Flash Sentry steals your Waifu!

Rarity...

The name still turns your knees wobbly, your stomach queasy, and your heart racing. Since the first day you accompanied Twilight to meet the purple-maned fashionista, you've dreamed of the day she would finally relent and accept going on a date with you. That day is today! You've grown up around ponies, and most of the other dragons you've met have been crude and selfish, so it only makes sense for you to fall for a beautiful pony.

You could just hear Garble mercilessly taunting you for loving a "cutesy-poo sissy pony!" Fortunately, you are now good friends with the new Dragon Lord, and Ember will happily oblige if you want him to wear a dress and dance for every dragon while singing "I'm a pretty princess!"

Still, it gets you thinking about how a dragon and pony dating would be so...unnatural. How would that work? You are not always going to stay tiny forever. What happens when you grow gargantuan and Rarity remains her current size? What's going to happen when you deicide you want hatchlings; and how is that going to work? Would the hatchlings be pony? Dragon? Some Discord-esque abomination? Would you two even be able to conceive? If you did, how would be their quality of life? Would they be outcasts?

You try not to dwell on these thoughts as you believe love MUST conquer all, even biology. You've been working hard for years collecting gems and doing favors for Rarity, so now she has finally agreed to go on a date with you. It might only be a pity date, but you'll take it! You straighten you red bowtie in the mirror of your room and inspect your attire to make certain everything is perfect.

"Dapper..."

You wink and snap your fingers at yourself, admiring the snazzy image of the tiny dragon in a tuxedo coat complete with tails. You grab your top hat and cane as you strut out to pick up Rarity for your date. On your way out, you see Twilight wandering the halls looking forlorn. You ask if everything is fine, but she mumbles incoherently as she walks away. Whatever it is, you think it can wait as you are already running late. If only you didn't take so long getting ready!

As you walk out into Ponyville, you see Lyra and Bon Bon, Big Mac pulling a wagon, and an unrecognizable orange pegasus facing away from you. However, you still get the strange feeling this pegasus is watching you; waiting for you to leave. No matter, you tip your hat forward and continue strutting your way over to Rarity's boutique as you feel you have more pressing matters than some foolish fanpony wanting to get a view of the Princess of Friendship. The castle is protected by magical enchantments after all...

"You certainly are overdressed," Rarity comments, "and that's coming from ME!" In truth, she is right. Your date is just eating at the local, casual restaurant where the only thing fancy would be the cakes and the snooty waiter with the foreign accent. Your table is even situated outside in the patio section overlooking the street. Still, you wanted to look your absolute best for what could be the night of your life.

"Well, m'lady  deserves only the best from yours truly!" you flourish your top hat as you take a bow. As you extend the arm with your hat, you accidentally hit the snooty waiter in the face.

"Ugh! I'll take zis!" he offers sarcastically as he puts it on the rack. He walks you to your table, nose high in the air, and presents you the menus while you pull out Rarity's chair like the true gentledragon you are. "Zee specials today are Asparagus chau-dare" (chowder),"hay and daisy sandwich, and chocolat cake à l'orange."

"Ooohh-hoo-hoo!" Rarity clapped her hooves in delight with her eyes closed.

"Uh, got anything with gems?" You asked, raising a finger. None of those choices sound particularly appetizing to a growing baby dragon.

The waiter harrumphs in disdain. You decide to settle on the "CHOWDA" as you over-enunciate, and the hay and daisy sandwich, minus the hay and daisy. With the snooty waiter gone, you now have some quality alone time with...Raaarityyy... You decide it's time to finally bear your feelings and express yourself; to lay it all out there on the table.

"Rarity?" you ask.

"Yes, Spikey Wikey?" she returns, calling you by her pet-name for you.

"We've known each other for a while now..." you look down and scratch your head, nerves getting the better of you as you attempt to soldier on, "and I was wondering. I know you agreed to this date as a friendly thanks for the work I do and, I love doing it but, I was wondering if...we could...you know..." this is getting incredibly harder to say with each word! You find yourself stuttering. "I know we're friends, good friends, that's a lovely scarf by the way," you compliment just trying to say ANYTHING.

"Spike!" she interrupts, "Whatever you've got to say, just say it..."

"Okay..." you take a deep breath. It feels that with every breath you have to fight the figurative, and literal, flames coming from your gut. Finally you manage to find the words, "maybe we can be...MORE than friends. We can be-"

"FLASH SENTRY!" Rarity shrieks as she cuts you off. Those weren't the words you had in mind as you glance up only to see her looking past you onto the streets of Ponyville. You turn to find that orange pegasus from before wearing his own tuxedo coat and holding a bouquet of flowers. He has a somber look about him as he drudged through the street just next to the table. He peers up to find the two of you preparing for a nice meal.

