The Conventional Conquest of Earth

by Tyrannosaurus_Tux

1 - The Eve of the War

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The light of Celestia’s sun bore down on all who lived in the land of Equestria.

The foals of Ponyville Elementary School enjoyed the outdoors at recess. Their squeaks, squeals, and playful laughter echoed off the hills, and all those who witnessed it merely smiled at the innocence and the pure joy these little youth had. Today, that witness was Cherilee, head teacher of that small school.

She watched as the foals scampered, chased and shouted at each other. Their days were simple. Homework and play. No conception of anything more. No extra stresses were present in their lives, as it were for Cheerilee, what with death and taxes.

No foal went hungry under the watchful eyes of their parents, and no foal went without a comfortable bed in a sturdy house in this idyllic side of paradise. Indeed, nopony went without food or shelter, or someone to care about them. Such a thing would be improper, thus it wasn’t so.

Cheerilee looked to the distant Everfree forest, and noted how peaceful it was. Those woods were almost a mirror of the Whitetail Woods and all the other woods roundabout. There was something, however, about the good ol’ Everfree that set it apart.

Perhaps it was the memories she had as a young foal. She could still recall fondly the memories she had made with her good friend, Rarity. Perhaps it was the distant ghost of the smell of s’mores, and cooked meals near and over a fireplace. Such a day would long be remembered fondly for Cheerilee.

Of course, there was also the War.

Ruffling her feathers, Cheerilee frowned slightly. Those bad experiences cropped up again, and threatened to drown her in misery and despair. The conflict of yesteryears couldn’t really be considered a war, since it was just a band of Griffon Separatists trying to establish themselves in the otherwise idyllic Everfree, and attacked everyone who enters or nears their newly claimed turf.

That would not do. That would not do at all.


‘Raising her body, Cheerilee fiercely managed to avoid the attack intended to cleave her forehooves off her legs, and the attacker then overcorrected, landing himself on the ground, and that gave Cheerilee the opportunity. As an Earth Pony, Cheerilee had the upper body strength few species rarely possessed.

So, it was with a scowl on her face and a fire in her heart did Cheerilee lower herself, and smash her armored gauntlets on the hapless winged omnivore. Bones crunched under the weight and strength of the Imperial Centurion. The sound the poor bird issued from his beak was pathetic.


Blinking the unpleasant memory from her head, and, noticing the time, Cheerilee focused some energy into her horn, and let off a low-strength magical signal. Recess had ended, and class was about to start again.

Reluctantly, the fillies and colts of Cheerilee’s school made their way back to the small schoolhouse, and many did wonder with some renewed excitement and a bit of curiosity what new tale of adventure the retired officer of the Solar Corps had to offer them. She had yet to tell them of her ascension into Alicornhood, but that was a story for another day. Perhaps later, after she covered the Zebra Rebellion, algebra, Spike the Dragon Lord, and the 3 Year War.

Perhaps, later today, Cheerilee decided, that she would wash off her memories in the Ponyville Spa, as the twins there would surely help to calm down Cheerilee’s demons, and help keep her sane for another day.

She could even lounge in the hot tub, Cheerilee thought. That would cause her worries to be all washed away. Being a former Centurion of the Solar Army certainly had its benefits.


Swimming in a sea of strange sensations, Marcus waited for... something. A haze covered his every sense, as if some drug or some being was suppressing them. He was in a chair, that was for certain. His sight and breathing stifled by a simple cotton bag. Suddenly, the bag was then yanked from his head, and a bright light shone in his face.

Marcus grimaced. He had obviously been captured for his involvement in the illegal activities of the Cthulhu Cult. The animal sacrifices and the frauds had to have been noticed eventually. Now, he was reaping what he sowed after that ritual went pear-shaped and he lost consciousness. Except... something was off about the whole experience. The teen was stripped naked, and tied to a simple wooden chair. The rough ropes used to bind him chafed his skin almost as much as the coarse grain of the simple wooden chair. Marcus got the feeling there would be no due process this time....

That, as well as the giant cartoon golden-clad white pegasus unicorn horse... thing staring him in the face with an expression of utter contempt.The regalia of the creature was constructed with a craftsmanship Marcus had never seen before, as the intricate patterns of the golden plates both belied and reinforced the impression of the sturdiness and protective qualities of the armor at the same time. The bright light was dimmed, but it seemed that the creature’s war dressings could blind him in its own right. Little ponies in battle dress were woven into the gleaming material, all revering a red-golden sun.

And her eyes... the pony’s eyes shone with a brilliant magenta light, but the light also held a quality in such quantities that both awed and terrified Marcus. Something that overpowered his will and every other sensation. Something that built and destroyed nations. Something that put bridges up as well as knocked them down. The eyes of the captor held something that stunned Marcus into agape silence.

Power.

Power radiated off this alien being like the sun with its rays. Marcus knew not how, but he could sense the sheer ethereal energies emanating off her person... it was overbearing. It was just as eerie as seeing a golden laurel wreath on her head, framing her aurora-colored mane perfectly. As he watched, the lights within twinkled and it blew from an invisible wind. This only added to the unreal nature of bearing witness to such a creature, and the effect was only added when she addressed him.

Speak.

It was not a request. It was a command. Struggling to find words to speak, Marcus burst out, “W-Who’re... who are... you?”

The glare from the pony intensified, causing Marcus to wilt under her gaze, and growing more self-conscious about his nakedness. Thankfully, the silent treatment did not last long, as the pony addressed him again.

“I am Empress Celestia of the Solar Empire. You may not have heard of me, but I have not heard of such a thing as you.”

Leaning forward and down, Celestia leveled her head with Marcus’, and bared her flat teeth. Marcus did not feel any safer now than if the teeth were sharpened. His apparent defiance of this Empress was something both incomprehensible and soul-rending for him. Celestia asked, “Why have I not seen one your kind here before? My knowledge of the world is expansive and far-reaching. If I have not seen it, I have at least heard of it from my Centurions or Scholars. So when my little ponies found you in a field one day...”

Celestia reared her head back up, and resumed her condescending gaze on Marcus. She briefly broke eye contact to say, “We still do not know who you are or where you came from. Thus the only conclusion I can then draw, all things considered...”

