Oh...yes," she said. "I...I just...thought I saw somebody I know."

"Who, Fluttershy?" Bon Bon asked. "Yeah, she's in our class. I have no idea who that girl she was with is, though." She frowned. "God, what is it with the big-tits crowd rubbing it in our faces like that?"

Lyra groaned. "Don't tell me there's another braless wonder," she muttered.

"Yeah, and hers were even bigger than Fluttershy's."

"Dammit," Lyra grumbled, shaking her head.

Tia frowned. "This girl, Fluttershy...is she not nice to you or something?"

"Huh? Oh...Fluttershy's nice," Lyra said. "We mentioned her before, right? The girl with the pervy brother?"

"Oh, that's her?" Tia pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Sorry, I'm just a bit confused. You say she isn't mean to you or anything, but you sound like you don't care for her very much."

Lyra and Bon Bon looked at each other contritely and sighed. "We're just...a little jealous," Bon Bon admitted.

"Fluttershy has the biggest tits of any girl in our class," Lyra explained. "Thing is...she also never wears a bra."

"Yeah, and nobody knows what to make of it," Bon Bon said. "I mean, she's a wallflower. She hates attention, she barely speaks up ever, but she goes around with those huge tits and no bra! It just...it doesn't wash."

Tia nodded. "I see," she said. "That...does seem contradictory." It definitely went against everything Celestia and Luna had taught her since she'd arrived. "Perhaps it simply makes her uncomfortable? I know my bra can get...irritating at times."

"Hmm, could be," Lyra said. "Could be she has a skin problem or something maybe?"

"Maybe," Bon Bon said doubtfully. "Doesn't explain the other girl, though. Holy crap she had huge tits. Wonder who she is?"

*I know exactly who she is,* Tia thought resignedly. *At least now I know she's alive and well. She seems to have adapted much as I have...*

"Tia? You okay?"

"Hm? Oh! Yes," Tia said, smiling with practiced ease. "Sorry, I was just thinking. Let's get going, shall we? Amusement waits for no one!"

* * * * *

The bus disgorged the three girls in front of a tall, bright yellow wall pocked with artfully-placed holes. Above a gate through which a modest trickle of people flowed, a sign proudly proclaimed:

WELCOME TO CHEESETOPIA!

An Abondance Of Cheese and Fun!

Bon Bon frowned. "A misspelling on the sign?"

Tia pinched the bridge of her nose. "It's a cheese pun," she said. "And if this is how things are starting off, this is going to be..."

"Gouda?" Lyra offered with a huge grin.

Bon Bon groaned. "I Camembert this," she muttered sourly.

"I agree," Tia said with a mischievous smirk. "I'm not very fondue puns."

"AUGH!"

"We've created a Munster," Lyra quipped.

Tia laughed. "So what do we do first?"

"I'd guess the first thing we do is buy tickets," Bon Bon said. She wrinkled her nose. "I hope it's not going to be too expensive."

"Well that's the one saving grace of this wretched monstrosity of a park, darling," a cultured voice said from behind them. "Given their...unique business model, they do offer very reasonable prices to attract customers."

Tia turned to see a teenage girl roughly the same age as Lyra and Bon Bon standing behind them with a group of three younger girls. The teenage girl had flawless ivory skin, bright sapphire eyes with long, thick eyelashes, and long, lush purple hair that was styled in elegant curls and waves. She wore a loose sky blue blouse and dark purple jeans with matching flats and had a cream-colored handbag slung over one shoulder.

"Hey Rarity," Lyra said with a smile and a wave. "Fancy seeing you here. I didn't picture this being the kind of fondue party you'd be into."

Rarity grimaced. "Well, I'd hardly say this is my scene, but Sweetie Belle and her little friends wanted to come, so..." She noticed Tia and raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And who is this?"

"I'm Tia," Tia said. "I just moved here. I'm Principal Celestia's cousin."

Rarity blinked. "Principal Celestia, the principal of Canterlot High? I see," she said. "I love your hair, darling, it's rather striking."

"Thank you," Tia said. *You should see it back in Equestria...* "So will you be going to CHS this fall?"

"Yes," Rarity said. She pressed her lips thin. "Do you mind if we accompany you in the park? I'll be honest, I'm a bit self-conscious about—"

"Being the only high-schooler in your group?" Bon Bon asked with a smirk. "Yeah, totally get it. Sure, the more the merrier!" As they moved to the line queueing up to buy tickets, she asked, "So, your little entourage, I don't believe we've been introduced?"

"Oh, of course! Where are my manners." Rarity gestured to each girl in turn. "This is my dear sister Sweetie Belle," she said, indicating a white-skinned girl with curly pink-and-lavender hair and bright green eyes, "and her friends Apple Bloom—" A girl with light yellow skin and long bright red hair tied up with a big pink ribbon, "—and Scootaloo." A girl (or at least, Tia assumed so; it was honestly hard to be sure) with dark orange skin and short, unruly bright fuschia hair. While Sweetie Belle was dressed rather nicely (a bit overdressed for summer, in Tia's estimation), Apple Bloom wore jeans, boots, and a T-shirt, while Scootaloo wore knee-length cargo shorts, a T-shirt, and sneakers.

As they approached the ticket gate, Bon Bon pulled out her phone and browsed to the park's website. "Ouch," she said with a wince.

"What's wrong?" Tia asked.

Bon Bon grimaced and let out a sigh. "Bye-bye allowance and bye-bye new phone."

"How bad is it?" Lyra asked. Bon Bon showed her, and she winced. "Oh." She glanced at Tia and bit her lip. "I didn't think about...hmm. Maybe this wasn't a good idea after all."

Tia winced. "Is it that expensive to get in?"

"It isn't cheap," Lyra said.

Rarity scoffed. "Oh, if that's all you're worried about..." She dug through her purse and came out with a thick pad of coupons secured with glue. She tore three off and handed one each to the three teens. "I have more than enough coupons for this place," she said. "They handed them out to all the shops in town. I can't give them away."

Lyra let out a relieved sigh. "Thanks, Rarity, you're a lifesaver," she said. She looked at the coupon and beamed happily. "Oh look! With this I can afford the Viking Pass!"

"Yeah, same here," Bon Bon said. She looked at her phone. "Seems to be the best value, too," she added.

"Viking Pass?" Tia asked as she studied her coupon, noting that she had just enough money on hand to afford the 'Viking Pass' with enough left over for bus fare home.

"Gives you unlimited access to all the food vendors in the park," Lyra said. "Won't cover the souvenir stands or the carney traps, those you still have to pay for, but who really wants souvenirs from a cheese park?"

"Yeah, their T-shirts probably stink," Bon Bon agreed.

"Hmm," Tia mused. "Well, it would seem that our encountering Rarity here was a stroke of providence." She smiled at Rarity. "Thank you."

Rarity waved her off. "It's nothing, darling, really." She smiled brightly. "Well, girls...Cheesetopia awaits!"

As soon as the group paid for their tickets and passed through the turnstiles, the three younger girls tore off into the park, giggling. "Girls, wait!" Rarity called plaintively. "We agreed to stick...together...oh dear..."

"Eh, let 'em have their fun," Lyra said. "They've got their phones, right?"

"Well...yes," Rarity said reluctantly. "I suppose there's no harm in letting them explore on their own. Just because the venue is cheesy doesn't necessarily mean the patrons are cheesy."

"That's the spirit!" Lyra said.

"Though it does smell pretty ripe around here," Bon Bon said with a grimace, her nose wrinkling in distaste.

Tia looked around, seeing a row of stalls offering fried mozzarella sticks, nachos, cheese-covered soft pretzels, and sample platters of more exotic cheeses. "Well, with so many cheese-based foods around, I'm not surprised this place is full of Gruyère," she said lightly.

The other girls stared at her.

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "Bad, darling. Just...terribly bad."

"You're right," Tia said. "That was awful. I could do cheddar."

All the girls groaned. "Please, cut the cheese puns," Bon Bon implored.

Lyra snickered. "Hehehe, cut the cheese..."

Rarity pinched the bridge of her nose. "This is going to be one of those days, isn't it," she said flatly.

Tia giggled. "Come on, let's see what sort of fun we can Havarti."

"GAAAAH!"

"Ricotta admit, this is pretty fun," Lyra joked.

"Don't make me dekopin you," Bon Bon threatened, glowering at Lyra, who stuck her tongue out and skipped off into the park, laughing.

Rarity shook her head. "What have I gotten myself into," she moaned.

Tia laughed. "Come on. We're at a cheese-themed amusement park, it's the middle of summer, I think a little ridiculous frivolity is the order of the day."

Rarity sighed theatrically and rolled her eyes. "I suppose," she said in a mock-resigned tone. "So, where to first?"

Tia glanced around, taking in the various attractions. Her gaze landed upon the entrance to the park's centermost structure. Her eyes lit up. "That," she decided.

Rarity followed her gaze. Atop a tall, white, faintly slimy-looking wall, a sign declared:

This way to the Haunted Cheese Maze

Provolone in the Dark

Rarity pursed her lips. "Isn't that more of an autumn thing, darling?"

