Love's First Bruise

by averageamazingme

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 8448

Love is in the air and Lovely has something to say about it. It's up to Bruiser to either take her advice or find his own lovely story.

Bruiser stumbles out of the gate on his first big crush, but with a family containing a romance novelist, a biographer, a guard, an architect, a designer and a flyer, there's a wealth of experience from which to pull. While advice is nice, it'll be the precision of his decisions that'll make this flame grow or blow.

A Side Story of Life in the Fast Lane

Published 2016-06-09 20:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-06-17 07:34:25 UTC

Lovely Intervention

"Life Story!" Lovely declared as she walked into her son's home, grandson in tow. Her horn was lit as she scanned for signs of her son. Sheepishly, Bruiser tried slowing her down, but kept failing to get her attention. The foyer produced no results, and from this vantage point, she couldn't see Life in the living room, family room or the dining room. With a cursory glance towards the den, she ruled that out as well and extinguished her horn. Returning to the main stairs, she gazed over the family room and into the kitchen, to no avail. With a snort, she stormed upstairs.

Quite behind the two, Second Story finally made it into the house. Looking at his grandson, he slowed his breathing and tried to look reassuring. "Has she found him yet?"

Bruiser walked over and buried his head in his grandfather's chest. Second sighed, taking off Bruiser's hat so it wouldn't get rumpled. "This is so embarrassing." The colt muttered. "All I did was ask one simple question and then...this!"

Settling to a seated position with a sigh, Second blocked out the sound of Lovely opening and shutting doors upstairs. Lifting a forehoof, he rubbed Bruiser's neck in a manner he hoped was comforting. When the colt didn't protest, Second drew a breath and composed his thoughts. "Your grandmother--"

"Nana." Bruiser corrected in a detached deadpan.

Second smiled, Lovely was completely devoted to her grandson, but absolutely hated the term grandmother. With her vibrancy and exuberance, Lovely considered herself to be too young to be a grandmother. At the moment, Second felt every bit like a grandfather. "Right. Your nana has some very strong opinions when it comes to this subject. She's not mad, really, just concerned that your parents aren't teaching you about something she considers vital."

Emerging from the door behind the kitchen, Life caught sight of the pair near the stairs. Light from the stained glass window shone in colored brilliance over the two. The blues and reds painted the lighter coat of his son while the colors seemed to mostly be absorbed by Second's black coat. "Dad? I didn't expect you guys back so soon. I just got home from Colteau's studio."

Second turned his gaze onto his son. Life stood in the waning light coming from the breakfast nook next to the kitchen. The sunset cast rays of gold down over Life, making the red in his coat stand out and the white shirt he wore took on the same brilliance. "Son, your mother is looking for you. It's about Bruiser."

Second realized instantly that he'd worded that poorly. In spite of his architectural brilliance, even working on the house they now stood in, Second's grasp of tact and diplomacy was poorly undeveloped. "Uh, he's fine! But, well, he asked a question and Lovely was...alarmed that he didn't already know..." Bruiser's head buried deeper into Second's chest, which served to only intensify his distraction.
Life tilted his head as he started to walk towards Bru and Second. "Dad, I don't understand. What--"

Suddenly, Lovely emerged from the secret door in the family room that led to the service stairs. Immediately, she caught sight of Life and marched promptly over to him. Sensing impending doom, Life scuttled backwards, only succeeding in slipping on the tile floor and coming to an undignified rest sitting with his back against the refrigerator.

Lovely poked her hoof right in Life's face. "YOU haven't taught your son about love!"

Life's eyes widened, and he looked over Lovely's shoulder to get a better look at Bruiser. Could it be? Was his son actually experiencing his first love? The colt still seemed so young. Noting his lack of attention, Lovely jabbed her hoof into Life's nose. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Uh, well. Could we sit down over a nice cup of hot chocolate and talk about this?" Life asked, trying his best disarming smile. His mother was immune.

Narrowing her eyes, she regarded him for a moment before sighing. "Cinnamon, two sugars, and a bit of vanilla."

As she withdrew, Life relaxed and stood. "Yes, ma'am. Dad, Bruiser, come on over. I think Div out to be home sometime soon." Gathering a kettle and cups, Life set to putting water on to boil.

Practically on cue, Div walked in, still wearing his Royal Guard armor. Taking one look at the faces of the assembled ponies, Div sighed and removed his helmet. "What did Life do this time?"

Setting the kettle on the stove, Life huffed and walked over to retrieve the helmet from its resting place on the chair. "I resent that. You're as responsible as I am this time around, Mr. Guard."

Kissing his husband's temple, Div started unbuckling various armor pieces and setting them on the stand in the room. "Well, whatever it is, we'll just have to see about convincing your parents to do it for us."

Life snorted, praying that his mother hadn't heard. Helping his husband by levitating a few pieces of armor onto the stand, he planted a kiss on Div's cheek and responded, "Apparently, somepony is in love."

"Even more every day," Div replied, now free of his armor and gambeson. "Think they'll mind a sweaty guardspony?"

"Go take a quick shower, we'll still be here when you're refreshed." Life said.

Div smiled and planted another peck. "I don't envy you. I'll be quick." With a bound, Div disappeared up the service stairs.

Turning back, Life felt the heat in his cheeks as he saw Lovely, Second, and Bruiser staring at him with amusement, approval, and embarrassment. "Can't a pony greet his husband without a spectator section?"

Lovely looked down at her hoof, inspecting it minutely. "Seems to me that somepony knows about love and isn't sharing the benefit of his knowledge with his son."

