The Muffin Mare

It had been almost a week since the staged incident between the two criminals and Derpy and Coin had been planning out every single step to their revenge, while Bit was just the accomplice towards it. At one point though, Coin realized that it wasn’t safe because of the powers the so called “Muffin Mare” harnessed. Yet, he still wanted revenge, and decided he was going to have it, he had already finished the plan, now all he needed was a name to fight against her with.

“A name Bit! I need a name!” he said to Bit rather harshly, as if expecting Bit to already have a name ready for Coin to use.

“I don’t know Coin! I’m thinking but nothing comes out!” he said while pointing a hoof towards his head “I mean, I can’t think of a name that has to do with hurting a muffin! Besides! I love muffins! I don’t want to hurt them anyway! Let alone murder one!” he stated almost if saying he was in love with a muffin.

“Oh! That’s a great one! The Muffin Murderer!” he said while waving his hoof around in the air from side to side to add emphasis to his words.

“No, that’s way too gory for me Coin, we’re not murdering a confection.” Bit stated.

“Ok, so Confection… Killer? Yeah! The Confection Killer!” he said with a smile of glee on his face.

Bit sighed “Fine, whatever. It’s not like we’re going to be famous or anything and our name will matter.” he said, finally giving in to the whims of Coin.

“Ok, so what do you say we go find her and follow her around? Spy on her.” Coin asked.

Bit didn’t even dignify the question with an answer, instead he just made a grunt of approval while he got up and put his bags on and made his way for the door “But… How are we going to even going to start with finding her Coin? We don’t even know anything about her, except for the fact that her eyes are cross. There could be millions of cross eyed ponies here!” he asked while making his way through the streets.

“Well, we could start with asking somepony first! I doubt it’ll be hard to find a cross eyed pony in the midst of the smallest town in Equestria, Ponyville. It’ll be easy man, trust me.” Coin said trying to convince Bit that everything would be easier than they expected “Watch this.” he said while walking up to a random pony “Hey! Excuse me. This may sound mean but, do you know a pony with kind of… Umm… Messed up eyes?” he said while pointing a hoof towards his eyes and moving it in small circles.

The other pony started to think “Oh! I think you mean Derpy! Why are you wondering?” she asked confused why someone would be looking for the most innocent mare she knew.

“Oh, I… Uh… Met her the other day, she was really nice… and… I forgot to ask her for her name… and… Stuff… Do you know where I can find her at this time?” Coin asked trying to pry more information from the young mare in front of him.

“Yeah, she works as a mail mare for Equestria Postal Service. It’s actually right down the road over there.” she said while pointing a hoof towards a street behind them and towards the end yielded a bigger building with ponies moving in and out from it.

“Ah, thanks lady. You were some mighty help! I don’t think I would’ve ever found her again if not for you!” Coin said while giving her a big smile and patting her shoulder with his hoof before departing with her and nudging Bit to follow him on his way down the street.

“So Coin… What are we going to do when we find her?” he asked confused with why they were going to the mail office so early.

“We’re going to wait here… ‘till she gets out of work. That way we can follow her to her house. Then get revenge the way we planned.” he said confidently as though his plan was going to work without fault.

-------------------- Eight Hours Later --------------------

Derpy had just finished her shift and was getting ready to walk out of the building, while Bit and Coin were waiting for her outside near the street on a bench, next to some green pony who apparently never learned how to sit properly.

“Coin. I’m. BORED. I’M ALSO TIRED.” Bit said trying to convince his friend to go home and forget about revenge for now.

“BIT. FOR THE LAST TIME. WE’RE NOT LEAVING. She should be out here any minute now anyways.” he said hopefully, although he was getting rather impatient on waiting as well. Then, as if right on cue, Derpy had flung the front doors open and made her way out of the building, not to mention started walking along the road.

“Ok Bit, let’s go. This is what we’ve been waiting all day for.” Coin said while getting off the bench and walking in the direction of Derpy. Then, much to their surprise, Derpy slowly gets off the ground and into the air. She was flying.

‘GREAT. Now how do we get to her Coin?” Bit said hopelessly, and Coin could tell that Bit just wanted to go home.

“We do what we can Bit. Come on” Coin said.

As they followed her they found that she swooped down and made her way into an alley, stopping there for several minutes. Bit and Coin were glad she stopped, giving them time to catch up to her, but Bit was glad just to get some down time from this whole chase. Yet, as soon as they recovered she had flown straight up from the alley and was now going twice as fast. Getting around with a less natural method.

“OH COME ON! THAT’S NOT FAIR!” Bit said while trying to keep up with Derpy as she made her way through the city faster than ever.