"I never get to visit the haunted corn maze back home," Tia said, fierce determination in her eyes. "I must go in."

Rarity blinked. "Haunted...corn maze?"

"Ah, it's...a thing one of the nearby farming villages does," Tia said. "Back home, I mean."

"I see," Rarity said. "Well then, I suppose I'll accompany you."

Lyra and Bon Bon rematerialized out of nowhere. "So, what're we doing first?" Lyra asked.

Tia pointed at the cheese maze. "That."

"Ooh, looks like fun!" Lyra said, taking hold of Bon Bon's hand. "Let's go!"

And so, the four girls ventured into the haunted cheese maze...

* * * * *

The haunted cheese maze wound up being a nonstop sensory assault. In the cloying darkness, lit by patches of glowing bioluminescent mold and the occasional well-placed bank of LED lights, the girls' eyes, ears, and noses were accosted by pungent cheese odors, clouds of colorful smoke, ghastly giggling, bone-rattling lowing of ghost cattle, and holographic jumpscare after holographic jumpscare: mutilated zombie cows, giant cheese monsters, and a minotaur whose appearance was always accompanied by a ground-pounding, rhythmic bass thump. Tia found the experience delightful; Rarity had to be taken aside and given room to breathe once they found the exit. Bon Bon seemed completely unimpressed, while Lyra couldn't stop laughing.

Once Rarity recovered, they took a leisurely ride on the Wheel-O-Cheese, which afforded a breathtaking view of the area outside the city, with its farms and undeveloped outlying lands and the Canterlot Country Club. "Father has a membership there," Rarity said. "He only plays golf once a month, of course, but mother and I go out every Sunday to play tennis and avail ourselves of the day spa."

Tia got the sense, from the things she said, her general demeanor, and her affected posh accent that Rarity fancied herself an important person, longing to be part of high society. She knew the type—had dealt with them for hundreds of years—but while most pretenders to high class were shameless sycophants puffing themselves up to raise their stake in the world, there were those, like Rarity, who were as much substance as they were style. Her read on Rarity was that she was a drama queen and longed for the refined life of high society, wealth, and fame, but underneath it all was a nice, kind girl who enjoyed having fun with friends—there was, after all, no societal advantage to going through a haunted cheese maze with a group of girls she barely knew, even if one was the "cousin" of the school principal.

After the Wheel-O-Cheese ride, the girls spent some time wandering around the park, sampling a few cheesy treats from the vendors. The soft pretzels came with a cheese sauce that was delightful—sharp and salty, with a tang that spoke of sublime aged cheeses. There was an exhibition of what Lyra called "the fancy cheeses", which elicited a scoff from Rarity and a roll of the eyes from Bon Bon. All four girls agreed that both the aroma and the flavor of Camembert was nauseating, but the other girls found that a few cheeses with an absolutely hideous stench turned out to be quite flavorful.

None of this, alas, was anything new to Tia, as a cheese had not been invented that she hadn't tasted—whether she wanted to or not. Still, there were certain cheeses she had not had in a very long time, so she enjoyed the refresher.

After that, they'd regrouped with the three younger girls and gone on the park's signature attraction, a curiously moon-and-cheese themed roller coaster called "Fromage Here To Eternity" which zipped in and out of a giant "moon" made of "green cheese". After the roller coaster, Rarity and Sweetie Belle both excused themselves to the restroom; Tia felt sympathy for them, as her own stomach was flipping quite queasily from the experience. *Knowing I can't fly or teleport right now makes things such as that rather more terrifying...*

Once Rarity and Sweetie Belle rejoined the group, they mutually agreed to go on a slower, more relaxed ride next, and though Scootaloo protested, they piled into "Camemboats" that floated leisurely along a river of "milk" which "curdled" as a speaker on the boat droned on about the cheesemaking process.

"Talk about some wasteful engineering," Bon Bon muttered as she watched large, slimy "curds" float past in the river.

"Pretty impressive, though," Lyra said.

"Pretty boring if you ask me," Scootaloo complained.

"Yeah, this is too much like when mah big sis wanted t' help me with th' Applewood Derby," Apple Bloom said with a sigh.

"Now, girls," Rarity said patiently. "There is still plenty of time for you to go on one or two of the more exciting rides before we have to head back."

"I wanna go on the Bumper Cows!" Scootaloo said excitedly.

"Bumper...Cows?" Bon Bon asked, tilting her head.

Lyra giggled. "You know, they're bumper cars, except they're tricked out to look like cows."

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. "Of course," she said.

"Could be worse," Tia said lightly. "It could be bumper cheese."

Thirty minutes later, Tia found herself staring in flat disbelief, with Lyra snickering at her and Rarity patting her sympathetically on the shoulder.

The "Bumper Cows" turned out to be "Cows Vs. Cheese: Bumper Rally", with half the bumper cars tricked out to look like cows and the other half...

Well, they were saucer-shaped cheese wheels.

When their turn came up, Tia, Lyra, Rarity, and Scootaloo took cows while Bon Bon, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle took cheese. Tia had a delightful time careening her little cow car all over the asphalt, bumping into the guardrails and the other cars, occasionally getting enough control of her craft to go on an attack run. Rarity and Sweetie Belle, meanwhile, had some sort of sibling rivalry going on, as they kept going after each other. Lyra and Bon Bon alternated between going at each other and teaming up against somebody else—usually Tia, to her consternation.

Once their time was up, seven severely jostled, thoroughly amused, laughing girls staggered out onto the park's paved paths. "That was fun!" Tia exclaimed.

"Yes, it was rather enjoyable," Rarity said.

"What do we do next?" Sweetie Belle wondered.

Rarity glanced at her phone and grimaced. "I'm afraid we take our leave now," she said.

"Awww," the younger girls chorused.

"I'm sorry, but we've simply used up all our time for this excursion," she said. With a gentle smile, she added, "Perhaps you'll be able to return later in the summer? Maybe with Applejack next time?"

"Can we at least make one last round of the food stands?" Scootaloo asked.

Rarity bit the inside of her cheek. "Fifteen minutes," she said.

"YAY!" The girls raced off to stuff their faces. Rarity tutted, folding her arms and smiling as she watched them.

"Well, it was fun while it lasted, huh?" Lyra said with a grin.

"I suppose it was," Rarity said with a theatrical resigned sigh. She glanced at Tia. "Oh, but before I take my leave, we simply must stay in touch, darling! I rather enjoyed meeting you. Perhaps we can spend time together again? Someplace a bit more...dignified?"

Tia laughed softly. "I'd like that," she said. She exchanged numbers with Rarity. Rarity also gave her her social media information; Tia mused that she would probably need to set up some social media presence for herself now that she had friends.

That thought brought a warm smile to her face. *It's so rare that I have the pleasure of forging new friendships of my own these days. I believe I'm going to enjoy this experience.*

* * * * *

Once Rarity and her group left, Tia and her new friends spent another hour wandering around the park, but none of the remaining rides really appealed to them, and they all felt as though they'd eaten enough cheese to last the rest of the year. The sun was low in the sky when they bid a fondue farewell to Cheesetopia.

Tia returned home to find Celestia relaxing on the living room sofa watching the evening news and working diligently on her tablet, a cup of tea and a plate of cookies in front of her. "I'm back," she said.

Celestia looked up and smiled. "Did you have a good time?"

"We certainly did," Tia said. "I never knew amusement parks could be so...amusing!"

"Oh?" Celestia asked. "And which amusement park did you three go to?"

"Cheesetopia," Tia said. "It was..." She tilted her head, pursing her lips. "A unique experience."

Celestia snorted. "So I've heard," she said. "I don't think I could handle that many cheese puns."

"Well, it's certainly been a long time since I've eaten that much cheese in a single day," Tia said. She let out a whining, raspy fart; her eyes widened and her cheeks burned crimson. "Oh dear."

A stench filled the air that made Celestia gag. She raised an eyebrow. "Thanks for sharing," she said dryly.

Tia groaned. "I think my cheese farts and I will retire for the evening," she said. As she headed for her bedroom, she paused. "Oh," she said, "I almost forgot." She turned back to Celestia, a worried look on her face. "While I was with my new friends, I...believe I saw Sunset Shimmer."

Celestia blinked. "That student of yours you chased through the portal?"

"Yes," Tia said, worrying at her lip. "Of course, it...it could have been her counterpart here, but..." She frowned. "In any case, she appeared to be with a girl Lyra and Bon Bon know. Fluttershy, I think it was."

"Hmm," Celestia said. "Well...what will you do about it?"

Tia was silent for a moment. "I don't know," she said. "If...if it was her, it's not as though I'm in any position to really do anything. Except maybe keep an eye on her." She frowned. "I...I could try to talk to her, work out the differences that drove her away, but..."

"But even if that works, the two of you are still stuck in a world that isn't yours," Celestia pointed out. "Something tells me that's going to make it hard for the two of you to reconcile."

