Silky, Guilty Pleasures

Chapter 1: The Job

An Alternate Universe Detective Rarity Story

The room was dark, dark as the heart of the night, and that wasn't the way it should have been. I had left a lamp on near my desk, but instead of the soft glow of a golden bulb there was nothing.

I instantly thought about turning around and leaving. This was bad news, and I knew it was.

"Rarity?"

A soft curse left my lips. I didn't say it loud enough to be heard, after all, I am a lady, but I still said it none the less. A bit would end up in the jar at some point today.

"Hello Suri," I replied.

She was still lovely, in her own way. I could see the darkness move, the form become solid, and I watched as she stood up, walked toward the door frame.

The Supernatural beings had been coming out of the woodwork lately, and with their coming out they had recruited more into their numbers. Suri had joined the vampires.

I could see her fangs, hanging low, pronounced, until she drew them back up into her gum line. She looked at the floor, and I could see that she was wearing last years fashion.

It had obviously been a trendy piece, at some point, but then I had to wonder who she stole the design from.

"Bitter grapes Rarity, forget it, what's in the past is in the past," I thought.

"Rarity... I'm in trouble."

"Trouble, what kind of trouble?"

She looked at the ground, shuffling her left hoof.

"The kind that ends up being really big trouble. I didn't do what they say I did though! I didn't touch that colt!"

"Really, darling?" I scold, "here you are, a big, bad vampire and you are telling me you can’t get out of a teeny bit of bother?"

"Rarity!" Suri cries, "this isn't just any little trifle that just happened! The Canterlot Police think I killed some poor mother's darling!"

"Well, then" I say after getting to grip with the bombshell dropped on my coiffure, "I will have to see if there's anything I can do. Usually, these sorts of things are handled by a vampire's coven, but, given your state of dress, I would assume you are a freelancer. Yes?"

Suri nods.

"Well, then, we shall see what needs to be seen," I state, "I will look into this matter for you. I have a friend or three in Canterlot's Finest; they may be privy to things that will help or hurt in your defense. I do wish to get both sides of the story. IN the meantime, you can hold up here. I don't have any fresh blood on me and neither does my assistant. So, please, if you need to feed at all, it's best to tell me now."

Suri assured me that she had fed, and that if she needed to feed again she had the bits to buy a couple pints of blood from the blood bank.

I prepared to stroll out, but before I left I informed Coco of where the gun with the silver plated bullets were. True, it didn't kill vampires, but it slowed them down, and I've found that slowing them down, and making them heal like a normal pony tended make them a bit more compliant.

The first stop would be the Cider Pit. I didn't really go to bars like this, not often, but a dear friend ran this bar. Applejack had started running the bar with her brother years ago. The two had an open policy with anypony that wanted to drink.

The Cider Pit had relocated several times due to fires, rent control issues, and gentrification, but it's current location on Skid Row was a convenient spot for the clientele her bar attracted. Workmen, roustabouts, warehouse personnel, they all congregated here.

So, too, did the more seedy side of Canterlot's gentry. It wasn't all that uncommon to see the Flim-Flam brothers making shady deals in the Pit's dark recesses, nor now was it unusual to see vampire, ghouls, various paranormal beings, and the occasional witch or wizard to frequent here. Dear Applejack had an open door policy, a policy that stated that if you had the bits, you could drink here.

Unlike many of Canterlot's more upscale speakeasy's, AJ and Big MacIntosh had no qualms about letting the various tribes and other beings mingle. One of AJ's chief customers was a boisterous minotaur pitchman named Iron WIll. The dear has tried to hit on me every time I come here to pump AJ for information; I have had no choice but to shoot him down on every instance.

Walking in I felt something stirring in the air. The kind of soft reminder that danger could be but a breath away. I looked to see Iron Will, but he wasn't paying attention to me, no he was busy talking to a pony that I've known before.

Sound Ray was something of an odd creature. The Vampires, true vampires, were different than the Lunar Pegasi. The Lunar Pegasi could eat nearly anything, and everything, they wished to feed upon, and they were alive.

