The Riddleby silverspawnChaptersChapter 7Chapter 8Chapter 9Chapter 10Chapter 11Chapter 13Chapter 14Chapter 15Chapter 16Chapter 17Chapter 18Chapter 19Chapter 20Chapter 22Chapter 24Chapter 25Chapter 26Chapter 27Chapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 5Chapter 6Chapter 12Chapter 21Chapter 23Chapter 28Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 7The information in the remaining books had been even more sparse. The History of Canterlot portrayed phoenixes as a creature of wonder, and “owning” one as as the penultimate symbol of status. (Twilight had taken the book out of the library’s catalog after her read; surely there were other books that did a better job in re-telling the history of the world’s capital, and she had already written a letter to the Royal Library, asking them to send one.) The Magic in Nature: A force through the ages reallyought to have at least a section about them, but Twilight had been disappointed. The book had merely noted that little was known, and that many of their powers “remained unexplained”. Both of those things were definitively true, but it was also unhelpful, and odd considering the fairly detailed information that the book provided about many other species. Perhaps that circumstance was by itself important. It did, however, have one piece of information that did seem to carry relevance, which was an observation of how phoenixes seemed to “rarely be affected” by tragedies that had befallen other species, ponies included. And lastly, Greed and Deception: The role of Money in the Griffon culture had been an excellent and highly interesting read that sadly didn’t mention phoenixes at all, but was still something she’d recommend to anyone who wanted to learn about Griffons. Twilight sighed as she looked over the page whereon she had just written every noticeable find. It was a depressingly short list. And if the incident with Philomena had not taken place, then her conclusions now would look radically different, which was not a good sign for their reliability. Perhaps... Was this the wrong approach? No, that was silly. Obviously, reading about them first was the correct approach. But was it time to change it up with something else? She was beginning to think of phoenixes more and more as a riddle, and you didn’t solve a riddle by reading. You solved a riddle by thinking. For which you needed to be smart... ... or, perhaps... Sometimes, riddles were not solved by the smartest ponies, and sometimes, the same pony would be stuck on a riddle on one day, but be able to solve it on the next. A big factor was variance, or, to put it more bluntly, luck. Perhaps, if she just asked somepony else, that pony would know the solution immediately. Chapter 8“Twilight.” Rarity held the door to the boutique open, giving Twilight a curious glance. “What brings you here?” “Hey. Uhm... I need your help with something.” Rarity raised an eyebrow, maybe expecting her to elaborate, but then just shrugged and stepped aside. “Of course. Come in.” Twilight nodded. “I tried to reach you yesterday,” she said, closing the door behind her, “but you weren’t home.” “Ah, yes. I was out.” “Out?” “At a bar. Do you want tea?” “I...” Twilight produced a small box. “... brought some, actually.” She floated it over. “You want to try?” “Certainly.” Rarity took the box in her telekinesis, turning it around. “Seventy degrees, two and a half minutes, one tablespoon per cup,” Twilight instructed. Rarity nodded, and began to put on water. “This is delicious.” “Thanks.” “This, ah.” Rarity took another sip. “This might be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” “It probably is the best thing I’ve ever tasted,” Twilight said truthfully. “It’s a shame that I don’t have more.” “How-” “From Zecora. I helped her with a really tricky spell a couple of weeks ago. She said this was from her homeland, and that she didn’t have a lot of it left herself.” “I see. A rare gift, then. Do you know what it is?” “Only that half of it is ordinary Sencha. The rest, Zecora said it’s a secret. But even if we knew, I don’t think the plants would grow around here.” “A shame.” Rarity brought the cup to her lips once more, closing her eyes at the taste. “Mhhhh... heavenly. Well then.” She put it back down. “With such a wonderful gift, you have earned my full attention. How can I help you?” “Well...” And Twilight told her everything that had led up to this point, starting with her initial letter. She had almost forgotten that Rarity had helped rescuing the egg in the first place, so the fact that she even had this opportunity was partially her doing. When she was done, she asked if Rarity saw something obvious she had missed, either something about phoenixes themselves, or just something she could do to find out more. Rarity made a number of remarks that made sense, but were all things she had already thought of herself. In the end, she had to concede that there probably was no obvious solution. “I’m sorry,” Rarity offered, but Twilight shook her head. “Don’t be. I don’t even know if there is an answer, or if can be inferred from what I know.” “I see. If I may ask, why did you come to me with this?” “Uhm...” Twilight shrugged. “You’re smart. And it’s pretty common that sometimes you just don’t see things yourself, even if they’re right there.” “Well... I guess I’m not that smart, then, if I didn’t come up with anything new.” “You said a lot of what I came up with.” Twilight frowned, a spark of her horn causing a flat paper to materialize on the table between them. “Anchoring spell,” she explained at the questioning look she received from Rarity. “I learned it a while ago, it lets me enchant objects so I can recall them