I Auditioned with Rainbow Dash

by REDPONY writer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Comedy
Length: 2365

A Human auditioned for America's got Talent with Rainbow Dash. Book 1

Follow the story of Rafael Notme as he auditions for the greatest show in America, with a rainbow maned Pegasus.

Cover art is temporary if you can make a new one then by all means do it.
Note: the human tag is technically incorrect as this story does not take place in Equestria.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-10-10 15:30:01 UTC

Nerves and bets

I’m very nervous. I’m at the Chicago America’s Got Talent auditions. Now I don’t really do auditions as I have a fear of rejection.

“Hey, you ok, Raf??” Rainbow Dash asks. She is my partner for the audition, she kinda encouraged me to audition. And before you ask; “Why is Rainbow Dash is in Chicago?” I’m not one to spill my secrets.

“No, I'm fine, still nervous,” I tell her. We are backstage waiting for our turn on a bench, with Rainbow to my right. It was hard not to get noticed by the other people there.

I hear them say something along the lines of “look at the brony ventriloquist.” I ignore them but it doesn’t help my nerves. The room is filled with adults, kids, and pets all waiting their turn to perform in front of the judges. There are some mimes too. And plenty of people carrying instruments, including me.

“Look, Raf, all these, humans, are just as nervous as you. You can’t go through life being nervous.” she lays a hoof on my shoulder.

“Yeah it makes sense,” then the sound of four buzzers rang from the stage. “Crap, *gulp*”

“Yeah that is very loud,” she hugs me when she notices me shivering.

Later on, we get to a part of the backstage where I could see monitors displaying the judges. There is Howie Mandel, the bald germophobic comedian; Heidi Klum, the german model and actress;  Howard Stern, the bush hair radio host; and…

“Oh, crap!” I reach my hands to my forehead, stressed.

“What’s wrong?” Rainbow asks.

“They have a new judge. And I don’t know who it is.” I explain.

Rainbow gives me a smile and says: ”don’t worry, you will do good.”

“Yeah, but, what if this judge buzzes me, I don’t know what they like and what they are looking for. They might think I suck.”

Rainbow seems to get ideas out of nowhere. ”How about a bet?”

“A bet?” I ask, removing my hands from my forehead.

“Yeah, my dad told me that bets make competitions easier,”  she says. I don’t see how bets make things better but I agree with her. “So let’s say for every X or no, you owe me 20 bucks,” she says bluntly.

“Woah, wait! You are betting against me?” I reply in shock.

“It’s just to motivate you, not to do poorly,” she says giving me a silly look.

Great, now not only will I be crashing and burning but now I’ll be crashing and burning with 80 bucks down the drain. Ok, Dash, you want to play that way I’ll play that way too.

“This is my bet that if I don’t get any X’s or no’s,” I whisper my terms to Dash and she immediately blushes.

“WHAT!” she says, now in shock.

I laugh at her reaction. “Well if I have money at stake here, then you should have an equally valuable stake as well.”

“Fine,” she pouts.

A stage manager tells us we have to set up. Rainbow moves to get her cloud ready and I check over my gear. Guitar, stunts bombs, Twilight’s necklace. Ok, everything is there, better make sure I look okay. I head to a nearby vanity mirror to make sure I look okay to perform. As I look into the mirror, I see a white caucasian, with brown hair in a ponytail with long sideburns and the beginnings of a beard. He is wearing a red shirt under a black vest, outlined in red. Blue jeans held up by a black leather belt. Around his neck is a black string necklace tied to a red thick ring in the center, with little red wings coming out of the ring, attached to the black strings.

I can see the stage now, and I’m talking to Nick Cannon, the host, which in a way is like talking to a celebrity. We are talking about that one time he went on stage as a mime. Then later he says, “Well go show them what you got.”

I got on stage and the nerves went into high gear. The stage was in a shape of a male side of a puzzle piece with the end pointing to the judges’ table. I made my way to the point of that puzzle piece.

“Hello there,” I freak out a little inside as Howie greets me. I look up to him the most as I love comedians and Deal or No Deal

“H-Hello.” , manage to get out.

