Chapters Chapter II - The Ones Afore A Time
Nox awoke to the strangely familiar sounds of the old Bonfires of Dark Souls, and blearily looked around to find himself in a very, very old and crumbling mixture of a garden and a cathedral. Moss, vines, flowers, all kinds of plants covered the crumbling stone brick walls of the cathedral, tall, tall grass covering the floors. Overgrown hedges lined the area around the bonfire in a circle, the grass having grown to half the height of them, whilst two paths lay ahead and behind him. One led to a fountain area with two ponds on either side, covered in moss and lillies, while the path behind him led to a steep set of wide stairs leading down into a gigantic, overgrown city.
Nox stood up slowly with a groan as he noted the cathedral, which was open-air, had statues of what he could only describe as anthropomorphic horses wearing togas, both female. They held bowls filled with arrays of flowers.
He looked up to find the sun looking like the Dark Sign from Dark Souls, sky a number of shades of red.
“...Well. That certainly confirms my suspicions. Guess that’s why we were given such realistic sets,” Nox sighed in resignation, pushing himself to his feet and took a look around with Artorias’s Greatsword resting on his right shoulder. “So...wonder if anyone’s home...or Undead.”
He received no answer from the empty cathedral garden, only the burbling of the fountain behind him, and the crackling and humming of the Bonfire next to him.
Nox looked down at his left gauntlet and willed his Pyromancy Flame to manifest, causing his left forearm to burst into oddly gold-tinted flames before he aimed his Flame to the sky and attempted to throw a fireball into the air to act as a flare.
He was not about to leave the Bonfire anytime soon, so anyone in the area was going to have to come to him, instead.
Again, nothing. Save for the squawking of a few errant birds, that is.
“...Fuck it. I’ve got armor, two or three Big Fucking Swords, and a multipurpose flamethrower. I’ll be...mostly fine,” Nox grunted as he headed towards the fountain area first. He soon found a familiar sight. Standing tall behind the fountain was a Pharros Lock, covered in moss, but the face was undeniable. A very, very old and very overgrown wall stretched out to either side of it, the plants covering it nearly entirely. Nox looked down to find, to his luck, a Pharros Lockstone.
Not bothering to question the absurd convenience, Nox grabbed the Lockstone and headed over to the Lock, then shoved the stone into the receptacle.
And immediately jumped back in case the Lock ended up spewing lava or poison or something. To his confusion, as this had never happened in the games, it spat out a familiar pendant.
“...This seemingly useless thing?” Nox mumbled to himself as he kneeled down and picked up the pendant, gazing at its worn features before sighing and stuffing it in a pouch on his right hip. “Eh, might as well, if I’m being given it for free.”
Nox then turned around and headed down the other path. As he passed the bonfire and reached the stairs, a massive wall of earth sprang up in front of him, blocking his way down. He then noted that the pendant in his pouch started to grow warm in response.
“...Either you’re keeping me here, or my way out, little Miss Pendant. Let’s find out, shall we?” Nox exhaled as he took the pendant out of his pouch and held it up to the wall. The earth slowly turned gray and cracked, then crumbled away, allowing him to descend the gargantuan set of stairs.
Nox wordlessly stuffed the pendant back into his pouch and continued down the stairs, Artorias’s Greatsword resting softly on his shoulder as his eyes continuously scanned his surroundings. He looked out to the streets of the city below, noting the architecture had a theme. Nearly every building was open-air or had a skylight, and every building, without exception, had a garden added onto it somehow. He also noticed that the city seemed deserted. Not even any Hollows or Undead around. At least, that he could see. He was pretty high up.
Concerning, but it didn’t pose any kind of immediate threat, his mind deduced as he kept scanning his surroundings, sword arm tensed and ready to lash out at a moment’s notice.
If there was one way that being in the military actually benefited him afterwards, it was the heightened situational awareness that one developed after being shot at and nearly getting the contents of one’s skull painted across the helmet of the guy next to you.
“Wonder if these guys were druids or something. All the nature shit certainly suggests some kind of nature-centric culture. Open-air buildings allowed for better garden irrigation and a clear view of the sky, and prevented any kind of airborne attack from coming in unnoticed. Smart...if they weren’t probably all dead by now,” Nox mused as he stopped to look at a plant bearing very familiar seven-pronged leaves. He then looked around, shrugged, and broke off as many leaves as he could and stuffed them in his pendant pouch.
And then, out of nowhere, his pouch was nailed to the railings of the stairs by an arrow, and he calmly looked around to see a knight with roots growing all over its body, only the armor was made of stone similar to Havel’s set, and the helmet had a visor that was opened enough for Nox to see the rotting muzzle of an anthropomorphic equine. It raised a very beautiful looking bow that seemed to be designed to look like it was two tree branches woven together, and notched an arrow back.
“...Hollow, or still have some sanity in you?” Nox called out, not wanting to kill the first sorta-living thing he’d met in this new hellhole of a world. His answer was an arrow bouncing off of his chestplate.
“...Well, ‘least I tried,” Nox shrugged as he charged towards the Hollow, his Greatsword held just behind his right side. He jumped over the railing and onto the terrace, flowers being crushed under his boots as the knight pulled out a strange weapon. It was like two daggers connected by chain, but one dagger had a hooked end. The whole thing was decorated with bronze and made of gold, and the knight kept one hand on the handle of the dagger without the hook, swinging the weapon in its grasp.
A fireball thrown directly into the conveniently opened visor was Nox’s response to the flashy and impractical weapon his opponent was using. The Hollow screeched in pain, dropping it’s weapon and clawing at its face, trying to put out the fire. Nox then planted the tip of his Greatsword firmly in the Hollow’s braincase. It let out an inhuman screech, then collapsed, and Nox felt and saw what he assumed to be souls jump out of its body and into him, filling him with an odd euphoria and a strange urge to kill more.
“Mmm, nope. I’m not putting up with that shit, Mr. Undead Curse,” Nox shook his head as he yanked his blade out of the corpse’s skull, then flicked it to the side to get the blackened blood off of it before returning it to his shoulder. Then, the former marine went back to grab his pendant-and-weed pouch, removed the arrow, and reattached the pouch to his right hip.
“Now, then...wonder where else I could go,” Nox asked no one in particular as he looked around. He saw the terraces that laid on either side of the stairs, but looked back to where the stairs led into the city proper.
Nox nodded and headed down the path that led into the actual city, where he’d (hopefully) find someone that wasn’t a mindless murder-zombie to talk to and ask what the fuck was going on.
He reached the bottom of the stairs after a short time and found a number of Hollows just wandering around, from knights like the last one, to regular citizens.
“...None of them deserved this,” Nox sighed as he looked for a way around them. He saw many streets that likely wove around them, and decided they’d be better for now.
With that, he headed down the streets without any Hollows around them. In time, he reached a park, where he saw a… mare, he supposed, in a toga, much like the other citizens. The only difference was that hers had a pauldron of stone on the shoulder, and there was a scythe on her back. She didn’t look like a Hollow, and had an orange mane and tail, along with white fur and yellow eyes, which he noted were much larger than equines back on Earth. He also noted that he must be pretty back in the past, since the toga she wore, while armored, was much like those from Rome or Greece, and paid no mind to one side, meaning her left breast was open to the elements.
She didn’t seem to care, though, as she pulled out her scythe as she saw him, a wary look in her eyes.
“Hollow or sane?” Nox asked preemptively. She paused, as if not expecting the question.
“...Sane,” she answered, voice cultured and flowing like honey. She kept her scythe at the ready, however.
“So long as you don’t attack me, I won’t attack you. So, since I’m obviously not from around here, mind telling me why the Darksign is trying to eat the sun, and where I can find other sentient beings that aren’t going to try to devour my flesh the instant they see me?” Nox asked in a deadpan, stabbing the tip of his greatsword into the ground and resting his forearms on either of the rather large handguards.
“...Thou’rt new to this land, then,” she surmised, lowering her weapon.
“I literally just got here about...ten or fifteen minutes ago. Woke up back at the top of those stairs back there-,” Nox gestured to the point from whence he came by jerking a thumb back over his shoulder. “-in a garden with a fountain and a cathedral or something. Back where I come from, the sun isn’t dying, there aren’t Hollows, and there certainly aren’t any of...your species around. So, yes, I’m new to this strange land.”
“I see…” She looked to one of the trees. “Well, this land is known as Erra, homeland of us Earth Ponies. Now, it is but ruins, the old inhabitants Hollowed ages past, and I am all that remains of the old Caretakers.”
“Shame. Any remaining civilians? Or you the only one of your kind left?” Nox asked bluntly, not bothering to be tactful or sugarcoat his words with all the Hollows around. The mare shook her head slowly.
“I have nary a clue as to if there art others out there. I know only that this city, is lost,” she turned her view back to him. “Tell me, what is thine name? How didst thou cometh here?”
“Nox. As for how I got here...well, kind of a long story, but to sum it up: Two friends were on a camping trip with me in a forest, we found an old abandoned mansion, we went in and got locked in by a disembodied voice that called us the Chosen Knights or whatever, then gave us three sets of armor and equipment, and then we jumped into a portal that appeared in a doorway...and I woke up back there. Now, your name? I did tell you mine, after all,” Nox explained as briefly as he could before gesturing lazily to her.
“Somber Nights,” she answered.
“Well then, Somber...what say you and I discuss what happened to this world, and maybe get the fuck out before anything else comes in and tries to kill us?” Nox suggested.
“I can abide by that. Come,” she gestured to the tree as she sat down near it. “Sit a while, let us converse, as thou’st seem to have such a yearning for it.”
“...I was thinking more of getting out of this particular place before, y’know, some Hollows hear us talking or smell our souls and come to kill us, and then we would talk. I’m not exactly keen on conversing in a place wrought with danger,” Nox elaborated as he straightened his back and pulled his greatsword out of the ground, bringing it to rest on his shoulder once more. The mare tittered, pointing to the strange, glittering white flowers surrounding the park.
“Those bear a scent that repel most Hollows. I am certain thou’st caught a whiff of it by now,” she said. She patted the ground next to her. “Come. This is as safe a haven thou wilt find in this city.”
Nox stared at the mare for a few moments, then nodded and sat down beside her, “...Fair enough, though I must inform you that I don’t actually smell anything besides air. No fragrance or Hollow-repellant.”
“Now...tell me everything from the start. The history of this world, when the Darksign started to appear...and why the world seems to be stuck near the end of the current cycle,” Nox requested, giving the mare a firm stare that was hidden behind his helm.
“Hmmm, well, the history of this world hath been lost to the…” she paused, seeming to ponder something. “...Millenia, I suppose, of Dark. Ever since the two Great Ones left with their two children - and those children became one with the order of the world much like their parents - the world hath been in Dark. The sun rises, sets, the Blood Moon rises, sets… Each day is the same.” She paused once more, hand stroking the blade of her scythe. “...And then, the Dark gained its most recent embodiment.”
“...Embodiment? As in...an avatar, through which it exerts its will…?” Nox half-asked, half-stated as he looked at the sun, then grunted and shook his head. “Well, guess it’s only natural that other worlds with the Darksign and all that comes with it would have their own Manus, too.”
“Thou’st encountered beings like this before?” she queried, turning her golden yellow eyes to him.
“No, not I. A Chosen Undead long before my time, one who Linked the First Flame and gave his life to give his dying world precious time to live, encountered that abomination. Manus was known as the Father of the Abyss, and was supposedly the source of all the Dark in our world, amongst its many timelines...and it is from Manus, or what he once was, that humans - the Chosen Undead’s and my race - were born, by him splitting his Dark Soul to create us.”
“To make a long story short...the Chosen Undead went back in time after Manus pulled him back, slew the beasts and Abyss-warped denizens of the city of Oolacile, at the bottom of which was where the Abyss was born, and then killed Manus in order to stop the spread of the Abyss. He was a hero...but his deeds were attributed to another, one the Chosen Undead felt was far more deserving of remembrance than himself. But those who met him remembered. And they passed it on through generations, until someone told it to me,” Nox finished explaining, making good use of his experience with Dark Souls.
“Intriguing…” Somber mused. She was silent for a long time. “Well, there is not much else I know or truly remember, so I am afraid I can say little more to explain what thou wisheth to know.”
“That’s alright, I understand. I’m just lucky that I’ve managed to keep hold of who I am for the past...hundred, two hundred years? I guess that having my friends by my side for mutual support helped, but regardless, I don’t blame you if the Curse has taken its toll on your memory,” Nox reassuringly waved a hand as he leaned back and stretched his back, eliciting a few satisfying pops in the process. “In any case...I don’t suppose that you would be willing to accompany me as I try to reunite with my friends and save the world by utterly shattering the cycle of Light and Dark, correct?”
The mare tittered. “A lofty goal. I wouldst be happy to oblige… After thou’st helped me with something.” She answered cryptically.
“Sure, so long as it isn’t rape, murder or something equally reprehensible,” Nox replied.
“Well, thou’rt a cheery sort, aren’t thou?” the mare joked dryly with a shake of her head. “Nay, this is more… More an endeavor. There lies a fiend below the city, within the Tomb Gardens. A fiend I wouldst like dead, so mine mind doth not weigh so heavy with the idea of its life poisoning the sacred ground.”
“...Alright, then. Before that, however, I need a description of the beast, any information about the area we’ll be fighting in, and any knowledge of weaknesses or resistances that that thing might have. Don’t wanna go in there with a fire-coated sword and find out that it’s made out of fire, among other things,” Nox remarked as he stood up, plucking a few of the white Hollow-repelling flowers and putting them in the pouch with the pendant and the other leaves he took. The mare stood as well, and Nox finally took note that her scythe looked to have a stone blade covered in black moss, while the rest was just gilded silver. He also noted the black moss seemed to continuously leak a viscous purple liquid.
“I can describe it, but I know’st not its weakness, only that it was heavily resistant to my blade’s poison. It is a cragodile, but like no other of its kind I hath e’er laid eyes upon. Its stone scales are lined with chain, so I can only assume it was once a prisoner, or pet. It bears a shell, like a turtle, but tis cover’d in spines and spikes. It hath two sturdy defenses in both its scales and shell, and I hath yet to figure out how to best it and slay it,” Somber explained as she walked towards the edge of the park, urging him to follow.
“Lightning. Lightning or raw blunt force as weaknesses. Aim for the joints where the scales would be weakest or absent for flexibility to reduce or outright cut off mobility. Aim for the eyes if possible to blind it, make unable to see and thus react as effectively. If possible, focus on particular parts of its hide where the vital organs, such as the heart and lungs, are located and weaken the armor at that point until it breaks, or you’re able to stab or strike through its hide and hit a vital organ.”
