Things Obviously Went To Hell In A Handbasket...
Twilight tries to open her eyes, but is instantly blinded by the lights. Her head is pounding, so she puts it under a pillow and tries to go back to sleep. Right before she drifts off, though, she feels warmth from both sides of her. Body heat? she thinks, taking her head out from underneath the pillow and prying her eyes open. She sees that she's in a bed, obviously, but in what appears to be the Royal Castle. She then notices a tuft of pink, fluffy... stuff from underneath the covers. She runs her hoof through it, and it feels so soft, so gentl- OH MANURE, THAT'S PINKIE. Twilight panics, gasping, and turns to the other side. However, she sees a tuft of rainbow colored hair. Rainbow Dash? she thinks, trying to crawl out of the bed. She shifts herself, and awakens Rainbow in the process. She does the same things Twilight did when she woke up, and as soon as she's staring Twilight in the eyes, she asks the all-important question:
"What the buck did we do last night?" she asks, not as shocked as Twilight was. Twilight could smell alcohol on her breath. She put her hoof to her mouth, breathed, and smelled her hoof. She instantly turns away.
"Whiskey..." she groans loudly. Loud enough to wake the other four, who each had a different reaction.
"Did anypony get the license plate of that truck?" Rarity mumbles, before noticing the rest of the group. "Goddammit, it's just like college!" she yells in dismay.
"What tha hay happened?" Applejack says. As she notices the rest, she looks at Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash chuckles nervously, a blush spreading across her face.
Pinkie Pie yawns. She notices the rest, and smiles. "Another successful party, Pinks. Another successful party." This garners a look of confusion from Twilight, to which Pinkie replies by blowing a kiss in her direction.
Fluttershy just says "Hmm..." before drifting back to sleep. Rainbow Dash tries to wake her up. Fluttershy responds with a hoof to Rainbow Dash's face, causing her to recoil.
Twilight starts saying, "What the hell is going on? Why are we in bed together?"
"Ah don't know, sugarcube, and I sure as hell am not pleased with it." Applejack replies.
Rainbow Dash chuckles. "I'm pleased with it. Never thought I'd see the day when I'm not the only one everypony thinks is a dyke."
Applejack looks at her with a look of mild hurtfulness. "We never thought you were a lesbian, Dash. And I sure as hell ain't one!" With that, she gets out of the bed and walks over to the nearby window. "Holy crap, look at this!"
Everypony in the bed, except Fluttershy, who had gone back to sleep, rushed over to the window. Strewn across the royal garden, almost everypony they knew was laying on the ground. DJ-P0N3 was unconscious on her turntables, Photo Finish was passed out next to a bottle of Merlot, Spike with a lampshade on his head (actually, he was awake and fine), the Wonderbolts without their uniforms and asleep next to each other... that last one caused Rainbow Dash to gasp in pleasant shock. "They're naked!" she yells. "Does anyone have a camera? I might want to save that image for when I get home."
"Ew." Twilight says.
"They're just normal ponies... they don't have anything special about them when they don't have their uniforms on, darling." Rarity says. She looks at Pinkie and notices a small line of red going down her face. "Pinkie, you have a nosebleed."
"Hm?" Pinkie says before putting her hoof to her snout. She takes a look at her hoof, and sees flecks of white within the red. "I may have done coke last night." she says. The rest look at her in shock. She puts her tongue to the substance. "No, it's just sugar." she says. "I must have had a powdered donut or something."
Suddenly, a somewhat regal, but slurred, voice emanates from the chamber next to the bedroom. It exclaims, "Oh lord! Why does it feel like there's a thousand miners hammering away at our skull?!"
"Keep it down sis..." another voice says, much quieter and less regal.
"Tia?" the first voice says, quieter and somewhat normal.
"Looks like the Princesses got involved too." Twilight says. She walks to the door to the chamber and opens it.
Luna responds first. "Close that door, please..."
Celestia shakes herself awake. She looks at her student, then at her sister. She frowns, and says, in a very unroyal way, "What the hell is going on here? Did I? OH SWEET ME, I DID." She then walks to Twilight, and sees the other five. "And you had a ménage à trois times two, I see." she says, somewhat rudely.
"Hey, now. Don't get pissy with us. We're as confused as you are." Rarity says. The princess smiles.
"Spunky, even when you have a hangover. I like that. Anyway, I'm not confused at all. I was invited to a party by you and your friends, got completely plastered, and ended up in this room probably making out with my sister while you all were making a damned daisy chain." She gets up and walks to the door leading out from the main bedroom. "I'll be downstairs, getting a glass of ginger ale and tomato juice."
Fluttershy finally woke up. She got out of bed and walked over to Twilight. "Wow, that was the greatest party of my LIFE! If, um, you don't mind me saying. That's the only party I've went to where I completely forgot everything! So it had to have been good!"
"So nopony knows exactly what happened, then?" Applejack asks. Everyone shakes their heads no. "Well, buck."
"I don't know bout you guys, but I'm going to get some ginger ale." Rainbow Dash says. She goes to the door.
"Me too." Pinkie says. She bounces over to the door, and walks downstairs. The rest of the group follows suit.
