Author's Note

This chapter is done. Next will be started soon. I just have a few other things to get done. I have a ton of Let's plays of mods for Left4Dead2 to get through. If anyone wants to join in some Zombie slaying, leave a comment on this or any of my other stories.

Exonerated

There was one thing constantly ringing in the back of her mind. Why did they forgive me? It screamed for an answer, to be revealed to her in some way shape or form. But would the answer she got be believable, or would it be part of something meant to mask her emotions, to reveal an even deeper resolution that was knawing at her conscience. After everything she had done, did she really deserve it though? Part of her sanity wanted to bury all of this and move on with her friends, but at the same time, the other half wanted to confront and drag out into the light of day to wither and die. If her friends could find it in their hearts to forgive her, could she at least forgive herself?

After all, she hadnt been in control of her own actions at the time, but that didn't absolve her of feeling guilty over it. She still felt like she deserved some kind of punishment for what she had done to all those ponies, including her Canterlot friends. They were still her friends after all. She still couldn't get the look on Colgate's face out of her mind. That look of horror haunted Twilight everywhere she went now. She could see it in the eyes of the few that had been rescued by Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.

And it sent a chill down her spine every single time she caught them staring at her.

The only real question to ask , is could she forgive herself for what she had done?

Even after all she had done, they still forgave her. Even if part of her could not forgive herself. Especially in regards to what she put AJ through. Twilight couldnt even look at the farm pony when they brought her to visit her in the hospital. Applejack looked right into her eyes and hugged her. Hugged her. How could she just let it go? Twilight had forced her own brother to violate her peace of mind and her body before disposing of him. And Applejack had decided to let bygones be bygones and hug her. Twilight didn't return the gesture, she just stood there next to the hospital bed trying to take it all in. And she was having a hard time doing so. And Applejack could tell by the look on Twilight's face.

She let go and turned away from her. Twilight decided that was the best time to leave. Rainbow Dash stayed behind to check on AJ. She too had seen the mixed reaction in Twilight's eyes when AJ hugged and forgave her for her actions. All she could do on the inside was sigh. Twilight had been misused by a powerful force, and she still blamed herself for the reactions that came about because of it. Rainbow turned back to the hospital bed and looked AJ in the eyes. It was one of those,'I'm bucking serious', kind of looks that she had always gotten when something was looking to be difficult.

This is gonna be tough, Rainbow thought to herself.

"How do I break this to you,", She started off.

"She still feels guilty about what she did," She told Applejack as they both watched Twilight leave the hallway. She too could tell it was hard for Twilight after she had just hugged her out of the blue.

Why? Twilight thought, Why did she forgive me like that. I did horrible things to them when I was under his control, not only did I disrupt the harmony of ponies that I had fought for against monsters like Sombra and Nightmare Moon, I also ended up being far worse then any of them. Twilight couldn't think right now while she was still in their presence, she had to get away from here. Celestia had told her she had been admonished of her crimes, exonerated in legal terms. But it was all still there in her mind.

The Experiments, the things she had done to her Canterlot friends Lyra and Colgate, of what she had done to Applejack. Part of her now understood how Luna must of felt during her exile on the moon, and the guilt that came with it when was reformed by the Elements of Harmony. Another part of her mind wanted to bury it all and move on, but the part that wanted to bare it all, decided it was best to do so in the company of Celestia and Luna. It would be a long and difficult road, but Twilight decided it was best to it all said and done. She didn't want to be haunted by her actions for the rest of her life. She knew that no matter what she'd still get looks from the other residents of Ponyville, and it was only a matter of time before some of them took matters into their own hooves.

As of this moment there were a thousand thoughts coursing through her mind, and all of them just as important as the next, but still all jumbled in her mind. It wasn't something that was abnormal for her, given the fact she was overly anxious now more then she usually was, given some of the circumstances she'd been in before. After her encounter with Amon, after everything started to fall apart in her life. All she could do was constantly wonder why. Why was AJ so forgiving of her actions? The answer seemed just on the tip of her tongue, but still just out of reach.

It didnt seem to make any sense to her, after the news of what happened in Canterlot reached Ponyville, everypony in town town seemed indifferent towards her, but there were still some that showed they were still fearful of her. Even when they had no reason to be. She had after all been exonerated of her actions, even though she knew the guilt wouldn't subside as fast as a few hoped it would. She just wanted to get home and go to bed. She had expected to find caution tape everywhere, but she was sorely surprised when she got there.
It would only take a matter of months for her prediction to come true. And from there it would become a whole other tale. The unicorn she was would be gone physically, but their nightmare would begin. When got there she saw that the caution tape around the Library was torn down. And the door was open. Twilight cautiously stepped inside to find Rainbow Dash standing in the middle of the room. Apparently she had flown here as Twilight was leaving the hospital. She expected a slap in her face, what she got was a hug from a tear stained pegasus. Twilight finally let it out and cried into Dash's shoulder, maybe for what might be the last time if her fears came true.

Now it was only a matter of time before she could truly forgive herself for her actions. As she stood there, Dash still holding on to her, she finally understood what it must of been like for Luna for all those years during and after her banishment. How much guilt was the princess of the night really dealing with then and now? It was a question she was going to get an answer to at some point down the road. Right now, she closed her eyes and embraced Rainbow back.

She had a friend to console right now.