CARMEN PONDIEGO Reaps the Reward of Honesty!
View Online
CARMEN PONDIEGO Reaps the Reward of Honesty!
CARMEN PONDIEGO Reaps the Reward of Honesty!
Author's Note
This takes place after the events of Daring Do and the Gryphon's Quest.
Both Luna and Celestia have an intense sense of justice. They also, from thousands of years of direct experience, have a jaundiced view of Equestria's nobility. In this tale, Luna is solidly on Carmen's side ONLY because the nobles in question have, (as is usual with Carmen) NO PROOF OR EVIDENCE OF ANY KIND.
CARMEN PONDIEGO Reaps the Reward of Honesty!
The traditional big flaming cressets flanking the stout but ornate doors of Canterlot Castle shed flickering light on the line of both new and OLD rich nobility awaiting entrance. The exception was one couple. Baron von Nighthoof, an Alicorn was dressed in his very best formal suit. By his side was a stunning khaki colored unicorn in a world famous trademark fire engine red, form fitting dress. She had a wide brimmed hat sporting a large plume and fashionable small triangular lensed blue glasses.
Around her neck, for all to see, was a copy of one of the marvels of the Ancient World. The legendary no longer, Golden Necklace of Pharow Underrock. The necklace was drawing many a stare. Almost as many as the lovely mare wearing it.
The Door Warden, barely spared them a glance as he demanded in a bored voice, “Invitations please. You may not enter without an invitation.”
The Baron suavely presented their invitations, sealed by Princess Luna herself.
The Door Warden snarled, “Refused! The likes of you could never have got an invitation from the Princess herself! Get …” was as far as he got.
The nearly ethereal voice of Princess Luna cut across him! “You did make it! When I heard that Daring Do was having such trouble in the Gryphon Empire, I was terribly afraid that you would not be able to make it to our charity dance!”
The Door Warden, embarrassed and upset, handed their invitations to the herald inside. The Herald bellowed, “Baron von Nighthoof, Chairman of VILE, the criminal organization! Carmen Pondiego, Master of Thieves and a Commoner!”
Princess Luna tapped the herald on the shoulder. “These are MY GUESTS. If you cannot immediately back up your slander, announce them properly!”
Staring wildly about at the glittering hall of Equestria’s highest nobility, he exclaimed, “It is widely known! They should be in prison cell, not here among decent ponies!”
Princess Luna iced over so totally that she could have flash frozen a volcano. She snarled like a creature of Nightmare at the hapless herald, “Neither Carmen Pondiego nor VILE have EVER been convicted in ANY court for ANY crime at all! Neither Carmen Pondiego nor VILE have ever been brought to trial for any crime at all! Neither Carmen Pondiego nor VILE have ever been arrested or served warrant for any crime at all!
“They HAVE BEEN SUSPECTED in THOUSANDS of crimes! SUSPECTED. Suspicion and a nice Rom Black tea will get you a cup of tea!
“What that tells me is simply this. Every time that some boneheaded investigator can’t solve a crime, he will declare, ‘Carmen did it! Or VILE was involved!’ as means of covering up his incompetence!”
Turning to Carmen, Luna smiled serenely. “Welcome to my Charity Ball, Carmen! Baron, it has been too long since I have seen you in court! Having the chance to be near to such a treasure as Carmen is excuse enough! While mingling, do get good places near the dance floor. I plan to honor my Royal Family, the Rom, by performing the Shehan Ja Rom to start the Ball.”
Carmen curtsied to the Princess. Turning to the herald, who was frantically searching for something, Carmen offered a smile and his portable microphone. “You seem to have dropped this in the recent excitement!”
As he took the missing microphone, he realized that he had just had his head handed to him on a platter, as it were. There was nothing that he could say. Carmen appeared to be completely honest in this thing.
She was now mingling and chatting, completely at her ease among the many nobles there. “What? THIS? You are surely jesting! Of course it is not the Golden Necklace of Pharow Underrock. It is only copy! The original is in the Royal Museum, where it belongs.” She chuckled, “The idea, that I would steal the necklace out of the museum and wear it HERE? Hilarious!”