The look in Celestia’s face turned hateful, and she lowered her face until her snout was just a hair’s width away from Marcus’ nose. The uncomfortably hot breath hit Marcus in the face, and he shied away as much as his restraints would permit.

“You are but the first of many. Be it a gang of roving barbarians... or an invading force. You will divulge the secrets of your tribe... so that the Empire can survive what is to come.”

Celestia’s horn shimmered with a magical glow, and Marcus suddenly felt ghostly tendrils pry into his skull. The sensation brought no small amount of panic, but another unseen force kept him still. Eyes widening, he felt his mind open like a book, and he experienced the most unreal sensation of his thoughts being scrutinized before blacking out.


“Satisfied?” inquired a slightly smug Twilight Sparkle as Celestia emerged from the dungeon chamber. The hallway was dank with the smell of mildew and with the despair of the enemies of the Empire. The place was dark and oppressive, an effect made deliberate by the Solar Engineers.

Celestia regarded her former student and asserted, “Some things have to be seen to be believed.”

Nodding her head, Legate Twilight Sparkle acknowledged the incredible nature of the world that Marcus had come from. An entire world dominated by his kind; humans. They rose above the food chain and above the need for their hunter-gatherer ways. An entire world of cultures and peoples formed thereafter. What was most unsettling about these humans, however... was their mastery of machines and war.

From what little could be seen from the prisoner’s mind, the fighting prowess and methods used by the humans posed a challenge and a serious risk to the Imperium Solaria. Celestia could not have even imagined being able to destroy entire armies from afar using artillery that did not derive from magic. It was almost inconceivable that an entire city could be destroyed with a single weapon without even the most basic fundamental understanding of the arcane. Humans had no way of interacting with the ambient magic, but Celestia was at least grateful for that. She didn’t need to know what these new threats could do with these powers.

Celestia needed to learn more. She needed to find their strengths and weaknesses. With a golden-clad lavender alicorn in tow, the Empress ascended from the dungeons. Outside waited Lord Draco Knight Spike. Celestia couldn’t help but feel a bit of pride every time she saw him. The purple-green dragon was impressive enough without the golden armor that covered his massive form. Ever since Spike managed to wrest control of the Dragon Specter, the tribes followed the new Dragon Lord’s command.

Spike, in turn, followed the Empress’ command. It was a funny thing. He had willingly given up the sovereignty of his own race over to Celestia out of loyalty to his surrogate mother, Twilight Sparkle. The Dragon’s Code that the young Imperial Legate had codified was adopted by all living drakes on Spike’s command. Granted, a few outcasts are still at large, who argue that Spike had put a ball and chain on dragonkind that would never be removed. It was with a delicious twist that Spike, in turn, had argued that he had freed dragonkind from barbarism. There was something he said that Celestia always adored... a phrase, quickly adopted by many of the Empire’s denizens.

‘To serve the Empress is to be free.’

A slight smile lifted Celestia’s normally demure features. Yes, there was much wisdom to be found in those words. Twilight did well to teach her baby dragon good standards. All creatures would do good to follow Spike’s example. Perhaps many will follow in his footsteps in the trial to come.

Wordlessly, the three leaders walked down the hallways of the Imperial Palace. As Celestia looked upon the stained-glass windows that lined the way, each window depicting a different victory she or her ponies have achieved in and over this world. As Celestia continued down memory lane, she could not help but internally remark about how far she had come. Naturally, this led Empress Celestia right back to the beginning, where she had first resorted to violence.


It was a thousand years ago, before Celestia was an Empress, and still young in the eyes of the world, despite her ascension to being an alicorn. She stared down the still, stone grey form of Discord. He had just been petrified by the most curious little artifacts known as the Elements of Harmony. They had disabled his ability to interact with magic, thereby trapping him inside his newfound prison, unable to harm another innocent.

Discord was harmless now, but resentment still resided in Celestia’s heart. After all, this was the being who mocked her and her sister for an extended length of time, altering reality to play overblown pranks on them. Some of these little jokes of Discord even put herself as well as other ponies at risk. Even petrified in stone, Discord looked mischievous and potentially dangerous.

Few prisons were perfect, after all. Stone would erode with time, and as Celestia observed the wards and various arcane effects in place, it was clear to her that this could not be a permanent solution. As she contemplated this world’s future, as one of dreading the day Discord would return. They would all live under the shadow of an old, vengeful villain again. Such a prospect lit a fire in Celestia’s gut, and such a sensation steeled her heart, and such a resolve chilled her eyes.

Celestia made a choice that day. It was a simple task to charge up energies in her horn, clearly with the express purpose to destroy. Luna, a dark-blue alicorn and Celestia’s younger, smaller sister called out in alarm, imploring Celestia to spare the draconequus, asking that the unholy union of random creatures not be killed after he has been defeated.

It was too late for words, however. With a mental command, the magic was sent loose in a straight lance of light. The beam struck the statue in the face, causing the impromptu masonry to shatter on contact. Unsatisfied with the immediate result, Celestia sustained the offensive spell, but oriented it downwards. Slowly, the once standing form of Discord in stone was transformed into a still pile of gravel, never again to rise, and Celestia felt liberated from the experience. Powerful. She dictated the fate of the villain, and it was so. Having the ability to render judgement was... cathartic. She was no longer the victim; now she was the master.


From then on, Celestia was changed. She was no longer a champion and proponent of harmony and friendship. That was how she and Luna were able to utilize the Elements of Harmony, after all. After having destroyed Discord, the Elements became little more than useless stones. That, to Celestia, was just fine. She had a new means of dealing with threats posed to her little ponies that worked just fine. Celestia recalled how much better the ponies were off under her wise rule. There was much that had to be done, but Celestia had it done gladly. She looked at the stones of the dungeon, and Celestia recalled the day they were laid, hundreds of years ago.

That was a time when Celestia and Luna were each hailed as heroes, and not one voiced opposition when Celestia made her bid for the mastery of both the sun and the budding nation of Equestria. Bandits and brigands were brought before the Sisters, and they were judged and hanged for their crimes. ‘Such an efficient system,’ Celestia had remarked, and it was so. She recalled with particular enjoyment how she was permitted to pull apart particular troublesome individuals, such as rapists, mass murderers, and the various leaders of whatever rebellion had fallen out of line and had dared to defy the rightful ruler of the world, and had tried to upend the rightful system.