Sound Ray had been a detective for the Canterlot Police before some evidence was presented that framed him as the one responsible for the disappearance of some very vital evidence from the police evidence vault.

I knew better. Sound Ray was several things, but chief among them was a honest police officer. That badge had cost him more than a few nights of missed sleep.

Maybe it was because we knew each other so well, maybe it was because we had been foalhood friends, but I had the image of Sound that nopony else could ever understand.

"It's a good deal," Iron Will said.

I listened, knowing it was unlady like, but I had to know what Sound was up to.

"May it is, but it's not for me. I don't want to get caught up with that kind of business."

Sound got up, walked toward my seat, and smiled at me. I was here to talk to Applejack, here to find out what I could find out about the happenings in the vampire circles, but fate decided that I was here to talk to Sound.

"How's it going?"

"Oh, I am quite alright, Sound Ray," I replied, "but I do have an interesting case that has quite literally stumbled upon my door?"

"Canterlot's finest and most fashionable private investigator gets a case dropped in her lap?" Ray joked, "Perish the thought."

"I know," I shot back, "but it is important that I get as much background information as possible as I pursue it. It involves a young /wampyre/ mare and a certain young stallion whose life was ended rather recently, and from I gather, violently."

"You think they're looking to nail this vampire wench with murder?" Ray asked and I nodded.

"Well, if that's the case," Ray continued, "then somepony in The Underground may know something. I may to be on the force anymore, but I still have CIs that are willing to trade bits for info."

"Well, as luck would have it, Ray, I just so happen to overburdened by bits this week. Should any of your confidants have anything that will help, I will gladly recompense them."

I'll make sure to pass along the message," Ray said, then he asked, "you looking for AJ?"

I nodded and he added, "She was tending bar a few minutes ago, then I heard some shouting from the back. You might just find her there with her sister. Applebloom is at that tender age where she thinks she knows everything and yet known nothing."

I nodded, Sweetie Belle, my own sister, was much the same way. Sweetie believed that she understood the way the world worked, how things were, but I knew different . My little sister hadn't seen the world for what it was.

I started to get up, but I couldn't help but take a moment to look at Sound. He was the kind of fit that was rare to see on anypony except for Earth Ponies. Years of working out, jogging, early morning flights, and late evening jogs had kept his body in fantastic shape.

He was beautiful, and his crimson eyes looked into my own.

"I was thinking about Nightmare Night," he said.

I knew what he meant. We were fresh out of school, going out into the world, and we spent our first Nightmare Night away from home together. I wish that I could say it was innocent, but then I knew better. I wouldn't say it was a mistake, but I knew it wasn't the right time for it.

Sound agreed, and we remained friends. Smiling, I kissed his cheek, "Thank you Sound, and if any of your 'associates' feel the need to talk to me I will be inclined to share the wealth, as it were."

I walked toward the back where I saw Applejack and her sister.

Applebloom was glaring daggers at her sister. I know I had missed what happened, but I felt it in the air. The anger was still fresh.

"It ain't fair!" Applebloom growled, "Diamond Tiara had it comin'. If'n she an' Silver Spoon had kept their traps shut, she wouldn't sportin' no black eye."

"Now, now, 'Bloom," Applejack rejoindered, "there's a time fer fightin' and there's a time fer bein' civil. That last thing this bar needs is fer one of it's major suppliers to call it quits on account o' /you/ bruisin' his li'l darlin'."

"AJ has a point," Big Mac said, "we are trying to run a business here and as much as it pains you or I to say it, DIamond Tiara is off limits. You may not like her, Hell, you may just want to stuff her down a manticore's maw, but you need to tolerate her. If not for my sake or your sister's sake, but for your Granny's sake. You think Old Granny Smith would want to hear about you fighting in school? A school we pay for so you can can be somepony? I don;t think she intended for you to work this bar."

"Oh, a'ight."