As she and Baron von Nighthoof circulated, they had many variations of that conversation.
Several of the nobles that Carmen made a point of meeting, appeared to be very worried. The Royal Museum Acquisitions Committee conferred together and sent one of their number on an errand.
Following Luna’s suggestion, Carmen and Baron von Nighthoof had an excellent view as the dance floor was cleared. Celestia and Luna both stepped forth, crowns doffed, dressed in brilliant Rom sashes and beautifully tooled but totally functional Rom harnesses. Celestia took a place. She was holding one of the Rom’s big lyres and had a silver flute gripped in her magic.
As Luna took a starting stance in the center of the dance floor, a raucous voice called out, “Long as you are disgracing us with this stupid dance, put on those Rom Freedoms to complete the farce! You are the Princesses, you can do anything!”
Luna froze. Celestia glowed with rage. Luna replied with words so mild that it took a second to process them. “You are right. We CAN do that. We can break the over 800 year old Traditions of Our Royal Family.
“We CAN remove you from your County, break you to commoner and take all of your accounts and monies whatsoever.
“There is a large difference between what we CAN do and what we WILL do.”
She took her starting pose again. She was greeted by a loud, fart sounding, raspberry. Holding the pose, she called, “Guards! Cap Elliner’s horn and drag him from this place. Do not allow him to walk. Drag him to a common cell and there hold him for tomorrow’s criminal court.”
Kicking and struggling, the count was removed from the ball.
Turning to Celestia, she asked, “Sister, the Shehan Ja Rom, please.”
The lead wail of the flute’s complex music started the dance. The big, ornately carved and inlaid, lyre began its its equally elaborate tune. Luna moved. She floated at times and and spun. At other times her dance was hard driven. Her wings were a compliment to to her every move, sometimes concealing, at others, revealing or framing. Never still.
As Luna danced she narrated the poetic tale of the origin of the Rom. How they had been cast out slaves due to famine and drought in a far land that was no more. How they had been found by a merchant donkey who gave them his all, food, water, guidance and even carrying the band’s weakest in his caravan at the last. How he died of thirst and starvation less than a day from the safety that his sacrifice bought the rest. How three days later, he rejoined the band and has guided the Rom ever since.
Carmen watched and enjoyed the dance. She also circulated some among the other watchers. Baron von Nighthoof watched Carmen and admired the skill that he was seeing.
Luna and Celestia retired and returned to the ball in their royal finery and crowns. An orchestra struck up a tune and regular pony formal dancing began.
Luna was watching Carmen circulate with great amusement. She was listening carefully to Carmen’s many denials about the amazing golden work of art around her neck. Luna was grinning like a bandit.
She saw Count Losup furtively reenter the ball. He was carrying a flat package. He conferred with the others on the Royal Museum Committee, showing them the package. Luna caught a glimpse of gold and nearly laughed out loud.
She nudged Celestia and commented, “If they do it, that is twenty bits or five Butterscotch topped donuts that you owe me!”
Celestia looked at the developing situation and snickered, “I was out of my mind to put my donuts on the line! Money. That is all that you will get! Those donuts are MINE!”
Count Losup approach Carmen. Rudely, he gestured for guards. As they were escorting Carmen from the room, they found their way blocked by a midnight Alicorn. Princess Luna. She had cup of tea gripped in her magic.
Icily, she demanded, “Count, what is the meaning of this? Carmen is MY guest!”
He pointed dramatically at Carmen’s necklace! “She is a Master Thief! She broke into the Royal Museum and stole that necklace! She left this copy to conceal her crime, but I have caught her!”
Luna looked about at the developing crowd and asked dryly, “Indeed? Did you find evidence of the break in? Alarms? Case forced or anything else?”
Uncomfortably, he admitted, “She is a Master Thief. She left no trace but wearing the Golden Necklace of Pharow Underrock to taunt us!”
Luna demanded, “Can you tell the original from the copy?”
He pointed triumphantly at Carmen’s neck! “There! That has to be it! She can’t fool us by that claim that it is a copy! This, that she left in the Royal Museum has to be the copy!”