“Blood loss is a slow, possibly risky, but undeniably effective option for killing it, so long as it doesn’t regenerate quickly from wounds and we actually have enough time for it to bleed out. Avoid the jaws and tail, the former could likely bite straight through solid rock and the latter can both break your entire skeletal structure and cut you if the scales are sharp or abrasive,” Nox listed off all of the things they could use to kill the cragadile almost the instant the last word left the mare’s muzzle, the man following just beside her.
“Thou seemest… oddly knowledgeable, of these matters…” Somber noted as they walked down the abandoned, overgrown and crumbling streets of the city.
“I was a soldier in my country’s military for a couple years, got into exactly 17 life-or-death combat situations, and thus learned how to identify and how to exploit the various weaknesses an enemy combatant might have. Plus, I read a lot of books that covered historical battles and whatnot,” Nox answered easily.
“I see… Well, that is certainly useful,” Somber Nights mused as the two continued walking, the sound of her hooves and his boots clicking and clacking and thudding against the cobblestones becoming the sole sound around them, aside from the many small critters and their cries and skittering.
“...So, since we’re just walking towards a hard fight, can I ask why you’re wearing a toga that’s only covering one tit, without any other armor except for that pauldron? It strikes me as a very bad idea to be wearing simple clothes instead of metal or even leather armor against a giant reptile with stone for scales,” Nox finally asked, giving her the vocal equivalent of a raised brow in the process. “I’m asking cuz most people back in my homeland don’t exactly wear togas into battle...nor do our women casually allow their more private parts to be uncovered for all to see.”
“Tis the traditional Battle Attire that all Caretakers bear. Back in the days of yore, these clothes were commonplace,” She turned to him, raising a brow. “Why? Doth my bare breasts make thee uncomfortable in thine trousers?”
“Lady, I was around naked men and women every time I washed myself in the communal showers. I’ve seen more than enough tits, ass, pussy, and cocks to desensitize myself to that sort of thing. You casually having one boob uncovered doesn’t really bother me, or arouse me. I bring it up because it’s a major liability in combat. It might weigh nothing and not constrict your movements whatsoever, but it’ll also do jackshit against a sword, mace, fire, or what-have-you that’s coming right at you unless you’re fast enough; and even then, even if you’re faster than your enemy can hit you, all it takes is one little mistake to get you clipped by a sword, an arrow in your body, or a set of teeth the size of meat cleavers clamped down around your arm. Then, you’re fucked...by which I mean that you’re as good as dead,” Nox lectured, returning her raised brow with a tilt of his head.
She huffed, crossing her arms. “I shall not let the paltry fear of death or injury keep me from respecting my people’s old traditions, nor shall I simply let some beast end my life. He did not end nor harm me before, and he won’t in the future.”
“...Never said that death was the worst thing that could happen to you. If that thing’s feeling particularly vengeful and possibly wanting to stick its dick in something, it could keep you alive and trapped as a sex slave or breeder for the rest of your undead life,” Nox bluntly and brutally stated. “It doesn’t matter if you’re not a female cragadile or not. If it wants to make you suffer, then there are worse things than death that it could do to you.”
Somber Nights gave him a flat look, then sighed. “Thou’rt truly a source of hope in this bleak world,” she said before stepping up her pace.
“Considering that I’ve seen entire villages of men, women, elderly, and children burnt alive as part of a scorched earth war tactic, women raped into catatonia, and my own comrades explode in showers of limbs and gore, it’s hard to talk of sunshine and fucking rainbows,” Nox rolled his eyes as he kept the same pace as before.
“Well, in this world, thou shalt need to learn to hold out hope for once,” she called back as a large mausoleum entrance loomed ahead of them.
Nox snorted, “I have hope, lady. I’m just not letting myself be naive or overly idealistic in a world that couldn’t give less than a shit about you as it chewed you up and spat you back out. The world’s a fucked-up and cruel place, and it won’t ever go easy on you.”
Somber Nights sighed deeply and continued to walk. As they entered the mausoleum, skeletons filling shelves on either side as flowers and plant grew over them, Somber picked up a loose brick, and, to Nox’s mild surprise, she crushed it, somehow molding it like clay in her hands. And then, after she was done, it looked like a partial breastplate, and she strapped it to her bare side. She turned to him.
“Happy?” she asked irritably.
“Much better, now that the chances of you dying and leaving me alone in the world again are lower,” Nox answered, this time in a much softer tone. She clicked her tongue.
“Suck it up,” she said simply, before turning a corridor and walking off.
“...Did that 2 years ago,” Nox mumbled to himself as he followed after her, his Pyromancy Flame held up like a torch.
In time, they passed a number of chambers, and started to hear the sounds of feral snoring up ahead.
“Don’t rush in screaming, or else we’ll lose the element of surprise,” Nox warned. Somber rolled her eyes.
“Do not mistake me for some novice to combat,” she said, quietly pulling her scythe from her back as they crept around corners towards the sound.
Nox cut his Pyromancy Flame off to shroud them in darkness, then drew his Black Knight Ultra-Greatsword. They turned a final corner and entered a massive chamber filled with piles of skeletons and bones, all looking to have been gnawed on and chewed.
A positively massive crocodile with stone scales and a spike turtle shell, was sleeping on a pile of bones, chains wrapped around it. A large scar was on it’s eye, and Nox felt the oddest sense of deja-vu from the sight of the beast.
“...Gustav? ...Why did that name come to mind?” Nox mumbled aloud. Somber gave him a puzzled look, only for the cragodile to snort in its slumber and creak open a slitted, yellow eye, looking straight at them. Seeing Nox, it’s eyes lit up in recognition, and it sprang up, chains rattling, as it let out a loud roar of what Nox knew was hatred.
And then, to his utter confusion, he saw a health bar pop up below his vision, with the name, Gustav, The Old Foe , above it. And then the bar faded from view again just as the cragodile launched itself at Nox, claws ready to tear him limb from limb as many times as it so wished.
“GLAD TO SEE YOU MISSED ME, SCALE-BREATH!” Nox shouted with a sudden and utterly alien sense of sarcastic joy and recognition, rolling to the side as the claws swiped through the air where his body had been.
He then promptly felt his eyes widen when Gustav pulled a Scorpion and tossed it’s chains at him, wrapping them around his leg expertly, like the cragodile had had practice.
“...Well, fuck,” and then, the cragodile yanked him over, and sucker punched him in the gut, denting the armor plating and sending him flying.
“Sir Nox!” Somber cried.
Nox stabbed his greatsword into the ground, slowing him down until he skid to a halt at the other end of the room.
Then, he gazed back up at Gustav, his helmet’s mouthguard now contorted into a manic grin, “If you were trying to get payback for the punch to your balls, then ya missed, asshole! But that’s okay! You’ll get another chance, right now!”
Nox pushed himself back onto his feet and pressed his now-flaming gauntlet to his greatsword, wreathing it flames before gripping it with both hands, his helmet’s grin widening even more.
“READY FOR ROUND TWO, PAL?!” Nox shouted, the utterly unnatural grin on his helmet stretching just a bit wider.
The cragodile roared in response, rushing at Nox. It smacked Somber away as she tried to jump in and help, the cragodile having eyes for only him.
“THIS IS BETWEEN TWO OLD ENEMIES, MISS OPTIMISTIC! JUST ENJOY THE SHOW!” Nox shouted with a laugh as he charged forward, dragging the tip of his greatsword along the ground as he ran.
And then, the cragodile retreated into its shell, spinning itself as it barreled towards him.
Just as the cragodile came within striking distance, Nox swung his sword through the ground like a knife through butter in an uppercut, the flat end of the blade smacking against the underside of the shell and sending it flying up towards the ceiling. He heard the cragodile cry out, whether in shock, surprise, or pain he couldn’t tell, but the beast quickly turned it to his advantage as his arms popped out and flipped himself over, the spiked top of the shell now aimed at Nox and falling towards him.
A cackle escaped Nox’s lips as he swung his greatsword overhead, smacking against the shell and sending the massive reptile into the ground several dozen meters away, though two of the spikes pierced through Nox’s gauntlets, a trail of blood following the spikes through the air and splashing across the ground.
“GODS-DAMN , IT FEELS SO FUCKING GOOD TO FIGHT A BIG GUY LIKE YOU AGAIN! DOESN’T MATTER IF I’LL JUST GO DORMANT ONCE MORE, IT FEELS GOOD TO BE REAL , AGAIN!” Nox roared, his helm’s mouthguard splitting open with a wet, fleshy tearing sound to reveal a set of blood-soaked teeth underneath as he laughed and laughed and laughed.
“S-Sir Nox?” Somber queried, startled.
She didn’t get a response as the cragodile unfurled from its shell, then started to swing it’s chains rapidly, whipping them around. Then, before Nox could do anything, Gustav started to whip him with the heavy chains relentlessly.
The chains smashed into Nox’s armor with the horrid sound of metal tearing and screeching from the impacts, blood flying all across the ground as Nox continued to laugh, his grin getting wider and wider as he dashed forward, uncaring of the damage to his body.
“THAT’S IT! KEEP SLICING ME OPEN, GUSTAV! LET THAT PAIN KEEP ME HERE LONG ENOUGH TO FUCKING MURDER YOU AT LONG LAST!” Nox screamed, his left arm bursting into flames as he threw a fireball at Gustav’s right hand. “HAVE SOME MORE FLAMES TO CAUTERIZE WHERE I FUCKIN’ STABBED YA!”
Gustav smacked the flaming ball away, then bum-rushed Nox.
Nox stabbed his sword between Gustav’s legs, then jerked it to the left and right.
Two basketball-sized spheres fell to the ground with sickening squelches, and Gustav roared in utter agony, falling to the ground and writhing in pain.
“I FELT LIKE A KICK TO THE BALLS WASN’T ENOUGH OF A LESSON LAST TIME, SO MAYBE MAKING YOU A GIRL WILL WORK BETTER!~” Nox giggled in a horrifying way as he walked up to Gustav and gently lifted Gustav’s head by the chin to look up at him. “But don’t worry. Big brother Nox will make the pain go away~”
Nox then grabbed Gustav’s head by the upper and lower jaws, then twisted the reptile’s head a full 120 degrees to the right as he yanked the emasculated beast’s jaws apart with a bloody ripping sound. The cragodile gurgled and roared as blood spew out of it, but eventually, it fell dead, twitching a few times as blood seeped out of it.
Somber Nights approached Nox warily. “Prithee, Sir Nox, art thou sane now?”
Nox was silent as he turned around to face her, the impossible grin of the helm now receding and...healing back into its original form, “Yeah...yeah, sorry ‘bout that. It’s been awhile since I gave the fucker that scar and whatnot, and since I’ve been erased from existence for the past however fucking long, I got a little bit...carried away. My apologies if I terrified you. I’ll give you your reality’s Nox back. Just…” Nox...or whoever was speaking to her sighed, then looked up at her with a palpable sense of remorse.
“Tell him...that when he finds her , and he’ll know what I mean when the time comes...to always protect her. Okay? Promise me that you’ll tell him - please , promise me!” Nox suddenly begged as Somber felt...something, maybe reality itself, fixing something.
“I… I will,” she said uncertainly.
A sigh of relief escaped the being before her, “Thank you…”
Then, he was gone, and Nox shook his head sluggishly.
“What...the fuck just happened? I...everything just blacked out for me, though I remember...I remember killing Gustav, over there, but...I felt like it wasn’t me...and yet it was ,” Nox said as he looked up at Somber.
“I do not know. But thou were frightening to behold with thine helmet turning into a bloodied maw,” Somber explained. “All I know is that thou underwent some change during the battle.”
“...Okaaay. Anything else?” Nox asked, feeling unnerved and wanting more than a little to kill himself before he ended up turning into some eldritch horror.
“A lot, truthfully. But first, let us find a spot to rest and recuperate. Oh, and grab the beasts soul, thou might procure use from it,” Somber said, starting to walk away.
Nox quickly grabbed Gustav’s soul before running up to catch her.
He found her sitting in a different chamber to the side, this one having the typical open-air garden. She was sitting on top of an overgrown stone bench, looking up at the sky.
Nox sat down next to her, then looked at her, “...So, what did the...other guy say to you?”
“Nothing, nothing, naught that really matters, that is, just…” she looked away.
“...Bullshit. Tell. Me. Now,” Nox demanded, fists clenching. She sighed.
“...I assumed it was about a lover, but regardless, he told me to tell thee to...protect her when thou finds her. I know not who this her is, but I can tell she is important,” Somber explained.
Nox was silent for a few moments.
“...I’ll protect her. Whoever she is, I’ll protect her to my last breath. He saved us the trouble of fighting Gustav, so...it’s the least I can do for him,” Nox finally said, rising to his feet and holding out a hand for Somber to take. “So. We killed that thing, now it’s time for you to hold up your end of the deal.” Somber simply looked to his hand, then slowly took it, letting him pull her up.
Then, for the first time since he’d met her today, she smiled genuinely at him. “Thank thee. That beast was… Well, he was a defiler.” She let go of his hand, then walked past him. She turned back to him. “Well? Shall we be off?”
“Yes. Let’s get going. Maybe along the way, we can find more of your kind and rebuild your world,” Nox suggested with a small chuckle as he walked side-by-side with her.
Author's Note
Part one of the first Arc, which I have taken to calling the Companionship Arc. Hope it's to your liking, my dear readers.
Chapter III - The Jolly Reunion
Uriel awoke with a start, scrambling to his feet and finding himself in a completely alien land. He looked around with awe at his surroundings. A natural reaction, considering he was on a chain of floating islands. He was on one of the medium sized islands, which hosted a ruined temple. The temple appeared to be made of ivory, almost exclusively, and he was in the center of it. A Bonfire lay next to him, and around it was an ankle deep pool of water, which, he noted, had channels that flowed out past the walls of the temple. The pool covered the entire floor, and beautiful shimmering blue and gold and white tiles covered the bottom of the pool, creating murals of a sort. He noted that there were a few traces of gold inlaid in the pillars, along with platinum, and there were statues of what he could only call winged horse people in armor with sword-spears in their hands, stabbed into the ground.
“Wow…” Uriel marvelled. He hefted the golden, twisted and hole-ridden blade on his shoulder, adjusting the large engraved greatsword on his back and the two maces on his hips. “Welp, time to explore this place like a kid in candyland!” he said cheerfully, immediately going towards the massive golden doors leading outside. Sure, he could easily just tiptoe out of the many holes in the walls, but where was the fun in that?
