The Rise Of A Square World

by dax388

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Crossover, Human
Length: 54417

Story takes off from the end of the square world

This story takes place after end of the square world so go back and read it first.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-06-06 21:43:16 UTC

Im Back

I floated silently through the void of darkness.  A dream less sleep was the only description of the world around me.  Until a voice called out my name. Troll…  Troll bridge.  The voice rang.  I herd no reaction to the sound nor could I even conceive the notion of self at this point in time.  I had nobody no thoughts or senses to perceive the world around me only black and emptiness fill me but still the voice rang out.

Troll… troll bridge

Though the voice disturbed me from my dreams slumber still no signs of life or consciousness could be found within me.  And yet still the voice rang out.

Troll…

I made no attempt to contact the source of the disturbance nor did I make any attempt to analyze it further.  I simply existed with no purpose is reason or thought.  Finally long last the voice grew impatient.

FUCK this troll wake up dumb ass!!!!  The voice shouted breaking me from sleep as my eyes opened.

Finally at long last thoughts and feelings and senses filed my mind.  I quickly took stock of my surroundings unfortunately though there were none.  Laid before me was not a beautiful landscape or any identifiable object but instead a crisp white floor one you would find in if only the highest class building in the richest community of the world.  And yet this floor stretched on forever in all directions with no walls to be found.

When I looked up I saw close down hanging from woody fence polls this was coming to see in higher class is as they did not like to use torches to like their homes.  However the ceiling cannot be seen in either stretched infinitely high or was beyond my point of view.  In this infant room I quickly had remembered my last thoughts and experiences.  This only led me to voicing a question that most living creatures would not like to ask.

(troll)  am I dead?

Yes the voice replied startling me.

Who are you?  Show yourself I demanded!

Seen as things never really go right in my life as a lately I was expecting some form of a horrible monster or maybe herobrine to show himself and lead me into another fight for my diary life even after my life had expired but this was not the case for in a flash of white light stood before me someone who many thought to belong in legend and had disappeared from your world long ago.

Notch now stood before me and all his Glory.  I quickly fell to my knees in response.  Completely baffled by the site I was unable to articulate any form of a reasonable sentence.

(troll) u… u-m… tr—o…?

(notch)  no no don’t try and speak.  Many people are quite overwhelmed when they see me for the first time I thought your friend Pone was going to soil himself.  Let’s just all take a deep breath in.  The notch then took a deep breath in and let it out slowly and gave a gesture that I should do the same.  After a few breathing exercises he then began to approach me.

(notch)  troll I’ve been watching you.  you made me very proud.  I honestly thought no one could stand up to herobrine.  Good job he said padding me on the back and helping me to my feet.  You know…  You look like you need a drink and I think there are few people would like to see you again.  Notch then snapped his fingers and turned around.  When I followed suit I saw that there is a large building standing in front of us.  I recognized it as one of the more popular bars from my city.  I built it myself in such a familiar sight did calm my nerves.

(troll)  well with all the crazy stuff that happened in my life I guess I do need a drink.  As I walk through the door of the ball or I was met with a sight that filled me with joy.  Pone tank Mr. Brown cannibal brain Buster white wolf mushroom cloud and a few villagers that quite frequently talked to me were in the bar the end from the looks of things they’re all having a good time.

(everyone)  troll!!!  They greeted me.

I wasted no time and threw myself around Pone my best friend who had been taken from me in the worst of circumstances.  As I knocked into the ground he only laughed.

(Pone)  it’s good to see you to troll.  Come on let’s all sit down he said pointing to a boost designed a hold large parties of people.

Once we all were seated I looked around the table and figured I’d get to the point.

(troll) so I’m guessing that we’re all here for reason and not just ‘cause I’m dead right?

To my question notch gave a sigh of disappointment and shook his head up and down.  I’m afraid you’re unsuccessful in your attempt to kill herobrine.  You see I made herobrine to be a leader someone who all heroes can look up to.  I’m afraid in order to ensure he would be this great leader I made sure nothing could kill him except of course me.

(troll)  but I saw him he was so totally dead?  But I jammed a sorted through his chest!  I said in the town reminiscent of a child saying no fair after a board game.

(notch)  yes I know it wasn’t exactly this Mars decision to make herobrine without death.  The please understand herobrine was not always like this.  You see I never fully anticipated what immortality would do to herobrine.  It never negatively affected the gods but then again the gods had very different locations that herobrine.  Whilst me in the gods worked on creating new landscapes and always looking forward into the unknown it was herobrine its job to take care of the mortals.  I never really realized how hard his life must’ve been to hold them also close only to eventually have been taken away and to fight every single day a battle that would never end.

Notch then grew silent and remorseful what he had done.

(troll)  well you’re not she can do whatever you want fix it.

Everyone around me now stared intently somewhat excited by a conversation.

(notch)  I would if I could but I’m afraid herobrine is first task in his rebellion was to immobilize my body without my body I can do anything otherwise I would never allow this to happen.  If you are to have any hope in beating herobrine you must free my body.

I then grew confused what did I have anything to do with it I was dead.  What you mean?  I can do anything I am dead.

Notch then perked up with a smile yes but now that you’re dead my power can fix you once more.  The now don’t think this is a free pass it takes a lot of energy from you to do this without my body.

(troll) do what I asked?  Confused

(notch) tell me have you ever heard that of a RE-spawn?  He asked having side of his nose teasingly.

I then smiled yes yes I have literally work?  Notch only shook his head yes.  Sweet I replied.

(white wolf)  hold up before you go bringing him back to life don’t think we should let no but few things?  White wolf erupted stopping notch from doing anything more.

(notch)  oh yes silly me.  I’m going to juice you up a bit more than most heroes are.  Unfortunately I can give you any of your pony DNA back but what I can do is give you the power to Teleport and the power to craft using obsidian.  O and be sure to grab herobrine sword the next time you see it that thing is dangerous and needs to be destroyed.

Notch then made motions again as if to do something however this time he was interrupted by agreeing creeper.

(Pone) wait!  This is kind of our friend can we give them a good farewell?  Pone asked.

(notch)  well go ahead he said snapping his fingers and making drinks appear in for us all.

(Pone)  now this seems more proper.  a toast to troll bridge he said raising as glass the high up in the air.

Everyone quickly agreed racing of their glass high up into the air.  We all then sent shares climb them together into the big drink.

(notch)  good now that that is out of the way let’s do this RE-spawn he said reaching for me.

(mushroom cloud)  um wait…  She squeaked stopping notch.

(notch)  now what?  Notch asked impatiently.

(mushroom cloud) O um…  The don’t you think we should tell him the plan before sending him back?  I mean he doesn’t know where your body is.

notch then paused actually he said the you’re right that would’ve been a horrible if I’d sent him back too soon.  OK was no troll and you’re not going to like this but here’s a plan.  First I need you to go to the end and media with the resistance.  Trust me that’s the only real safe place to be an stage and assault against whenever fortifications herobrine has laid around my body.  Then you’re going to need to go to the nether and free all the heroes that herobrine has captured their he put some kind of block on to prevent anyone from going in or about that’s why you never connected into another last time you try to go there.  And finally you’ll need to find my body unfortunately it’s not exactly some real like to go…

(troll) well where is it I asked fearing where he could possibly have been when herobrine captured him.

(notch)  unfortunately my body is an MOD lands.  I’ll make sure that every compass you can create points to Ford’s my body and not to reach your own home.

My eyes popped open in my jaw drop down.  M-m-m-  mod lands?  I don’t want to go to the mod lands.

He is about now that I have to explain to you more of my world.  Boy I haven’t done this and longtime.  You see it a mod that is an extremely powerful magic spell trust me there not something you want to dabble in.  but from what I know of them who never casts the mud can lay down a particular set of laws in physics they can create new blocks were even new monsters or animals.  Once the mod is in place it cannot be removed and creator is trapped within the month for all eternity.  Unfortunately this is not always a good thing as mobs are not exactly predictable in their implication in real world quite often heroes I think the model act one way but then we’ll turn around completely and become a nightmare often leading to their death.

We as a society to create monster be illegal and any chunks that are infected by mobs are quarantined immediately.  No one goes in and no one comes out which a surprisingly easy to maintain as most mud lands cannot spawn heroes within them and you cannot only go by venturing in yourself.  All mod items do not work in the outside world only within the space of the mod.

I then dropped my face on the table O man I don’t want to go to the mud lands.  But I could hear white wolf and Pone laughing at my despair.  shut up I snapped it’s not funny!

(white wolf)  no it’s pretty funny and I’ve been to them of lands trust me they suck.

OK I said let’s do this thing.  I then rose from my seat and walked over in front of notch so how’s this RE-spawn thing work.

Notch then smiled as he raised his hand high in the air.  Just…  Like…  This…  The he said clacking me on the forehead and sending me heard on the way from them at what seemed to be impossibly fast speed.  Soon my vision was filled with nothing but bright light and I woke up that lying in my bed steering the ceiling.  Quickly a jump to the floor and inspected myself busy of those alive.

The square legs square hands the square head I was back and did my original skin.  At first the thought of the entire thing being a dream entered my mind but a quick glance around the room prove that it’s not my house at least not my house from the city.  This was my house in pony vill and I made a mad dash to the door to prove my hunch right.  The stomping on the push plate I opened up the door and outside pony vill stood before me.  I was back.

And boy it’s great to be home.

End of chapter one.

My House

Closing the door I then walked back into my home.  Admittedly I was excited to see all my pony friends again but I’m still human and a little paranoid about going out with an empty inventory and no armor or sword.  Quickly walking back into my bedroom I noticed something strange about the place I had placed my crafting table chest and furnace.  There were now signs hanging above them labeling them in explaining their function.

That’s strange I wondered.  I suppose I am dead or was dead and perhaps they converted my house into some form of shrine or something.  Ignoring the signs I attempted to open the chest but found that some pony had sealed shut with some metal bars and a lock.  I was beginning to miss being half pony as the lock did take some time for me to break my bare hands but once it was off I are quickly reached into the chest.  Notch had told me I could now craft using obsidian and I had every intention of using this power.  Quickly I pulled out all the materials I had to work with it weren’t much but it was enough.  One chest plate and one pickax later he I was admiring myself.  I now had an obscene pickax and some kick ass armor.  I had thought to make a soared of found it would be best to just wait for me to find herobrine sword again I can always just ask what the ponies did with it.

I then felt a very familiar feeling the feeling of hunger.  Having just been respond I bet this body has never tasted food before and I was quite eager to appease it.  Unfortunately the chest that I pulled material out of had been emptied of all food.  Had this not been my first time in pony vill I would’ve been confused but I do remember them telling me something about food not lasting forever at least not like in my world so I quickly skipped any muttering to myself in confusion and went downstairs the place where I knew some food would be.

Sliding down the ladder I quickly made my weight to the chicken execution machine.  The machine in question now had a red velvet rope that quarantined it off from the rest of the home.  I had thought about the rope and as to why they would put it here but there’s a more important matter at hand.  I required food and food I shall have.  Reaching over to the machine I pulled the first lever expecting a chicken plopped into the way of the waiting arrows however no such action occurred.

Listening closely to the shoot I found that hand holding all the chickens was now empty.  This was no doubt the work of fluttershy.  She must’ve empty the chicken coop after my death and if she was taking care the chickens now there’s no way I could possibly eat a few.  O blocks I said to myself.  There’s got to be food around here somewhere.  I could hear my stomach gargling demanding a fellow with food immediately.  I protested to this informing it that it was not my fault notch neglected to fill my stomach before responding me but my protests fell on deaf ears as the angry grows continued.

In my hungry state I looked around the home attempting to identify any source of food however my house had been scrubbed completely clean to any edible substance.  Cubes on a stick I swore it looks like I’m going to have to go out to eat.  I knew that my stomach and change back into a human someone be able to eat most of the pony food but they still had plenty of the strange fruits and vegetables that I can try and munch on with no problem.  Well I wouldn’t say no problem as there’s one problem I am not faced in my previous visit to pony vill I had no money.  All the items and materials that were once so abundant around me are now gone.  I never realized just how much junk I always carry with me until I lost it all.

Putting my hands to my mouth I pondered where I can get something to trade for a meal.  I didn’t have any diamonds left.  And the only material in the chest upstairs was for building no pony would you be able to use them.  An idea then popped into my head.  An Ender chest.  I thought myself.

Back in my own world I only ever used ender chests for keeping money in sure to still be full of money now.  You see back when my city was young everything was traded around using emeralds the money of my world but when my chest filled up completely with emeralds I found that having them outside an Ender chest lead to feed is trying to steal them from that point I ordered all currency in my city to be iron and not emeralds.  With no big payoff for thieves in the form of emeralds stored in a wooden chest they left my city alone.

Now I have a need of those emeralds once more so I decided to go back upstairs in craft me an Ender chest.  I can only hope that it would transport the contents through worlds and allow me to grab the money inside.  Walking back upstairs I was met with the sound of my door opening and voices from outside.

Not being able to hear the voices correctly I swiftly snuck upstairs and listened in on what was happening.  Some pony had entered my home and was now talking to another pony slightly outside the door.  Using every bit of stealth I could which was just crouching and hoping no one heard or saw me I listen in on the conversation.

(?)  OK vinyl that’s enough your plan failed just admit it and pay up.  Gray pony said as she barred some pony who I can see from entering.

(vinyl scratch)  oh come on how was I supposed to know they were not going to cover buildings from outside our universe.  I mean why would they even make that a policy?  Oh for get it I have some stuff to do I’ll be back soon.  The mysterious pony said as she left leaving the gray pony to walk further into the home after saying goodbye.

After getting closer I realized the pony was carrying some form of musical instrument.  Allowing my curiosity to properly take hold of me I got closer in the attempt to examine the pony.  The of the new closer inspection I saw that she was carrying a paper bag the contents of which I have no idea the string instrument I previously mentioned and was wearing a white collar with the pink bow tie late opponents front.  The physical description of pony would be gray fur and dark gray hair that can almost be described as black but not quite.  Her eyes were purple from what I can see and read cutie mark looked like a strange musical note that I know I’d seen before but cannot remember where.

It wasn’t this point in time that I allowed my curiosity to venture too far as I was curious as to how the ponies main felt running through my fingers.  You must forgive me for this as whenever I’m around the ponies in my full human form at least I have the strange a sensation to pet them like you would a pet dog.  Anyway with a run of my fingers through her hair she sharply turned to gaze upon me taking a deep breath and screamed…

(?)… GHOST!!!!  She screamed.  Now before my brain are could even process the definition or meaning of the word ghost whether it be the pop culture definition or the correct English definition Octavia had leaped into the air and done what I believe to be called a roundhouse kick.  The now it is at this point in time that I would like to take a brief moment to explain to you the difference between humans leg taking power and a ponies kicking power.

I’d like you to think of one of my kick is a Ping-Pong paddle.  Whilst the ponies kick from the back leg would be more reminiscent of a wrecking ball smashing its way through your home and your neighbor’s home and then going right onto a cherry tree with a never understood carving “best if not intended upon it.”

So needless to say my flailing body was soon splattered against the wall where I slid down before finally falling to the floor.

(troll)  * cough* I’m going to skip the formalities and just ask what are you doing in my house?  * cough* I said attempting to regain my breath but failing miserably before just falling back onto the floor.

The mysterious pony only cocked her head sideways and asked your house?

(troll)  well yes my house I replied I built it and seeing as I’m currently standing in front of you asking what you are doing intruding upon my home I think it would belong to me.

The pony looked even more puzzled.  But your dead she replied.  It was in all the newspapers I even played at your funeral how can you be standing in front of me.

I then realize the implications and decided to explain to her exactly what had happened.  Making sure to end my story with the phrase cute young pony drop kicking my teeth out as wave comforting her and ensuring it wouldn’t happen again.

O thank goodness you’re not a ghost she replied to my story.  I’m terribly sorry Mr. Bridge is it?

(troll)  O please call me troll it’s what I’m comfortable with being called.

(?)  Very well troll my name is Octavia and a few months after your death I purchased the home having been forced into it by my roommate and we attempted to make it a must see stop on any visitor’s list of things to do. However things did not quite work out and we cannot get the house approved as a landmark or even advertised in the proper columns.  Whilst I can understand this is your home you must understand we’ve invested all our money into this rather pour decision…  One might I add that is not mine.  She said gritting her teeth and turning to look at the door.

(Troll)  What exactly are you saying? I asked the

(Octavia)  I’m saying Mr. Troll bridge that you can feel free to stay in MY home if you like.  But make no mistake that it is now my home.

O really I replied?  Though I can appreciate her competence and her territorial nature in safeguarding something she had purchased I’m very chauvinistic and wished to one up her.  That is but to show her that the same arrangement would be made up under my control not hers.  Unfortunately I made the mistake of thinking that enderman Teleporting was the same as pony Teleporting what I’ve previously been using.  In this assumption I was quickly proven incorrect.  You see pony Teleporting is an act of magic while it does cause some small degree of exhaustion most of it is pretty much unexplainable and the user feels nothing.  Enderman however appear to use a different method of Teleporting that would appear to be some form of extension to their own body.

To describe my new Teleporting abilities end to describe the epic failure that was my intent to look bad ass for the gray mare I shall merely described what it felt like to do the simple act of removing myself from in front of the mayor and to put myself behind her.

In order for you to feel the same feeling I felt you require several things.  First you require shrinking machine to turn you into something about the size of whatever your favor piece of currency happens to be.  Then you would need to write a letter to the princess requesting that every time you take a step she jump off a trampoline do three back flips and land upon your body with a force of an asteroid slamming into the ground.  One she distances of up right she would then have to do about 40 ballerinas spins on whatever who’ve happened land upon you before finally resetting for your next step.  That was only the physical exhaustion of the maneuver.

The mental exhaustion would be somewhat like trying to break up an argument between a banana and a coffee cup over which one was closest to a perfect sphere.  Only the have the conversation interrupted by a standup comedian who “never really got his big break”.

The needless to say rather than proving behind her and saying something witty and remarkable I felt the ground as if suffering from brain freeze and severe exhaustion.  Octavia was put off by my display an quickly rushed me to ask what was wrong.

(Octavia)  are you OK?  You just fell all the sudden.

(troll)  I’m fine, I’m fine I just need time to catch my breath.  And I’ve never Teleported in this body before and it takes its toll.

After catching my breath I attempted to stand up again but found that the expenditure of energy coupled with my severe hunger was most displeasing.  Managing to stand up I quickly ask the only question that was of any concern to me.  You have any food?

Yes she said presenting the bag and spelling out its contents of a mix of flowers.  I knew I could not eat the flowers anymore but the fruits and veggies were all mine.  Quickly grasping them I take them quickly.  Well I suppose a more accurate description of my barbaric eating would be something of a sinkhole of gravel engulfing entire village.  If you understand the way gravity works in my world you know how hard it was for me to think that for you so enjoy it.

(Octavia)  hey she protested I just told you we’re tight on cash and now you’re eating all of my groceries!

Now that I was full I could quickly said work of making it right and the same time silencing the pony.  I pet her on the head and moved on to the crafting table.  One eye of Ender and some obsidian later the Ender chest was finished.  Now I will remind you as to the physics of an Ender chest.  You put something in it if only you can take it out but you can take it out from any other Ender chest from anywhere in the world.  The my hopes is that this rule still applies despite being on a different world.

(Octavia)  excuse me she protested a nice looking box is not going to buy as new groceries unless you plan on selling it.

I only laughed as I was finally in the spot where I felt comfortable the source of all information and interest.  Is that egotistical?  Yes’ yes it is.

Finally I put the chest down flipped lit open and reached inside.  The comfort of single my wealth in one place once more relieved me.  Well I would say all my wealth it would take about four of these chests to try and buy at least half of my city.  But seeing is my city is gone you know what I mean.

Pulling out one Emerald I then handed it to Octavia.

Octavia then stared deeply into the stone.  Her eyes sparkled and grew wide with wonder.  She attempted to speak but the noises that came out we’re not much below as any form of language perhaps it was some bird call I couldn’t understand.

(Octavia) what…  What…  What…  What is this?  it’s so???  I don’t know it’s just so amazing.

I smiled know that I could finally feel in charge again.  That is an Emerald I explained.  It is the most valuable and expensive to two mine material in my world.  The in fact it is so rare that it’s only use is currency.

(Octavia)  are you giving this to me?  she asked.

(troll)  yes…  Yes I am.  should cover the food I just and for lack of better term inhaled.  O yes in you can have the house.  I just remember that I a business elsewhere that I must attend to.  So I don’t think I’ll be staying in any in particular home for any particular length of time.

(Octavia)  OK she said still gazing into a new prize.  The

(troll)  O needs come back from time to time to pull more of those caught in the chest but other than that I won’t disturb you.

(Octavia)  you mean you trust me enough to leave your chest in my home and trust that I won’t steal it?

(troll)  O I’m not worried about that it is quite impossible for you to steal anything.  Go ahead and try I said moving aside so she could get the chest.

She then pursued several experiments to try and pull something out of the chest but whenever she did anything she found it empty.

I was going to explained her exactly what the Ender chest did but then I heard a knock at the door.  Was that I asked?

(Octavia )  O that’s just vinyl scratch my roommate the reason I bought this home in the first place.

It was at point in time that I am once again felt the urge to troll after all I am troll bridge.  The sneaking behind or the door opened I waited silently for her to walk through.  As the white unicorn with purple sunglasses walked through i jump out in the attempt to startle her.  The entire time screaming things that a ghost might say the ghostly voice.

(troll)  leave this place or suffer my curse.  I said in a ghostly style as I move mysteriously behind her.

The pony then looked me give only a moment’s hesitation and then simply said…

(vinyl scratch)  sweet our house is haunted.

End of chapter two.

The Prank

sweet our house is haunted the little pony said with a smile.

I stood there for a moment in a menacing position hoping she would react but in the end she only poked me with a hoof and grew very disappointed.

(vinyl)   man your no ghost.  You’re alive that won’t attract any customers.

To her statement the gray pony whose name I learned was Octavia took offense.  Vinyl you’re standing in front of the troll bridge brought back from the dead and you’re still on about this stupid idea of yours that never would’ve worked?

(vinyl)  O I’m not on that idea anymore.  I say we convert this place into a nightclub.  Advertising it as haunted will only help bring in a good crowd.  The pony then jumped up on her two hind legs and started waving her front legs around as if envisioning something.

Imagine it Octavia this place pumping out sound.  We’ll hold crowd of young sexy the stallions and mayors shaking their booties to the beat.  She then began to sing to herself as she shakes your butt back and forth.

(vinyl)  put your ass in the air…  put your ass up in the air.

  Normally it would’ve disturbed me to see a pony behave like vinyl but I’ve done this once before and I’m getting used to them by now.

(troll)  um…  Vinyl is it?  I said beginning to interject however she had completely lost herself In the moment.

(vinyl)  check this out square head I’m the only DJ in equestrian that gives lap dances two.  She then planted both front hooves onto the floor and reversed walked her back ones on to my stomach.  she then repeatedly began shaking her but back and forth displaying for me.

O blocks I thought as I picked up the pony turn her up right and sat her down the floor.  There’s kind of something important we’re talking about I said trying to snap her back into it.  Would you care to participate?  I asked.

(Octavia)  well how come I never thought of that when she’s like this? hmmmm....

the gray mare said the as she joined in sitting next to vinyl.  Vinyl however was only have broken for little moment and seem to still think she was in some nightclub.  Dawwwww I was having fun oh well that go ahead square head and tell me what is going down.

As we tried to explain the entire situation to vinyl scratch including herobrine is not being dead my not being dead and my god needing to be rescued I’d like to take his time to now explain a little something of slightly less significance.

When vinyl started shaking her button from my face the appropriate response I should have had would be arousal in consideration to my recent changes in preference.  Unfortunately notch did not respond me with any pony D.N.A.  This means my body is no longer attracted to ponies a fact I do not know at this time. That will be a real bummer when I find out later on.  Oh well that seems to be life back to the story.

So you see vinyl the fight to save both are worlds from herobrine is not yet over.  I must gather up the other elements of harmony once more and take them back with me to my world I said striking a hero to pose.

To this the outgoing pumped up pony only stand up again and took a similar pose.

(vinyl)  yeah!  And this time we are going with you.  She said as performing when I believe to be some small fighting stance that only ponies could use.

(troll) what? I asked.

The little pony then jumped up onto the crafting table and said if you’re going on some big adventure to a parallel universe where everything is square like you then me and Octavia are coming with you.

(Octavia) hold up Octavia interjected the last time a group of ponies went with troll to his world someone died there’s a lot of crying and morning and now you plan on going with him to that place?  You can go ahead the count me out.

Vinyl then turn and looked at Octavia.  oh come on she begged technically troll came back to life so technically no one got killed.  Not even herobrine.  You have to come with!  The she pleaded even more.

(troll)  excuse me I interjected don’t I get a say in who is coming with me?  I asked.

Vinyl put a hoof to her mouth and thought for a moment.  Nope we’re both coming with few would you like it are not.

Not me Octavia reinforced if you’re going you can leave me out of it.  I was third seat cellist in the royal cantor lot orchestra.  The last time I checked that has nothing to do with fighting.  You maybe have a lot more experience going to those rave of things every night.

Octavia only gave a sigh as vinyl turned towards me.  I’ll wear her down eventually I always do but for now I’d like to get you to know you little bit more.  I’ve read a lot in the news but I’ve never actually done to meet you.  I hear you the like to pull pranks you even once tried to ride the princess.  She said.

I remember that incident I also remember her sit on me not something I want to do again.  Yes little pony I admitted my name is troll for reason I do like pulling pranks.  Of course sometimes they end up getting me up into some crazy dominatrix hoof fetish ponies grips on a train or they end up getting me sat on by the princess…  I then shook a little bit.  Anyway yeah I like pranks.  Just so long as they don’t have too severe consequences.

The little white horse then smiled.  Good because tonight is the big nightmare night festival and you’re going to help me get some payback on one of equestria’s most notorious pranksters.  A little pony named Rainbowdash he said smiling.  The little tiny voices in my head then quickly began talking to me.

(white conscience)  holy Molly I forgot all about the others.  They think we’re dead!

(black conscience)  yes they do this is the perfect opportunity for a good troll.

(white conscience)  no the these are very serious emotions and there are not be toyed with.

(black conscience) that may be true but come on when are we ever going to get this opportunity again?

(vinyl scratch)  I agree with the black conscience its pranking time.

(both white and black conscience)  what the FUCK how did you get in here?

(vinyl)  pinky pie taught me how to break the fifth wall.

(white and black) if do you mean fourth?

(vinyl)  nope not with pinky pie.  Now come on troll let’s do this thing to.

Then it’s decided the small pony rang out breaking my moral dilemma.  Where pranking Rainbowdash!  The little pony shouted.  Hurry troll she said as she began running on back to what was once my room.  We have much to plan and I plan on getting that rainbow-haired show off back.  Eye of course decided to follow the white pony and turn back to see Octavia rolling her eyes as she picked up her musical instrument and began to play.

Soon both I and vinyl had come up with the perfect prank.  Though executing it would be somewhat difficult.  First vinyl and set to work quite quickly with several elements from her makeup bag.

She told me how they use this kind of glow in the glow dark paint all the time and rave parties and it would be perfect for making me look scary.  I assured her that I was quite good pretending to be undead or more like under the control of herobrine as I’ve been fighting them off for quite some time now.

White paper over my eyes and making me look as deceased as possible both I and vinyl then realized a slight problem.  That was that I would attract quite a bit of attention.  However i quickly realized who I am and quickly grabbed the compass and some pieces of paper.  The compass seem to point in all directions I remembered notch telling me something about it leaving me to where I needed to go to save him but that would have to wait for later.  Quickly making a map I saw that all of pony vill was displayed onto it.  OK vinyl I said showing her the map just tell me where to go and I will dig us a little tunnel there.

(vinyl)  O now that is cool I’m so partying with you next time pinky throws one which should be the second she finds out your live.  Anyway night is about foal very soon but I know for fact that Rainbowdash is napping in this tree right here she said pointing a hoof to the piece of paper.  Can you dig fast enough to move their before she wakes up and moves?

I honestly felt somewhat insulted by that little pony. digging as you already know is what my people are best at… well one of the things my people are best at.  don’t you worry I told her will make it their I said pulling out my pickax and pointing to the basement door.  The not only that but this place is going to have a secret passageway all through pony vill up when I’m done.  That last statement vinyl gain quite a bit of excitement and eagerly bounced around me.

It was a little work but fast especially with my new pickax and soon we were directly underneath the place vinyl said Rainbowdash was sleeping.  I was just about to make a passageway up out of the dirt and rock when I heard a voice come from behind us.

(Octavia)  OK vinyl I can already see the damage you are going to cause I might as well be here to be some kind of refereeing to the pandemonium.

Vinyl only smiled as she looked back at me apparently she had been counting on Octavia to eventually catch up with us.

(troll)  well well fancy pony I’m glad to see you join the party.  But make sure you be quiet just above us should be Rainbowdash right little pony I said looking at the small white DJ.

Vinyl then smiled big and bright as she shook her head up and down.  I think so troll she said.

(Octavia)  you know troll when you tried to scare me I am a skate you threw a brick wall how do you think Rainbowdash going to react?  She asked trying to inject some logic into the situation.

