Cow Chop in Equestria

by Squiggly Cup

Ch 2 - Realities Collide

Previous Chapter

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It was just after they had left Twilight's castle, the girls had all split off to head to their respective homes, some with their new "friends" in tow. Rarity and Aleks had just reached her boutique when Rarity stopped dead in her tracks at the door. Aleks raised an eyebrow at her before she turned around to face him.

"I probably should have mentioned this earlier, but I have a little sister" Rarity stated, much to the confusion of Aleks.

Rarity watched his face and assumed that he didn't understand her meaning, "and she's most likely home by now" she continued.

The gears turned in Aleks head and he realized the slight problem here "Oh, okay I got it. So how exactly do we uh.. introduce me?" Aleks asked.

Rarity raised a hoof to her chin in thought, "hmm, well she is just a filly so she might be scared of you, maybe even run off. Let me go in and talk with her first, and then i'll let you in to meet her. I really do hope she doesn't get scared.." Rarity said as she trotted up to the door and slipped inside, shutting it behind her.

Aleks stood outside anxiously. He noticed that through the lit up windows he could see the two ponies shadowy outlines through the glass. He heard a mumbled talking from inside and saw the smaller pony happily skipping up to Rarity. Aleks waited and listened for a minute of their talking which he couldn't understand from outside. At one point the smaller pony's shadow turned, and it seemed like she was looking towards the window.

As Aleks waited he heard clip clopping noises from behind him, he whipped his head around to see a unicorn walking by with a mint colored coat alongside a pale colored pony with dark blue and purple hair. They chatted happily unaware of the human in the corner of their vision. Aleks acted quick on his toes and dove into a bush in-front of Rarity's home.

The two ponies stopped, "did you hear something?" Lyra asked, glaring at the bushes by Rarity's boutique. "No why?" Bon Bon asked cautiously.

"I swear to Celestia I just saw a human.." Lyra muttered, Bon Bon only rolled her eyes. "Yeah okay... were not doing this again" she sighed, and took Lyra by the hoof to pull her along.

Aleks only sighed in relief when they had left and saw Rarity's door now open as it was basking some of the outdoors in the indoors' light. Rarity's head popped out and looked around, "Um.. Aleks.. are you out here?" she asked.

Aleks climbed up out of the bushes to Rarity's left causing her to jump back a little, "oh my! What were you doing in my bushes?" she asked quizzically.

"Hiding from some ponies walking by" Aleks answered, while watching realization strike Rarity's puzzled expression. "Ah.. yes. We'll have to be careful not to let any random ponies see you or else it might incite some sort of panic" Rarity stated, and while she did so she waved her hoof to welcome Aleks in.

As Aleks stepped into the doorframe Rarity started talking "Now Sweetie Belle, don't be alarmed but.." "Wow! He looks so cool!" Sweetie Belle shouted, immediately rounding in on Aleks. She stepped right up to face him, "wait so are you like an alien then? I heard you suck ponies juices out of them with a straw" Sweetie casually mentioned, while invading Aleks' personal space in the meantime.

Rarity grabbed Sweetie Belle and pulled her back a bit, the embarrassment clear on her face from her sister's antics. "Ha ha... um i'm sorry about that, I honestly wasn't expecting her to be so forward" Rarity explained.

"Nah it's fine, and actually we do suck out ponies juices" Aleks stated, causing Rarity's eyes to go wide in shock, and Sweetie Belle to look even more interested.

"W-wait what? You..." Rarity was dumbfounded until Aleks laughed a little.

"No i'm just kidding" he explained much to the relief of Rarity, and the now boredom of Sweetie Belle.

"Can I show you my room?" Sweetie Belle asked innocently. "Uh.. sure" Aleks responded as he got an approval nod from Rarity while being practically dragged away by this little filly.

"But we sometimes do eat ponies" Aleks muttered as he followed Sweetie Belle down the hall, causing Rarity to look stunned again. "Oh.. uh.. another joke i'm assuming?" she asked, turning to Aleks, but Aleks had already turned the corner with Sweetie Belle. Rarity just nervously laughed after that.

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"Are you fucking kidding me! I am not going over there!" James shouted, causing Fluttershy to wince at his language. James stood just before Fluttershy's little bridge leading to her cottage.

"Oh please... I promise he isn't dangerous" Fluttershy said, as she looked at the bear laying in her yard ahead. He was rolled over onto his back with his limbs stretched out wide, obviously enjoying the sunlight.

"It's a goddamn bear! Me and Aleks have run into a bear before and i'm good with not doing that again" James explained.

Fluttershy simply sighed and fluttered over to the bear to poke him. "I'm sorry Henry but do you think you can go move further over that way, it's just that my new friend here is afraid of you" Fluttershy said. The bear stood up to look at her and roared a few times, Fluttershy nodded each time he did. "Yes I know, but he's had bad experiences with bears. So can you maybe.. um.. just move over there out of the way a little" Fluttershy politely asked, the bear nodded and walked off in the other direction.