But, Uriel could hear something just on the fringes of his hearing as he reached the doors.
“Huh?” he said in confusion, looking around.
As he listened, what the sound was became clearer.
Someone was crying. Growing worried, he started to search the temple for the source. “Hello? Anyone here? Are you okay?”
The crying grew louder the deeper into the temple he went...and just who was crying became clear.
It was a child. His worry grew, and he picked up the pace.
Then, he entered a church-like room filled with the dead bodies of the winged horses he saw statues of earlier. Sitting in the midst of it all was a small boy of the same species with a sky-blue mane and tail, his body covered in white fur, draped in tattered rags and sobbing over a male and female corpse.
If the boy heard Uriel, he didn’t show it.
Uriel’s heart broke at this sight, and he slowly approached the boy. “Hey buddy…” he said softly.
The boy’s head snapped up to look at Uriel with fear...which almost instantly dissipated, replaced with a childish awe and some small spark of hope in his brilliant jade eyes.
“H-hey, M-m-mister. Are...a-a-are you a knight? Momma and P-papa said that the knights would come to help us, save us from the m-monsters…” the boy stammered, sniffling quite frequently as he wiped the tears from his eyes. Uriel pulled the cloth covering his mouth down and smiled warmly at the young boy, kneeling down and gently placing a hand on his head, one hand still keeping the sword perched on his shoulder. The boy flinched at the initial contact, but quickly relaxed.
“You could say that, yeah,” he said. “They call me Sir Uriel the Jolly.”
“U...Uri..el? Th-that’s a weird name, Mr. Uriel. M-My name’s Trade Wind,” Trade Wind attempted a smile, but an unconscious glance down at the corpses made his eyes well up with tears again. Uriel kept his smile and patted his head.
“Hey now, dry those tears. If you don’t, I can’t very well keep my title!” Uriel joked.
“...H-hehe...I g-guess so,” Trade Wind giggled softly as he looked at Uriel. Uriel glanced to the bodies, but kept his smile up.
“So, Trade Wind, might I ask what happened?” Uriel asked carefully.
Trade Wind nodded, “Y-yeah...just a day ago...I th-think, everyone was told to h-hide in here, from the Ho...Hool...the monsters. W-we’ve been l-living in the deepest p-parts of the temple s-since I was born, ever since the s-sky turned red and everypony s-started looking all...sad, and lost.” Uriel was struggling to keep his smile now, but he didn’t let it show.
“Well, there’s nothing to fear now, Trade Wind! For I am here!” Uriel said, standing up and doing a silly pose.
“...Okay, S-sir Uriel. W...where will you be taking me?”
“Well, first, I’mma do this! Hup!” Uriel picked the boy up, placing him on his head among the frilly white wig of his crown.
“Wooow...i-is this what it’s like to s-see the world as a g-grown-up?” Trade Wind asked, looking at the now shorter-looking walls. Uriel chuckled.
“Sure is, kiddo!” he said, hopping slightly, making the boy bounce a bit on his head. “Get a good grip?”
“Y-yeah,” the boy nodded.
“Alright bud, time for adventure!” Uriel said as he marched out of the room and back towards the front gates.
“O-okay. J-just...d-don’t go to that island over th-there,” Trade Wind said, leaning down a bit as he pointed at a floating island with a tall spire in the center to their northwest.
“Hm? Why’s that, kiddo?” Uriel queried, approaching the doors.
“M-mama and Papa never said, b-but...there was always...screaming c-coming from there. B-but it wasn’t a P-pegasus, whatever it was I s-saw flying around th-there. It was...something…big ,” Trade Wind whimpered, averting his gaze from the spire as if the thing he was talking about was listening or watching them.
“Hmmm… Well, if that place has anything I need, I’m afraid I might have to go there,” Uriel raised a finger to the boy’s lips before he could speak. “But don’t worry, bucko, I’m tough, and I can take whatever that place dishes out to me.” He patted his head.
“...C-can you kill a demon?” Trade Wind asked softly. Uriel paused, stopping just in front of the doors.
“Well, never tried, but I bet you three apple pies I can,” Uriel said with forced cheer, pushing the doors open with one hand.
“F-five,” Trade Wind replied.
Uriel chuckled as the two were greeted by the sight of a small, crumbling bridge leading from their current island to the biggest one, which hosted a snow capped mountain with a collection of buildings on it.
“Well, tell you what, bud, you lead me around to the next Bonfire, I’ll see if I can find seven,” Uriel said as he started walking towards the bridge.
“B-Bonfire...you m-mean the big, warm fire w-with the sword sticking out of it?” Trade Wind asked.
“If what my old brother in arms told me is true, then yepperoonie,” Uriel confirmed.
“Th-there’s one in the A-armory over there,” Trade Wind pointed at an island connected to theirs by a sturdier, metal bridge lined with spiked poles that led into a heavily-fortified stone keep. “Th-they made one there after the m-monsters started to appear. If P-papa was telling the truth, th-they have some cool w-weapons in there. I h-heard there’s even a suit of armor th-they made to help the Earthbound fly b-between here and d-down below. But...a lot of s-soldiers went there b-before they told us to hide where you found me...t-they never came back.”
“Hmmm…” Uriel hummed in thought, looking around. He hummed in thought for a long while. “Hrrmmm…” He started to sound like a certain knight, until he spoke up. “Hey bud, how old are you?”
“...Seven, a-almost going to be eight, in a week,” Trade Wind answered shyly.
“I see… Hrrmmm…” Uriel hummed again. Slowly, he walked towards the keep, the sound of grass and dirt crunching under his feet paltry to the sounds of the wind whistling in the heights. “Alright, bud, I need you to try your best to hide in my wig, okay? And hold on as tight as you can. Don’t let anything see you or dislodge you, got it?”
“Okay,” Trade Wind nodded, burying himself in Uriel’s wig like a cat burying itself in a blanket. Uriel smiled until his look hardened, pulling the cloth back up over his face as he marched towards the doors of the keep, tightly gripping his greatsword.
As if it had been waiting for him, a single Hollow burst through the doors, its half-rotted muzzle frozen in a feral snarl as its empty, sunken eye sockets glared mindlessly at Uriel for a few brief moments. It then charged at him with a screech, jabbing a winged spear at his chest. He instinctively moved his blade and deflected the blow, then followed up with a pommel strike to the forehead.
The sound of bone crunching echoed in the air as the Hollow slumped lifelessly to the ground like a stringless puppet. Considering how its skin and muscle had rotted away, it’s no surprise that its skull was all that stood between Uriel’s sword and the Hollow’s brain.
As the last echoes faded, the sounds of distant, muffled talking reached Uriel’s ears.
“Wait, did you hear that?!”
“What d’you mean?”
“That screech! The Hollows only make that sound when they find something to kill!”
“Huh. That was easier than I thought it’d be…” Uriel mumbled to himself, then shrugged and kicked the body off the bridge with an innocent whistle before continuing on. He eventually reached the doors and opened them. Once inside, he looked around.
“Quit being delusional, Switt! There isn’t anyone else alive around here but us! The Hollows could have just been arguing or something!”
“No, I am TELLING you, that Hollows only make that sound when they find something with souls to take! Someone is out there, Rain!”
“Hellooo!” Uriel called, cupping one hand near his mouth.
“...Oh Great Ones, you’re right, Swift!”
“See, told you! HEY! WE’RE OVER HERE! FOLLOW THE SOUND OF OUR VOICES!”
The shouting came from somewhere to Uriel’s left. Curious, he looked over to his left and found an iron door in the side of the keep, with a small sword-and-shield symbol painted in white above it. He walked over to it and opened it.
Two adult Pegasi - a stallion with a blue mane, hazel eyes and cream fur, and a mare with a gray mane, blue eyes, and brown fur - stood behind a barricade made of overturned tables, armor stands, and shields. Both were wearing steel armor molded in the shape of an aquila or eagle.
The stallion spoke first, sighing in visible relief, “Oh, thank the Great Ones, you’re not a Hollow! I don’t think we’d be able to handle another one!”
“Shut it, Swift! You don’t need to tell him that!” the mare hissed at him with a glare.
The stallion, apparently named Swift, rounded on the mare and growled at her, “And why shouldn’t I? He’s the first person we’ve seen in days, and to be frank, I don’t think I could stand another minute of being alone with you!”
“Ummm… I’m sorry if I’m interrupting an intimate moment or something, but I have a child here who needs a safe place to stay until I can figure things out,” Uriel said.
“H-huh?” Trade Wind mumbled as he rose up from within Uriel’s wig, sleepily rubbing his eyes. “‘m sorry, Sir Uriel, I...I fell asleep, and-”
“Trade?” Swift suddenly asked, his eyes wide and hands trembling.
Trade looked over at Swift with equally wide eyes, “U-uncle Swift?” Uriel smiled at this and lifted the colt off of his head.
“Found the little guy crying in the temple over… Well, he can tell you. Not my place. Anyways, think you can look after him?” Uriel asked.
Swift kneeled down and hugged Trade tightly against him, “Yes! Yes, I can! Oh, thank you SO much, Sir...Uriel, was it? I’ve been unable to sleep since Rain Dance, here, and I got trapped in here without thinking of Trade.”
“Are you out of your mind , Swift?! We can’t take care of a kid! We barely have enough supplies for ourselves in here! Tartarus, we just ran out of food two hours ago!” Rain Dance asked incredulously, gesturing to the assortment of empty jars of jam, scattered fruit skins, and piled vegetable peelings at the back of their little impromptu bunker. “Unless this Uriel guy volunteers to go to the market near the Spire, there isn’t any way we could even begin to think of keeping your nephew here! And even then , it still isn’t safe for him here, or for us! The Magpie will find its way in here, eventually!”
“What if I went and stopped this Magpie?” Uriel offered.
Swift and Rain both looked at him as if he’d grown seven heads.
“You’re saying you want to go out to the Spire and kill the thing that took down the 18 other trained Pegasi that were once holed up with us, here? The thing that took an iron ballista bolt to the chest mid-flight and didn’t so much as even falter?!” Rain asked Uriel with almost hysterical disbelief.
Uriel shrugged. “It’s a knight’s duty to help the people. I’m sure I’ll find a way to kill it,” Uriel said. He gave them a thumbs up. “So don’t worry, yeah?”
“...Your funeral, pal. At the very least, you’ll need to be able to fly to avoid the Hollows that congregate around the base of the Spire, though. And I don’t see any wings on you,” Rain Dance replied, looking Uriel up and down with a scrutinizing gaze.
“Th-there’s the armor for the Ea-Earthbound that Uncle Swift told me about in the armory, right?” Trade Wind suggested, prompting Rain to blink dumbfoundedly at Trade, then give the now-sheepish Swift a flat gaze.
Swift cleared his throat to ward off the awkward silence, “Y-yeah, well, my nephew’s right. The Ascension armor is still in the vault right behind, actually. No training needed, considering it was designed to help the Earthbound fly up here faster than it would take by balloon. Just...put it on around your armor, and the enchantments will do the flying for you...but only for about ten minutes. The one we have was a proof of concept, and it worked well...up until the Earthbound testing it ran out of time and...well, the clean-up wasn’t pretty. So, uh, be careful about that, Sir Uriel.”
With that, Swift turned around and pulled the metal door open with some effort, ignoring Rain’s cries of protest and claims that she didn’t agree to give the random stranger they just met enchanted flight equipment.
Swift slipped inside, then came back about ten seconds later with a faded brown leather harness with large, fixed metal wings on the back, likely made from steel. Uriel took it, looking it over. He then looked back up to Swift.
“Welp, thanks!” he said as he slipped it on. “I’ll be back in no time, with some food to boot!”
“No problem, just...just kill the thing, so that we can actually go outside without the fear of being taken back to that thing’s nest,” Swift replied as Trade Wind looked up at Uriel.
“You’ll...y-you’ll come back...right, Sir Uriel?” Trade Wind asked in a soft, vulnerable tone. Uriel smiled, kneeling down to ruffle the colt’s mane.
“You betcha, kiddo. I’ll show that Magpie a thing or two, and then come back with some delicious pies like I promised,” Uriel said warmly with a goofy grin.
“...Okay. Come b-back soon,” Trade nodded, waving goodbye to Uriel
“You got it, bud,” Uriel said, before standing up. “Well, I’ll be on my way then. Take care, you three!” With that, he walked out of the room.
Uriel closed the doors behind him, for further security for the three, then marched around the keep, hoping to find a Bonfire in it before leaving, in case he needed to get back quick. He eventually found one, just down the hallway from the room the others were in. He lit it, let it’s warmth wash over him for a few moments, then walked out of the room and the keep, walking across the bridge.
A veritable horde of Hollows in commoner’s clothes and some in knight’s armor lingered around the base of the Spire once he got to its island, noticing him almost immediately and rushing towards him with one combined earth-shaking shriek.
“Well… crud, they weren’t kidding,” he noted, before activating the armour of the Earthborn, soaring above the horde. “Good thing I got this.”
Then, a black-and-white blur in his peripheral vision slammed into him with the force of a runaway truck, knocking the wind out of his lungs at the same time as a pair of thick, vice-like grips clamped around his torso.
The next thing he knew, he’d been tossed aside and rolled/bounced along...solid ground?
Luckily for his stomach, he came to a stop with an odd series of clacking sounds...as well as a crunch or two.
He groaned, looking around to find what must have once been a very pristine bell chamber, with beautiful pillars of black wrought iron, but the floor was absolutely covered in corpses and skeletons - as well as a few strange, spherical piles of bones - arranged like a nest of sorts. The windows were broken, and he saw the large, nearly useless window he’d likely been thrown through. He then saw the humongous platinum and gold bell hanging above him on what was once a strong chain, but now, weakened by what looked like repeated collisions, it hung precariously above him.
“Well… Guess I’m in its nest already…” he mused as he stood up, brushing himself off.
Then the sound of bones crunching and snapping at the other end of the nest filled the chamber, followed by a confused squawk...if said squawk came from a zombified Xenomorph infected with the T-virus.
Uriel’s eyes swiveled in their sockets to look at something straight out of a nightmare staring back at him.
A massive, three-meter-tall Gargoyle - or maybe a mutated gryphon of some sort, based on its morphology - with thick, coarse black feathers that were covered by countless bones, attached by clusters of pink, pulsating flesh and nerve tissue. A large and tooth-filled beak hung open as its owner breathed in and out, thick ropes of saliva escaping its carrion-stained maw, its beady red eyes fixed squarely on Uriel in a feral glare.