I thought about what she said for about ½ second.  She was right this prank was stupid and insensitive and probably would get ma kick through a building.  But let’s face it when you’re offered a chance to prank someone this good are you really going to pass it up?

Using my pickax I dug our way out of the tunnel I’d made and looked up into the tree above us.  i could see the tips of blue wings and one hoof dangling down low enough for me to touch.

(troll)  OK you to I whispered.  Be very quiet I need to think the best way to wake her up.

(vinyl scratch) o…o…  Touch her hoof!  She said excitedly in the gabby Gumms column retraction it explained that

Rainbowdash doesn’t like hooficures because she hates it when ponies touch her hoofs.  Their very sensitive touch one and

she sure to wake up.

As soon as vinyl was done talking Octavia interjected again.  Now you’re just trying to get him hurt.

Though every fiber in my being told me that this is a bad idea I soldiered on.  it was just too good an opportunity to pass up.  Eye motion to make sure the ponies would be quiet putting a finger over my lips.  How they understood this jester is still a mystery to me as they do not have fingers.

Closer and closer i crept reaching out to my target the end and slowly and gently stroking the bottom of her hoof.  As expected she quickly fidgeted and moved around and bring her up out of sleep a night to where she would talk a little bit as she moved.  I did a real quick check to make sure my body paint was properly in place and everything was ready before reaching up in touching her hoof again.

(Rainbowdash) …  O spitfire you’re the only pony I let lick my hooves.  She said in a dreary dream infused state.  I of course cringed a little and decided to go for a more forward approach.

Giving a small pull of Rainbowdash’s leg I freed her from the tree and she now sat in my arms.  The disturbance causing her eyes burst open.  As they did I did my best impression of a mindless zombie control by herobrine.

(troll)  it’s so cold.  Why didn’t you save me Rainbowdash?

A small moment of silence grew over the entire world as she stared at me.  For second I thought she was still asleep I’ve seen people who sleep their eyes open but this fear was quickly dashed “pardon my pun” as the little pony took in a deep breath.

(Rainbowdash) AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAHHHH!

End of chapter three

Ho Im Dumb

(Rainbowdash) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The little pony screamed at the top of her lungs.  In a flash of light known as the rain boom she’s shot straight up word of my arms and into the orange sunset sky.  As I looked up attempting to trace the rainbow in its trajectory I saw it quickly when out of my site.

Wow I thought to myself now that’s a good troll.  I then looked over to vinyl scratch and Octavia.  And this by far superseded the troll performed on Rainbowdash.  For you see the force of the rain boom had quite successfully removed all of the makeup from my body and plastered it perfectly on to Octavia who was not looking happy at all.

(vinyl scratch)  this is the greatest day of my life.   Ha hahahaha the pony giggled as she fell over backwards clutching her stomach.

(troll)  hey who is that good looking fellow I said poking at the makeup and being sure to put on my best troll face.  Now I wish to clarify at this time that I’m well aware Rainbowdash shooting up into the sky whilst under the impression I’m a zombie is not a good thing but hey I never said I was very smart.

(Octavia) stop laughing this instant you two!  You’ve forgotten that Rainbowdash can fly!  if she tells any pony that troll is and undead creature things could get very dangerous.  What if somepony accidentally attack troll!  I swear vinyl you never think before acting and…

I put my finger to the ponies lips to stop her from talking.  don’t worry my new friend this is in the first time a Prank has gotten me into trouble.  I looked around for a brief moment and saw that I was very close to fluttershy is cottage she can fly but not very far and certainly not very fast.

As vinyl finally recovered from her laughter and wiped the tears from her eyes she looked up to me.

(vinyl)  that is it square head you are awesome!  She exclaimed as she got a running jump and did something that should have processed in my mind much differently.

She jumped square into my arms and planted one on me.  That’s right she kissed me square on the lips…  Um…  Well you know what I mean by square right?  Anyway when she did it I only stood there for a second holding her not fully comprehending the number of social problems it would cause.

Well as you can guess my brain had to start working eventually and it happened I remembered the feelings I had while affected by pony DNA and realize what vinyl was doing.  I also realized a certain few phrases I had wrote into my diary and then handed to a particularly good looking…  I mean misled unicorn.

(troll)  ho no I said putting down the little pony.

(Vinyl)  what’s wrong square head?  Never kissed on a first date?

In just the past half second things had went from fun to very complicated a feeling I did not like it all.  So I quickly thought of a lie something to get the ponies away but keep them busy and relieved me from my thoughts at least for the time being.

Look I said Octavia is right.  We can’t have Rainbowdash telling everyone that I’m a monster so here’s the plan.  You go clean up Octavia and I’ll go prank fluttershy real fast.  As soon as undone explaining everything to her she could help me calm down Rainbowdash and then we can prank everyone else in pony vill.  does that sound like fun?

(Vinyl) that sounds like fun Square head! let’s get you cleaned up she said moving towards Octavia.  Of course I must say I think you look rather good like this she said giggling.

(Octavia)  just shut up and help me get clean.

The two ponies walked away leaving me some time to myself.  O man I thought.  I hope twilight did not actually read my diary that will make things a much easier.  I mean I can’t actually love a pony can I?  I had to eventually push these thoughts from my mind as the aspect of Rainbowdash sending the royal guards after me or something did sound pretty foreboding.  They quickly walked along the path to Fluttershy’s cottage.

Thinking was not really something I wanted to do.  You need to understand relations back home are not as complicated than they are here.  Our lives are so short there really is no commitment in them.  But here and pony vill I guess things are different.  O man I thought to myself Fluttershy’s cottages even further way than what I thought.  I wish I had something to distract me.

Now up until now I’ve noticed the universe pretty much enjoys messing with me in any way it can maybe this is to make up for the weary trolls I do to other people but at any rate this one time it decided to give me what I wanted.  I could hear the distinct sound of voices of the head.

One of them I recognized…

(?) You two are just bullies just because your parents have money don’t mean your any better than us.

Listening closer i determined that there were five ponies up a head.  And two sides to the argument.  One side had two ponies who seem to be implying the argument that having money and cutie marks make sure better than everyone else.  Whilst the other side of the argument had three ponies arguing that is who you are as a person or pony in this case but make you the best.

Finally identified the voice I recognized as apple bloom apple jacks little sister I had met her once before and it would appear she shared many of the same honest qualities as apple jack.  The two voices accompanying her I could not recognize.  The one cracked and broke every now and then while the other was reminiscent of that of a chicken though I don’t know how.

Well I thought to myself I suppose clearing things up with apple jack’s little sister can only help the situation should things go wrong.  Besides I need something to think about other than well you know.

Walking slightly off the path and threw some bushes I came across the five ponies or Phillies I should say all gathered up in a circle arguing.  They had not yet put on their costumes as I heard from vinyl that the children would be putting them on later on that night.

Finally making my way up to the five I got a good look at all five of them one was gray and appeared to be somewhat of a slave to an annoying pink one or maybe lackey I should say either way the obvious schoolyard bully scenario bend into my head and I quickly knew what side of the argument to get on.

Looking apple bloom sighed I saw apple bloom accompanied by an orange pony with wings and white pony that reminded me of rarity.

(diamond tiara)  O please what would you blank flanks no.  For all we know your cutie marks are from being homeless or who knows maybe the only thing your good for is unclogging toilets.

The listening into their rather annoying conversation I saw they did not notice me and even though I was standing right in front of them well next to them but you know.  Finally at long last I decided to remain on the situation.

(troll)  excuse me might I add a suggestion?

The five ponies then looked to me in astonishment they all backed away with the exception of apple bloom who is a eyes popped open down jaw drop down.

(apple bloom) * gasped*  troll?!  Is that you?

(troll) yes it is me.  It’s a long story but anyway are these two ponies bothering you?

(apple bloom)  yes this is diamond tiara in silver spoon they keep saying that because they have money and their cutie marks they can do whatever they want.

O really I said moving closer to the little pony.

(diamond tiara)  you’d better watch who you talk to box face my daddy’s is the riches pony in this town and he could have you threw in the Canterlot dungeon!

I only crossed my arms and looked down little pony.  I have friends in high places to.  I believe you know princess CelesteTia?

(silver spoon)  the let’s go diamond you read all the magazines about troll and the princess.  If he can get away with riding who knows what else he can do away with?

(diamond tiara)  please she said rolling her eyes we also read them by now he’s only six years old.  I’m not going to be pushed around by a baby.  Besides it doesn’t matter how well he knows the princess if he hurts any pony he’ll have to pay the consequences.

I thought about what the little pony said for about a second.  Then I thought of something that would be really really funny and I quickly used a cobblestone minded from digging that total to build a three block high wall around them.  I then plopped a torch on the side of it.  I knew no mobs would spawn here in pony vill but what can I say I’m paranoid.

(diamond tiara)  hey lettuce out of here right now or I’ll tell my daddy on you.

(troll)  yes well first you have to get their.  Happy nightmare night I said turning too apple bloom and just ring that she should walk with me.

(scoot)  that was awesome!  You just built a wall around them and it only took you a few seconds.  The little pony said jumping into my face.

(diamond and silver spoon) hey the let us out you can’t keep us in here!  The two pony shouted as we continue to walk away.

(apple bloom) we cant really leave them in their?  It’s not right the little pony said as she walked next to me.

I only sighed I knew these ponies were much nicer than the people back home but sometimes it did work to the disadvantage of the situation.  Don’t worry I said to apple bloom and I’m certain someone come across to help them out if not all come get them later.

I then took some time to briefly explain to all three of them what had happened and that they should keep a lookout for anything dangerous.

(troll) and then I ran into you three I said finish my story being sure to leave out the bit of kissing that happened.  So remember anything goes wrong apple bloom calm down apple jack scoot calm down Rainbowdash and sweetie bell you have rarity.  As for the others I don’t think I’ll be to have a problem I mean twilight pinky pie and fluttershy not exactly anything I cant deal with.

OK the three little pony said as they skipped merrily along to go put on their costumes.  You know it’s funny we’ll really have any holidays back where I live but then again we don’t do a lot of things the ponies do.

My comparison of our two worlds came to an end when I finally stepped in a wooden boards of the small bridge in front of fluttershy is cottage.  I then smiled O this going to be good I thought.  The according to Octavia fluttershy never leaves for cottage during nightmare night.  Of course it’s funny when I first came to pony vill I could’ve swore she said something about looking forward to it.  Oh well I’m sure it doesn’t matter.  I said to myself as I pressed on.

Sneakily I tiptoed about well OK odyssey made to this one acted like an ninja.  oh come on I know she lives of hundreds of noisy animals but who doesn’t want act like a ninja.  Anyway building a small dirt pile straight up in a pillar I then crept outside of fluttershy as window and press might hear to the glass.  She was inside all right but some was in there with her.  Clearing the goop from my ears I pressed my head up the glass with curtains block in my view on the other side in listened.

(nightmare Moon)  yes fluttershy for all other ponies the sun will rise tomorrow but for you I will do everything within my power to make sure the night lasts forever.  The mysterious mayor said as she began laughing.

(fluttershy)  O nightmare Moon you’re too strong for me no one can save me now I have no choice but to give in to your demands.

I couldn’t believe it fluttershy is in danger.  There’s only one logical thing to do!  And that’s Teleport street in there without asking any questions and probably vomit saying as this new Teleport a shun really dose number on my body.

Giving a quick moment to inhale I quickly Teleported inside the room right next to the bed.  And the context of the words quickly clicked in my head.  For you see what I was staring at was no super villain attempting to tactically take out the elements of harmony or anything.  Know what I saw was so much worse.  A giant sized pony about the same size of CelesteTia was on top of fluttershy doing her best to stick her tongue as deep as she couldn’t as fluttershy as mouth and fluttershy only played around pulling at some not even fully tide rope as she smiled and giggled.

(troll)  what the?---* vomit*  I did not manage to complete my sentence as the Teleportation did indeed make me vomit and the sound of the square chunks hitting the floor alerted both ponies to my presence in the room.

For fluttershy look straight up at the vomiting friend thought to be dead and then proceeded to scream grabbing onto the mysterious black mayor for dear life and in doing so revealed that both of them were partaking in a particularly disturbing spell I’d learned existed in clouds dale while modeling with rarity.

(nightmare Moon)  HOW DARE YOU DEFINE OF THE SAINT CUBE IS HOME THE GO ON FILE BEAST!

The booming voice broke every window in the home and did a very good job of plastering me and my previous meal onto the wall.

As I slid down luckily not in the vomit she quickly took the opportunity to stand upon me her giant hooves doing a very good job of pressing me against the floor.

As I looked up I saw a curious fluttershy crawling of the bed and making her way to where I lay have crushed to death on the floor.

(flutter shy)  troll is that you?

Hi Shy

I sat in the quiet room…  well not entirely quiet there were two distinct sounds that could be heard.  One being the sound of a clock ticking through its rotations and the other would be my head bashing its way through its sixth or seventh cobblestone block as I sat on the couch.  O dear Notch I repeated to myself as I placed another block in quickly began turning it into gravel.

Bang*  bang*  bang*

In my company was a small white rabbit.  It was currently protesting the fact that I had accidentally broke fluttershy’s coffee table and sucked it into my inventory.  That also explains why I need to place down cobblestone every now and again.  Now you’re probably wondering why I’m performing this self-hating ritual.

Well I can think of no better way to explain it then a flashback…

You see I had just been stepped on by a very large pony.  At the same time fluttershy’s coming to the realization that I’m still alive.  Now this is where things happen very fast and completely beyond my control.  While the big pony realizes I’m no threat.  Flutter shy realizes that I’m still within the realm of the living.  This causes the giant pony to get off of me but to still stand over top of me.

This is where trouble begins for as she gets off of me I’m forced to breathe deeply in word and sit up.  While I’m sitting up mouth wide open and breathing in fluttershy filled with all kinds of emotions run straight into the back of me in a hug which causes me to lurch forward.  Keep in mind that my mouth is still open.

So you have a mouth wide open troll being pushed forward by an excited fluttershy whilst underneath a giant pony with a spell that I have every intention of destroying from all existence as soon as I get the chance.  Put all those things together and you get a shish kebab.

** end of flashback**

I could hear clopping noises as fluttershy walk down the stairs.  I only placed another block in front of me and began bashing my head on it.

(flutter shy)  O troll I’m so sorry.  I didn’t mean to push you into…  She stopped as I was now looking at her with a bruised forehead.

(troll)  can we please never talk about this ever again.  There’s a lot of things I had to explain to you and it’s going to be a long story.  But for now can we both agree to erase that moment from history?

(flutter shy)  of course troll she said blushing.  But luna really wants to apologize.  You know because she accidentally finished up when you were….

(troll) FLUTTERSHY!  I boomed to my shy and timid friend.  Please no more.

What? Did you say luna?  I asked.  I remember seeing luna once before but she did not look anything like that.  That wasn’t luna.  I remarked.

Flutter shy only looked confused for a second then she realized something and began to explain.  O no you see troll it all started long ago when twilight the first moved here to pony vill …

Flutter shy then explain the story of nightmare Moon and how on nightmare night she came to visit her and they were very good… for lack of a term that I wish to say friends.

Somewhere along the story luna herself had walked down from upstairs and was now sitting next to me.

(luna)  we give our most sincere apologies.  But we must ask how is it that you walk amongst us this nightmare night?

(flutter shy)  yes troll she said gaining a hint of pinky pie in her voice what brought you back why are you hear and are you going to leave us again?

I reassured the little pony by holding her tight in a hug unfortunately luna not knowing how uncomfortable she made me scooped us both up in an even bigger hug which hurt my ribs which had just been crushed.

Well flutter shy I explained as Luna put us both down.  As it would turn out Notch is not only a very real person as some have speculated him not to be in my world.  But he is in need of our help. he respond me so that I could free his physical body and put the entire world back to where it should be.  My intentions are together the elements of harmony and some other ponies who volunteered and take them back to my world to save it from herobrine who by the way is still alive.

Luna then got serious troll she asked are you saying our world could be in danger?  I thought for a few moments and confirmed her that so long as herobrine still lives both are worlds could be in jeopardy.  Luna then quickly rose to her feet or hooves I should say.

(luna)  then we have no time to waste.  You must go gather the other elements as quickly as possible as I will go to cantor lot and tell my sister the news.  you must hurry troll there’s no time to waste.

She then kissed the top of fluttershy’s head and gave me a hug before vanishing away in a puff of magic.  The display was quite spectacular but I had other worries on my mind.  Flutter shy I asked.  Why does that keep happening to me?

Flutter shy only looked confused.  You know I said. On the train, with chrysalis, and with cheerily it always keeps happening to me why?  O and not to mention just now with you in luna?

Flutter shy only looked down and scraped the floor with her hoof.  Well troll she began.  I can’t really pin it all on accidents.  You see when we first dragged you to the hospital every one of the ponies we passed thought you were the cutest thing they’d ever seen you know because your square in you just look so…  Um…  Well anyway if it wasn’t for you holding that sword and armor you probably have all of pony vill following you.  The little pony said blushing and trying to avoid the conversation.

My jaw then dropped of all the things for her to say cute was not one of them I was expecting.  What I asked.  You know. cute it was only your armor and sword that scared us.  But we like your big square head and the funny shape of your body looks so harmless and cute.  So of course you just attract a little bit more attention than a normal pony that’s all.  After you got transformed by pony blood it only made matters worse as we quite enjoyed the new shape even more it made you look rugged and a hero like.  But personally I prefer you being a cute little square guy even though you’re taller than me.  She then gave a small squeaky smile trying to clear the awkward from my face.

So what you’re telling me fluttershy is that to you ponies I actually look good?  I asked as we started to walk out the door.  Will not to make you feel uncomfortable troll but yes you look very um…  Nice.

The information that fluttershy had just relayed to me blew my mind.  As we stepped out the door I was forced to ask.  But you can’t actually be attracted to me right?  I look nothing like you.  Flutter shy seemed confused why does what you look like matter she asked?

I was getting ready to continue the conversation when I heard something familiar in the distance.  The it sounded…  pink.

Flying past trees rocks and over streams of water was a small pink ball of fur.  I dare not measure its speed or a mode of propulsion but I know who it was.  Of course before I managed to do anything that tiny cannonball smashed straight into my chest and began filling my head with words.

(pinky pie)  I knew it! I knew it I knew it I knew it!  My pinky pie sense told me you were.  And then I found those two little nasty Phillies surrounded by walls that only you could’ve made in now I see you right outside of fluttershy’s cottage.  Trolls alive.  Trolls alive!  Trolls alive!  TROLL IS ALIVE!

The pink pony then preceded to bounce up and down on my already injured chest.  Pinky pie I breathed through each bounce.  Please get off of me.  She seemed to ignore my command as then she gripped tightly around my head and began kissing the top of it refusing to let go.

(pinky)  I can’t wait to have a party I don’t know what kind of party it will be there’s never been a back from the dead party.  But it’s going to be the best party ever.  Because trolls back and you will never leave us again.  Right troll?

After a few moments of trying to pull off the pink pony I gave up and just began walking back to where my underground tunnels began.  Flutter shy followed close behind me and pinky pie merely rode on top of my head.  Passing the cobblestone wall I found that pinky had led out the two little ponies I had trapped earlier.

(troll)  so pinky looks like you came to the rescue for those two.  Looks like you are a lot nicer than I am.

She only stared at the wall in confusion.  No troll I did not let them out I told them that if they were going to call me a frosting glazed better brain then they would have to stay in their.  I have no idea who let them out?

After the pink pony told me this I stared at the wall it was much taller than me and would probably need either the latter or wings to get over.  But I dismissed the amount of difficulty in the task suggested and continue walking to where I’d scared Rainbowdash.

So pinky tell me more about this nightmare night what exactly is it for? I asked as the description given to me before did not paint a picture of something to be celebrated but more than feared.  Now when talking to pinky pie it is very important that you do not value any form of historical accuracy for the tale she spun me did not seem to have anything to do the question but for fear of starting her on a new topic I led her to finish her insane story.

(pinky)  and so you see troll that is how pony babies are made.  She said finish in her story.

Flutter shy only rolled her eyes.  Pinky that’s not how you use coconuts at all she began explaining when she was interrupted by the site of pony vill up a head.

(pinky)  O no can you hear all that screaming it sounds like they started without us.  Leave some candy for me!  she shouted to the wind.

I look forward towards the lights of the town and I could hear screaming but it was not the scream of joy and delight. no this sounded different, familiar.  With pinky still attached my head I began running towards the tree where i scared Rainbowdash inside the trench was Octavia and vinyl waving frantically as if terrified by something.

(vinyl)  square head she screamed we have a problem.

I swiftly jumped into the tunnel with the DJ I can tell they’re both being serious.

(Octavia)  chrysalis has come back and I don’t think you did a very good job of turning her good seeing as she is rounding up every pony in the town.

(vinyl)  there are changelings everywhere what do we do?

Great I thought to myself it’s bad enough I have to dell was herobrine but now I have to deal chrysalis again.  Wait do you say the center of town I asked the DJ pony.  She only nodded her head up and down as we both came to the realization that chrysalis is standing right over top of the tunnel I’d just dug.

(vinyl)  O yeah where both thinking the same thing.  She said rubbing her four hooves together.

(pinky) what are you going to do troll?

I only smiled the same thing I do every night pinky stop someone from taking over the world.  I said finally pulling her off my head and seating her to the ground.

Looking up into the sky I could see changeling’s flying overhead if things got ugly I’m not sure of pickax and chest plate would be enough.  Blocks I swore out loud I wish I had more obsidian.

Pinky then perked up.  O here you go troll she said reaching out of the trench and coming back with several blocks in hand or hooves I should say.  I always keep these nearby in case of such emergencies.  I only stared astonished of the little pony.  Pinky how did you get those?  You’re not from my world and how did you get them so…  I was going to continue my rant into pinkies somehow obtaining something that can only be gotten from me or my world but I decided to dismiss it realizing who I would be talking to.

Whenever I said with a passing wave.  Good job I give me the blocks I can make some armor and sword.  Quickly a jump out of the trench and blocked off a piece of a tree having forgotten that these trees fall over I was forced to dodge the following piece of timber before finally jumping back into the trench.  With my new crafting table in hand I quickly sent to work on making all the time needed for my plan to work.

(flutter shy)  wow troll.  That armor that is much scarier than your diamond armor.  She said growing small.

(troll) that may be true but this armor is by far more powerful.  I must remember as soon as I get back to pony vill library to enchant it.

I then looked to the four ponies at my disposal OK I said here’s a plan.  You for go get captured and then go to the center of pony vill with all the others.  I will go through the tunnels and ambush chrysalis.  If all goes according to plan and should be more than a match for the changeling’s in freeing every pony should be a easy task.

(flutter shy)  why do we have to be captured couldn’t we just stay here?

I reassured fluttershy with a pat on top hir head. don’t worry I said chrysalis is evil and she’s probably thought this out.  The first thing shall want to do is find you and the other elements of harmony and keep you all where she can see you.  Hopefully I should get her while she is focused on you six.  Assuming Rainbowdash has reentered the planet’s atmosphere by now.  I said with a laugh.

But few minutes the past after all it did take some time for me to extend the tunnels to exactly the right place but eventually the plan was sent.  Deciding not to hurt any of the changeling’s a change from my sword to my shovel and listened in on the conversation above.

Chrysalis was maniacally speaking down to towards all that was now captured.

(chrysalis)  finally pony vill has fallen and next we shall take over cantor lot.  Soon I will rule all of equestrian and no force can stop me.  She said laughing and the sky.

Down below her were five of the elements of harmony captured.  Twilight disgusted by chrysalis is betrayal was forced to speak up.

(twilight)  chrysalis what are you doing?  I thought you had changed?  They’ve all that time was spent another matter to you at all?

Chrysalis flew down to twilight this being the moment I was waiting for.

(chrysalis)  no twilight sparkle you’re wrong our time together did change a lot.  You helped me discover a new way of harvesting love that does not endanger ponies free will.  You’ve given my people a choice whether not be good or evil and for that I think you.  I however have chosen my path and you shall be my favorite slave.  She said as she walked around twilight who was stuck to the ground by some slime.

(rarity)  what about troll?  He died so that pony and changelings that would be safe.  Doesn’t that matter to you?

Chrysalis then grew frustrated.  of course it matters.  You will see troll sacrificed will not be forgotten or belittle.  But I shall still rule over all of equestrian but thanks to troll with kindness.

(apple jack)  you’ll never get away with this chrysalis someone will stop you.  She then turn towards the changeling next to her.  And you Mr. Are going to have a very long talk with granny Smith whin we get home.  The changeling next apple jack then revealed himself to be a ponyline that is pony that was changed into a changeling.

(apple seedling)  O come on apple jack you put me in a very tight position here.  I’m sorry for betraying my family But the changeling some my family too you know.  Look on the bright side since I’m being put in charge of sweet apple acres I’ll be staying in pony vill fulltime I will have to visit no more he said with a sheep a smile.

Apple jack only frowned and looked away from her cousin.  Cousin she declared I still love you but as soon as I get free I’m gonna give you good thump upside the head!

Pinky pie and fluttershy kept quiet which is amazing considering it was pinky pie in order not to give away my plans.  As chrysalis began pacing around the captured ponies finally my opportunity arose and I took it.  Digging away the block above me I poked my shovel out gave something of thump and then pulled it back in replacing the block.

(chrysalis)  good you’re all hell down firm even though I cannot find Rainbowdash I do not think it will…  : thump:

She then fell on the ground as a mysterious force inflicted pain upon her face.  What was that she questioned and began looking around?

(changeling#1)  which was what my queen?

Chrysalis then turned away dismissing the bizarre circumstance.  Nothing she said anyway my dear friends I think the first thing I’m going to do…  : thump:  my shovel arose from the ground once again that and then quickly pulled back as I replaced the dirt.

What was that she insisted again?  OK everyone stop and look at me.  OK this is weird just wait she said scanning the entire area looking for any horns blowing or some kind of trickery.

(seedling)  my queen I think your victory has gun to your… : thump:

See right there she said pointing her hoof tward’s apple jacks cousin.

(seedling)  OK yep what the hey was that?

Chrysalis then ordered all her changeling to fly to the ground and wait.  Now my subjects does anyone see it?  I think it only… : thump:  by my mercy that hurt she said grasping her nose.  What is going on and she then looked to the five ponies stuck to the ground.  You this is you’re doing she said advancing on twilight sparkle where is Rainbowdash she is the only one not hear and she must be responsible.

(twilight)  I don’t know where she is twilight insisted and even if I did I wouldn’t tell you.  Of course Rainbowdash is the type to do a sneak attack I don’t think she’s behind this.

Chrysalis then stared twilight expectantly waiting for it to come in attack her the however it never came.  Well well twilight I think you are behind… : thump:  … this.  She said with an irritated frown.

Twilight only laughed no I’m really not behind this I have no idea what’s happening but it serves you right.

Chrysalis then got angry yes it may serve me right but you know what I think it serves you!

: thump:  : thump:  this time she fell on her rump grasping her nose.   Ouch what is going on she demanded.

Just below the soil I thought I was going to die from laughter funny thing about laughter the Harter you try and hold in the Harter it struggles to get out and I quite enjoyed myself that is until the piece of resistance came down from the heavens giving you my perfect opportunity.

High above the mayhem of pony vill shot down a crisp white pony completely bleached of all color and pupils dilated with fear.  With a splash she shot into the Ponyville fountain.

Chrysalis accompanied by her guard quickly stormed over.  Rainbowdash she boomed how dare you lay have on me.  For this you will…  She then stopped as she looked into Rainbowdash his eyes and tasted her fear.  O my dear I’m not that mad.  The you do not need to be that frightened come hear my slave lets me comfort you.  She said picking up Rainbowdash.

Rainbowdash was still unaware of her surroundings.  She did not understand what was happening around her for all she could focus on was the fear boiling beneath her.  She could only spit out a very small sound every in now and again.

Tr---oo----lll----------zo---m----b

Twilight rarity apple jack pinky and fluttershy look on in worry.  Chrysalis they demanded what are you doing to her?

Nothing chrysalis insist the pour thing is terrified surely this is not from me as her heart is the most courageous of us all.  She then rocked Rainbowdash back and forth trying to calm her.  please my dear speak what has troubled you so?

(Rainbowdash)  t—r—lll -------zooommb she babbled on squeezing chrysalis tight.

What is she saying seedling asked moving towards his queen.

Chrysalis put her ear as close to Rainbowdash’s mouth as she could.  I think she’s saying… : thump : O WOULD YOU STOP THAT.  Chrysalis screamed grabbing her nose again.

Disturbed by the shovel popping out of the ground Rainbowdash finely screamed out.  Troll is a zombie!

Now that my cover was blown I thought it would be a good time to say hello to chrysalis.  Jumping from the ground I stood in front of the evil queen and said.   Bad bug pony!  I hit her again with a shovel.  This time however it was a much harder thump one that managed to knock her unconscious.

(random changeling)  he has attacked the queen!  Take him down!  The changeling boomed as he took command.

(troll)  blocks…

: notes:

OK I’m not very happy with this chapter but it’s not that big a deal as all the good stuff will be coming when they finally go back to trolls world.

