Flash Sentry steals your Waifu!

As Discord, you have seen countless sentient beings from an immeasurable number of dimensions. You've seen cartoon ponies, fighting robots, ninja reptiles, and fluffy bears that live on clouds. You've even seen hairless apes fly through space in crude starships (a personal favorite of yours). But in all your travels, all your adventures, you've never encountered one simple thing: a true friend.

No being has ever tolerated your presence, much less chose to spend time with you. You've spent eons tormenting lesser creatures for your own amusement and lacked any sense of morality. You've even had a son, then passed it off onto one of the aforementioned apes without her consent! You've spent eternity building a reputation; why would anyone WANT to be your friend? That's why it surprised even you when a quiet and humble pony looked past all your faults to show you the magic of friendship. For the first time in your existence, you actually cared for someone.

Fluttershy is the sweetest, most kind pony you have ever met. She has a magic that allows her to befriend even the most vicious of animals. Truly remarkable is the fact that she is a pegasus and not an earth pony, of which such magic is more common. Her soft, melodious voice can calm the savage beast, yet her shyness forces her to cower among society. What courage it must have taken for her to confront and win over the brash and assertive Discord!

It is easy to see why you decided to take the next step and start a relationship, even though you two have seemingly little in common. She likes to help creatures, you like to torment them. She is submissive, you dominate everyone. She is nurturing and responsible, you... well, you don't need to mention your unknown number of offspring again. When two beings are so antithetical, they must be meant for each other; that is the way of discordance.

It is Tuesday, the day you and Fluttershy have tea. You decided to surprise her by moving teatime from her house to having a picnic in the Everfree Forest. She has always been fascinated by the strange and wonderful creatures that call the forest home, yet fear always stopped her from entering, and rightfully so. The Everfree Forest is home to some of the darkest magic and terrible creatures in Equestria, such as Timber Wolves and Cockatrice. However, she now has little to fear with her immortal and all-powerful Discord!

You were looking forward to spending quality time with your favorite companion, until she insisted on bringing along her annoying little pest, Angel Bunny. How could one little rodent cause you so much irritation. You could easily, and on many occasions wanted to dispose of the little furball, but he was Fluttershy's favorite pet and doing so would be the end of your relationship. So, you bite your tongue (literally) and grudgingly bring along the tiny bundle of malice. And so it begins, the ol' Ball & Chain, as you sometimes comment on relationships.

You poof the three of you into a clearing in the middle of the forest that you have scouted earlier. You eagerly unfurl the blanket and, in it, the entire placement for your little picnic. Angel, as he always seems to do, instantly ruins the mood by hopping to the nearest bush and hurling up his breakfast.

"Ha! It seems the little rascal's stomach doesn't agree with teleportation!" you exclaim, pleased with the hairball finally getting his literal comeuppance.

"DISCORD!" Fluttershy quietly shrieks back, "that's not nice! The little guy's just not used to magic!" She picks up the green faced bunny and hugs him. "There there, it will be alright. Why don't you sit down and have some nice, calming tea. I'll even let you have some carrot cookies!"

Angel's disposition miraculously improves as he happily hops back to the blanket and sits next to the large placement that was clearly meant for the giant Draconequus. This forces you to grumble and sneer, knowing any audible discontent will be met with ill-favor by Fluttershy. You are forced to move to the comically small placement, which sits opposite and furthest from your beloved. Angel manages to taunt you by sticking out his tongue, all the while going unnoticed by his caretaker, of course. One day, you think, I'm going to send you to the dimension of famished foxes!

Fluttershy begins pouring tea, of course starting with that infernal rabbit, and starts conversing on matters of little interest to you. She starts by commenting on this dull weather, which is sadly lacking in falling confectioneries. Then she drones on about how her friend Piggy Sty (you can't remember nor care for the pink pony's name at the moment) is traveling across Equestria. You had such high hopes for this picnic only to have it ruined by tedious conversation and, more importantly, unwanted company. You stare at the bunny as he mocks you by visually overindulging in his carrot treats.

" ...And then Pinkie stayed in Appaloosa with Cheese Sandwich," Fluttershy continued telling her story. She turns to you noticing you are not paying attention. "Discord! Have you been listening to a word I said?!"

"Yes, yes..." you reply, trying to steal a cookie from the spoiled rabbit. "Pinkie is in the apple and cheese sandwich. Sounds delicious," your attention still on the treat you just acquired.