The Magpie took a lumbering step forward, two hands with claws the size of Uriel’s forearms dangling in front of it and dragging along the floor as its beak opened unnaturally wide and squawked/roared at him.
“Well… Nice to meet you, Mr. Magpie,” Uriel greeted, gripping his greatsword with both hands.
His attention was briefly caught by what was, for all intents and purposes, a health bar that appeared at the bottom of his vision, with text saying “The Bone-Thieving Magpie.” It quickly faded, however.
The Magpie lunged at him, claws outstretched to skewer him through his gut. He yelped and rolled out of the way just in time, quickly getting back to his feet.
“Well that was uncalled for!” he cried.
A backhand caught him in the face, sending him sliding five meters away, though he managed to stay on his feet due to his body still being braced from getting up.
“That was even more uncalled for!” he shouted, before rolling under another swipe. “Fine, was gonna kill ya anyways!” He said, and rolled forwards under yet one more swipe, but came out of it with his sword, heaving it upwards and slicing into the Magpie’s hide.
Due to the bones covering its body, the damage was reduced, but it was still enough to make it bleed, prompting the horror to screech loud enough to leave Uriel’s ears ringing as it jumped backwards with the aid of its wings, landing on the other side of the nest. It fell to all fours and glared balefully at Uriel, then let out another screech...and leaped forward, almost immediately closing ¾ of the distance that had been between them with its jaws wide open and its claws outstretched.
“WOOP WOOP WOOP WOOP WOOP!” Uriel cried, jumping to the side and promptly running a bit to gain some distance.
He felt his armor being squeezed tightly before he actually heard it, the Magpie having already maneuvered itself to catch up to him and grabbing him by the torso. A pair of tooth-filled jaws clamped down on his arm as he was pinned on his front against the ground, trying and failing to pierce through the thick dragonscale armor. A moment later, Uriel felt the jaws clamp down on his much more vulnerable hands, a singular fang punching straight through his hand...though the resulting agonized flailing of Uriel’s arm broke off said fang, forcing the Magpie to retreat again with a pained screech.
Uriel tried to suppress his cry of pain as he quickly pulled the tooth out, trying not to let the pain of it worry him right now, as he still needed to kill the beast. He managed to grasp his sword in one hand, lifting it over his shoulder.
“Alright… No more Jolly Uriel…” he muttered, before charging the Magpie, sword raised.
As he charged, he felt his injured hand start to burn, followed by his forearm...and the burning sensation only kept travelling further up his arm, as if something were spreading through it...
...Oh. Crud, he was poisoned. That was bad, he realized. He then saw a tail coming for him, and jumped over it, and, seeing an opening, plunged his blade towards its head.
The Magpie twisted its head almost 180 degrees, like an owl, and tried to catch his sword in its mouth.
Keyword being ‘tried,’ as the sword shattered well over half its teeth as it bit down on the sharp shiny thing headed for its face. At the very least, Uriel wouldn’t have to worry about being poisoned as much. He did have to worry about the quintet of forearm-sized claws headed for his head, though.
Uriel yelped and pulled his blade out of its mouth, jumping off and backing away for some distance.
The Magpie snarled hatefully at Uriel, dragging its claws against each other with a sound not too unlike a knife or sword being sharpened. Then, it took in a deep breath, rearing its head back in the process…
And then thrust its head forward, a jet-like spray of rancid green poison flying towards him like a liquid flamethrower.
Uriel twisted his body away from the spray, and retaliated by rushing forward, and once within range of the beast, twirling around once with his blade, cutting deep into its armor of bones as well as it’s flesh.
The Magpie screeched and leapt backwards, clutching its wounds and glaring with undiluted hatred at Uriel.
Uriel just charged it again, blade held high. “BRING IT ON, NERD!”
Then the Magpie threw its head back and screeched in pain. A few seconds later, the spherical piles of bones started to shake...then flew apart as a half-dozen smaller Magpie-like creatures - all the color of pink flesh and devoid of feathers - emerged from what Uriel now realized had been eggs.
All of the Fledglings looked at Uriel as if he was their next meal, and screeched in unison as they ran awkwardly towards their parent, forming an impromptu wall or shield around it.
Uriel frowned, not wanting to kill a parent, but at the same time, he knew he had others counting on him to stop this monster.
The Magpie paused in its growling, cocking its head to the side as it seemed to have noticed Uriel’s reluctant frown, the minute change in posture that showed hesitance...a hint of remorse. Something in its head from an age past stirred, a memory of a figure that shone like the sun...before it shook its head, the unbearable hunger that had dominated its mind for decades taking over once more.
Uriel seemed to notice this as well, and slowly, hesitantly, stabbed his blade into the ground. He then looked up to the Magpie.
“Are you hungry?” he asked slowly.
“...SqUAwK?” the Magpie seemed confused that the strange two-legged creature it had been fighting to the death with was now talking...calmly, with a voice that stirred a feeling of contentment, of comfort and safety, deep in the warped beast’s mind.
Its hatchlings looked between their parent and Uriel, their postures relaxing, but still remaining tensed and ready to act if needed.
“I can find you food, but you need to promise not to hurt ponies first,” Uriel said firmly.
Gentle scolding from a parental figure long ago forgotten resurfaced, and everything finally clicked for the Magpie, its head flinching back slightly and its eyes widening as it recognized the being before it.
“...P...a...PA?” the Magpie spoke for the first time in ages.
Uriel paused for a good solid minute. “...Sure,” he said, pulling the cloth around his face down to reveal his warm smile.
The next thing he knew, he was tackled to the floor by the Magpie. As his mind and body prepared to fight back, he realized as a tongue ran along his cheek, devoid of poison, that it wasn’t attacking him.
“PapA! PaPa back!” the Magpie chirruped hoarsely, nuzzling and licking Uriel’s face like a dog that hadn’t seen its master in forever.
Uriel blinked a bit, before smiling wider and rubbing it’s back to the best of his ability. “Yeah, bud, Papa’s back.”
The Magpie pulled its head away and cocked it to the side, “PapA reMeMBer PUmpA-Rum?”
Uriel’s mind flashed back briefly to the one time he tried a Dark Souls game, not long after Nox returned from a mission a number of months before this whole debacle started. He remembered Nox telling one of the secret ways to get to the top of Firelink Shrine in Dark Souls 3, and how he had met the crow that traded items for greater items. Pump-a-Rum.
He remembered how he exhausted all of her dialogue, how he traded everything with her, and how much he just loved her adorable voice. As these thoughts went through his head, his smile only grew. He never finished that game, not even the first playthrough, but he still enjoyed it a bit, despite its difficulty.
Slowly, he nodded. “Yeah, Papa remembers ya, you cute little crow,” he said, patting the Magpie’s head.
As Uriel pet the Magpie’s head, the bones on its body began to fall off and its red eyes changed color to a dusky sky blue. Its body was still the same as before, but looked several shades of black lighter and no longer covered in bone armor. “Pump-A-Rum miSSeD PapA. PaPA leFt lOnG agO...told PuMP-a-RUm PaPA woulD ComE BaCK...but PAPa neVEr dID…”
“ThEn, the ScARy DarK PerSon cAme...hURt Pump-a-Rum...mAde PumP-a-RuM bIg, and ScArY and...HunGRY. AlWAYS HuNGRy. HungER HurT...hAd to EAt...bUt HungEr nEver StoPPed. PaPa...PapA maDe the Hunger Go awaY...please...dOn’t Leave Pump-a-Rum again, PaPA,” Pump-A-Rum asked Uriel with a wavering voice and tear-filled eyes.
Uriel smiled warmly, still petting Pump-A-Rum. “I won’t, promise. Heck, maybe you can come with me and help me find some food for a few friends! You can bring your kiddies, too!”
“Food? FooD EveRywHErE! TrieD to eaT tHe P...po...Pon-y foOd...diDn’T stOp Hunger...bUt kePt for Pump-A-Rum’s ChiCkiEs, iF theY coUlD eaT iT,” Pump-A-Rum drew back from Uriel and flew to one end of the room that wasn’t covered in bones, seeming to pick something up, then came back with several display cases full of food - ranging from bread, cakes, pies, candies, and various other things. Judging by the jagged and broken bases of the cases, it appeared that Pump-A-Rum had ripped them right out of the floor of whatever shops she took them from.
“Hmmm… Well this is wonderful for the ponies, but we still need to do something about you…” Uriel hummed in thought.
“...PumPa-Rum knOw Pump-A-Rum dID baD. PumP-a-RuM...bad chickie...PuMp-A-RuM diDn’T wAnT to hurT anyOnE...iF poNieS want PumP-a-rUm dEaD...puMp-a-rUm is...is...aFraiD, buT...wiLL accEpT,” Pump-A-Rum’s head dipped down, sniffling lightly as a tear ran down her cheek, prompting her chicks - their eyes now the same as their mother’s, too - to waddle over and press themselves up against their mother comfortingly.
Uriel’s gaze hardened. “No, I’m not killing you, my little crow.” Uriel said firmly. He stood up, walking over to the edge where a broken window was. He watched the world below for a time before continuing. “How about this? We go back down, but instead of looking for ponies to eat, we look for things like sheep or cows.”
“...OkaY. PUmp-A-Rum trUst PaPA. Papa alwaYs Knew…knOWs beST,” Pump-A-Rum chirped in acceptance, then laid down on her belly to let her chicks climb onto her back and lock themselves in place with their talons and their beaks. “Pump-A-Rum pUt chickiEs soMewheRe safe...can’T leaVe chicKies aLone. EmpTy oNes woULd huRt thEm.”
Uriel raised a brow. “Empty ones?”
“Yes, emptY onEs. The poNies at the BoTTom of Pump-A-RUm’s nEst. They’re emPty, no LigHts inside, not LiKE Papa’s LiGht,” Pump-A-Rum explained, as if it were common knowledge. Uriel nodded slowly as he understood what she meant.
“Right, well, I’ll meet you at that forest over there, alright?” he said, pointing to a forest in the distance, just below the mountain on a separate island.
“Okay, PApa!” Pump-A-Rum chirped happily as she flew off with her chicks fastened on her back.
Uriel smiled as he watched her go, before checking the Armor of the Earthbound to make sure it wasn’t damaged too much in the fight. Thankfully, it wasn’t. He then took a few cases of food in his arms after placing his main sword on his back, and then jumped out of the window, the wings of the Armor letting him take flight. He quickly managed to reach the island where the ponies were.
In time, he landed on the ground, just outside the gates of the fortress He dusted himself off. “Well! That was bracing! Gotta make a note to ask Trade and the others if I can keep this baby, it’s pretty darned cool!” he mused.
He then pushed the gates open and walked back to the room he’d left the ponies in, knocking on the door.
Swift Wind opened the door, giving Uriel a surprised look, “Uriel? You...you actually survived?! Then that means...the Magpie is dead? You killed it!?”
Uriel winced, rubbing the back of his neck. “Weeell… No, not really,” Uriel said honestly. Before the ponies could retort, though, he beat them to it. “Now hang on, before you say anything, let me explain. You see, it turns out the Magpie was my old pet from… Well, let’s just say a long time ago, and she was just driven mad by the Dark. Made her hungry, and all. I cured her of the hunger, and now she’s back to being my lovable little crow.”
“...Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t ram my spear through your throat for DARING to say that you cured the thing that KILLED OUR ENTIRE REGIMENT!” Rain Dance suddenly growled with barely-restrained rage, gripping her spear tightly with both hands as she resisted the urge to kill the man in the doorway.
“Private Rain Dance, do I need to pull my rank on you for the first time in seven years? If so, then I ORDER YOU to stand down, as your Sergeant!” Swift spoke firmly to the irate mare, who flinched as if physically struck. It seemed that whatever the story between the two was, the idea of Swift pulling rank on her must have meant a lot to her, since she visibly wilted before her fellow soldier’s gaze.
“...No, sir. You don’t need to do that, sir. I...I was just...I lost my brother to that...that thing, and you lost Commander Blitz Wing. To hear that this guy just…befriended the thing that’s killed so many of our people, I just...I let my anger get control of me, sir. It...it won’t happen again, sir,” Rain Dance replied quietly, her gaze glued to the floor.
Swift looked at Rain and sighed, then walked over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze and prompting her to look up at him as he spoke, “I know how you feel, Rain, but Uriel saved Trade Wind, and if he actually ended up making the Magpie a non-threat, then we might as well listen to him. He’s earned that much, at least.”
When Rain nodded after a few long moments, Swift looked over to the sleeping Trade Wind in the corner, where he was wrapped up in blankets and looking quite warm, and then looked back at Uriel, “Okay...so this...pet of yours...it won’t be a threat anymore, right? We’ll finally be able to leave this armory and be able to fly around, and be free again?”
Uriel nodded, giving them both a thumbs up with his free hand. “You bet! And, on top of that, Pump-A-Rum had plenty of goodies up in the Spire. I brought some loaves of bread with sweet rolls here.” Uriel patted the display cases under his arm. “See? And they still appear to be fresh, too!”
“...The Mag- er, ‘Pump-A-Rum’ has food up in the Spire? Entire display cases? If that’s the case, then we can load those cases up in the remaining carriage here at the fort, and be able to get out of here,” Swift said with growing excitement and hope, and Uriel could feel the room growing…’warmer,’ for lack of a better way to describe it, and the room looked a bit brighter than before.
“...Yeah. Yeah! Then if we take the carriage to the surrounding settlements, we could see if anyone else is alive, and stock up on supplies! We...we actually have a chance to survive,” Rain Dance spoke with widening eyes, allowing a small smile to form on her lips. The room grew warmer and brighter as she, too, seemed to gain optimism about their situation.
Uriel smiled. “Well, why don’t you all take these off my hands? I don’t think I’ll be needing any of it anytime soon.” He said with a wink as he presented the food to them.
The two soldiers didn’t need any further incentive as they took the food offered to the, and dug in, setting aside a loaf of bread and a sweet roll for Trade, then woke the little colt up and informed him of the situation.
The colt looked up at Uriel with awe, his eyes lighting up as he proceeded to look at his food and eat ravenously.
Once the three Pegasi had eaten, the two soldiers took Uriel and Trade to the top ‘deck’ of the fort, where several ruined horse-drawn carriages were strewn about and a single carriage - painted an ivory white with bronze trimming along the edges - still stood intact.
Then, to Uriel’s utter confusion, Swift and Rain hooked themselves up to the harnesses at the front of the carriage, followed by Swift looking at Uriel and gesturing for him and Trade to get on the carriage, “Come on, you two! We have food to get, and the world to travel!”