So here’s what I need from you.  In the comments below I need you to choose one of your favorite background ponies and the situation for troll to be involved in because I honestly have no idea where to go next with the story.  I know the destination I just need a little help picking the sighed stops.  So shoot out your favorite background pony or main six pony or bad guy and some form of situation for them to be an.

Please comment it’s the only thing that keeps away the writer’s block.

Teeth

(troll)  Stop hitting yourself.  Stop hitting yourself.  Stop hitting yourself.  Stop hitting yourself.

I now stood over top of a rather handsome copy of myself.  Blow by blow I continued to punch him or her I couldn’t tell in the face.  As I did this I continued chanting stop hitting yourself.  Eventually the copy surrendered and turned back into its changeling form.  Standing up I looked all around at what I’d done the streets were now lined with bruised and slightly injured changeling’s most of which had their horns cut off by my sword.

Stepping away from my final opponent I found it was time to release all the ponies from their imprisonment.  So much for this nightmare night thing I said looking around at all the destroyed decorations.  Pinky how fast do you think you could get this party going again I asked?

Rather than responding like any sensible creature she only Pinkyed her way out of her restraints and whipped out her party cannon.  Come on every pony we’re going to have a trolls alive nightmare night party she said blasting me with confetti.

(troll) Good job pinky you take care of the party while I free every pony and take all these changeling’s to the hospital.

As you can guess the freeing of the ponies was a very emotional moment filled hugging and crying as they came to terms with my not being dead.  But eventually came the moment I both looked forward to and feared seen twilight again.  She was stuck down with a very special slime that seemed to prevent her from using magic.  No other pony was stuck down with this slime it seemed to be exclusive only to her.  She didn’t say a word of first she just kept steering at me in a state of shock and disbelief.

I began preparing myself.  If she had indeed read my diary shall be thinking this is a romantic moment or something along the lines of that and I should allow her to feel happy.  If she has not read my diary she will still be feeling happy and maybe I can push all the things that happened in the past into nothing but memories and not have to deal with any awkward moments.

Twilight I asked are you OK?

(twilight)  troll you’re?  how ?

It’s a long story I said pulling slime off her horn but and legs.  The moment her legs were freed she jumped straight into my arms.  Judging from the kissy face she is making.  She either read my diary or is very happy to see me either way I pulled back attempting not to make contact.  Twilight I screamed we are in public.

I don’t care she declared forcing my arms away with her magic and making menial to the ground as she bombarded my face with what gives a faction.

OK OK twilight I’m happy to see you to I said pushing her back.

(twilight)  but troll how she said pushing past my arms and grabbing hold of me once more.

(troll) it is a long story I said thinking about how many times I’ve said it and I will explain it as soon as we get chrysalis over there and all the other changeling’s to the hospital I then jester towards chrysalis but found that despite her being unconscious rarity was interrogating her.  Not surprisingly she was looking for the cure on how to get the slime out of her hair.

I only laughed as I called off rarity and moved in to pick up the giant bug pony.  Come on you guys I grunted as I strained under the weight of chrysalis.

(rarity)  it’s nice to see you again troll but do you think next time you can come back in time to save my hair.  She said playfully giving me a hug.

As we began carrying chrysalis to the hospital I noticed granny Smith walking by dragging a very unhappy ponyling behind her.

(granny Smith)  young man you’re going to get it when we get home you hear me?  You’re going to do all of big Macs chores then you’re going to do all apple jacks and apple blooms.  Then you’re coming back and apologizing to every pony in pony vill.

(seedling)  by grandma it’s not my fault my queen told me to.  He said cowering in fear.

(granny Smith)  if your queen told you to jump off a cliff would you?

(seedling) yes yes I would.  Please granny.  He cried as she dragged him away.

I only giggled at the site and said to myself it’s great to be back in pony vill.  Dragging chrysalis to the hospital was no easy task especially since one of her guards kicked me in the face and now one of my teeth is a little bit loose and it really hurts.

Ouch I said as we flopped chrysalis on to one of the beds.

(rarity) so troll what do you plan on doing with chrysalis now?  The pony asked still attempting to remove slime from her hair.

I thought about the ways chrysalis could aid in our excursion back to my world.  We really didn’t need her but I suppose from a stepped back viewpoint she is technically on the road to becoming a good person even if she did try to take over the place.  After that small train of thought I gave my response.

Rarity I believe chrysalis is still of use to us besides without her I don’t think you’ll ever get the slime out of your hair.  Rarity seemed reassured however the other ponies were not so thrilled with my decision.

(apple jack)  she will probably just betray us again troll why do you trust her at all?

She did raise a strong argument and it did force me to think for a moment.  Well apple jack I said rubbing my swore tooth if you were shown a vision of the future one in which chrysalis is evil and the other are chrysalis a good would you not try to make every effort to make the best possible outcome come true?

Though I have not seen any such for telling I will still jump on every opportunity to do the right thing and seeing as that both of our worlds are in danger once more this seems like the perfect opportunity.

Just then chrysalis began to stir in her bed.  Her big bug eyes began to open as she sat up.

(chrysalis)  what happened she asked grabbing her head.  She then looked all around the hospital was beginning to fill with changeling after changeling badly injured or just unconscious.

(troll)  see chrysalis this is what happens when you don’t listen to me now no more being evil got it?

Troll?  She asked unsure of who I was.  But you?  Is this what you look like before you came to our world?  And how did he survive she said poking me with one of her back legs that lay sprawled out on the bed.

OK I said with a sigh looks like its story time again. Every pony gather round.  I’m seriously getting tired of telling people this story.  Don’t get me wrong it’s a remarkable story. It’s got a good strong plot.   it even has one of the best main characters with the most interesting background he is some guy you can really get behind but even with a main character who gets up every morning and urinates excellence I still get tired of telling it every single time.

And so after that I popped out of the ground and hit you in the face with a shovel which I will not be apologizing for as that was your entire fault.  I said flatly now is everyone on the same page?  I asked finally able to relax and rub my painful tooth.  Ouch I said this thing just hurts more and more.

Just then a parade of what appeared to be three different types of royal guard marched into the room.  Some were shining in golden like the ones that protect the princess.  Others were dark and shadowy I seem to recall these ones having the duties of princess luna.  The third type of guard I had no idea what was going on a scene to sparkle and had a serious thing was straight lines.  They also appeared to have quite a few crystals on them.

(nameless guard)  all hail princess Celestia princess of the sun princess luna princess of the Moon , and princess cadence queen of the crystal ponies.

After the announcement the three winged unicorns stepped into the room.  Troll!  Two of them shouted before tackling me to the ground.  As much as I enjoyed the hug their beginning to cut off my supply of oxygen and I hear you need that stuff to continue surviving so I push them both away.

(twilight)  cadence she declared jumping up to the pink pony.  Sunshine and sunshine…

As they said their hellos I stood up to look at the princess.  Hello Celestia how have you been dead since I you know died.  To my remark she only burst into tears and scooped me up.

(Celestia)  in my life I’ve been forced to watch hundreds of my beloved ponies leave never to return or still worse to return inside a wooden box.  Never have I had one that returns from the dead how?

Apparently luna did not do a very good job of filling in every one.  OK I said everybody have a seat.

Just then I was interrupted by a questioning luna.  Why is to the queen of changeling is here?  And why is there so many danger changeling’s all around us?  Telling this story is beginning to get old so of course I grew little cross.  Shut up and sit down!   I boomed.

Now then once upon a time in the magical land of troll city…

One very very very long and annoying story later…

And then I hit her in the face with a shovel.  Ouch!  I said grabbing my tooth.  There is everyone down?  Everybody’s filled in.

Just then spiked walked into the room with Octavia and vinyl.  Wow you’re right troll really is back.

HERE WE GO AGAIN!  I shouted.  Spike sit down I ordered.  Once upon a time.

(twilight)  that’s OK troll.  We can fill an him in on everything for you.

(Troll) O notch thank you twilight.  But I said grabbing my tooth again.  So princess now that I have been explained everything how long before I end the elements of harmony can leave?  Ouch.

The princess glanced out the window and sighed.  My apologies troll but you’ll not be living soon.  We were forced to close the nether gate when something called a Magna Cuba came through.  It will take us some time to get set back up again.

A magma cubes I question that’s funny I thought notch said the nether was sealed off.  Perhaps herobrine no longer has as much power as he once did.  Either way you’re probably right to destroy it.  Say what did you do with that may make you anyway?

(fluttershy)  O um…  He’s really not that bad.  A stern talking was all he needed and now he’s a well behaved little mob.

I then turn courts fluttershy.  You have it?  Where?  Flutter shy then reluctantly produced a small insulated metal box in which the magma cubes bounced happily around.  O fluttershy I thought only you can show kindness to such low some creatures.

(flutter shy)  you’re not going to take away our you troll?   She asked opening up the box and giving the queue a small quick pet.

Don’t worry flutter shy I assured her so long as the cube is not dangerous you can keep it.  Of course I will need a few eggs back.  I saw that you emptied my hen house while I was away.  Fluttershy then blushed as she smiled.

So I guess since there is nothing to do until the nether gate opens again what now?  I asked the princess.

(princess Celestia)  well troll I can’t stay long I only stop by to confirm you are indeed alive.  I did not plan on the hole chrysalis thing but you seem to have taken care of it and all the her care within your hands.  She then looked closely at my mouth.  Stung by the dentist next time you get a chance.  I must go outside and ensure all is well in pony vill after chrysalis’s failed invasion.

(cadence)  O I can’t believe that little babies back she said wrapping herself around me.

Hey I protested I don’t have any of your DNA inside me anymore you can no longer make the family claim.  I said pulling out of the hug.  In response to my argument she poked my nose.  In case you haven’t noticed she began I am now a queen I believe I can adopt whenever I wish even if they are from another world she said giving me a pat on top the head.

O yeah I said scratching the side of my head and playing with my aching tooth.  When did the whole princess thing happen?  I asked observing her shiny platoon of guards.

(cadence ) Well troll much has changed in the year you were gone but do not fear by your back now and that’s all that matters.  Now if you’ll excuse me I must get back to the crystal empire I’ll be sure to come visit very soon.

As cadence departed luna said a quick farewell which I believe was aimed more at fluttershy then myself and then she quickly walked out the door.

As they left I looked around the room there were several beds now filled with multiple changeling.  There was chrysalis’s bed of course occupied by chrysalis and then there were the group of ponies gathered in the room.  Each and every one of them stared at me expectantly.  Sure was back from the dead but this gaze seemed piercing.  It was at this point in time and began counting the ponies present.  Pinky was outside tending to the party all of equestrian royalty was either fast asleep or had left twilight rarity and apple jack stood silently steering at me fluttershy vinyl and Octavia seem to be trying not to look suspicious.  And get it what was missing?

Then I felt a small tapping on my shoulder turning my head my vision was filled with green.  I saw two black eyes and a black frowned mouth.

(Rainbowdash)  ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Notch cubes blocks and a mine cart.  I screamed as I reeled back from a floating vision of a creeper.  It was Rainbowdash she had somehow snuck out of my view during all the commotion and seek revenge in the form of a piece of cardboard and some magic marker.

Of course I was no longer standing up I was firmly placed on the ground upside down on the opposite side of the room.  Notch damn it Rainbowdash what was that for?  O wait I remember.  I turned you black and white and sent you a journey through the stars.

(Rainbowdash)  yes and I believe that was suitable punishment.  She said holding me up.

It wasn’t this point in time a pony by the name nursery heart happily escorted are allowed game ponies and square dude out of the building as she had no time for rambunctious visitors.

Ouch I said grabbing my tooth again.  What was it some pony said about dentist?  Is that something that fixes teeth?

(twilight)  well yes troll haven’t you been to a dentist before?

I shook my head no response.  What is a contest I asked is it a type of potion to fix teeth?

(Octavia)  no silly a dentist is a professional doctor who only does teeth.  Come on I had my check up yesterday is why should be safe to take you in to see her.  Does any pony else want to come with?  Octavia asked just ring to every pony.

Within seconds every single one of my so called friends vanished into thin air.  No goodbye see you tomorrow no saying I’ve got something more important to do they just ran for it.

OK what was that about I asked Octavia?

(Octavia)  well she said our dentist is a little aggressive when it comes to everyone showing up on time for their dental appointment.  I imagine they do not wish to get anywhere near the building until they absolutely have to.  But that’s what they get for allowing cavities to form.

What’s a cavity I asked?

Now for your sake all spare the conversation eye and Octavia had on the way to the so called dentist.  Instead I will merely explain to you why the prospect of a dentist confuses me.  You see I am square my teeth are square and neither of them have any imperfections ever.  It doesn’t matter what I eat how often I brush or if I ever floss.  Anything that happens to my body will repair itself with time.  In the case of my messed up tooth the preferred method of treatment is just to pull it out and let a new one grill in.  However I do not have any string or an iron golem to do that with.

So OK let’s see this dentist person or pony.

As we walked through pony vill I wave to several ponies passing by.  It would seem pinky manage to get the entire nightmare night back on track and judging from the fact I have not seen her while is probably going to plant some form of surprise party for me as soon as this night is over.

Here we are back Octavia said as she led me to the front door of strange building it was decorated with pumpkins each and every pumpkin was carved to have the perfect set of teeth like streaming through perfect spaced perfectly shaped teeth.  Aside from the occasional pumpkin with braces these perfect deluded image is scared me more than anything else in this nightmare night festival.

As we walked inside a tiny bell rang declaring our presence.  Octavia a blue mare shouted as she stepped into view.  You’re not supposed to be back here for 30 days are so.  But I can only give you good clean if you like?

No no Colgate Octavia said waving a hoof.  It’s not me who need to check up its my friend here.  The blue pony with a strip of white down her main then proceeded to inspect me.

(Colgate)  hey you are that troll bridge guy.  I’ve heard a lot about you.  Of course the things I heard said you were dead.

It’s a long story I replied.

(Octavia) well troll I imagine you can find your way without me now I’m going to go enjoy nightmare night.  As Octavia left I found myself along with the tooth cleaning pony.

(Colgate)  OK then Mr. Troll bridge please come write this way.  The chair she had me sit in was of course designed for ponies so I was not at all comfortable in it.  I looked around at all the strange tools lights and other equipment she had.

(troll)  so I said beginning conversation.  I’m going to guess you ponies do things differently with your teeth right?

(Colgate)  well I don’t really know if this were to happen back home how would you take care of it?

Well Miss Colgate a tooth knocked out of place will continue to hurt until is knocked back in place or is pulled out and allowed the new truth to grow.  Usually we just tie some string to the leg of an iron golem and then the other end to the troubling tooth.  After that we just wait for the iron golem to get excited.

To this cold he seems somewhat offended.  That’s barbaric she said arranging several instruments onto a train next to me.  She then seemed puzzled.  Wait do you say your taste grow back after you pull them?

Why yes don’t yours?

(Colgate)  well we can pull our baby teeth but after that your adult teeth are all you have unless you’re like the princess.  I suppose if your teeth just grow back then there would be no need for dentists where you live.

So I questioned how exactly does this work.  You’re not going to use all of these tools are you?

(Colgate)  no of course not.  But I do like to be prepared in case something more to go wrong.  Sometimes a routine checkup can become so much more.  All this stuff is just in case I run into any problems.  Now open wide.  She said floating a small stake with a reflective surface on it.

As I open my mouth she gasped and several of the tools she had picked up dropped the ground.  I grew very concerned seeing as it was her job to take care of teeth I imagine she must’ve saw something truly horrific.  What’s wrong I asked hastily?

Nothing cold he replied.  Absolutely nothing.  Your teeth are perfect.  It was at this point in time a little thing called personal space decided to get up and go out for coffee as two hooves then barged their way into my mouth.

(Colgate)  their perfect absolutely perfect.  They are perfectly spaced apart with no imperfections or gaps.  The top ones perfectly aligned with the bottoms and each one is sparkling white.  I imagine the purple tongue is normal for you but other than that your teeth are perfect.

She then began touching each tooth which really I expected but it wasn’t so much as an expansion as it was a leisure admiration.  I tried to hold perfectly still live but that quickly became impossible as she began taping on each one.  As for what she was looking for all never know but at any rate she eventually touched the tooth that had been driving me crazy all night.

Ouch I said as she poked the tooth.

(Colgate)  wait a moment this one is just ever so slightly away from the others.  Is this why you came to see me?

Now I’m no expert on the ability to speak but I’m fairly certain you can’t do it while the person you’re speaking to is occupying the space between your tongue and uvula.  But despite this minor inconvenience I did manage to confirm her beliefs.  I only wish she’d give me a warning for what she was about to do next.  For as quick as an arrow flies through air my tooth was ripped from my head.

(troll)  O cubes on a pickax I shrieked as my mouth filled with blood.

Before Colgate’s own eyes a new tooth quickly replaced the missing one.  Finally I said out loud thank you.  Colgate then picked up a cup of strange cold tasting liquid and poured into my mouth.

(Colgate ) swish this around then spit and the sake.

I followed her instructions and when I was done spitting out the blood and whatever it was she poured in my mouth I laid back on the chair and showed her my teeth.

Colgate then took a deep long breath.  Absolutely beautiful she said steering into my mouth.  She then got a bit excited before we finish she said a few last things.  After a while and her mucking about she pulled up a large machine labeled x-ray.  I had no idea what that meant but she seemed quite eager to use it on me.  Without telling me a thing she threw on the strangely heavy cloth over my body and put in something to keep my lips from covering my teeth.

The machine moved about and flashed four or five times after words Colgate quickly jumped over to a strange board on the wall.  I would describe the best as a red stone lamp but on the entire wall.  She was absolutely having a field day I can’t remember being so excited for something since I made my first diamond soared.  Eventually though I realized what that machine did.  Now up on the wall were several pictures of my teeth they are strangely see through and seemed to have some medical importance.

(Colgate)  absolutely perfect she said gazing at the pictures.

Now that I could finally speak I moved up behind her and asked.  So these are pictures of my teeth?

(Colgate)  O yes.  Yes they are.  There was no way you’re leaving here without me taking a few of these.  She said gazing at the photographs.  Well with teeth this perfect looks like your check up is over.  Feel free to come back any time and I do mean any time.  I suppose you want this back she said presenting a small white square tooth.

(troll)  you know I’ve lost a lot of teeth over the years and I can’t seem to remember in those six years me keeping a single one.  Why don’t you keep it?

Upon the completion of my sentence my site was filled with nothing but blue fur as I now had a small pony firmly attached my head kissing the top of it and repeating the same phrase over and over again.

(Colgate) thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you.

Now I don’t know how many thank yous she said after I left but apparently in that dentist’s office on an ordinary day when a square man visited.  Enough gratitude was expressed to tear its way through space and time leaking out onto a world that was only beginning to understand the concept of fire.  Of course with the concept of fire came the concept of cooking and with the concept of cooking came the concept of a housewife.  Those thank yous provided a enough gratitude to motivate the housewives to make the jump from fire two successful space travel without ever uttering the phrase women’s rights.  Of course this had detrimental effects on their society especially once away from the planet women began asking why do I have to do all the work.  But that has nothing to do with our story is just a fun fact I thought you might like to know.

Anyway after leaving the dentist’s office I walked through pony vill back to twilight’s as my home was currently occupied by vinyl and Octavia.  Of course seeing as that house was built for one and I would make three it made no logical sense for me to stay besides it is about time I learned to what extent twilight knew of the feelings I had back when I was affected.

Standing outside the library door I looked up at the tree.  The last friend I had that live in a tree died before my very eyes.  I have no intention of losing twilight as a friend looks like ideas had to hold honesty and understanding will win over the feelings of betrayal she will no doubt have.  OK troll I said to myself here we go.

In Bed

So there I lie eyes wide open not quite able to sleep yet.  Twilight was now fast asleep beside me.  She was curled up tightly between my chest and arm.  She was now wearing a pair of fuzzy pink striped socks as not to force me out of the bed with her cold hooves.  She moaned from time to time and gave me a strong squeeze like a teddy bear or childhood security blanket.

Now before you say anything shut the hell up it’s not what you think.  I had originally come to twilight’s in the hope of securing our friendship and letting her know I was not interested…  Well I wimped out.  Here allow me to explain.

Flashback time.

Knocking on the door to twilight’s I waited for a response.  Quickly the door opened and spike with a bowl of candy popped out.

(spike)  hey troll how was that dentist’s?  There’s no way am getting anywhere near her the last time she tried to pull a tooth.  Spike said with a shiver.

O it was just fine spike she seemed really glad to see my teeth I’m not sure why but anyhow do you and twilight mine if i crash here for the night.  Pony vill sold my house and now I have no place to stay.  I guess I could build a new one…

No no spike insisted.  You can stay here with me and twilight.  Come on in. I’m just giving candy to the children when they walk by.

As I looked past spike into the library I saw that the corner of books I had placed long ago was untouched the center enchantment table still sat there gathering the knowledge from all around.  Remembering that spike had a taste for jewels I thought I’d give him a real treat seeing as it is a holiday.

Spike I said pulling out an Emerald.  Here take this.  I then drop the Emerald in to spikes hands.  The little dragon then gazed into the Emerald his eyes grew wide and he looked at it with such focused hunger.

(spike)  wow troll where did you get this thing?  He asked looking up at me as if I was the provider notch himself.

(troll)  that is called an Emerald and is the form of currency in my world.  Emeralds are very rare you’re much more likely to find diamond then you are to find an Emerald.  I then paused and thought about the time he was almost choked to death on a diamond I’d given him.

I have a sneaking suspicion that the jewels from my world are much stronger than the jewels from your world.  Try to be careful while eating this one.  OK?

Spike then nodded as he began sucking on the Emerald.  His face then lit up and I thought for a moment he was going to faint apparently it was pretty good.  Just then a purple unicorn poked her head from upstairs and shouted down.

Troll?  Is that you down there twilight asked.

Yes twilight it is me I replied stepping into the library.  Twilight then Marilee hopped down the stairs to greet me.

(spike)  troll needs a place to crash four of the night.  Spike said as he enjoyed his treat.

Twilight examined the dragon and remarked on the Emerald I given him.  Troll it is awfully nice of you to give up such valued commodities for spike here.  I will have to repay you someday.

(troll)  O no twilight there is no need for that I am happy to be generous after all isn’t that one of the elements of harmony?

Yes twilight replied that it is rarity’s element.  By the way troll the princess dropped this off for you.  Twilight then presented a necklace with a diamond soared and pickax crossed over an ender pearl upon it.  It was my element of harmony.  The princess asks that you wear this at all times.  Your talent is not like the others.  It is not needed to make the elements of harmony work in fact it can even activate upon its own.  I’ve been studying it a bit and have discovered several things about this element.  Twilight said placing the necklace on me.

It did not quite fit over my armor so I happily tucked it down inside.  Really I replied what did you learn?

(twilight)  well troll the element of sacrifice has several references throughout history.  It is obviously powered by the willingness for one to sacrifice in exchange for the wellbeing of others.  Specifically you sacrificing your own life to protect all of equestrian and according to your diary me.

My eyes then shot open and I looked up to twilight who was now blushing.  You?  Did you read it?

(twilight) well troll you did handed to me in your dying moments that is kind of a big deal.  Before you say anything I don’t want to pressure you into anything.  I’m well aware that you were literally on death’s doorstep when you’re handed me that book.  Twilight said giving spike some form of signal to leave the room.

(troll) so?  Um…  This is kind of awkward.

(twilight)  please troll let me finish.  Now I don’t know if you have expressed these feelings to me if you were not dying and I won’t expect you to do anything because of it.  Basically what I’m trying to say is owl act like it never happened she said levitating down my diary.  That way if you felt comfortable enough you can ask me out if you want.  Who knows maybe I’ll say yes she said with a smile.

(troll)  twilight I said with the frown.  It’s not…  You see…  Twilight do you remember when I changed into half a pony?  I asked holding up my diary.

Yes twilight nodded.

Well things were altered when I was half a pony.  When I was a pony I ate plants and other things I would never eat.  I looked at the world through totally different eyes.  So you know before I would never eaten plans then I did eat plants and now I’ll never eat plants again.

(twilight)  so troll what are you saying?  As she said this her eyes grew big and a little watery.

Now it is in this point in time that my philosophy must be explained for is only now and looking back at this time that I understand what was going on.  Twilight did not care what I was or what I looked like.  In their world there was many different species so of course the occasional cross over was bound to happen.  In my world heroes don’t even reproduce so believe it or not it is actually quite rare for heroes to hook up with any other hero and another species is completely unheard of.

Now as much as I wanted to be out of this awkward relationship thing I couldn’t do it.  I thought about twilight and how she had lost me and I just can’t make her lose me again at least not so soon.  So before a single tear manage to roll down her face I dodged the topic completely.

(troll)  I’m just trying to make sure that you’re OK with me eating meat still?  I said with an unconvincing laughed.

Twilight then perked back up rather quickly.  O I thought you’re saying something else she said as she began walking to the kitchen.  Actually troll I was preparing for any encounters with other meet eating creatures in Equestria. Come here she demanded.

Poking my head into the kitchen I saw she was pulling out something from the refrigerator.  Have a seat she said as she blocked down a big slab of meat.  I gazed into the delicious meat in front of me.  It is sparkled as it looked lean and tender.  But then the thought entered my mind…  Twilight I asked how you procured this slab of meat?

(twilight)  O troll that will be a surprise but taste it and tell me if it’s any good.  she said pushing the peace across the table.

I looked at me now as you know I do not have a very good track record with any unknown encounter in equestrian but what can I say it’s meat how could this possibly go wrong.  Taking a bite out of it my mouth was filled with delight and wonder.  It was true meat glorious meat.

Twilight I asked what kind of meet is this?  It’s absolutely delicious.

(twilight)  I’m glad you think so.  This is Cow meet Betsy from next door was willing to donate.  As she said this I swallowed hard.

What I asked?  You kill the neighbors?  I demanded horrified.

(twilight)  O no she said I only gave her little poke with a needle after that I used a special spell I invented to grow this whole chunk of meet.  I’ve been making meet for some of fluttershys animals and I must say they quite enjoyed it.

Finally there is relief off my mind for second I thought I’d somehow turn twilight into a bloodthirsty maniac…  But wait.  Twilight I asked in my eating your neighbor right now?  Twilight only shrugged her shoulders.

Well technically yes but she’s fine and it’s totally willing so you know.  After this we had a very long discussion as to whether not it was OK for me to be eating the flesh of still living creatures rather than dead.  In the end we decided it was fine just from now on don’t tell me who I’m eating.

Ahhhhhhhh…  Meet I said picking through my teeth.  Well it’s late I need to try and find a bed.

(twilight)  O come sleep with me.  It won’t be the first time you’ve done it and I promise nothing awkward will happen.  She said walking up the stairs.

Eventually I decided it was better to man up then sleep on the floor.  Wait one a moment I said to twilight what about those icicles you call hooves?  At the mention of this rather than becoming sheepish or embarrassed she quickly scampered over to a dresser drawer and pulled out four socks that appear to be made of material unusual in clothing.

(twilight)  here we are twilight said jumping back and front me now wearing socks.  I bought these special after a little chat with…  Twilight then stopped and began thinking or at least I think that’s what she was doing.  Troll these socks are scented is that going to bother you?  She then held up one of her hooves.

Scented I thought to myself why would someone makes ended socks.  Of course then again in my world our socks do not come off and I don’t even wear socks so who am I to ask questions.  I then looked as twilight was still holding out her hoof.  I eventually got the message that she was asking me to smell them and see if they’d be OK to sleep with.  Leaning down and gave a quick sniff.  Now when someone says scented you think of flowers or that snow on a beach or live right after a storm of smells really nice right?

Well the socks were nothing like that.  My mind could not think of a good way to describe the smell that little horrendous piece of clothing was producing so only describe it as yrjchdpoooare.  And before you ask me about the typo no it was really that bad.  I have no clue what the socks were supposed to smell like when she got them but very clearly they had adopted the new smell of …  Well think of stank now through a whole bunch of nasty on top of it and I did a age inside a zombie pig man’s arm pit.

Anyway here’s where things went horribly wrong my conscience kicked in.

(white conscience)  troll don’t you dare make a reaction.  You tell her those socks smell beautiful right now and you do nothing to antagonize her I mean it’s bad enough we have to break up with her eventually. That is if you ever grow the backbone to do it.

(black conscience)  sorry what the smell made me go blind.  Dude normally I’m all for lying but I’d say on this one honesty is the best policy.

Unfortunately this is where I make a crucial mistake.  I went with trying to do what’s right.  I put on my best poker face which really isn’t that good if you’ve ever played me in poker but hoping the ponies hadn’t ever played poker I lied.

(troll)  well twilight that’s the best things I’ve smelled all day.  And I’ve been hanging around pinky pie and she smells like the bakery.  Don’t worry though I’m not going to steal your socks you can just keep them on your site of the bed and I’ll turn the upset direction.

Twilight rather than taking my compliment normally only gasped.  Wow I did not know that about you.  I always thought that was just gossip.

My square eyes then did their best attempt to turn round.  What what gossip?  I asked twilight then displaying for me a magazine on the cover it said “fleur de lis recalls her meeting the famous troll bridge”  I went on to read bits and pieces of the article.  “troll bridge a mysterious square creature that is to believed to be from another dimension.  Supposedly this bizarre life form comes from a world where everything is square.  And as our guest can attest to we do mean everything.”