Life decided to play it off. Strolling back to the ponies assembled at the kitchen bar, he nudged Bruiser with a hoof and smiled at his parents. "I think Bruiser sees enough of the 'benefits' of my love. He gets so embarrassed just by us kissing." Bruiser looked up at him balefully.

Second laughed, but Lovely wasn't as amused. "You know exactly I mean, young stallion. How have you not at least gone over the basics of sexual relations?"

Life's cool was officially blown. By no set of circumstances was he ever prepared to talk about that with his mother. "Mom!" He protested.

Bruiser's head hit the countertop with a dull thud. For his part, Second seemed to be as amused as before.

"How did this even come up?" Life asked rubbing his face with his hooves.

Lovely looked directly at her husband, who had the grace to look somewhat ashamed. At the very least, Second avoided eye contact with his wife, which was indictment enough. After a moment of silence, Life caught on and looked at the black stallion. "Dad?"

Second cleared his throat and nudged Bruiser. "Maybe he should hear it from you."

Bruiser lifted his head off the counter and stared at us bleakly. "Fine. Dad, grandpa asked if I had anypony at school who was interested in me. I didn't understand what he meant. Nana overheard and wouldn't let up until I told her I wasn't interested in any other colts."

"Not that we would've had a problem if he did," Lovely broke in to clarify. "It would be understandable, given the example at home."

His eyebrow twitched, but Life decided that comment wasn't the hill he wanted to die on today. Turning back to Bruiser, Life nodded. "Go on."

"It's...just not a big deal. Okay? I don't know why we're making such a big deal about this!" Bruiser cried out, letting his head fall back down into his hooves.

"Mom!" Life started.

"Me?" Lovely asked, defensive. "I'll have you know that your father was no help either!"

"Out of all of us, you have the most experience with love. Instead of just teaching him about it, you've gone and turned this into a three-ring circus and I still don't understand why this is a problem!" Life said, annoyed.

"Your son has a crush!" Lovely replied.

Life threw his hooves up. "Great!"

"With a filly in his class!" Lovely said, meaningfully.

"Couldn't be happier!" Life insisted. "Still not getting the point."

Lovely put a hoof to the bridge of her nose. "He doesn't know what to do."

"And you couldn't have told him?" Life asked as the kettle whistled.

"Told him what?" Div asked as he came downstairs, towel over his mane.

"Bruiser has a crush on a filly in his class." Second said, distributing the drinkware and accoutrements calmly from his seat magically.

"Oh, congratulations, Bruiser." Div said, nudging the colt with a free hoof.

Lovely stood up. "He's been accidentally harassing this poor filly because of all the play-fighting you two do around him. She's likely ended up in tears because of it. And you oblivious stallions...well, I just..." Lovely seemed to be short-circuiting until she took a breath. "All this even after I wrote that series about a young pair of heart-throbs. Do any of you actually read my books?"

The stallions in the room all looked at each other, and then anywhere other than Lovely. Life turned back around to adjust the kettle. Div covered his face with the towel as he pretended to finish drying off. Second inspected a spoon down to the finest detail and Bruiser returned his head to its former position on the counter. Taking a deep breath, Lovely sat back down and let it out in a hiss.

"Do you mean all the way through?" Life asked, doling out the hot chocolate. The other three stallions looked at Life with fairly similar expressions before near simultaneously planting a hoof against their foreheads.

Lovely stared at him as well, but her expression was less like a jolt and more like daggers. Clearing his throat, Life closed his mouth and concentrated on filling his mother's hot chocolate order.

Presenting the finished drinks to those assembled, everypony sat in awkward silence as they blew across their respective cups.

"Not all of my books are...sexually charged." Lovely said, reproachfully. Naturally this also drew a reaction. Bruiser and Div scalded their tongues while Life and Second set their cups down with audible clinks.

"Lovely!" The adult stallions protested.

"I'm just saying, I've branched out from just Barleyquin novels. That series I mentioned was Pure Leaf Press, after all." Lovely replied, sipping from her cup.

"So, the expert in love is right here!" Life said, brandishing a hoof at Lovely.

Lovely looked around, the other stallions and colt looked on in agreement. "I hardly think it appropriate to lay this at my door, dear."

"Actually, Life might have a point." Div said. "We didn't date much in school and really only had a flame for each other. Our courtship was also hilariously brief, once it started."

Second nodded. "I'd gone to many parties with Hardy before the one where I met you. But I never dated anypony beside you, dear. Out of all of us, you've had the most relationships. Good and bad."

Lovely looked directly at Life. "You expect me to teach your son all about love?"

Life shook his head. "Not all about it, just what you've experienced. Give him the benefit of your wisdom."

"And what about sex education?" Lovely asked primly. The stallions let out a collective groan.

Life looked at Div. "You had older brothers, Bruiser. Did they teach you anything about sex or love?"

Bruiser covered his eyes. "One of my brothers had a magazine with mares...displaying themselves. But then he bucked me out of the room and threatened to kick my flank black and blue if I ever said anything to dam and sire."

Second laid a hoof across the colt's shoulder. "Have you noticed any changes? Like, feeling different or maybe jittery around fillies?"

Bruiser looked around at the four adults in the room and sighed. "It gets a little hard-I mean, eh-difficult to think around her. And I run a lot. Like, a lot more than I used to."

"Mom, it could really help him. Please?"

Lovely sighed. "I'm still not sure you're not shirking your parental responsibilities, but fine. He's off next week for break, yes? We'll go over the finer points then. Until then, answer any questions he has for you. Even the uncomfortable ones! And let him know it's normal. Oh, and go over how to properly behave around a lady."

"Yes, ma'am."

