Pinkamena's Loyal Assistant

by Y-T-Mellon

Rating: mature
Tags: Dark, Comedy, Romance, Random, Alternate Universe
Length: 1329

I'm Bonebeat. My mentor is a psychopathic serial killer that made a sort of blog for me to answer questions to what she calls 'the outside ponies'. I also help her with most of her work.

Pinkamena is my mentor, and my friend. She decided to make some weird blog for me to develops to answer 'outside ponies'. I don't know how that works, but it's also making sales at Suagrcube Corner go higher, making her happy. I wish I was ready for the chaos that ensued.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-15 15:33:21 UTC

The First Smile of the Bat-pony!

The First Smile of the Bat-pony!

I sighed as I look at the sunshine. It's so beautiful. I wonder what it's like outside with other ponies. I look at my boss with her pinkness, coaxsing someone to get her drugged cupcake. I'm surprised she was able to have a poofy mane at all since the last pony escaped. Her name isinkamena Diane Pie, but now days, she prefers to be called Pinkamena. To her friends, it's Pinkie. To me, it's Pinkamena. I remembered when she took me in her little 'business'. I had lost my job, my home, and all my friends. It was a long story too. I asked for a job at her workplace. She was skeptical at first, but we warmed up a little.

We're still at least twenty thousand degrees below zero, but she's nice. She'll give me a cold shoulder no doubt, but I have a feeling she has something for me today. She walked up during lunch, and gave me a camera. She told me that she had set up a blog for me to handle my over-enthusiasm for work. Now, here I am, looking at a computer, trying to figure out what to do. I sighed, and turned on the camera.

"Hello, my name is Bonebeat, I work with my boss at Suagrcube and stuff... Oh, and I'll answer any questions you have for me. Yes, I mean any kind of questions! Hope you ask away!" I said. I turn off the camera, and sighed. I'm hoping I'm able to be good at this. I don't want to disappoint my boss. I look at the clock and smile. It's time for work. I trot into the work room where the boss is, looking at her subject. I look at the poor pony and shook my head. She's purple with lighter shades of hair, and her cutie mark was a few smiling sunflowers. I think her name was Cheerilee.

"Now, let's see, what do I want to use today?" She asks. I look at all the tools and gasped with an idea. I ran over to the kitchen and got a plastic bag and ran back over. Pinkamena looks at what I brought and tilts her head. "A plastic bag?" She asks. I nod and I wrote down the plans. She smirks at all my creative ideas. "Let me get started!" She exclaimed. The pony, shaking in her shackles, watched in fear as the pink pony puts the bag on top of her muzzle, making it hard to breath. Pinkamena smirks and pokes a hole through it. She tapes it down and trots over to her scalpel.

"My assistant here has an ingenious plan to have fun with you my friend," Pinkamena said. She starts gently laying the scalpel on the pony's ear and in a quick movement, she cut the ear. The mare starts trying to scream, but the bag can allow her so much. A noise came out, muffled. When the mare tried to breathe in, the bag scrunched up and the hole was covered. She was able to breathe a little, but it was futile. Pinkamena looks at me. "Why don't you show our art to your blog?" She asks. I nod, smiling. I brought the camera, and watched as Pinkamena started to cut open the the patient. I smiled cheerfully as I was handed a heart.

"This is your treat," she said, cutting off one of the lungs. I smiled and ran off, forgetting the camera. Pinkamena looks at it and smirks. She trots over, blood all over her and her curtain-like mane.

"Why hello everypony! I'm Pinkamena, the bat pony's teacher! I hope you enjoy our little art, it's quite a screamer," she said. The muffled pony screams. "Shut up! Can't you see you're part of a little show?" She asks. She smiles at the camera. "See you guys around!" She winks and turns off the camera. I came back, smiling sheepishly and got my camera. I got my camera out and uploaded the videos. I smiled and went about my day. I brought the camera, video taping most of the day, the surgeries, and when it came to night time, I sat in my bed in the room that my mentor used to sleep, until her adopted parents went away. I smiled at the camera, and waved.

"Guess this is goodbye till next time guys! I'm gonna get some sleep, and before I do that, I've been working on my smile like Pinkamena told me to! See?" I smiled, my fangs showing with blood dripping from the treat I got. My eyes shrank a little, but my irises stayed big. I went back to my normal face and normally smiled. " I'm gonna go to bed, but I plan to make the videos every week! Now, I'm gonna stop this video now because it's apparently illegal to record all of today, but for now, ciao!" I said, turning off the camera. I trotted over to my laptop and started to edit the video, deleting most of the content that was boring. I smiled in thought of being able to talk to ponies. I can see myself having a conversation to someone rthat isn't dead or begging for me to stop. One I was done, I saved the footage, and uploaded the final video for today. I see the thumbnail, and saw a bat-pony with a yellow coat, red eyes, a couple slashes of blood on his fur, and my signature smile. I yawned and returned to my bed. I sighed relaxing as I snuggled up in my blankets. Nighty night me. I can't wait for ponies to start asking me questions, I bet I'll even make friends!

First questions!

I turn on the camera, crunching on the bone I was given. "Hi everyone, so this week was complete chaos! But enough of that, let's answer questions!" I look at the computer.

"Do you even lift bro?" asks Anonymous.

"Um, I guess I do, I lift blood bags and drain some blood from the tub and then drink it!" I answer.

"How much do you like Pinkamena?" asks Random Bro.

"... Um, maybe a lot?"

"It's dangerous to go alone take this! *Hands you shades*"

"What would I need shades for? I'm not going anywhere anytime soon."

"Yo, bro, tell Pinkamena that you love her!" says Anonymous.

"No."

"Um, can we see what your work is usually like?" Asks Flutterfly.

"Sure! I'm gonna pick today's number, so you can watch the begi-" I stopped when I look at the number. "Go ahead and lay down on the table!" I say.

"You people are a bunch of psychos! How do you live with yourself, killing ponies day by day and then eating them!?" asks Noscopbro

"Well, it took some getting used to at first, but now it's fun! You should come over and have a nice party, we make the best cupcakes!"

"Whatever happened to you and your old friends?" asks Applefruit

"... Long story... I think that's all the questions I'll answer today, bye for now! Oh right, some of you have questions for Pinkamena, welp let's go!"

Pinkamena smiles at the computer screen, looking at all the questions.

"Hey, how long has Bonebeat been working for you?" asks Anonymous.

"About five years."

"Do you like him in any way?" asks Anonybro

"Well..."

"Yo, bro, tell Bonebeat that you love him!" says Anonymous. Pinkamena blushes angrily and gets out her knife.

"I think I know who's number is up!" I walk in to see her angry and I turn off the camera and give her a worried face. "It's fine Bonebeat. I just saw a weird question, but how were yours?" She asks. I give her a smile. "Great, goodnight Bonebeat, see you in the morning." I salute and trot off. I bet she's gonna get some bad questions later...