from anywhere. I do it to keep easy access to important documents. And here...” Her eyes darted across the list. “Yeah, you covered most of this.” “Still, why me? Fluttershy is the one who actually took care of a phoenix, and Pinkie would be my first address to finding things that nopony else is seeing. And what about Spike?” “I already asked Spike.” Twilight drank the rest of her tea, the taste lifting up her mood. “But you have a point. I’ll ask them, too.” Rarity nodded. “And do pressure the princess a bit more. This isn’t the right time to be mysterious, she should just tell you everything she knows.” “...” “What?” Twilight was flabbergasted. “You... you’re questioning the princess’ judgment!” “Oh. I suppose I am, indeed.” “She’s hundreds of years old! Hundreds of years of experience, maybe even longer-” “Well, but so is Luna.” Twilight opened her mouth, but closed it without saying anything. Rarity’s remark had beaten her speechless. “Well,” she said at last, “I guess that’s one thing I hadn’t thought of myself.” “Oh. You’re welcome.” Twilight giggled. “Alright.” She stood up. “I guess I won’t bother you further. Oh and, do you want some of my mysterious super-delicious tea as a reward?” Rarity’s face lit up. “That would be marvelous.” Twilight nodded, and Rarity followed her into the kitchen. “I’ll make sure to save it for special occasions.” Chapter 9It had seemed like such a good idea. Such a smart thing to do. Such a sensible, safe way to conduct her research. But neither Pinkie nor Fluttershy had been able to help. Chapter 10Twilight stood still, staring blankly out the window above her desk. It was now eleven days after the start of her project, and their weekly picnic was due tomorrow. It was also the twenty-fourth of May, not that that was particularly important, and her research so far hadn’t been a success. She was about halfway through the books she had wanted to read, and though she was still motivated enough to finish them all, she was not optimistic enough anymore to believe that it would advance her cause in the way she had hoped. Peewee had grown to become a familiar sight, but his presence in her home was less informative than one would think. If she were to consider him an animal, then she’d conclude that he was extraordinarily intelligent. He would leave her in peace when she was busy, and come to her during breaks if he wanted something, usually food. He would communicate his taste by taking or rejecting different dishes she offered, and his tastes even seemed to change based on his mood. He liked to take flights around the library, but rarely ever disappeared out of sight, and he had never made any attempts to leave. He did, however, not appear to understand her, at least not yet. A few times, Twilight had carefully tried to ask him something, and it had not felt like she was talking to an equal, not even provided that equal didn’t understand her language. It had felt like talking to an animal. The most fascinating thing to observe had been what Twilight assumed was his metabolism. Rather than ejecting parts of the food he ate in physical form – like less graceful creatures tended to do – he would hover in the air, and erupt a shower of orange sparks to slowly fall onto the ground. Twilight could only guess that, with time, they would somehow be decomposed into earth or something. It was notable that he always did this outside, at least that was how it had been the two times she had observed. So... it appeared that he somehow had an intuitive grasp on the the pony concept of tidiness (even though what he did hardly even seemed to be unhygienic), but was not intelligent enough to understand what she was trying to say when she had asked him if he wanted to accompany her to their picnic a week ago... or, when she had asked him if he wanted to be brought back to his parents... Other ponies in town had of course noticed his existence, an unavoidable circumstance if his home was a public library, and Twilight was pretty sure, even, that more ponies than usual had come to the library in recent days, probably just to get a glimpse at him. Even in a town that lay next to a forest full of mystical creatures, a phoenix still seemed to be an attraction. Not that Twilight could blame them. If it was her, she was pretty sure she would have visited the library only to... well, no, that wasn’t true, she would never be able to visit a library and only care about something other than the books. But she would probably want to see him. Even now, that he was around all the time, his mere sight had never stopped being special. There was something inimitably pure and beautiful about a phoenix, something that no other creature could really compare with... But that was hardly a scientific fact to write down. She could try to interact with him a bit more... maybe perform some kind of experiment... but she didn’t want to treat him as an object, or even as a pet; she wanted to treat him as a guest. And you didn’t just perform scientific experiments on a guest without his consent. Maybe she should ask? But how would she know if he really agreed? Or maybe she should- Chapter 11-write all this down. Twilight pulled up an empty sheet and put her quill at the top of the page. Things I can do next: – Ask the princess for more detailed information – Try to get Peewee’s consent for a few experiments. Otherwise, try it until he shows signs of rejection – Ask Spike to tell me exactly what he has seen Peewee do At this point, Twilight had to admit that she was already getting desperate. Asking Spike was unlikely to lead to any new insights; if he had seen something extraordinary, he would have told her. After a while of