Chapter 2

To get to the ravine that Twilight was talking about you had to head west through Ponyville's small yet boisterous art district. Ponies would gather around to watch others paint, sculpt, and from time to time you might catch some ponies watching a poet writing a piece under the shade of the trees that the buildings weave through seamlessly. Many weird stares were given but none were more obvious than an extravagant tailor that was showing off some of her newest works. Pony dresses were strange in anatomy and design compared to the ones that John would see back home. Rarity looked at him with a shocked gaze and seemed to almost faint as John simply looked in awe at her dresses while he walked through the last bit of the arts district.

Outside of that place, one would see a large grassy field which to the north would end in a forest, but to the far west, most would simply more grass. John on the other hand, with his special eyes, could see a tiny cyan dot on the horizon that seemed to be floating right before a drop-off. The grass was soft on John's bare feet and the dirt was cool and refreshing. The wind brought in the same smells of bread and flowers but with a gut-wrenching twist. The wind carried the faint odor of sulfur.

"Someone throwing goose eggs?" John thought to himself, recoiling at the scent. Heightened senses, despite claims to the contrary, are not always a boon!

Minutes past and as John got closer and closer the smell became more and more wretched! However, the smell was contrasted by a sight more beautiful than John could ever imagine. A cyan wonder that stood stout in the grasses near the ridge. A rainbow flowed from the tip all the way down to the base. Yes, that was a gorgeous tree that many are not lucky enough to see in their wildest hallucinations. Then, then there was Rainbow Dash standing, looking down into the ravine.

"Hey." John said nonchalantly as he sat down with his legs drooping over the chasm.

Rainbow Dash turned around quickly, clearly upset by something going on in the ravine, and spouted out, "Who in Tartarus are you! What are you at that?"

"You know, I could ask you the same damn question and it would get us the exact same god damn place. I'm John, I got played slightly by a Djinni but still got a pretty good fuckin' deal. There's your TL;DR now what the hell is going on down there? It smells awful!"

Rainbow Dash looked at him, astonished at the absolute crassness of this man without even the slightest clue of the irony that that implies. "Well," she started putting her hoof up, "It started with that sulfur smell coming from down there. I went to investigate since that's kinda my job being the fastest pegasus around..."

John cut her off, "Don't need your life story get to the point."

She looked at him once again in disbelief of what was in front her. Rainbow Dash was correct in saying that she was the fasted pegasus in Ponyville, but she had never been told off before when talking like that, especially by someone new. "Well, wait a minute! How do can I even be sure that you can be of help to me?" She asked, getting into John's face.

"Look enough with the cliche bullshit of you not thinking I'm up for the job. Tell me what is going on. I will resolve it. Hell, how Twilight has put it you go through this kind of stuff on a weekly basis."

"Yeah, but seems worse. These things started appearing! I read a book that I borrowed for Twilight that their imps. Lesser devils that come from Tartarus. They usually just accompany evil unicorns or go around trying to get people to do evil but a bunch of them seem to be congregating here for some reason."

"That sounds like something that should be easily fixed. I'll go down there and see what I can do."

"Wait! Don't you think you need help?" Rainbow Dash said as John stood up and stretched.

"Nope!" John exclaimed as he stretched his arms, legs, and back. "If the Djinn was correct, I should be able to jump off this ledge, land on my feet and be perfectly fine."

"Are you drunk?" Rainbow Dash asked wildly as she flew in front of the backing up John. "You don't have wings, best case scenario your knee bones become visible, worst case scenario you become an abstract art installation!"

"I'm not drunk! I'm what you would call awesome." John's arrogance was showing, interesting seeing as the most impressive thing he did today was not trip over a rock that was only slightly hidden by leaves.

"Don't say I didn't warn you." Rainbow Dash stepped aside figuring it would be easier to just watch him fail miserably.

John smirked and took a few paces back away from the ravine before running forward and leaping into the air. His heart was soaring! This had been the most intense thing he had ever done. Leaping into a ravine to combat evil after gaining immense power. He would soon be superman, he would be a god amongst men, and as he started going faster and faster he realized he would soon hit the ground. Adrenaline was pumping he was ready to bash some devil skulls in, and then it happened. He struck the ground with an astounding boom, but something else had happened. As John looked down at his legs he saw that his knee bones were sticking through his thighs.

"Fuck." He spoke those words in a deadpan voice before screaming to the heavens, alerting every imp in the area that was previously either eating, sleeping, or mating with various wildlife. The imps began to snicker as they came across their helpless prey, but even they were stopped in their tracks as they saw John's bones slowly crack and grind and retract back into his body to be repaired. John felt every movement, every touch, and even the healing process. It hurt, it hurt badly. The Djinn said that he would have an insane healing factor, never that it wouldn't hurt, or that he would be harder to break than an average human.