The littlest Apple's shoulders slumped in defeat, and I watched as she walked past me. I knew of Diamond Tiara. Sweetie Belle told me of her often cruel and vicious sense of humor.

I didn't like the idea that she enjoyed tormenting those around her so much, but her father Filthy Rich was indeed filthy rich, and his family was a major supplier of nearly any business.

I sighed, knowing that eventually karma would catch up to Diamond Tiara, but it just wouldn't be today.

"Applejack, a moment if you please," I said.

She walked toward me, her shirt rolled up showing off her stomach, or lack of one. Much like Sound she had the build of somepony who either worked out or worked very hard.

In her case I knew it was working hard.

"What can Ah do fer ya Rarity?" she asked.

"Well, darling, it seems I have caught a case that is, well, rather sensitive," I answer, "it appears a new client of mine has been accused of murder. She swears she didn't did it, but you see, she is a vampiresand the Canterlot PD has her pegged for the job."

"Ah heard 'bout somethin' like that," AJ replied, "some poor moth'r's darlin' done got hisself drained like a juicebox. Not a pretty thing to hear or see, neither. Why don't you join upstairs and I can go over what Ah've been hearing?"

"Certainly," I concede, "lead on!"

AJ takes me around the bar, after swatting some ill advised hands away from her plot, and leads me up a set of rather narrow stairs. This leads to the business office of the Pit. It's in here where the raucous noise of the workaday stallions and mares below is drowned out by soundproofed walls and enchanted, one way glass.

The door to her office is a fine cherry affair with brass rivets which are merely there for decoration. The door is much heavier than any normal wooden is because it is not a wooden door; it is thick, steel plate with a cherry wood veneer that makes it appear as though the door is weak. Frankly, I've had on occasion had to hit the door with my magic and the portal is as resistant to hard kicks and punches as it is to magic.

Applejack pulls this door open with nary a sweat and allows me inside her office; she closes the door behind her before taking her Stetson hat off her head, unleashing her long and braided blond mane. She uses the Stetson to fan herself before plopping into the delicate grape velvet chair behind her oaken rolltop desk. She kicks her boots off as well and settles into her "usual self."

"You came at just the right time, Rares," AJ breathes, "everypony and their brother is spending any moment they can indoors and with as much company as possible. And they avoid the vampire and ledrfladder like the plague. If you can figure out what get the young colt killed, I would so appreciate it."

"That's the plan darling, but I dare say it has the potential of looking rather bleak. I know the, vampire, from before she was one. She was never the honest sort then," I replied.

"Figure she's playing you?"

I shook my head, "No, I doubt that she's actually drained the colt in question. Not that she may, or may not have done it before, but I do believe she is innocent of this crime," I looked at Applejack as she placed the stetson on the desk and grinned at me, "But I wonder if the police know about her past as well. If they do, then it means she is being framed, and possibly from inside of the police department itself."

Applejack let out a long whistle at that, "That's something you don't want to find. Your boy Sound out there was digging around too, but they got him off of the force. He was a little too well liked to be taken care of, or I reckon he was."

It was true, Sound had been at the end of a very serious framing.

"I got to ask you though, what's the story with him? I know he's interested in you, you are in him, but neither of you have taken it anywhere. If you don't want him... Well, I'm a mare with needs. I wouldn't mind sharing a bed with him."

"Well, it's- rather personal," I evade.

"Come off it, Rares," AJ sternly warns, "I can read you like I read those yahoos downstairs. You're sweet on him but something is holding you back. So what gives?"

"Well, if you must know," I begin, "it has something to do with his mother."

"His mothers?" AJ repeats.

I nod, "His mother, Discreet Sonar, is a member of Princess Luna's elite Night Guard. She has been trying for years now to get her son to marry into another ledrfladder clan, especially one of the clan ladies-in-wait within the Night Guard. He has refused, but his mother insists. She frowns upon any interaction he has with me. We did have a- thing once, but it fell apart. Mostly due to our own inexperience but also to her machinations."