“Ummm… Oookay?” Uriel said hesitantly, slowly climbing aboard. Trade Wind followed close behind him, reaching up and grabbing Uriel’s hand as the man pulled him up.
With Uriel and Trade on-board, the carriage took off with surprising speed as Swift and Rain flew forward.
“Whoa!” Uriel exclaimed as they took off, gripping his seat tightly. After calming down from initial motion, he looked over the edge of the carriage in awe at what passed below them. “Okay, this is really cool!”
“Oh, this is nothing compared to actually flying, yourself, with your own two wings. Just ‘cause you were able to simulate flight with the Suit of the Earthbound, doesn’t mean it’s the same as actually flying,” Swift quipped from up front, his words distorted slightly due to the wind whipping past them.
“I’ll take your word for it, but I still say this is amazing!” Uriel yelled over the din of the wind.
Rain Dance scoffed, “Flight virgin.”
“Private,” Swift reprimanded her, causing the mare to wince and close her mouth. “Anyways, Uriel, we’ll be heading to the Spire and picking up that food, then getting out of here. Sound good? Oh, and if you see the Ma- I mean, Pump-A-Rum down there anywhere, tell us and we’ll...uh, land so that you can tell her what to do. I guess.”
Uriel frowned a bit at Rain’s behavior, but replied nonetheless. “Well, I told her to meet at the forest over that way,” Uriel said, pointing to said forest.
“...The Forest of Stone. Wow. You couldn’t have picked a worse place to tell her to go,” Swift deadpanned as he looked back at Uriel. Uriel blinked.
“What? You mean that forest is dangerous?” Uriel asked.
“Cockatrices. Chicken-headed snake things that turn whatever they stare into the eyes of to stone. The place is named the ‘Forest of Stone’ because of all the statues of the unlucky souls who fell victim to the cockatrices. Granted, they’re extremely rare nowadays due to...well, you saw what was at the bottom of the Spire. Whole world is like that, basically...only a lot worse, in some places,” Swift explained, already changing course to head to the Forest of Stone. “If we’re lucky, Pump-A-Rum will be okay. If not...well, there’s no way we can carry her petrified statue with us.”
“Th-that’s...that won’t h-happen, right, Sir Uriel?” Trade Wind asked, looking up at the man in question with worried eyes. “P-Pump-A-Rum may h-have hurt a lot of ponies, but...i-if you say that sh-she’s not a m-monster, then...I-I don’t want her to be hurt.” Uriel pulled the cloth around his neck up, eyes full of steel.
“She won’t get hurt. Not on my watch,” he said. He then glanced to his wound. He could still use the arm, but it was quite painful. So, he started to rummage around in his pouch for something. He soon pulled a dull green flask out, a strange, orange liquid filling it. He popped off the cork, then took a quick swig. In little to no time at all, his wound healed up. He patted his arm. “Good as new.”
Swift looked back at the flask in Uriel’s hand with curiosity, “The hell is that? How did it heal you so quickly?”
“Hm? Oh, this is Estus, and Undead/Unkindled favorite. Heals our wounds quicker than anything, and refills each time we go to a Bonfire,” Uriel explained.
“...Those are rarer than rare, Uriel. Those things...they were around back before the Fall, and only then. Only shards of those things have been found since,” Swift remarked over the roaring wind.
“Really?” Uriel queried, then looked to his flask. He stared at it a bit, before placing the cork back and stashing it away. “Guess I’ll have to remember that.”
“Keep a hold of it. Don’t lose it, whatever you do. It’s worth more than all of the gold in the three Capitals combined,” Swift added as they approached the Spire, and landed just inside, the bones of Pump-A-Rum’s nest crunching and clacking beneath the carriage.
Uriel jumped off the carriage, heading towards the display cases to pick them up.
“Just load them on, we...we can’t really bear to look down at the moment,” Swift Wind instructed, staring firmly at the ceiling above like Rain Dance was.
“I can understand that. Have a friend who used to be the same with his old team,” Uriel said, placing a stack of three cases in the back of the carriage, then walking back to grab more.
“Just load them all up. And...please, make it quick,” Swift urged, not wanting to be there any longer than necessary. Uriel nodded, quickly placing all the display cases inside, then hopping in.
“Alright, let’s shove off to save my little crow!” he said.
With that, the four flew out of the Spire and towards the forest...which had apparently caught on fire since they’d last seen it.
“...Somehow, I’m not surprised,” Swift muttered to himself as the carriage descended and touched down in a clearing some distance away from any fire. Uriel immediately jumped out, sprinting toward the edge.
“Pump-A-Rum! Pump-A-Rum where are-?!” he cried.
The giant crow flew out of the forest and tackled Uriel to the ground, nuzzling her beak against his cheek, “Papa back! Papa back! Papa didn’t leave this time! Pump-A-Rum happy!”
“...S-she’s...big,” Trade Wind stated, awkwardly holding his own hands as he looked at Pump-A-Rum.
Uriel wrapped her in a hug. “Thank God… I was worried you’d died in those fires…” Uriel said softly.
“Fires? Pump-A-Rum was just making fried chicken for her chickies! They made Pump-A-Rum feel tired and slow, but they break easy,” Pump-A-Rum replied, licking Uriel’s face and pressing her body against him...letting him feel two modestly-sized masses press against his chest plate. Uriel blushed, since even though he was wearing dragonscale armor, he could still feel her mounds.
“I-I see, well, I’m just glad you’re safe!” Uriel said happily, trying to get up and avoid looking at her.
Pump-A-Rum chirped/giggled and pulled away from Uriel, then immediately moved her gaze to the three other people with him, “Are they your pony friends, Papa? Pump-A-Rum is happy to meet you!”
“...Uh, nice to meet you, too, Pump-A-Rum...though I wish it were under better circumstances,” Swift replied after a few moments, gesturing to himself, then to Rain Dance. “I’m Swift Wind, and this mare here is Rain Dance.”
Swift Wind then put a hand on Trade’s shoulder and gently pushed him forward, “And this is my nephew, Trade Wind.”
Trade simply gulped and waved timidly, “H-Hi...P-Pump-A-Rum. Nice to m-meet you.”
“...What’s a ‘nephew?’ Is it you ponies’ way of saying he’s your chicky?” Pump-A-Rum asked with a tilt of her head.
Swift shook his head with a chuckle, “No, not exactly. Basically: He’s the son of my sister. When a boy is the son of one of your direct siblings, you call him your nephew, and a niece is the same thing but with a sibling’s daughter, instead.”
“...So he’s your sister’s chicky? Where’s his momma?” Pump-A-Rum asked, looking around.
Swift winced and looked down at Trade, who merely nodded blankly after a few moments, then looked back up at Pump-A-Rum, “Umm...she’s no longer with us, and...neither is his father.”
Pump-A-Rum visibly deflated, her head and wings drooping sadly, “Oh...did...Pump-A-Rum…?”
“I don’t think so… I remember seeing their bodies, and they were pretty far from the Spire...” Uriel said. “Either way, we can’t do anything about it now.” He patted her on the back. He then looked to Trade and kneeled down, patting his head. “If it makes you feel better, bud, I don’t have parents either.”
“Y-you don’t?” Trade asked with surprise. Judging by the looks on everyone else’s faces, they were surprised, too. Uriel nodded, standing up.
“Yup. But that’s a story for later. Right now, we need to get off this archipelago of floating islands, and down to the surface. I have to see my brothers again, after all,” Uriel said, a beaming smile on his face.
“Pump-A-Rum will go get her chickies, then she’ll fly with Papa and Papa’s friends! Pump-A-Rum will catch up!” Pump-A-Rum said as she turned around and headed back into the forest.
“...I suggest that we listen to her. Even if she’s killed the cockatrices, judging by what she said, the forest is still on fire ,” Swift suggested, already hooking himself back up to the carriage.
“Yup! My little crow is quite the fighter!” Uriel said proudly, hands on his hips.
Trade boarded the carriage once more as Rain Dance hooked herself up to the carriage. Trade looked back at Uriel, “C-come on, Uriel. It’s t-time to go.”
Uriel nodded, climbing on. He pointed forward in a dramatic pose. “Onwards to adventure and glory!”
Author's Note
This chapter and it's following one will have sexual themes, but don't worry, it won't be focused on much at all. After all, this is a Dark Souls fic!
Chapter IV - Gems and Spirals
Perry groaned loudly as he pushed himself up to a sitting position, blearily opening his eyes to see a massive, sprawling cityscape below him. Only, it was abandoned. The buildings looked worn, as well, and were crumbling. The city had a type of architectural design to it that he’d never seen before, either. For one, it seemed that every building had spiral designs, as well as crystals that lined the bases of the groundwork. Perry turned his head to the right to find a Bonfire, humming and crackling away, whilst the large, leather wrapped black greatsword he had gained was on the ground near it.
He then noticed the massive shadow looming over him, and turned around to see that he was at the front gates of a massive marble structure in the shape of a unicorn’s horn, spirals and everything. He stood up, trying to get a better look at it.
It had some windows on it, too, he noted, and the gates of the tower were gilded with silver and a strange purple metal, crystals along the edges. He then noted that the sky was red, and the sun looked like that Darksign thing Nox used to go on about.
With all this knowledge, Perry promptly freaked out. “GODDAMMIT!” he yelled in rage. He kicked the door, feeling the satisfaction of denting the metal, before doing so again, and again, and again. “FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT VOICE! FUCKING INTERDIMENSIONAL ASSHOLES! FUCK!” Perry collapsed to the ground, head in his hands. “Why… Fucking why?! We didn’t even do anything wrong! We didn’t deserve this bullshit!” Perry trembled with rage and despair as he tried to calm himself down. “Why…? Who would do this?” he wondered aloud.
“Someone or something that hates you, from the sounds of it. Now can you pipe down or help me get out of this cell?” A voice came from behind the door he’d just been kicking. Perry blinked.
“I’m… sorry? Who are you?” he asked, slowly standing up again and grabbing the black-bladed greatsword from it’s spot on the ground.
“Name’s Noctis. Noctis Eclipse. Former Lieutenant in the Magus Corp, up until, say...twenty days ago? I can’t tell anymore, since time is so messed up around here,” the male on the other side of the door replied.
“Ummm… You sure it’s been that long? Looks to me like all of the people who were around here are long gone or dead,” Perry noted.
“Time. Is. Messed. Up. That’s all I gotta say, pal. ‘s just a fact. Now, you gonna let me out so that I can find my sister, or are you gonna kill me so that I don’t have to deal with staring at this wall for another twenty days?”
“Ummm… Guess I’ll help, then…” Perry said slowly, walking towards the door and pushing it open. Inside, he found a number of shelves full of books, reaching up to another level of the tower, with that level having bookshelves that reached the next level, and so on. But, in the middle of the main floor was an iron grate. Perry walked over to it, peering down.
A hand waved at him from within, “Yeah, I’m down here. Mind opening the grate so I can get out?” Perry squinted his eyes, trying to get a better look, but failed. With a small sigh and grumble about being roped into shit all the time, he looked around the grate for a lock, found it, and kicked it off, then lifted the grate off and tossed it aside.
“Need help getting out or are you good?” he asked.
“Nope, I got it covered,” the man said as a blue glow filled the area beneath where the grate used to be, followed by what Perry could only describe as an anthropomorphised unicorn jumping out, his feet wrapped in that same blue glow.
The...stallion, Perry supposed he could call him, was actually fairly androgynous, but leaned more towards the masculinity. A set of hardened brown leather armor covered the stallion’s frame, a broadsword at his hip and a kite shield on his back. Small patches of night-blue fur peeked out from the places that the armor didn’t cover. A pair of lazy seafoam-green eyes framed by a straight, shoulder-length black mane looked up at Perry.
“Thanks, pal, was getting sick of counting the water drops in my head,” the stallion - or maybe Noctis, it seemed like - thanked Perry with a nod, then a kiss on his helmet’s face where the mouth would be before walking past Perry with a casual wave goodbye. “Welp, I’m off to save my sister. See yaaa!~”
Perry blinked as he stared after the stallion. Once. Twice. Thrice. Finally, he shook himself to set his head straight. “Well… That was rather…uncomfortable.” Perry looked around at all the books. “Hmmm... Maybe I can figure out where I am with these.” He mused. “Might as well try and use my bookish talents…”
“Aaactually, since I just saw that there’s no way down to city that way, I can tell you where you are and what’s going on, uuuh…” Noctis said as he walked back in, stopping a few feet away from Perry and rolling his hand in circles about the wrist expectantly. Perry just looked at him for a moment, then sighed and nodded.
“That’d be great,” he said. Perry stuck his own hand out. “My name is Perry, short for Perripheus.”
“Right, well then, Perry the Platypus, you are in Ornia, capital of the Unicorn kingdom...or what’s left of it,” Noctis said as he sat down opposite of Perry at the table, shaking the man’s hand with a firm grip. “Y’see, it’s the end of the world and whatnot, and the Undead are roaming around and going Hollow, and the monsters and the Dark are closing in….So, yeah, things aren’t exactly all that great at the moment. Meanwhile, I’m trying to find my sister in all of this, and take her away from here. Aaand...that’s it, really. All history prior to, y’know, the end of the world is gone, so I wouldn’t be able to tell you what happened...nor could I, since I can’t read.”
Perry blinked a few times, then sighed deeply, hand meeting his visor. “Well, that’s fucking great. I’m in dystopian pony-shitfest land…”
“Ah-ah-ah! It’s dystopian unicorn -crapsack land. Don’t be a generalizer, Perry the Platypus,” Noctis berated with a wag of the finger and a smirk. Perry gave him a look.
“...With all the shit I’ve been through, I’m tempted to cut you up and eat you. Heard horse is good,” Perry mused.
“And I can crush you with my mind,” Noctis retorted as the table and two of the surrounding shelves suddenly compacted into spheres of splinters and pulverized wood that hovered in mid-air. “So...yeah, unless you mean you’ll eat me out, there will be no such thing done to my person, ‘kay?”
“...” Perry raised his hands up, stood up, and started walking away after seeing the display. “Nope! Done with this shit!”
“Dude, come back. You’ll get eaten by the Gem Spiders,” Noctis called out to the fleeing Perry.
“Good! Maybe after I die I can get back home, or at least head to Heaven!” Perry called back, reaching the threshold of the tower.
“Did I mention they eat you genitals first with a neurotoxin?” Noctis added. Perry paused.
“...Jesus H-Fucking Christ you’re desperate,” Perry noted, slowly turning around.
“Yeah, actually, I’m not kidding,” Noctis replied. “Those things do eat genitals first, due to the bladder and whatnot being right around there, since they go for fluids first, before they suck up your guts. Saw it happen to that guy.”