thinking, Twilight gave a barely audible sigh and added a fourth point. – Set up safety measures, try to poke at his mind That would not be safe, measures or not. But so what? It seemed clear, at this point, that staying safe wasn’t working. It was not working. As much as she wanted it to, it just wasn’t working... Before she could put the connection into conscious thoughts, she wrote down a fifth point. – Try to bring Peewee back to his parents. See if he wants to leave This was not unlikely to kill her experiments, setting her far back. But... It was wrong to keep him around if he didn’t really want to be here... Twilight felt frustration dwelling up inside her. She still believed that he was intelligent enough to make that choice, even though it had not shown. Why did she believe that? Why... With a renewed sense of determination, Twilight made a checkmark beside the first point, then she grabbed another letter. Chapter 13Dear Twilight, the issue I am facing is complicated, and not easily explained. I assume you believe me to have well-reasoned motives for most of what I do, and that I don’t struggle with decisions such as what I should or should not keep a secret. Such is a fair guess, and true more often than not. But this is different. You know I am neither omnipotent nor infallible. I repeat this now to prepare you for what I have decided to explain. I hope it is not too much of a shock to you regardless. Over the past millennia, Luna and I have tried our best to gradually improve the world that we live in. Life today is better than it was a hundred years ago, if not by much, and life then was better than it was another hundred years prior – if not by much – and so on. The better things become, the more afraid we have been of change, and the more cautious we have been in applying improvements. Phoenixes scare me. My memory is blurry, I do not recall the past as well as you do, but I believe I have always done my best to avoid making them my enemies. If something happened to me, Twilight, so many lives would be affected. I cannot risk it. I cannot risk anything. I keep Philomena by my side, not as a way to keep an eye on her, but to allow her to keep an eye on me. Because if what I believe is true, then the individuality that we have among ponies does not apply in the same way to phoenixes. Information which one has might somehow be available to others. You are asking me to share what I know. I know very little. I only have observations, questions, and uncertainties, and I see very little consistency. Are they intelligent, or are they not? I have seen reality point in both directions. Twilight, Philomena is here, reading the letter, or perhaps reading my mind, or perhaps sitting on my shoulder because it is comfortable. I have shown her everything I have written to you on this subject. I do not believe she wants me to continue. I shall see if she minds me sending this to you. Do what you believe is best. They will not hurt you for trying, not by will. in Love, Princess Celestia Chapter 14Twilight felt a lump in her throat as the trotted further away from Ponyville, the town now at the edge of her vision whenever she turned her head to look. Yesterday, Peewee had come with her to the picnic, and now, he had had come with her again, possibly for the last time. A little voice in her head told her that she was unlikely to find his parents. A little voice in her head told her that, if she tried but failed, she might just have to bring him back home. A little voice in her head was silenced and ignored. If she didn’t find his parents today, then she’d try again another time. Twilight was unsure if she did this because she wanted to do what was best for him, or because she was afraid of what she would try if he stayed with her. Somehow, this had become the compromise, her way to ask for consent. She would offer him to return, and only proceed if he chose to stay. She turned her head around again, and could not see Ponyville anymore. The road to the Badlands was long, around the entirety of the Everfree forest and further, but time was not an issue. Plus, if Peewee was going to leave, then the way home would be a lot easier... But then, the weight on her back disappeared. Twilight turned around to see Peewee flapping his wings, staring into the direction from which they had come. Seconds passed, during which Twilight was at a loss for things to do. A shiver ran down her spine as the phoenix turned around, watching her with an untypical expression. It was almost as if he was tilting his head... Are they intelligent, or are they not? I have seen reality point into both directions. Did he know? Die he understand where she was trying to lead him, even so early on? “Do you want to go home?” No reaction. “I can bring you back to your parents.” The phoenix blinked. “I...” The words got stuck in her throat as he flew towards her, landing on top of her shoulder, and leaning his head against hers. His touch was hot, almost painfully so, and more so than usually. Was he saying goodbye? Would he not need her to come with him? Was this the last time that she- But he was not. He flew back upwards, fixating his gaze onto where Ponyville had been. She could not see it anymore, but maybe he could? Then, he made an unmistakable gesture with his head. “You want to stay?” As an answer, the phoenix flapped his wings, slowly flying the way back. A sense of euphoria took over Twilight as she followed, quickly being forced into a canter as he accelerated his flight. “Hey. Hey!” Peewee turned his head mid flight, letting out a strange cry, only to go even faster. A smile spread across Twilight’s face as she galloped after him, soon evolving into