Flash Sentry steals your Waifu!

You are Flash Sentry

A little smiling and some blushing.

That's all it seemed to take. This clumsy Alicorn princess bumps into you and all you do is smile. It's all you can do; your job is to serve them so you must be polite. You want to tell her to watch where she is going, but if you did that your Princess, Cadance, would have you thrown out or imprisoned. So, you smile and say something polite.

"We've got to stop bumping into each other like this."

You help her to her hooves and walk away. Clearly, she blushes as she continues to converse with her friends. They argue about having a crush, but you don't really care. All you know is that fillies find you hot! The fact is that Twilight Sparkle, the newly crowned Princess of Friendship, is now totally infatuated with you. Your confidence builds as you strut your newly found swagger.

Watch out fillies and mares, you think to yourself, Flash Sentry is here and he is adorable!

Walking back to your bunk in the castle barracks, you test your swag on various attendants and guests you come across. As you strut, you wink and point to test their reactions. While many swoon and blow kisses back, there are still some that grunt and roll their eyes. Perhaps this is something that cannot be mastered at once; you will have to spend time refining your technique if you want to conquer the hearts of all Equestria.

Luckily, as a guard you will travel the entirety of the land and the disproportion of female ponies will give you ample opportunity to perfect your approach. In a few short years, your efforts will surely be rewarded.

You are Twilight Sparkle

You've been a princess for a few years now. You've saved Equestria numerous times over and helped many ponies in matters of friendship. You were once such a quiet filly with no friends, save your faithful assistant Spike. Now, most, if not all of Equestria calls you a friend and you will never again feel so lonely.

So why is it you feel so alone?

As you wander the halls of your castle, you pass by many treasures, trophies, and mementos of your travels. Trinkets from so many friends, acquaintances, family, even some from reformed enemies. You study them all until you come to a sudden realization: there is nothing from a very special somepony!

Matters of the heart have never really come up in your travels and experiences; seldom have you even thought of it. Today, however, loneliness has hit you like a paralyzing blow from Tirek. You find yourself sitting alone in the long corridor with your lifeless mementos wishing you could trade it all to hear the clippity-clop of tiny hoofs and a big, strong stallion to embrace.

All of your friends seemed to have found a very special somepony and today they were enjoying each other's company. Rainbow Dash is now a Wonderbolt and finally managed to hook up with one of her heroes, Soarin'. Today they would be practicing a new routine before going on a date in the clouds. Fluttershy is spending some time in the Everfree Forest with Discord to learn and care for all the new and wonderful woodland critters. She could now wander throughout the forest without fear with her immortal and magical protector. Pinkie Pie is traveling across Equestria with Cheese Sandwich. They aren't technically in a relationship, but everypony knew it would only be a matter of time before it happened and this trip would most likely be the catalyst. Even Spike finally managed to convince Rarity to go out on a date. That's why he wasn't here today, she finally relented to his advances and agreed to see how it would go. As for Applejack, well, it seemed she was married to her farm.

So that was it. All your friends are happy except for lonely, old unloved Twilight Sparkle! you pity to yourself. As a princess, are you destined to live the long, lonely life of a spinster? Are you to suffer the same romantic limbo as Celestia? Perhaps not! you think to yourself. Cadance is a Princess and she was allowed to get married. She can even have foals!

New optimism inspires you. Perhaps all hope is not lost. Celestia has not yet expressly forbidden you from seeking a relationship. Maybe you can still be happy if you just find the right stallion. But whom could you choose? You remember the flashy orange pegasus guard pony that works for Cadance. When visiting your sister-in-law, you still occasionally see him and blush at the cute and adorable guard with the dreamy spikey hair. You had such a crush on him when you first saw him; it must have been love at first sight! You wonder if he is still available and if he would be interested.

After reasoning to yourself, you become convinced that a pony that cute would surely be taken already. Besides, Cadance already married a Royal Guard, what sort of example would you set if you too started a relationship with one? But if the heart wants what it wants, surely you can't ignore it.

