El Presidente Rainbow Dash

by daOtterGuy

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Sex, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rainbow Dash, Other, Comedy, Scootaloo, Adventure, Princess Celestia
Length: 1559

Rainbow Dash has become El Presidente of the Tropico Islands. This will not go well.

[Crossover with Tropico 4]
[Gore and Sex tags used just to be safe as there are several moments that fall under these categories]

Rainbow Dash wakes up and suddenly becomes El Presidente of the Tropico Islands. How will Rainbow Dash deal with her ridiculous ministers, incompetent second-in-command, and a host of ridiculous citizens?

Presumably not well.

Published 2016-05-13 00:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-13 00:00:01 UTC

A Ministry of Dunces

Author's Note

So this is a new story that I've had for a while and decided to finally start doing. Keep in mind you do not have to have played Tropico 4 to enjoy the fic.

Enjoy~

A Ministry of Dunces

Rainbow Dash was in the Canterlot throne room. Celestia’s throne sat prominently within the stone chamber and the sun streaming through the nearby stained glass windows bathed the room in rainbow coloured hues.

None of this was important to Rainbow Dash, however, as the place was swarming with bugs. Changelings to be precise.

“...ente.”

Rainbow Dash gave a nearby Changeling an uppercut to the jaw. Another Changeling behind that one lunged at Rainbow. She pulled her left hoof back and struck it the offending bug in the face. Rainbow Dash grinned maniacally.

“esi..ente…”

Rainbow Dash, still grinning, turned around and came face-to-face to another Changeling that bared its fangs.It lunged for her screaming:

“El Presidente!”

“Wahhh!” Rainbow Dash was startled awake. “Who? What? Where?”

“El Presidente! Are you alright?”

Rainbow Dash turned towards the voice and was puzzled by what she saw. It was a young filly pegasus with an orange coat and purple mane gelled into a peak. She had a military uniform of coat and lapels adorned with various awards. Rainbow Dash found the filly familiar and soon realized why.

“...Scootaloo?”

“Of course El Presidente. Who else, but your most trusted confident would come to wake you up?”

Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Scoots, why would you be in my bedroom, actually how are you in my bedroom?”

“I live here with you in the palace, remember?” Scootaloo tilted her head quizzically, “You said that you always wanted your most trusted confident with you at all times.”

Rainbow Dash blinked, and then realized Scootaloo had said that they lived in a palace. Rainbow Dash then took a moment to take in her surroundings.

She was in a rather utilitarian room. There was only a bed, desk, and dresser. A single window covered with vertical blinds was situated above the bed. Despite the sparse furnishings, the furniture itself was heavily ornate. The bed was a single bed carved from real oak with several intricate designs around the base. The dresser was heavily ornamental with depictions of pegasus in flight. The desk was a gorgeous three tiered oak behemoth with a simple chair to sit on and a leather bound notebook on the desk.

The most notable feature, however, was that nothing was made from clouds. This did, however, explain how Scootaloo was in her room, or what Scootaloo said was her room.

“Scoots, I don’t live here.”

Scootaloo gave Rainbow a blank look, “Sure you do. You did ever since Celestia abdicated the Tropico islands and took over as El Presidente.”

“Wait, WHAT?!”

Scootaloo was taken back by Rainbow Dash’s sudden outburst and was immediately concerned, “El Presidente! You must have hurt yourself if you are confused as to something so simple.”

Rainbow Dash stared blankly at Scootaloo, “Scoots, I really hope you’re not joking right now because this would be pretty twisted.”

Scootaloo seemed offended, “I am shocked and appalled that El Presidente would think I, Scootaloo, could be possible of such a thing.”

At Scootaloo’s seemingly genuine distress, Rainbow Dash just decided to play along for now.”Okay Scoots. sorry, I was just startled badly when I woke up.”

Scootaloo smiled, “It’s not a problem El Presidente, I am very sorry for startling you. Now, we simply must get to the meeting of the ministers. Get dressed and I’ll meet you outside to escort you.”

Rainbow Dash nodded and Scootaloo stepped outside. Rainbow trotted over to the dresser and looked inside the drawers. She was surprised to find the same military uniform worn by Scootaloo, but far simpler She recognized the work of a skilled seamstress and was reminded of Rarity

Rainbow Dash’s mind came to a screeching halt.

Where are my friends?