Bruised Ego

The Story home in the Spireside district of Canterlot was an impressive feat of architecture. Partially built into the side of Alicorn Spire, the exterior façade was almost futuristic in its use of elegant high quality metalwork, but brought out a traditional side as well with stained glass. It was a marvelous melding of both Second's design prowess and Lovely's fixation with beauty.

Silver Platter opened the front door as soon as Bruiser set hoof on the front step. "Master Bru, it is quite a pleasure to see you. Your nana is in her solarium, as usual. Shall I bring in some tea? Master Story has grown quite fond of a black tea from Hossam."

"No thank you, Mr. Silver. Maybe just some juice," Bruiser asked, hastily adding on, "Please?"

Silver nodded warmly. "Of course, off you go."

"Thanks again, Mr. Silver!" Bruiser called over his shoulder.

He slowed down as he approached Lovely's solarium. As one of few rooms lit mostly by natural light, the indoor garden had a unique feel. Taking care not to step in anything he would track onto the carpet later, Bruiser made a circuit around the room before finally noticing Lovely tending a few bushes. "Nana Story, I'm here!" He announced.

Lovely lit up as she extracted herself from the foliage. "So you are! Give me a hug, you little stud."

Smiling, Bruiser leaned in, to be engulfed in the scent of earth, green, and the slight hint of lavender that Lovely used lately in her mane and coat care. As he leaned back, Lovely tipped his hat up so she could see his face. "Now, tell me what your fathers taught you about conducting yourself around a lady."

Bruiser swept his hat off and answered dutifully. "A young stallion of breeding ought only to touch a lady as necessary to be a gentlecolt. His words should be soft and sweet and if he should have any problem with a mare he must always remember to treat her with respect."

Lovely wiped her hooves on a nearby towel and looked him over. "So why did you forget yourself and start acting like a little scamp?"

Bruiser hesitated before mumbling. "I don't know."

"Come on, Bruiser, I'm just trying to figure out what's going on in your head when you talk to this filly." Lovely persuaded as she gently led the colt over to a bench. "When you want to talk to somepony but can't find the right words at the time, it might help to think of the conversation ahead of time. You plan out what you're going to say and maybe even guess on what their reaction would be. So tell me about her."

"She's got a beautiful glossy coat and her mane is just...amazing. Her laugh is contagious and she has a group of friends she's with most of the time." Bruiser answered. "Whenever I see her, I just kind of freeze up and don't know what to say. So I end up saying something rude or mean like dad and daddy do when they're flirting. Except it doesn't work."

Lovely pressed her lips together and hummed as she sighed. "Hmm, yes. Well, your fathers are both stallions, so they would be a bit more macho in their flirting. Not to mention they were friends for so many years before they became...involved. So they're relationship can weather a few petty and absurd squabbles. Young love must be tended more carefully."

"So...how is this going to work? I'm not going to have to read, like, all of your books, right?" Bruiser asked sheepishly.

Rolling her eyes, she laid a foreleg around his neck and hugged him sidelong. "No. We'll reacquaint you with the rules of courtly behavior. Your manners have definitely slipped, even Life admits it."

Silver entered, rolling a table laden with drinks for two. Following behind in the glow of his magic was a set of chairs. "Hossam chai, with your usual condiments, Madam. And apple juice with a selection of cookies I made personally."

Bruiser doffed his hat and bowed his head slightly. "Thank you, Mr. Platter."

"Will there be anything else?" Silver asked, setting the two chairs out.

Lovely stepped to take her place at the table. Silver made to push in her chair, but she held up a hoof. "That will be all, Silver. The young master needs a refresher course on proper comportment." Silver nodded to them both and took his leave.

Turning back to Bruiser, Lovely smiled. Stepping forward, Bruiser helped her into her seat and scooted it forward. Bruiser took his seat and tried not to drool at the smell of Silver Platter's cookies.

Lovely busied herself with the tea as she spoke."I think if this is going to work at all, we'll have to agree to be completely honest with each other. You tell me what you're feeling and I'll try my best to explain it so you're not confused. And I'll tell you things like an adult. But, I'll be frank with you, you're going to be making most of the decisions here. Whether or not you listen to me, whether or not you're honest, and whether or not you want to pursue any given relationship; all of that is up to you and, eventually, the pony you're with. Does that make sense?"

Unfortunately, the question came right after he'd made a selection and while his mouth was full. Taking a moment to clear his mouth, Bruiser took a sip of juice and wiped his lips before answering. "Yes, ma'am."

"Good. So here's what I want to know first," Lovely said as she stood. "What have you noticed about her?"

Bruiser fidgeted on the bench. "Well, she's pretty."

Lovely only just managed not to roll her eyes. "I think you mentioned that. Good. Pretty. And?"

Bruiser swallowed to wet his dry throat. "She's a pegasus. She's on the flying team at school and she's one of the best."

Lovely nodded. "So, have you gotten to know her very well or is this a..." She searched for the right words for a moment. "Basic attraction?"

Bruiser winced at the term. "She reads Everfreeworld."

Smiling, Lovely tapped her chin. "By Apple Gait? So she has some taste in novels. Do you suppose she would read my stories?"

Eyes open in shock, Bruiser shook his head. "Nana. No."

Tilting her head at his vehemence, Lovely suddenly rolled her eyes skyward and snorted. "Not those stories, Bru. The new ones that...that none of my loving family has deigned to read. I do have young adult novels that are suitable for all ages."

"Oh." Bruiser scratched one hoof with another absently. "Well, maybe."

"So you should apologize for sure. But there is something else to put a ribbon on top." Lovely beckoned him forward and they walked back out of the solarium.