Celestia recalled that she had demanded that the world belonged to the Empress of the Sun, and it was so. Every nation, tongue, and people should belong to her, and all territory, land, and seas should belong to her, and her alone. That last thought brought a tear to Celestia’s eyes. Yes, Luna had rebelled, and she had been dealt with accordingly. Well, almost. The Empress’s heart was moved to spare her sister, not only because she was her sister, but because Luna and her followers hadn’t actually killed anyone or went outside the Imperial law. As she stood in the dungeon, old pains became new ambitions.

Perhaps... perhaps the time had come to redeem her sister. Celestia would need everyone for the initiative that was to come.


It may have been dark, the walls and floor may have been cold masonry, and the chains binding her hooves to a corner may have been heavy, but at least the hay bed Luna lay on was dry and was warm to the touch. The silence was nearly unbearable, as the only sound in the lone prison cell was the sound of Luna’s breathing. Sometimes, Luna wondered if it would mattered if she stopped breathing. Her betrayal was complete. Nightmare Moon was defeated, and Luna paid the price. Now, the only thing to do was wait for reality to unwind, or for sleep to come. Whichever happened first.

Luna was startled when the thick metal door on the other side of the room flew off it’s hinges with a loud metallic bang, sailed over Luna’s weak form, and made a door-shaped hole in the wall behind Luna. Luna, however, was paying more attention to the one making such a grand entrance. Celestia stood like a white and gold ghost that had come to claim her soul. Power glowed from her very being, and with that, an overwhelming sense of authority not seen before in this world or since.

However, upon seeing her little sister, something about Celestia changed. Before, her expression was hardened, and her pose rigid, as is proper for an Empress. However, seeing Luna in her sorry state altered Celestia’s mood greatly. With drooped wings and half-orchestrated movements, Celestia approached the former Empress Luna with a countenance that spoke of a blow to her inner core. Luna could even see tears welling in the Solar Empress’ eyes.

As unexpected as not only seeing Celestia again, Luna could not have predicted suddenly being seized and then just simply held by a shuddering Celestia. There was no decorum, no announcement. This wasn’t the Empress coming to visit. This was Luna’s big sister, the one who had endured with Luna through thick and thin, and even after all this time, Luna could not help but join with her sister in the embrace, and shed a few tears of her own.

“I am sorry.”

The tears became sorrowful laughter, and Empress Luna held Empress Celestia not as sovereigns of state, but as sisters. The Long Night was over. The Nightmare was banished. Luna had been dutifully punished for giving in to the demon. Now, she was being set free. Free to stand in the sun again.

No longer would Luna have to suffer gruel that barely qualified as food. No longer would Celestia have to bear the eternities with alicorns that, despite having known them for centuries, were still strangers to her. No longer would Luna suffer chains and afflictions because of a mistake she made a millenia ago. Now, they could stand together as sisters, and take to the future together.

The Empire still had need of the both of them, however.


It had been several months after Luna’s release, and Luna was now back at the peak of her former strength, and any who objected were shown just how powerful that was. The time had finally come, after Luna had recovered from her imprisonment, that planning for the invasion of Earth would take place. Celestia would suffer not that she planned alone.

“Verily, ‘tis a complicated and dangerous situation, sister.” commented Luna as she observed the rearranged War Room. Instead of a single table with a single world map, the simpler table had been replaced with a much larger display that had room for grand maps of both worlds, Equestria and Earth. However, the map of Earth was woefully empty. How could the Empresses invade such a world when they knew so little of it?

Celestia nodded her head, and affirmed, “Yes, sister. There is a troubling lack of knowledge as far as our own capability versus theirs. You and the Lunar Guard are the best candidates for this reconnaissance mission. We must be wary of their strengths and be able to exploit their weaknesses. We must know if we can disrupt their movements. Their communications. Their leadership. The unity and the stability of their lands. We must know if and how we can achieve division and anarchy so we can simply go in and conquer them, despite their advantage.”

Luna frowned. This was not unlike Celestia. Usually, the Empire had the advantage. How could this be different now? Celestia must have noticed, because she continued, “Yes, Sister. No longer do we hold the advantage when it comes to technology. Because the humans have never had access to magic, they have had to make do. Take, for instance... artillery.”

An airy display leapt into existence at Celestia’s behest. Luna immediately recognized the recently ascended Alicorn of Artillery, Pinkamena Diane Pie. She was standing alongside one of her namesakes. A mighty cannon, that can hurl a round iron projectile a great distance. With some practice, her gunners can nail target most targets within a few volleys, or less. Luna immediately recalled that while cannons were not a recent invention, Pinkamena took the concept of bombardment from a simple concept to an art form, with techniques ranging from creeping barrage to standing and box barrages. They were particularly effective at quashing the Zebra Rebellion of Koujo the Bard. Turns out that being able to rally thousands of individuals for a cause through creative use of music did not render one’s self or one’s crowd immune to the munitions and ordnance of the Alicorn of Artillery.

Luna, however, sensed that Celestia would not just show the image of the pink princess and her cannons, and merely waited. Surely enough, another image that was taken from another’s perspective appeared. This would probably have been taken from the memories of the human prisoner they currently held. Several uniformed humans surrounded a cannon-like device, but there were several things different about it. The barrel of the field gun was longer and thinner, and there was a mechanical housing that held high the barrel of the human weapon. Two large metal wedges flared out from the housing, holding the entire field artillery in place. The weapon fired, and the barrel recoiled into the housing, pressing into the wedges. The projectile first shot away, and then out of view in the distant sky. An impressive feat, Luna mused. How far could the weapon fire?

“18 kilometers, Luna.” was all that Celestia needed to say.

The shock on Luna’s face was palpable. Quickly running through her recollection of the feats of the Alicorn of Artillery, the corps had managed to finally breach the 2 kilometer range mark with the latest in cannons and ammunition which included rifling and other such innovations. Were it merely a shooting war between armies, the humans would win. However, it would not be a mere shooting war. Luna remarked that artillery alone would not win the day here.

“What of our mages and our warlocks? They have none. They are at a disadvantage there.”