"THAT IS NOT WHAT I SAID!" She is now visually upset. One thing you must learn is that in a relationship, you can't just pretend to pay attention. You snap your focus back to Fluttershy at the sound of her discontent, only to have Angel hop over and slap your paw with the back of his spoon as he steals his treat back.

"Why you little..." you pick up the cantankerous coney in an effort to comically strangle it.

"DISCORD!" Fluttershy stops you as you still hold Angel by the neck. You look over only to see her giving you "The Stare". You openly mocked her stare during your reformation, but now it truly is the image that haunts you the most. You slowly put Angel Bunny back down as he swipes his treat and hops back to that big placement with his eyes closed and nose held high. "What do you have to say for yourself!" she scolds as you rub your aching paw.

"He started it!" you point to the naughty rabbit, who now is reclining in the middle of the big plate, once again mocking you as he rubs his belly while indulging in his cookie. You clench your fists and gnash your teeth knowing there is nothing you can do about it. Once again, you lost to the bunny.

"He doesn't know any better! He's a pet!" Fluttershy always came to the creature's defense. "You're bigger! You have to be the responsible one!"

Responsible. Yeah, that's the word that describes you. You've imposed yourself and judged other races with only the worst examples of their history, then tried to have them not only destroy themselves but their entire history solely for your own amusement. You haphazardly planted seeds that, in time, grew to magical vines and kidnapped royalty. And then there's those kids you had, a purple pony might even live here in Equestria... No, responsibility does not become Discord. You will get your revenge on that rude rodent.

You try to get through the rest of the picnic by avoiding eye contact with Angel and nodding along to Fluttershy. Toward the end, Fluttershy thinks she heard the call of some rare bird and gets up to investigate, leaving you alone with Angel. With the authority gone, now is the time for vengeful chaos! One of your favorite hobbies is dealing out ironic retribution.

"So, you like eating carrots, do you? Well, how would you like carrots eating YOU!" You snap your fingers as a carrot jumps out of the basket and morphs into an orange, carrot textured serpent. It quickly coils around Angel as he makes an attempt to flee and scream. You press your fingers together in soft, maniacal laughter. The carrot then picks up Angel and proceeds to swallow him head first. While Angel's feet are still flailing about in a vain attempt to escape, Fluttershy arrives back just in time with a blood-curdling scream.

"DISCORD! WHAT IN TARTARUS IS GOING ON HERE?!" She leaps back into the picnic as you return the carrot back to normal with Angel Bunny unharmed. She immediately picks up the petrified rodent and hugs him tighter than she'd ever hugged any creature before. Caught red-clawed, you struggle in vain to explain your actions as she stares daggers through you.

"Heh heh, it's nothing, see. We were just playing, just...pallin' around!" you foolishly lie while trying to fist-bump the crying bunny. The only reaction you get is Fluttershy slapping your paw away with her hoof.

"STOP LYING, DISCORD!" she screams.

"Lying, me?" you attempt to look innocent. "Look, we're practically best buds!" you connect your half of a BFF necklace with the counterpart that magically appeared around Angel's neck. "See?" The completed pendant had the words "Best Budz" and a picture of a smiling Angel with Discord giving a thumbs-up.

"DISCORD, IF YOU CAN'T GET ALONG WITH ANGEL, THEN THIS PICNIC IS OVER!" She started to flutter away with while consoling the terrified bunny. You've finally decided you had enough.

"Get along with him?!" You change to an aggressive tone and posture. "Fluttershy, that rat is easily the most vile, despicable being I have ever come across in any dimension! If you would ever let me have my way, I'd see to it he'd fall in love with a Manticore's uvula! What ever made you fond of that little monster is...is...well, too chaotic, even for ME!"

"Discord, I..." she softly tries to calm you, but you are well beyond your limit.

"QUIET, YOU!" You snap as she cowers back. "FOR ONCE I"M GOING TO DO WHAT I WANT! I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE, AND IF I GET BACK, THAT RODENT BETTER BE GONE!" You spin around and quickly disappear, leaving the startled bunny alone with his sobbing owner.

Fluttershy stood alone with her pet, unable to control the torrent of her own tears. She had not yet realized the severity of her situation. After a few moments, she finally heard a twig snap off in the distance. Only then did she realize the predicament in which you have left her: she was all alone, defenseless in the heart of the Everfree Forest! Her sadness now found itself accompanied by fear as she slowly started to inch backward, away from the noise.