Tia grimaced. "You could be right," she said. She sighed heavily. "I'll worry about Sunset Shimmer in the morning. Right now, I need sleep." As though signalling her body's agreement, she yawned and farted at the same time.

Celestia waved a hand in front of her nose. "Yes. Please turn in for the evening. I've had my fill of cheesy horse farts."

Tia stuck her tongue out at Celestia, then shambled off to her bedroom.

Book One, Epilogue

Days passed.

As Sunset's ribs and bruises slowly healed, she spent more time hanging out with Fluttershy and, on occasion, Rarity. Even on days when she didn't hang out with the two girls, they would text and send each other pictures and silly memes. With their help and her continued studies, Sunset gradually bridged the gap between "unicorn pretending to be teenage girl with amnesia" to "regular teenage girl".

One thing that kept cropping up, whenever she chatted with Rarity, was a new friend Rarity had made: a girl named Tia. She'd apparently met her later the same day Sunset had first met Rarity, at an amusement park just outside the city. It didn't take long for Sunset's worst fears to be confirmed.

Rarity's new friend Tia was Princess Celestia.

As July drew to a close, Sunset's parents took her to Canterlot High School to register for the fall. They explained that due to her unique circumstances and lack of school records for the last couple of years, she might have to take a few placement tests and endure some uncomfortable scrutiny. She assured them she could handle it.

All of that went completely out the window when she found herself seated across the desk from the principal of Canterlot High School.

Who was, in a cruel twist of fate, also Celestia.

Principal Celestia studied them with a mild expression as she shuffled papers on her desk. Sunset's parents had introduced her and explained her situation in detail. Once they fell silent, a lull settled over the room, broken only by the sounds of papers and Celestia's pen as she processed hard copies of enrollment paperwork. "Well, it certainly sounds as though your family has encountered some difficulty," she said. She picked up her phone for a moment, either sending a text or checking something, then set it back down and turned her gaze to Sunset. "And you'll commit yourself to your studies and behave yourself in a manner befitting a student at this school?"

"Of course," Sunset said. "My past is...whatever it is. It's not who I am now. I just want to go to school, have normal friends, have a normal life..." She smiled winningly. "All that good stuff."

"I see," Celestia said. She glanced to either side of Sunset, to her parents. "Would the two of you mind if I speak to your daughter privately for a few minutes? Given her unusual situation, I'd just like to take a moment to get to know her, address any concerns she has, settle a few of my own concerns. I find it easier to have these conversations without a student's parents in the room." Celestia smiled. "You might want to have a look around the campus while we talk. After all, you've never been here before, right? We're very proud of our little school."

"Of course," Desert Sunrise said. He stood, touching his daughter's shoulder briefly in a show of support as he and a nervous-looking Sunset Satin left the room.

Once their silhouettes had moved away from the door, Celestia's smile dropped, and she fixed Sunset with an all-too-familiar probing stare as she folded her hands on her desk. "So, total amnesia...so total you've had to relearn how to function in society. That's quite extraordinary."

"It hasn't been easy," Sunset said.

"No, I suppose not."

The door opened. Soft footsteps approached Sunset from behind. A hand landed on her shoulder.

"It has been a while, my foolish, misguided student. It pleases me to see you are doing well in this world."

Sunset stiffened. She craned her neck to look up into the eyes of a much younger, and yet much older, Celestia. "Seems you're managing alright," she said. She looked between the two Celestias. "So, how'd you manage to settle in here?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. "It must be one heck of a story."

"I met my counterpart and told her the truth," Tia said simply. "Until a way can be found to return to Equestria, I will be living under the guise of her cousin Tia and attending this school."

"I see," Sunset said. "So we both have our little secrets and lies."

Tia looked away, shamefaced. "You and I both know it's necessary," she said. "But at least my cover story is honest. Yours is cruel and sadistic."

"Is it?" Sunset asked, standing up. She found, to her delight, that she was taller than the princess now; she took advantage of that height to loom over Tia, looking down her nose at her. "Those two had their hearts ripped apart by a wicked little bitch who took all their love and all their frustration and everything they gave her and crapped all over it." She stepped back, adjusting her shirt. "Now, they have me, a perfect, intelligent, loving daughter with a blank slate. We've started over as a family, and they're happy." She smirked. "By all means, go tell them their real daughter is probably long dead or strung out on drugs somewhere. Tell them I'm an alien who has perfectly replaced the Sunset Shimmer that ran away two years ago. Crush them with the truth, leave them broken shells of good, decent human beings."

Tia took a step back, frowning. "I'd never do something so cruel," she said.

"Wouldn't you?" Sunset challenged. "Does Principal Celestia here know what became of your sister, Princess Luna?" She narrowed her eyes. "Did you tell her about how you groomed me to be a princess and rule by your side, then when I tried to take what was rightfully mine, cast me out?" She crossed her arms. "You are the very definition of cruel, you miserable old nag."

"I think that's enough," Principal Celestia said sternly.

Tia fought to keep her composure. "I...I was wrong," she whispered. "I'll admit that. I didn't...I wanted you to be...what you were clearly never meant to be..."

"Oh, wasn't I?" Sunset asked. She smirked. "Well, let me tell you something, Princess. Here, in this world? We're on equal footing. You don't rule here. Your thousands of years of wisdom and magic and high moral standing don't mean anything now. You and me? We're aliens, living under false pretenses in a world we don't belong in. I wonder...which one of us will make the better human, in the end?" She cast her eyes over to Principal Celestia. "I believe I have a placement test to take, don't I?"

Principal Celestia scowled darkly at her. "I'll inform Vice-Principal Luna to administer it directly," she said. "I'm sure you'll have no difficulty passing."

Sunset tossed her hair and turned to leave. "Let the games begin," she said. She paused as she passed Tia. "Oh, by the way, I'm sure you know by now, but I'm friends with Rarity too. I'd be careful about what you tell her about me." With that, she stalked out of Principal Celestia's office, head held high, a confident, arrogant smirk on her face.

As soon as she was gone, Tia sank into her vacated chair and deflated. Tears pricked at her eyes.

Celestia shifted in her desk, a deep scowl marring her face. "Good grief, what a rude little cunt," she said sourly.

Tia sighed. "It's...it's my fault she's like that," she said. "I made mistakes with her I never should've made. She expected things to be handed to her just because...just because I told her..."

"Don't blame yourself," Celestia said, shaking her head. "You're not responsible for somebody else's nasty attitude."

Tia grimaced. "I could've tried harder," she said. "Could've made more of an effort to stress how important friendship is. If I'd been more insistent, seen to it she made friends..."

"Well, from the sound of it, she's making friends now," Celestia said.

Tia sniffled. "Y-yes," she said. "And...she's right. We have a mutual friend in Rarity. That's...that's going to be awkward."

Celestia sighed. "I hope your ridiculously long life of royal politics and ruling a kingdom has prepared you for the hell that is high school drama."

"You and me both," Tia muttered. "Because it sounds to me like Sunset Shimmer is determined to make CHS a battlefield..."

* * * * *

Sunset's self-congratulatory smirk had smoothed out into a mild, impassive smile by the time she met Vice-Principal Luna, who studied her with a dark, intimidating expression. "So, you're Sunset Shimmer," she said coldly. "I've heard a great deal about you."

"I'm sure you have," Sunset said.

Luna frowned as she laid a series of exam booklets out on a table. "You have two hours," she said, "to complete as much of this test as you can. This will determine your eligibility to enroll as a freshman here." She sat down behind her desk and started a digital timer. As Sunset picked up a pencil and began working, Luna said, "Assuming you make the grade, let me give you a piece of advice: I'll be watching you. Give me one excuse to expel you from school, and you'll be out of here before you can say homeroom."

"Why, Vice-Principal Luna!" Sunset said in an affected tone of surprised hurt. "I don't know what you could possibly mean! I'll be on my best behavior, all the time!"

"Uh-huh," Luna muttered.

* * * * *

When Sunset met up with her parents again, she was all smiles. "I passed," she said. "I'm officially a student here now."

"That's great, hon!" Desert Sunrise said.

"You know something funny?" Sunrise Satin said. "We saw a girl wandering around who looked exactly like the principal!"

"Yeah, she even had that same crazy hair, can you believe it?"

Sunset laughed. "Yeah, the principal's cousin Tia," she said. "I ran into her while I was talking with Principal Celestia."

"Those are some strong genes," Sunrise said. "Cousin, huh? Well, let's get going. I'm sure you're starving. How's Los Tacos Hermanos sound?"

"Sounds great," Sunset said cheerfully. She cast a glance back at the school as they headed for the car. Her eyes landed on the horse statue. She bit her lip.

*Maybe...I shouldn't have walked all over Celestia like that,* she mused. *I mean, who knows what kind of shape Equestria's in without her...*

A text from Fluttershy distracted her, and a few minutes later, she was mostly back in good spirits again.