Celestia nodded, and replied, “This is true, Luna. We have a vital advantage there, one that we can use full advantage of. However, I do not want our little ponies to be relying on something that may or may not matter in the face of overwhelming firepower and technological marvels. It is not just cannons that the humans wield. It is so much more. We must make their innovations our own. I will not commit to a foalish course of action that could lead to the destruction of the Empire and her armies. Magic will not be enough this time, as much as it pains me to say it.”

Luna looked into Celestia’s serene face, searching her features for any sign of an internal struggle between potential courses of action, but found no such division in her thoughts. Celestia genuinely believed that this course of action was the best, and she would doggedly pursue it until it was proven, or that flaws began to manifest themselves. To say that Luna should ease proceedings by following along would be an understatement. Celestia was not one to be crossed, and Luna especially knew this.

With a twinge of heartbreak, Celestia said, “I do not want this to be a protracted war, dear sister. The Empire has suffered too much already. I have suffered too much already. Too many brave little soldiers gave away their lives in pointless battles by foolish generals. Too many cities have burned, and too many innocents have died by my actions. If I can make this a bloodless war, I will.”

Looking into Luna’s eyes, Celestia set her gaze to that of resignation and determination. She continued, “However, an enemy is still an enemy. We must not let the light of Civilization be dimmed by barbarism and elements that are beyond my control. There is peace in this world. There is no such peace in theirs. Ponies and other races have become fast friends and hasn’t let petty differences lead to civil war with me. These humans seek to destroy the other all the time, despite a growing commitment to peace. There can be no peace on Earth without guidance. There can be no peace without the Solar Empire.”

Celestia’s gaze hardened, and she became more of the mare Luna knew. Celestia announced, “I do not hate peace. I’m invading this world of tribes because I love peace.”

Celestia turned to the empty map of Earth, and pondered for a while. She then looked to Luna, and asked, “What... would you suppose the best means of reconnaissance is, then? How may we remain undetected and seek out the weaknesses of man?”

Luna also thought on this, looking between Equestria and Earth, exploring her ancient memories of any experience that might help here, or be of any relevancy. She had no experience invading an entire different world, but she did have hooves-on information regarding the subtle subversion of foreign lands, and so took to that for ideas.

A few came to mind. Luna grinned, and a glint shone in her eye. She advised, “Dear sister, I may have a few stratagems we may use this day. I suggest that we adapt the Changeling Collective’s tactics, as well as our changeling citizens and their knowledge of disguise magic. If we walk among humans as humans, no one will suspect anything.”

Celestia smiled. She always knew her sister had a knack for the inconspicuous. With a smirk, she inquired of Luna teasingly, “What else would you suggest, my devious sister?”

Luna laughed, and then replied, “It is obvious. We will need collaborators.”

Celestia’s smirk fell. That was a word she was well-acquainted with. Many rebellious elements had collaborated with enemies of Equestria in the past, and had paid the price for it. That Luna would be willing to employ humans that were disloyal to their own kind... it was a troubling prospect.

With a nervous smile and wave of armored hooves, Luna explained, “No no, dear sister. I am not referring to the act of purchasing loyalty from those whose fleeting loyalty could be purchased with coin. Perish the thought. I am instead implying that we should use means more significant than money to secure the help of collaborators. What we can offer may not be measured in coin or purse, but something that has moved the hearts of all of us. Something that we still fight for.”

Cocking an eyebrow and tilting her head, Celestia asked in honest curiosity, “What would that be? What could move the hearts of men to follow us and the Empire?”

With a winning grin, Luna merely replied, “We can offer them security for themselves and their families. A future that is as rich as it is glorious. We can offer them the chance to work, the chance to eat, and the chance to live their lives to the fullest. We can offer them that which all beings need most. Something all beings have needed since time immemorial, and that which you yourself first offered your little ponies when you first became Empress."

"What we can offer them, dear sister, is hope.”


It was a quiet night, and the garden was at peace. The stillness was only disturbed by the rustling of the leaves, and the occasional scampering of little critters, ill content to remain still in the dead of night, when all other creatures found it easy to rest.

Luna was not one of those creatures to easily find herself asleep, especially at times such as these, the eve of a new operation and potential conquest.

“All is ready?”

A detachment of her Royal Night Guard, as well as a section of loyal changelings, stood in the secluded Lunar courtyard. Their transformed forms stood, towering over their mage and their Legionnaire peers. The courtyard itself was a work of beauty, with many nocturnal plants and flowers turning to full blossoms in the light of the moon. Many such plants glowed a bright blue, casting a soft light on the whole proceeding. It was often said that the night was Luna’s personal empire, the Imperium Noctra, and she had started to believe it again.

Flexing her shoulders, Luna grinned. These disguises were perfect. A considerable effort was levied to both complete the physical disguises as well as the accuracy of the clothing of the humans. The coverings, the teeth of these new creatures, and even the hair were successfully copied from the prisoner’s memories, and altered for a new look. The infiltrators should be completely conspicuous, as they should fit right in.

It didn’t hurt that the sunglasses were quite fetching on the brunette disguise.

With purse and walking shoes, tee and jeans, Luna considered herself quite a normal-looking human being, which suited her purposes quite well. While much of the Earth was unknown to the Empress, measures could still be taken to ensure a safe mass teleport. Magical scans had already been conducted on Earth, and while the scholars argue about the unused arcane fields of the Earth, Luna and her escort would be teleported to places of human concentration. While teleporting to an edge of a human settlement had its risks, Luna forgone the most dense of gatherings and had chosen a site with a modest amount of humans in it. While the major population centers were still to be infiltrated, making sure the first step would not be misplaced would be key.

With a command, the group vanished into thin air.


It was the dead of night at the insertion point. It was a peaceful affair, and the place was lit by a full moon. Dry grasses covered the fields, and there was a road of some asphalt construction nearby. Rolling hills covered in sagebrush crossed the distances and lined the limits of the vision of the invaders.

The road itself was of a most curious construction. It was built from an asphalt paste, with lines of white and yellow painted along the length of the road. Smoother squares lined the edges of the road, with some more concrete to hold it all in place. This was surely one of the human’s numerous innovations that Luna would learn how to copy, as it was a fine-looking road, indeed.

