The first thing I feel is… my head pounding like war drums. Or, I think it’s war drums…
Oh! Stomach just kicked in! Not the time, not the time, not the time! Both headache and stomachache at the same time are always the worst. What did I do last night…?
I remember…
…
Drink. Lots of drink. That’s what I was doing last night. Oh… so much for my body being a tem-
BUZZ BUZZ!
ARGH! WHAT IS THAT NOISE!
BUZZ BUZZ!
Phone! Where’s my phone?
My vision is all blurred from all the lights and my lack of glasses. Where’s the-?
Buzz buzz!
Oh, there it is. I stretch out and take it. Looks like a text message… from Cai? Oh boy.
Hey mate, what the hell
happened last night?
I decide to text back.
I dunno, but thx
for waking me up!
>:(
Then the phone pops up 5% battery remaining.
Argh. My phone is about to die. Better plug it in to recharge. Now where’s my charger, is that it?
…
No, that doesn’t look like a phone charger.
Hang on. I may not have the best vision right now, but I have a good memory and I don’t recall having a bedside table beside my bed. Am I—-
Oh god, I’m completely naked. And I’m in an unfamiliar room with a dying phone. Where is the nearest—-
There’s shuffling behind me, interrupting my train of thought. Um… maybe… I turn around.
And I see the soft, smooth grey back and charcoal hair of a pony mare in the same bed, also naked.
...wow. I guess I got lucky last night.
Ever since humans and ponies got together, I’ve kinda wondered what it would be like to be with a mare. And now… dang it, the experience is ruined. I finally got one and I can’t remember any of it.
Wait, is this her room? Please tell me this is her room. It would be super awkward to find we’ve broken into someone’s place just to have sex.
Only… I don’t know her. Who is this girl?
Wait, what was I doing again? Oh yeah, texting to Cai.
You bailed on us last
night! You went to get
drinks and never came
back. WTH?
All the girls were so
pissed off. I ditched my
date so you could just
bail on us all?
Huh. Guess drunk me was an ass last night. But what happened last night, really?
Okay, this should be easy to figure out. I was at a bar, I was with Cai and some girls, I went to get some more drinks annnd… I must have met her? Maybe? Better answer him.
Sorry. I don’t know what
happened actually last night,
but guess what? I got tail!
Wait. That was a bad phrasing. I shouldn’t have said that I got tail. That’s just rude to the mare I’m with. Still, that should shut him up. Ow ow ow, hangover. Not cool.
Bullshit! One drink and
you’re off bedding women?
You need a better excuse than
that for ditching your mates!
Shit, Cai doesn’t believe me. He sounds pretty mad. I turn back to the mare I’m with.
Maybe I should take a picture of her to prove I’m not... - No, better not. I’m not gonna stoop that low and take a picture of someone—- no, somepony, just to shut up my friend.
Annd, my phone just died. Great.
Well, I’m gonna need answers and this silence isn’t gonna help me get them. Better wake her up.
Fwoomph!
Or not.
The duvet covers my head and I hear hoofsteps running fast somewhere. Well, at least I don’t need to wake her up.
Okay, new duty. Get my clothes and figure out what happened last night. I don’t exactly remember what happened but I can piece things together quickly… when I don’t have a headache.
I throw the duvet off and look to my side of the bed. I see a pair of jeans my size and a condom wrapper on the floor. Thank god we were sensible enough to use protection. I take my jeans and put them on. I can find my underwear later.
Now then... My current thought is interrupted as I see her clothes all over a chair against the wall. Wow, those are some really expensive-looking clothes. I mostly go with Levi’s and McGordons but those… I don’t want to know the price tag.
A door opens and I see her step through. She’s not naked anymore, she’s wearing a white bathrobe. She sees me and stops. And I think… damn, she looks good.
Now I get a proper view of her. I don’t know pony faces properly but I can see that its features are up in the ‘attractive zone’. And that’s not all. She’s got the prettiest violet eyes I’ve seen. The robe is concealing her body but I’m guessing that she’s slim yet curvy at the same time. A rare combo these days. “Oh, hey,” she says.
“Hey,” I reply back. “You doing okay?”
“Yes, I just really had to run to the bathroom,” she says with an accent I wouldn’t mind hearing more of. “I’d… rather not go into it.”
“No no, I get it. Everyone gets sick.” Stupid! Don’t bring that up! “Uh… do you have a hangover?”
She nods. “Just a small one. I don’t normally drink that much on a night like that. And how do you feel? You don’t seem too good.”
I rub something in my eye. “Not so good. I feel a bit sick myself.”
She nods at me. “No surprise there. You had a few before we met.”
Huh? Cai said I only had the one. Did I get some liquid courage before walking up to her?
She tilts her head at me. “Can I get you anything?”
At that, I perk up a bit. “Some painkillers wouldn’t hurt. And water.”
She nods with a soft smile (OH MY GOD) and leaves quietly. I have time again to go look for clues as to what happened last night. And my clothes. I need to find those too.
But first off, I need to find my glasses, I’m virtually blind without them. Good thing I know what their shape is when in blur. Only… they’re not where they usually are. I see them by her clothes now, when I squint as hard as I can. Buried under her bra, even.
I carefully move the bra and pick up my glasses. I don’t bother with her cup size. I will admit I am curious, but I won’t look unless permitted. Now, I have my glasses and now I should find my other clothes.
My shirt is on her TV. I choose not to question it as I take it.
She comes back with a glass of water and a small painkiller, along with a cup of coffee for her, presumably. “Your water, Sir,” she says with a mocking tone of her accent, “and your killer of pains.”