a laugh as they raced each other... heading back home. Author's Note Future Chapters are going to be longer – still not long, but more like normal length than what’s been presented so far. The first fourteen chapters are sort of an extended prologue, in my mind, that happened to fit naturally into tiny chunks, but now as things will begin to get real, that will change. This is as far as the story has/had been published by the point of submission. Chapter 15Generally, Twilight liked to keep promises she made, including those made to herself. And while the decision at hoof hadn’t technically been one, she nonetheless felt a similar amount of devotion to her choice, probably due to her having used the phoenix’ potential departure as a chance to avoid taking action. Well, that chance had not come to be, so action would be taken. She had contacted Rarity, and had asked her to bring a friend capable to provide what she needed. Twilight did her best to calm her nerves as she pulled open the door to greet her visitors, one of whom being Rarity, the other a pink unicorn mare with a purple and lavender mane, a mare whom she recognized after a second’s thought. “Amethyst Star.” “Hey, you remember me.” “Yeah. You’re head of the Animal Department.” The recipient shook her head. “That’s gone to Fluttershy now. Makes lots more sense that way.” Twilight nodded, stepping aside to let both of them in. “From what I’ve heard, you’re the only pony Rarity could think of that knows how to cast a type B shield.” “Well,” said Rarity, “most of my acquaintances aren’t magicians.” Twilight nodded again. “How did you learn it?” “Studied it myself. Thought it’d be useful. Ponyville’s been pretty dangerous lately.” “That’s great.” Self-study generally indicated a higher degree of understanding, and, consequently, of skill. “I’ll need you to use it on me – just the normal version – for at most a minute. Uhm.” She gave herself a push, deciding to get the uncomfortable out of the way as quickly as possible. “Do you want to get paid for this?” “I’m good. Thanks, though.” “Alright.” Not a complicated mare, it seemed. “Okay. Do you know about the phoenix?” The pink mare bowed her head. “Great. I’m running an experiment where I’ll try to get a peek at his thoughts. I probably won’t need any protection, but I’m not... sure, and a bit of extra security can’t hurt. Should we get right to it?” Both of them voiced their agreement, and Twilight led the way upstairs. “This... isn’t really a secret,” she said carefully, “but I’d still prefer it if you didn’t go around telling everypony. Alright.” She approached the small, wooden table in the center of the room, the same table that usually stood in the entrance hall. On top of it rested the phoenix, sitting still, almost attentively. “So, I will stand right... here, and you can choose whichever position you like best, just make sure you have good aim. And Rarity, could you stand beside me?” “As you wish.” Rarity stepped next to her. “Twilight, this is not going to be dangerous, is it?” “It is a bit dangerous,” Twilight responded truthfully, “otherwise I wouldn’t have asked you two. But only for me.” “Only for you?” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “You will forgive me if I don’t find that reassuring.” “I... well, there are some risks, but I...” She didn’t look the fashionista in the eyes as she said this, and a part of her felt doubts dwelling up, but they were only more, more of the same. She had already put them behind her. “I thought about this for a long time, and I decided that I want to try.” A pause. “Okay?” “Well...” Rarity shrugged. “It is your call, I suppose, if you...” A frown crossed her face. “Hold on...” She shook her head. “No, what am I saying. This is not right.” And before she could see it coming, Rarity had extended a hoof to her chin, raising her head so that Twilight could no longer avoid her gaze. “Twilight. This is really dangerous, isn’t it? Not as in, somepony might get hurt, but worse. Tell me the truth.” Twilight’s first reaction was frustration. She had intended to skip all this. To simply do the experiment, proof that it was safe, and then talk about it, at which point no-one would be that upset anymore. How had Rarity found out? What had given her away? Why... But once she realized what she was thinking, she felt regret dwelling up inside her, and even a bit of shame. This was not like her. Hiding information from her friends to prevent them from questioning her decisions, that was not what she was about. Stifling a sigh, she forced herself to give the honest answer. “Okay, yes. Theoretically, there is a chance that it could kill me.” “Then why,” said Rarity in a slow tone, “do you want to do it?” “Because lots of things can theoretically kill us, Rarity, and we do them anyway, like me visiting Zecora, or like AJ doing deliveries halfway across Equestria, or Fluttershy taking care of frogs in Froggy Bottom Bog. And this is important, and the risk is really small.” “How small?” “I don’t know. One percent? Probably less-” “Darling. Darling. Darling!” Rarity seemed genuinely upset. “One percent is not a tiny number when it comes to your survival! I have no doubts that you are better at math than I am, but if you risked a one percent chance of death once a week when visiting Zecora, you would last, what, two years? This is your life, Twilight! I would not take that chance even if made me a star in Canterlot this very instant!” “If families take their kids to the mountains on vacation,” Twilight held against her, “then there’s statistically also a one percent chance that somepony dies over the course of a decade. They might not think about it like I am, but they