***

"Lacy Feathers, may I talk to you for a moment, please?" Bruiser asked the pegasus as she walked out of class. Her friend looked dubious, but Lacy actually looked at Bruiser and caught his expression. More than that, his ever-present hat was in his hoof, so she could actually see his face. Curious, she nodded to her friend and gave Bruiser her full attention.

"Make it quick, I have flight practice today." Lacy said.

"I wanted to say sorry for how I've been acting around you. I've been pretty stupid." Bruiser said. "I noticed that you read Apple Gait's Everfreeworld. My grandmother writes too, and I wanted to give you this." He held a book.

Taking it in hoof carefully, she opened the title page. "You're grandmother is Lovely Story?"

Hesitantly, Bruiser shrugged. "Yeah."

"It's even written to me!" Closing the book, Lacy brightened and held it to her chest. "I love her new books. My mom won't let me read some of her other books, but I've gotten every book in this series except this one. I didn't think it was out yet!"

Bruiser smiled. "It's not. This is fresh out of the presses. Nana gets a few early every time. I'm glad you like it." He turned away, returning his hat to his head.

"Hey, Bruiser, wait." Lacy called.

Turning around, Bruiser replied. "What's up?"

"This was pretty cool of you. If you're that serious about being sorry, well apology accepted." She held out her hoof. Smiling, Bruiser gave her hoof a shake and turned to walk away again.

"Hey!" Lacy called again.

"Yeah?" Bru asked, turning halfway around.

"A bunch of us are heading to Sunridge bakery in Prominence after practice. If you're not doing anything, maybe you can come along?" She asked, batting her eyelashes.

"Yeah, that sounds like fun." Bruiser said, as his eyes connected with hers.

She smiled. "Cool."

Bruiser smiled. "Great."

"Awesome." Lacy said as their gazes held. Unseen by either, Lacy's friend rolled her eyes and coughed.

Bruiser noticed first. "Uh, your practice?"

Looking at the wall clock, she gave a little start and looked at her friend. "Right, well, it's usually about an hour long, so I'll see you then!"

Bruiser waved. "See ya!"

With his own after-school running to do, Bruiser locked up his bag and trotted over to the running club. Stretching out on the school's running track with the other runners, Bruiser took a look up and smiled. From here he could see the flying club and even hear the flight coach whistling and calling out. Properly limbered up, he started down the circuit and mostly stayed with the pack for the first few laps.

"No-name blank-flank!" The lone pegasus on the running team called from behind him.

Ignoring him, Bruiser sped up a touch.

The pegasus moved to keep pace, but had some trouble getting around the pack of other runners. "Hey, don't ignore me, you patchy little brat!"

Bruiser snorted. "If you have enough breath to run your mouth, Breezy Feathers, then you can catch up and say whatever you want to my face." The other runners around them snickered.

Undaunted, Breezy slowed enough to get out and then slip around the pack. With obvious effort, he caught up with the two tone earth pony. "I saw you talking with my sister, Loser." Breezy said briskly. "Why don’t you just leave her alone?"

Bruiser sighed. "I was apologizing, Brees."

"About time, you loudmouth brat." Bree quipped.

Bruiser put on a bit more speed. "I'm not going to fight with you, Bree."

"Yeah, you should be scared of me." Breezy responded as he strained to keep up. Only a few runners were around them now.

Bruiser scoffed, his breathing still unaffected by his new pace. "My dad's a royal guard, Bree. He taught me how to fight."

"Yeah? Your dad's a royal disgrace. He's one of those night guards who works for Celestia's little sister, Loony." Bree huffed between phrases, but kept up with Bruiser.

Unfortunately for Bree, they weren't alone. "Bree, shut up about Princess Luna or I'll tell the coach myself," One of the other runners, a unicorn Bruiser recognized by face but not name, warned the lone pegasus. "Although if this is what it takes for you to run like Bruiser, maybe I'll start talking to your sister too."

Bruiser laughed, keeping pace with the older pony as both left Breezy Feathers in the dust. As they finished and stretched once more, the unicorn colt sat near him. The older colt reminded Bruiser of Life, but a near metallic shade of blue instead of red fading to black. Bruiser noticed the colt staring at him with his teal eyes. Finally, he stretched over and held out a hoof to Bruiser. "Teal Twister. My friends call me Twist."

Bruiser shook hooves, laughing as Twist pulled him over. "Bruiser. Friends call me Bru."

Twist nodded. "I know. You're one of the better runners on the team. What's up with you and Lacy? You actually apologized?"

Bruiser frowned. "You know Lacy?"

"We grew up around each other. Our parents are friends since they were in school." Twist explained. "So?"

"Yeah, I guess I just realized how much of an idiot I was and figured I had to make it up to her." Bruiser said.

"Forgive me for asking, but you look a little too old to not have a cutie mark." Twist said, looking down at the tornado on a race track on his flank.

"Guess I don't know what I want to do with my life yet. I'm still young." Bruiser said, trying for a nonchalant tone.

Sensing the awkwardness in the air, Twist let it go. "If you ever get teased too much, just let me know. Bullies really bother me. To tell you the truth, when you were bothering Lacy, I almost cracked down on you."

Bruiser looked down to hide his face. "Why didn't you?"

Twist shrugged. "Lacy told me not to. She had a feeling you didn't mean to sound rude; I guess she was right."

"I guess so." Bruiser agreed.

Coach Shoes interrupted the group of runners. "Alright everypony, good practice. Time's are definitely improving, but some of you slacked off over break. So that means you'll be training harder and smarter from now on if you want to make it to the meets. Hit the showers!"