James simply stood back slightly amazed that she had just talked to a bear. Fluttershy flew back over to him, gently landing by his side. "Okay he said he'll move"

"Wait a minute, so you ponies can talk to animals?" James asked, which caused Fluttershy to do a double take.

"Oh um.. no.. it's really only something I can do." Fluttershy said.

James just shook his head a little in bewilderment, "oh well, either way it's pretty incredible" he said as he carried on to her cottage. Fluttershy hesitated for a moment, a blush growing on her cheeks from the compliment, but she soon followed after him.

As they entered into the house James hesitated at the sight of all the new animals, Fluttershy noticed this and instinctively put a hoof on his shoulder.

"Sorry I should have told you there were more. Although these ones um.. aren't as big or scary they're just rabbits and squirrels and other little animals.... Harmless little animals" she added at the end when poisonous snakes crossed her mind. "They won't hurt you though"

"Uh alright... this shouldn't be too bad then. I actually had a good experience with a squirrel" James added, Fluttershy smiled again to hear that this person liked animals for the most part.

Losing her usual nervous tone, she asked "Oh really? What was it's name?" she lead James over to her couch as she asked.

James sat down as Fluttershy sat beside him eagerly waiting for an answer.

"Wendy, it was squirrel who came by the house a few times and we fed her peanuts. Although we didn't really see her for a little while after the first few times. Some of my friends actually said they saw a dead squirrel a few weeks later so..." James trailed off awkwardly as he noticed Fluttershy's expression shift from happy to sad.

"Oh.." she sadly mumbled, James could have sworn he saw a few tears building up. They didn't have time to be unleashed though because James was quick on the recovery.

"Anyways! Me and Aleks also both have dogs, his dog's name is Mishka and mine is Ein" James stated happily, which caused Fluttershy's smiled to return in full force.

"Those are very nice names" Fluttershy complimented.

James smiled at her "thanks, yeah it's pretty cool because were able to actually bring them to work with us, and they get to be in videos" he explained.

Fluttershy's curiosity peaked, "They're in videos? What kind of videos do you do?" she asked, surprised at herself that something caught her attention more than animals.

"Uh well it's kinda hard to explain. We usually do videos about us playing video games.. do you guys have video games in this dimension?" James asked.

"Oh uh yes, we have arcades where there are a lot of games. I don't really play them though... i'm not very good at them" she mumbled.

James smiled "that's fine i'm not good at them either, that's the point. People watch us play video games because we joke around and aren't very good at games, but it's mean't to be funny" James explained, Fluttershy nodded, mostly understanding what he mean't.

"Not to sound rude, but do you only do video game videos?" she asked.

"No you're alright, uh... no we do some other stuff too. It's honestly a little weird" James laughed, nervously rubbing the back of his neck. He wasn't sure if talking about the other stuff they've done would be this pony's cup of tea.

"Like just recently we uh... filled a pool up...." his voice trailed off a bit but Fluttershy motioned with her hoof for him to continue. "and uh... we filled it with... with 55 gallons of passion lube.... and played in it.." James finished. Fluttershy blushed at the words "passion lube"

"Oh... oh my... um... it um... sounds like... fun?" but it came off sounding more like a question than a statement.

James chuckled at her nervousness, "no it's fine, we know it's weird, but that's just kinda how comedy works sometimes. Weird stuff is funny" James said, Fluttershy nodded.

"Oh yes, our friend Pinkie Pie is sort of the jokester in our group, and well... she can be a little odd at times too.." Fluttershy said nervously, but tried to make sure it didn't sound like an insult. "Oh but it's very funny!" she quickly added making James laugh.

"Oh don't tell her I called her odd" she said, making James laugh even more. Fluttershy blushed a bit and was hiding behind her pink curtain of hair. Though his laughter helped make her want to peak back out of it. "his laugh is very loud" Fluttershy thought, but she couldn't help but find it infectious nevertheless. Fluttershy giggled a little along with James. As James finished laughing he wiped a few tears out of his eyes and looked to Fluttershy.

"So Fluttershy, you girls all seem to very uh.. "friendship" oriented here, like every things all about smiles and rainbows" James stated, but it was mean't to also act as a question.

"Oh um.. well yes Equestria is sort of known for it. They're are other countries though like where the Griffons live, and they're a little bit more mean over there" Fluttershy stated. "Oh but don't tell them I said that!" she added once again causing James to laugh a bit, but he kept himself under control.

"Yeah well it's really not this nice where i'm from. I mean people are polite and stuff like you and your friends but everythings usually not as peppy and perfect as it seems here" he explained.