I simply take the pill first and then sip the water. “Thank you, M’lady.” That got her to snort.
“Humor becomes you.” She sips her coffee as we decide to sit down to drink. “By the way, thank you.”
“Huh?”
“Last night…” she starts off and then sighs. Oh boy. Sighing is never a good sign from what I remember from dating simulation and advice from buddies. “I’m normally not the kind of girl to go see a complete stranger through a dating app…”
Aha. That must be how me met. I get it now. I was with Cai and some girls having a few drinks, I remember the time I was supposed to meet her, excused myself and went off to see her.
“...and then having the guy bail on me in the middle of our date…”
...I stand corrected.
“Quite the bastard, he was,” she finishes.
Okay… we can safely assume that I’m not ‘the guy’ she was supposed to meet. I see her tail swishing about behind her.
“I was ready to go fetch a taxi, head home and stay indoors for days.”
“Then I showed up,” I interrupt. She looks at me and then smiles.
“Yes. You bought me a drink and just… listened as I ranted about my problems. And it cheered me up. I really appreciate that. I guess my bad night turned around thanks to you.”
Okay. She got stood up, and I stepped in for her sake. Still wanna know what we talked about, though.
“Well, now I know why I accidentally ditched my friends back there,” I say. She recoils a bit.
“Oh! I’m sorry, I didn’t you weren’t there with friends. You didn’t even mention them,” she says to me.
Annnnd, now I feel like a complete dick. I ditched Cai for a very pretty mare I just met. May have been a good cause, but still.
“It’s okay. They’re a bit upset with me this morning, I bet.”
She frowns a bit but says nothing about it. “Hangover’s going away?”
I finish my water and nod. “It’s going. It’ll take a while for the painkiller to kick in, but it’s going.”
She hums in approval. “That’s good to hear.”
Okay, now everything makes sense. I was with Cai first, I had a drink, we talked to some girls, I decided to go get some more drinks for everyone, then I met this mare (It’s annoying I still don’t know her name. Or remember it), she looked depressed, I got her a drink, we talked and it seemed to have cheered her up. And then we must have gotten a taxi to her place and… well, nature.
I wonder if- “Listen,” she says suddenly. “About last night…”
“Yes?”
She fidgets with her cup and glances here and there, seeing the little mess we made last night. “I… I’m not really this kind of pony. I mean, meeting a complete stranger, having drinks with them and bringing them… here, home… it isn’t something I normally do.” She looks down to the floor. “I’ve never actually done this sort of thing before.”
I scratch my head and I feel like I should cheer her up. “Well, if it’s any consolation… I’ve never done this before, either.”
The noise from her indicates she’s smiling. “That makes me feel better. But… what I’m trying to say here is… I don’t want this to be… what’s the word?”
“Typical?” I suggest.
“Yes, ‘typical.’ I mean, you’re still here. I thought for a few minutes that you would leave while I was still asleep or whilst I was out of the room.”
“Along with some of your valuables?” I ask for clarification. It may be my first one night stand, but certainly not the first time I’d be accused of stealing something.
But she shakes her head. “No, not like that. You were nice to me last night and you’re still here. I mean no offense by that, of course.”
“None taken,” I say. “Sorry about the accusation, I’ve.. had bad experiences.”
“Oh.” She looks up at me. “That’s okay.”
Still, she seems happy I’m still here. All things considered, I guess I did a good first impression. Good thing I remembered that the first impression lasts the longest.
Reading that off a t-shirt was good, I guess. But reading that t-shirt off the girl with the biggest rack in our class in high school? That took some damage.
I decide to speak up again. “You know, I don’t think we got to really know each other that well last night. I wasn’t exactly in the best of states to know you properly,” I admit, getting her attention on this one. “So… all things considered, would you mind starting over?”
She looks at me with an expression that says: ‘What the hell are you talking about?’ Or, that’s the interpretation I’m getting, but I reach out my hand to her anyway. “Hi, I’m Andreas.”
This time her eyes widen and she looks between the hand and my face. Then she smiles and takes it. “Octavia.”
We talk things out and by the time it’s 8am, I decide to leave after having helped her clean up the room. I put on my clothes as best I can and she walks me to the door.
But… I stop before opening it. “Um… this is gonna sound nuts,” I start.
“Okay?” She drags out the question.
“I know we just met and all, and this got off to a rocky start… but would you mind… if I were to say that… I would like to see you again?” I ask her. “Not in a bar, of course, but someplace… relaxing.”
She blinks a few times at me before looking back to the bedroom. “Would you mind telling me your phone number?” I tell her, she memorizes it. “Okay, I’ll send you a text of my answer later. Okay?”
I nod and I leave her apartment. There’s a bus stop not far from the building so I head there and get as close as I can to my place and then walk the rest of the way. The whole trip took me about two hours with all the bus stops along the way.
I find a note from Cai, saying that he’ll want answers later, on my front door. Marvellous.
The first thing I do is connect my phone to my charger and let it reach full power. I spend most of the time cleaning up my own apartment and clear out some old bottles from when Cai was here. Least he could do is clean up his own mess.
I never hear a ping from my phone the whole time. Well, I did hear one when I connected the phone charger, but I wonder if Octavia forgot it, hasn’t sent yet or just don’t care about sending one.
No, no, don’t go there, brain. She seems very nice and was a nice lady, so she wouldn’t not care.
But out of the curiousity, I decide to take a look. There is a text message from an unknown number. Fact is, it was sent soon after I left her place. I open it up.
You know, I’ve never
been to a human zoo
before. You like animals?
Author's Note
I swear, I only wrote this because I was bored.