Noctis pointed above himself. Perry looked up to see a dessicated stallion with a hollowed-out genital region hanging from the rafters. He stared for a bit, then looked back down to Noctis. A short staring contest ensued, until the man sighed deeply and walked back over, sitting down.
“Alright, fine, I’ll help. But! You call me Perry the Platypus and I’m fucking out. Hated that name enough as a kid,” Perry stated firmly.
“Fair enough. If it makes you feel better, I got teased about my name as a kid, too. They made knock-knock jokes constantly, since the first three letters of my name, ‘Noc’, sound like ‘knock.’ So...they made ‘Noc-Noc’ jokes,” Noctis offered as compensation for the name-calling.
“Well, can’t be worse than being pantsed and forced to waddle through the schoolyard,” Perry mused.
“I had a dick shoved in my mouth in the bathroom,” Noctis replied with a straight face. “Bit the guy’s dick off after a few seconds of sucking, but it still happened, since I looked pretty girly as a teen.” Perry just stared at him.
“Yeah, I had a messed-up childhood. But my sister made it all bearable,” Noctis nodded sagely.
“...I’m now wondering why you started to suck the bastard off at first. False sense of security?” Perry guessed.
“Nah, just wondered what it would be like to suck another dude’s dick. His tasted awful and was a bit too big for my mouth, so I bit it off,” Noctis said. “I wonder what yours tastes like…”
Perry just stared at Noctis more. “...I’m just gonna ignore that,” he said, before looking around. “So, any ideas as to where your sis may be?”
Noctis shrugged, “Top of the library. She worked there as the assistant head-researcher of the Ornian Magical Institute...before everything turned into the apocalypse, that is. She’s still up there, based on all the times she’s been talking to me in my head.”
“Well, let’s find a way up, then,” Perry said, standing up.
“Stairs are right there, Perry,” Noctis pointed out as he pointed at a spiral staircase set inside the wall on the opposite end of the floor that led up to the higher levels. “I think there was an elevator, but that got destroyed when the Magi here went Hollow.”
“I see… Well, good thing I have a shield,” Perry said, pulling said shield from his back. “Ya know, in case of bolts of magic bullshit.”
“I hear ya on that one. Magic is such a pain to deal with, especially since a lot of offensive spells home in on ya, and can cross dozens of feet in a few seconds,” Noctis agreed as he got up and led the way forward to the staircase.
“Way to lighten the mood,” Perry said with a sigh as they walked up the stairs, Perry keeping his shield up in front of him.
“Oh, don’t worry about those Hollows I mentioned spamming magic. They got eaten by the Gem Spiders. That stallion on the ceiling was one of them, saw it happen from inside the grate. The Spiders seem to like magic users more, probably because of all the magical energy in their bodies. So if there was a Gem Spider, you, and a magic-user in one small room, it’ll always goes for the magic guy first,” Noctis reassured his impromptu companion.
“Well, if what my friend told me is true, Undead come back to life at a Bonfire, sooo..” Perry said.
“Bonfire? What does a big, glorified campfire gotta do with anything?” Noctis asked.
“No no no, it’s the size of an actual campfire, only it burns by itself, and has a sword in it. Think Nox said it was fueled by souls…” Perry explained, muttering the last part to himself.
“...Oooh, you mean the Respites,” Noctis said with realization, then nodded his head. “Yeah, that’d be a problem. Thing is, that Hollow that got eaten by the Gem Spider died the day after I got trapped in the grate. Definitely hasn’t come back since.”
“Could be it came back, but wandered off somewhere. Hollows don’t have any real sense of direction, I think…” Perry noted.
“Now look who’s being pessimistic, love?” Noctis rolled his eyes.
“Ah shove it up your ass, ya jerk,” Perry replied as they walked up the stairs.
“If you mean shove your dick up my ass, then gladly,” Noctis replied without missing a beat. Perry just stopped. He then slowly resumed walking.
“...Gonna ignore that one as well…” he said.
“Yeah, sorry if I seem a bit weird. Being pretty much sexually assaulted as a teen, plus all the other personal crap I’m not going to tell you, kiiinda screwed something up in my head. I just say whatever comes to my mind, and I’m not afraid to speak without a single hint of restraint in my body,” Noctis apologized as the two began to ascend up the Institute’s central tower.
“Well, long as you don’t just randomly try to get in my pants, I’ll deal,” Perry replied as they reached the second level.
“No promises, since I never got to figure out my own sexuality before things started going downhill,” Noctis said. “But I will try, so long as you don’t freak out about what’s in mine later.”
“...No promises. Had my own troubles with sexuality, but eventually settled for straight, and my parents… Well, rather, my mom, was pretty unsupportive and conservative…” Perry admitted, before stopping at a large set of ornate wooden doors, realizing what Noctis said. “Wait, what’s in yours? What do you mean? Don’t you have a dick?”
“Oh, look! A Gem Spider!” Noctis said as he shoved Perry to the side before jumping out of the way of a man-sized spider whose carapace was covered in a layer of coarse, unrefined gems, and had fangs that dripped with a poison that melted the floor beneath it. “Let’s continue this conversation never.”
“Holy fucking shit!” Perry cursed, managing to get to his feet. “That’s a Gem Spider?! Thing’s fucking massive!”
“Told you you’d get eaten by them. Why do you think that guy down there had the huge hole in his lower torso? One Gem Spider did that, not a bunch of little ones, otherwise he’d have just killed them all with a magic attack or something. Try hitting it with something that can deal blunt-force trauma, that works wonders on the gems coating its carapace - shatters ‘em like glass or pottery!” Noctis explained as he jumped backwards, the Gem Spider immediately going for him and not giving Perry even a single glance, just as Noctis said it would.
“I have literally nothing that could do that but my shield or fists!” Perry cried, seeming at a loss as to what to do to help.
“You got a big sword with a flat edge , genius!” Noctis shot back as he dodged a swipe of the Gem Spider’s forelegs. Perry grit his teeth. He’d never been in a fight like this before. Sure, he’d sparred with Nox and Uriel at times, even been in bar fights and the like, but never life-or-death fights with weapons. Thus, he shakily placed his shield on his back, and grabbed his black greatsword in both hands, rushing forwards.
Once he reached the Gem Spider, a short flow of information flooded his brain, and, like he was on autopilot, he swung his blade up, launching the monster up before it fell back down in a heap, a heavy wound on its gut weeping a strange iridescent ichor. The Gem Spider hissed in pain and rolled over onto its legs...and skittered off somewhere else, faster than the two’s minds could register.
“...Well, that was effective. Thanks for the save there, Perry,” Noctis thanked Perry, giving him a quick hug before letting go and bringing a hand to his chin. “Hmm...now, if my sister wasn’t lying, she’ll be another...three floors up, after that, it’s not so much a library as a monastery or temple or...whatever you’d call it.”
“Right…” Perry said slowly, panting a little. “Damn… The fuck was that…?” He muttered to himself.
“What was what?” Noctis asked, his ears flicking backwards. Perry shook his head to clear his thoughts.
“Nothing, nothing, don’t worry about it. Let’s just… Continue on,” Perry said, trudging forwards towards the doors again.
Noctis shrugged, “If you have to rest, then rest. Sis isn’t in any immediate danger. I just don’t want her to be here any longer than necessary.”
“No, no, I’m fine, just… Not used to using a weapon like this,” Perry admitted as he opened the doors with a loud creak of their hinges.
“Fair enough. Just go up...those stairs,” Noctis pointed at a set of stairs on the other side of the room after a short pause. “For one more floor, and then another two flights of those inset stairs, and we’ll be on the same floor as my sister.”
“Right,” Perry said, walking into the room, old scrolls and papers crumpling under his boots, book stacks piled high alongside or on most of the bookshelves, desks, and tables.
“...Ya know, Sis always told me about this place in her letters. Said it was the center of Ornia’s magical, historical, cultural, and technological knowledge. It was full of life and ponies learning new stuff, and remembering old stuff...was any bookworm’s paradise. Now...it’s kinda sad, seeing it like this,” Noctis broke the silence that had fallen between the two as they walked the length of the room.
“Yeah? If that’s true, then I bet your sister would’ve loved to see the library I went to all the time in Harvard,” Perry mused as they reached the next set of stairs.
“Harvard? That some ritzy, prestigious institute like this one where the best and brightest go?” Noctis inquired with a slight tilt of the head that looked oddly cute.
Perry nodded, “You could put it that way, yeah. Where I’m from, it was one of a small handful of schools that pretty much led the educational world. The biggest was Oxford, but that was across the ocean from me.” They began walking up the steps, Perry looking around to make sure nothing snuck up on them.
“Heh, your world sounds like a fun place, Perry,” Noctis chuckled.
“Unless you want to count the absolutely idiotic politics and bureaucracy, along with the zealots that still won’t stop going on crusades, then yeah, it is,” Perry said flippantly.
Noctis shrugged, “Ain’t those things a constant in any world that isn’t perfect or a false utopia?”
Perry spared a glance at the stallion. “Did your country create a city destroying weapon that leaves residue behind that can last for hundreds of years?”
“We had a race of them, that was reduced to two, and then to one,” Noctis replied. “They were called Alicorns. Think Unicorns with wings, but with enough magical prowess and affinity to move the sun and moon, warp reality, and were basically physical gods that could die.”
“...I’m not sure whether to believe that or not,” Perry said slowly as they reached the next level. “As a side note, haven’t seen any more of those things in a while…”
“Oh, they were real. The last one is the reason why our world isn’t one big expanse of pure shadow yet. And as for the Gem Spiders, they’re actually fairly smart. Once you hurt one or kill one in sight of another, they’ll let their buddies know that you aren’t easy prey, or that you ain’t worth the risk,” Noctis explained as they reached the final level after getting through another room and up another set of stairs.
“Well, that’s certainly enlightening,” Perry muttered as he searched the final level for any signs of danger.
“Yeah, but enough of that. If my sister’s directions were correct...she’ll be in...that room right there,” Noctis said, looking around for a few moments before pointing at a door with a telescope symbol on a large plaque above the door frame just a ways around the corner.
“Got it,” Perry said with a nod, walking over and pushing the doors open.
The handle of a broom smacked into Perry’s helmet as a woman let out a fearful battlecry, followed by another smack to the head.
The third smack was blocked when Noctis grabbed the broom handle and clucked his tongue, “Tsk tsk tsk, what have I told you about smacking people in the head with a broom, Crepus? I thought our family raised you better than that.”
Perry’s eyes widened at the name. It sounded… familiar, to him, and made him feel warm inside. He looked to see a mare with twilight-blue fur, rich sapphire eyes, and a mane the color of a green Aurora Borealis looking at Noctis with a gaping mouth and watering eyes. A librarian uniform covered her body, though it was quite dirty due to how long she’d probably been stuck up there.
“N...Noctis? Y-You actually came?” the mare now known as Crepus asked in a whisper of disbelief.
Noctis rolled his eyes and poked Crepus’s nose in what Perry could only describe as a ‘boop’, “I always came to help you as a kid, why would that have changed at any point since then? But I can’t take all the credit, since I was stuck under a grate on the bottom floor, near that balcony that overlooks the city. Perripheus here - or Perry, for short, since he prefers that - was cursing up quite a storm right on the balcony when I asked him if he could let me out. He did, I explained what’s happened to our lovely little apocalyptic world, he agreed to help me rescue you, and here we are.”
“...Thank you, P-Perry. I...I’m so glad that you were there to free my brother, and that you agreed to help get me out of here. I...I’m in y-y-your debt,” Crepus stammered sheepishly as she bowed her head and upper torso. Thankfully, her librarian uniform didn’t show any cleavage, otherwise the situation could have gotten awkward.
“Huh? Oh, uh, yeah, no problem,” Perry said, shaking himself from his stupor.
Noctis clapped a hand on the shoulder of the other two people in the room, “Well, now that that’s sorted out, shall we get out of here before something else happens?”
“R-right, just let me gather some of the more important documents I managed to bring in here before chaos broke out. I’m not leaving without them, otherwise I’d basically be leaving our land’s history to die,” Crepus replied as she scurried about the room, carefully folding up a dozen-odd scrolls and carrying tomes to a thick burlap sack laying on a nearby table. Once she had everything put away in the sack, she hoisted it onto her shoulder and returned to the two men. “A-Alright, I’m ready. Let’s go, shall we?”
“Eeyup. Perry, would you mind taking point? You have the heaviest weapon here and you’re most heavily armored, so you can afford to take a few hits, can’t ya?” Noctis suggested.
“Yeah, I can do that,” Perry agreed, sparing another glance to Crepus before hefting his greatsword onto his shoulder and starting to walk. “Let’s go, then.”
The three began to make their descent, going down flight after flight of stairs, the sound of their footsteps against the marble floor echoing in the otherwise silent Institute. The group, Noctis and Perry in particular, kept their eyes peeled for any signs of Hollows or Gem Spiders, but they didn’t see any signs of either...which was a little disconcerting.
“Alright, so, Crepus: How are we getting out of here?” Noctis asked the mare as they reached the second floor.
“O-Oh, right. Well, the main entrance collapsed a month ago, so we can’t exit through there. The amphitheater would be our best chance, since it leads directly to the outside by two exits on either side of the amphitheater stage itself,” Crepus explained.
“I see…” Perry noted. They reached the bottom floor where Perry saved Noctis, and Perry looked around. “So, where to? There’s three ways to go.” He said, motioning to the intersection leading three different ways. A path ahead of the grate, and one on each side.
“That way, down the corridor and through the first door on the left,” Crepus said, pointing to the path on the left side.
“Right, now let’s get going. Perry, lead the way,” Noctis stated with an ‘after you’ gesture.
Perry nodded, keeping an eye out for any more Gem Spiders as they walked down the path, eventually finding another set of ornate wooden doors, which Perry opened.
“Wait, if the amphitheater is indoors, and there hasn’t been anyone around to maintain the candles or lights, and spiders like dark places, then doesn’t that mean that there might be-” Noctis said with mounting realization and horror, his sentence abandoned the instant he laid eyes on the enormous web in the center of the room, hanging off of which was a Gem Spider the size of a dump truck. There was a humanoid upper torso sprouting from where the mouth and eyes would be, and at the very top of a breast-less torso was a spider’s head, its octet of eyes staring straight at the trio with a cold, calculating gaze as its body lowered itself from its web...and the glowing, pulsating sack filled with eggs that looked more at home on an ant queen than a spider attached to its- her abdomen sliding down the web with the rest of her body.