That horrible pony I said to myself.  Sometimes I wake up at night and put cobblestone in front of the door.  Some say I’m crazy but I know the truth she is still out there waiting watching waltzing and other words that start with W.

(twilight)  she said during your little um…  Encounter she was wearing these socks there purposely designed to make you …  Fragrant using your body’s natural smells.  Or so the package says.  I think that there just awful smelling but if you like them I’ll be sure to wear them as often as I can she says hoping into bed.

I then had a little word with my inner conscience well several words I should say words like kill and strangle.  But of course killing my conscience would be a form of suicide.  Anyway after all that stuff was over I lied awake in bed twilight next to me occasionally she dripped one of her hooves of torts my face and I would have to initiate defensive maneuvers but other than that my thoughts were undisturbed.

Twilight was smart.  She was smart kind caring and she even catered to fetishes that I honestly didn’t have which right now is a bummer but if she was on the right track it would be cool.  I really didn’t know what to think she was literally everything I could ask for.  I mean she could even do magic and for the love of notch she makes meet how many girls do you know that can make meat.  The only down part is that she’s a pony.  I don’t know.  Every time I talk about it to anyone they seem completely confuse that I’m even having this moral dilemma like it shouldn’t matter.

I then began making a list of the differences between us.  She was round while a woman from my world would be square.  She had no breasts well she has them they just were down really low like any woman with that weird grandma skin.  Not a flattering skin to get right after noob-hood.  Then I thought of something I hadn’t discussed before in my mind.  Thinking about the grandma skin made me realize something.  Twilight will age.  My people never age. Our life expectancy is only shore because of the dangers life we live but other than that we live forever.  If I stay in this world with twilight I’ll have to watch her…  The exact same way she had to watch me but for longer much much longer and no matter what I do I wouldn’t be able to stop it.  But if I stay home and surely die with even less time to spare.

I then set up in bed and looked around the room spike said curled up in his bed still holding the Emerald it appeared completely unscathed by his constant attempts to do otherwise to it.  And other than that the room seemed quiet and calm which is not a way to describe my mind.  Stay with twilight and watch her die or go home and be there as I die.  Those were my only options and honestly I couldn’t come up with anything of course it then my thought process was interrupted by a sock reaching up to grant my head.

Twilight then pulled me back down against the bed I think her attempt was to snuggle with me but considering the order from her socks is actually beginning to impair my vision I would call it an assault.  My last thoughts before finally giving up and letting twilight hold me as we slept were simple and elegant.

Blocks……

Moon Troll

I sat alone on a swing set, there was really nothing for me to do that day.  All the ponies were getting ready for their big trip into my world. Flutter shy was off making shore her animals would be fine without her for a while Rainbowdash was making sure the weather patterns would be taking care of without her and so on and so forth.  All I had to entertain me was a pumpkin.  It had been left over from the night before and was a square pumpkin from my world the ponies seemed to really enjoy my pumpkins as they grow with their faces pre carved on them.  I can’t even hang out with chrysalis something about her needing her bed rest after me bashing her face in.

Anyway I sat alone on the swing set outside of the children’s school the children were off today or I should say foals or something.  Normally I would enjoy a long time like this to myself but there’s simply too many thoughts buzzing around my square head.  Blocks I swore to myself I need something to keep me entertained.  However I could find nothing here in equestria there are no mobs to fight or anything big that needs to be built.  Notch I’m bored I said falling back onto the ground.  O please may the heavens send something to entertain me.  For a moment the wind blew past my head as if letting me know my wish was granted and just then a shadow was cast over my eyes.  Who goes there I demand attempting to free myself from the upside down position I’d gotten myself in.

I didn’t make a very good job of it I only got one leg out of the swing set and in the and ended up flat on my head.

(cheerily)  hello troll I heard from above me.

I knew that voice in the last time I heard it well let’s not talk about that but understanding the ponies are well, the ponies I got up and looked to her.

Hello Cheerily how are you?  I asked.

Well troll she replied I’m doing much better now that you took care of all those changelings.  It’s great to see your back I really don’t know how to talk to someone who just died.  Anyway I’d like you to meet my friend.

(troll)  your friend?  I said finally giving up.  Upon rising I was finally able to gaze at the two ponies one was cheerily while the other had blue hair of two different shades and fur is really difficult to describe somewhere between yellow and brown what I think our dots or freckles on her face between her eyes.

Hello she said she seemed a little shy which is understandable considering how unusual it is for them to talk to square people.  My name is Milky Way she finally said extending forth to greet me.

(troll)  hello miss milky way my name is troll bridge.  As I shook her hoof I glanced back to observe her cutie mark.  From what I understand you can learn a lot just from gazing at someone’s cutie mark.

On her flank was some form of milk container next to it was two feathers, it was then things got weird.  For through the bottom corners of my eyes I noticed something.  Something I’d missed from my world.  Something I had every intention of gazing upon once more when I returned …And something that I had no intention or desire to see in this world.

Without thinking I shouted the words.  Without thinking I blurted them out right in front of her.

(troll) BOOBS!

That’s right this pony had a big pair of whether you believe it or not, round of all things, but nonetheless round booms.  At first my thoughts were of disgust I mean round?  Such a bizarre thought I mean round I can’t even begin to imagine what the boys here on this world think.  At any rate I eventually manage to realize I’d said boobs directly in front of the pony who possessed them and was now staring at me.

(troll)  um I mean um….

(milky way)  boobs?  I stared in horror as she continued to say the word to herself.  O she finally exclaimed that’s what you call them on your world I remembered reading something about that.  There been a lot of books on you in the past year most of which were written by twilight sparkle and lyra harp strings.  By boobs do you mean my mammary glands?

It wasn’t this point my brain did the intellectual equivalent of farting.

(milky way)  that’s what you call them right?  She asked I can only respond by the head nod which neither confirmed nor denied her suspicion.  I really wish my brain didn’t have such a long reboot process otherwise I could defend myself for what came next.

(milky way)  anyway I suppose there’s no point in beeting around the bush.  Not too many stallions and this world are comfortable around me and when I was talking to Charlie she mentioned that this was something you like in your world.  So when I was wondering was?...  Would you like to go out some time?

(trolls conscience’s)  what the FUCK?  Quick troll move.  Do something don’t say yes or no.  Just distract them think you idiot move.  Do something.  The voices screamed inside my head.

Reacting as I would deep underground when stumbling upon a monster spanner I reacted quickly.

(troll)  oh my god look at that distraction!  I screamed pointing my finger off into the distance.  As soon as the two ponies looked away I used a Teleport.  Now here’s where things went a little wrong and let me start by explaining so you understand what’s happening.

Back before all this crazy pony stuff began I was a fighter who loved using Ender pearls.  Now using an Ender pearl is very simple as you probably already know you threw it and wherever it breaks is where you go it hurts a little bit to do so but a very experienced person like myself doesn’t care.  Now when I was a pony I just did it know throwing no pain just magic.  And now I do that same process but like an enderman so I’m not quite use to it yet.  What all three of these have in common is that I must designate a point with which to go.  This time I didn’t…

As my consciousness and my body were scattered throughout the space of the ponies I felt a bizarre force pulling on me.  It screeched over and over again with an impossible to describe sound.  even more was pulled until finally with a thud I fell onto a metal grate.  Over top of me I could hear voices but I was unable to move completely paralyzed by the amount of pain I put on myself.

the voices spoke to one another in what seemed to be some form of panic there’s so much noise the banging of metal and that strange screeching noise.

(Doctor)  Derby quick start looking I don’t know what the T.A.R.D.I.S. locked on to but whenever it is she decided to pick it up.  With the end of the sentence the entire room through itself about rolling me around on the great beneath them.

(derby)  Doctor What you mean she picked something up?  and wait why is it a she?

(Doctor)  Well why aren’t you a he?  That’s not important right now!  Whenever she picked up was powerful very powerful and it could have been dangerous.  Now find it look inside every been and peeled every banana solve every rubik’s cube until we find it.

(dinky)  docy…

as I finally managed to roll over believe me a very difficult feat when your square I looked up at the ponies walking above me.  One of them was brown and a boy.  Believe me I’d be happy to finally hang out with a guy for once.  His cutie mark was an hourglass.  The last pony I met with a cutie mark like that said it stood for making a person’s teeth last a very long time and some other health dental based dribble.  Seeing as he’s called Doctor I can only assume he is also a medical professional.

The next pony was a gray Pegasus with blond hair and had the cutie mark of bubbles I have no idea what that could possibly mean but nonetheless she was accompanied by an even smaller pony which she appeared to be a very tiny child.  The child was without a doubt the most adorable little cute unicorn on the planet.  But she was so tiny she was sitting on top of a small cardboard box looking down at me.

(Doctor)  Hurry derby we will be arriving very soon and we must figure out what the TARDIS picked up!

(derby)  I’m looking as fast as I can.  She said emptying a box filled with some of the strangest knickknacks and objects I’ve ever seen.

(Dinky) mommy square…  The little pony said pointing towards me.

(derby)  not now sweetie the Doctor has gotten us into trouble again.  She said glaring at the Doctor.

(Doctor)  That don’t look at me like it’s my fault he said dumping out a box and full of smaller boxes which in turn were filled with even smaller boxes which in turn were filled with tiny ceramic trees.

(dinky)  docy  mommy look square.

(Doctor.)  Easy now dink.  I may be old fashion but I’m not that old fashion.  Kids today so obsessed with the way people look.

Finally the little pony became cross and jumped down from her perch on top of the small cardboard box.  With the two other ponies digging through various containers of all shapes and sizes and pulling out only notch nose what.  She bravely foraged on straight for me.  She walked down a small ramp and slid down a poll before finally jumping on top of me.  She was so small I could barely feel it but I was at long last face to face with a tiny pony.

(dinky)  Mr. Muffin is square man bad?  She then presented forward a very small muffin bed appeared to be made out of cloth as some form of toy.  She then squeaked it several times next to her ear.

(troll)  hello their little thing I said to the small muffin she stuffed up close to my face.  The muffin was about half her size and had noticeable stitching all across it.  She looked rather adorable holding something that was almost the size of her as to where she got it from all never know it seemed to just appear with a flash of her horn which was just a small bump that pokes through her hair.

(dinky)  OK Mr. Muffin square man is good.  She then began exploring around the wide surface that was my chest.  Her hooves clacked and clinked against my armor but eventually she turned around to face me.

(troll)  I don’t suppose you could get the attention of those two?  I said to be displaying the fact that I could not move very well.

The tiny pony smiled as if knowing some form of trick or scheme.  But after words she merely sat down on my chest give a small cough as if to clear her throat and then very softly weekly and almost to the point where it was even quieter than a pin dropping inside the room of noisy engines and shaking boxes she said only one thing.

(dinky)  ouchy…

Everything and I mean everything, the boxes, and the metal the screening of the engines, all stopped as if they were magnetized to my presence both ponies were now looking straight down through the greats directly at me.  The heat from their glaring eyes burned through my armor.

(troll)  thank you miss?

(dinky)  dinky she replied.

Before I knew what was happening the blond pony scooped up the child and the other one was now pointing a strange blue light in my face.  Who are you?  He demanded looking me up and down.

(derpy)  Doctor. I think that’s troll bridge?  She said placing dinky upon her back.

The Doctor Then began examining me top to bottom.  Square head, square legs square arms and I have the sneaking suspicion that the air you breathe a square at least until it comes out?  This is amazing.

(troll) the well thank you and things for picking me up with your what every you call this.

Then the doctors happiness turn to something more of concern for anger.  No he shouted this is not amazing this is bad you don’t exist!  He demanded.

I only stared at him confused.  Well I mean obviously you exist but you’re not supposed to I mean there was one day minding my own business traveling through space and time when suddenly I see you in history books.

(troll)  um OK and?  I said confused trying to ignore the fact he just mentioned time travel.

(Doctor)  Well yes obviously you exist now but before when I went to the future before this happened you didn’t exist you weren’t there.  All the sudden you just appeared written in every history book I could find it was like you’re always there always meant to be.  But before this moment there’s no way to find any trace of you it was like you just appeared.

(troll)  I’m confused I said did I do something wrong?  I asked looking around the room.

(derpy)  O just get used to it he never fully explains anything.

(Doctor.)  I explained everything you just don’t understand it.  You see the all of time is a great big ball of Whitley wobbly time-y wime-y… stuff.

(troll) OK just one for a moment what exactly are you saying?  Explain to me slowly.

(Doctor) ignore all of reality and only focus on my time line there was a point in my life when no matter how far in the future I went or how far in the past there was no physical possibility of us meeting ever.  A one even have mattered I’d come to this exact moment or the exact moment in which you arrived in pony vill you would not have been there.  But one day you just appeared and now when I travel to time you’re mentioned in books and literature and it’s almost impossible to think of but you just appeared.  so basically what I’m saying is you’re not possible.

Of course you guys know not very smart so rather than taking on the subject of how I could not exist and yet still exist I merely nodded my head up and down in order to signify I understood him.  So I asked who exactly are you and where we going and furthermore head I get here.

Just then the doctor perked up well my tardis picked up on some strange energy readings coming from the Moon.  I plan on going there to investigate.  My ship also detected you sending out some strange form of energy and as response picked you up.

Finally it clicked in my head as to what happened.  O I declared you mean this.  Just then I popped from where was standing to right next to Derpy.  That was my teleportation.  When I was Teleporting I forgot to designate a place to go your ship must’ve picked me up in response or something.  Does that sound scientific enough?  I asked.

The Doctor laughed and then approached me.  So then Mr. Troll bridge how exactly did you cross over the dimensions in the first place I’ve been looking into it quite a bit ever since you’ve just appeared so far it does not make any sense as to how you did it.

I paused and thought to myself for a moment.  Let me think I said I just threw an ender pearl like I always do and then it sent me here I guess.

The Doctor then pulled out several instruments and began flashing them all around me.  amazing he remarked a creature from reality so far away from our own that the physical laws of their world are completely different.  I think I know what happened she said picking up two beach balls which had been emptied out of the boxes earlier.  I think of this beach ball like our world and think of this peach bowl as your world he said juggling the two.  Now imagine this there all in a swimming pool and though they can touch a space inside of them can never exchange from one to the other but their free flowing two beach balls can touch one day and then can be on the opposite side of the pool the next.  You somehow define all odds drop that little perl thing in just the right spot to hit our world.  Now normally nothing can survive the water in between the beach balls but you skipped entirely with that pearl thing which is actually quite amazing.  Now are worlds seem to be permanently locked together unable two separate but still Dracula slays separate. Travel between them is difficult but not impossible.

Just then the ship began making a huge amount of noise before finally slamming to a stop.

(dinky)  yeh  Moon.

(troll)  the Moon you say?  Tell me Doctor why were you going to the Moon?  I asked reaching my hand for one of the controls only to have it slapped away by derby.

(the Doctor)  well it’s kind of what we do we just show up in places that seem to be undergoing something strange like…Some groundbreaking research to change the whole of reality or every single pony suddenly buying the same pointless bits of jewelry only to find out they’re part of an interstellar marketing campaign bent on selling the planning cabbage insurance.  One time we even stopped an entire invasion a very small cubes.  No offense.

None taken I said looking at the wooden door with some form of device placed upon it.  Is that the way out?  I asked pointing to the door.

(doctor)  why yes how their lives the Moon control but princess luna and completely untouchable by any other pony except for us he said with a giggle.  He then quickly darted of down a strange hatch and began rummaging around to all the joke.  Now then he declared where are the suits? I know I left them down here.

Suits I thought to myself.  The Moon is a deserted wasteland or at least that’s what I’ve been told why would you need to be formal for it?  Anyway as derby, dinky and the Doctor Began putting on some the funniest looking dress entire I’d ever seen I got curious and decided to walk over to the wooden door which led outside.

As the Doctor and are being were arguing about how big he got in her suit backwards most of the argument consisting of the phrase I just don’t know what went wrong I made my way to placing my hand upon the knob of the door.

OK troll I said to myself to going to be the first hero in outer space.  of course now that I think about it going into outer space is not very impressive especially in the contents of my life thus far but this is still an achievement and I should think of memorable first words to say as I step out onto the Moon.

Let me think I said to myself…  Asked a non what the Moon can do for you ask what you can do for the Moon.  No no I said that will never do.  This is one small step for troll one giant leap for…  Know that’s no good either.

I was in the middle of thought when you’re splitting sound began screaming at me.

(the Doctor)  what are you doing!  He screamed.

Looks like the Doctor wants to be the first out on the Moon I thought.  Well whatever catch phrase comes out of my mouth is the one that’s gonna stick.

I then flung open the doors and jumped out onto the lunar surface.

(troll)  it’s FUCK your shit o’clock I said is I leaped out side.

As the door swung open I was greeted with a sight of the world I’d just been on it was a blue and calm hanging within a black sea of stars.  Rather than immediately falling to the ground as would be the nature of my leap I floated in the air to grab me a strong enough to pull me down.  I had a lot of time to examine the beautiful site before finally I plopped into the lunar dust which covered the sphere.

(derby)  Mr. Troll!  what are you doing you are going to die!  She screamed.

I then realized the as to why they were putting on those silly suits.  There’s no air and space and I was forced to hold my breath.  Of course if you’ve ever visited the underwater cities on my world you know how to quickly craft a door locally I had some would and crafting table on me so quickly I slammed the door on to the lunar surface and stood within its bounds.

Panicked the Doctor read about to inspect me well I wouldn’t say run as due to the nature of the Moon he was forced to bounce.  He seem to be very concerned.

(Doctor)  what are you doing?  You back inside before your head explodes!  His panic however then slowed as he examined the fact that I was now breathing.  What?

(troll)  hello Doctor it’s a nice walk isn’t it.

(doctor)  what?

(troll)  are you just going to keep saying what?

(doctor)  what!

(troll)  you seem to be confused have perhaps I troll you?

(Doctor)  how are you breathing space is a vacuum there is no air.

(troll)  why I put down the door now I can breathe.  The doctor looked confused.

(Doctor) but how did you survive the pressure?  He asked.

I thought about his question for a moment and realize what he was talking about and had to explain that pressure really wasn’t a factor with my people best example is the fact we walk around underwater with no more than doors to protect us.

The Doctor at now standing right next to me within the doors area was examining the air that are something else I really don’t know what he was doing.  It’s not possible he remarked what is stopping the air from just being sucked away?

(troll) Doctor did you ever go to school?  It is physically impossible for two objects to occupy the same space of the same time so long as the door is here space is not.

The Doctor only looked at me as if I told in the sky was purple.  But eventually he only broken laughter O well he declared I’m sure that’s not the only thing that’ll have me in puzzles.

(derpy) doctor the cross eyed pony called out running towards us.  You forgot the machine attract the energy readings.  She declared holding up a small square device with flashing lights all over it.

The gray pony then focused on the little box as he remarked.  Yes well no time for puzzling questions about our friend here.  He said looking at the small machine.  It would appear the strange electrical readings are coming from directly below us.  Now then every one fan out I’m certain we can find some way down look for any kind of switch or secret lever.

I then watch the ponies as they began looking underneath every rock they could find dinky being the most enthusiastic of them began looking underneath small pebbles for some form of one or switch.  I cannot help but sigh at the tiny ponies bonds we going back and forth as she tried the big.  That’s so cute I said to myself.  Then I thought struck me.  I have a pickax.  Wiping out some would I quickly sent to work making a trapdoor and placed it into a whole I dug.

(troll ) Dinky I shouted why don’t you come with me?  I asked poking my head outside the whole.  The tiny pony stopped her digging and saw my plan.

(dinky)  square man is smarter than Docy Mr. Muffin she said two her toy as she jumped into the hole.

once she was inside I began widening the whole I found I did not need to hold my breath as the trap door was more than adequate for keeping up the vacuum of space.  Something unsure twilight would give me a few lumps on the head for as she seems to be rather enthusiastic about keeping the laws of physics unbroken.  dinky I said you can take off your suit now it’s safe.  The little pony complied and quickly tossed off the small amount of glass and fabric which surrounded her.

(dinky) ha ha ha the square man digs wholes very fast.  she said as she gave Mr. Muffin another squeak.

Just then I heard the puzzle voices of the doctor and dirpy.

(the doctor)  oh my troll what have you done now?  he said opening up the trap door and looking inside.

Derpy followed close behind accidentally pushing him into the hole.  Whoops my bed she said picking herself up.  The doctor quickly got up and looked around.  oh my dinky how are you breathing without your suit on?  The doctor said

Simple my dear doctor the hole is being blocked by a trapdoor.  The doctor then looked up and saw the trap door was open.  But the doors open wide as the heir not going out the door if the doors open?  he asked in a very aggressive manner.

(troll)  how many times do i have to explain this doctor two things cannot occupy the same space at once.  The air cannot escape because the door is in the way it doesn’t matter whether not it’s opened or closed.  The as mouth only dropped as he looked to derpy for some support in his argument.  However she offered none.

Well now I said out loud looks like I have a bit of digging to do I’ll get started.  The doctor derby and dinky then stared on in amazement as I quickly formed a spiral staircase leading straight down.  As I did this I sang.

“I’m a troll and I’m digging a hole.

Diggy, diggy, hole.

I’m digging a hole.”

It was not long before dinky jumped down into the hole in order to sing with me the doctor and dirpy following close behind.  I must’ve went down pretty deep as some of ponies that is derby and the doctor got tired after while from walking behind me the whole way.

dinky of course had no such problem as she was quite happy resting on top of my head.  But nonetheless my pickax stopped eventually at a large sheet of solid metal which splayed out in the form of a very thick floor.

Cool I said that if banging against the metal with my hand.  The doctor began examining the floor.  Solid he said this thing is solid metal and is quite thick.  He then licked the surface.

(derby)  doctor!  she shouted don’t just like things that you find on the Moon.  The just as soon as for outburst had begun it was over and she’d given up trying to control the pony.

(doctor)  it would appear there is something inside of this it’s hollow deep within.  Troll he asked can you dig through solid metal?

Of course I can I said making short work and getting a lot of iron from the floor.  Soon we fell smack dab in the middle of some kind of control center.  What appeared to be armored ponies surrounded us.

(dinky)  mommy!

The doctor derby and Dinky all grouped close together as they looked ready for a fight.  Troll the doctor shouted get ready these guys are not friendly.

(troll)  who are they?  I asked looking around at all the armored ponies.

(the doctor)  “Cyber Equine.”

Cyber Ponies

The metallic ponies then surrounded us rather than walking gently like a royal guard might they stomped in military formation.  They did not have any horns to speak of but they did have a strange square pipe formation on top of their heads.  Looking into their dark eyes I was filled with some strange feeling.  Doctor I asked can you please do that thing ware you explain what’s going on?

(doctor)  well troll I would say we’ve just been captured.

(troll)  but these ponies who are they?

(derby)  those are not ponies.  She’s right the Doctor added.

(Doctor)  they haven’t been ponies a long, long time.  Well actually they were ponies to begin life.  There are hundreds of planets in the universe many with pony like life forms.

(troll)  so these things are ponies to?

(doctor)  no not anymore.  I’m afraid progress got to them say hello to pony 2.O an upgrade as they call it.  Ponies with their brains cut out and stuffed into those metal suits.  All a motion removed.

(troll) why would they remove their emotions?  I asked however was then cut off by one of the metal ponies stomping forward and speaking in a strange voice.

(cyber pony)  social contact will cease.  Prepare to be upgraded.

It was very strange if he or she considering the nature of this world simply stared straight forward rather than looking me and the eye.  It’s very difficult to describe to you every one holds himself in a different way some lean back some hunch forward some favor one side but everyone has their own way of moving somewhat like an art form.  But these metal ponies they were standardized boring robotic the most cold and motionless movements possible.

As I glanced over and brown pony who I have come to know as the doctor leaned over and whispered.

(doctor)  because it hurts.  He said before finally standing back in attention.

(cyber pony)  scanning intruders the large metal pony said as he held up his hoof an array of light showered us all.  Scans indicate an enemy is present in the group.  He then paused for a moment hold scans cannot be verified.  Analyzing.

(derpy)  what’s happening the mayor asked?

(Doctor)  like I said these ponies are mostly robotic they can’t figure out whats going on at least not with troll here he then pointed courts me.

What do I have to do with this I asked?  He then pointed back to the group of cyber man who seem to be clattering on about pixels out of alignment or something like that.  It’s you the doctor explained they can’t figure out what you are.  You’re so different their reading as an error rather than something new.  That would be a problem with not having a motion or imagination.  In the face of the unknown they get nothing but a loading screen.

we were then forced to stand there for a few minutes as the large metallic ponies continued their rant.  It was rather annoying constantly they would scream scanning verifying problem not found until finally one in the group lowered itself and ordered the others to stop.

(cyber pony)  error not with a system error with objects take prisoners slash contraband two the cyber council.

It was then that the Doctor Seem to get excited.  The council he repeated I always thought they were in Mith something of legend but it turns out their true OI can’t wait to meet them he said as the group began moving us. The loud sound of their stomping hooves and cold metal frames leading us further down into the facility.

As I looked around at the architecture I saw that everything was quite boring.  Well obviously it’s exciting by boring I mean uniform.  The every door looked like every other door every hallway looked the same there was no distinguishable difference from anything.

As pure walking I moved close to the doctor.  Why are you so excited to meet these things I asked.  You see is normally within my experience that when you’re afraid of something or when something threatens your life as I believe the situation is you do not get excited when meeting that things leader or council as this is.

(Doctor)  Well that’s just it troll.  The council is not the leader of the cyber ponies.  There a outside informant.

I honestly have no idea why the doctor things I understand this stuff but I merely shook my head up and down as if I knew what he was talking about.  The doctor of course catching on that I didn’t understand then proceeded to explain.  The cyber ponies are basically brains stuffed into suits of armor not that brings to most of the processing and thinking there does all regulated by the suits of armor.  That means no free thought no imagination.  Back to the matter is you need that to survive if you cannot wait your enemies will defeat you, the council or cyber ponies with their emotions still kept intact normally this is not allowed however in cases of extreme intelligence they permit it.

I of course then asked why because what else would I do.

He looked around the cyber ponies well and didn’t you see how much trouble they had figuring out what you were a question their judgments so much they couldn’t even tell who I was.  Because the council is not impeded by the cybernetic implants they will be easily able to tell them what’s going on.  Of course I hear that the council has no control over the cyber ponies only an input.

(derby)  Doctor why haven’t they tried to upgrade as yet?  And why are they here I thought you said cyber ponies would have no interest in this planet.

(Doctor)  derby you have once again shown me how brilliant you are if the cyber ponies want this planet it must be for reason why would someone be interested in a planet with no real natural resources useful to them and no gray high population worth upgrading?

Just then a platoon of cyber ponies stopped.  They all then turned to face us.  As I looked around the room or I saw that this room was actually different the walls were just metal they have been painted.  There were five walls between them each a record or one of which we walk through to get into this giant room.  The corridors were then sealed off by a giant metal bulkhead which close behind us.  Looking between each bald head I noticed a slightly less formidable door that was raised off the ground.  The most range feature about these doors was that they were each a different color, ignoring the fact that there’s no way to walk through them and due to their high elevation of course.

Can one was blue the next yellow then there was a red door then green then black.  The arrangement made me think a particular fighter group we had back home there is really no way to describe to you how corny these people were but I’ll admit they made a good team of course they’re probably dead now.

Dinky made her way over to me where she seemed to make adjuster that I pick her up.  After picking up the tiny pony she pointed at my head gear seeming to ask if she could come inside.  Hat hat she said.  What is it a little one I queried?

(derby)  that’s probably a good idea troll will you please keep my daughter safe?  She asked picking up my hat and placing her daughter into a before finally resting atop my head.  Is your armor magical she asked?

Why yes I replied all my armor is extremely impact resist an and shock absorbing and I have a very special thing on my sword that I myself invented I think I’m going to call it… “callback”

Just then one of the cyber ponies rudely interrupted us.

(cyber pony) social contact will stop.  The council will examine the specimens and determine appropriate action.

Just then the doors opened in about came five octagonal balconies age when their matching colors with them was one cyber pony each once again matching colors.  The strange thing about these ponies other than the back door colored whilst all others appear to be uniform was that their eyes seem to leak a black oily substance constantly and their heads when should’ve had some strange bits of pipe attached were instead made of glass with their brains can show through.

(black cyber pony)  we will examine specimens security detail is not required.  He said in a voice that was distinctly different than all the others.

As soon as the room was clear the Doctor tried to speak hello he said I’m the…

(the cyber council)  we know who you are.  You are of the doctor and we must ask for your help.  Now that surprised even me but then again I really don’t know what’s happening so what are you gonna do?

Help you I asked how can he help you and why you need help.  The council seem to stare at me for little while before finally speaking.  The energies that emanate from your body are similar to the ones who are brought us here you will also be part of the solution.

What solution the doctor asked with considerable distrust towards the cyber council.  The glass on top of the council’s heads began to glow for small moment as if they’re communicating with one another and verifying their results for an explanation.  Though we serve the cyber legion we are different.  We have been waiting for a solution that will make all cyber ponies like us.  In this place where slaves and forced to do as the mindless several mention Deans a noble cause.