"Guess the blue one was right about the knee thing." John stood up and looked around his immediate surroundings. There were at least twenty-seven imps visible to him. Each one drooling for a chance at the strange creature before them. "You want me, come and get me!" John growled and struck a fighting stance. It was at this moment he realized he made a mistake. In his attempt to speed along to become a hero, he forgot to learn how to fight or procure a weapon.

The imps spoke in gurgling babbles. It sounded as if it were some guttural language, but John sure as hell didn't understand it. An Imp charged him, and as quickly as it flew John was able to stop it with a firm backhanded slap. The imp flew across the ravine, cracking its head open on a particularly jagged rock. The imp kept twitching and bled out a foul-smelling liquid that appeared to be acidic. The remaining imps looked up at John and began to fly around him and insane speeds; one by one they charged the man, and one by one he smacked them to the ground with great intensity.

"By my mighty hand, I will slap thee back to where you came from!" John screamed in an almost humorous matter.

With only about ten of the imps left, they finally figured it may be worth their time to charge him all at once. John managed to slap two of them away before the other eight latched to him. They ripped at his flesh with their razor sharp teeth and claws. They melted some of his flesh away with their acid. John felt every little bit of it. John kept healing the damages, but he couldn't help but fall to his knees and wince in agony. Rainbow Dash saw the man fall, and quickly jumped into action! Her first move being a hit and run, dropping a large rock onto the head of an imp attempted to claw out John's ever healing throat. The imp died, but the rock also smashed into John's head giving the poor man a massive headache on top of the grievous bodily harm. The imps, seeing John just keeps healing flew off of him and quickly started darting towards Rainbow Dash. John's body took only a moment to heal, but by the time it did the imps had already flown off into the sky and were nearing Rainbow Dash at an alarming speed.

"The little shits are coming for you!" John screamed as he stood up and tried to find some rocks he could throw to help her out as much as she had helped him. It was late though, by the time John had stood up to scream, she was preparing to take another run, but she was simply running into the swarm of remaining imps. They latched on quickly and began to tear at her flank. They screamed and cackled in a way neither John nor Rainbow Dash would ever forget. John grabbed a pebble and quickly through it, aiming for an imp trying to tear at her wings. To his surprise, his aim was true even at such a long range and the pebble drilled a hole straight through the imp's skull causing it to crash to the ground with a resounding thud. John grabbed more pebbles, and with his newfound confidence in the art of chucking shit, he pegged all the imps in quick succession until one was left on Rainbow Dash. The damage on her was bad though and she was quickly descending with small holes pierced into her wings and bad damage to the rest of her body. The final imp was crawling towards her head with an attempt to kill and run so he could have a meal later. John wouldn't let that happen. With no more stones suitable for accurate throwing left he broke off the head of one of the imps at his feet to use as a projectile. The strike was true, but the projectile was too large to be lethal to the offensive imp. John saw the creature free falling and began to run towards it was great vigor. He reared back his arm and screamed nonsensically as the punch connected created a massive burst of force alongside the actual punch. The imp was sent flying towards a boulder that it swiftly splattered against.

John took a deep breath and approached the boulder and looked it up and down. "I never did like abstract art." He smirked as he looked at the destroyed remains. He turned around and began to chuckle before a grim realization took him over. "Is she dead?" He thought to himself as he slowly turned around to the wounded Rainbow Dash. There were large chunks of flesh and fur missing, as well as the holes in her wings. Acid burns also littered her body with blunt force trauma to the front right leg and skull. Collateral damage from the pebbles most likely.

"Hey...blue...Rainbow Dash, that's your name...you alive buddy?" He grabbed a stick and gently poked one of her miraculously non-wounded areas. She groaned as he did so. "Oh thank the gods above. Alright Dash, let's get you out of here." He grabbed her and picked her up over his shoulder to be brought back to the small town of Ponyville.

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As John carried the wounded, and still unconscious Rainbow Dash into town there were many eyes on him. Some spiteful, some curious, most concerned for the well being of their beloved element of harmony. Something of this magnitude has never happened before. Fights have left the elements and other 'warriors' of Equestria exhausted but never battered to this degree. John went straight to Twilight's library and opened the door.

"So I have good news and bad news." He put Rainbow Dash down on the hardwood. He was covered in her blood, and she was looking far more pale than before they left the ravine.

Twilight rushed past John and used her magic to wrap up Rainbow Dash in all the bandages she had at her disposal. Twilight worked quickly and with great precious as she put Rainbow Dash into a good position as much as limited medical knowledge allowed.

"What happened!" Twilight said very sternly.

"There were imps, I jumped down, killed a bunch, they got on top of me, Rainbow Dash got em off but then they got on her. I heal she doesn't, so...yeah. On the bright side, the imps are dead. Bittersweet right?"

"Far more bitter than sweet, but yes. At least the problem is gone. Rainbow Dash needs to be cared for, I'll send for you if I need you, for now just don't get anyone else injured."

John nodded and took himself out of the building. This was going to be a long life.