* * * * *

As the sun began to set, Celestia, Tia, and Luna made their way to the school parking lot. As they headed out, Tia stopped in her tracks and walked over to the horse statue, placing a hand against the marble plinth, warm from the afternoon heat. She sighed heavily.

"Are you okay, Tia?" Celestia asked.

Tia shook her head and wiped her eyes. "Just...just worried about Equestria," she said. "I hope...I hope everypony's okay..."

Book Two, Prologue: First Part of the Journey

The final weeks of summer dragged on in a hot, miserable slog.

A heat wave settled in, exacerbated by stinking, sticking humidity that meandered in from the southeast and stayed through August. All of Canterlot was feeling it; fewer people were out and about during the day, choosing to either stay at home or find some refuge from the heat and stay there until late evening.

"Why couldn't this be a dry heat?" Fluttershy complained pitifully. She'd taken to hanging out at Sunset's house most of the day since shortly after school enrollment, largely to get away from her brother, who had evidently made a scene at the public pool and so thoroughly embarrassed Fluttershy she refused to even be in the same house as him. Fluttershy wore a bright, breezy tropical print skirt, sandals with a butterfly ornament on the straps, and a light pink tank top which was presently pulled up and pinned back to bare the undersides of her breasts, which were red and blistery and to which she was applying medicated lotion from a bottle.

Sunset, who was wearing a somewhat loose-fitting dark grey sports bra and purple shorts, tilted her head. "You know, if you wore a bra, you wouldn't get all rashy like that," she said.

"I know," Fluttershy said, grimacing as she daubed lotion on and rubbed it in. "But every bra I've ever tried pinched or irritated my skin and I just can't get comfortable in one. Plus, Zephyr Breeze has this irritating little habit of stealing my bras..." She capped the lotion, tossed the swab sponge in the garbage, unpinned her top and pulled it down, and wiped her hands on a tissue. "Sorry about, umm, doing that right in front of you," she said.

"It's cool," Sunset said. "I mean, you helped me put medicine on mine too." She frowned. "He steals your bras? Really?"

Ten days after meeting Fluttershy, Sunset Shimmer had met Zephyr Breeze. Within two minutes of meeting him, she'd felt the urge to kick him in the face, ass, and balls, not necessarily in that order. For her part, Fluttershy actively discouraged Zephyr Breeze from being around whenever she was with friends, but it seemed he was a bit slow to take the hint at times. For a time, Rarity's apartment above the boutique had been a refuge from him, as he seemed indecisive about entering "hostile territory", but when the heat wave settled in, neither she nor Fluttershy really felt like making the trip when relaxing at Sunset's house was closer and easier. It was also less distracting, and Sunset still had some last-minute cramming to do.

"Well, he used to, when I was wearing training bras," Fluttershy said, her face scarlet. "Then I had this, umm...growth spurt..." She gestured to her chest. "Since then I haven't been able to find a bra that's comfortable for me, and when I do bring some home, they disappear from my dresser in a day or two."

"Ugh. And your mom and dad don't do anything about it?"

Fluttershy sighed. "I love my parents, I really do, but they need to learn how to be firm with that twerp," she said. "They're both so afraid of confrontation, and they've seen that I don't mind putting him in his place, so..." She shrugged. "They've more or less left disciplining him to me, I think. At least, I'm the only one who ever punishes him for anything he does."

"Yikes." Sunset frowned. "Like, how?"

Fluttershy grinned a very sly, devious grin. "Well, the last time any of my underwear mysteriously disappeared? I found the box of condoms he keeps in his sock drawer and put it in the bathroom where Mom would see it while she was cleaning." She giggled suddenly. "It was the first time I've ever actually seen Mom get annoyed with him. We were in the living room, and she walked in with this box of condoms and gave Zephyr this look, and just raised her eyebrow..." Her giggles evolved into chilling laughter. "The look on his face!" She pulled out her phone and swiped through her photos, then handed it to Sunset. She looked at the picture and let out a snort of laughter.

"That's downright evil," she said.

"Oh, the funniest part," Fluttershy said, still giggling, "is that they were those, umm..." She blushed. "Well, the ones guys with big...you know...need. And..." She played with her hair, a smug, very un-Fluttershy look on her face. "M-Mom looked at him and s-said..." She smothered a quick giggle fit. "S-said she'd help him pick the...the right size...that he needed the extra small!" With that, she lost it completely, doubling over in helpless laughter, tears streaming from the corners of her eyes.

Sunset also lost it, cackling madly. "Oh. My. GOD!"

"What's got you girls laughing?" Sunset Satin asked as she passed by, peeking into the room.

"Oh, um, I was just telling Sunset about this one time I got back at my brother for being a pest," Fluttershy said sheepishly, poking her fingertips together. "I, umm...w-well, it ended with Mom embarrassing him."

"The condom incident?" Satin asked curiously. "I heard about that. So that was you, huh?"

"Meep! How do you know about that?" Fluttershy asked, mortified.

Satin rolled her eyes. "Who do you think Cherry goes to when she needs to unload?" she said.

"O-oh," Fluttershy said in a small voice.

Satin laughed. "It's fine, dear," she said.

Fluttershy's phone, which Sunset still had, chose that moment to sound a text alert. "Hey, you got a text," Sunset said. "From...Rainbow Dash." She wrinkled her nose. "I've heard you mention that name?"

"Oh, right!" Fluttershy said. "We've been friends since we were little. She's been at soccer camp all summer."

"Well she's back now and she wants to hang," Sunset said, still looking at Fluttershy's phone.

Fluttershy bit her lip. "Umm...text her your address, ask her to come here? If that's OK?" She looked from Sunset to Satin.

"It's fine by me," Satin said. "I haven't seen Rainbow Dash in forever."

Sunset shrugged, typed a text response with the address, and tossed Fluttershy's phone back to her. "Maybe we should invite Rarity over too, make a party of it."

Fluttershy winced. "Rainbow Dash and Rarity aren't really...compatible," she said. "Besides, Rarity's doing something with that new girl, oh what was her name..." She scrolled through her texts, pursing her lips. "Tia, that was it."

"Oh, yeah, her," Sunset said. Seeing Satin had wandered off into the house to do Mom Stuff, she let out a deflating, derisive raspberry and sunk back against the headboard of her bed.

Fluttershy frowned. "You don't like Tia? I didn't know you'd even met her. Um, not that I've met her yet either..."

Sunset had already prepared a cover for this. Furrowing her brow, she said, "We ran into each other when I went in to register. She's Principal Celestia's cousin. Apparently, she knew the old me, and, well..." She shrugged. "Was not a fan."

"Oh," Fluttershy said softly. "Umm...how bad was it...?"

"Awkward," Sunset decided. "I...don't really see the two of us getting along, going by her reaction." She grimaced. "I hope Rarity doesn't plan anything that involves me and Tia, it's not gonna end well."

"Oh, I think we can make sure that doesn't happen," Fluttershy said. "Rarity's very careful about not making any plans with me that include Rainbow Dash unless she can help it. It's not that she and Rainbow hate each other or anything, it's just...they don't have anything in common, you know?"

"Yeah, I can see that."

* * * * *

"I can't believe we're soaking in a hot tub on a day like this," Tia said. She and Rarity sat in the large, luxurious mineral tub at the local day spa; both girls wore one-piece bathing suits, and piles of thick, fluffy towels and baskets of sponges sat around the edges.

"But it does feel lovely, doesn't it darling?" Rarity asked. "It removes so much stress and relaxes your pores!" She sighed happily. "I simply must have a spa day with Fluttershy and Sunset Shimmer before school starts. That poor dear could certainly use a full treatment." She looked across the tub and frowned. "You're making that face." At Tia's inquisitive head tilt, Rarity clarified, "Whenever I mention Sunset Shimmer, you tense up and purse your lips, and there's a bit of...well I'd say apprehension. Do you know her?"

Tia was silent for a long moment, then sighed. "I did, a long time ago," she said. "Or I thought I did."

"Hmm," Rarity said. "You must've known her before she ran away from home." She shook her head. "Such a tragic and dramatic story. You'd know all about it, of course."

Tia shook her head. "Not really," she said. "We had...drifted apart by that point."

"Ah." Rarity nodded thoughtfully. "Well, I've only known her a few weeks, of course, but from what I gather, the person she was before she ran away from home simply doesn't exist anymore. The Sunset Shimmer I've gotten to know isn't anything like the nasty little delinquent she's told me and Fluttershy all about."

"She's told you about...her past?"

"What she's been able to piece together of it," Rarity said. "All she really has to go on are vague things her parents have said and a few old MyStable posts and pictures on her old laptop. Evidently, well..." Rarity worried at her lip. "Evidently, her parents are so overjoyed with the miracle daughter they have now that they're hesitant to say or do anything that might bring the old Sunset Shimmer back. I can't say I blame them, she's quite splendid the way she is."

"How did she manage to reunite with her parents if she doesn't remember anything about her past?" Tia wondered.

Rarity grimaced. "A rather cruel and ironic twist of fate," she said. "Her father hit her with his car. It took several weeks for her to make a full recovery."