"Yes, sir!" Everypony replied.

Lovely Sweets

"So, if you're friends with Lacy, why did you tease Breezy about talking to his sister?" Bruiser asked as he toweled off his mane.

In the middle of a drying spell, Twist looked over. It was a little funny, because Twist's shaggy mane kept getting blown around in the magical field as he spoke. "There's a difference between talking to his sister and talking to his sister, if you catch my drift."

He didn't, but Bruiser nodded anyway. "Are you going to Sunridge after this?"

The drying spell left Twist's bangs covering his eyes. Lifting them with a hoof, the unicorn colt looked at him with brows raised. "Oh? She invited you to Sunridge with us? You really must have had a good apology. Yeah, there's a pretty tightly knit group of us headed over there. Don't expect everypony to be okay with you right off the bat."

Bruiser shrugged. "That's fair enough, I guess. Thanks for the warning. Anypony in particular I should be worried about?"

Twist looked at the mirror over the sink and primped. There really was no other word for it. "You've already met the worst. Breezy is really protective of his sister, even though he's younger. They're pretty close, so Lacy's group and Bree's group all come together at least once a week. Sometimes it's Sunridge, sometimes we go all the way to Sol Market for Pony Joe's. We went to Upper Cliffside to watch the sunset, once. But we almost got in trouble for going so far and staying so long."

Bruiser smiled. "My dad's mothers live in Upper Cliffside, the view is really amazing."

"Mothers?" Twist asked, one eyebrow quirked.

Mane finally dry, Bruiser put his hat on to cover his expression. Hopefully, his new friend wouldn't mind such relationships. "Yeah, my dad was adopted by two pegasus mares."

"Is he a pegasus?" Twist asked, leading the way out of the locker room.

Bruiser shook his head. "Nope. Earth pony like me. My other dad is a unicorn."

Twist looked up, putting the pieces together. "So your dad has two mothers. You have two fathers. How do you feel about all this?"

Bruiser looked over, drawing Twist's gaze. "It's way better than my old family. I have two sets of grandparents who love me. Two parents who love me. My old family...wasn't so nice." Bruiser ducked his head and wiped at his cheek to hide the tear.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't know. But," Twister turned his foreleg to show Bruiser a long thin scar near the top. "I know about families that aren't so nice." Noting the surprise, Twist clarified, "I'm safe now, thank Celestia. My aunt and uncle are pretty cool."

"So, you're okay with...weird families?" Bruiser asked.

Twist sighed. "If you had any idea how weird my family was..."

In a blur, something dropped out of the sky. Twist turned to see it just in time, raising a shield in a futile attempt at saving himself.
Unfortunately, the assailant crashed through the shield and tackled Twist to the ground. Bruiser blinked and found Lacy on top of Twist, pinning him to the ground and mantling her wings at him. "You're not being mean to him, are you Twist?"

"Wha?" Twist asked, groaning in pain and confusion.

Lacy leaned in. "You know I told you to leave him alone! Bruiser even apologized today."

"Lace, seriously? Yeah, I know. Now let me up." Twist said, huffing in annoyance. "If you're gonna tackle anypony, go find your brother. He was a total snot at practice today."

With a sweep of her wings, Lacy fluttered away from Twist and closed on Bruiser. "Bree doesn't mean it, Bruiser. He's just being protective."

Sighing from his place on the ground, Twister mumbled, "No, that's okay. I'm fine."

Another pegasus landed near Twist and helped the unicorn to his feet. "Jeez, Lacy. You really bowled him over to protect your coltfriend." The new pegasus started brushing the dust off of Twister.

"No-oh! Tickles. Watch the feathers, Cheery!" Cheery laughed and concentrated on Twist's belly. "Cheery!"

"He's not my coltfriend, Cheery Meadows!" Lacy said, garnering no attention from the mare in question. "Hey! Why don't you stop flirting with your coltfriend?"

Cheery let up as Twister fell to the ground to try to escape. "Twister! I just got you cleaned off and now you're all dirty again! Come here!"

Lacy sighed as Twister rolled away, patting playfully at the invading feathers. "We'll get to Sunridge eventually, Bruiser. These are my friends. I guess you've met Teal Twister, so that's Cheery Meadows. They're both a year ahead of us, but as you can see, not much more mature." With the ongoing antics, Bruiser had to agree.

"I really am sorry about Breezy, but maybe you two can make up on the way to the bakery. He's got a unicorn and earth pony friend that come along too. Earth pony is Dusty Chestnut. Unicorn is Ginger Glow. Dusty is cool, Ginger kind of has a not-so-secret crush on Breezy. We pretend not to notice and Bree is remarkably oblivious." With a smile, Lacy pushed the front of Bruiser's hat up with a wing.

Blushing at the sudden attention, Bruiser's brain stuttered to a halt. This was the danger zone Lovely warned him about and Bruiser looked around to try and get on another subject quickly. "Should we maybe do something about them?" Bruiser asked as he looked over Lacy's shoulder to see Twist charging his horn. Lacy turned around in time to see the spell send Cheery rocketing upwards.

Turning back halfway, Lacy shrugged. "They'll be fine. Cheery loves Twister's...twisters."

Sure enough, a giggling Cheery came back down in circles, floating to the ground safely. She pecked Twist on the cheek, earning an impressive blush before she scampered back to Lacy and Bru. Twist followed behind more sedately, his blush still evident.

"Are we ready to go?" Cheery asked cheerily.

"Well, we still have to wait for...oh there they are. Come on, slowpokes!" Lacy called across the field.

***

"Come on, slowpokes." Lovely called, levitating a bag beside her.