still are making that judgment, by deciding that the fun they have is worth the risk. Well, I’m doing the same. Consider it a compensation for the last ten summer vacations I skipped.” For a few moments, Rarity watched her as if she had lost her mind, and Twilight began to wonder if she was about to declare her crazy, but then- “You are not wrong, I suppose. But... well, for one, is that a real number?” Twilight nodded. “One percent over ten vacations of one family?” Twilight nodded. “A family would have more than one member.” “Oh.” Twilight bit her lip at the realization of having missed the obvious, swallowing. It was true, and somehow, it mattered to her. She had not thought it through before, a fact that she now felt ashamed of, and her own argument had sounded convincing to her. Not that it made any real difference, of course; how it compared to other risks didn’t actually matter for her situation, but... “Uhm. Thirty vacations?” “And is this really worth that risk?” Twilight lowered her gaze at that. Licking her lips, she did her best to genuinely reconsider. She didn’t have to do this. She really didn’t. She could just give up and- ... no! No, no, no, and no! This was too important to her, and it would haunt her for too long if she just abandoned it. She nodded, whereupon Rarity scoffed in frustration, clearly not having received the answer she had hoped for. “Fine. I will not question your judgment, but Twilight, if you’re doing this, you owe it to everyone to set up a proper last will first.” That hit her like a strike in the face. “Excuse me?” “Yes? I am not trying to complicate this for you, but if you are risking your life, then-” “I am not going to die, Rarity, it is a tiny chance!” “Make a shortened version, then. At least provide some instructions for all the questions which will come up in case of the worst outcome.” Her voice was calm, and Twilight couldn’t sense any trace of sarcasm or dishonesty. “You are a utilitarian, aren’t you? Ignoring the danger can hardly be the right course. Ah, and tell the other girls before you go through with this.” Twilight’s blood was boiling. There was something incredibly humiliating about being told to compose a last will, if it was almost certainly not going to be your last will, and the fact that Rarity seemed to be genuine about it, not just trying to make her reconsider, only made it worse. Nonetheless... to put it in the fashionista’s words... she was not wrong... and Twilight had already made enough mistakes for one day to insist on her position, so... “Fine.” Rarity nodded. “We shall come back at another date.” At the word ‘we’, Twilight turned towards the pink pony with a wince, whose presence she had forgotten about entirely throughout the debate. “Listen, I’m-” “No need to apologize. What you discussed sounded important enough.” Twilight nodded numbly. “Alright.” Amethyst’s eyes hung on Peewee for a moment, who didn’t show any signs of having understood the conversation, then she turned away with a shrug. “See you then.” “Yeah... bye.” Twilight sighed, too frustrated to even escort her guests back to the door as they headed downstairs. Ugh. Chapter 16Twilight didn’t know if Rarity had expected her to change her mind over the course of the week, but if she had, then such had not come to be. Twilight had reconsidered, she truly had, but she had arrived at the same conclusion, be it for different reasons. If phoenixes really were intelligent, and if nopony had studied them before – and everything she had learned so far seemed to point in that direction – then, then she was about to dive into a whole new realm of unexplored potential, potential that went beyond just scientific discoveries. It was worth the risk. And yet, sometimes, Twilight still found herself struck by a sudden rush of fear, and she imagined what would happen if she was wrong, if she really... this was probably the true reason why she had wanted to act so hastily, to avoid this fear... once, she had broken into sweat at the thought, and almost given into panic. Within those moments, she had expected herself to change her mind once it was over, but she had not. One percent, so she had told herself, that was almost as unlikely as a die rolling six and six again and then five or six. Somehow, thinking of it like that had make her feel a tiny bit better. The other four had all offered to be there when she tried, but Twilight had declined. Having other magical creatures present not only wouldn’t be helpful; it could actually be dangerous. Unforeseen magic bursts could trigger avalanche effects, which was why she hadn’t even bothered asking the princess for help. Pinkie Pie in particular was a wildcard, and although one of the others would be unlikely to make the difference – why take the risk? Amethyst was there for the shield, and Rarity was there to provide moral support if, somehow, she was being attacked psychologically. Including anyone else would not be smart. And so, nine days after her first attempt, the three of them stood at almost identical positions on the library floor, and Twilight still felt afraid. Rarity who, at their latest meeting, had pulled her aside to put her conviction on trial one more time, was now standing beside her, their gazes locked. Twilight could see no chagrin in her gaze, only open worry, and perhaps a reflection of her own fear. “Don’t die.” Twilight nodded. “I won’t.” Rarity drew her into a hug. She gave her a squeeze before she let go, taking a step away, but leaving a hoof resting on her shoulder. “You’re ready?” she heard Amethyst say. She nodded, and moments later she could feel the signs of a spell on the magical plane, seconds before its effects