After having checked their disguises one final time, Luna and her party set out to a nearby settlement, lit up by tall lamps that casted a shade of light on the ground. Keeping to the roads, the group set out. After a while, it became clear that they did not know a single thing about this world, or even this town. That was something they had to correct as soon as possible. Luna ordered, “Find me a bookkeep.”

After a moment of confusion, one of the guards quietly advised, “You mean a library, Empress?” Luna turned to soldier with a sombre, thoughtful look.

She nodded with a brooding look, and clarified, “Yes. A library. That would be most prudent. Come.”

As the Empress commanded, so they flew. The streets were abandoned and mighty buildings of concrete, wood, and metal stood. Some were short, some were tall. Some were big, and some were small. Some buildings, like the buildings Luna suspected to be living domiciles, were standardized, with only minute differences between them. Some, like businesses or buildings with other functions, varied in shape and construction design.

Luna could already see in the moonlight well, but with the humans’ apparent obsession with putting these tall lamps everywhere, even a Solar Guard could make his way around at night. Finally, after having wandered through various neighborhoods as stealthily as possible, it seemed that a clue was finally granted to the earthly infiltrators. A building was located, one with a book for a sign, and that was the key. Being night, the facility was closed, so it was decided that they would make camp on the roof of the establishment.

There was no need to climb, as all there present had wings. Anyone watching the group’s collective ascent to the highest point would see a human leaping up the wall at an unnatural height and speed, when it was the natural ability of those present that made the task possible without the aid of any rigging or ropes. Having made safe the roof, and having put down cots and having erected a protective magical shield that would conceal all within from sight, the Imperials rested, but rested warily. Luna herself was the last to sleep, not because of the pressure of the mission, but because of something else.

She was supposed to be the steward of the moon, and back home, it was true enough. However, this world was... fundamentally different. She could not yet determine if this was a good thing or a bad thing. The grass looked different. The sky looked different. The clouds looked different. Even the moon, her namesake, was different. It was a familiar shade of blue-white, but at the same time, it was as alien to her as would be a moon that was any other color. It could not have been more strange to her than if it were made of cheese or blood.

Either way, something... was wrong. She could not exert her will over it, as if it was simply not hers to command. She reached out with her magical will but found only emptiness to spite her. Reaching beyond, she couldn’t feel the magical field of the moon interact with her own magic. It was as if it was simply not there. Perhaps she didn’t reach far enough.

In any case, the magical field of this world also felt wrong. It was... for the lack of a better term... dusted and disused. It was like flexing a muscle that had previously been left to the atrophy of time, and using magic was just as difficult now as when Luna was but a mere filly. The magical field did not flow as strong in this world, nor as easily. Clearly, there were no magic users in this plane. That was a pity, Luna remarked as she lay in her cot. It would seem that the arcane was one field that no creature on this planet could even attempt to breach. It would seem that the mages would have their work cut out for them in the future, after the land was secured.

With that last thought, Luna fell asleep in the light of an unfamiliar moon in the odd human town. It was all so familiar, with the same trees and the same birds as hime. Even the grass here was as green as was the grass back in Equestria. The only thing that made this world completely alien and new to Luna, then, was the humans.


The dream realms were a strange place. For Empress Luna, this used to be a familiar strangeness. Her domain was the night, and her kingdom was the unconscious realm. Now? It was empty. Void of what normally would occupy this place. Yet, Luna could only sense and enter the dreams of those who had accompanied her. Reaching beyond with umbral sight, the only thing to be found were ghosts.

Whispers of dreams, something promised but never gave. The dream realm of the human world was akin to a void, where all human consciousness had to have rested, but never found a magical awakening in this weird new reality. Soon enough, though, it was time to rise.

“Empress! Empress! I beseech thee to rise!” hissed a Lunar Lieutenant. Blinking sleep from her vision, Luna arose.

Correcting a piece of shirt, Luna inquired, “Any news to report, my faithful servant?”

Nodding his head, the Lieutenant lifted a piece of the shelter, and pointed at the entrance below. He remarked, “See, the library is open. We must raid it as soon as we can, before we are discovered.”

Looking around, Luna saw the other members of the expeditionary task force chowing down silently on cold rations, something that Luna herself despised since the invention of stoves and ovens. Why they couldn’t make a fire or even set up a camping stove was something that Luna understood, but still despised all the same. She had quite enough of oatmeal bars when Discord reigned, and it would seem that these simple meals would be a universal constant, even in this world.

Waving aside the notion, Luna ordered, “No. We are not yet discovered, nor do they suspect that we are otherworldly invaders. There is no need to rouse suspicion of us. We go in, and we learn all we can. Do we have the materials ready?”

Another soldier, stumbling sleepily over a few cots, took the time to produce a bunch of books, all of which were empty. “We are ready to copy information on your command, Empress. Just give us the word, and we’ll copy everything down that we see.”

Luna regarded the soldier with a turn of the head, and declared, “Make sure it is non-fiction. History books, political commentary, atlases that you take copies of. We must not bog down our analysts with meaningless fiction. We’ll have all the time in the world to read human fables later. Now, we move.”

With a series of practiced, swift, and precise motions, everything was picked up and moved into the packs of the soldiers present. The proceeding was silent as could be, but there were still muffled curses as minor noises were made. These noises would be as loud as the squeaking of a mouse, but even that could still get them discovered, potentially.

Even Luna thought it was a bit excessive to have such operational security in a civilian town such as this, but appreciated the gesture all the same. The sentries, having scanned the streets and the buildings for any wary activity, motioned the group on. Swiftly, yet silently, the group invaders dropped into the brush, and rolled out onto the sidewalk. Having gathered again, Luna lead the group into the library. This would be... most illuminating.


“How did the mission go?” inquired Empress Celestia. She and Empress Luna were seated in the War Room, with a new, fresh map of Earth on display. The continents and isles of man were in full view, and Celestia saw with some incredulousness that the land was divided up into so many small tribes, kingdoms, and empires. The biggest empire land-wise was obviously Russia, to Celestia’s untrained eye. Perhaps it is in a period of conquest and expansion.

Still, she waited on Luna’s report before assigning such a trait to that expansive nation. As the disguise had yet to wear off, Luna still looked like a human. Even now, though, Celestis could see the apprehension that was present in Luna’s face, as well as the restless fidgeting that showed itself in Luna’s posture. Obviously, the mission went well, but she was shaken up about something. Luna recited, “We have learned many things about the humans, sister. The more we learn about these peoples, the more gargantuan this task seems to be. We can’t force the Earth to her knees with just brute force, Sister. There would be a hostile with the means to kill us behind every hill and behind every tree.”