You start contemplating on other options. First in your mind is Big McIntosh. He's still available, much to the delight of every mare and dismay of every stallion in Ponyville. You often see him with mares like Cheerilee, and when he's alone every mare in Ponyville seems to stare at him. However, he never seems to be in an actual relationship. Maybe he's playing the field? But he's so quiet, you fear like you wouldn't be able to talk to him. You can't see yourself as a farmer's wife anyway. Still, he's very nice, polite, and easy on the eyes.

You contemplate other options. There's the Doc...no, Derpy has been pursuing him for a while, it wouldn't be right. Bulk Biceps? He's very sweet, but yells so much. He also lacks even an average intelligence. Caramel and Toe-Tapper are in relationships. The Dude and his bowling pony friends are just...odd. Your list of potential mates is running very thin and you don't want to have to leave Ponyville in search of a stallion.

As of now, you have but one option. You are going to march over to Sweet Apple Acres and ask Big Mac if he would like to go on a date! You fix your mane and spritz some perfume -something which Rarity has always asked when she wanted to match you on a blind date- as you trot toward your front door.

Before opening, you hear a loud banging on the door. Curious, you peek out to see who this unexpected caller is. To your astonishment, you realize it is none other than... Flash Sentry himself! Your first choice! And he's holding flowers while dressed in a faux leather jacket with a stylish chain necklace!

"Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my g-o-o-o-o-osh!" you tap your hooves in place doing your best impression of Rainbow Dash meeting her idol. The colt of your dreams has finally come, for YOU! Just when you were feeling your worst and ready to settle for some simple farmer, Flash has come to sweep you off your hooves! You take a moment to collect yourself and wipe the emotions from your body, like Cadance taught you, and slowly opened the door for the hunky dreamcolt.

"Hey there," he says, "in all the time since I've first set eyes on you, I've done nothing but count the days until I can see you again and properly ask you out. And now, I can wait no longer".

Your heart melts as you swoon. The perfect colt has come and he wants to be the perfect coltfriend...your perfect coltfriend. You are powerless and completely at his mercy, right where you dreamed of being.

You are Flash Sentry...again

"Hey there, in all the time since I've first set eyes on you, I've done nothing but count the days until I can see you again and properly ask you out. And now, I can wait no longer."

Perfect. You see the Alicorn Princess flush and completely swoon over in response to your line. You've put in a lot of practice with a LOT of fillies and mares to get this moment right and now it has finally paid off. Your approach has improved since you began with the original "bumping into each other" line. Numerous ponies have thrown themselves at your hooves and many relationships have ended due to your exploits, but you don't care. You got what you wanted; you usually get what you want. Sure, there have been a few bumps in the road, a few failures, a few murderous exes, but you always manage to come out on top.

Now, the Princess of Friendship herself is completely at your mercy, and she WANTS to be there. You look at the lavender Alicorn on the floor ready to submit to your will, but you realize that with her this will require gentleness and false humility. You step in to help her up.

"My Princess," you say, "are you alright? I want nothing more than to see you smile, to give you anything you desire, to be the perfect stallion you deserve". Bulls-eye. That should clinch it! Twilight can do nothing but mumble and stutter at your smooth approach.

"Yeah...that is... ma...hmm..." she can't even form coherent words. This is in the bag. You proceed to shut the door to cement your victory. However, she suddenly stops you. "Wait," she says, "not yet! Spike will be back soon!"

Stupid Dragon! you think to yourself. Still, this is a sure thing!

"Very well, my dear!" you reply, "you are the most special pony and definitely worth the wait! Hopefully you won't make me wait too long as I ache for your company! Perhaps later I can just take you out to show you that somepony loves you more than anything!"

You've waited years for this, you can surely wait a little longer. Besides, this one's in the bag. Time to start thinking of your next conquest!