Regret

by SpiritOfDancingFlames

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Changelings
Length: 1397

A changeling goes to a bar, full of regret and just needing to drink it all away...

It was one little mistake. One tiny little mistake. And that was the end of the changeling's happiness.
Alone, he goes to a bar, needing to drink his sorrows out. The bartender listens to his story...

Published 2016-06-09 06:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-06-09 06:20:02 UTC

Regret

It was a frigid, rainy day, too cold to be walking outside. Especially for a Changeling like myself. I shivered, but I needed to be out here, I needed to go where I could get away from it all.

I trotted into the bar, head hanging low. I pulled up a stool, sitting in the corner. The bartender looked over at me, his eyes widening, but I didn’t meet his fearful gaze. “…Just... give me something heavy. Best you’ve got. Please…” Nodding somewhat shakily, he pulled out a bottle, pouring me a shot. “Thanks,” I murmured. I tipped it back, downing it. I grimaced as my throat felt like I’d swallowed a burning ball of pitch. Whiskey.

I sighed, thinking back to just an hour ago. I could hardly believe it, it was almost like it was just a bad dream, because I’d never thought in a million years that it could’ve happened.

I sat there, having shot after shot, for half an hour. The bartender began to warm up to me, eventually. Finally, he spoke.

“…Y-you alright? You look like you got… something on your mind.” The bartender’s hesitant voice made me look up.

I smiled sadly. “Yeah… I guess I do.”

“…Want to talk about it?”

I nodded solemnly. “Sure.” I sighed. “Could I have another shot, first, please?”

“One second.” Grabbing the bottle again, he poured me the shot and set it in front of me. I took this one a little slower, but it burned no less than the first. If anything, a little more.

“So… I’ve been here a while, in a disguise.” I quickly changed into a grey unicorn with a brown mane, then back to my normal form. “I’ve been hanging around since a little after the Canterlot Invasion. I promise you,” I assured him, “that I’ve not hurt anypony. I’ve been living with this mare, Beach Sunset. We… we’ve been dating, for about a year and a few months now.”

I shifted, trying to get more comfortable. “I’ve always been careful not to fall asleep at her house. When we sleep, our disguises shut off. I was extremely careful the first few months, but, as time went on, and we grew closer, I got a little more lax. I thought that since we’d gotten so close, she wouldn’t…” I sniffled.

Wordlessly, the bartender passed me another shot. I took it with a grateful nod, holding back tears as I downed it.

“…As I was saying… I thought that we were close enough that if she happened to find out, she’d me okay with it. I really did love her,” I said, looking up at him for a moment. “I really did…” I sighed. “Anyway. A few months ago, I got a little more careless. I let myself fall asleep there, a few times. I never knew if she’d noticed or not, but I always changed back into my disguise as soon as I’d woken up.”

The bartender looked at me curiously. “Where did you sleep most of the time, if not at her house?”

I grinned wryly. “Cardboard box in an alley along 5th street. I spent my days with her, feeding off her love as gently as possible, without her noticing. I only took little bits. I used what little I’d gathered each day to keep myself warm. It wasn’t the greatest, but, it was better than nothing.”

“Couldn’t you have just gone back with the rest of your… clan?” he asked hesitantly.

I stared quietly at the wood in front of me, holding back tears, for a minute. When I spoke up, my voice cracked. “I’m one of the last six Changelings still alive. There is no swarm for me to go back to…”

He looked at me in shock. “What do you mean? What happened?”

I looked at him curiously. “Did you not see the forced expulsion of us all during the wedding? Giant pink barrier pushing us out?”

“Well, yeah, but…” he scratched the back of his head with a hoof. “That didn’t actually… kill them all, did it?”

I plunked my front leg on the bar, tapping it with my other one. “See this? This is our exoskeleton, our chitin. It’s what protects us.” I put my legs back on my stool. “It’s very solid, resistant to a lot of damage… except blunt damage.”

I shook my head. “The barrier didn’t hurt us at all. But, it didn’t care what happened after. Almost every changeling that wasn’t flying above the rooftops was instantly crushed to a pulp against a building. And the ones that were flying were forced out so quickly, their… our wings tore off.” I looked at my back, at the scars that previously were where my wings attached to my body.

“…Sweet Celestia, I… I had no idea,” the bartender said.

I looked up at the bartender with an empty feeling inside. “Do you know what happens when a changeling falls out of the sky, from thousands of feet, at a high rate of speed?”

He shook his head cautiously.

“Try it with a watermelon sometime. It's pretty much the same effect.”

He blanched, shaking. Slowly, he poured me a shot, passing it to me, then poured himself one, downing it quickly. I chuckled sadly. “Yeah, that was me, too. Did you not notice the three-hour time skip directly following the pink barrier? That was when Celestia and the Royal Guard were cleaning up what was left of the corpses. They never found our Queen, the idiot... I hope she’s dead somewhere.” I shook my head. “Sorry, I’m getting off topic.”

I drank my shot, sighing. “So, with her during the day, cardboard box at night. Right. So, last night, well, we were being a bit more…” I cleared my throat. “A bit more active than usual. Which, understandably, left us exhausted. I… kinda fell asleep beside her. When…” I sniffled, tear springing to my eyes. “When I woke up, it was morning. I panicked, and tried to get up without her noticing, but just before I got off the bed, she rolled over. She smiled until she opened her eyes. She screamed… She yelled at me to get out. I tried to explain, I changed into my disguise, but… She just freaked out even more…” My head began to pound from all the alcohol.

“That’s… that’s horrible,” the bartender said.

I nodded. “Yeah. It was. I… Like I said before, I really loved her. And, having been through all that time with her, having so much love for each other, all gone in an instant… only to be replaced by screams to get out.” I spread my front legs helplessly. “I wasn’t even a big part of the invasion. I didn’t hurt anypony, all I did was distractions. But, I’m a changeling, and that immediately makes me invading scum, I guess…”

I sighed. “Sorry to make you listen to all this.” I grabbed my bag of bits, leaving it on the counter. “I think that should be enough. It’s all I have.” I stepped off the stool, my legs shaking as the alcohol began to hit home. “Thanks for the drinks… and for the company.”

The bartender looked at me worriedly. “You gonna be alright?”

I smiled, masking my inner sorrow. “Yes, I will. You’ve helped me a lot.” I turned, shakily walking out.

The night was cold. Really cold. I was out of love, and out of options. Despite all that, I smiled. “Heh. You helped more than you think…” I smiled as my vision blurred. My legs began to give out, so I got down, crawling for the nearest alley. It took a while, but I finally did it, scooting over to prop myself against the wall. “One more for them to clean up, I guess…” I leaned my head against it. “Good thing he didn’t know bugs die faster from alcohol than ponies…” I closed my eyes, feeling a burning sensation that was somehow soothing at the same time.

My heartbeat was getting faster, faster…

I wondered how long it would take for it to sto-

Author's Note

A thing happened to me today, some of my past came to bite me in the rear. The resulting feelings spawned this.
I have an alternate ending I'll be writing, I'll probably post it tomorrow.