This information was tough to digest for the would-be conqueror. Indeed, having to fight for every hill and for every tree would prove... most problematic. A more measured approach was truly the tactic to have taken, as a wiser and less bloody approach... for the invader.

“What we must do is achieve Divide Et Impera, Luna.” mused the Solar Empress. Yes, that would be the key. For the nations of this world to be turned on one another, or against themselves. A state of complete disarray would allow the Solar Empire to come not as a conquering force, but as liberators.

“Understood, Sister. It will be done.” answered Luna. She bowed, an easy feat for a human, and departed.

There was a lot of work to be done.


Empress Luna and her Lunar guards waited in the long grass near a significant human contraption. The darkness helped shield them, as did the plants that reached higher than their prone forms. The stealth suits that used magic to bend light didn’t hurt, either.

As they waited, they saw a signature distortion of light that signaled an approaching pegasus. With empty saddlebags, the last dark-armored pegasus returned from the delivery run, with a soft swish of feathers, and the skid of horseshoes on dirt. Making his way to the lookout point, all was ready for the show. All Luna had to do was give the command.

“Detonate.”

With a button press, all hell broke loose. One of most sensitive and precious of human constructions, the oil refinery was set afire. The metal housing of the intricate machine, with all the safeties removed and the contingencies disabled, the facility couldn’t help but be engulfed in fire. Pillars of fire spouted from many steel towers, and the mortal men who could flee were away, as animals before a fire. Those who could not flee... were consumed by the titanic firestorm. All eyes were on the conflagration, and that included the instigators and culprits of the disaster.

Luna, with her experts in human technology, sat in a hide, camouflaged with magic, and witnessed the carnage. She witnessed the despair of men and women who escaped, as their livelihoods were ruined. She witnessed the mournful wails of those who had lost all, who had lost friends, coworkers, and family the blaze. Luna witnessed the futile efforts of emergency workers to contain the incident, and ultimately were forced back by the force of the fire.

What this meant to the humans was perfectly clear to the invaders. Without oil, many machines in the human economy and private lives would cease to function. With this bad a disaster, acquiring oil elsewhere just became more expensive, as well as problematic. This stunt had previously been executed elsewhere, and a panic had spread amongst the populace, as well as the governments of the world. That some rogue element would target modern infrastructure, the very thing that enabled humans everywhere in this world to live modern lives and experience the comforts afforded them by high proficiency in technology would be endangered. To many there, the fire was a sign of the despair of the times.

Luna thought it made for a good bonfire as the flames reached high, and the heat reached wide. However, the Lunar Empress was already getting quite bored of this brand of destruction. She had seen it before. She had caused it. She searched her head for new targets for destruction. Perhaps something else of a different nature that could further sow discord and distrust between human nations. Having thought of something promising, Luna smiled, and kept watching the fireworks.


Celestia read the news ticker that had recently been installed in the War Room. It had been a year to the day since the first incursion to Earth. The humans called the day of first incursion... the 10th of October, in the year 2010. Yes, that’s what they called it.

‘A most curious device’, Celestia pondered. It consisted of many technologies still relatively alien to the denizens of Equestria, yet many of the facets of the technology was the same. Wiring, electric lights, and even logic gates of computing were already something Celestia had been familiar with, but the extent to which humans had mastered these concepts and to the ridiculous degree that the same devices were readily available to most humans still amazed the Empress.

It would be most impressive to see what humans would accomplish under her enlightened rule.

Sipping on her tea, Celestia mournfully read the headlines dutifully, for any sign of compromise on the part of Luna and her infiltrators, as well as the human collaborators. For servants, humans could be quite useful, indeed. As her new favorite and most faithful butler, Marcus, refilled her scone and tea supply, with his deft and nimble hands, Celestia couldn’t help but imagine the two worlds already under her control. All kinds of all races would mingle together in peace and harmony, made possible by her and her servants’ efforts. All it would take is a few more years of this undermining, and everyone would benefit from this new Golden Age of peace, prosperity, and an era of unprecedented technological marvels.

Her train of thought was interrupted as another report came through the ticker. Luna, with the aid of collaborators, had set afire to another oil field as well as leveling another of the human’s tall buildings, with many human leaders still inside it. The... UN General Assembly, it was called. It was a shame that these peace-loving humans had to die, and it was a tragedy for these futuristic marvels to be destroyed.

But destroy they must; the human’s modern world must be toppled before Celestia could build another, better one from the ashes.


Inside the cramped space of the human weapon, Stellis worked carefully in the mess of metal and colorful wires. Perched precariously on the lid of the hatch on top of the weapon, the dark bat pony with emerald eyes was faintly lit up by the soft, electric lights of the underground silo. Stellis, as a batpony, usually loved underground places. They offered shelter and safety from the blinding light of the Empress’ day. This place, however, was different.

Instead of stone walls, or brick pillars, the room was lined with a concrete that seemed to steal warmth from the very air. Shivering a bit underneath the alien soil, Stellis refocused on her work in this unnaturally silent place. The metal catwalks surrounding the giant human city-killer gently creaked with age.

It still sent shivers down Stellis’ spine to know the destructive power of the very device she was working to render useless. According to the human’s own history, there was a time when the mass use of these devices was a very real possibility, and one that would have rendered a toxic winter upon the whole of the world. A winter that could end whole races and cultures. A winter that would potentially render entire areas sterile for generations to come. While that time has gone, these weapons remained.

Bringing herself back to the present, Stellis dug into her saddle-bag and withdrew a complicated and ornate golden disc from within. It held many runes and was lined at the edges and center with rubies of many variety of gem and crystal. While she did not understand how this would function, Stellis was assured that this would render the human apocalypse generator useless. It would fry circuits, alter characteristics of materials within the deadly device, and would make this weapon overall completely unsalvageable.

Setting the disc down gently, Stellis nestled it in the heart of this cold beast. She pressed her hoof down in the carving of a horseshoe in the center, and the device glowed brilliantly but for a moment. After the multihue light show was over, Stellis quickly scanned the area for any indication of life. Finding none, she retrieved the disc, resettled herself, and began the work of reassembly. The humans must remain oblivious as to what had transpired here.