*So that's how she ended up with...* "That must've been very difficult for her."

"Mmm," Rarity said. "I saw the bruises the first day she was out and about after the accident. It was horrible, and that was after she'd been healing for a while!"

"I see," Tia said. "I didn't know." Inwardly, she flinched. *Sunset Shimmer...such a terrible thing happened to you, it must have happened that very night we arrived...! Had I known, I would have flown to your side and never left you...*

"Of course, it's a miracle she's alive and well at all," Rarity said airily. "I mean, she ran away from home at thirteen, with an absolute cad of a boyfriend and suspecting she might be pregnant! I can't even begin to imagine how harsh things must have been for her all this time." She clucked her tongue. "I'm just grateful that the girl I met isn't the same as that awful runaway, because I would not want anything to do with someone like that."

"I'm pruning up," Tia announced, standing and rising from the water. "I'm going to go dry off and see if there isn't a massage table open."

"But of course, darling," Rarity said. "I believe I shall be a few more minutes."

Tia grabbed a towel and headed to the change area, shedding her suit and wrapping the towel around her body. As she did so, she thought over everything she'd just heard and sorted it into her mental file on both her own Sunset Shimmer and this world's Sunset.

She, Celestia, and Luna had pieced it together some time ago: the runaway Sunset Shimmer was very likely dead and would never be seen again. While her student's abrupt and frankly vicious appearance at Canterlot High during registration had left a very bitter impression on the two principals and had left Tia herself feeling shame, remorse, and despair, one thing Sunset had said couldn't be denied.

Having their daughter back—even if what they'd gotten back was a pretender using them for her own personal gain—had undeniably affected Sunset Shimmer's parents deeply. Which, for the time being, was a good thing—but who was to say what it meant in the long run? Would Sunset Shimmer reveal her true colors and break their hearts all over again? Would she change, come to understand the value of friendship, become a kinder person?

Of course, when the portal to Equestria opened again, they would both have to return. And then those poor parents' hearts would be broken all over again. Tia bit back a sob on their behalf. "My foolish student," she whispered into the empty change room. "So many innocents will be hurt by your actions..." She frowned. "But who am I to judge?" she asked herself, sitting down heavily and scrubbing her hair. "I ran off after you without a second thought, and in so doing, I may have doomed Equestria..."

She got dressed and pulled out her phone to call for a ride. As she passed through the spa, she made her apologies to Rarity, who was just getting out of the tub. "I don't feel well suddenly," she said gamely. "I believe I'm going to go home and have a rest."

"Yes, of course," Rarity said understandingly. "Perhaps the tub was a bit much with this heat. I'm feeling a bit light headed myself. Perhaps in a day or two, we can do something different? Perhaps involving ice cream?"

Tia smiled. "I'd like that," she said.

* * * * *

With Rainbow Dash arriving, Sunset and Fluttershy migrated to the living room. Fluttershy answered the door to greet her friend, then led her into the house. Sunset studied the girl as she crossed the threshold, taking her measure.

Rainbow Dash was of average height and average, if fit, build. She had bright blue skin, deep red eyes, and a wild mane of hair in several colors of the rainbow. *Is that natural or dyed?* She was dressed in bike shorts, a blue tank top, and sneakers. Sunset was still learning to read human body language, but she got the impression that Rainbow Dash was a girl who always wanted to be in motion, who didn't like sitting still.

"So you're Sunset Shimmer, huh?" Rainbow said as she walked over, giving Sunset the once-over. "Yeah, Shy mentioned she made a new friend. 'Sup?"

"Hey, nice to meet you," Sunset said. "Make yourself at home." As Rainbow dropped onto the couch and spread herself out (Sunset knew immediately why Fluttershy said this girl and Rarity were a bad match), Fluttershy went to the kitchen and returned with cold drinks for all three girls.

"Thanks, Shy, I'd have gotten up and—"

"I needed to move around a bit," Fluttershy demurred as she sat down.

"Thanks, Shy," Rainbow said, uncapping her drink and taking a long gulp. "Man, is it hot out there!"

"Yeah, this heat's a real pain," Sunset said. "So, soccer camp, huh?"

"Yeah, just got back," Rainbow said, grinning cheekily. "Can't wait for tryouts! I'm gonna be the first freshman to make varsity at CHS, watch!" She glanced at Sunset. "How about you? Joining any teams?"

"Probably not," Sunset said with a shrug. "Did Fluttershy tell you about my, umm...situation?"

"All she's told me is she's got a new friend," Rainbow said.

Sunset nodded, and launched into a brief summary of her "situation". When she was finished, Rainbow was leaning forward over the edge of her seat, eyes wide, irises shrunk to pinpricks.

"Wow!" Rainbow cried. "Holy crap, that's like some kinda crazy TV show you're livin'!" She shook her head in disbelief. "And that's all for real? No bullshit?"

"No bullshit," Sunset said, gesturing expansively then letting her hands fall in her lap. "Anyway, I'm not much of an athlete to begin with, but even if I was, I've got so much to deal with just putting my life back together I don't think I'd have time to join a team."

"Yeah, probably," Rainbow said. "Still, make sure you get some exercise. You look like the kind of girl who's proud of her body, you don't wanna let yourself get love handles and chub."

"Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy hissed, mortified.

"Nah, she's right," Sunset said. "I'll probably want to start walking or jogging more." She smiled hopefully. "I could use some company."

"I'd be happy to go jogging with you when I can," Fluttershy said.

"Dunno when I'd be around for it, I mean, I live too far away, but maybe on the weekends if I'm not doin' other stuff," Rainbow said. "Or maybe we can all hit the gym together some weekends!"

"That sounds good," Sunset said. *That sounds exhausting, actually, but it's what humans do, so...*

The three girls spent the rest of the afternoon chatting and watching television, with Sunset and Rainbow getting to know each other and all three of them talking about the new school year. When Rainbow and Fluttershy finally went home an hour before dinner, Satin walked in and smiled. "So! You made another new friend!"

"Yeah, I guess I did," Sunset said with a smile. *Rainbow Dash...I don't know how useful she's going to be to me. I'll have to be careful around her. She strikes me as being way too straightforward and assertive. If I rub her the wrong way, it'll lead to a confrontation, and that might not be one I can win.* She stretched her arms across the back of the couch. "Hey, Mom?"

"Yes?"

"I might need to get some better workout clothes. I have a feeling Rainbow Dash is gonna be dragging me and Fluttershy to the gym a lot..."

* * * * *

The last weekend of August, wave after wave of thunderstorms rolled through Canterlot, darkening the sky and lashing the city with sheets of rain. September arrived, still hot and steamy from the rainfall evaporating, but not quite as hot as it had been most of August. Sunset Shimmer and Fluttershy got out of Desert Sunrise's SUV on the first day of school and walked up the damp, sparkling walkway leading to Canterlot High. By the steps, Sunset could see Tia visiting with Rarity and two other girls. Dozens of other students milled around, some arriving by bike, others by skateboard, and still others being dropped off by parents or the bus.

Sunset frowned as she approached the doors. "Where are we supposed to go?" she wondered.

"I'm not sure," Fluttershy admitted. At that moment, Vice-Principal Luna stepped out of the building, holding a megaphone. She let loose a squeal of feedback, then called out:

"All freshmen, please report to the auditorium for orientation. Just follow the arrows. All other students, please proceed to your homerooms. Welcome to CHS!"

Book One, Chapter 4 (Side Sunset)

"Sunset, this is my daughter Fluttershy. Fluttershy? This...this is Sunset Shimmer."

Sunset Shimmer offered her a hesitant wave and a halfhearted smile of encouragement. "Hi," she said gamely.

"Oh...oh my," Fluttershy whispered, eyes wide and terrified.

Sunset's smile faltered. "Oh," she said, rubbing her left wrist with her right hand. "I...I guess you've heard...things."

Fluttershy squeaked, ducking behind her curtain of cherry blossom pink hair.

"Fluttershy," Sunset Satin said calmly and gently, "Sunset Shimmer...she's completely lost her memory. She barely knows who she is."

Fluttershy blinked, brushing her hair out of her face. "She...she has amnesia?"

"Afraid so," Sunset said gamely. "Everything before I woke up in the hospital a couple of weeks ago is gone. I mean, I recognized my folks, I know how to read and stuff, but..." She gestured haplessly.

"Oh my," Fluttershy whispered.

"She hasn't left the house since she got home from the hospital," Satin continued. "We've been talking about it the last couple of days, how she needs to get out and get some fresh air and sunshine now that her ribs are better." She smiled encouragingly. "How she needs to make some friends since she'll be starting at CHS in the fall."

"Oh! Oh, umm..." Fluttershy shifted awkwardly, picking at her top as she eyed Sunset the way a wary deer might observe a lion.

"You were planning to go clothes shopping today, right?" Cherry Rose said. "Maybe show Sunset where you like to shop?"

"W-well..." Fluttershy swallowed. "A-alright."

"Great," Sunset said. "Let me go change real quick."