became visible. The shield was purple, a lighter version of her own. Her heart pounded as she finally did it, hesitating no longer so as not to risk the shield decreasing in power. Her senses exited her mind, reaching out for the phoenix who was once more sitting still, almost as if he understood that something was happening. Gradually, Twilight made herself familiar with the texture of his being, holding her breath for just another moment as she crossed the line into the realms of his mind. Without warning, without reason, a crushing wave of pain assaulted her, sending her screaming out in shock and panic. She retreated her senses as fast as she could, taking a few moments to realize that Rarity was holding her head between her hooves, shouting her name. “Twilight! Twilight!” “I’m okay.” Breathlessly, Twilight threw a confused look around, realizing that she had collapsed. She stood back up. The pain had vanished the same moment her tie to the phoenix’ mind had snapped. Moreover, it had left no trace; not in her body, nor in her mind. It was only the shock that had made her fall, and the panic in that one moment when she had thought it all a horrible mistake. But it was fine. She was fine. Well, at least she was still alive, and that was good news. Her fear had been injury, potentially fatal injury, and while the result certainly hadn’t been what she had hoped for, it also hadn’t been what she had feared. She told Amethyst to put out her shield, then explained what had happened as well as she could. Rarity looked relieved, and Twilight actually felt flattered by the amount of empathy she showed. “At least you are not, ah, injured. I suppose you did get hurt.” Rarity shook her head. “Please tell me you aren’t going to try again.” “I can’t.” Rarity gave a sad sigh. “It’s less dangerous than it was on our first try. I did it, and whatever has caused the pain hasn’t injured me. It makes no sense to stop now.” The fashionista said nothing at that. “You need the shield again?” Amethyst asked. “Good heavens!” Rarity’s head spun around, giving both other unicorns a stern glare. “We aren’t going to try right now. Take a break, Twilight. You can give it another shot once we have all calmed down.” Her gaze drilled into hers, and Twilight nodded hastily. There was no reason to rush things. What followed were twenty minutes of time spent downstairs. Twilight made tea for them all (a more commonly used mixture of Matcha and ginger), and Rarity did a serviceable job of introducing conversation. But even though there was no tension between them, and even though Amethyst turned out to be quite an affable mare, Twilight’s heart was simply not in it. Her thoughts only revolved around one thing, and soon they found themselves in front of the table once more, about to run the experiment a second time. The shield was up, even though Twilight began to suspect that it would be of little use, and Rarity stood beside her. When she dove into the phoenix’ mind, the result was the same as on the previous try. It hurt. It hurt a lot. But it wasn’t injuring her. Twilight took the pain in, observing the situation apprehensively, and with surprising calm. The pain was not in her head, nor in her horn. Instead, it seemed to be close to her breast, somewhere... and it was neither a stitching nor a squeezing kind of feeling, nor did it burn or, really, feel like anything she had experienced before. It was just pain, pain with no apparent cause or reason. Twilight could feel no magic coming from the phoenix, no traces of a spell that was causing this. Was she just imagining it? But... She squeezed her eyes, groaning quietly, and then did the only sensible thing in pulling back. Once again, the pain evaporated into nothingness the moment that she lost touch with the phoenix’ mind, and Twilight took a few seconds to relish in its absence. As soon as the pleasant feeling of not being tormented by an invisible force seized to console her, however, she felt a quickly growing sense of frustration. What. This didn’t make sense. At all. It made no sense. None. She would be forced to repeat the process. There was no way she could back down now that she had all the more reason to assume that it wasn’t really dangerous. But what kind of research would this be, that made her suffer so much? And what would happen if she wasn’t going to find out more? That would be the most disappointing project she had ever undertaken, and the the most unpleasant one to boot. “And...?” Twilight shook her head. “Same result,” she said, realizing the harshness in her voice only after the words were spoken. “I’m sorry,” she added in a friendlier tone, “I mean, I got the result again. It hurt a lot, somewhere in my breast, but I don’t even know why, and as soon as I pulled back, it stopped. I mean, you’d think there’d be some kind of aftermath, but it’s just gone.” “Sorry about that. I didn’t feel anything, so I assume my shield was pretty useless?” Twilight nodded. “I didn’t even sense any magic. Whatever is doing this, it doesn’t seem to care at all about spells. I’m sorry.” Amethyst Star shrugged, seemingly unbothered. “No worries. You said from the beginning that it probably wouldn’t make a difference. Wouldn’t be science if we already knew it worked.” “No...” Twilight agreed with a sad sigh. “It wouldn’t.” Later that evening, Twilight tried for a third time. Since the only tradeoff was her enduring temporary pain, so she had rationalized, it was smarter to act now, while she was filled with a strange sense of determinism fueled by her frustration, than to think more about it, try to decide whether it was worth it, conclude that it was, and do it later. As soon as she touched his