As she worked, Stellis thought on the lives she potentially had just saved. Human families, with fathers, mothers, and children. As she worked, Stellis recalled the human settlements she hid out in. She thought that they had been spared the monstrosity, too. She had been to the briefings. These were only ever used twice, and the result of their use had been horrific. She would never quite forget what she had seen that had been documented of the people that had survived the detonations.

They had escaped with their lives intact, but a portion of them had died that day. If not from losing their families, then from losing their homes. If not from losing their homes, than from losing their communities. If not from losing their communities, than from losing their sense of safety and security. There is a degree to which monstrous acts could be committed in war, but this far exceeded any sane measure of population control. The worst part? Less humans had died there than if they had let their war continue without those weapons, to her understanding.

Stellis worked slowly to put the last bolt in place on the panel that concealed mankind’s worst secret. Finishing, she put her multitool back into her saddlebag. Looking at the gray aluminum of the disabled weapon, Stellis felt a weight lift from her shoulders. ‘Soon, she thought. ‘Soon, these will all be but a bitter memory of a time before the Empresses.’

Even now, the humans suffered under the yoke of their fellow men. Even now, the fallible leaders of men waged war in the name of an unseen, divine being, or in the name of preserving the old order, or in order to further their own standing in the world their fathers had built with their own bones. The nation states of humanity now numbered fewer, as lawlessness took hold in the poorer and less stable regions of the world.

Stellis was perfectly aware that this very lawlessness was caused by the hoof of the Lunar Princess and that of agents like Stellis, but it was Stellis’ hope that this will ultimately save more humans than it destroyed. There were new horrors caused by her and her people, but it was necessary to starve those lawless regions of the world.

Still necessary was the division of the rich nations that was engineered by Stellis and the Lunar Guard. The malcontents and the angry were given the means to rise up against their leaders, and had done so. The resulting wars and destruction that was wrought were terrible to behold, as was the further damage and sabotage committed by Imperial agents to the human infrastructure under the cloak of the smokescreen the chaos of rebellion and revolution created. However, Stellis kept those new images from deterring her from her goal. Destruction now is worth resulting in no destruction at all later.

Shaking herself from her musings, and checking over the job she had one one more time, Stellis pulled herself back to the present. The sword of Damocles that hung over mankind’s head had been destroyed. The self-annihilation of man was no longer a likely or unlikely prospect. As terrible as what they were doing is, Stellis smiled. She would commit many more crimes against man before she let them destroy themselves. It was the right thing to do, and it is what the Empresses willed. Grinning, she took a chord handle on her gear in her that activated the recall equipment. It was adapted from a human invention. The gear inside was stowed inside a human backpack; specifically one that they wore to participate in an activity known as skydiving. As Stellis’ teleport gear functioned from her pulling the handle, she took pride in what she had accomplished.

Her job was done here. Many more were to be done before peace on Earth would be established.


In the War Room, a heavy, thick, and uneasy air filled the room. There currently was a real danger that existed that brought a chill down Celestia’s spine. A project of Luna’s had come to a successful completion, and the fruits of her and her servants’ labor sat before Celestia and Luna. Celestia could not be more tense, and her senses could not be any more offended by Luna’s new offerings.

“Are you sure this is a wise course of action, Luna?” Celestia earnestly urged. Surely, there was a better means.

With a solemn nod, Luna spoke, “Indeed. These... devices will be most... useful for our purposes.”

Celestia looked down at those damnable things. They were stolen right from under the humans’ collective noses, and Celestia couldn’t be more displeased with that fact. They were devices of such destructive power that even the humans were legitimately terrified of them, and had so only used them twice in their history.

Celestia didn’t know whenever or not she could contain the destructive force of these apocalyptic machines. She never wanted to find out; this was a mystery she was perfectly content with never solving.

Luna had brought a dozen of them to the War Room. The shells of the devices were painted olive green, and there were many warnings inscribed onto the surface of the bullet-like casing. If Celestia squinted, she could imagine it to be mere artillery shells, and not potential harbingers of atomic destruction that could bring the end of the world. Luna sighed, “Indeed. The region the humans call ‘The Middle East’ is a war-riddled land. Its people are divided. However, a state of technical peace exists between these nations, as well as their allies elsewhere. By detonating these in the most densely populated cities here, and in their allies’ nations, we can spark a war to rival the wars the humans had fought nearly a century ago.”

Images quickly flashed through Celestia’s mind. Casualty figures, the wreck and skeletons of once-mighty cities, and the falling, burning wreckage of gleaming, majestic flying machines. This would be a terrible war... one so terrible that Celestia thought for a moment that this was going too far, not to mention what the suffering that the actual nuclear bombings would cause. Thankfully, the humans’ arsenal of such weapons were long since discreetly disarmed by Lunar Agents a few months after they were discovered, two years ago. Now, only Celestia and Luna’s Empire would be considered by the humans to be a nuclear nation. Celestia shook from her stupor, and begged Luna, “We-We will use only a few and destroy the rest, and that’s if we must. The intended effect can still be achieved without the use of such terrible things. We m-must keep the dead from outnumbering the living, and keep ourselves from becoming monsters.”

With a solemn and determined nod, Luna took those hellish mechanical abominations and left the War Room. What had happened to the Empresses, and to Equestria, when the use of Weapons of Mass Destruction was seriously contemplated?


It had been four years, and the work was progressing as nicely as could be, given the nature of the work. The major human nations had committed themselves to war against one another, and the wars had run their course. The nations were weary of war, and had wanted to turn to peace. Thus, it became necessary to entice the enemy within.

With no small amount of reservation, Luna had levied no small amount of funds, supplies, and equipment to be given to rebellious elements within the major powers. These militias had formed together and sewn a schism between peoples, colors, religions, and cultures. Luna sat in the War Room, now overflowing with adapted human technology. It always brought no small amount of happiness to the Empresses that the labcoats and the scholars were always learning so much, and that the engineers were building so much. The adaptability of her Empire was always a nice sight to see.