"I'll give you some money," Satin said. "In case you see anything you like."

"Thanks," Sunset said. A short while later, she and Fluttershy left the house, walking up the sidewalk. Fluttershy kept shooting awkward, uncomfortable glances at Sunset and toying with her hair. After five minutes, Sunset sighed. "What did your mom tell you about me?" she asked resignedly.

Fluttershy squeaked. "Oh, um...n-nothing..."

Sunset stopped and turned to face her. "Fluttershy, look. Whatever it is, just tell me. I have a pretty good idea what it must be. From what Mom and Dad have told me and from, well...from what I found on my old laptop..." She sighed.

"W-well," Fluttershy stammered nervously. "I...I just know that...that you ran away from home, and your parents moved to...well..." She ducked her head and whispered, "They couldn't stay, not with the way everybody they knew, umm..." She sighed.

Sunset winced. "Ouch. The whole town turned on them because of me?"

"Y-yes," Fluttershy said. Her eyes widened. "O-oh! Um..."

"It's cool," Sunset said. "I...kinda figured out for myself that I was a total bitch before." She jammed her hands in her pockets, head bowed.

Fluttershy tilted her head. "You...you really don't...remember? Anything?"

Sunset sighed. "Not a thing," she said. "Where I went to school, who my friends were, favorite food, favorite band, favorite TV show, anything from before is just gone." She grimaced. "Probably for the best. I know Mom and Dad like me better now than before I ran away. I, uhh...I heard them talking."

Fluttershy winced. "Oh," she whispered. "That...that must've hurt..."

"Not really," Sunset said. "I mean, I...I got into my old MyStable page when I was looking at my old laptop. I...kinda pieced together some of the stuff I did back then, and...I gotta say, I really don't like who that girl was." That much was true. The more she'd learned about this world's Sunset Shimmer, the more she hated the girl and honestly hoped she'd ended up dead in a ditch. "From what I can tell, I had it bad for this real asshole named Thundercracker. Apparently, I was..." She shuddered genuinely, wrapping her arms around herself. "Having sex with him."

"Oh my," Fluttershy squeaked, her cheeks burning red.

"Yeah," Sunset said. "I can't imagine what the hell was wrong with me. There's pictures of the guy on my laptop and..." She chuckled. "Would not touch him with a ten foot pole, you know what I mean?"

Fluttershy giggled. "I know a few boys like that," she said. Under her breath, she muttered, "Like my brother."

"Yeah, so..." Sunset grimaced. "Near as I can figure out, apparently I thought he'd gotten me pregnant, I freaked out, and I ran away from home."

Fluttershy gasped. "Oh my god," she breathed, eyes wide. "Were...were you...?"

Sunset shook her head. "Last couple of status updates I posted before I disappeared completely seem like it was a false alarm. Evidently, Thundercracker had ditched me long before that."

Fluttershy frowned. "What a jerk," she said sourly.

"I know, right?" Sunset sighed. "Anyway, that's pretty much all I know about Sunset Shimmer, thirteen-year-old runaway."

Fluttershy blinked. "Thirteen? You were...when you were thirteen?! You mean you're my age?!"

"Well, yeah," Sunset said, blinking. "Why?"

Fluttershy blushed. "O-oh," she said, fidgeting. "I-it's just, with your voice and, umm...and your figure..." She ducked her head. "You kinda seem older than fifteen."

"Uhh...thanks? I guess I'll take that as a compliment." Sunset looked Fluttershy up and down with a smirk. "You're no slouch yourself," she said. "You could be a model."

Fluttershy squeaked, hiding behind her hair again. "Oh, n-no," she whimpered. "I...I don't really like people looking at me..."

*Yeah, good luck with that,* Sunset thought. *Face like that, body like that, no bra?* "So, shopping?"

"O-oh! Right." Fluttershy composed herself, and they continued on the way. As they walked, Sunset struck up casual conversation with Fluttershy, pumping her for information. The longer they talked, the easier it was to get Fluttershy to open up, though she was very reserved. If she wasn't Sunset's first exposure to her peers in this world, she probably wouldn't have bothered with such a shy, scared, recalcitrant girl. Still, once Sunset figured out how to probe past the wall of shyness Fluttershy built around herself, she was able to learn a few useful things about Canterlot, as well as finding out what Fluttershy's hobbies and interests were. She became very animated when the subject turned to animals, and sullen and snarky when she spoke of her brother, Zephyr Breeze. Apparently, Fluttershy didn't have very many friends herself—her best friend, it seemed, was a girl named Rainbow Dash who played on most of the sports teams at school; she also mentioned a girl named Rarity who worked at a local boutique, who she had gone on a couple of day spa trips with in junior high.

It wasn't long until Sunset met Rarity in person. Fluttershy took her to a small boutique that was tastefully decorated, with neatly arranged racks and shelves of clothing, shoes, and accessories. There were only a few customers; Fluttershy led Sunset to the counter, where a bored-looking girl with flawless white skin and long, curled dark purple hair was reading while she minded the store. "Hello Rarity," Fluttershy said.

Rarity looked up and smiled. "Oh! Fluttershy, darling, hello! How is your summer going?"

"It's going fine," Fluttershy said. "We just got back from our vacation. Umm...this is Sunset Shimmer, she's...she's Mom's friend's daughter, and she'll be going to CHS this fall."

Rarity eyed Sunset critically. "Hmm. I don't remember you from junior high," she said. "And with that glamorous hair, I absolutely would."

"Uhh...new in town," Sunset hedged. "Just...just getting settled in."

"Ah, I see," Rarity said. "Well! Any friend of Fluttershy's. Please, look around, there's no finer selection anywhere in town!"

The girls spent the better part of an hour browsing the boutique and trying on outfits. Unfortunately, the heavy activity ultimately put a strain on Sunset's ribs; as she laid a couple of purchases on the counter, she suddenly staggered, hissing in pain and clutching her side.

"Goodness! Are you alright, dear?" Rarity asked.

Sunset gritted her teeth. "Ribs," she hissed.

"Oh my goodness...! I'm so sorry, we walked all the way here, we could've gotten a ride, I..." Fluttershy covered her face with her hands.

"It's...it's not your fault," Sunset said. "I'm just...I overdid it a little for my first day out of the house."

Rarity clicked her tongue. "Why don't you take her upstairs, Fluttershy?" she suggested. "You can rest in my room. Do you have any pain medication?" At Sunset's nod, Rarity said, "Take some and rest. I'm about due for my lunch break anyway, I'll close up down here and get us all something to drink and some ice cream upstairs."

"Come on, Sunset. Can you get up the stairs? I'll help you," Fluttershy said gently, guiding Sunset upstairs. She soon found herself in a small apartment, decorated much like the boutique below. Fluttershy led her to a bedroom at the back which, even though Sunset had only just met the girl, screamed 'Rarity', and propped her up on a chaise lounge, offering her a couple of large, plush velvet throw pillows which Sunset leaned against gratefully.

Rarity arrived a few minutes later with a pitcher of iced tea and three glasses. "I'll get us some ice cream in just a moment," she said. She tilted her head. "Whatever did you do to your ribs, darling?"

"Got hit by a car," Sunset said shakily as she got a couple of pills out of her pocket while Fluttershy poured the tea. Sunset swallowed her medicine with a huge gulp of tea, then leaned back.

Rarity gasped theatrically. "Good heavens! I hope you sued the driver into bankrupcy."

Sunset chuckled weakly. "It was my dad," she said. "Long story, don't...don't wanna get into it."

"Oh," Rarity said, blinking.

Sunset looked around. "You live above the boutique?" she asked.

"Yes," Rarity said. "Well...it's more that the owner isn't doing anything with this apartment and had a bad experience the last time he tried renting it out, so he let me have it as my own space to use as I please. It's convenient because it lets me keep the boutique open late on school nights, gives me a place to work on my own designs..." She grimaced. "Gives me a somewhat better environment to entertain guests than my actual home, with my embarrassing parents and frustrating little sister..."

"Sweetie Belle isn't that bad," Fluttershy chided.

"Isn't—!" Rarity huffed theatrically. "Fluttershy, she does nothing but make messes wherever she goes! She's the only person I know who can burn orange juice!"

Fluttershy blinked at that. "W-well..." she began. She paused. "Umm...I've got nothing," she finished lamely.

"How the heck do you burn orange juice?" Sunset wondered.

"Sweetie Belle found a way," Rarity muttered. "Well, I'll just go get that ice cream now." She bustled out of the room.

Once she was out of earshot, Sunset looked over at Fluttershy. "She's a drama queen, isn't she?"

"Well...yes." Fluttershy tilted her head, surveying Sunset critically. "Are...are you sure you're alright? Should you call your mother to come get you?"

"I'll be fine," Sunset said, waving her away. "I actually did need to get out, get some exercise. I've just...I've been putting it off because I needed to study. To, well..." She shifted slightly, adjusting her pillows. "Remember what I said about my amnesia? I'm...I'm having to learn how to be a teenager again. Not just all the stuff about my own life I forgot, but everything. When I woke up in the hospital, I didn't even know what a telephone was."