Behind her, Second sighed, concentrating on the ten bags he was now floating above him. "Are we done yet?"

"If I may, sir. This was all your idea." Silver said.

Second exhaled slowly. "How was I supposed to know that Core's marketplace had suddenly attracted attention from the fashion scene? Last time I was here, this was all mining companies and supply stores. Now I'm getting dragged from one chic, unique, magnifique boutique to another. Not to mention how these bags seem to keep multiplying."

"And I could help you with that, sir." Silver offered.

Second shook his head. "It's your day off, Silv. And you don't have to call me 'sir.' I feel old enough as it is."

"If you're old what does that make me?" Silver asked.

"Respected." Second said proudly.

"Rather be young." Silver deadpanned. Turning to Lovely, Silver made his move. "Madam, if I might make a suggestion. There's a cute family-run bakery in Prominence that would be a perfect pick-me-up for the two of you. I'll take the bags home."

Lovely looked at him, concerned. "Are you sure, Silver? Seems like you should get to do something more with your day off."

"Oh, I fully intend to make the most of it." Silver said, reassuringly. "I have an invitation to a poker game in Helios. An old friend apparently is intent on losing a lot of money tonight. Although, spending the middle of my day with you two was a good time. The banter alone between you two was remarkable."

"I'm starting to realize where Life gets his casual bickering from." Second said, looking at Lovely intently.

She put a hoof to her chest. "Me? Surely not! Let's not bring up how a certain somepony treated their son during his formative years. No wonder he equates love with disdain!"

"Your words can wound, my loving prose-smith." He cooed, taking her hoof to plant a kiss.

She laughed and pulled him in closely. "My words are but a whetstone upon which the blade of your own guilt is sharpened, you old hut-builder."

Silver retrieved the eleven shopping bags effortlessly and nudged the pair towards the edge of the sidewalk. "Well. I can see you two will be a while. The bakery is called Sunridge. There's a taxi for you." Hailing the cab, Silver all but shoved the two inside and made his escape.

One taxi trip later, the Story's stepped out in front of Sunridge Sweets. Walking inside, Lovely pointed out a nice cozy booth sized for two in the corner. "I'll go stake out our seats. Surprise me with something sweet, my love."

As Second went to order, Lovely observed the few ponies assembled. They seemed content enough and in a neighborhood like Prominence, that was rare. The ponies who called the wealthiest district home were notoriously hard to please and their moods shifted with each new trend.

While Second made his way over, Lovely couldn't help but notice a gaggle of schoolfoals enter. Their loud voices quieted only moderately, but they seemed a decent sort. A unicorn colt scolded a pegasus who'd teased him while a pegasus colt and his unicorn and earth pony friend laughed about some joke told outside. In the rear a pretty pegasus filly waited for an earth pony who'd held the door for the group. Said final earth pony wore a strikingly familiar cowcolt hat.

Lovely glanced around, finally seeing her husband. Gesturing for Second to hurry up, Lovely nearly bounced in excitement. Catching her expression, Second tilted his head at her and picked up his pace. "What is it?"

"Sit, quickly!" He followed the order, his lips splitting into a half-grin from amusement and annoyance. "Bruiser just walked in. No! Don't look!" Her magic held his head in place before he could turn around.

Second frowned. "Lovely, what on Equestria..."

"Sh-sh-shhh!" Lovely warned, her gaze stuck to the group of foals. "He's here with friends. I think one of them might be the filly he has a crush on."

"That's good isn't it?" Second asked, confused. "Why can't I look?"

Lovely rolled her eyes. "Oh, can you imagine if he realized we were here? I'd be mortified to see my grandparents when I was out with my friends. Especially at his age."

"I thought we were cool grandparents!" Second protested.

"Well, I'm sure I am." She said with a grin. "It's you I'm worried about."

By chance, the bigger booths took up space in another corner of the restaurant. Cheery and Twist placed their order quickly and then made a beeline for a booth with enough space. Ginger and Dusty followed suit in no time and were at the table before Breezy could protest.

"Hey, littlefeathers, you're up. You gonna order or what?" The pink mare at the counter asked teasingly.

Breezy puffed up in irritation. "The name is Breezy, not littlefeathers."

"Well, since you asked so nicely, my name is Velvet Step. Pleasure to meet you." Velvet said pleasantly.

"Be nice, Breezy." Lacy warned.

Huffing, Breezy placed his bits on the counter. "I'll have a triple chocolate cupcake and a small vanilla shake."

Velvet rang him up with a smile. "You got it, Mr. Feathers, sir. Okay, lovebird and cowcolt, you're up. What'll it be?"

"Velvet Sugardimples Step! Don't you sass those young customers!" A mare's voice called from the back.

"Mo-om!" Velvet protested.

The little red foal on her back laughed and clapped his hooves together. "Mo-om!" He copied.

"Now why can't you do that so she can hear you?" Velvet said wonderingly.

"Ahem." Bruiser coughed to get the pink earth mare's attention.

Turning back to face the last two customers of the group, Velvet nodded. "Yeah, rustler, what can I get you and the pretty filly?"

Lacy spoke up instead. "I'll have a vanilla cupcake with chocolate crème frosting and a bottled water. What about you, Bru?"

Looking over the selection, Bru took a stab in the dark. "I guess I'll have a bottled water too. And, um, have you got red velvet?"

With a laugh, Velvet slid the foal on her back onto the counter, much to his delight. "Here's a Red Velvet!"

Bruiser turned to look at the foal in confusion. With a giggle, the little cream cheese-maned foal reached out and booped Bruiser on the nose.