"I understand, but things aren't always this happy. Usually they are, but they're have been wars in the past where things haven't been as cheery" Fluttershy explained, for some reason she felt very confident around him. It just seemed really easy to talk to him and speak her mind.

Fluttershy courageously carried the conversation forward, "Do you care for your friends like how we do here?" she asked.

"Uh yeah I mean friendship is friendship anyway you put it I guess. Like Aleks i've known for awhile now and he definitely means a lot to me. We've been through a lot ever since Sly introduced us awhile back. Plus, I mean i'm kind of in a position career wise now where i've achieved most of what I've wanted to do, and now the only thing that really matters to me, legitimately, is to make sure my friends are taken care of" James stated, causing Fluttershy to smile at him.

He can be very sweet, even if he does get a little angry sometimes Fluttershy thought.

"Well that's very nice to hear.... um.. but I should probably go get your guest bedroom setup, excuse me" Fluttershy said as she got up from the couch and walked off to the staircase. As she did James heard her whispering, "I knew he was nice" she mumbled.

James smiled at what she said and relaxed a bit into the couch. Even going as far as to put hit feet up on her coffee table. As he did so a bird swooped down and landed by his feet and started pecking at his new OLLOS brand shoes.

"Ow!" James cried out as he quickly pulled his feet off the table as the bird flew off. Just after that a white rabbit hopped up on the table with a duster and wiped where his feet had been. Afterwards the rabbit turned to him with a quick scowl before bouncing off into another room.

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So there he was, Aleks was sitting down at a dinner table along with Rarity and her filly sister, Sweetie Belle.... two colorful ponies, Aleks honestly didn't know what was happening to his life. He was actually wondering what James was up to right now, and if Fluttershy was any less annoying than this Rarity was, who had already made a big fuss about washing his hands before eating.

Aleks broke out of his stupor when said pony began speaking again. "Darling, it's rude to have your elbows on the dinner table" she said, Aleks simply looked down at his elbows and back up to her with a glare. Rarity wasn't having any of it though, she glared right back at him in return. Aleks wasn't sure how it was happening but this unicorn actually had a pretty scary glare when she needed to, so he slowly and reluctantly lowered his elbows off the table. Rarity then smiled and went back to her salad with a triumphant hmph noise.

As Rarity focused on her food Aleks noticed the filly out of the corner of his eye. As he turned to look at her she gave him an awkward shrug of the shoulders with a slightly scrunched up face as a way of saying "yeah sorry, that's just kinda how she is...

Aleks smiled at her and she couldn't help but giggle a little. Rarity's head snapped up towards Sweetie Belle "and what's so funny about elbows on the table missy?" she asked in a stern, almost military sounding voice which Sweetie Belle picked up on.

"Nothing, nothing at all commander Rarity!" Sweetie Belle responded formally, along with giving a military salute along with it. Aleks burst out into laughter and Sweetie Belle even began laughing along with him. Rarity scowled at her sister as she was able to bond so easily with this hooligan.

"Ha ha, yes very funny. Speaking of funny things, I have to insist that you take a shower after dinner" Rarity said.

"Why's that funny?" Aleks asked

"Because based on what my nostrils are telling me I feel as those you haven't showered in months" Rarity stated with a laugh, only to receive a mean glare from Aleks.

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After dinner was over and plates were washed, Sweetie Belle led Aleks upstairs into their bathroom. "So if I were you and I wanted to live, I would avoid using any of Rarity's fancy shampoos and conditioners. I would just stick to the water and that soap right there" Sweetie Belle explained she pointed towards a pink bar of soap.

"Alright, that's fine. Oh and thanks Sweetie Belle, you've been a lot more polite then you're sister so far" Aleks said as he went over to the shower.

"It's no problem, but to be fair my sister is actually really nice. She actually represents the element of kindness believe it or not" Sweetie Belle explained.

"Yeah well i'm gonna choose not to believe that" Aleks countered while he turned the shower's knob to let the water run. Sweetie giggled a little at the remark.

"Trust me, once she knows you better and trusts you more her element will stand out much clearer. Although yeah, she can be kind of annoying when it comes to keeping perfectly clean at all times, and looking as perfect as a model 24/7" Sweetie Belle added, this time making Aleks laugh a bit.

"Yeah she seems like a pain the ass with that stuff" he said.

"I heard that! and i'd rather you not use that sort of language around my LITTLE sister!" Rarity yelled from downstairs.

Sweetie Belle then walked up to Aleks so she could talk a little quieter, "It's fine trust me, me and my friends have heard worse while were out crusading, just don't tell Rarity" she said, and finished off with a wink before turning and exiting the bathroom.

As Aleks went to take off his clothes for the shower he looked again at Rarity's fancy bottles of shampoo. A very sick and twisted idea popped into his brain, one that he was sure James would be proud of once he found out about it.