Fluttershy's eyes widened. "Oh my," she said. "That's...that's awful." She frowned. "What do the doctors say?"

Sunset shook her head. "They don't know. It's not a physical injury. It's..." She flapped her hands in a vague gesture. "My mind just went blank at some point. Everything except how to talk, read, and do math went away."

Fluttershy sat down, folding her legs underneath her. "That's terrible," she said. "Maybe you suffered some kind of terrible trauma?"

"It's about as good a guess as any." Sunset shook her head. "Anyway, I've spent every waking moment since I first woke up in the hospital studying, relearning how to be a normal teenage girl."

"I can't even imagine something like that," Fluttershy said, her eyes sad.

Rarity walked back in with a tray bearing three tantalizing ice cream sundaes and an ice pack. "I thought this might help, darling," she said as she handed Sunset the ice pack.

"Thanks," Sunset said. She pulled up her shirt and shifted her breast around to place the ice pack where she needed it. As she did so, Rarity let out a mild shriek of alarm. Sunset's eyes widened. "Oh! Sorry," she said sheepishly, hastily covering her chest with one arm. "Didn't mean—I mean, sorry for just flashing you like that—"

"That's not it at all!" Rarity exclaimed, eyes wide. "Sorry, darling, but...your poor breast is an absolute mess of bruises!"

"It does look pretty bad," Fluttershy said with a wince.

Sunset relaxed. "Yeah," she said. "It's still a little tender and I'm not supposed to wear a bra for a while. It looks worse than it is, though, really."

"Still..." Rarity frowned as she handed Fluttershy a sundae, then offered one to Sunset once she finished with her ice pack and pulled her shirt back down. "And during bikini season, of all times!"

"I...think Sunset Shimmer has more important things on her mind than bikinis and the beach this summer," Fluttershy said. "Besides, there's always Spring Break or...or next summer for that."

"Yes, I suppose so," Rarity agreed. "So, where did you attend school before, darling?"

Sunset grimaced. She glanced at Fluttershy, who gave her an encouraging smile. "Go ahead, tell Rarity what you told me," she said gently. "She'll understand. You need friends who understand what you're going through, right?"

Sunset gave her a half-smile. "I guess so, yeah." *It will make it easier to cover any slips I make if I have people around me who can back me up...* Sunset once again launched into the spiel about her "amnesia" and the troubled past she'd evidently completely forgotten. As she spoke, Rarity leaned forward, literally hanging on the edge of her seat, eyes wide.

When Sunset finished, Rarity let out a dramatic gasp, placing the back of one hand to her forehead. "What a tragic tale," she declared. "I must admit...the runaway you describe sounds like the last sort of person I would ever associate with. But..." She eyed Sunset critically, pursing her lips. "Whatever your past...ahem...boo-boos, if Fluttershy has taken a liking to you, you must be a decent person. And you have been through quite an ordeal, it seems." She smiled. "I would be more than happy to help you readjust."

"Thanks," Sunset said.

The girls finished their ice cream after that, with Sunset sitting back and letting Rarity dominate the conversation, which mostly turned to light gossip and talk of upcoming movies and Rarity's latest celebrity crush. Once Sunset's pain pills kicked in, she decided it was time to get out of Rarity's hair. After exchanging phone numbers and social media information with both girls, Sunset and Fluttershy left the boutique.

"Well, she's...interesting," Sunset said.

Fluttershy giggled. "She's very nice," she said. "And a good friend to have. She's always doing things for her friends. One time, a not-so-nice boy in our class spilled punch all over my dress at a school dance because I wouldn't, umm...take a walk with him." Fluttershy wrung her hands in front of her, bowing her head. "The dress was ruined, and it was a very nice, very expensive dress. Rainbow Dash wanted to beat the boy up, but Rarity had a better idea. I, umm...I'd rather not get into what she did, because it wasn't very nice, but...he hasn't bothered anybody since then. Oh, and Rarity made me a brand new dress that was even nicer than the one he ruined."

"Huh," Sunset said. *Mental note: Be careful around Rarity. Keep on her good side, never know when I'll need a favor.* "So, what else were you planning to do today?"

"Huh? Oh, well, I was planning to go by this little pet shop I like," Fluttershy said. "I need a new brush for my bunny Angel, and I wanted to see if they have this new brand of pet treats in yet. But I can do that later, if—"

"No, that sounds fine to me," Sunset said. "I don't have anywhere in particular I want to go, so—" Sunset broke off mid-sentence, eyes drawn to something on the other side of the road. A familiar mane of multihued pastel hair, tied up in a high ponytail. Her heart skipped a beat. "Celestia," she whispered.

"Sunset? What's wrong?" Fluttershy asked, following her gaze.

"Nothing," Sunset said. "Hey, I've got an idea. Why don't we go over this way? I'd really, really like to see what's over this way."

"Well...okay," Fluttershy said, casting a worried look over her shoulder as Sunset led her off aimlessly down a side street. All she saw were Lyra Heartstrings, Sweetie Drops, and an unfamiliar girl who was chatting animatedly with them. A girl with pale strawberry-milk skin and beautiful pastel hair, whose eyes drifted briefly in their direction.

Fluttershy saw the girl's eyes widen before her line of sight was cut off by a building.

* * * * *

The two girls spent the next two hours wandering around town aimlessly, visiting this shop or that. After a couple of hours, Sunset's ribs started bothering her again, and Fluttershy decided enough was enough; she called Sunset Satin to pick them up, and stuck around for a few minutes at their house while Satin clucked over her daughter's ribs. "I need to get home now," Fluttershy said after a time. "Umm...I'll come by tomorrow, see how you're doing," Fluttershy said. "Maybe...maybe see if there's anything I can help you with?"

"Sounds great," Sunset said with a genuine smile. "Thanks."

Once Fluttershy left, Sunset waved off her mother's hovering, saying she just needed to lie down and rest, then retreated to her bedroom. She stripped down to her panties, checking her ribs and left breast in the mirror; wincing, she applied the analgesic ointment the hospital had given her, then put on a clean tank top and flopped onto her bed, folding her arms behind her head.

Princess Celestia had always harped on and on about how important it was to make friends. Sunset had never paid heed in the past; she'd always felt she was so far above her peers that interacting with them would only hold her back. They were only there to be awed by her achievements, after all.

Now, though, she realized how misguided her notions had been. Friends were a useful thing to have: they were allies, allies one could rely on to advance one's goals and plans. Today, she had made two potential allies. Rarity, she could tell, would either come to loathe her or be a great asset. Clearly a social butterfly and no stranger to putting on airs—who did she think she was fooling with that fake accent?—Sunset saw in Rarity a girl with ambition. Sunset could respect ambition.

Fluttershy...

Fluttershy could be useful to her. If she was careful, if she took her time and didn't push, didn't press...it could take months, but Sunset was confident she could turn that shy, quiet girl into a useful weapon, an ally in her quest to prove her superiority.

*Besides,* she thought, *she's...really pretty.* Sunset closed her eyes, thinking about Fluttershy's gentle eyes, soft smile, round face, and long cherry blossom pink hair.

For the first time she could remember, Sunset Shimmer looked forward to having a friend—if Fluttershy was willing to be friends on her terms. Whatever those terms ended up being.

The faintly warm feeling she felt ebbed as she remembered the one moment of her day that had not been pleasant.

Celestia.

*Was that really her? Was that Princess Celestia? Or was that this world's Celestia? Does this world even have a Celestia?*

Mind drifting back and forth between the brief glimpse of Celestia and Fluttershy's kind face, Sunset drifted off into a light sleep full of half-dreams and conflicted images.

Interlude IV: Fear Princess

Three days passed.

According to the timepieces in the Hall of Time, it was six in the morning.

Cadance stood on the tower balcony with Shining Armor at her side and Zecora at a respectful distance. Her eyes were closed, her magic searching the horizon, feeling the warmth of the sun.

Her horn lit up with a pale blue aura. She slowly rose into the air, spreading her wings wide.

A hot, bright presence, full of warmth and life, entered her mind.

Thou art not the Sun Princess. Wherefore touchest thou my light with thine?

I am Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. The Sun Princess has disappeared. Equestria cannot survive without your warmth. I am the only alicorn remaining. Please, allow me to bring your light to the world.

An eternity of silence stretched across a span of seconds.

It is not thine destiny to deliver my light upon this land. Thine destiny has yet to reveal itself to thee.

That is true, perhaps, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Please. I beg of you. Let me be your steward.

Thy heart is pure and kind and just. It will be permitted. Summon me forth, that I may warm and light thine world.

Thank you.

And slowly, the sun rose.

Shining Armor gasped in awe as the red lip of the sun kissed the horizon, bathing the sky in a paintbrush of morning hues. Slowly, the red disc rose, becoming a shimmering orange ball of light and warmth.

Cadance dropped to the stone floor, her legs folding under her and her wings wilting. Shining Armor rushed to her side, stroking her back with his hoof.