"What a cutie!" Lacy said, clapping her hooves together.

"I think this one's too big to eat, ma'am." Bruiser said, poking the foal's nose in return.

"Suit yourself, guess you'll have to settle for one of the smaller cupcakes. Especially if you keep calling me ma'am." Velvet said with a huff, picking up Red and settling him back on her back.

Bruiser laughed. "Not too small, please, Miss Velvet."

She sniffed in mock disdain. "I suppose that'll do. Will this be together or separate?"

From their booth across the room, Lovely doubled down on her magic to keep Second in place. "Let me go. What if he doesn't have the bits?
Or the sense? He has to make a good impression!"

Lovely snorted. "Oh, and having his grandpa appear out of nowhere and pay for them is going to make a good impression. Honestly!"

Back at the counter, Bruiser beat Lacy to his bitpurse. "Together, Lady Velvet of the House of Sweets."

Velvet looked at Lacy with a wry grin. "Better hold on to this one, little filly."

Bru and Lacy blushed together. "Um, we're not..." Bruiser started, but didn't seem to know how to finish.

"He's just..." Lacy trailed off and they shared an awkward glance

Together they finished the sentence. "We're friends."

"Uh-huh. Yeah, okay. Just saying, keep this friend close." Velvet said, collecting the bits off of the counter.

Letting go of Second, Lovely smiled wide. "See! He can be taught!"

Cruising for a Bruising

As they sat around their table at Sunridge Sweets, enjoying their treats, Bruiser quietly observed his new friend's interactions. He really hadn't made many friends since moving to Canterlot. Granted, it was hard to get into a group when the cliques around school were friends since foaling. Noting his silence, Lacy smiled and nudged Bruiser.

"So, you've never been to Sunridge?" Lacy asked, surprised.

Bruiser swallowed his bite of cupcake and shrugged. "I've never really explored Prominence. My dad is a guard so sometimes I go to the castle, but we usually pass through the district without stopping."

"A night guard." Breezy Feathers said dismissively.

"Oh, wow, one of Princess Luna's guards?" Dusty Chestnut asked, oblivious to Breezy's glare.

"Eeyup." Bruiser said, trying to ignore the looks from Bree and Ginger. "Princess Luna's House Guard, Bravo Squad."

Breezy snorted, earning withering glances from Bruiser, Lacy, Twist, and even Dusty. "What?" Bree shrugged. "The B team of the lesser princess' personal guards and I'm supposed to be impressed?"

Dusty scooted away from his friend. "My mother is a city guard. Every guard looks up to the Royal Guards. The Royal House Guards are the elite of the elite. You all remember the giant cockatrice attack?" Sedately, the rest of the table nodded. "Well, mom says that Luna's guards led the most organized counter-attack of any guard unit. Your dad's commanding officer is almost a legend."

Finally Dusty turned to Breezy. "And if you've got anything else to say about it, Bree, I'm sure my mom would love to talk to your mom about it."

"Dusty, why you gotta be like that?" Breezy whined.

Dusty raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "Cause I don't like the way you're acting. You wanna be down on this colt because of the dumb stuff he pulled on your sister, fine. But don't ever talk bad about the Guard or the Princess' around me."

Breezy glared daggers at Dusty. Raising his eyebrows, Dusty held Bree's gaze unflinchingly. Finally, Breezy looked away and found his sister's line of sight instead. Lacy stared at her brother intently.

"He apologized, in case I didn't make that clear." Lacy said, lifting her saddlebag to retrieve the book he'd given her. "And you'll never believe who his grandmother is."

Lacy set Lovely's book proudly on the table. The looks of interest turned into shocked stares. Looking around the table, Bruiser couldn't help but smirk at the reactions garnered by a simple book.

Across the bakery, the silence at the youngster's table earned a worried glance from both Second and Lovely. Quickly, Lovely spotted the source of the group's interest and couldn't resist a smirk herself.

"Are they okay or..." Second started, turning back to Lovely with concern.

"It's okay dear. It seems I have some young fans." When that reassurance failed to banish his concern, she clarified. "Fans of the new series, dear, not my Barleyquin novels."

Back at the group's table, the other foals finally found their voices.

"Is that the new...?" Ginger asked, before getting cut off.

Dusty was shocked. "But that's not out yet!"

"There's no way he..." Twister started, in disbelief.

"How else did he get it then?" Lacy asked smugly.

"Lacy, it's even signed to you." Breezy said, looking at the inside cover with awe.

Overwhelmed by the response, Bruiser finally shrugged and spoke up. "Okay, I know my nana is a pretty talented writer, but...what's the big deal?" The words died in his throat as everypony's attention turned to Bruiser.

Lacy held the book close to her chest again. "There's another reason I hang out with two older class members and my dorky brother and his mismatched friends."

"Hey!" Breezy protested.

"Hey!" Ginger agreed.

"That's fair." Dusty nodded, smiling.

"Your grandmother's newest series is our favorite." Lacy finished. "All of us. We're like, the school's Lovely Story fan club."

"Really? I thought she mostly wrote romance." Bruiser said looking at the book again.

"She does." Twister agreed. "And she's not shy about putting her face out there. My aunt has more than her fair share of L.P. Rose's Barleyquin novels."

"And my mom." Lacy agreed, earning a groan from Breezy.

"And mine." Dusty said, smiling.

Ginger shrugged. "Mine has a few too."

"But Lovely Story's War of the Betrayed series is just so good!" Lucy said, hugging the book tightly.

"You're going to let me read it next, aren't you Lacy." Twister asked, pouting his lip.

"Obviously, as her brother, I'm next." Breezy said haughtily.