"I'm sorry, Rares," AJ replies, "I know we Terrains have a well documented amount of tribialism, though you won't find that in the Apple Family, but to hear it in other tribes… It's downright tragic, it is."

"True, darling, true," I respond, "but I am over it all. If one day Sound decides to buck his mother's wishes and rekindle our relationship, I shall welcome him. IN the meantime, I have a case to solve."

It was sweet of her to understand, it really was, but this wasn't the time to think about Sound, and what I may, or may not, have with him. We talked, a bit more, and she did say that besides her normal customers either staying at home, or avoiding gathering places where the supernatural was welcomed, was causing a drop in business she did say that she heard a couple of stallions talking.

She explained to me what they looked like, and I walked back downstairs with the intention of seeing if they were there. One of them, a dark gray stallion with a nearly white mane, was nursing a cold cider.

The long scar going down the left side of his face told of an attack some time ago. There was no doubt in my mind, he was a shifter, an unfortunate soul that had been bitten by a were at some point, but it wasn't seeded in him. He didn't look lost, confused, or angry, but he looked stiff, like he was forcing control.

"Good evening," I said.

I'd had practice, so much of it, at making my voice sound like honey. I watched as he turned toward me, his one good eye widening, and a soft smile crossing his lips. The scar was still there, past the lips into the bottom of the jaw.

"Good evening Miss, what brings such a cute little thing like you out here to rough it with us lowlives?"

"Oh, you flatterer," I cooed, "well, I was hoping you could help me with something."

"Anything you ask, sweetheart," the shifter stated, "I will provide."

"How kind of you," I beamed, "though, I am unsure if this is something that would be- no offense, I do hope, beyond your kin?"

The shifter's eyes hardened for a moment before he said, "And just what exactly are you asking that I might find- difficult?"

"Well, you see," I explain, "I am asking if you or anypony you know has come across a being that- well, anybeing that may prefer the lifeblood of young ponies. I don't know if this an area you'd feel comfortable discussing-"

"You mean this is about that poor foal that got himself drained the other night, right?"

"Yes, yes,, I exactly," I beamed once more, "please, if you could tell me anything, even rumors, of what happened that night I would surely make it worth your while."

"Worth my while, you say?" The shifter inquires with a lewd grin and even more salacious gleam in his eye.

I've seen that look before, that certain Gleam in a stallion's, and sometimes a mare's, eyes. The longing look at something they desperately wanted to taste, to feel, to hold, and to control. I was not a trophy, I was not a prize, and I didn't bend over for merely anypony.

"Monetary wise darling," I stated.

He shorted, his gaze taking on one of indifference, "Bits don't matter much to me," he finished his cup, tapped the bar, and I watched as Applejack's brother Big Mac refilled it, "I've got enough for a room, some food, and a few ciders in the evening. I don't need more than that."

"And I'm afraid I am not that kind of lady," I protest, removing my veneer of sultriness, "what do you take me for, some two bit whorse?"

"You would have to be if you came here," the shifter growls, "now come here!"

A swift kick to his groin and a bold uppercut to his jaw send the shifter towards the door.

"Now ya lookie here, varmint!" Applejack shouts, "we ain't some high falootin' fancy speak easy but ya'll ain't got the trust 'round here to mess with mah friend. And if ya knows what's good fer ya, ya'll take yer business elsewheres!"

He got up, uneasily at first, and then I saw it, the glint of danger, what I felt when I first walked in. The growl was something feral, something primal, and it was more than angry. I could see the way his mouth opened that something was happening.

Some of my sources had told me before that when a were changed it was terror, and beauty all at once. With this shifter it was just terror.

Two of his teeth began to change, to grow longer, his muzzle began to stretch, his ribs cracking, breaking, and reforming. His fingers grew thick dark claws out of them, and his hooves, dear Celestia his hooves began to break.

I watched as they broke and the toes of some wild beast began to sprout from them. He was terror, horror, and awful. His growl echoed, and I saw Big Mac grabbing something from under the bar, but it was Sound that reacted first.