The military had approved of the new technology, as well. Certainly, the Mages of Princess Twilight Sparkle’s court benefitted from computers, as well as the Alicorn of Logistics, Applejack, being able to benefit from improved agricultural methods as well as better transportation. The Alicorn of Aviation, Rainbow Dash, certainly benefitted with her new fleet of fast, small, and agile flying machines at her command. A new generation of Royal Guard to match the endless potential of the Empire.

The Alicorn of Healing, Fluttershy, most definitely benefitted from the improved medical knowledge as well as the significantly more effective medicines and healing spells that came about as a result. The Alicorn of the Arts, Rarity, also benefited from the humans. Being able to so readily digest and understand human literature and mass media was a skill many ponies, including Empress Celestia, was envious of.

Of course, Pinkie Pie loved the new party cannons.

The Royal Guard swapped out their spears for rifles and other human weapons when the time and the order came. Of course, many of the instruments themselves had to be adapted to the anatomy of the Equestrians, but it was a manageable feat. Celestia liked to imagine what a human’s reaction would be to a minotaur comfortably shouldering a 12.7 millimeter machine gun. Shock? Amazement? Fear?

Empress Celestia would find out soon enough. However, the effect of Divide Et Impera had not been sufficiently achieved. She must fund more rebels. She must start more wars. She must break up more alliances, and spread more distrust amongst the hearts of men.

It wasn’t an easy thing, or an expedient thing, but the work was still progressing along.


To the humans, the year was 2016. To Equestria and to the Empresses, it was judgement day. What the humans might call D-Day. The hope and prayers of every male, female, and child in the Empire would be answered or ignored within the next few weeks.

Celestia herself walked with her customary armor, the gold reflecting her status as sovereign of the world. It had been altered since she wore it last to war. No more was crude or careless material or archaic design used in the craftsmanship of the set. Underneath the shine, ballistic plate lined the armor, and flexible, protective weave underlined the armor. For the standards of Equestrians and Earthlings alike, the armor was nigh-impenetrable. Before, magic solely gave Celestia’s suit of armor any protective qualities at all. Now, that magic was backed up by thick, heavy pieces of hybrid materials, designed to protect against all weapons that could be conceivably be used on the Empress.

The same protection was offered to her Lieutenants, Centurions, and Legionnaires, of all shapes and sizes. Ponies stood with Griffons, Griffons stood with Diamond Dogs, Diamond Dogs stood with Drakes, Drakes stood with Zebras, Zebras stood with Minotaurs, and Minotaurs stood with Ponies. They all stood next to the Alicorns, the rightful rulers of the two worlds. Beyond, even golden-clad humans could be seen, their new allies standing next to their own, brandishing the new Royal Equestrian Service Rifle. No adaptation was necessary for the newest members of the Equestrian Military to use these weapons, and, for that, the Empress was grateful.

By her side, in finely-groomed silk and linen, stood Marcus. The now experienced and eager servant had been free for several years after his capture, after a bargain was struck to improve his accommodations in return for service to the Empress. It had been an awkward acclimation period, one rife with subtle, yet cute acts of defiance on the part of Marcus. Now, he was as common a sight in the Imperial Palace as any maid or servant, and for that, Celestia had hope.

Hope that this new race would see reason, and hope that the light of civilization would not blind mankind to the possibilities of the wise guidance and leadership of the immortal Empresses and the rest of Alicorn Kind. These brave souls, bound to be in this world ad eternum, would make for far better leaders than those whose fleeting lust for power or material wealth doomed their nations and peoples to war and poverty, because of their eternal vigilance.

Equipment of all sizes and shapes littered the training field everybody was in. There was some food, water, and other essential supplies. Others was ammunition, and extra sets of armor. The equipment that ate the most attention, however, was the consoles and large, circular metal pads that were meticulously crafted and carefully assembled for one task.

Invasion.

An entire battalion would be able to be sent at once to wherever they were needed, and as the last of the trial runs and tests were conducted, the air was charged with an electricity of both the arcane, and the sensation of nervousness and excitement in the guts of all gathered there in equal measure. The powerful energies sparked and crackled, and the platoon was retrieved from Saddle Arabia. The testing phase was complete. No more speeches were there to be had, nor were there any sign of doubt, or hesitation. The posture of the would-be invaders spoke of confidence, but their eyes whispered of uncertainty.

Nevertheless, they made ready for war.

“Ponies of the Solar Empire! Griffons of the Solar Empire! Minotaurs of the Solar Empire! Dragons of the Empire! Diamond Dogs of the Solar Empire! Zebras of the Solar Empire! Men of the Solar Empire! Today is the day we have been waiting for! We have not had a good war in hundreds of years, now that we in command of the world! Equestria is now under the jurisdiction of the Empire, because of the sacrifices and valor of your forefathers! There now exists a new world, a new world to take! Under the heavenly guidance of the Empresses and the Alicorns, we shall seize control of this new world, and reap all the benefits of their culture and technology! They shall know our enlightened rule! Theirs will be ours, and ours will be theirs, for we are all one under the Empresses! Now go! Make the Empire proud!”

The pounding of boots against cobblestone was a marching song to Celestia’s ears, one that she had not heard in quite some time. Sure, she had her fair share of parades, but this was different. Those were the footfalls of soldiers at peacetime. This... this was the determined march of an army about to march for her and her empire. The gleaming shields and the pointed spears of old had now given away to the matte uniforms and the barrels of the rifles of today.

Her heartbeat resonated with the footfalls of the soldiers. Be it a quadruped or biped soldier, their march resonated with the warrior Celestia. The very same Celestia that had slain the demon Discord and the very same that had banished chaos and barbarism forever from the world. The very same Celestia who overthrew the tyrants of the other kingdoms and republics of the world to establish her rule. The very same Celestia who had conquered the world and forced a golden age to continuously reign over her people.

The same Celestia who would now invade another world for the same reason she invaded this world. Not because of the glory it would bring or the new taxes that could be levied against a new people. Not because of anything material or anything that she personally could benefit, but because of the necessity of it. As long as Celestia could bring light to the world, to bring the benefits of her reign to more and more citizens of whatever race they might be, she had an obligation to.

After all, who could defy the Empress?


Author's Note

Thank you, reader, for humoring me and my insanity.

Thank you, my friends, for being my friends.

Yes. Even you.

Have a good one.

Jee I sure could use an editor, huh?