(Doctor)  well from the looks of things I’d say you disagree and my right in assuming that?

(the cyber council)  yes we have been planning to overthrow the cyber legion.  This would effectively end the unwilling upgrading of all life forms on all planets and return the free will to those it has been stolen from.

The Doctor seem to consider the thought for a second however then he gained a protest.  But not everyone is like you they see what they truly are what the cyber legion has done to them it would kill them.

(cyber council)  no they argued for years we have been secretly improving the design.  Though they do not know it now their bodies will soon be warm once more and able to feel it will be like their old skin the skin that has been stolen.

(troll)  hold up there for a moment of metal heads didn’t you say that the cyber legion regulates everything you do?  So are they listening to us right now?

It was at that point in time the cyber council began what I believe to be called laughter but seeing their perversion was for lack of better term interesting.  However they did go on to say…  Like we said for years we have been influencing them we have a even influence them to ignore all conversation that is not directed cords them by us.  They ignored as emotional unnecessary.  This allows us to talk in complete confidence even when one is in the room.  This deception is to be credited to cyber council red whose origins are of the giraffe scholars of designated planet 2103.

The doctor once again did his happy excited dance type thing as he began discussing the technical implications of an entire system upgrade without any cyber ponies noticing.

During all the technical babble and so called planning I looked up towards dinky who is in my hat for entertainment.  She only poked her head out every now and again one of two look around before finally retreating back into the safety of my helmet.  This of course made me sighed quite frequently I don’t know if you understand how cube is small pony is while trying to be what I would describe to be a ninja.  But at any rate eventually the Doctor council and even derby were now steering at me well ,derpy was half steering at me, as if expecting me to have paid attention.

(troll)  um what I said with a dumbfounded expression and tried to smile and blood off but come to think of it I have no idea what my smiles look like these ponies what with me being square and all.

(doctor) we just told you plan so can you do it?

I stared at the doctor hoping he would give me some sign as to what his plan was however he only glared at me like some form of instructor disappointed by his prodigy.  Oh come on I said how can I listen to something as boring as you guys when I have this to keep me occupied I said pointing to my helmet.

As I did this dinky poked her head out and gave a very spent sneeze so small as if to not even measure on the most delegates of scientific Instruments.  Of course we all sighed.  That’s so cute I added.  So what was it you wanted me to do doctor?  The

(Doctor)  well I suppose this is nothing derpy hasn’t already prepared me for.  Hey!   Derpy shouting in protest.  Troll I need you to somehow distract all the cyber ponies whilst I brilliantly figure out a way to turn them all back into living breathing creatures once more you think you can do that?

I thought for a moment, a distraction. Hmm…  What exactly would that entail?  I asked.

(Cyber councilman yellow)  we will order all forces to ignore the doctor and focus on a single threat can you provide this threat?

Steam boiled gears and axles turned colleagues began to grind and pound a little hamster finally started running on wheel and as old elements of universal aligned I had an idea.  Swiftly and pulled out my pumpkin.  Though show thick is this floor I asked?

The doctor seemed puzzled but the cyber council answered in some units of measure that I did not understand.  Either way I was hopeful that was thick enough for what I had in mind.  Every pony I declared I’d like you to meet a friend of mine.  The iron!  I started as a lifted the pumpkin high in the air.  Golem I finished slamming the pumpkin on to the ground.

Just then derby screamed and the doctor took several steps backwards.  One huge metal arm left itself out of the whole in the floor.  Then another metal arm slightly covered with Vines and flowers lifted its way up.  Grabbing onto the edges of the whole a giant square iron golem arose mighty and strong.

(derpy) doctor what is that thing?  The gray pony asked as she scrambled around the whole to get on the same side as me.

This!  I screamed in some level of excitement is an iron golem he should be more than capable of taking on anything your world has to offer.  Or your Moon in this case.

The iron golem stood motionless at the edge of the whole it had created in the floor it seemed to be doing a quick scan of the room for any mobs after not finding any it turned his attention to the small pony can now protruding from my helmet.  As it began making a motion as if to grab her derpy expressed some concern however her concerns were then eased as the iron golem open up its hand to show a bright red square flower growing out of its hand.

Dinky quickly shot out grab the flower and then retreated back into the safety of my hat.  as she did this I thought occurred to me if I can somehow teach the little one to make bird noises my head could replicate the appearance of something I observed: cuckoo clock.  By far was the most elegant creature I’d ever seen assuming the little bird was indeed alive I really didn’t get that much time to examine it.  After all we were quite busy that day in cantor lot, what with me having been turned into a pony thing.

So I began I believe this guy can provide that distraction we need and seeing as I probably will stop paying attention eventually you need not explain you plenty of his fall behind.  Though I must ask is there any call for me needing my sword or pickax?

The doctor seemed somewhat annoyed by my anything goes attitude in the face of what I am assuming to be a great threat in their world but eventually you should the thoughts from his head and simply instructs me to keep ice or handy should somehow the cyber man realize that the council is attempting to betray them.

(Doctor)  troll is this creature made of solid metal?  he asked giving it a late tap on the leg.

Yes I replied he should be more than capable of taking care of himself.  So how do we start this thing I asked?

(cyber council)  leave that to us we shall declare a full security alert on the creature no cyber pony well if knowledge are presence so long as you do not engage them.

Just then loud sirens began going off I assume that was the security alert the ponies had mentioned.  The just then like clockwork metal ponies began pouring in and surrounding the large golem.

As we began trying to sneak out of the room one of the cyber ponies addressed the cyber council.

(cyber pony)  council explain results and security alert.

(cyber council)  variables are irrelevant this unit is to be detained and upgraded the immediately they ordered just a ring courts the golem.

And as we barely left the room I looked back to see one of the cyber ponies aggravating the column.  Oh boy I said out loud things are about to get very messy.

As we began down the corridors filled with marching cyber ponies we noticed one distinguished noise above everything else.  And that was the sound of the golem now one rampage through the cyber pony base.  Of course but that was not the last we saw him occasionally while the doctor was leading us undoubtedly in circles we would come into a large opening like some form of courtyard in which the golem seem to be having fun tossing cyber ponies around like rag dolls and causing quite a deal of damage to the base.

Well after few more minutes it was very clear this is not quite the covert operation it was made out to be.  As the cyber ponies stopped identifying us that left as free to wander about the base and I wondered I mean get totally lost.

Eventually it boiled down to the Doctor and dirpy arguing that over whose directions are right.  Doctor?  I asked what exactly was the plan again?

(Doctor) the cyber ponies are looking for a very powerful item of some kind and brought them halfway across the universe there seeking out in hopes of free energy to power their facilities for the rest of all eternity.  What strange is now I’m starting to think it’s from your world judging by the way the council was identifying you.  Our destination should be right below us but I have no idea as to how to get their?

As the Doctor said this I cheekily whipped out my pickax and waved it in his face.  O right he said giving me the room two big straight down.  Now as it would turn out a ceiling of the room in which we’re digging into was marginally taller and sealing we had penetrated to get into this mess in the first place.  I really need to listen to that rule never big straight down.  But at any rate after I picked up my body of off the floor and of course made sure dinky was safe inside my helmet and looked around to see what room we had gotten into.

The transportation bay the doctor shouted.  Finally now I can find that power source, bring it back, amplify the signal enact the cyber council’s plan.  I had no idea what he was talking about so I decided to finally get involved in a situation and ask.

What plan?  Of course this question caused the doctor to stare at me as if I were an idiot.

(Doctor)  troll have you been paying attention at all?  The Doctor asked a very frustrated.  Of course edges replied with a simple head shake.  There’s a power here a power so great that brought the cyber man all the way across the universe.  Somehow we need to find it and bring it back here before the cyber ponies can.  If the cyber men did hold it bill use its power their armies and take over the universe but if I get hold of it I can use it to turn all the cyber ponies back into what they should be living breathing creatures.

The only problem the doctor continued on is I’ve been having trouble and so have the cyber ponies with pinpointing its location.  The fight is item doesn’t want to be found.  It’ll give us a general location by an area we go to but any further than that and it seems a trying to scramble the signal like it wants us not to be able to find it but to get close.

This was actually quite puzzling to me I don’t recall anything important being brought from my world two pony world and certainly nothing the significant power but out of curiosity and the need to make one which I had been neglecting to do I decided to make a compass.  Now if I remember correctly notch said the compass would help me free him and any compass I make will be important.

I had plenty of iron and I’m pretty sure this random stuff I freed from a large metal plate with lots of switches on it should act as a red stone.  It’s a good thing I started carrying the crafting table with me.  After explains the doctor what he had just seen as he did have a small freak out about my blaze and down the crafting table I display for him a compass he grew extremely excited when looking at it because apparently it had locked on to something important.

(Doctor)  finally he declared I got the location he said throughing me back my compass everybody into the TARDIS.  as he said that last part he lifted some strange device the same one I believe him to a flash in my face before but of high into the air and then held the button down causing it to glow.  just then a blue box appeared out of nowhere.

Once inside the TARDIS I sat down next to derpy.  Are all of your ventures like this I asked.  The cross eyed pony looked up at the Doctor and replied.

Usually the aspect of reforming an entire race back into scented beans seems to have mike specially hyped up this time.  Tell me troll have you understood anything what’s going on since you started hanging out with us?

I simply replied nop.  I then did and a cheeky smile.  But what strange is that when I smiled a pony she seems to not smile back rather she seemed uncomfortable by my presence.  What’s up I asked?  Pulling out the small pony from my helmet and sending it into her…  Lap I think that’s what you’d call it.

The wandering eyes of the gray mare focused on the small pony.  She then looked up courts the doctor as if cautiously examining to make sure he wasn’t watching.  Troll she said.  We’re time travelers we know the future.  We’ve read history books about you from all aspects of time and it would appear that this is the time or we get to enjoy your company.  But I’m afraid your story is like a book that the ending has been spoiled to.  We already know what’s going to happen.

Just then dinky glared up her mother and with a proof of her horn she made the small muffin appear on her back and quickly darted away off into the piston rooms of the TARDIS.

(derby)  There’s something I’m not allowed to tell you troll.  We already know what you’re looking for.  And we already know how will end between you and herobrine.  That’s the curse of being a time traveler of the bad and the good you know they’re coming in you can do nothing to stop it.

Just then a small plush muffin impacted derby on the head giving a small squeak as the toy bounced off.  When we both looked up to see what was happening dinky was now sitting on the Doctor they both glared silently as.  I then quickly knew that there was information they were not allowed to tell me for fear of messing with timelines are something and then derby was feeling guilty for not telling me something of a grave importance.

(troll)  relax Doctor I have read enough science fiction books to understand not to break the rules of time and space.  After I said that in the most bipolar mannerisms of which I’ve only seen pinky pie before he quickly bounced away back to fiddling with the TARDIS and the information he gathered from the cyber ponies transportation bay.

With a pulled from one of the levers by the TARDIS then began to swing around and rumble to its next destination.  As soon as it clattered in clinked into place the doctor was quickly at the door hurry troll we have an entire race to reform he said as he grasped the door handle.  I quite enjoyed his enthusiasm he reminded me of a noob on his first trip into an abandoned mine shaft so I to join him at the door.  As we flung open the door we both stepped out of the TARDIS and were met by a splash of warm water.

Ignoring the absolutely ridiculous sound generated from my mouth as I fell into the water I found I was now a deep under a very foul tasting liquid.  It was very difficult to describe from above the water I could hear quite the commotion the shouting voices and the stomping hooves.  Then I ran into quite the problem upon my journey back up to fresh air I ran into something big round and soft it was far too heavy for mid left and seemed to be moving in a panic.  After a few mouthfuls of water and being crushed by the large soft whatever that was boring my way finally enchant who’ve grabbed me and the Doctor and sharply lifted us out of the water as I immersed back into the light my eyes were met by quite a sight.  I was in of all things a bathroom surrounded by some very disgruntled royal guards looking down to see what water I was in I found it was a giant bath tub.

At first this confused me the ponies were quite small and I couldn’t imagine why they would need a bathtub as large as this until my brain finally clicked as to why roiled guards were standing in the bathroom and why a large soft round object was baring my way from getting out of water.  I then slowly looked behind me to see who was holding me up.  A rather amused princess of the sun was now holding both me and the Doctor high into the air.

The wet princess then sat back down into the tub dropping us into her lap.

(princess Celestia)  Doctor this is the third time in a sentry you fallen into my bathtub while I was in it.  if I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re flirting with me now what sort of horrible catastrophe have you brought with you this time?  And troll how exactly did you get involved in this?

As I looked around at all the armed guards pointing their spears as and at the bubbled up soaked princess I said the only thing I ever say when weird stuff seems to go down.

(troll)  O dirt blocks…

End of chapter nine.

Celestia VS. Herobrine

After a long explanation as to how I got from pony vill into the princess’s bathroom the Doctor the princess me derby and dinky were now sitting in the main royal chambers the place where I assume the princess worked.  It was a very large room I really don’t know what the purpose is in a 100 block tall ceiling or why you would make it that big but it certainly did look nice.  Ignoring all the architectural details of the room I went back to the conversation we were having about the cyber ponies situation now quickly developing.

(Doctor) so you see princess the doctor explained whenever troll has brought back from his world now is in the castle and the cyber ponies want it.

And!  I added I need to very much find it as quickly as possible as I believe it is a key in how to free notch and save my world.  However from what the doctor was saying the only thing that seems to have a direct lock on it is my compass.  I said holding up the compass.

The princess then showing of her ability to levitate things took the compass from my hand and examined it closely.  I must admit to being somewhat jealous.  Having unicorn powers was really awesome and I wish I'd take more advantage of it while it lasted.  But alas now whenever I wave my hands powerfully a objects they only stood motionless as a taunting reminder to the power I once had.

As I was daydreaming about the possibilities of constructing giant structures using unicorn powers the princess took the opportunity to bean me upon my noggin with the compass she was examining.

(princess Celestica) I believe I know exactly what you're talking about it was brought back with troll after he d-died.

funny I could've swore the princess just stuttered maybe she's catching a cold.  It was not long before she explained that the powerful bedrock sword the same sort notch had asked me to destroy was now sitting in a Canterlot vault apparently be offensive weapon was quite difficult to remove from my armor and took several royal guards two morticians and angry screaming drill sergeant to remove it properly.

Nonetheless we eventually were standing before its glass case an obvious magical aura was surrounding it.  Is this magical aura which would explain why the cyber ponies were having a difficult time locating it?

(Princess Celestica) troll?  I have heard many times of this bedrock substance what is it?  She asked as she stared into the case.

Will princess and explained bedrock is an indestructible substance only the gods use it it's made to define the boundaries of all living creatures in my world.  Most gods use it to ensure the survival of keys structures landmarks and anything they do not wish the test of time to erase.  It cannot be moved nor affected in any way.  It is 100% indestructible and invincible.  as I finish the sentence the princess looked back at me.

I do not know why the princess seems to have wisdom.  Almost like she can foresee certain events or perhaps her age has allowed her review all knowledge in a greater length of detail.  Either way she got on the ball rather quickly.  So tell me troll she asked how is it that herobrine formed a soared out of it?

I thought about her question for a moment.  And now that I think about it it doesn't make sense.  That the only god heroes can move destroying or create bedrock but even they can form and into weapons perhaps this is not bedrock.  As I examine the soared more closely I noticed an inscription on the handle of the sword.  Stasis seal one of 50.  Yep! I declared this is a mod sword.

Mod?  The princess asked.  Don't you mean mob?  She asked.

No princess this soared comes from a place called the mod lands a very long time ago way before my time.  It was allowed for an ordinary hero or god hero to create a mod land.  They would section of a chunk of the world and gain powers within that chunk to make of the entire world the way they wanted it.  The of course there are many rumors about this process some say when you undergo it… it drives you insane.  Unfortunately for whoever creates a mod land it is forbidden for them to never leave it.  For a while the mud lands were permitted open borders between the normal world that notch ruled and whatever perversion of notch is domain blade created.  After several incidents it was then decided that it would be sealed off in a whole plane of their own now the only way through is a mod gate.

Notch said he was trapped in one of these lands I wonder which one.

(Celestia)  I would like to meet this notch one day it would be interesting to meet someone so powerful.  But I'm afraid this cyber pony incident must be dealt with first now doctor how exactly do you plan to use this sword she said pulling it from its case.

The doctor quickly took the soared from the princess's magical grasped and began examining it.  Amongst his tools of examination was the same strange sounding blue light he due several times before and a small set of paper glasses which seem to have two different colored lenses.  he always seemed frustrated.  I don't understand the Doctor said.

There's definitely a power source inside the soared it's nothing like I've ever seen before but the bedrock casing is indestructible how can we get through it?  Troll as anything you can do said giving the soared to me?

Though I had never thought about it before it has now occurred to me that notch asked me to destroy this sword but now I must ask him as the hell that is physically possible mud sword or not the damn things made of bedrock I'm not gonna break it easily.  I then suck the soared into my inventory which cause the squeak of surprise from the doctor.  As my eyes rolled back in my head to examine the soared more closely the princess took the liberty of calming down the Doctor and explaining some of the more interesting details about my anatomy.

I placed the soared into my crafting slot I swear I haven't used this old thing since my noob days normally I just use a crafting table but nonetheless the second I crafted it broke down into a single smaller item.  It was a small see through Cub and it had many moving and parts of me inside that you could see they seem to change color and obviously presented very powerful magic.  Presumably it acted as some form of key and was obviously important.

Nonetheless it was needed to perform a task that I assume was very important to this world and even though I did not know the doctor that well I trusted him enough to give it to him.  Here you go I said dropping it into his…  Hoof?  You know I never pointed this out before but how exactly did the ponies grab stuff?  Even I at least have fingers and inventoried hold things that every time I see a pony pick something up it just seems to float against their flesh.  O well in a world where rocks can actually fall on you and breasts are actually round I suppose anything is possible.

As my new friend examines the cube he excitedly scampered back into his blue box.  Wait here troll and hold this he said throwing a large metallic object at me.  What the heck is this thing I asked?

(derpy)  it was giving to us by the cyber council can you ever pay attention to anything?  Of course to her question I merely give her one of my square smiles I’m not sure of my face ever look sarcastic to these ponies but they sure do act like it is so I assume it’s working.

Eventually the brown pony emerged from the box with more strange metallic objects I didn’t understand it was not long before he cobbled together some form of strange device.  He seem to call it a transmitter and apparently using the Cube as a Power Supply he was going to send something he called an upgrade signal to every cyber pony in known existence.

(doctor)  OK troll here’s the plan.  All you have to do is guard this device.  It will take a few moments to charge.  You can bet that despite your golem activating the highest level security on that Moon base above us they will still come down to investigate.  But I also have a sneaking suspicion your appearance will fry there circuitry again and they won’t be able to attack.

Pulling out my sword I placed the device on a block in the center of the room.  I then was forced to ask whether or not it was safe for the princess to be present during this little experiment.

(derby)  so for the cyber ponies have only attacked those who resisted.  So long as it is only you who defends the device everything should go OK I hope.  After this is all over we should really go out for muffins it’s kind of been a long day for me.

I may have never had a muffin but for some reason I have a feeling that the delicious but getting back to the object at hand.  With a shake of my head I indicated to my new friend that he could begin.  With a flash of the device he calls his sonic screwdriver and a few twists buttons and little switches he eventually got the device working.

(doctor)  troll they should arrive down here any minute there transporters should have them appeared in a circle formation around you but do not attack they should stop long enough to scare in you and the device the confusion will give us more than enough time.

Much to my surprise a large group of cyber ponies appeared around me.  Well I should specify that it was not the cyber ponies that surprised me it was in fact the large iron golem they brought with them that surprised me apparently they sold perfect opportunity of getting rid of it.  The transportation seem to calm it down and as it was no longer fighting anymore and was now quite happy offering flowers to the royal guards and any other pony who is in the vicinity.

(cyber pony)  immense power source detected.  Non upgraded life forms detected.  Enemy too the cyber collective detected.  Hold…  Scanned on verifiable error…  Error…  Error…

Now normally I’m not one to complain when everything is running so smoothly but I was really looking forward to showing everyone my new swords ability.  I named it Call back and I made it up myself.  See I was feeling pretty bad about losing my bow when I died it was a gift from Pone ditch 22.  But it was while I was trying to make some new weaponry I had a great idea.  By and checking my sword I can now fire it out of a bow and by using callback I can bring it right back to me.  Unfortunately it looks like I’m not going to get to use it.  oh well.

Sure enough my very presence stalled to devise long enough for to create a pulse afterwards all the cyber the ponies paused as their heads began twitching back and forth.  After a few brief moments of anticipation all the cyber ponies spoke in Unison.

(cyber ponies in all the universe)  upgrade received downloading…  Downloading…  Downloading…

Oh my notch do you have any idea how long we’re standing there with them just saying downloading over and over again.  It had to have been at least an hour.  In fact it took so long the princess began doing her royal duties once more and dinky took the opportunity to play around with the iron golem.  It seemed quite enjoyed her company.

After a little while I got bored and decided to join their little tea party.

(dinky)  which you like some more muffins Mr. Golem?  She asked the large lumbering brute.  He replied with a small head nod up and down and she happily presented him with a small baked good.  As to where she got them I can only speculate.

Eventually princess luna walked in behind her walked queen chrysalis with bandages on her head.

(luna)  um…  Sister what is going on?  Why is troll bridge here?  She asked before finally looking at the doctor who waved a friendly greeting.  O that explains it.  Doctor are you going to destroy the cyber ponies now?

(queen chrysalis)  maybe I got hit on the head much harder than I thought.

(princess Celestica)  no no my sister.  The doctor and has reformed the great threat that we faced so long ago.  They are now as he said downloading something that will fix them all.  As for you miss chrysalis you must face punishment for what you have done how dare you attack pony vill!

Chrysalis was about to speak and defense to herself when a little dinky pony jumped head first into one of the holes in her legs.  With a torrent of two called the giggles and laughter from both chrysalis and small pony she made her way up chrysalis is body until finally she popped out of her ear and rested comfortably atop chrysalis is head.

Something the confuse me about this action is to how she avoided getting any slime on her as I found quite difficult to even be in the same room without somehow getting the oily substance upon me.

(dinky) Tea party!  The little pony insisted.

(princess)  no no little one you must come away from that one she is dangerous.  come here now away from the queen of changelings.

(dinky)  Tea party!  She said with a small hint of anger in her voice.

Queen chrysalis looked up the small pony who is defying the princess of the sun and repeatedly did a double take from one to the other before finally breaking down and saying…  This is the most adorable pony I’ve ever seen in my life.

An hour to past before was finally forced to pass the question how in the nether dude that pony managed to get us all in dresses?  even the golem.

(luna)  tho should really try to enjoy thine self.  For I it has been 1000 years since I’ve had the pleasure of Dinkies Company.

(troll)  so this is usually when slick with you doctor travel through time and have tea parties?

(doctor)  um when me think… Moon, cyber ponies, princess’s, running, and tea party.  Yep I’d say everything’s just about right for an ordinary day.

(derby)  all we’re missing now is a blue bucket of old folk who smells like cheese and a coconut brought back from the dead and were all set to go for a normal day in the life of the doctor.

Everyone began to laugh and even though I had no idea what anyone was talking about I started to laugh to.  The idea never laughter all the cyber ponies made it being somewhat like an oven done cooking your fish for you.

(the cyber ponies)  download complete.

Finally I declared in delight the upgrade or what every you’d call it is done.  Taking off the frilly dress dinky had somehow can’t be in it clicked on I walked up the cyber ponies.  Curiosity of course taking over me I leave my hand against one of their chests rather than cold steel it was warm and I think I felt something that simulated a heartbeat.

(cyber pony)  hello?  The metallic pony asked its voice mouth drastically changed.  where am I?  As it surveyed surroundings it began doing that various twitching head movements and small awkward pacing that you’d expect from any living creature.

(doctor)  there live I can’t believe it there a live!  The doctor shouted in excitement.  Furrow so long I’ve been dreaming of this and troll you made it happen.  I would never figure out a way to get to the cyber council but with you I sighed they brought his right to them.  This is the greatest day in history.  Imagine the planet’s we saved from the cyber ponies wrath.  Imagine the scientific discoveries we can now make with them.  A future so beautiful and so endless who knows what we can accomplish.

In a flash of light the cyber council now stood before us.

(cyber council)  quite right doctor we shall improve the designs of our metal suits over time to more closely resemble what we once were but is only up from here.  Soon the universe will benefit from living alongside the cyber ponies magic knowledge and understanding will rein in this new era.

(chrysalis)  mmmmmm…  Excitement hope also many delicious emotions.  I must say even I’m getting caught up in all this.

You know it’s strange when something bad happens…  When something very very bad happens something so unbelievable you can’t even comprehend it time slows down.  I don’t care who you talk to, what expert says it doesn’t but it does.  For that moment I saw everyone’s lips slow as they talked everyone who was bouncing about talking with laughter and cheer And expecting this to be a most wonderful day in universal history.  times slowed and in slow motion I felt a disturbance something that chilled me to the bone something that for some reason made me feel cold.  I turned around through the crowd of metal ponies trying to come to terms with their new freedom and interested royal guards looking away from the door and a queen trying to suck the love out of the from what I assume can only pass as the mouth of one of the cyber ponies I looked past them all…

In the doorway stood a familiar face.

In the doorway he stood with the body of the new eyes plopped out and now with blood running from.  Blood gray and from his mouth and out a huge gaping hole in his chest it all collected in a large pool on the floor beneath his feet.  Is sinister square smile shun through the crowd into my view.  He stood there and nestle motion moment and in his hand and I saw the small device we were trying to protect from the cyber ponies still with its glowing cube powering it.  With the additional one of his own devices that I can only speculate where he got he looked at me like you wanted me to watch.  Any press the button.

(cyber ponies)  aaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaahahsrrsfaa th.

All the cyber ponies we were so hard free suddenly fell lifeless on the floor as time began to speed up once more in I was able to comprehend what just happened I said his name.

Herobrine!!!

What?  The doctor shouted in surprise.  He just kill them he killed them all.  They were finally alive and you killed them!

The two the doctors outburst herobrine only started to laugh I knew the doctor was not prepared for the evil herobrine would bring so I shared a bit of information that today I wish I’d kept myself.

(troll) doctor he knows that.  In fact I think he was waiting for them to be alive just so he could end it all.  Just so they could feel pain.

Herobrine only confirm my sentence with the blood dripping smile.  He garbled horribly as he spoke no doubt a result of the severe ones he faced.

(herobrine)  so this is the world you escaped to.  I must say this certainly explains quite a bit.  The magic’s of this place are strong .strong enough to even hurt me he said just ring to the wounds on his chest.  But alas this sick round twisted perversion of a world disgusts me so here’s the deal tell me where my ender crystal is and I won’t kill you all yet.

Ender crystal I thought to myself.  I remembered fighting the ender dragon it was those strange crystals that gave it immortality and made it quite a formidable creature.  But I don’t know why he would think that I…

Just then I remembered the battle between me and herobrine in the battle he was so startled by the element of sacrifice he would go something when he punched his hand into my chest that must be the ender crystal he speaks of.

Seeing as I can take on herobrine once before I imagine doing so again even without my pony magic should be rather it easy.  Not even stopping to a knowledge is question a charge to head on.  He of course blocked my blow with one of his hands and though it felt as though I was hitting the wall I could tell he was definitely weaker than before the elements of harmony definitely left a scar on him.  With another swing of my sword and I managed to knock him of his footing which caused him to retreat out the doorway and off the balcony down onto the courtyard below.

(herobrine)  come out troll bridge founder of them down desolate wasteland of troll bridge city shortly you can do better than that.  He goaded me on.

I was about chasing down to the courtyards when a very pleasant surprise flew past me.  It was the iron golem still wearing its frilly pink dress.  Apparently even though herobrine is not a mob his lifetime devotion to evil was strong enough to set off the golem.  The golem landed on top of herobrine creating a large cloud of dust.

(Celestica)  guards the princess ordered surround the courtyard do not allow herobrine to escape.  within seconds the entire courtyard was now surrounded by royal guards the captain of the royal guards shining armor somehow had appear next to me.

(shining armor)  troll what’s the plan he said deferring to me.  I don’t have any experience with herobrine see you’re going have to tell me what to do.

As I watched herobrine slice the golem into bits effortlessly I decided it was simply too dangerous to allow any pony to fight him.  As I prepared the conclusion that I would have to fight him off here in now I can hear music in the back of my mind.  The music be always played an ingrate coliseum’s as brave heroes would fight armies of mobs.

-“test your might”-

I grabbed my sword and stepped up onto the ledge.

-“test your might”-

I told shining armor to keep his troops are defensive position and to protect the princess.

-“test your might”-

The ponies stepped out onto the balcony with us and I raise my hand as if to order them to stay back.

-“test your might”-

I then quite swiftly and literally jumped into kombat.

-“mortal Kombat”-

With a crushing blow I chopped straight down onto herobrine.  The iron golem that was now badly cut up and damaged finally fell unable to continue its life.  Though put off his footing Herobrine was unfazed by the below it quickly drew his diamond soared to face me.

(herobrine)  obsidian armor he remarked even I can’t do that notch it would appear is still working against me.