"What is your name?” he asks.

“Rafael.”  Please don’t make that joke. I thought to myself.

“Nice to meet you, Rafael.”

“It’s nice to meet you too,” I reply with obvious nervousness.

“It seems you are nervous.”

“Y-Yes I’m nervous,” I reply. “This is my first time on stage.”

“Oh,” Howie responds. “So I’m assuming you are going to play your guitar for us?”

“Actually it’s just one part of the performance,” I inform him.

“Really?” He asks. “So what is your performance?”

“I think I’ll let it speak for itself.” I put out. To which the audience seem to get excited about.

“Well go right ahead, the stage is yours” he waves for me to start.

I get to the back of the stage to set up. The music I picked for this performance is Rainbow’s theme from the fan made video game, fighting is magic.[youtube=https://youtu.be/DHglQRvbzOc]

I have my stunt bombs at the ready as the music starts.

(0:00) I let the music play a little as I wait for the thunder of the song.

(0:04) I throw the bombs to the side in sync with the music.

(0:06) I start playing the guitar, with the audience getting into the music quickly.

(0:13) Then Twilight’s necklace kicks in and my wings open, getting a reaction from the audience.

(0:18) I launch myself, right over the judges and barrel rolling over the audience, then breaking the roll and continue my guitar riffs. Audience cheering at the fly over. Using this opportunity I extend my wings and fly along the audience's outline, the giving them the chance to see the wingspan. Then heading to the upper level to let the upper floor spectators have a close up. I turn around and  close to the center of the audience. I point to the cloud above the stage.(0:59)

(1:00) Rainbow flies straight towards me right over the judges, startling them.  She orbits around me. Then we fly over the audience together, Her ahead, then me, then her. I enjoy our makeshift race around the audience.

(1:27) I stop on Rainbow’s cloud and she just flies back towards the audience. I continue my guitar riffs as she performs a loop above the audience.

(1:47) I strum, and strum, and a third.

(1:50) Rainbow flies across the judges’ table. In front of their faces. Then pushes her cloud with me on it and I just keep rocking out. The cloud stops over the audience.

(2:02) I swing my right arm and release silver confetti over the audience. Rainbow bucks the cloud back to the stage causing to explode as I set my feet on solid ground. Taking to the air again I hover slightly above the stage.

(2:17) Rainbow orbits fast around me. Creating a mini twister on stage, while I intensify my guitar riffs.

(2:25) we break the twister and fly to the opposite sides of the stage. Both landing and starting to walk to center stage.

(2:34) Rainbow swings her head side to side with the intense music.

(2:41) The final stretch is coming, I let my guitar scream, then another, then I end the music.

We are both panting from the amount of work our wings gave during the performance. The audience gave a little pause as we walk to the center stage, with Rainbow on my right and me facing the judges. I put my instrument on my back for then a loud sound, that’s like glass shattering, echoes, and my wings are gone.

Then the audience just explodes in cheers and standing ovations. I feel like I’m in heaven. I check the board as I didn’t hear a buzzer go off. And sure enough no Xs. I tell that to Rainbow as Nick came up.

“Wow! that was amazing!” He hands me a microphone. “Howie how did you think he did?”

“How did I think he did? More like how did I know how he did. That was absolutely amazing, I mean your timing was amazing. the explosions at the beginning were simply amazing and the special effects were off the charts.”

“Excuse me, special effects?” I question Howie, noticing my confidence.

“Well, I’m talking about all the flying and the puppet.” he points to my partner.

“She is not a puppet,” I state.

“Well what is that thing?” he asks.

“She um...” I stop as Rainbow nudges my leg. Signaling me to give her the microphone.

“Did he just call me a thing?” That question sent a woah our way from the judges and audience.

“Did she just respond to me?” Howie asks.

“Yes, she did.” I reply “she is real.”

“Really?” Howie looks at me with disbelief. With wow coming from the audience.

“We can prove it,” I tell him. “Go touch his head,” I tell Rainbow. She then flies right to Howie and touches his forehead with her hoof.

“See?” she asks him.

Howie just looks at her. “Wow she does look real.” he then pokes her nose.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“Oh I’m so sorry.” he apologizes.