Luna put the cup of tea in his hooves. “There. You have nothing but suspicions and a cup of tea. Suspicion and a cup of tea gets you a cup of tea!”
Turning to face Carmen, Luna asked gently, “To satisfy this fool and avoid a scene, are you willing to let him have your necklace? You will get the one from the museum.”
The Count Losup snapped, “No! We are going to keep this copy as EVIDENCE.”
Luna pointed out mildly, “Evidence of what? You found no sign of any substitution. I know for a fact that the copy necklace was not finished and presented until over two months after the original was in the Royal Museum. Grata, the Left Wing of the Gryphon Imperial Throne, told me about it in person. She was present and saw it done.”
She turned a kindly eye to Carmen. “Dear, are you willing to switch necklaces to shut this fool up? He has removed himself from my Museum Committee entirely by this nonsense.”
Carmen, acting totally glum, replied, “Daring Do entrusted the necklace to us for auction. She authorized us to make this copy. My dear Baron von Nighthoof put his best workers on it, as you said. It took months. This copy is more precious to me because of its history than the original would be.
“If he insists, he can take it. But only if I get the other.”
He started to simply dump the necklace out of the case onto a table. Luna’s magic caught it. “Copy or not, Count, it is a rare and priceless piece of jewelry. One of these two is a Wonder of the Ancient World. You must return the one that you take to the Royal Museum tonight.”
He held out his hoof authoritatively, demanding, “Hoof over the loot, Thief!”
Luna’s magic slapped his face. “You have created this entire scene out of suspicions alone. You have at no time presented a shred of proof of any sort! Apologize Now!”
Sourly, the Count offered, “I am sorry that I called you a thief.”
Carmen shrugged. “I have been called worse. What hurts the most is that I have been trying to tell you the truth. I have been wearing the copy that Grata saw the Baron give me. It is priceless to me because of its history, even if it is not ancient.”
The Count took the necklace that Carmen had been wearing and packed it carefully into the case. He was about to leave when Luna demanded, “The TEA, Count! Drink the tea. You had suspicions and a cup of tea. That leaves you a cup of tea.”
Luna herded Carmen back to the ball. “Do you know why I invited you to this particular charity ball, Carmen?”
Carmen looked up from fastening the genuine Golden Necklace of Pharow Underrock and replied, “No. We were wondering about that.”
Luna softly replied, “It is for the Royal Widows and Orphans Fund. I know that you are a widow. Wally’s death in that fire was tragic. I know what it cost you, both short term and long, to give up Adora to keep her safe.
“I have a small gift to you from her. She told me something. Because of your support when she was poisoned and all of the other things that she has seen, she wants you to have this.”
Luna’s magic presented Carmen with a small file. “Open it, Carmen. Take a look.”
With trembling hooves, Carmen opened the file. There were original copies of birth and other records for Adora Knapsack Yearling. There was even the legal name change to Daring Do.
Tears in her eyes, Carmen looked up to the Princess. “How? I thought that these were all destroyed.”
Luna smiled. “No. Adora was too attached to the truth to destroy records. She did something almost as bad, though. She misfiled them! If she had not told me, I would never have been able to find them!”
Carmen smiled back and steered them to a private nook, lined with cushions. “Since this ball is for the Widows and Orphans Fund, I have a small contribution.”
She opened her purse, which looked totally ordinary, inside and out. She tipped it carefully. With a small clatter, a pile of rings, pins, ornate chains and other jewelry poured out onto the cushion.
With a conspiratorial grin, Luna’s magic neatly gathered it all up. “My goodness look at all the things that got lost in the couch cushions! I doubt that it could ever be traced!”
Late that evening, when the ball’s guests were going home, Luna confided, “That was the neatest force play that I have seen in a LONG time!”
Carmen gently patted the necklace and nodded, smiling happily. “When she gave VILE the necklace to sell, I promised her that I would not steal it.” Breaking into a huge grin and doing a skippy step, she added, “I kept my promise!”
Luna smiled in return, “I know that the Golden Necklace of Pharow Underrock will be in the best of hooves in your collection!”
~~THE END~~