"Well done, young princess," Zecora said softly. "One more to go, and we are out of this mess."

"I think...I'm going to sleep until dusk," Cadance said woozily. "That...that took a lot of out of me."

* * * * *

The remainder of the day was chaotic at the castle, as Kibitz, Raven, and the guards struggled to herd nobles away at the gates. "Princess Celestia is tired, she does not wish to hold court!" "The Princess is recovering from an illness, she needs her rest!" "Nobody cares about your ridiculous plan for a hoof-rating system, Zesty! Now GO!" And so on.

Cadance slept through it all.

Night came, and Cadance once again ascended the tallest tower, with Shining Armor and Zecora at her side. She gently lowered the sun below the horizon; it acknowledged her respectfully.

Once the sun had set, Cadance took a deep breath. "Okay. I raised the sun, raising the moon should be easy. Right?"

"As you say," Zecora said, nodding. "You know the way."

"Right." Cadance closed her eyes, her horn glowing as she searched for the moon.

Sister?

Cadance's brow furrowed.

Sister...? ...Neigh, thou art not Sister. Who art thou? Where is Sister?

Cadance gasped. What?

I am lonely. I am cold. I do not like it here. Where is Sister? I am sorry. I am so sorry. Please...please do not leave me here with It. It torments me. It will not let me rest. It is angry. So angry. So cold. Please—

The voice, plaintive and soft, was broken by a harsh, blood-curdling laugh that hammered at the sides of Cadance's skull.

BUT WHAT IS THIS? WHO IS SO FOOLISH AS TO DISTURB OUR PRISON?

Cadance gasped, dropping to the floor and bracing her knees. "No," she whimpered.

"Cadance? Cadance, what...something's wrong!" She barely heard Shining Armor over the roaring of wind and laughter tearing through her mind like a tornado. "Zecora! What's going on?"

"I have no idea, unless..." Zecora gasped. "NO! It cannot be! Bind her magic, she is in distress!"

"I...I don't know how to...should I put a shield around—?"

Shining Armor was blown back as a malevolent shell of black wind engulfed Cadance.

"N-no! Don't...! STAY AWAY! NO!!" Cadance screamed.

The laughter in her head escaped into the cold night. Shining Armor steeled himself, horn at the ready. Zecora backed up to the tower door, pawing the floor nervously.

The moon shot into the sky like a cannonball. The dark shadow across its surface, the Mare in the Moon, glowed black, then melted away like dripping ink.

All across Equestria, ponies looked up in astonishment, pointing and whispering.

"I did not foresee such a catastrophe!" Zecora yelled over the wind and laughter.

"What's going on?" Shining Armor yelled.

"I don't know how, it is far too soon," Zecora yelled back. "But this appears to be the return of—!"

A jet black alicorn with pale, slit-pupiled eyes dropped onto the floor between the three equines, landing hard enough to crack the ancient marble. The wind and the laughter died down all at once.

She fixed them all with a cold, triumphant smile.

"NIGHTMARE MOON," she finished for Zecora.

Cadance stood, turning to face Nightmare Moon, her eyes full of fear and sadness. "No," she whispered. "What have I done?"

Nightmare Moon threw back her head and laughed. "I should thank you, child! I should thank you for freeing me from my prison. I believe I shall! Yes! I shall thank you by bestowing upon you the gift of eternal night!"

"Who. ARE. You?" Shining Armor growled, aiming his horn at Nightmare Moon.

Nightmare Moon snorted. "Such an ignorant foal. Do you know nothing of my legend? Of the history of Equestria?"

"Shining Armor, you know who this is," Cadance said shakily. "The Mare in the Moon. Nightmare Moon!"

"But...no!" Shining Armor protested. "That's...that's just an old mares' tale!"

"It is no tale, it is all too true," Zecora said grimly. "It is Nightmare Moon herself who stands before you."

"Indeed it is! And now, if you will kindly direct me to wherever that COWARD CELESTIA is hiding herself, we have unfinished business..."

Cadance flew around to stand directly in front of Nightmare Moon, interposing herself between her and Zecora. She bowed her head respectfully. "Please, Princess Luna, listen to me."

"I am NO LONGER Princess Luna! I am NIGH—"

"You ARE Princess Luna," Cadance interrupted firmly. "The good, kind, gentle mare you once were is still inside you. I heard her crying out. I know you're still in there, inside that demon! I know your heart is aching, longing for your sister. I know you want to see her again. Not to destroy her, not to continue your jealous grudge, but..." Cadance looked at Shining Armor, then back at Zecora, then to Nightmare Moon again. "But to make her understand. To hear her reassure you, like she always did."

Nightmare Moon scoffed. "FOOL! What do you know of such things?"

"I know what I've seen, what I've read," Cadance said. "I have taken the vision potion. I have seen the past. I have heard Celestia speak of you. I have seen the pain and regret in her eyes."

"Pain?! PAIN?! LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT PAIN!" Nightmare Moon roared. "Pain is watching Celestia take EVERYTHING! All the glory, all the worship, all the love! I created beautiful night skies! I protected ponies from the beasts of the night! I patrolled their dreams, watching over them in their slumber! WHERE WAS MY GRATITUDE? WHERE WAS MY WORSHIP? Neigh, they shunned my beautiful night! They hid in their homes and slumbered while the moon and stars danced in the sky! They barely knew I existed!"

"Celestia knew," Cadance said, tears dripping from her eyes. "And she loved you. Always. Even now, a thousand years later, she loves you. She misses you. She has never forgiven herself for...for that horrible day..."

"Pretty words from a pretty but empty-headed child," Nightmare Moon scoffed. "You are ignorant, your mind shaped by the lies my sis—" She trailed off, her muzzle crinkling, her eyes narrowing. "Child," she said slowly. "Why were you trying to raise the moon?"

Cadance hesitated, drawing up a hoof. She looked to Shining Armor, who shook his head frantically. She looked to Zecora, who gave her a long, measuring gaze, then closed her eyes and nodded once.

Bracing herself, Cadance met Nightmare Moon's gaze squarely, tilting her chin up. "Princess Celestia is missing," she admitted. "She disappeared through a portal to another world four nights ago. The portal is sealed. We can't get her back."

"Missing?" Nightmare Moon echoed in an amused tone. "Celestia is missing. How interesting..." She chuckled darkly. "How poetic."

Cadance took a deep breath. "Princess Luna," she said firmly. "Without a ruler, Equestria is lost. I've just learned to raise and lower the sun and moon, but my magic is not strong. I cannot handle the task of moving the heavens and take Celestia's place on the throne. I'm not ready. Equestria needs a real leader." She hesitated. "If...if you truly want the adulation and love of your little ponies, the love you felt cheated out of all those years ago..."

"Cadance, what are you—" Shining Armor interrupted. Zecora raised a hoof to silence him.

"Princess Luna, if you will allow the sun to rise and set as it is meant to be, if you will not force Equestria into an eternal night, then..." Cadance steeled herself. "The throne is yours. Equestria, your kingdom to rule, alone."

Nightmare Moon blinked. She tilted her head, raising an eyebrow. "An interesting offer," she said. "Of course, I must ask: How do you intend to stop me from simply taking Equestria as my own without agreeing to your terms?"

"I don't," Cadance said. "I'm not strong enough. Nopony is. But I know that inside you is a good mare who loves and misses her sister dearly, and...and will not make her little ponies suffer while we try to bring her back."

"And what is to stop me from ensuring you can NEVER bring Celestia back?"

A flask of white potion floated from Cadance's saddlebag to Nightmare Moon.

Nightmare Moon snorted. "Do you think me a fool?"

"I have nothing to gain from deceiving you," Cadance said. "I need you. I can't do this without you. I'm not ready." She paused, then added, "This is what Celestia would want. She would want her beloved sister, Princess Luna, to look after her little ponies."

Nightmare Moon hesitated. Then, cautiously, she took the potion in her own magic and drank it. Her eyes shone a brilliant white, and her wings flared wide.

A long, tense silence fell.

A lone tear trickled down Nightmare Moon's cheek.

Her eyes stopped glowing as the flask dropped to the floor and shattered.

Nightmare Moon scuffed the floor with a hoof. "I will rule Equestria," she said softly. "Both the night...AND the day. I will not stop you from searching for my sister. I will do nothing to prevent you from bringing her back." She raised her head, and her voice became harsh again. "But make no mistake. I wish for her return only because she and I have unfinished business!"

Cadance let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you," she said. She bowed; after giving Shining Armor a sharp glance, he bowed as well, as did Zecora.

"Well then," Nightmare Moon said, licking her lips. "I suppose it's time I see firsthoof just what sort of empire my sister has built while I was away..."

Author's Note

This is the end of the Cadance Interludes.

This is not the end of this side of the story. Beginning in June or July, the ongoing adventures of Cadance, Shining Armor, Zecora, and Nightmare Moon will continue in the sidestory to Cheer Princess, Fear Princess.

Beginning with the next Side Celestia chapter, this story will return to the human world and stay there.