“It’s ok, I forgive you.” she then jumps onto his head. “Why don't you have any hair?”

“I.. Well..?” she caught him off guard. Which caused the audience and other judges to laugh.

“You don’t have to answer that. I’m just messing with you. Because I’m awesome!!” she waves to the audience who cheers for her. She then flies back to me and lands on my shoulder.

“Wow, I guess she is real. “ Howie claims.

“Well, DUH! Where were you the last three minutes?” Rainbow replies.

“If she is going to talk, can’t you get her a headset?” I ask Nick. A manager came and gave Rainbow a headset.

“Let's see how the judges voted.” Nick turns to the judges.

“Don’t forget our bet,” Rainbow whispers to me.

“I was going to remind you,” I reply.

“Howie?” Nick asks.

“Well it’s just amazing what you did today and the fact that it wasn’t done with special effects, makes me want to see you again.”

“I was hoping this would be a one-time thing. but we could try something new next time.” I reply.

“Well, then it’s a yes from me!” the audience shows their approval of Howie’s yes.

I made a mental note. Ok, that is 20 bucks I don’t have to give to Dash. And I give Rainbow a fist bump which she hit with her hoof.

“Heidi?” Nick asks.

“The music wasn’t something I really liked.” That earned her a few boos from the audience. “But I did love the fact that you had a cute partner with you.”

“I’m not cute!” Rainbow pouts, crossing her fore hooves. It got worse as Heidi awed at Rainbow’s pout.

“Anyway, I would like to see you and your partner again. So it’s a yes from me.”

I made another note: OK 40 bucks I don’t have to pay Rainbow! We both cheer along with the spectators.

“Howard?” Nick asks.

“Just so I’m clear on this, what exactly is she?” Howard asks.

“She is a pony pegasus,” I answer.

“And does she have a name?” he presses.

“I’m Rainbow Dash! Best flier ever!” throwing her hoof in the air.

“Ok, Rainbow Dash. Does this belong to you?” He lifts up a blue feather.

"Oh! ha.. ha... Sorry about that,” she replies sheeply. Rubbing a hoof behind her head.

“Oh, it’s no problem. I just was going to criticize the prop. but now that I know you are, “real”, may I keep it?” he asks.

“Sure,” Rainbow cheerfully replies.

Wow! Howard wants her feather? That is amazing!

“Besides the feather. I have to say your performance was spectacular. It was like I was in another world where this kind of performance was normal. I want to see you again. So it’s a yes from me too.” the audience roars for his yes.

Omg Howard said yes! Now that's 60 bucks I don’t have to pay Rainbow. Rainbow flew off and is hovering in the air in anticipation of the final vote. The tension is high as Nick asks the last judge, the one I didn’t recognize.

“Anon, what did you think of Rafael’s and Rainbow Dash’s performance?”

NO

Well, I guess I can’t win them all. “Thanks for your input.”

Rainbow gives me a nudge and whispers: “That’s 20 bucks, better pay up.” I went for my back pocket and pulled a wallet and gave her 20.

“Looks like you got 3 yeses, that means you are going to next round. Hey what are you doing?” asked Nick.

”We had a bet going on and she won,” I tell him.

“What kind of bet?” Howie asks.

“She bet that I would get an X or no. and I bet that wouldn’t.”

“Oh, so you are betting on AGT?” Heidi asks.

“Oh please, I learned that bets help competitions,” said Rainbow as she put away the money.

“Anyway, thanks for watching,” I say as we walk off stage.

YES

I raise my arms up at that sound. OH! that sweet sound of a forth yes! I regret raising my arms as Rainbow tackles me, Sending me back a bit.

“I can’t believe you did it! You got all 4 yeses!” she says as she hugs me.

I enjoy the audience’s collective awe as Rainbow hugs me, She pulls away while still in my arms, “So, you won the bet,” she says a little quiet, almost like how Fluttershy would have said.

I rub her cheek, which gives a reaction by the audience and judges.

“Don’t tease them,” Rainbow tell me.

“I wasn’t teasing them,” I say as I kiss her.