"Discord...?"

She thought she heard steps, and they were getting louder.

"Discoooord...?"

The bushes in front of her started to rustle from movement.

"DISCORD, HELP!"

She dropped to the ground, frozen in fear and praying her protector would return to save the day. Alas, this was not meant to be as the unknown beast leaped out from the bushed and rushed toward her. What appeared was a monster far more terrifying than any she could imagine.

"Are you alright, miss?" the creature asked with a soft, confidence-lacking tone.

Fluttershy tremble as she looked up, confused by the query of this supposed monster. What she saw was a dreamy, orange pegasus with trendy, spikey hair. She identified him as Flash Sentry: Royal Guard and object of affection for her good friend Twilight Sparkle. Relieved she was no longer alone, she accepted the outstretched hoof of her rescuer.

"Y-y-yes, I'm ok. What are you doing here...not that I'm complaining...o-or implying you don't have a right to be here..."  she was surprised to find herself growing shy and flustered in the presence of the overly cute colt. She attempted to hide herself behind her mane as she let out a slight blush.

"I-I was in the area when I heard some yelling," Flash replied, attempting to match Fluttershy's tone. "I was curious to see if anypony or animal needed help. I just love helping the animals..." He looks down and pawed his hoof along the soil in an attempt to appear shy.

"You do...?" Fluttershy peered from behind her mane. This pony was cute, strong, kind, and loved helping animals! If only he wasn't interested in Twilight... she thought before shaming herself, remembering she was already in a relationship with... the draconequus who just abandoned her in the heart of the Everfree Forest! Her anger began to rise again as she conversed with the new arrival.

"Oh, that was just me. I was arguing with...well, that's not important now," she didn't want to mention Discord at that time. "Can you help me get back home, please? I-if that's ok with you... I'm afraid we're lost."

"We?" Flash looked at the tiny Angel Bunny. "Oh, what an adorable little guy! Isn't he just the cutest!" He rubbed a hoof under the bottom of Angel's chin, much to the rabbit's approval. "Tell you what, I'll help you home if y-you let me buy you a daisy smoothie when we get there... i-if that's ok with you..." he did his best to imitate her shy smile.

Fluttershy seemed to slightly panic. Is he asking me out? What about Twilight? What about Discord? Her thoughts were racing, leaving her speechless and breathing heavily. Flash observed her panic.

"O-of course, if you don't want to..." he acted forlorn and disappointed.

"NO!" Fluttershy surprised herself. "I mean...no. It's ok. But what about Twilight? I thought you and her were..."

Flash made his best impression to appear heartbroken. "She... wouldn't have me. She said I was too quiet and spent too much time caring for the animals. I just..." He started to cry, forcing Fluttershy to step in and console him.

"Ohhh, there there, it's alright!" She brushed his perfectly styled mane with her hoof. "Twilight doesn't know what she is missing; you are truly remarkable and I would love to have a smoothie with you..."

"R-really?" he kept up the pretense of shyness.

"Yes! And when we get back, I'll have a talk with her!"

"NO!" he shrieked, almost breaking character. "I mean...no. I'd much rather just get to know you better without the shame of confronting her again. You know how it is..."

"Awww..." Fluttershy couldn't hide her feelings any longer. She grabbed Flash by the hoof and carried Angel with the other as she let him lead her back to civilization.

What Fluttershy didn't know was that Flash had found the clearing you had made for the picnic, followed you, and observed the altercations between Angel and yourself. Then, seizing the moment, he imitated the perfect bird call to lure Fluttershy away just long enough for you to make your foolish mistake. It was then up to your chaotic nature to play out the events precisely as Flash would have wanted, leaving you out of the picture and Fluttershy alone and afraid.

You had no idea what transpired as you made your way back to the picnic. You blew off just enough steam for you to come back to your senses only to realize you had just left your special somepony alone in the dangerous Everfree Forest! You vowed you'd never leave her alone again and you'd be happy to change and leave chaos behind once and for all. You'll even happily live with that evil, rotten...no, delightfully mischievous little "Angel" Bunny!

You instantly teleport yourself back to the empty picnic. "Fluttershy, I'm sorry. Once again, it was my fault and I..." you look around to find nopony there, only an empty picnic setup.

"Fluttershy...?"