mind, pain ignited inside her breast. This time, Twilight could locate it easily. It was contained, it was predictable, and it hurt like fire. And she had understood something else, too. The reason why she was able to endure this, even willingly, was the particular nature of the pain. If you hit your head, broke your leg, or had caries, then it wasn’t just the pain which was unpleasant, it was the feeling of that particular part of your body being injured. Pain was inherently tied to injury, it was why it existed in the first place, as a way for your body to send warning signals. But now, as Twilight continued trying to understand the pulsating source inside her breast, that was not so. There was no part of her body that felt injured, no feeling signaling that the pain was bad for her, no negative feedback save for the pain itself. And this must have been, must have been the reason why she had been able to endure this for as long as she had already, because, because if she had been asked, after the first time, then there was no way she would, would ever have guessed a time of, of, how long had it been already, two minutes? Two minutes of a pain this strong? It was not enough to stop, stop it from being bad, from being negative. But it was, was a large, was a large difference. And maybe, just maybe, maybe it would, would be possible, possible for her to stop sensing, to stop sensing it as negative; maybe... Twilight realized that her thoughts were getting slower. Considering the pain as merely an occurrence and not as horrible was slowly seizing to work. It was overwhelming her, just as it had last time, only this time it had taken it longer. With a sigh, Twilight pulled back. Once more, the pain vanished immediately, leaving nothing behind, just like the last two times... and the time before that, where she had been so thoughtless, and had needed Rarity to nudge her into the right direction, when she had made a mistake, acted irresponsibly... Err, what? What had been then? She had lost her train of thought. Well, it was obvious that she was in an exhausted mental condition. Managing a smile, she felt for a box of nuts, putting a few on the table in front of Peewee, whose position on the table had remained unchanged. It was important to signal to him that she wasn’t blaming him for anything, because if there was one thing she was sure of, it was that this was not his doing, least not voluntarily. It had been her decision to force this clash of natures, and the results were her burden to bear. Peewee gave an eager flap of his wings at the sight of the four cobs Twilight had produced, so she cracked them open with her telekinesis, one at a time, offering him their tasty interiors. She watched him eat, feeling her tiredness increasing as she did so, even though it was still had to be at least four hours ‘till midnight... Amethyst Star had been nice, and looking back on it, she found herself glad that she wasn’t holding any grudge against her. Not that she had actually done something wrong... getting a pony to do the shield had surely been the smart thing to do, there was no doubt. It was when she had wanted to do it the first time that she hadn’t been smart; rather ruthless, really, irresponsible towards the other girls, and everypony else she knew, for that matter... “You want some more?” Peewee was finished with the four nuts she had provided, each one swallowed in a single bite. As expected, he showed no reaction to her question, so she just produced another four. “You’ll have to answer for all this,” she muttered absently while cracking them, “if I end up finding out that you’re actually intelligent and understand every word I’m saying.” It took only two seconds after her glow had faded around the final nut that his spout came shooting down, picking up the first. “But I suppose you there’s no chance you really do, is there? Why should you? Even if you are smarter than us, there’s still no way that you would understand my language. Which makes it so strange that Celestia thought Philomena might have been reading her letter...” Her voice trailed off. “Maybe you don’t understand what I’m saying, but you infer everything by reading my thoughts? Is that how it works? Can you interpret them, but only as long as I don’t think in words? Is that why you didn’t fly around while I was experimenting? Or why you came back home with me? Or why you go out when you...” She frowned. “I don’t know if I ever actually wanted for you to go out for that, though. Or did I?” She wasn’t sure. She didn’t remember. As she thought back on it, she noticed that her thoughts kept drifting away, thinking about bigger things... how she should be glad that she was still alive. Maybe she should stop Pinkie before she threw a Twilight-is-not-dead-party, because, surely, that would be a terrible idea, she had no intention of others knowing about this, ponies had a tendency to be irrational when it came to touchy subjects... she herself was not excluded from that, just affected a bit less strongly... And she thought again about how she had been so ruthless, been so stupid. It was not good to be stupid. That was sort of the number one rule as a magician: don’t do anything stupid, it might get you killed. It only applied for those who were powerful enough to seriously harm themselves, which weren’t many, but she was among them. If she wasn’t careful, then there were no limits to the harm a failed spell could do to her... and to others. She didn’t even need a phoenix for that. But there was a simple rule to eliminate such risk, which was that, if you weren’t sure whether something was the right course, you simply delayed it until you were. Which was