"And I'm right after Bree." Ginger put in.

"Puh-lease! As if she'd give the book to her bratty little brother instead of her best friend." Cheery protested.

Dusty shrugged. "We'll all get to read it eventually."

"Please don't fight over it." Bruiser pleaded.

"Agreed. There's no reason to fight, dearies." Lovely said, addressing the table. The assembled fillies and colts, even Bruiser, stared in awe. "I would be honored to have my little fanclub over to my house after school tomorrow. With your parent's permission, of course. I have plenty of copies for all of you. I'll even sign them for you personally. How does that sound?"

The silence that followed was hysterical to Second Story. Even Lovely was surprised by the power of her own celebrity. Bruiser looked around the table, even waved a hoof in front of Lacy's face. Turning back to his grandmother, Bruiser shrugged. "I think you broke my new friends, nana."

***

"Well, that's great!" Life exclaimed, setting a tray of freshly baked cookies down in front of the ponies assembled. Div and Second eyed the tray with suspicion. The smell wafting upwards had a tinge of burning and something...else.

"Um, honey?" Div started poking at a cookie carefully. "What are these?"

Life rolled his eyes. "Cookies. I'm trying a new recipe. Let it cool before you enjoy them."

"Right. Enjoy." Second said flatly. Lovely nudged him, but only earned a shrug.

"I don't know." Bruiser piped up, hesitantly. "I kinda wonder if they're just pretending to like me because of my grandmother."

Sighing, Lovely started passing around plates of cookies and glasses of milk. "If that's the case, Bruiser, then I'm sorry. I didn't realize just how popular this new series made me with my target audience. I mean, I hoped, but you never really know if any work catches on."

"You've got a point, Bruiser. If they're only in it because of Nana's books, then you'll find out pretty quickly. Try and engage them on other topics, see if you have common ground somewhere else. Give them a little to get over the shock of meeting a celebrity, though. Especially given your nana's excessive personality."

"Hey!" Lovely protested, sending a swarm of cookie crumbs after her cheeky son.

"Mom!" Life cried as he tried in vain to shield himself with a plate.

Ignoring their respective spouse's antics, Second and Div stared at the cookies in front of them. "Go ahead, Second." Div said, looking down at his cookie.

"He's your husband, Div. You should be the first." Second replied, lifting his milk instead.

Noting the looks of dread on both stallion's faces, Lovely finished her assault and sighed. "Oh you two. It's just a cookie." Lovely said, picking her own up. Not to be outdone by a mare, the two stallions picked up theirs and the three of them took a bite. Second, Div, and Lovely froze.

Chuckling to himself, Life picked bits of cookie out of his mane and faced his family. Three stony faces stared back at him.

"Hey guys, why the long faces?" Life joked.

"Dad, that's such an old pony joke." Bruiser teased, picking up his own cookie. Div stopped him, holding the hoof with the cookie down.

Swallowing carefully, Div grimaced. Inhaling, he tried to smile, but didn't quite make it genuine. "Honey, what's in these?"

"Cucumber, onion, and sesame seed. Three of my favorites. What do you think?"

"Uh," Div looked to Lovely and Second, who turned away to hide their disgust. Seeing no help there, Div got up and hugged Life. "I love you so much. Isn't Life nice to have gone to all this effort?"

Lovely and Second chewed in silence, nodding in spite of their pained expressions. Bruiser looked around at the adults curiously and downed his own cookie. Looking on in dismay, Div sighed and nudged the glass of milk closer to Bruiser. Giving him a sidelong look, Bruiser shrugged and drank his milk. His lack of reaction surprised those around him.

"Bruiser? What do you think?" Life asked. Div tensed, ready to comfort Life should Bruiser's lack of tact make an appearance.

"It’s good." The colt said, finishing his cookie with his second bite.

"Really?" Life asked, hopefully.

"Really?" Second, Lovely and Div asked incredulously.

To prove it, Bruiser grabbed another and downed it in one bite. "Yeah. Really."

Second, Div, and Lovely shared a look of amazement between them for a moment. Stunned silence fell over them.

"The poor colt has no sense of taste." Second concluded.

"If Life's been cooking like this the whole time, I can see why." Lovely put in.

"Hey!" Life pouted. "Div, you like it too, don't you? Have another one." He proffered the tray to his husband.

Div looked at Second and Lovely, but they pointedly looked at the tray as if it would attack them. Turning to Bruiser, he immediately realized the mistake, as the colt simply reached for another one. Returning to Life, Div made his decision. "I have another sweet in mind." He said, teasingly leaning in

Life stood, unfazed. "My parents are right there. And our child is watching. Take the cookie."

"I'd rather have my sweetie." He said, putting on all the charm he could. Lifting a hoof, he caressed the side of Life's face tenderly.

Pecking Div's cheek, Life held the tray up. "There, now prove to my parents that these aren't horrible."

"Uh, I have to get ready for the night shift at work. Love you!" Div said, pecking Life on the cheek before running off.

"Sogni DiVolare! You get back here!" Life said, chasing Div upstairs.

With both parents gone Bruiser stood, made his way to the trash can quickly and spat out what he'd held in his mouth. A pained expression crossed his face and he spat again. Not satisfied, Bruiser took off his hat and licked it a few times to banish the taste.

"Bruiser! Manners." Lovely scolded without thinking.

Second crossed to the fridge and retrieved a jug of juice. "You must love you dad an awful lot to spare his feelings like that." He said, approvingly. "But sometimes it's okay to tell your loved one that something just isn't good. Believe me, I know."

As Second and Lovely shared a look, Bruiser downed a good portion of juice.