“Oooh, this is bad. That’s a Gem Arachne Queen. She can use High Mage-level magic, is faster than her size would suggest, and we have to go through her if we wanna get out of here,” Noctis said as he slowly reached for the broadsword at his hip. “Absolutely wonderful.”
“Well,” Perry began, grabbing the collapsible crossbow at his hip and unfolding it, letting the two ponies see that it was what looked like a very crude yet complicated repeating crossbow, something that they had only seen designs of. Perry loaded some bolts into its chambers. “Let’s see how she does with this!” He said, before taking aim and unloading a hail of bolts at the Queen.
The Queen simply raised a hand and swept it in a horizontal arc, a massive wave of blue soul magic expanding outwards and colliding with the flurry of bolts, disintegrating them almost instantly before the wave, itself, dissipated. The Queen then raised a brow that Perry hadn’t noticed before and shook her head, her gaze never leaving him.
For a moment, Perry thought he saw a Dark Souls-style health bar appear at the bottom of his field of vision, with the name “Amethysia, the Gem Arachne Queen ” hovering above it, before both things disappeared.
“Yeah, ranged attacks aren’t going to be effective whatsoever unless you do it close enough to her that she can’t use magic without risking getting herself getting hit with the effects of her own magic,” Noctis said as his eyes flickered around the room, locating the exits that Crepus talked about just behind and to either side of the Queen’s web. “Oh, and whatever you do: DO NOT aim for her egg sac or, gods forbid, actually HIT her egg sac. That has been documented multiple times to have sent Arachne Queens of any and all types into berserk, almost psychotic rages. Right now, she’s just testing us. We’ve intruded on her lair, and now we’ve attacked her. She’ll probably wait to see what we’ll do next before she makes her own move, but that doesn’t mean she’ll let us go or try to run to the exits.”
“Well, shit… Old fashioned way, then?” Perry queried, placing his crossbow back and gripping his greatsword with both hands.
Noctis nodded, “Old-fashioned way. Try not to run in a straight line, or else it’ll make it easier for her to cast a spell. And don’t worry about Crepus, she hasn’t attacked the Queen and she’s unarmed, so the Queen won’t attack her as long as she isn’t a threat. On three.”
“W-wait, I can-” Crepus started to say.
“THREE!” Noctis shouted and immediately ran forward, a blue aura surrounding his legs and sword as he charged towards the Queen in a serpentine maneuver. Perry sighed, before following, going for the same maneuver as well.
The Queen immediately shot both hands out to aim at the two charging men, one hand for each enemy, as bright blue-and-white orbs formed above her palms. She didn’t move an inch, save for her hands, which tracked the two with almost unnaturally smooth and graceful motions.
Then, the orbs exploded outwards, twin swarms of dozens of magic arrows flying towards and homing in on Noctis and Perry.
“DODGE AS BEST YOU CAN!” Noctis shouted as he ducked and weaved through the hail of arrows, narrowly avoiding several aimed for his sides and head by a fraction of an inch.
“SHIT! FUCK! ASS! TITS!” Perry cussed furiously, barely dodging the arrows while a few lucky ones managed to scrape his armor, but not dent or gouge it.
“I-I can help you two, I know two Archmage-level spells that-” Crepus tried to offer her help again, only to be cut off by a gem-coated leg hanging itself over her shoulder from behind. Freezing in place, Crepus managed to look behind her to see a single Gem Spider standing directly behind her, with a dozen more hanging above and around the doorway behind her.
“DON’T DO ANYTHING, CREPUS! SO LONG AS YOU DON’T DO ANYTHING, THEY WON’T DO ANYTHING TO YOU! THE QUEEN IS FIGHTING THE ONLY THREATS THEY KNOW OF, SO YOU’LL BE SAFE RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!” Noctis shouted as he leapt into the air and thrust his shield-arm’s palm forward, a shotgun-like spray of magic flechettes flying towards the Queen. Half of the flechettes bounced off or shattered against the smooth layer of gem coating the Queen’s body, though the other half managed to pierce through her front’s armored carapace.
A few small jets of iridescent blue blood shot out of where Noctis’s flechettes pierced through, eliciting a wince and a chittering growl from the Queen as she shot a much larger magic arrow at Noctis, which just barely grazed his leather chestplate.
But, with that distraction, Perry managed to get close, and jumped up onto her and stabbed her shoulder, thrusting his blade in as far as it would go as he uttered a battle cry.
The Queen screamed in an uncomfortably human female voice as she grabbed Perry by the throat and flung him to the ground, his blade coming out of her shoulder as he was sent skidding across the amphitheater floor. The Queen looked at her bleeding shoulder and limp arm, then turned her gaze to Perry and growled menacingly as she raised her good arm and formed a much larger orb of magic that quickly shot out in the form of a heavier soul arrow.
Perry grunted as he pulled himself to his feet, and then had to dodge an arrow of soul magic, rolling out of the way. He was panting a bit, but was still able to fight just fine.
“Fucking bitch…” he cursed.
The Queen hissed at him in response, almost as if she took offense to that.
“Good hit, Perry! If we can disable her other arm, she won’t be able to cast any magic! Then you’ll just have to watch out for her lower body’s legs trying to skewer you!” Noctis called out to Perry as he threw another shotgun blast of flechettes at the Queen, which caused some more minor damage.
“Think you can keep her distracted?” Perry called.
“Whaddya think I’m doing? Just try not to kill her! You do that, and the Gem Spiders will probably kill Crepus as revenge!” Noctis responded, dodging another soul arrow storm.
“Got it!” Perry cried, rushing towards the Queen once more, still going in a serpentine motion.
The Queen reared her head back, then thrust it forward as her mouth opened to unleash a billowing cloud of blue fire that surged towards Perry.
“Shit!” He cried, raising his shield to block it. He grunted as the fire washed over him, feeling the heat very well, but keeping his shield up nonetheless.
The flow of magic flames was cut off as the Queen closed her mouth, panting inaudibly from the mild exertion, but she quickly recovered just in time to form a magical shield between her and the soulforged greatsword that Noctis was swinging towards her. The two magical constructs clashed with an odd warping sound and a shower of blue sparks, and Noctis used the Queen’s shield to jump off from, launching himself a safe distance away from the Queen.
Perry grinned, seeing his opening as he panted more heavily. “You’re wide open, bitch tits!” He cried, before speeding towards her, and slamming his sword into the shield, forming cracks on it.
“You should really stop being so rude, ” the Queen suddenly spoke in a rich, flanged voice as Perry felt something stab through his leg. A brief moment before the pain hit him full-force, he looked down to see one of the Queen’s legs impaled through his leg.
“FUCK!” Perry cried in pain, clutching his wound.
“Yoohoo! Queenieee!~” Noctis’s voice rang out from the Queen’s and Perry’s left, drawing both’s attention to the stallion as a spear made of soul magic finished forming in his right hand. “Here’s a nice dildo for your spider cooch!”
With that, Noctis hurled the Soul Spear at the Queen, the Spear closing the distance between its caster and its target in less than a second as it pierced the Queen’s good arm, making it go limp in an instant. The Queen bit back a scream as she grit her teeth and mandibles together, then looked between her arms and her two opponents.
Noctis, meanwhile, was breathing heavily on his hands and knees, sweat matting the fur on his muzzle as the exertion of casting the Soul Spear took its toll. Perry fell to the ground, the Queen’s leg slipping out of his leg as he clutched it in pain, writhing in agony for a bit.
“Goood!” he cursed. He tried to sit up, but his wound just bled out more. He looked down at it, gritting his teeth from the pain.
A pair of rapidly-approaching footsteps from behind Perry caught his attention, and he turned his head to see Crepus running towards him, “Perry! A-Are you alright?!”
She knelt down by his side and looked at his wounded leg, then took in a deep breath and held her hands to his wound, a golden glow encasing her hands before it flowed into the bleeding hole in his calf. Perry could faintly feel his muscles, nerves, and flesh knitting themselves back together as the pain quickly faded to nothing.
“Is...I-is your leg hurting anymore?” Crepus asked worriedly, looking him over like a concerned mother hen.
“Yeah… Thanks, you’re an angel,” Perry said, slowly standing up.
“Oh, suuure, go help the stranger you just met less than ten minutes ago rather than check on your brother! He’ll be juuust fine!” Noctis panted as he got to his feet, then slowly walked over to his sister and Perry.
Crepus turned towards her brother, suddenly looking very sheepish and finding the ground to be very interesting to look at as she held her hands behind her back, “S-s-sorry, Noctis. I just saw Perry bleeding, and you were only suffering from exertion, so…”
“Relaaax, I was just kidding, Crepe,” Noctis reassured his sister, planting his hand firmly between her ears and rubbing her head, earning an embarrassed whine from her as she tried to bat his hands away.
“You two have bested me, ” the Queen suddenly spoke up, prompting the three of them to look up at the towering Arachne. “If you three wish to leave, then leave. But do not come back here, ever again. ”
“...Very well. Hopefully we never meet again, then,” Perry said, walking towards one of the exits. “Come on, you two.” He said, waving them over.
Crepus and Noctis nodded, walking over to him as Perry pushed the door open to reveal a long staircase leading down and out towards the city proper. The crystals lining the bases of every building glimmered in the dim light of the sun, the marble walls that made them up reflecting the light well, creating quite a picturesque view, even though it was all crumbling and in ruins.
“Seems we have a long journey ahead of us… Especially since I need to find my brothers,” Perry mused, gazing out at the large expanse of the city.
“Aaand you say ‘us’ becaaause…?” Noctis trailed off, then grunted as Crepus dug her elbow into her brother’s ribs.
“Well, I was hoping for some companions, but I understand if you have your own agendas-,” Perry began.
“I’m just pulling your leg, Perry. We’d be happy to tag along. Neither of us have anywhere to go to now, so we might as well stick with the big, strong, hunk of a Knight, eh? ‘Sides, this way I can keep on screwing around with you...and maybe get to some screwing with you, if you’re up to it~” Noctis cut off Perry with a wave of his hand, then giggled in amusement at the sputtering noises that Perry was making.
Perry looked away after a bit, “Eeeyeah… Gonna just ignore that one as well…”
“You like to ignore my advances, don’tcha? Is it ‘cause I’m not pretty enough, my love?” Noctis asked, bringing his face close to Perry’s helmet and fluttering his eyelids suggestively...before he was yanked back by an annoyed Crepus.
“Noctis, you promised you were gonna cut that out two years ago, so stop harassing Perry like that!” Crepus scolded the stallion, who shrugged in response.
“I can’t help it if I like to tease the guy. His reactions are amusing,” Noctis defended himself as they started walking towards the city.
Perry decided in that moment that he was going to try his hand at teasing back, just to see how Noctis would react. He was hoping for something good. “You mean like how it’s amusing when your tail swishes everytime you say those things, like a dog with it’s master?”
Noctis damn-near tripped on himself in surprise, but managed to catch himself and give Perry a mock glare that was only made more amusing by the blush that was peeking through his fur, “W-well, you’re certainly observant...and this shows that you can dish out as much as you can take...I can tell that we are gonna be great friends, Perry.”
“Well, after hanging with two other guys who joke about all kinds of weird shit and make jabs at each other, you pick up some tricks,” Perry said, idly slowing down just to pat Noctis’ head. “Still, you seem like a good dog.” He then sped up again, now in front once more.
“...Oooh, I am going to have so much fun messing with you, you have no idea,” Noctis laughed as he ignored Crepus smacking the back of his head and scolding him once more. Perry chuckled, shaking his head as they walked into the city.
As odd as they were, Perry was glad to have these two with him. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he were alone. And he didn’t want to know.
Author's Note
Yeah, Noctis is pretty fucked up. Funny, though. He's the main reason for the sex tag, what with his constant sexual jokes and innuendos.
Chapter I – Camping Trip Gone Wrong
It was a beautiful day today. The sun was shining brightly upon the vibrant forest below, trees were towering over everything, birds chirping in their boughs. Rabbits, squirrels, chipmunks, raccoons, all were going searching for food, whilst predators like bears, foxes, and coyotes hunted. Flowers were blooming, and the smell and sound of nature was all around. Among all this, in a modest clearing, was a camp. Three tents circled a firepit, and sitting upon various makeshift seats were three men.
One had pale skin, crew cut blonde hair, blue eyes, and a large scar just over his lip.
One had tanned skin, long, black hair with dyed dark blue fringes, and green eyes.
The last had pale blonde, almost silver hair, deep turquoise eyes, and red-highlights at the tips of his bangs.
The man with the scar quietly tore off a chunk of meat from a rabbit’s leg, before swallowing it.
“So, what are our plans for today?” He tore off another piece and chewed before swallowing. “Fishing?”
“I’m fine with it. Not sure if Nox is though, considering how terrible he is at it,” the tanned man said with a mischievous grin.
The silvery blonde growled in mock-anger, “Hey, up yours, asshole! At least I can skin and gut a rabbit without puking my guts out like you !”
“Well excuse me for not being used to killing a cute little animal!” the tanned man rebutted.
“This coming from the guy who works in a butcher shop,” the scarred man replied with a grin.
“I only just started!” the tanned man shot back. He kept his scowl for a good while, before they all erupted in laughter.
“Ahh, why are we laughing again?” Nox asked abruptly, stopping mid-laugh as he was wont to do.
“Because we’re all insane,” the scarred man explained helpfully.“But seriously, what should we do?”
“Well, we could explore that dusty old mansion on the other side of the lake,” the tanned man suggested.
“If you're game for it, Perry, than I am,” the scarred man agreed, before turning to the other among their number. “What about you, Nox?”
“Hmm, let me think: Go into a dusty, rickety-ass old mansion that could possibly fall apart right beneath my feet, thus resulting in me falling to a potentially gory and agonizing death? Sure, sounds like fun !” Nox replied sarcastically, though the look in his eyes easily conveyed that he was really saying, ‘Eh, fuck it, why not?’
“Alright, it’s settled then! To the haunted manor we boldly go!” The scarred man said theatrically, even going so far as to pose.
“After breakfast, Uriel,” Perry, the tanned man, admonished jokingly.
“Yeah, sit the fuck down, dude. You’re embarrassing yourself,” Nox dryly remarked, rolling his eyes at his friend’s antics.
“Fine ...Killjoys…” Uriel muttered. The other two laughed briefly before they all resumed eating. In little more than ten minutes, they were finished and packing a few things for their little adventure. Mainly just flashlights, some food, their knives, all the essentials. Perry then noticed Uriel take a swig of a bottle of Sunny D.
“Dude, that’s like, the seventieth bottle you’ve had today! Where in the hell are you getting them all from!?” Perry wondered.