Rainbow Dash quickly donned the uniform, a pair of sunglasses, and a peak cap. She dashed out the room and encountered Scootaloo.

“Ah, El Presidente, I am glad you are so eager to go to the meeting. Shall we be off?”

“Y-Yeah, Scoots.”

As Scootaloo led Rainbow down several stone corridors decorated with urns, paintings, rugs, and statues of various skill and design, Rainbow Dash kept thinking of her friends.

Realistically she had no idea what’s going on. She woke up in a place that wasn’t her home, met somepony who was and wasn’t Scootaloo, and then was called by a title she had never heard of before that was apparently given to her by Celestia, forcibly.

Not only that, but she had no idea where Twilight, AJ, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie were. This more than anything scared her the most as something terrible could have happened to them and she had no way of knowing if they were okay.

Are they even alive? What if they were killed by a monster because Rainbow wasn’t there to save them? What if they were being held captive against their will as a way to get at Rainbow? What if -

“We have arrived, El Presidente. I shall wait for you out here.”

Rainbow Dash snapped out of her revelry and noticed that Scootaloo had taken her to a large set of wooden doors. They were simple and practical. Rainbow nodded as Scootaloo snapped a quick salute and walked into the room.

She couldn’t make much out except that the room was fairly large, but simple with only the barest hint of furnishings. A round table was situated in the center of the room. There were six chairs and each had a Cutie Mark on them. The lighting was awful as only one harsh, overhead light illuminated the room She could just barely make out five other ponies sitting in the chairs, but she didn’t know who they were.

Deciding that the last chair must be for herself, seeing as how it had her signature rainbow bolt of lightning, she got in and then almost fell off. On the brightside, at least she didn’t need to wonder where her friends were anymore.

To her immediate left was the orange mare Applejack. She wore a peaked military cap, sunglasses, and simple military uniform. Her blonde mane was cut short to frame her face. She sat with her legs crossed and leaning back while smoking a cigar in one corner of her mouth.

Next to Applejack was Rarity. Her hair was styled into a tight bun of curls. She wore a simple business blouse over her white coat and wore a feathered hat on her head that matched her purple mane perfectly. She was currently shaving her hooves with a silver nail file.

Directly across from Rainbow was Pinkie Pie. She also wore a blouse over her pink coat, but with polka dots. Her bubblegum pink mane was still poofy and she wore a handkerchief around her neck. She kept her hooves in front of her and smiled enough to almost split her face in half.

After Pinkie was Twilight. She wore glasses, a blouse over her lavender coat, and a pencil behind her ear. Rainbow Dash was very confused about Twilight’s mane as it was blowing back from her face … with no breeze in the room. She was reading a book in front of her, but still seemed to take in Rainbow’s presence.

Finally there was Fluttershy. She seemed relatively the same except for the business suit, and shortened pink mane. Except she was sharpening knives in front of her.

Rainbow Dash blinked as she tried to process the mares in front of her.

“Um, hello?”

“Hey Dash, nice ta see ya show up after nappin’ the day away,” -Applejack rolled her cigar to the other side of her mouth- “Time to start gatherin’ the army to squash the rebels on the island.”

“Hello, darling,” -Rarity waved one hoof idly in her direction- “I would also like you to know that I have embezzled 5 % of the national budget for my own personal gain to be used to afford more of my select brand hair conditioner.”

“Hiya Dashie,” -Pinkie waved enthusiastically- “, Are you ready to enact my super duper awesome plan to take over the world through party cannons?”

“Ah, Rainbow!” Twilight groaned, “It’s so good of you to show up. I was beginning to worry that you would never get here, and I can’t start our special education plan without you present.”

Fluttershy continued to sharpen her knives and grinned warmly at Rainbow.

This was the final breaking point for Rainbow. She screamed and then flew out of the room. Literally.

Rainbow flew down the hall and through the nearest window, shattering the glass in the process. She landed quickly amongst a throng of very startled ponies.

Rainbow breathed heavily to get herself back under control. She heard a click. Rainbow looked up into the face of a blue unicorn with ice blue mane with a small metal contraption in her mouth.

“Excellent to see you Presidente,” the pony Rainbow recognized as Lyra said, “I don’t mean to be rude, but it’s time for you and me to finally say goodbye.”

Rainbow Dash was about to reply, but a loud bang cut her off.

Everything went black.