"Oh, hello. You're friends of Princess Twilight, right?" he responds with a gloomy demeanor. He trudged up to speak to you even closer.

"Yes we are. Whatever is the matter, dear?" she shows genuine concern for the royal guard.

"It's...nothing. I don't want to interrupt your meal or burden you with my friendship problems," he knew full well THAT would get her attention.

"Nonsense!" Rarity quickly interjects, "there's always time for us to solve a friendship problem. Come now, join us! I won't take 'no' for an answer!" There are times when representing the element of generosity can backfire.

So much for the date! you roll your eyes and tap your claws as Flash pulls up a chair and places it right next to Rarity. He then continues his subtle pouting as Rarity inquires to the meaning of his sullen disposition.

"Now tell us, what's wrong?" she puts a hoof on Flash's shoulder in reassurance.

"It's...Twilight! SHE DOESN'T WANT ME!"

This could not be further from the truth. In actuality, Twilight had just swooned as the colt of her dreams came right up to her door and offered to be her very special somepony. But Flash was on a mission. That mission was to steal every mare and filly he possibly could and the path to Rarity would involve some emotional drama. He cried a little louder and did his best to force a tear.

"I went to her house to respectfully to declare my honorable intentions, and..." he pauses for dramatic effect, "and... SHE WAS WITH ANOTHER PONY!!" His sobs grow even louder as other guests begin to look over.

"THE NERVE!" Rarity sat shocked, her mouth agape as her free hoof tried to cover it. "Do you know whom she was with?!"

"No..." at least this was kind of true. Flash only saw him while waiting for Spike to leave the castle. He didn't really know the stallion he would now throw under the proverbial carriage. "All I know is that he was big, red, and had a halved green apple as a cutie mark!"

Rarity gasped in shock, "BIG MAC! The LOUT! I didn't think he had it in him! Why...why I shall give him a good thrashing of my wrath when I see him next!"

You know that didn't sound right. Big Mac was trotting AWAY from the castle when you saw him, and you would have noticed him if he was in the castle before you left. And then there was Twilight, walking alone in the halls in a sad mood. If her special somepony would be arriving, even one with which she was having an affair, wouldn't she be in a much happier mood? Something didn't add up.

"Wait a minute..." you finally speak up in defense of your good friends.

"HUSH SPIKE!" Rarity quickly chastises you. "Can't you see this tortured soul is in desperate need of sympathy!" With her attention on you, Flash looks up to see if the ploy is working. Satisfied, he grins as he sinks his head back down to continue the performance. Rarity continues to console the cute pegasus with the fashionable spikey hair by wrapping her foreleg around his shoulder, "There there, please continue".

"Well..." Flash proceeded with a forced hiccup in his voice, "I just loved her so much! I couldn't stop thinking about her! I wanted to whisk her away to a life of adventure and romance..."

She already has adventure covered, bub! you think as you sneer cross-armed at this date crasher.

Flash continued with the pity party. "And now my heart is torn asunder into a million irreparable pieces. I have nopony to share my sensitive feelings and vast, hidden fortune. If only I could find somepony who loves commitment and changing me for the better..."

WOW! He's not even trying to be subtle! You finally catch on to his scheme. There's no way Rarity will fall for his-

"Ohhhhh, you poor, sweet, cute colt!" Rarity's reassurance has turned into a full hug.

You sit, mouth agape. How could she fall for this? She's seen nonsense like this before! She's really good at figuring out all the moves, she's even tried many of them. Why is it working now? Is it because he's so cliché-ingly cute? Is that all it takes? Is physical attraction all that matters?

Flash makes his attempt to seal the deal. "I suppose I really need a generous spirit to help console me and my broken heart..."

"Awww..." Rarity grabbed him by the hoof and proceeded to walk away from the restaurant. You now sit there all alone; your date, which you have spent so much time and effort on, has just left with another pony. And it happened RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU! Now it is YOUR heart that has been torn asunder, and this time it's no lie. You want to go straight home and cry into your pillow or, better yet, find comfort in Twilight. That is, if she will even believe you.

Twilight has never had a romantic infatuation, who knows how she will take this, or how she will take the news about Flash? What if Flash was actually telling the truth? You sit there trying to figure out your next move when the waiter returns with your food and forcefully places it on the empty table.

"Ahem...Chau-dare!"