He used his mighty strength to knock the soared from my hand but was a simple matter of using callback I was able a slash you crossed his face which once again sent him backwards to regroup.  The blows were sloppy and did very little damage.  His skin was practically impenetrable in my armor was quite the same.  Behind the royal guards stood an assortment of upper class ponies now cheering me on in the fight.  The tip of his sword managed to do some damage to my hand but I quickly recovered and knocked into the ground.  The once mighty herobrine now was put on the defensive to my onslaught.

This evil and vial creature had destroyed everything I ever cared about and even though he is the reason I came in this new world his sins against my people are unforgivable and I will not allow them to have these ponies.  With one last blow a gem my sword deep down his throat.  My blood lust finally ended but I’m afraid it was not enough.

Herobrine with my sword gouged into his chest began his choked blood curled sword swallowing laughter.  you sick monster I screamed why won’t you die I said pulling sword out and hitting him on the head repeatedly the sharp edge of the blade doing nothing to his hard skin.  I tried my best to take him on there was none enough he stood up spit out my sword and with one mighty punch broke straight through my armor.  As I hit the wall behind me it came to realize that every bone in my chest was now completely shattered and the familiar tasted blood was once again in my mouth.

(herobrine)  well well the mighty troll did you think you could actually stop me?  did you think you can actually save these things from my wrath?  Now my dear clothed enderman usual once more know death he said as he pulled a soared high into the air.

I couldn’t believe it we had our entire adventure lined up we’re going to save my world we’re going to save everyone in with a wave of herobrine is mighty hand he can just end it all.  I was looking for to save my world but now I fear there’s no way to save this one.  Just as I accepted my fate and was waiting for herobrine sword to come down and cut me in half I heard a voice.

(Celestica)  No!  The princess screamed as she jumped down and slammed down to the ground over top of me.  But I don’t care if he’s a hero half pony or diamond dog.  You shall never lay a hand on my troll bridge ever again.

With several flashes of the princess’s horn herobrine was forced back in pain.  Slowly the giant form of the princess walked from over top of me and closer to herobrine the magic penetrating his body and even his strength useless against the influence.

He tried to swing his sword in her but it was no good she stopped it with only her horn and with what I assume would be a kick but it was with her front legs she said herobrine flying back into a building.  The royal guards through their spears at him but of course they did no damage with one order from the princess they backed off.  Another flash of light pulled herobrine from the wreckage and sent him flying courts the princess.  At first I thought this to be one of herobrine’s attack’s but as the princess turned around to allow her back to face herobrine I found a lot of enjoyment and what I was about to see.  Both her hind legs shot into the air and kicked herobrine square in the mouth.

If it didn’t hurt so much to breathe I would definitely laughed at that.  Herobrine eventually dropped his sword and before he could get back up the princess was quite literally on top of him.  It was not so much of the fight now but more of the princess jumping on trampoline.  I don’t care how strict on herobrine is those giant tree trunks she calls legs have to be doing some kind of damage.

Herobrine manage to throw one could punch and I thought at first the princess was injured but once again confusing my ability to understand how she grabs things she picked up herobrine’s leg using her own front of it with a great measure of delight slammed him back and forth against the ground.  The finally she threw herobrine back into the building she had slammed into earlier and continue her onslaught of magic.

OK I know this, some weird but you need understand where I come from fighting is a definite turn on and I’m pretty sure even in my horribly injured state I might….  Here I’m saying here might.  Have possibly gotten a cobblestone.  But not because it was the princess just because It was a fight I swear.

Such power is very rarely seen by anyone’s eyes but nonetheless herobrine cannot stand up to it.  FUCK this he shouted before finally grabbing an Ender pearl in one of his hands.  But before I go have a little present he said throwing something the pixel round with green spots to the princess’s hooves.  Crushing the Ender pearl in his hands he disappeared and the battle was over.

I looked down in horror to see something ancient something old and something only used by the god heroes themselves.  a spawn egg not just any spawn egg but the spawn egg of a creeper.

(trolls conscience)  and moved dummy move!  I thought to myself.

Without thinking or any self preservation I quickly Teleported what was left of my broken body and armor over the now standing creeper making shore the princess was protected.

(creeper)  what the FUCK!  BOOM!

After the blast and pain myself to look up the princess was fine but she was now holding me and screaming something about an ambulance.  Hey I said.  We just kicked herobrine’s  ass how cool is that?

The princess was too focused on controlling the entire situation to hear what I said so silently and without bothering her further I just passed out.

(princess Celestica)  quickly call the anthropologist lyra harp strings and teller to me as if the hospital.  Hang on troll everything’s going to be OK.  The words faded slowly as I drifted off to sleep…

End of chapter 10…

(authors notes)  well I’m not very happy at how these chapters of been turning out.  Judging from a lack of comments I would say you guys stopped following hopefully I can do better when we put the ponies and trolls world.  For those of you who are actually still following this story I thank you.  And for those at no doubt lost along the way thanks for giving my story sometime in the first place have a nice day and thank you for reading. 

Hands

I have been thinking a lot about pain.  Pain and the eventual response of passing out afterwards should the pain be so severe and I have not come up with any basic opinion on the subject but what I have come up with is a question.  In my five years of life one year of being dead and a few days of being alive again I have experienced approximately seventy zombie bites, fifty and arrow’s from skeletons, twenty soared slashes from zombie pig man or enemy heroes should such an encounter happen, One massive punch from an iron golem, twenty seven burns by lava or fire, about a million cactus needles,  too many creeper explosions to count and of course the ultimate thrashing from herobrine himself.  This is only a small list of the horrible amount of pain I must go through in daily life granted my life is not typical of most heroes considering the current events that are transpiring.  But nonetheless this staggering list has given me one question.

Why do we need to feel pain?  An expert would tell you it’s to alert you to the dangerous situation.  Believe me there are different levels of pain if we only had the lowest level we would still know we are in danger.  Whether it is from lava or a zombie is irrelevant we would still be well aware of it with only a gentle nudge from are reflexes and be better equipped to deal with it as sometimes pain is too much too ender for the long-term success.

A more religious villager would simply say is that way notch intended.  To this I must now question why would notch invent something he cannot feel?  That’s a little bit like trusting a vegetarian to properly cook your beef for you.  The though they have a vague idea without the benefit of experience how do they know how high into the flame or how well done the meat should be.  So still my question remains, why is it that I can feel pain and what is that annoying beeping sound?

As I finally woke up and open my eyes I was bombarded by the extreme sense of familiarity.  I was now lying in bed with a extremely thin blanket they give you as more of a taunting reminder of what you could have in the way of warmth but not actually provide any of its grasp onto.  there’s a small machine sitting next to me checking my her rate and lied before it was a rather small room that seem to be kept very clean.

Kick ass I shouted I’m not dead I’m in a hospital.  Of course in my intent to move I caused a small amount of pain to myself.  Apparently I was still severely injured and require a little bit more time to heal.  Looking around I could find no pony else to talk to I had a few questions to ask.  With all the excitement than just gone on it felt as though it shouldn’t be so quiet now.  But of course my wish was soon granted for an audience as my commotion caused someone outside the door to hear me and then that someone quickly ran off to go tell more ponies as to my condition.  I wonder was at the same royal guard who stood outside my door my first day to pony vill.  No troll you’re just being paranoid I said to myself.

I then heard the sound of hooves plopping their way down the hall.  Judging by their speed pitch and general Mary nature I have a pretty good assumption as to which pony is going to burst through the door first.  I attempted to prepare some form of troll to catch the pony off guard but unfortunately I simply don’t carry the same variety of junk in my inventory that like I used to.  But I did manage to make do with the pumpkin one of the ones left over from nightmare night placing it on my head I waited for the pony to enter.

“clop”  ”clop”  ”clop”

Well I must admit to being somewhat disappointed that the pumpkin did not cause any reaction however a form or overwhelming feeling of surprise struck me as though I knew the pony who was going to enter the room first I did nothing she could manage to somehow stuffed an entire musical parade cart through the door like she did.

As the door slammed open and the cart squeezed its way to the door and slammed into the middle the room and opened up as the pink pony slid in front of it to begin her song.

(pinky) “get well, get well, get well”

“a hart felt get well to you”

“get well, get well ,get well”

“I hope you get well soon”

“get well, get well ,get well”

“get well enjoy the day ”

“get well, get well ,get well”

“come back to pony vill someday ”

As she finished her dance she quickly pulled her head down allowing a small door on the cart behind her to open and one shot a delicious confection which splattered all over my face.

(troll)   mmmmmmm…  Round cake my new favorite.  Thank you pinky.

As the cake was magically wiped from my face I looked around the room to see whom was now here.  As far as I could tell it was every pony.  Twilight was the first to come to my side and talk to me.

(twilight)  troll how are you doing?  She asked pointing to the bandages that were now thoroughly rapt underneath my clothing.

Don’t worry I feel fine I should heal up by the end of the day is everything ready for the trip to my world?

(apple jack)  everything’s more than ready… but maybe you should stay here.  She said looking kind of awkward.

Stay here?  I asked what why should I stay here?  We need to go save my world unless you guys don’t want to in which case I guess I can do it all myself.

(rarity)  no no darling you have done so much for us we just think it would be safer if you stayed here and let us handle it.  She said grasping my hand.

Now it is being silly I said I’m guessing you’re afraid I’m going to die again but I assure you even if I did die it wouldn’t matter.  As I said that all the ponies gasped.

(vinyl)  troll man it would not be cool if you died and what you mean it wouldn’t matter?

I then gave a sigh.  Listen it wouldn’t matter if I died because notch can just spawn me granted in his current state I would take a few years but if we succeed and save my world he can just respond me in an instant so in a way I can’t die.  It’s you ponies I’m afraid four.  I don’t think notch can help you should something happen so it would be much better if I took the beating in you just use those elements when we need them.  So just relax everything is going to be OK.

So now I said let’s go over the plan shall we?  After all I’d hate to go in on this thing with a bow but no arrow’s.  So who is coming with me?

(vinyl scratch)  O you know I am square head with my base cannon and pinkies party cannon we’re going to rock your world.  The DJ pony said jumping excitedly in the air.

Octavia the ruled her eyes.  I suppose I’ll be coming to at the very least I can keep an eye on vinyl but if need be I did take fencing classes so I will be some help with the soared.

I noticed in the back Derpy standing there with her child and time traveling companion at her side.  With the TARDIS we can pop it on you every now and again but for now this is going to be goodbye and good luck.  The trio left the room inviting in a somewhat amused queen of changelings.

(chrysalis)  I’m certain you see the irony in you coming to the hospital only after you put me there.  I will also be joining you and to ease any of your thoughts of my disloyalty I must tell you it is not to say our worlds but to save an individual list on my heart.

At that last bit of information I grew terrified and found the phrase please please oh notch lets it not be me begin repeating in my mind.  Fortunately however my intentions were resolved as she finished her declaration of love.  She is pink fluffy and speaks in the most elegant and beautiful language I’ve ever heard.  Chrysalis then made a strange noise with her mouth and tongue that sounded something like flatulence.    Ffppulf

As the bug pony grew ever more lost in thought she wandered away from her bedside manner and to the window.  Well I think that’s about everybody I declared rubbing my hands together.  Let’s go to my world.  To the nether portal I shouted.  Of course my shots were quickly turned to ones of pain as my ribs and not healed fully.  I’ve never had a long lasting injury like this before.  Normally even horrible injuries such a snapped bones and missing eyes can repair themselves in a short amount of time.  But herobrine it’s hard to explain he has some kind of presence about and it seems to mess up everything.  I can only imagine what horrible twisted powers of my world came together to create such a horrible monster.

(Rainbowdash)  actually big guy if you are coming with us we should probably wait until your ones are healed.  As she finished she decided to set on the bed next to me.  You kind of remind me of myself when I was younger I was always getting hurt.  No pain no game if you not I mean.

Rainbowdash then put the back of one of her legs in my face.  Note to self-gather as much red stone is needed and invent proximity of alarm to warn me when these ponies try and put their feet my face… or hooves whatever.  Rainbowdash then began regaling of a past memory.

(Rainbowdash)  I don’t know if you can see it anymore but their use to be a pretty bad scholar on this leg from a slight accident I might have caused in one of the earth ponies aeronautics facilities.  I heard they were trying to find a way to make their balloons faster and I might’ve strapped one of those things to my back.  Well let’s just say what works for my pet tank does not work for me.

Of course ignoring all laws of physics pinky pie burst from my pillow case and onto the opposite side of the bed from Rainbowdash.  I have a story from the rock farm.  Now I’m afraid I’m going to have to spare you the horrible agonizing sorrow of hearing a pinky pie told story not for lack of want to troll you but more of I have no idea what she said.  It was without a doubt the most crazy off the wall and venture I’d ever heard of.  Something about a rock farm and a magical rock that a grant you three wishes but only after you saved his daughter from the mighty ghost of a lead pipe by the tool shed.  honestly I think I’m doing it justice right now in forms of clarity and basic so story structure.  But eventually every pony started telling their stories from childhood.

Vinyl and Octavia both basically told the same story but in totally different settings.  Vinyl tell a story filled with rave parties and neon colored fluid that I’d rather not go into detail about.  Meanwhile Octavia story was filled with well-dressed well-mannered ponies then came to hear the music in a very high class amphitheater one in which she had somehow gained free access to as the owner was a friend of her father.  They both have the end result of them finding their cutie marks for music and I suppose it showed how well made out there for each other as roommates.

Twilight told a story about taking smarty pants to school and princess CelesteTia agreeing that twilight can take on smarty pants as her own student.  Flutter shy story I couldn’t hear all, chrysalises was a gross an rarities was about fashion.  The only story I really connected with was apple jacks mainly because of the hardworking nature of her family and how well they would fit into my world only…  Well minus the fighting.

We’re so caught up in the stories that we didn’t even notice the door open.  I was the first to see what pony walked in and I was rather surprised I could understand visiting me after I come back from the dead but I didn’t understand what she was visiting now.  It was the princess and she now stood directly over twilight looking down at both me and the and used audience of ponies unaware of her presence.

(princess)  I’m afraid a story of my filly days is simply too far back for you to relate to.  but I can tell you one of when I was younger.  Every pony was shock turned in quickly bowed before the princess.  Let me see an she said having a seat next my bedside of course pinky throwing down a pillow just before the princess can get to the floor.  thank you pinky she remarked.  Now then she began her story again.  I believe granny Smith was visiting me she was much younger of course and there was still a few farms that were much closer to cantor lot.  I actually quite miss them now but of higher ponies on the social ladder demanded to be separated from the site of the hardworking individuals have given their food.  Anyway granny Smith was in the process of instructing me on as to how many apple trees she could stand to take back with her to apple acres.  I insisted she stayed for dinner of course she didn’t quite understand what I meant as rather than coming to dinner she made it for me a very nice gesture that I couldn’t turn down.  My world guards being who they are or constantly checking the food for poisoning or being tampered with.  I knew miss granny Smith would never hurt me but the guards will be the guards best let them have their fun.

Eventually granny Smith walked in with several apple pies the guards in their haste to check them accidentally tripped and sent the delicious confection all over miss granny Smiths face. she was quite frustrated with the whole ordeal and threw two pies at the guards in retaliation but of course they ducked leaving me rather exposed.  It took me forever to get the pie out of my hair.  Of course the entire incident was made up to be a big deal in circles of the royal guards but looking back on it granny Smith and I both see the humor.

The ponies sat there astounded I guess they’re not used to sing royalty top with such a sense of humility and with a humorous outlook on a rather embarrassing tale.  I then notice to gaze of all ponies and the room including the princess turned towards me.  What I asked?

(vinyl)  well troll tells a story about when you’re little.  I’ll bet you were a pretty crazy child.  She said prodding me a little.

I only just looked around and let out a breath.  I think you guys are forgetting something.  Only villagers have childhoods and that’s only three to four days.  I came into existence already an adult and I didn’t really have time for fun.  Heck the kind of fun you guys are talking about…  for most people fun just doesn’t exist.  I’m sorry to be a downer but that’s not how things work where I come from.  I wish I could say I had a lot moments like you describe but back home we needed to find joy in the things you find most wearable.  Fun for us is killing a roomful of zombies and taking some treasure that was probably left behind by some poor soul who may have been relying on that last bit of food or armor to get him to safety and failed.  Those stories don’t exist where I come from.

Every pony looked rather sad I suppose they had never really thought about that aspect of my life.  Which is understandable is easily to be blinded by hero to battles and soaring adventures that you forgive the only thing that makes those things fun is that you have a break from every now and then for me this world is that only break.

(princess)  actually troll I wish to speak to you for a moment alone if possible.  As the princess finished her words I find myself once again commenting on the amazing abilities of the ponies to define all laws of physics.  You see the last time I checked living creatures could not vacate the room so quickly as to actually leave behind a smoke trail but nonetheless they did.  The only ones left in the room were me the princess and chrysalis who is now steering at a drawing of a large fluffy pony.  She only broke her concentration on the drawing long as to realize she was not welcome in the room and quickly vacated.

(chrysalis)  I’ll be back to visit again troll I need to go lay a couple hundred eggs as is my duty to the changeling race.  See you later my future slave.

Of course I knew she was joking or at least I hope she was.  Nonetheless I was now alone with the princess well princess what is it you wish to talk about?  I asked.

(princess)  troll she said laying one of her legs across me.  I wish to ask you something… this herobrine character I’ve never felt anything like it before.  I’ve met so many horrible and evil creatures in my lifetime but he’s different.  Tell me what do you know of my sister?

Her question rather cut me off guard here I thought we’re talking about herobrine and somehow she’s flipped its family matters nonetheless I answered and said I didn’t know very much about it at all.

(princess) as I’m certain you’ve already been made aware of my sister was once known as nightmare Moon.  She had committed horrible crimes.  Above that of chrysalis and from what I can think of only rivaled by that of herobrine.  But in many ways it was my doing that caused it.  She was pushed into being evil she was pushed by neglect.  Neglect from me her followers and even her own friends.  She had a difficult role in life and troll for to a very dark place.  The princess then stared sadly out the window.

What does this have to do with herobrine I asked are you suggesting something?  The princess turned her head to look at me and leaned closer in.

(princess) I must know Troll are we to treat herobrine not like criminal we think he is or like a lost soul to be redeemed?  I understand there are fundamental differences between our worlds that is why I have come to use to ask is there any redemption and herobrine as heart?

I thought about it for a moment of a good herobrine would help rather than hinder the restoration to our world however I do not think that was likely I was forced to explained the princess but few things about my world.  Princess you must understand in your world peace is achievable but that is not the case for my it is built and run by conflict we build walls so the creepers can’t get in we make swords for the purpose of killing zombies good vs. evil that is the way it must be in my world herobrine shows his path he chose the one he believed would end the conflict but that’s just it it’s the same tune into conflict at least it is in my world if the fights over so is everything. Believe it or not I honestly believe herobrine is trying to be merciful he is trying to finally be laid to rest.

(princess)  laid to rest and forgive me troll but I do not follow.  She asked streaming a wrinkle in my sheets.

Herobrine was a direct creation from notch.  notch design him not to be able to die that way there would be a balance between the mobs that spawn during the night and the large number and heroes that would spawn anywhere weak and helpless it was herobrine’s job to lead them to help them grow.  I imagine it was also his job to love them and watch them turned to dust it must driven him insane.  A god hero who actually cares about the affairs of mortals.  I can’t even imagine what it must have felt like trust me when I say putting herobrine down for good is an act of mercy.

The princess seemed unsettled by my evaluation.  No doubt she was the forgiven for get type always looking to reform always looking for the peaceful way out but that’s not the way it works were I come from.  As she looked at me she seemed to be someone curious.  God hero she asked?  Tell me troll how much power to the so called god heroes have?

Well princess the god heroes like herobrine were created by notch but for a very different purpose herobrine’s purpose was to take care of the normal heroes to be a leader who can understand their problems but god hero cares nothing for the affairs of mortals it was once said that they could be rather cruel and kind that to them it was only a wave of the hand.  It was basically their job to extend notch is power notch maybe almighty but even his imagination has limits and they would help in creating new landscapes.  This was also the beginning of the mod lands.  Think of them kind of like tests chambers notch would allow people to run their own little universe to see if they could get things better than he could notch of course taking the best from each world and leaving whole thing to brought by itself by myself have never been to a mod land so I’m not very well read on the information about it.  You know some say just as the god heroes could not understand the problems of common man so could notch not understand the problems of the god hero and therefore could not even understand the existence of his lesser creations.

May I ask you a question I asked as I took off the princess’s front shoe and did something sort of like a handshake but meant to be more intimate like friends.

(princess)  of course troll has something been troubling you?  She asked taking off the other shoe and grabbing both my hands in a somewhat forceful in brace.

I’ve been faced with a rather difficult decision as of late.  I assume you’re offered for me to stay here and pony vill is still open right.  She nodded confirming my beliefs.  Well now that I’m not a pony it’s not as easy to make that decision again.  Ignoring the physical problems with me coming this world there are some emotional ones.  If I lived here and did get married are whenever when I live forever after all my people don’t age when I just end up going insane like herobrine?

(princess)  troll allow me to give you a bit of advice she said trying to brush with little hair I had on the back of my head.  When you do live forever like me or luna or cadence you always run to that problem that horrible question of are you still capable of loving the ones around you and it is a very simple answer.  Yes even though other ponies will be like sunsets to you. you can still enjoy them grieve them in close hold them tight and when it is time to let go remember them fondly.  Luna told me about your rather uncomfortable encounter with her.  Do you honestly believe fluttershy is the only pony she’s done that with?  Do not ever doubt the fact that she cares for fluttershy but also do not think for a moment that she is not capable of more.  I myself have been romantically involved with many ponies and of course most of which are secret it is usually better that way considering my influence but nonetheless.  I cared for all of them I was friends with all of them and when the time came I led all of them go and for some reason I feel better for it better for being part of their lives.

I felt a bit bad about breaking emotional scene there for a moment but I had a question of my mind.  Wait I said or you much older than those ponies.  The princess seemed rather amused by my question.  And was mumbling something along the lines of why does everyone keep asking that?

Troll, she explained.  I have lived long enough to see mountains reduced to rubble by time an entire Rivers move miles from their original paths.  In the end I just have to accept the fact that I’m going to end up dating someone who isn’t anywhere near my age.  Luna told me about your little accident.  Though fluttershy is obviously much younger than my sister she is of an age where she can to consent to her own actions there’s nothing wrong with her being with my sister.  And when fluttershy moves on which experience tells luna she will eventually lead has her eye on a much smaller young colt by the name of pipsqueak.  Of course luna is a very careful she does not wish to impose on him when he is a child for that would be unforgettably wrong but as soon as he is of age she has every intention of taking advantage of pipsqueaks idol worship.  She’s already designing her wedding dress for the day.  And I too have had my eye on a couple of ponies now and again why I even thought about you but I suppose the suit be a bad time to bring that up besides there’s a much more important matter I wish to discuss with you.

And what is that princess I asked.

The princess then sat there for a moment silent. I believe she was thinking of the right words to say or something but nonetheless eventually she spoke up.  I’m coming with few she said now even though there’s no other pony in the room with us and an the room was normally very quiet before she said that sentence for me it did feel like there’s a definite change in the room when she said that.  Eventually I was simply a forced to ask “are you crazy” of course before I could utter another word I was then quickly reminded of the strange magnetic attraction that these ponies hooves seem to have for the my face for she then quickly covered my mouth and spoke to me as if she was ordering a child.  It’s kind of funny her hooves actually smell kind of good no doubt a result of being a princess.

(princess)  I have thoroughly thought this through troll.  Your world obviously has a leg up over mine in terms of physical strength and brutality but magic seems to be your downside my magic can stop herobrine therefore can stop anything else in your world I’m quite certain of it.  As for the zombies and skeletons I’ll have to remind you that I’m princess of the sun I doubt any zombie will have the ability to attack me.  So when you’re healed you know where to go and I will be joining in their so please get your bed rest.  She then uncovered my mouth and left the room.

I once again sat alone in my hospital bed watching my ribs heal when my brain finally turned back on.  The Ender crystal I thought.  I remembered that herobrine had lost the device used to control his undead army inside my chest cavity when I was dying however this is not the same body and as before it a small panic I looked around at the various things I could use to gain some attention.  I saw a small magical bell it was labeled call for nurse on it.  As I swiftly picked up the bell and gave it a good shake two ponies walked into the room one I recognized as a nurse and the other was a pony I’d never seen before.

The pony was a strange mixture of blue and green that is to say it was very difficult to tell the difference.  I suppose a lighting and when seen at a certain angle to that light her co could be called green but at the same time in different lighting and could easily be mistaken as blue as suppose if I were to spend the time with wool and some dies I could figure out whether her co is in fact green or blue.  She was also very clearly a unicorn with some form of strange device as her cutie mark it had many strains upon it that seem to be held with a large degree of tension perhaps I thought this was some form of weapon if so it can certainly fire more arrows than anything in my world but alas I have no time for this.

(lyra)  well it’s nice to finally meet you Mr. Troll bridge.  My name is lyra harp strings I’m the foremost anthropologist in all of equestrian.  She said taking a closer look at me.

Yes I said lyra is it? I must leave the hospital at once I have an important matter to engage in.  The future of all of equestrian depends on it.  As I finish my statement the nurse seemed rather offended.  There is no way you’re leaving in this condition she said even with the remarkable heal rate of your body these injuries are far too severe.  I was getting ready to protest however lyra silenced the nurse for me.  Please she insisted I know you’re a nurse and everything but I am after all the way the best anthropologist in equestrian I shall explain to Mr. Bridge why he cannot leave.  Please go back to work and I will take care of this as the nurse left the blue slash green pony approached me.

What is it exactly you need Mr. Troll bridge?  To this question I swiftly answered I must find where they buried me after I died I need to…  For lack of better term desecrate my own remains.  Please you must understand the fate of equestrian could hang in the balance.  The pony paused and thought about what I’d said for a moment after a small glance all around the room she looked at my hands which were now sitting on my lap above the covers.

(lyra)  w-well troll normally I would say no to this but since you have displayed to me that it is so important maybe something can be arranged in a formal deal perhaps.

This statement rather puzzled me as though I had money I had thus far not seen any pony quite interested in it.  Don’t get me wrong ponies obviously wanted money but it was rather an end result in mind that made them want the money.  Whether it be a new tool for plowing fields or an important repair needed on the home thay appeared to not be excessively greedy.  OK I said how much money do you want?

The pony smiled no she said I don’t want any money like I said I’m an anthropologist.  That is the study of creatures that walk on two legs and appeared to be of ape descendants.  There are many strange creatures in our world like this however no creature has showed as such a dedication to the basic shape and the pledges study like humans.  You are for lack of better term pure.  All I want in return for letting you leave is to run one or two tests.

(troll) fine then it’s a deal I said.  Lyra was greatly pleased by what I’d said an quickly took a position beside me on a stool.

From seemingly nowhere she acquired a quill and a large book of blank paper.  Now then she said to me I’ve had plenty of scans of your chest a bonus to doing all that medical work on you a few hours ago.  But may I see one of your hands?  Her question confuse me for a moment but nonetheless I displayed forward one of my open hands.

(lyra)  b-basic b-bone structure seems to be similar to that of other known life forms she said writing on a paper.  And as her examination when on things began getting slightly more physical as she asked me a grasped things squeeze them and various other forms of physical dexterity of my hand.  Once we are is her voice can strangely going in and out of most as if she was breathing heavy are panting perhaps even nervous about something.

Eventually however things took a turn down a very strange road.  O um Mr. Troll bridge she said would you mind terribly if I determined the excretion rate of salt through your skin?  I of course did not exactly know what she meant so I merely said yes.  Almost instantaneously the mouth of the small blue pony suddenly opened up and clamped tightly down around my hand.

For just a moment the room when completely silent and I stared deep into the eyes of my new parasitic companion.  As I raised the pony high into the air I prepared myself for the invention of a whole new dance move one that involved spitting your arm around your head like a crazy man in the intent to shake off a rather unwanted guest.  But even with the added weight of the pony I was soon standing on my bed in spite of my injuries and was now doing something I have not done since a party thrown by an old acquaintance of mine Rave Girl 69.  Ignoring my nostalgic get thoughts I then began flowing my arm about like an idiot as fast as I could hoping that the circular centrifugal force would be enough to pry the pony loose.

Well I was wrong she held fast tighter than ever and when I stop to examine any possible way of crying her off I felt her soft warm and slimy tongue sliding between my fingers.  The most disturbing part of this whole experience was the incredible suction I swear to notch if it turns out this pony is an expert at devouring living creatures whole and I end up in her stomach I’m going to be really pissed off.  I then began several more methods they range from reason from bribery to plain old brute force.  But man nothing I did could break this ponies lockjaw.  Yet another reason never to date a pony.

Eventually I figured it would be within my best interest to figure out a sneak your way of getting her off.  Placing my hand on the back of her head I had the intention of triggering her gag reflex after words I’d be free.  Well that didn’t work either.  I’m starting to have serious concerns about the devouring pony theory as certainly nothing so far has led to their disapproval.  Jamming my fist deep into the pony’s throat I was met with no resistance.  In fact in a rather than fighting the motion she swiftly grabbed my arm and stuffed it down as far as she could get it.  Whilst I’m certain the boys here must love this about their women I on the other hand and finding it quite inconvenient.