“Don’t worry Bit, if we lose her we can always follow the trail of muffin mix she leave’s as she goes.” Coin said finally putting some thought into his plan.

“Hey! Finally say something smart Coin! Maybe your actually useful!” Bit said while snickering through the heavy breaths from running, and giving Coin a small grin.

Coin simply made a sharp move to the left, his side running right into Bit’s. Eliciting a small grunt from Bit “Sorry… Sorry… Just kidding Coin…” Bit apologized “FINALLY SHE STOPPED. Here?” he said confused with why they were at a small house “I expected something… Bigger…” he said while watching Derpy walk up to the door and unlocking it.

Coin ignored Bit’s previous statement of judgment “Oh well, we’re here, and that’s what matters. We’re going to take care of business Bit.” he said while making his way up to the house after Derpy had walked in.

“You sure this is a good idea Coin?” Bit said while he was standing in front of the door, awaiting further instruction for coin.

“Positive.” Coin said as he positioned himself in front of the door and turned around. As quickly as he could manage he pushed himself up onto his front hooves and bucked the door, causing it to fall in and straight to the ground.

“Sis! I think someone knocked on the door!” came an innocent voice from within the halls of the house.

“SHE HAS SISTER COIN! WE CAN’T DO THIS!” Bit said quietly, yet shouting at the same time, as his emotions started to take hold of him.

“Doesn’t matter, we’re to far in to stop this now.” Coin stated, trying to talk as little as possible.

“I heard it. I’m checking it right now Din-” Derpy spoke, but froze as she saw the robber staring her straight in the eye. Almost instinctively, Bit ran forwards in an attempt to headset Derpy, which failed miserably when she had punched him and pushed her hoof straight into his body, shooting out muffin mix. Sticking him straight to the wall.

It was difficult for Bit to talk, let alone breath. He used all the strength and energy he could muster up “Help!” he said feebly.

Coin could see that Derpy was focused on Bit at the moment, he knew they were done for, so he ran up to her and pulled his hoof back as far as he possibly could. A loud thud had resonated throughout the room as all went quiet and within a blink of an eye Derpy was on the other side of the room barely on the brink of consciousness.

“Derpy! What’s going on?” Dinky’s worry filled voice sounded through the hall, along with the sound of her hoof steps.

“Great! Look at this! Get me down from here!” sounded Bit as he struggled to get off the wall “HURRY! SHE’S COMING!” he said as the hoof steps were getting louder by the second. As Coin worked at the sticky material restraining Bit he realized that the hoof steps had stopped. He was silent.

A shrill voice had scream throughout the hall as Dinky had walked into the room to see that Derpy was on the floor and two strangers were in her house, not to mention that one of them was restrained to the wall with muffin mix. Yet, through the panic and shaking Coin had been able to free Bit, just in time to.

Derpy had gotten her brain back together and got back up, standing it a attack stance “What are you doing here?” she barked at the intruders.

“Revenge.” Coin said simply.

“For what?! I saved you from that mugging last week! You should be here to thank me!” Derpy said seething with rage.

“You don’t remember also putting me in jail the week before that? That cost me a thousand bits! Not counting bail too!” he argued “So now, I’m going to make you wish you hadn’t stopped me on the street that day. I’m going to stop you. Maybe even kill you. I’m the Confection Killler.” he said trying to intimidate her “This is my partner. The Muffin Murderer.” he said while pointing a hoof towards Bit.

“I TOLD YOU I DIDN’T LIKE THAT NAME” Bit said through the muffin mix, which only came out as a muffled scream, still protesting nonetheless.

“So lets put you in your place! The grave!” Coin said while going into the same attack stance and making a run for Derpy. Yet, the closer he got, the more slower he got, time was slowing down. She had reflex time.

Coin had started to jump and was already a good height into the air and as he peaked at the jump he started to extend a hood, as if trying to punch her. Though, what he didn’t know was that he stood no chance against Derpy, at least with her time being slower than his. By the time he was about to reach her, she had already extended a hoof out and it was right in his face and pushing in with ever second passing.

Derpy had struck him hard. Right in the middle of his face too. He fell straight down to the floor and was slipping out of consciousness “Dinky, watch the other one on the wall. Do something with him… Hmm… I don’t know… Talk to him or something… I’m going to fly this one down to the police station.” she commanded while she hurried in picking up the knocked out criminal.

As she held him in her hooves outside, she knew he would wake up sooner or later and with that thought she wasted no time wrapping the stallion in as much muffin mix as possible. Though, after what seemed like forever, Derpy had finally arrived at the police station “Officer, I found this guy breaking into my house.” she stated while handing the stallion over.

She didn’t mention the other one that she had found.