“Don’t ask me—” Uriel began.
“Oh God, not this again…” Perry groaned, before Uriel did a yawning gesture, stretching his arms and back out.
“—Ask the sun!” he finished.
“...Sometimes I wonder if he legitimately has a fetish for the sun. I’m almost expecting him to say ‘PRAISE THE SUN’ since he loves it so fuckin’ much,” Nox sighed and shook his head, having long-since resigned himself to enduring Uriel’s antics.
“Maybe I do~” Uriel said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
“...You are fucking weird, Uriel,” Nox deadpanned and flicked the man in the forehead, not amused by his companion’s response. “Now, we going to this damn mansion or what?”
“Yeah, let’s go already!” Perry urged.
“Well excuse me for wanting to add some dramatic flair to this adventure,” Uriel pouted.
“Whatever man, let’s just get going!”” Perry said impatiently. And so they set off for the mansion. It was but a short hike up the hill towards the lake, and after renting a rowboat to get across from a kind old man, they made it to the rusting iron gates of the mansion. Perry walked up and tried to open them, only to find them locked tight.
“Well shit. Now what do we do?” Perry questioned.
“Simple, we do this,” Uriel said before kicking the rusted lock right off, causing the gates to open as well.
“Make sure you didn’t get anything lodged in your shoes, otherwise you’d better hope that you’re up to date on your tetanus immunity,” Nox quipped as he cautiously stepped through the now-gaping gateway.
“Pfft, I’ll be fine. Steel toe boots, remember?” Uriel said, waving off his friends worries.
“Nevermind that, look at this place! Have you ever seen this much brass before?” Perry asked, gesturing to the rows upon rows of brass statues, all of robed men carrying hourglasses and holding fingers to their lips in a silencing gesture. Patina covered a fair amount of them, and in the midst of the courtyard lay a brass fountain, though it was dented and the water no longer flowed. Withered ash trees dotted the spaces between the statues, along with many blackberry bushes, now wildly out of control. There were even stone benches and gazebos, all outlined and inlaid with brass.
“Wow, someone really likes brass. And what's with the creepy shushing those statues are doing?” Uriel queried.
“If they start moving around when we’re not looking while shushing us, I’m just gonna start calling them ‘Weeping Librarians’ and run in the opposite fucking direction, you guys’ safety be damned,” Nox deadpanned as he stayed as far away as possible from the statues, essentially sticking to the dead center of the ‘path’ the three friends were walking on.
“Love you too, Noxy,” Uriel chirped. Perry chuckled and shook his head with mirth. As the friends walked down the ‘path’, they took no notice of how the patina on the brass statues seemed to grow. After a short walk, they made it to the front doors, which were, like the rest of the area, lined with brass. The only difference seemed to be that they had strange blue moss covering them.
“Okay, now this is just getting weird. I mean, since when has blue moss been a thing?” Perry queried.
“Who cares, let’s go inside!” Uriel urged before kicking the doors open and, subsequently, knocking them off of their hinges. “Oh. Didn't expect that.” He shrugged before walking in.
“Those doors were long-abandoned, with completely-rusted hinges and probably rotted-through wood. How the fuck could you not expect that to happen, Uriel?” Nox bluntly asked his friend, very much resisting the urge to smack the guy upside the head.
“Well I thought it was reinforced or something!” Uriel shot back.
“Dude, there was moss on them. How could it be stable with moss growing on it?” Perry retorted.
“Oh forget it! Just look at all this, though!” Uriel cried, pointing to the many lavish decorations, like hour glass shaped finial posts, with brass lining the edges of rails leading up the stairs to the second floor. The rug and carpet also had hourglass designs, but also crescents. They were both lined with golden silk and filled in with light blue. A brass chandelier, layered like a wedding cake, hung high above, and strangely enough, the candles were lit. In fact, all the candles around the room were lit.
“Ooookay, that's not weird at all,” Perry said sarcastically.
“Calling it now: This place is either haunted, home to some cult, or is an inter-dimensional hub to other worlds. Or, alternatively, there could be a Jason expy lurking around waiting to kill us. Either way, I’m fucking out of here. Fuck you guys, and fuck this place, I’m out,” Nox said as he pseudo-moonwalked towards the entrance, both middle fingers raised and pointed in front of him with a deadpan expression plastered on his face. But the doors reformed and placed themselves back onto the once broken hinges, and when he tried to open them he got a nasty shock.
“...Welp, anyone got a knife for me to jam through the roof of my mouth? That’ll be relatively instant and painless. If not, just snap my neck right now. I am not dealing with this shit,” Nox said after a few moments, his right eye twitching in a way that the other two men knew after years of being around him was a sign of either unfathomable anger...or the onset of a mental breakdown.
”Many knights have come and gone…” echoed a voice. It was like the sweetest melody, but still rough.
“Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope,” Nox chanted as he clamped his hands down on the door, trying to kill himself through electrocution. Apparently taking note of this, it pushed him back with a wave of blue energy. His cry of “WHHHHY?” followed him as he flew straight into the other two, knocking them down like human bowling pins.
“Ugh…” Uriel groaned. Perry grunted as he pushed Nox off of him.
“What. The fuck. Was that!?” he cried, standing back up.
”But none of them showed the resolve you do… The pure spirit,” the voice continued.
“Oh God, oh God oh God oh God, please no! I hated Saw! I don't wanna cut my limbs off to be free!” Uriel cried hysterically.
“If it meant getting out of here, I’D GLADLY CUT YOURS OFF!” Nox shouted at the hysterical man as, in a last-ditch effort of escape through the sweet embrace of death, he tried to bite through the artery at his right wrist. But a blue light blocked his teeth entry into his flesh.
”Come hither, mortals. And be bound by your coils no longer.” the voice said sweetly, a door on the upper level opening wide.
“...Fucking...Of course. Of course this would happen when we followed you into an abandoned mansion, Uriel! OF COURSE THIS WOULD HAPPEN WHEN I ACTUALLY LISTEN TO YOUR FUCKING SUGGESTION TO GO EXPLORE AN ABANDONED MANSION!” Nox shouted in frustration, his hands reaching for the man’s neck to strangle the life out of him. Perry blocked him, grabbing hold of Nox’s arms.
“Dude, chill the fuck out! This isn't worth killing him over!” Perry said as he struggled to keep Nox from strangling their friend.
“Chill out? CHILL OUT?! We are trapped in a fucking abandoned mansion, and our only way out was opened by some fucking Random Omnipotent Being whose reasons for forcing us into this situation are likely incomprehensible to us feeble mortals! I have every right at this moment to strangle this motherfucker for actually bringing us into this!” Nox snarled, but his arms fell limp in Perry’s hands regardless, the fight in him likely extinguished as he realized the gravity of the situation.
Summoning a surprising amount of strength to wrench his arms free of Perry’s grip, Nox sighed and rubbed the parts that his friend clamped down on, the silver-blonde’s gaze fixated on the floor.
“M-Maybe there's a way out?” Uriel stuttered.
“The fucking cunt electrified the only exit, then flung me away after I tried to electrocute myself to death. Unless you want a repeat of what happened the last time I tried to get through those doors, the only way out is the way that they - who or whatever the fuck they are - wants us to take. Seriously, what fucking compelled that gods-damned packing peanut that you call a brain to bring us here?!” Nox growled at Uriel.
“I… I don't know. I just thought it would be fun. I never thought this would happen!” Uriel said, hanging his head shamefully. Perry sighed heavily.
“Look, maybe he’s right. There might be another way out. I mean, it's worth a try, right?” he suggested.
“...Whatever. Feel free to try, I’ll just be waiting here, contemplating how to spontaneously cease all bodily functions just to spite the fucker who’s keeping us here,” Nox replied, leaning up against the nearest vertical surface and staring up at the ceiling.
With that, Uriel and Perry searched the mansion from top to bottom, trying all the doors save the open one, but found them similarly locked and protected. They tried everything they could think of, but nothing worked. They returned to Nox and sat down, Uriel staring with his face in his hands and Perry curled up in a ball.
“I’m sorry guys… I just wanted to have some fun…” Uriel said, tears threatening to fall.
“...Shut up, and get the fuck off your ass. Same goes to you, Perry the Platypus,” Nox ordered, a hand going to either of his friends’ shoulders and yanking them to their feet. “That fucker wants us to go through the magical fucking door and do what they fucking want us to do? Fine, let’s do just that. But I won’t be doing it because I’m giving up. I’m going to do it so that I can completely fuck up whatever is awaiting us on the other side, as one big ‘FUCK YOU’ to the disembodied voice. You guys up for carrying out the biggest act of spite in our entire lives?”
The two men slowly nodded, Uriel furiously wiping at his tears.
“Yeah, let’s do that. Show that bitch we don't break so easily,” Perry agreed. Uriel nodded, a small smile on his face.
“First one to go through the door gets to be the leader of our soon-to-be ’Three Musketeers’ group!” Nox said half-jokingly, already running up the stairs to the door.
“You’re on!” Uriel chirped as he followed swiftly behind him, Perry lagging behind at a jog.
Having a head-start, Nox made it there first, and he gave a quick one-finger-salute to the men behind him, a smirk on his face, “See you on the other side, minions!”
With that, he jumped through the doorway, being sucked into the inky black darkness. The other two followed him in, and, once inside, the door closed, lock clicking, and the candles lit ablaze, shining light onto three suits of armor, with weapons lined up on either side of each stand.
One suit of armor had a strange visorless feature like a barbute helm, but the slits were so thin that it was still close to being like a visor. There was a solid cuirass on top of a heavy fur and light blue leather coat that protected the upper torso, with chainmail beneath. A set of black leather pants and brown leather boots, likely fitted with chainmail beneath as well if the heavy look to them was any indication, covered the lower half of the bottom. And finally, the gauntlets, which were simple, covering part of the forearm, wrist, and much of the fingers.
Perry approached it in fascination, marveling at how amazing and stoic it looked. “Okay, this might offset the shit we’ve been through in the past few hours.”
“...It’s missing the scar, but otherwise…,” Nox whispered to himself as he gazed at the suit of armor that was Perry was admiring from afar.
Uriel approached a rather ragged and weathered set of armor, made of scales, which looked like those from a very large serpent or reptile, and gilded with gold. It was more of a glorified set of robes, but at the same time, Uriel could easily imagine someone spearheading a charge as they wore this. The set of armor was complete with gold bracelets and anklets, as well as a crown with three long pointed tips, a very large and weathered looking white wig attached to said crown.
“Wow… For something so old looking, it’s really majestic,” he said in awe, placing a hand on the chestpiece.
Nox looked to the final set of armor, seeing the burned and hideously contorted metal, the cuirass being more akin to an ominous ribcage of metal. A fluted spaulder on one shoulder while the rest of the arm was just chainmail with an elbow guard, a gauntlet ending the length of the arm at the hand. The other arm lacked the fluted spaulder of its sister side, but had everything else. The leggings were also chainmail, with kneeguards and boots covering it.
Nox gazed at the worn, battered and partially-melted helm that rested atop the armor he was looking at. The mouthguard was drawn inwards towards the jaw, the ventilation holes appearing vaguely like the teeth of a skull. The visor of what may have once been a fluted helm was melted to the forehead and ridged metal of the helm’s top. Finally, the melted fringes of what looked like a crown were fused to the rear of the helmet.
The worn face of a tired, lonely soul stared back at Nox from the empty eyes of the helm as he lifted it off of the fire-warped armor.
“...How many of you are in there, I wonder…?” Nox mumbled under his breath, before sighing and placing the helm to the side as he began to put on the armor with resignation.
Uriel stared at the crown of his armor, seeing a flash of lightning in it before it faded. He looked around in surprise, as if expecting to feel a bolt of that very lightning behind him, but found nothing.
Perry looked into the visor of his own helmet, and, unlike Nox, saw a pair of terrified eyes in them, which startled him, making him jump. “Okay, I take back what I said about this making up for the shitshow that was the rest of our time here. I am not putting on a suit of armor that has a fucking head in it already!”
“Just pull it out of there. The poor fuck won’t be needing it anymore,” Nox said as he rolled his eyes, securing the right gauntlet of the armor to his arm and clenching his fist to test the flexibility and fit.
“Fuck that! Why in the fucking hell would I take some dead asshat’s armor?! That’s just plain fucking wrong!” Perry argued.
“Uhh… I don’t see a head in there, Perry. You doing okay, man?” Uriel said, glancing at the inside of Perry’s chosen suit of armor.
“What are you talking about, there’s definitely-” Perry began, before turning back to the armor to see that it was empty, only the mannequin’s blank, featureless face greeting him. “...Okay, that’s just fucking… Ugh, forget it, I’ll put it on.” With that, he started to put the armor on, Uriel following his example.
Nox glanced over at Perry, everything save for his helmet now equipped, “You feeling alright, man? Sure you ain’t going crazy?”
“Fuck off,” Perry said with a grunt as he pulled the gauntlets on, then the boots.
“You know we can’t leave, so I can’t exactly do that,” Nox remarked as he donned the helmet, pausing as an odd sensation washed over him the moment the bottom of the helmet made contact with the collar of the chestpiece.
“Shut up. You know what I meant, dickhead,” Perry groused as he finished putting on the cuirass, placing it over the coat.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let’s just get the gear and look for a way out,” Nox grunted, cracking his neck as he grabbed the greatswords and started strapping them to his back. Perry and Ureil did much the same, finding the armor to be simple enough to put on, although all three blinked when they realised there were six weapons each for them, and they only had room for about three.
“...666. Wow. Any more paranormal symbolism ya want to add, fucking Cunt Upstairs?” Nox scoffed and flipped the bird at the roof above them.
They all blinked when they saw a flash of light, and three bags appeared in front of them. “Take these bags, and let your burdens be lifted, if only slightly.”
Nox wasted no time in taking one of the bags and stuffing a long spear with the remains of a jaw stuck near the spearhead, a black shield, and a greatsword made of stone into it.
Uriel and Perry looked at one another, then slowly followed his example and took them, stuffing their remaining chosen weapons inside.
For Perry, a white birch bow, and a greatsword with a broken, bloodied, weathered blade.
Uriel stuffed an arbalest, and a bronze, well decorated crescent axe inside his bag.
The three men placed the bags on their waists, surprised to feel no extra weight from them despite what they held inside.
“So, now what?” Uriel asked.
“Now… Be reborn and unclasp yourselves from your mortal bonds,” that voice said, and all the three men felt next was agonizing burning, electrocution, and petrification.
Then, blackness.
Author's Note
Let this story be reborn anew, much like our three protagonists.