I got many bizarre looks as I drug my new pony glove through the hallways to the front desk my ribs still hurt but it wasn’t so bad to stop me from getting up.  I could still feel the slimy tongue sliding all the way up and down my arm this is by far the weirdest predicament I’ve ever been in well not quite.  I suppose on the train ride to cantor lot the situation was very much the same only unfortunately for me it was quite reversed.  I then shuttered thinking about it.  Finally at long last the front desk was being manned by a pony.

She began the usual way asking how she could help me but then quickly stopped off in to stare at my current infliction.  Well I thought at least no one will notice me leaving here after all there too busy steering at lyra.  I then continued on out the door when I was stopped by a the different pony she had a blue and pink main and for a cutie mark had three pieces of candy something I had learned to quite enjoy in my time spent here.

(bonbon)  please tell me not again.  I’m terribly sorry Mr. She’s not usually like this.  But it has been awhile since I use that spelled pleasure her so I suppose I’ll have to fix this.  The strange pony and whispered something into lyra’s ear however it did not seem to have much of an effect on the snakelike pony now clamped around my alarm.  As bonbon began to speak again her voice she sharply cracked and changed it was as if I was talking to an entirely different pony.  Well don’t worry Mr. She will let go eventually and once again I’m terribly sorry for this it’s a little bit of a weakness of hers.  I hope you won’t hold it against her because other than this she is a truly kind hearted pony.

(troll)  seeing is my hand is currently placed against her heart I have no choice to agree with you but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s on the hand I used to do everything with can you at least help me get her off?

The pony who I just met only shrugged I’ve never been able to do it I always just pay the changeling for the whole night besides I quite like are this way she seems so peaceful but maybe there something I can do to help.  As her voice cracked again and change back to what originally was she put the small piece of candy into my other hand.  In a flash of what I thought it first was to be blew but now I’m starting to think is green the pony quickly switched arms unfortunately it seems I’ve lost about 2 inches in the exchange as this arm was very clearly deeper in her mouth.  Silently and curse having such perfectly square limbs as I believe this is what pony is able to get such powerful grip.

(bonbon)  well lyra I’m afraid I have no time to deal with you today I’ll see you back at the motel and please leave Mr. Troll bridge behind.  The obviously somehow affiliated pony left once again leaving me with my predicament.  well I thought to myself at least I can finally use the shovel.  Luckily for me something’s never change regardless of what world are in because in this city so am very heavily visited by tourists there were several maps located in public areas throughout the city one of which seem to be a garden filled with all sorts of statues and stone monuments within these monuments with something called the final resting place of troll bridge.

Yes I declared holding my pony club in the air I have found the tomb I tried to set off and run but it would seem my chest is still not fully healed and running seems to hurt it so I decided to carry the pony all the way to my grave.  It was actually not that long walk but when you pass so many high class ponies who stare at you like you’re the weirdest thing they’ve ever seen in their life it turns the feet in to Miles but eventually we did get there.  Luckily none of the ponies seem to know how to shake down an inventory so I still had my shovel on my person I’m certain twilight is holding on to my armor and sword for me.  As I prepared to dig up the grave I was swiftly struck with a feeling of doom for the grave had already been desecrated.  A large hole was right where my head should be if I was indeed very correctly.  At first I was afraid herobrine got here but if he did why ask me about the crystal?  Plus upon further inspection and the whole was round not square so herobrine could not have done it.  But nonetheless my body was missing and we have no time to go for a dead man hunt.

Funny I said to lyra my new sidekick in the investigation it would appear that there’s no sign of digging on the surface other than the whole that’s probably why no one noticed.  But from what I’ve seen of these ponies they need to move dirt they can’t take it.  It’s almost like something dug its wait out.  O well the I said to myself it’s probably nothing as I walked away to go trying me up with twilight I continued to try and remove the pony glove.  Unbeknownst to me there was a small sheet of ice covering the inside of the cascade deep underground when mostly this thing inside was making it very cold.

Welcome To Hell

Things were finally becoming more someone organized. This is normally not the scope of my life for you see my life is not that of a normal hero this typically makes things very messy confusing and really hard to follow up on especially if you’re someone with my lacking attention span.  Luckily I have an erratic obsessive compulsive control freak pony as a best friend and the fact that she’s the unicorn who can cast magic without the need of killing things is not too bad either.

The scenery around me was familiar we were back in a very special room a room in which a porthole to my world was built and we have a need for such a portal once more.  Rather than of course charging in head first like I would twilight insisted on being a little bit more organized with our assault.  We had already gotten through the very messy and loud argument over whether not the princess at should attend this little endeavor.  Of course the princess got her way seeing as she is technically ever once boss.  Despite twilight disapproving of it she was chosen to be the tactical manager for our little expedition seeing as the last one was done so sloppily it resulted in my death. This time we would be prepared.

We all stood in line for twilight to inspect us a very long stretch of paper floating in front of her face magically.  I found myself thinking of what process she had to go to make a sheet that big. In my experience you require crafting table to get paper and it makes a standard size in order to make a paper of such length you require a very large room with craft tables laid end to end.  But then of course I’ve seen of the ponies do not use crafting tables at all which raises the question as to how they make anything.  Eventually my train of thought was forced to stop at a station as twilight was now a dressing the entire group assessing our abilities and making sure we were prepared.

(twilight)  pinky pie she said turning towards the bubble gum scented and always bouncy young mayor.  You and vinyl are going to be on artillery.  Your party cannon and vinyl’s base cannon should give us a huge advantage over anything we might face.

(Vinyl)  boy I can’t wait to see what trolls world is like.  I bet the people there can party.  To the end of final statement pinky group quite the wide little smile on her face.

Twilight however silenced us as she was not yet done.  Earth ponies will carry swords unless there on the artillery and pay a sigh will carry bows and arrows.  Twilight then turn courts me and the princess.  The princess obviously will give us a huge magical advantage but it’s also noteworthy that no one day creature from trolls world can touch her for I assume they would burst into flame.  As for queen chrysalis…  Twilight then stopped to look around queen chrysalis was nowhere to be seen.

Hey bug pony I shouted where’d you get to?  I looked all around the room and I didn’t see her anywhere.  I saw the royal guards or still trying to convince Celestia not to go.  Then I saw the royal guards a chrysalis who had no doubt come from the same reason.  I find this world very strange and that fact I was no doubt the king of my city and yet should there be a battle I would be on the front lines.  The thought occurred to me that chrysalis might run off but as to why her royal guards are still here I have no idea.

(Rainbowdash)  that changeling must’ve betrayed us and run off scared.  I knew we couldn’t rely on her.  Rainbowdash said circling over everyone.

One of the bug ponies royal guards made a grunt as if disapproving a Rainbowdash as analysis of course Rainbowdash being well Rainbowdash she quickly went nose to nose with the guard questioning him as to where his queen might have gone.

(bug pony guard)  our queen would never run from a fight she is the most beautiful and deadly changeling of them all.  You should be lucky she’s even wasting her time helping you after all you are nowhere near deserving of her power.  The guards comments were not taken well by Rainbowdash however his comments seemed a little bit intentional in that way.  As I attempted to warn Rainbowdash of the tomfoolery I foresaw what with my vast experience of trolling she lung head first at the guard.

Just as she was about to tackle him to the ground his horn grew twice it’s a length along with his legs neck and wings.  Now standing in the way of Rainbowdash as attack was the queen bug pony herself.  Taking advantage of Rainbowdash a surprise she grabbed her forced her mouth open and planted the second most slimy loud and revolting kiss I’d ever seen on the poor rainbow main pony. I of course burst out laughing as Rainbowdash fell paralyzed to the floor.

(chrysalis)  ha ha ha do not worry twilight sparkle though I cannot guarantee you that I change my ways I will help you save our world and save the one I’ve come to grow in love.  She then began to sniff the air speaking of which I think there’s a group of ponies here to say farewell to us.

Chrysalis was right in walking from the giant door which separated this room from the hallway walked an assortment of ponies I both knew and did not know.  Three of them was obviously the sisters and obsessed fan club girl to three of the ponies that I’d know.  Apple bloom being the sister of apple jack sweetie bell being the sister of rarity and Scootaloo who was quite literally in the process of worshiping the one known as Rainbowdash.

But of course the parade of relatives and close acquaintance did not end there.  Luna cadence and shining armor all walked in to say goodbye and good luck.  In addition to that was most of the apple family twilight parents and a larger assortment of ponies one could not even begin to describe.  Despite my inability to comprehend the number of ponies now in the room my eyes locked on to a rather large fluffy one who was now talking to chrysalis.  By talking I mean well…  I don’t know how to describe it.  Nonetheless they were both about to engage in a very close hug when the fluffy pony stopped and pointed to a small amount of slime leaking out of one of the holes on chrysalis is legs.

Chrysalis looking as if she’d been scolded for dragging mud into the house did a motion most familiar to all living creatures.  Much like when you have a runny nose or a cold she plugged up both nostrils and gave a strong inhale.  The result of all the slime on her body being pulled back inside and disappearing.   Seem this action I quickly walked up and spoke with a great deal of frustration in my voice.

(troll)  wait one moment!  You mean to tell me at any point in time you could’ve sucked all that nasty stuff back into your body?  To my question chrysalis nodded her head.  Then why is it every time you’re around me I end up getting covered in the nasty stuff?

Chrysalis only began to laugh.  Because troll the slime is how I’m Marc my territory that an increase is my ability to sense certain things.  I try to get it all over you so that no other changeling can possibly mine control you even though you seem very resilient to that.  As for why I put it away when I’m around as fluffl puff is that I do not intend to turn her into my personal pet.  She is my equal not just a plaything to be violated.

My mouth dropped open and I was about to protest that I was none of those things either but as the bug pony disappeared into the bright pink fluff of the other pony I gave up and walked on to see what luna and Celestia were talking about.

As I walked up I notice luna was protesting against taking over Celestica his job even if for a moment.

(luna) at the and I’m still not certain if I can do this sister I have only just recently mastered the new way ponies speak.  I do not know if I’ll be sufficient in my ability to lead them especially in these uncertain times.

Please sister calm yourself I have ruled the lands for 1000 years and I’m certain you are fully capable of doing so as well.  Though I must remind you to keep an extra close eye on the sun’s motions and during the late hours that’s typically when it tends to drift a bit to the south.

They both then ended their conversation to glance at me.  Troll luna blushed in consideration of our slight encounter I’ve decided that when you return we must set aside some time to get to know each other.

It’s strange normally Id avoid this pony a cost considering their last encounter ended with me swallowing well…  Let’s just say their last encounter didn’t very well.  But nonetheless had become desensitized and a bit more observant to this pony worlds ways and I’m becoming quite confident I can avoid whenever danger a social encounter with the princess the night may entail.  I was saying my goodbyes to princess luna as she walked off to speak with fluttershy it was then I noticed the three ponies I’ve come to know as the cutie mark crusaders seem to be hailing me over.

Journeying over to their location I noticed in not only there strange choice of matching capes but that fourth member of the group was now present.  The small blank flank as they’re called was brown with red and bleacher red hair stripes.  She also had green eyes and accent which I’d never heard before in my life.  As I lowered myself to their eye level they all greeted me and introduced the mysterious fourth member.

(Scootaloo)  hi troll we want to say goodbye and show you the fourth member of the cutie mark crusaders.  Her name is Babs seed and she is apple blooms cousin.  The flightless pony said as she pointed to the fourth member.

(babs seed)  it’s nice to meet you when you guys come back you think you can spend some time with the CMC?  I think I’ll still be in town by then.

I was going to say I was unsure as for all I know the voyage into our world could last months but then it struck me I looked deep into the hypnotic eyes before the adorable little ponies.  Throw in the fact they’re all wearing matching capes and you have something I’m completely powerless against.  Of course I declared maybe I’ll show you how to make a castle of cobblestone.  The four ponies got excited and olive now was enjoying the attention so I thought of a way to entertain them even further.

Now the jump and place is a move learned by all heroes typically as to be taught to you but there are many heroes who discover it on their own.  It is a simple move because average jumped height is about one and 1/16 blocks this means if you jump out in the air.  Then quickly place a block below you, you will now be standing on top of that placed block.  This technique is normally used by mountain climbers.  I should also point out that this is a very wasteful method for scaling cliffs as all the material used is then it added to the side of the mountain thereby making it bigger causing huge waste more material on it the next trip. But I don’t think I have to worry about that in the middle of cantor lot castle.

I now looked down at the four ponies I was standing on a stack of two cobblestone blocks.  The four Phillies made all sorts of noises in wonderment but I was not done yet.  You see though gravity may work in this world differently but I’m not from this world therefore it can take some time for the information to catch up.  Whipping out my pickax I broke the block at the bottom of the stack causing it to disappear.  When I left behind was a floating cobblestone block that I preceded to decorate with torches.

(sweetie bell)  that’s amazing!  The little pony shouted unfortunately this caused her voice to crack sending a painful residence frequency deep into my ear drum.

(apple bloom)  well troll if you ever get tired of fighting monsters you can always go into show business.

I was right about to respond to the little pony when I heard a scolding noise come from behind me.

(twilight)   troll!  What did I say about doing things like that?  She said reminded me of an argument we had prior to getting into the nether gate room an argument I’d rather not regaled the details of.  Hey my life is not an open book for you people.

(troll)  twilight you only told me to obey the laws of thermodynamics you said nothing about gravity.  This loud argument cause the rest of the apple family together around me apple jack included.  When I looked at apple jack I know she was carrying a lot of burlap sacks.  What are the bags for I questioned?

(apple jack)  in the these here bags are to collect seeds from your world.  I know we really don’t have time for stuff like that and I’ll be sure not to do it when the time isn’t right but there has been a problem with food you gave us.

A problem I questioned what problem would that be?  As far as I knew the food was delicious and with its fast growing speed and a very small plot of land could produce an entire crop in only a few days.

(granny Smith)  the seeds you planted at the farm grow up way too fast.  We can’t keep up with the pollination of them and the quickly become hybrids of food here in equestria.  While that food may be delicious with each generation of infected we notice a growth time of the marginally longer.  It’ll only be a matter of time before all the things you gave us are just normal old crops.  We know there’s no way to keep up but we can at least take advantage of the opportunity to get more seeds.

It would appear the slower pace lifestyle of the plants here is a dominant recess and trait while the faster paced lifestyle of the plans back in my world is no doubt dominate by way of evolution.  Either way I decided to take the opportunity to speak the rest of the apple family twilight was drowned out amongst the ponies and had given up scolded me over my small rule Bending.

The apple family seem to come in all shapes and sizes primarily earth ponies there seem to be only one unicorn in the bunch and of course one changeling who I met earlier.  So Mr. Seedling I asked any plans on taking over pony vill?

Seedling was about to speak when granny Smith cut him off…  He’d better not have any plans like that or I’ll give him such a tongue lashing the echoes will rattle through his legs for dog’s life.

(seedling)  but granny?  The bug pony protested.  However his Pleas fell on deaf ears as granny Smith was not quite in the listening mode on that particular discussion.

But granny me nothing she declared you’re still in trouble little Mr. Listening to that queen over your own family.

It was then the bug pony herself happened over here the argument and since seedling is one of her subjects was therefore welcome to join.  However I was unable to focus on the conversation as I was currently examining a rather bizarre happenstance and the bug ponies approach.  You see when I’d left chrysalis she had dived headfirst into a fluffl of pony an action though not totally understood or supported by spatial reasoning who was still only somewhat possible.  now she approached us with the seeming opposite of fact engaged.  The sticking out of each one of the holes in her body was a fluffy pink puff of fur no doubt the fluffl puff pony being somewhere in the center.

Yep… I said gazing at the bug pony and with that lets go talk to vinyl scratch.  I obviously decided it would be best to avoid any clashing between the deep mental disturbance center that is chrysalis and the inherent stubbornness of the apple family.

Pinky pie and vinyl were both talking about the various parties they’d taken their cannons to.  Oddly enough the two stories did not differ that greatly and they both ended with the amusement and applause and large group of ponies.  Octavia being of a more refined nature was now posing in various battle stances with a soared I’d given her.  By

(Octavia)  my the swords your people use are so barbaric no offense intended.  The mayor said doing several fighting stances.

On that I shall agree with you actually there is not very much refinement in my world he and skill is more about brutality and overpowering ones me rather than being skillful.  If Mr. Brown were still alive I’m certain you and he would make great company.  I then turned to see vinyl and pinky pie laughing and having a good time.  So tell me I asked Octavia you’re clearly a higher class why is it exactly are risking your life like this?

The gray mare looked at me without a moment’s haste we now quickly stood sword too sword.  Why defending equestrian should be the duty of all the queen’s subjects not just the ruffians like vinyl scratch.  Besides despite my roommates inability to… well thank.  I would never forgive myself should something happen to her on one of her little adventures.

We did one are two motions as if we’re actually fighting for a moment but it was when the two of her sword hit my armor that are new conversation was struck.  Well I wouldn’t really say was a was conversation.  We’re both attempting to perform the motions of a good sporting fight when we’re all knocked back by a blast from vinyl’s base cannon.

(Octavia)  vinyl she scolded can’t I turn my eyes a few for one moment that you breaking something?  To this the white DJ mayor did several motions as if rolling her eyes hard to tell which is wearing glasses.  Hey the pony protested I didn’t break anything see…  She said pointing to me.  The only thing out of places old square head is now stuck upside down.  The unfortunately for me was a true statement somehow the blast said knocked me square on to my head and seeing is the top of my head is flat there I remained.

As I looked up or down in my case I saw twilight hugging her family good buy looking around the room I noticed similar encounters no doubt we’re getting ready to leave.  Pinky pie despite her bright and cheery nature had a family of varied colors and not so bright rock arson ponies.  Taking a closer look at rarities family I notice she did not grow up in the high class sophisticated household in thought she did in fact her parents looking like they’re more of on vacation.  It was this happenstance that may mean rather curious as to the parents of twilight sparkle.  If the current trend holds true I would say twilight parents are a bunch of party addicted slackers.  A group of people that I can most certainly get along with.

Jumping off the top of my head I quickly made over to twilight’s family where I was met by twilight’s immediate family of shining armor and her mother and father.  Unfortunately the train did not hold true as though twilight’s family were not of any particular high education such as twilight is there clearly not the laidback ponies I imagine in my mind nonetheless I figure I should make good impression.

(troll)  what’s up?  Unfortunately this simple greeting from my world was met with every pony in the immediate area gazing courts the ceiling.  Culture difference I shouted correcting twilight immediately but leaving her family confused.  Hello again as twilight’s farther finally brought his eyes back down from the ceiling.

(Mr. Sparkle)  well the gentleman said you’re Mr. Troll bridge.  Twilight has told was much about you of course we didn ever expect to actually meet you specially and the circumstances of well…  The man troll off as his wife came over and finished his statement.  What my husband means to say is it’s nice to meet someone so close to my daughter.

Twilight’s parents had several strange questions to ask me.  They wanted to know about a strange partnership ritual called marriage.  I’d never heard of such a concept before but it had something to do with raising children O no doubt have to ask a villager about it some time.  A villager seems like he’d know more about this world than anyone seeing as in many ways they fit right in here and pony universe.

The two ponies kept talking on about strange things I didn’t understand when an even stranger events happened the two ponies are questioning how I was to wear a rain without a horn?  Before I could tell them I have fingers and red face twilight somehow gained strength of big Macintosh and quite literally scooped me up off the ground. Using her magic she levitated me the rest of the way to the nether portal.

I turnaround to ask further questions about the ceremony twilight’s parents were talking about but twilight silenced me.  Rather than hearing me out she announced every pony that they should say their goodbyes and joiners of the portals entrance.  Allowing some confusion to overwhelm me and allowing the gravity of the situation to take me I lost sight of twilight’s parents and focused on the task at hand.

After a quick check list that twilight seemed rushed through for some reason she announced that I should be the first one through the portal.  As I stuck my hand into the event horizon I was able to confirm that this portal would definitely take us to the nether.  Looking over I noticed fluttershy was carrying a small metal box and speaking gently to the contents inside.  No doubt it was the magma cubes and considering her kind and gentle nature she was attempting to put it back into its natural habitat.

Well I said to myself looks like there’s nothing to do but go taking a deep breath I stepped into the nether…

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leaving behind the teary eyes and waves of goodbyes from all the ponies I stepped out into a tavern.  The walls were made of cobblestone and the floors were made of sandstone.  The bar was empty and I could sense no movement are living creature with and it’s empty rooms.  But stepping aside to make way a parade of ponies walked through.  The first being the princess accompanied by twilight.  Next was Rainbowdash, vinyl, Octavia, Applejack, rarity, and so on…

Soon enough we were all standing inside of the square diner like tavern that I did not recognize the lighting was soft and easy on the eyes and the room was so quiet you could hear even the sound of someone picking up an item.  Well I said to every pony…  Welcome to hell.

Troll's Secret

We all now stood in a sleepy tavern the bar was completely bare and save one potted mushroom sitting slightly askew from a dispenser that delivers sweet mushroom soup at the push a button.  The tables and booths and chairs said abandoned an unused though the thresher was made of wood the entire structure seems be made of brick cobblestone and nether brick.  Following basic building code for the nether the walls were probably two blocks thick as is the necessary arrangement considering the dangerous nature of this part of the world.  The blast shields were closed over the windows no doubt the tavern was vacated during some form of attack.

As I looked the ponies now at my ring some paintings on the wall I spoke in an evil demonic voice with the intent to scare them.  Welcome I said to hell.  Where fires burn level flows like Rivers in the air itself seeks to seal your doom.  Despite my dramatic posing and even going so far as to step on a table the ponies seemed rather unmoved.  They glanced around at the sleepy tavern and looked back at me.

(vinyl)  um I’d hate to kill the mood there square head but there’s nothing scary about this place.  Heck the rave parties I throw or scarier than this.

But I looked around and two rather unconvinced ponies and smiled for now that I’m standing on a table I have easy access to one of the levers that controls the blast shields over the windows.  Reaching out and grabbing with levers I preceded to say really in a most sarcastic tone.  Then why not take a look at this.  I said pulling that lever and allowing the window to open.

As the windows opened the entire room was based in red light in the outside can be seen clear as day.  The tavern sat on the edge of a cliff far below it sealable from the window was an endless ocean of lava above that was a ceiling of red angry looking stone and the occasional island which contradict sharply from the sea was bathed in lava from the ceiling and burned with fire.  Glow stone decorated the landscape like a starry night sky and all along the coastline or mining tunnels used to look for nether quarts.  The beaches covered in Seoul sand and gravel carry the weight of several cobblestone boardwalks laid there for fast travel across the coastline.

As I turned back around to gaze of ponies I was met with a bizarre site all of them were now standing idle together pupils dilated down to the smallest cubes in measurement and their mouse hung wide open like pinky pie after birthday cake.  The only pony unfazed by the site seems to be the princess was now paying attention to fluttershy small metal box apparently the mob inside was glad the whole.

Fluttershy taking notice of the creatures rambunctious nature opened up the box and allowed it to hop around the room.  Troll?  She asked as he going to be OK out here?  I nodded in and approval and explained that most men cubes live deep beneath the sea of lava.  After words I quickly open the door and allow the cube to explore out word off into the distance.  Well at least until it jumped off the cliff into the lava blow.  Flutter shy began to shriek but I reassured her the queue would be fine.

OK every pony I said gathering them all up there some rules for the nether that are very different from the rules in the mainland.  Every pony have a seat and I will explain them to you briefly.  As I said this a familiar voice asked a brief question.

(spike) should I be writing this stuff down?  I looked down to see a small purple dragon with a quill and paper.

Wait I asked when did you get here?  Spike only rolled his eyes and explained that he had been here the entire time as it would turn out being shorter than the ponies who are shorter than me means that it is very difficult for me to notice him my mind was then left to wander all the places spike could’ve been without my knowledge of him being there hopefully he would have the common decency to not ventured to the bathroom whilst I was occupying it.  A notion I cannot expect the same of chrysalis however luckily for me she is the same size the princess which makes it very easy to spot her.

i then answered spike telling him there’s no need to write anything down the rules of the nether were simple.  As I then explained.  It simple every pony this place use to be a very dangerous but so long as you follow a few simple rules you can make it through this place alive.

Rule one carry plenty of these I said jumping behind the counter. In every house and building or utility shed is a large supply of fire resistant potions this is because the nether is full of lava and there’s no way you can survive it without a potion.

Rule two never ever step on a gravel here in the nether there can be large portions of gravel stop to the site of a mountain they have not yet fallen in any disturbance could send them over the edge.  This goes the same for Seoul sand although it cannot fall you tend to sink down in it and believe me you wanna stay mobile.

Rule three is cover.  No matter where you go a matter what you do make sure there’s some ditch is or caves or something for you to run into if you see a cloud.  For you see those are not clouds them all called ghast.  If you thought creepers were bad wait until you get a low of those.

Finally a zombie pig man.  Zombie pig man are mobs but their neutral which means they will attack you unless provoked and believe me it’s not good to provoke one.

There are few other rules but for the most part I think you guys can handle it now ever pony let’s go I said as I walk to the door to fly open I then this time ventured out word through it into the unknown.  This is when my attitude quickly changed.  For was not the site of the nether that bothered me for a very rarely got to see it but the smell.  Let’s just say the smell was the only thing to remind me where I was oh so long ago.  It reminded me of the secret a secret I’ve kept from the ponies from my newly made friends and from anyone who didn’t already know what it was… even you.

I hope nothing would bring it up and I have a feeling that I will not be so lucky.

As a stop for my little emotional moment the ponies gathered around to stare over the Cliffside at the boiling seas around us they then gotten closer look at the ceiling.  Much of their surprise I was telling the truth the nether is enclosed environment no sunlight no outside influence whatsoever it’s just us in this desolate wasteland.

It was when my mind snapped back into it that I heard the princess complaining.  At plucking back I noticed the princess was only halfway through the door the princess being much larger than myself was now stuck in the doorway the royal flank being too big to fit all the way through.

(princess)  troll I understand your people are all the exact same size but must you make your doors in this manner as well?  She said attempting to pull free from confinement of the doorway.

Twilight and spike quickly went in to obedient servant mode asking the princess if she needed anything and looking to me desperately for a solution.  The princess the whole time was busy reassuring them that it was quite all right.  I then use my newfound powers to pop inside behind the princess.  Surveying the situation I figure the problem be solved with brute force.

(troll)  get ready every pony here she comes I said backing up to get ready for push.  Giving a small burst of speed and from not very far back I tackled into the princess’s hind quarters.  I found myself against the wall of softness and I sank in two her fur like a pillow.

Did you push yet the princess asked?  Troll the princess encouraged in case you haven’t noticed on quite a bit bigger than you.  If you keep pedaling me gently I’m never going to be freed.  Agreeing with the princess and I took a few extra steps back charging headfirst I lunged at the princess then just before I hit I didn’t move reminiscent to when I first enter the pony world and belly flop against her.  Unfortunately for me it is at this time that laws of physics must intervene with my action.  And for this let me explain for every action there’s an equal and opposite reaction this law is prevalent throughout the entire universe.  An arrow can only be fired from a bow because the bow has the added weight of the holder if the air out to the bow was an equal weight to the bow and holder and the aero can only travel be equal distance traveled by them and shooting it once shot.

Needless to say the princess’s greater weight and generous proportions the backside were more than enough to bounce me straight off and fling me somewhere across the room.  As I recovered from my little airborne adventures I remember where I was.  Wait a minute I set out loud this is my world.  With very little effort I quickly punched a hole in the offending wall that had the princess captured.  Here you go princess I said allowing her to continue on forward.  She tilted her head and thanks and I stopped to look at all the ponies now gathered outside the tavern.

Spike was currently very busy fanning rarity asked where he secured a fan with not only a gold handle but a noticeable picture of rarities face on it I blame unicorn magic.  Now that I think about it I believe acne an excuse for anything that goes wrong in my life or doesn’t make sense.  I blame unicorn magic trademark troll bridge.

(Octavia)  troll can’t we go straight onto whenever world we have to save this notch character from?  It’s so hot here?  the pony said desperately trying to cool off by fanning a hoof towards her face.

Sorry Octavia I said to be gray mare notch told me explicitly to rescue any one still alive in the nether and take them back with me to meet up with this virus were holed up in the end.  As much as I agree with you that this place is not one I’d go to fore vacation even I know better than to defy the word notch.

I then looked back of the tavern to notice the taverns name it was a building and heard of many times in my…  Well my time spent in the nether.  I knew the town that had to lie close nearby but I am unfortunately did not know much about the landscape.  All my time was spent indoors and I very rarely got to look out at the lava filled scenery.  Rainbowdash I yield up above can you please go ahead on the main road and tell me if there’s a large funnel leading into the mountainside?

Twilight nodded her head in agreement and Rainbowdash quickly so did the princess before venturing off into the distance.  As we waited for Rainbowdash to return the smells of the nether were getting to me once more filling my head with old memories ones I thought I’d left behind.

(pinky)  troll pinky snapped me out of it are you OK?

As I looked to the pink adorable pony I’ve found myself at a loss for words.  What I asked?  Uuuumm… yeah I’m OK why you ask?  “Because pinky pie remarked you’re standing in fire.”