The silver dagger was swift, going straight into the shifter's shoulder, and it had a swift reaction. Burning hair and flesh hung thickly.

“AUGH!” The shifter screamed, “It burns! IT BURNS! Take it out!!”

“You tried to attack a friend of mine,” Sound growled, “that stays in until you learn some manners.”

“GAHHH!” The shifter bellowed, tears forming then evaporating as they streaked his burning flesh.

The dagger wasn’t short, and Sound hadn’t been gentle. I could see it, sticking out through the front his shoulder, the shifter was in pain, and while the ruffian had obviously planned on attacking myself and Applejack I felt sorry for him.

“I won’t do it again,” he whimpered, “Please, pull it out, let me go!”

Sound picked him by the back of his neck, carrying him to the exit, and then pulled the dagger out tossing the shifter out into cold unforgiving street.

“If you come back and I find out about it I’ll make a mare out of you, You got it? I will make sure that you don’t have anything to threaten a mare with again! Now get the buck out of here!” he shouted.

I watched as he pushed the shifter forward, the silver dagger sliding out, and the shifter stumbled away from the building. Vampires, Weres, and Shifters all healed slower from silver wounds. It usually took them nearly as long as it did a regular pony to heal up. Maybe that’s why they tended to stay away from anypony who carried a silver weapon, but regardless, I knew that the shifter that had been in here would be laid up for some time. I watched as Sound moved toward us, his leather wings extended fully, his eyes wide, and the scent of musk thick in the air.

He couldn’t help what he was, and I knew that. Sound was a creature that thrived on protecting others, of inflicting violence upon those who deserved it, and it excited him. I prepared to say something, to tell him thank you, but instead his hand found my own, and I was pulled to him. I’m a modern mare, I believe in equal rights for stallions and mares, I believe that anything a mare can do a stallion can do just as well, but there are times that I want wanted to be treated like a mare, to be directed, shown, and taken. Safely of course, not with somepony I didn’t know, but with somepony I trusted. I had so much to do, so much to accomplish, but the moment he kissed me, the moment I felt his lips against my own that slowly dissolved. I could feel his hands moving down my back, feeling my flank, touching my tail, and I had to focus, I had a job, I had to get to work, and despite how wonderful this felt, I knew that there was some things that needed to be addressed.

Gently I pushed back, “Sound, no. I… Celestia above, I love you. I do, but not like this. I have a job to do, and you, you have to decide if you want me, or if you want your clan’s acceptance.”

Sound looked crestfallen after I told him that, but he relented. His hands released me and he stepped back a few paces.

“I’m always going to care, Rarity,” he stated, “forever and ever.”

I gave him a smile, took his hand into my own, and held it, “I know, and when you’re ready, I will be too.”

I kissed his cheek, looked at Applejack, and couldn’t help but see the smug, I told you so smirk on her lips.

“I shall be off, there is much I need to do,” I said.

Walking out I looked at the night sky. There was a few hours before dawn, and I knew of somepony that would have some of the answers I needed. Equestria’s Premier Party Planner, Ms. Pinkamena Diane Pie. Her club, ‘Silky Guilty Pleasures’, was a haven for those who claimed to want to party on the dark side. Undoubtedly she would know, or have the contacts that would, what happened with the colt. It was time to move, and I was on the case!

Author's Note

Wow, a new story, and it has nothing to do with the Vogonverse, go figure! Okay, so naturally I've been playing around with this idea for a while. It's certainly a blend of Rarity Investigates with the Dresden Files and the Anita Blake series. I want to thank L0rd0f7hund3r for his help with the story. This started out as just a sort of goofing off session, and it's turned into a full fledged story. Go figure. The chapters are going to be randomly updated. I will try to update at least once a month, but being the work schedule I'm under, and my other projects, I can't promise. Still, I hope that everybrony enjoys it. After all, the goal of any author, or writer, is to have those who read our works enjoy themselves for a bit, and forget about life for a little while. It's why we do what we do. Again, Thanks.

RJP