Rainbowdash returned to the site of me trying to put out my leg with a sand block believe me this is not as effective as you might think.  It’s times like this I wish I was back the pony world.

(Rainbowdash)  um troll there’s a large tunnel of the head it says…  The pony then got embarrassed well it says something.

I immediately knew what she is trying to say and finished her sentence it’s the Satan’s sphincter mining town isn’t it?  Vinyl burst about laughing when I said it.  I have heard many times of the mining town.  It sat on a very large rich vein of quartz.  When the mine ran out of its beautiful and precious commodity the miners found a new job.  The new gaping and giant hole in the enclosed area was well protected making a perfect spot two mine nether rack and they get into bricks.  The resulting bricks sold for a high price back in the normal world.

As we began walking twilight vinyl and Rainbowdash took the front.  Chrysalis and other ponies were in the middle and I took the rear as I was far too preoccupied with the thought swimming in my head to pick up the pace.  I knew what building laid so close to the town and I hoped nothing would come of it.

I thought patterns were then again are opted by a concern pony this time was the princess.  She did not need to say anything a wing around my shoulder was all it took to start a conversation.

(troll)  princess I asked have you ever done something you regretted?  The princess was silence for a moment then answered my question.

(princess ) “yes troll I have.  I’ve made both decisions I was proud of and decisions I’m ashamed of.  Some decisions were for the good of ponies other than myself and even some decisions put value on the lives of some ponies over others.  These decisions are very hard and they sometimes weigh heavy on my heart.”

Her words did nothing to suit my thoughts for was not a decision I was regretting but a careless action.  That was not what I meant princess have you ever physically done something you’re ashamed of?

The princess stared at me further and then spoke in a manner pressing a very deep concern for my well-being.  Troll she said this place has awakened something and you what is it that now fills you with such grief?

Grief…   I thought to myself the words stung like hot sword against the flash.  it twisted and wrenched in my brain and searing thoughts from the past dwelled up that word.  So much so that I actually stopped walking.  Every pony save the princess was now halfway through the tunnel before I realized then stopped.

(queen chrysalis)  troll she asked I’m sensing some confusing emotions from you are you OK?

As I snapped back into it I looked forward into the dark tunnel every pony was now steering at me their white eyes shun against the black but insides of the tunnel.  In a attempt to erase the moment from history I shouted look every pony the town is right of the head and quickly charged through the group of ponies.

As I burst and will onto the other side of the mountain I was met with an even greater site.  Nestled between three large mountains was a town protecting the town was three large walls some with large holes in them and they’re made a very cheap material that they went from mountain to mountain and from floor to ceiling like a net.  These were to stop any Ghats from straying too far into town and causing trouble.

Near the town were several lakes of fire and lava and the town itself was made of fireproof buildings.  Unfortunately there were no people walking the streets and it could not be blamed on the time of day for there was no there night in the nether.  Every pony I shouted spread out and look for survivors.  I knew the faster we found someone the better off we would be.  The sooner I be out of the nether.

But my search was not from four of them I went through large industrial furnace rooms and community crafting stations even some personal homes Baird no fruit in the form of life.  This trend continued for every pony and myself several times over before finally I heard a voice call my name.

(apple jack) but troll she shouted over there look.

I quickly ran through the buildings to find her and when I did she was pointing off into the distance for outside of town was a figure walking by one of the shorelines.  Stay here every pony I said we don’t wanna scare whoever is and I imagine the site of you ponies is enough to stop anyone’s heart…  No offense.

Walking up to the man I was disappointed not to find a hero surviving in another but a zombie pig man relaxing In the hot lava.

(zombie pig man)  hero! Whats up dude…  oink

I gave a great sign a disappointment and shouted to the ponies that they could approach.  I don’t know why but first I did not think the zombie pig man or the other by the site of the ponies.  But I was quickly proven wrong as the moment the mob laid eyes on twilight sparkle he began screaming frantically.

(the zombie pig man)  what is that thing?  Oink  he screamed as he quickly jumped from lava and pulled out his sword.

It’s cool Z.P man I said trying to calm him just chill out.  These are ponies there from another world beyond that of the one I come from just stay calm.  They’re not going to hurt you.  I said calmly touching the tip of his sword with my hand.

Eventually he put down a soared and looked strangely at me.  “Your armor he said I’ve never seen a hero with that armor before oink.”  Remembering that I was technically not a normal hero anymore I explained to him that notch had spoken to me and gifted me with great power.  Much to my surprise the zombie pig man dropped his sword.  What’s wrong I asked?

you have been touched by the notch the pig man exclaimed I will help you in what every you need.  Needless to say I was quite pleased by his cooperation for a moment I was afraid he would refuse to help me.  Tell me I said are there any heroes within this area?

The pig man looked up.  No when the nether portal stopped working all the heroes tried desperately to find a way out.  Only the surface can supply enough food to keep the very high hero population here alive in their search they awakened something.

I looked confused at the pig man. ”And what of herobrine?”  I asked did herobrine ever come to the nether?  The pig man looked up of me with a great amount of fear in his eyes.  No he said I thought herobrine was simply a legend.

At first the confirmation that herobrine never affect another filled me with hope.  With no undead army to take this world there must be plenty of heroes held up somewhere.  But as I looked around I saw no signs of life.  Some of the buildings had blast damage on them which is not untypical of buildings in the nether but still it looked unusual.  Furthermore the fact that there are no people is the stranger thing.  Even with no access to the normal world and the nether farms should have been more than enough to keep people fed in an emergency rations stored in many public buildings should have also made the transition smooth and competition free.

(twilight)  you said the heroes awakened something what was it?  Twilight asked bravely stepping up to the mob.

The zombie pig man paused for a moment and then reached out his hand to brush one of twilight’s ears.  As soon as he felt he was justified in saying that twilight was indeed real he answered her question.  The withers small one.  In the heroes desperate attempts to escape this place they somehow awoke the ancient mobs known as Withers.  Eventually there were overwhelmed.

(troll)  are there any more heroes anywhere I asked.

He stared at me for a moment as if unsure of what to say.  Finally he spoke I know of only one he said but there’s a story surrounding that one.  I noticed what direction he was looking.  And what tunnel he was suggesting I walked down.  I know the story I said.  Believe me there’s no need to warn me of the danger.

The pig man turned to me with a large degree of speculation.  tell me he asked are you wearing overalls?  At the end of his sentence the ponies gasped apparently there picking up on something.  I hope their suspicions are not to aroused if I can I would like to keep the past buried.

Yes I said I am Troll Bridge.  I imagine you wish not to follow me.

As the pig man looked at me with eyes of fear and anger.  you’re not suggesting freeing that monster are you?  His deeds affected the nether just as much as they affected the surface world you of all people would know that.  The I briefly explained that my loyalty was not the nether and that notch himself ordered all survivors free from this place and seeing is he is the only one who am I to deny that claim.

The pig man bowed his head and began walking through the crowd of ponies away from us.  He stopped for a moment to glance over to the princess’s cutie mark.  Curiosity gripping him he reached out and touched it.  As is hand caught on fire a continued walking away was bring something involving more intimate physical contact with the princess.

(vinyl)  troll what the heck was that all about?  Who is he talking about?  She asked.

I tried my best to articulate the words but nothing came out.  In the end I pointed off into the distance and told the ponies another cavern was this way and that it was what we need to go to.  I knew at this point there’s no way to keep the ponies from learning of my past and but I can think of a way to tell the ponies what secrets they would learn about me soon.

The walk through the long winding tunnel was mostly quiet I could feel that all the ponies were now on edge.  They knew I was hiding something and I knew they try to get out of me, but no one not even Pinky pie dared break the ice.  The ponies now walked far behind even though I was walking rather slowly the ponies clearly did not want to overtake me.  But they followed in a deliberate distance.

Not a distance that suggested conviction are just trust but more of respect.  What ever it was I was hiding they’re waiting patiently for me to be able to talk to them about it.  Even though I cannot see her I could feel twilight’s eyes locked on me.  Rainbowdash was even able to contain her normally abrasive nature to not disturb me as I walked.  Eventually the awkward silence gave way to meaningless and petty conversation and most the ponies.  Not about what was bothering me but seem to be it anything that happened pass by such as a mushroom or torch.

The tunnel we walked down was long for purpose it burrowed deep beneath the ocean of lava.  I only walked down the style twice.  And the emotions I felt then were very different than the ones I felt now.  The first time I walk down the tunnel I was gripped with fear regret and self-hatred.  That first time I quite literally walked down this road I was younger.  I was a very different person than I was now and it felt scarring.  Equally scarring was the second time I’ve walked down this road however in the opposite direction.  It was a time of mixed feelings I was hopeful and happy but afraid and cautious.  I knew not know the future held or even if the future would allow me to be inside but either way I continue to walk down the road because there’s nothing else I could do.

Now I walked down this road for third time in all the emotions of the previous journeys are flashing back to me.  I had kept and walked away with in my mind but it would seem some things are inescapable.  As I continue walking and listened to the sounds of my boots against the cobblestone road and felt the hot air of the nether seeping through the nether-rack I fell something very different.  It was soft and in bracing and somehow was very cool to the touch as I looked up it was the princess with a wing around my shoulder.

(princess)  troll I believe we have not finished her talk.  Please know that we’re well outside of your shock from any other pony.  Now tell me why has this place change you so?  And who is this person who we are going to go meet?  The princess asked pulling me and closer to her form.

I thought of many different approaches I could take to answering questions it would seem my more devious mind is overridden in times like this and honesty shines true however it is a selected honesty.  We’re going to go meet a man named greed Fingers 666.  However everyone simply calls him Griefer.  As for why this place bothers me so much let’s just say it I fell victim to a small difference in our culture’s.

(princess)  what do you mean troll she asked.

Well I explained it while ago and learn that you ponies measure time in years this is not how we measure time for we measured in days gone are then translated into years.  As I said this the princess looked confused.  There is no day or night in the nether I explained their four if you spend time in the nether it is marked off your actual age and because of actual age bears no relevance for persons lifelong longevity any time spent in the nether can be marked off your life span with no worry of dying young.  My friend Pone was eight years old when he died I was five years old when you found me and both me and Pone spawned at almost the exact same time.

The princess paused for a moment.  We walked on for a few steps only the sound of cobblestone beneath her feet and hooves filling in the emptiness.  So she asked where exactly did those three years go?  Two her question I said nothing I merely allowed our journey to continue forward and until finally the spiral walkway that seem to stretch and giant circle forever gave way into a giant open room.

The room was quite clearly met and made.  The bubble was section of one through two sections in the middle or closer to the bottom was a glass for flooring and beneath that was boiling bubbling lava.  But within the glasses ground level were cobblestone streets and such but each road led up to the same thing in the center of the bubble a very large vary from voting castle.  Much like cantor lot castle it had high guard towers and foreboding impenetrable walls with the occasional lava flow coming out the side.  Unlike cantor lot the color palette was not of and cheery and welcoming nature but more of one that demanded solitude.

(twilight)  troll what is this place twilight asked gazing forward and onto the giant castle.

As we walked on I answer her question.  This I said is Hell Stone Prison.  I spent three years of my life in this place…

End of chapter 13

Trolls Story

As I gaze upward to the place the denied me my freedom so long ago I felt a certain sense of despair.  Of course this is the usual feeling for when confronting an element of your past and it affected me very little to see the old place once again.  The thing that had a slightly larger effect on me was the notion; I have to explain to the ponies as to why I’d spent three years of my life locked away beneath the surface of hell itself.

I couldn’t look back towards them so I merely continue forward along the cobblestone path.  Normally there should be at least six and guards stationed in small guard towers on the perimeter of the wall.  However looking up I saw there were none.  Without guards to sound the alarm no one would hear our request to enter.  ‘hello?’ I said banging on the door.  The door itself was iron.  Though iron doors do a great job of slowing things down they do not do so good a job at stopping them completely.  However the prison head of this rather than one set of iron doors there were fourteen.  Only by pulling a red stone lever deep inside the prison can you release all the doors.

I looked high above hopefully there should be an easier way in from above it is not often you see creatures that can fly invading the prison especially with the prison’s location deep beneath the lava.  Biting my lip I was forced to come with terms by that I would have two of turnaround eventually.  Talking was last thing I wanted to do this aspect of myself I’ve managed very so deep in the ground even I’d forgotten about it by wool but now he’s back in my shame drives me to run away from it.

But it would seem more powerful forces are insisting I confronted with a deep breath I turnaround sure enough the ponies were now steering at me with many different glances some of confusion some of denial even more I think just maybe anger and it hurt.  With a shaky breath ask Rainbowdash she could find a way in from above.  What I asked are she finally from Brea from are frozen stare at me and became more animated finally regaining the ability to fly but not choosing a destination overhead rather she flew up straight words me.

‘Hang on troll she said what do you mean you’ve been in this place for three years?  Were you a prisoner here?  And what did you do?’  The assortment of questions she asked could have easily been answered in one simple story but it is not one I wish to tell.  Finding myself not being able to speak I turned my head slightly away from all. ‘look I said it’s not important please just go up and find us away in.’

Rainbowdash was not convinced and almost as if and protesting manner she sat down winner hunches creating a large bump against the glass surface.  "No," she protested "I want to know why you are acting so strange and what is this place?"

This is Hell Stone Prison I said please just help me get inside so we can go.  I guess the others can see how this plays unsettled me besides the princess.

(rarity)  darling if you just tell us why this place makes you feel this way we can trust you to…  At the word trust she sharply covered her own mouth.

(apple jack)  will rarities trying to say is that if this place makes you remember sup that you did why don’t you just tell us.  I’m certain you’ve done your time but you can’t change the past so go on?  What did you do?

I looked around all their faces even the princess seemed poised to know right then and there what I’d done to get me locked up and this place, but as hard as I tried I just didn’t want them to know.  I’m well aware that no matter what I do they will find out eventually however I would rather it be later than sooner.

(chrysalis)  ‘I knew there was a reason I liked you.  Go on bad boy let’s hear what you’ve done.’  As chrysalis walked up beside me I decided I could bear it no longer doing something slightly risking I use my powers and transported straight to the other side of the 14 iron doors blocking our path.

Once inside I was alone this place filled me with no real memories as I actually did not get to walk around the various courtyards and facilities like the other prisoners.  My entrance into the prison was soon met with a flash of purple light I recognize it as Twilight’s own magical abilities.  Looking back the small purple unicorn was now standing right in front of me.  Twilight I said just go back outside I get this guy and we can go.

(twilight)  and exactly what do you think you’re going to do once we have the guy with us.  Do you expect him not to tell us anything?  I couldn’t answer questions I just looked away.  ‘I won’t ask you to tell me what happened troll but I will stay here and listen’

And seeing as there’s nothing I could do to get twilight back outside and stay there I continued on word down the hallways.  It been such a long time I did not know remember the layout of the prison and there’s no way out can memorize it with a brief number of times I walk through the halls that number being only two.  Signs near the hallways told me as to which wings were need to go through.

(twilight)  here she said right here’s the control room for the entire prison and if we go here we should be able to find this person his jail cell.  Agreeing with twilight I looked up at the sign it was not far away.

The quiet walked down the holes was most uneventful and twilight seemed silent but always watching my movements and always very close beside me but the look on her face seem to being only of quiet study not of judgment.  Once inside the control center two the entire prison were greeted with large walls with lit up names on signs.  This system was very similar to that my safety room.  The system was very simple when a prisoner was in his cell and locked up tightly the light was on and win a prisoner was not in his cell delight was off.  This system of course was not foolproof as someone would have to change the light to match the prisoners location.

This system was separated on many walls and the classification vary based on length of time spent in prison.  The largest wall was for prisoners spending only 1 to 2 years of in prison and ex was three for years.  After that was 6 to 10 followed by 15 to 30 roughly and so on increasing to scale.

Twilight walked over to the 3 to 4 year wall.  Now forgive me for saying so troll but I did quite a bit of research on your world mainly for fun you honestly can expect me to stay away from that many books for so long especially with a one block in the middle giving me such quick and easy access to all of them.  Now if I’m right the nature of your people said that once a prisoner has a cell that sell remains his forever though put you back in it if you come back to prison so your name should still be on this wall.

As twilight began scanning the names I felt then a small way I could tell her at least something.  No I said I was released after three years that was not my original sentence.  As I began walking twilight quickly followed.  And as we walked the size of the red stone charge boards showing the names of all the prisoners began to shrank smaller as it is more uncommon for heroes to get longer sentence.  We passed the largest board with all the names not lit up then we passed a slightly smaller board with all the names not lit up.  Continuously we do this until we arrived aboard very small indeed.  It was so small their only 6 to 7 names on it one of those names was against a glowing block of light the from the red stone.  The sign next to it however was the one twilight was a fixated on.

In big bold letters that said mine named troll bridge cell number five.  She looked up to see a sign proclaiming on the board as to how long the prisoners would stay at within their cells.  It was not as sophisticated and I’m sure of years but nearly one word.  The word spelled out in all capital letters.

“FOREVER”

It was the one thing that was able to shake twilight she no longer was able to look at me with the same distinguished understanding as for now she was equally curious and afraid as everyone else was.  I couldn’t look at her but I can still talk.  I told you I said I only staying here for three years but it was intended for me never to leave.  I quickly located the whereabouts of my old cell there’s no doubt man we are looking for would be held nearby it.  Pulling several levers I assure but would not have to have deal with any checkpoints.

As we walked twilight was not so silent.  ‘Where did all the prisoners go she asked?’  To her question I explained that if there was truly no hope of leaving the nether and were fighting a horrible enemy as the zombie pig man described are they probably allowed all the people to leave.  Grefer being the one exception.

We now stood in the wing of the building that held prisoners with the forever label.  Though I could see grefer a cell somewhat often the distance my cell was much closer and though I did not want to I felt compelled to revisit.  In the control booth I am locked the first level of security for it the second was a simple matter of a few switches which in turn triggered some alarms back of the control booth but worry relevant with no guards to respond to them.

Is this your cell twilight asked.  ‘Yes I said’

As we walked past the first level security I flips and switches and I could hear the grinding of pistons onward ahead soon the wall opened up and there’s now a sand bridge that had just arisen a small pond of lava.  In the center and was an island made of simple smooth stone.  The door on it was iron and has small lever above it or the occupant could not reach.

I felt the need to walk into my old cell twilight sharply following the inside was a long vertical shaft above me that once a day would dispense food and was a trapdoor which…  I believe you know it’s functions.  For those two objected to their sentence it would be possible for them to simply jump through that trap door and ended all why falling into lava.

The owner other furnishings of the room was a bed of put in the corner I sat down and stared at the dark boring room.  This I told twilight is the place I was supposed to spend all eternity in.  Whilst it is true of my people have very short lives. That is due to the danger of the world in which we live.  But for those select few it is possible to live forever in this place all alone.  It is part of the punishment at once the cell is sealed no one is to never disturb it again unless absolutely necessary.

This is why the nether bothers me so bad the smell of it brings back the memories of me sitting here all alone thinking I had an eternity of nothing but myself to keep me company.  Twilight seems shocked by my explanation but she was still very obviously more concerned with what I’d done in the first place to get me locked up in here.  As she hopped up onto the bed she can tell I was beginning to lose my composure.  In a flash of purple light she was now sitting right next to me on each hoof I noticed she was wearing a familiar pair of socks.  As she climbed into my lap I noted that the nether had obviously worked its temperature on the pour pony making her sweat profusely however when you need a shoulder to cry on you don’t exactly stop to smell the roses.

I could take the pressure no longer picking up twilight I swiftly curled up with her beneath the blanket and began telling my story softly in her ear.

*flash back*

Deep in the middle of the desert was the village where I lived.  As of currently bore no name and was very small.  Other than the villagers small and modest accommodations the only real building around was my home it was made completely of cobblestone and sandstone.  It was modest and square with not much in the way it looks.  But the place where I lived would one day be renamed as troll bridge city but for now it was a simple never travel through villager village.  I walked along the gravel roads.  There not yet been enough villagers for iron golem to spawn in fact I didn’t even know what an iron golem was.  I was still very young and my friend Pone had grew bored of the dry and hot landscape.

He then went off to build his own home.  Luckily despite the deserts well lit nature mobs still did spawn and though I had not much food to give him on his travel I was able to stock him up with plenty of bone meal it promised that on the day he builds his home here and bible to it.  I thought about setting off from this place and risking it all to find my fortune but the knowledge that no heroes seem to want to climb this land drill and even hard are to find something worthwhile within its boundaries.

Overtime the villagers became disgruntled though they’re glad he I killed off the mobs which threatened their lives were they now have a population far too high he to fit inside the six or seven structures made for them.  Because heroes were the only ones the save that of Enderman, who could move blocks it was asked of me that I make some new homes for the villagers who live here.  Quickly I sent to work and bill several modest homes that were very space efficient and close together and well protected.

It was later on that night that a villager and explain to me that with a new population and mighty iron golem may spawn.  I asked the man as to why this concerned me?  Explain to the village was grateful.  My services allow them to increase their population and grow their village significantly faster than normal.  He told me that the bodies of iron golem could be scrapped for iron bars these iron bars are needed for railways armor and weapons and he said I found by fortune.  And the more villagers them or iron golem would spawn.

I agreed with him and with the addition of several new homes children were soon born and with them some of iron golem.  But of it was then I finally found my fortune.  I put many advertisements out to commonly traveled hero visited businesses.  It was simple advertise that I had an unlimited source of iron and that I would be happy to bargain for the bars.  Because I got the bars for free I decided it would be best to not make most of my profit off of them.  I was very fair and gave when my customers a great deal and this of drove the popularity of my little village far up.  Many heroes visited and making true my namesake I had fun pulling pranks on some of them.  Using iron doors and push plates I would trap some of an inconvenience others.  My jokes were met was some iron compensation and a few laughs shared over a drink.

No one at the time thought my jokes were harmful in fact they quite enjoyed them.  And one of the attractions to my city was how to get to it without falling into one of my well laid trolls.  At the end of each day I would count the currency my village had earned me and it was not long before I was forced to connect my little village with the rails allowing visitors to come and buy large quantities of iron.  It was not long after that that Pone had grew his own tree house a large and magnificent structure which stretched higher than any man troll growing tree.  Though my villager population was high in the village was nowhere near that of a hero population which visited each day to try and get their own share of iron.

However one day I met someone who would change the reputation of my fair little village.  His name was Grefer.  Actually Grefer was his nickname a name he earned an all the places he left behind him to anyone who did not yet know him his name was greed fingers 666.  The man was similar to me and he played jokes and taunted other people.  However his jokes seemed more insulting then playful.  As he pushed several heroes into one of my booby traps he turned about 180°you show them a rather unique trait about his skin.

His skin at first glance seemed rather normal he was not a mob or any form of unsavory creature he wore plain black shirt with a small square design on the front however his pants which were red and green and a small flap in the back of them and with the and buckling of two small buttons he could clearly show any victims to his jokes his most prized full Moon.  As this man walked first into my shop I thought nothing much of him.  I merely asked blocks or bars.  You can really tell a lot about a hero by their choice of blocks or bars.

Iron block consists of nine of iron bars Milton together into a block it take some work to free the bars and use them for crafting however you can use blocks to build with and they’re much more efficient for storage.  Bars and a more convenient for crafting however they do take up a lot of inventory space and it would be best if they were smelted into blocks.  I find that those that ask for blocks rather than bars are very serious.  They normally buy large loads at a time and are using them for some industrial use such as a large piston based factory or something.  Those the purges bars of or normally more lighthearted and by smaller loads sporadically throughout their visits.  The bars are quickly shielded down into armor swords are other useful items.

Grefer as I come to know him now did not tell me his name or the number of iron bars or blocks needed rather he only asked if I wanted to pull a very interesting prank on a far off city.  Thinking back then that crimes can only be done and joking and playful manner I agreed wholeheartedly.  He did not tell me much about the prank he only said he needed iron to make pistons and me to help them with them.

We met many days later at a large hero logging town.  The owner of the town went out every single day to plant large numbers of trees and heroes from all around but come and to chop them down and get one or apples.  The town in which she lived was very called in vertical and sat on top of a small mountain surrounding it was flat grassland that constantly changed as he planted new trees.

In my youth I thought nothing of the suspicious nature of Grefer.  He never allowed anyone to see him and told me to do all the talking.  The owner of the establishment knew me and was happy to trade iron for wood a disguised used for my excuse in being there.  Light during the night as all the heroes slept Grefer and I sent to work.  We planted pistons and dispensers and I filled the dispenser the buckets of water.  I also put pistons beneath the exits so the push a button they would close.  Of my plan or the plan I was told by Grefer was to turn the entire town into one giant cool.  I cannot work to the entire night so Grefer always told me I set everything up during the first half of the night and he would come back in disguise it during the second wall I slept.

The work too many days and I was forced to stop by my village now and again to drop off the large amounts of wood and pick up more iron.  But eventually the work was finished and red stone layed deep beneath the street level of all the buildings and all the walls.

On the day we were to set off the trap Grefer told me there was a complication and we would have to be in two different places to do it properly he outside the city to set off something involving the walls me inside the city to flood the place.  I knew cleanup efforts would take a long time so I packed my inventory full of sand I had no intention of flooding the town without assisting in fixing it.  After all the owner knew me very well and he knew I would never pull pranks such as this without helping to clean up.

As I jumped onto a small platform we had built earlier that night I announced everyone that it was time for a party.  With a flip of a lever I intended to flood the town making the world’s biggest POOL however I made the world’s biggest FOOL.  When I slammed the lever down and pulled it not a single drop of water was outwardly dispensed.  And I became worried as the only thing that seemed to happen was the openings and the walls where people entered and exited the town closed up the clatter of pistons.  As soon realized he as a glowing red light began to fill the streets that Grefer ahead tricked me.  Rather than filling up the dispensers with water buckets he in full them up with fireballs and lava.

Everything happened so fast people were screaming and trying to escape.  Those that ride to go for the exits were blocked off by lava and those that hidden inside the buildings were reminded that Billings are flammable.  I escape by remembering the tunnels filled with red stone we’re laying down the nights before.  Digging them up with my bare hands I broke into one and quickly made my way outside the town.  As I punch my way through the dour side of the mountain I was forced to jump as behind me was a river of lava poised to escape.

As I looked back I saw someone brining to death…

*End of flashback*

I told twilight that the authorities picked me up in the borough remains of the forest crying in a small dirt home I quickly built to save me from the fire.  Grefer was well known for doing these kinds of stunts and I was tried as his accomplice before I knew what was happening I was locked away behind bars.  It took three years for them to discover they Grefer had used several accomplices in such a manner before and I was released and exonerated of my crimes.

As I open my eyes I found their full of tears.  I was crying and I could finally let go of twilight who stared at me was sympathy and sadness.

(twilight)  but troll wasn’t your fault how old were you at the time?  She asked padding me on the back.

I told her I spent my one year birthday inside this place and two that notion she gave me a tight hug.  Twilight wiped my face with a rag she magically made appear and asked.  “are you certain you want to let this man out of prison?”  I nodded my head yes and explained that though Grefer was a terrible fighter has lying of traps and knowledge of red stone made him ideal to go into the mod lands.  The notch was no doubt saving his identity so that I didn’t protest coming to this place in saving him.

At but you’re just a baby back then?  Besides they said one of your fault.

I only shook my head.  It was by the pulled the lever twilight.  Grefer’s never been one to activate his own traps.

Well twilight said helping me out of bed when you’re ready he’s right down the hall.

With twilight’s support I drew strong again and I felt confident in my ability to confront Grefer.  Several levers and doors quickly passed by and soon I’ve finally opened Grefer stage.  Out of the small dark room walked a man in a black shirt with his red and green pants I recognize them all too well.  I had told twilight it down and out of sight as I didn’t want Grefer freaking out from the site of a little round pony.

(Grefer)  has it been forever already he asked.  As he walked out of his cell he spoke in a manner of delightful insanity no doubt driven mad by the loneliness.  When he looked at me he was surprised.  Why it’s troll my old friend he said.  What brings you from all the way next door.

Because it is one of the rules that a person not be talk to after they’d been sealed inside their cell it is very unlikely he knows anything about what happened after he’d been put inside the prison.  Here’s the deal I said to grefer were going a little adventure if you help me I won’t kill you.  If you try to run away I’ll do something a whole lot worse.

(Grefer)  really?  Grefer asked and what exactly can you do to me?  He questioned.

Besides this I said giving him a sharp blow to the face, I can show you my little pony.  Grefer at first looked confused as he wiped his nose of the small amount of blood I drown.  “And exactly what is that supposed to mean?  He asked”.

This I declared picking up twilight like a weapon with her back legs in my right hand and her front legs in my left hand.  I then squeeze her slightly and out popped burst of magic from her horn affectedly making a sleep spell knocking Grefer out cold.

(twilight)  I really wish ponies would stop using me as a weapon.  She said jumping down from my arms.

yeah I agreed but I was hand it to you I said picking up one of Grefer’s legs and began walking down the hallway.  I’d rather have you then a soared any day.  She smiled brightly through the sweat and heat of the nether and as we walked back outside to greet the other ponies I turn to them all and said.  Come on every pony I’ve got a story to tell you.

End of chapter 14