something she should know better than breaking, but which she had broken nine days ago... Her eyes flickered onto the table. Seven of the eight nuts were gone, but the final one still lay inside its broken shell. With a frown, Twilight lifted it up at eye’s height, wondering if there was something wrong with it, but she failed see what it would be. “Not hungry anymore?” With a shrug, she ate it herself. “Passing up just one nut? That’s a strange behavior for an animal.” Peewee gave a quiet chirp at that, as if laughing at a joke she had made. Chapter 17Twilight had vivid dreams that night. Their remains trickled out of her memory like water into the earth when she woke up, too elusive for her to hold them back. Soon all that remained were fractions, leaving her vaguely disappointed and with a feeling as if she had just lost something. Applejack had appeared in them, or in one, and a large building, somewhere, and they had meant to escape, but so many other things had been there, too, and she was unlikely to ever find out what those had been; they would gradually slide into oblivion, just like so many memories before. With a sigh, she groggily slid out of bed, teetering towards the stairs, rubbing her eyes as she did so. What she now needed was tea... preferably black... and then... The sinking feeling lessened, and a sense of excitement rose up in her as she remembered the hypothesis she had come up with on the day before. What if... Peewee did not understand her on an intellectual level, but was able to read her emotions intuitively? That warranted a test, right after breakfast. I’d like you to fly to me, and sit on my shoulder. Twilight watched Peewee finishing his hay fries with a frown. It was an unintuitive sight for a phoenix to be eating fries, however, he really seemed to like it. She had offered him an apple before (directly from Applejack’s farm, and cut into small, edible pieces), which he had rejected, even though he had eaten one just a few days ago. Right now, though, his diet was secondary. What mattered was whether her thesis was correct, and as of now... I want you to come here, and sit on my shoulder. She should probably have a consistent wording. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. The last stem disappeared in his spout, and Peewee gave what Twilight assumed to be a satisfied cry. He pivoted his head around, as if deciding what he wanted to do next. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. Peewee flapped his wings... Yes! I want you to come and sit on my- ... and flew outside the window. Tartarus. Well. It was too early to discard her hypothesis just yet, but it really had not seemed as if he had even registered that she was trying to communicate with him. It did not look good. Absently, Twilight floated the bowl with the blended apple towards her, chewing on the pieces one at a time. They were no less delicious than normally. Twilight had tried to put her mind into other things for the time being, at least until Peewee was tired of flying around and returned to the library. Sadly, even though all she had wanted to do was to slide into her usual routine, it had somehow been more difficult than normal, just because she had a more important goal on her mind. Silly, given that said goal had no good reason to interfere now, but not an uncommon occurrence. Actually, there was probably a name for that phenomenon. She should look into that some time. Now, however, she was stalling. Peewee had returned, about a minute ago, and Twilight had planned to endure another round of pain, for science, once he did so. Of course, she had not promised this, so she was free to change her mind if she wanted... Ah, cowardice. Such a lovely generator for silly thoughts. In a desperate attempt to put herself and the surrounding situation into a humorous light that would hopefully make it easier to muster up the courage she needed, Twilight stepped forward, licking her lips as she slowly, very slowly, began to channel magic through her horn. Leave her own mind... find his... Alright. Now was the time. She touched his mind, not even wincing as the pain returned, assaulting her breast. Perhaps, it was only possible now? To communicate with him, that was. Not that it made a lot of sense, but why not try... Come close... no. I want you to come here and sit on my shoulder. I want you to... come here and sit on my shoulder. Apparently not. Twilight took somewhat of a gaping breath as her perception shifted a bit, and somehow the pain became more real than it had been a moment ago, or perhaps less real. She closed her eyes, trying to release all tension from her body, relax all muscles, and simply observe... the pain... most akin to how some unguents made a wound burn, at first. It would be so much easier if she actually knew that something would come off it. She still understood so little, and all she was really doing was to trigger the process, and hope for new revelations, but could it just as well end up being for naught... just like her previous- ... !!! She was such an idiot. Of course it hadn’t worked. The point would not be for him to read her thoughts, it would be for him to read her feelings, so she had to want him to come and sit on her shoulder, not put that wish into words and then think those words, that was missing the whole point! How had she been... Uh... Excitement was a suitable cure for morning tiredness, so she had found, but not for this kind of pain. She had done better just staying calm. Ah, and she didn’t want to interrupt her session now. She could test that hypothesis later. She was already too far in, and though she didn’t know if time mattered, it was still a distinct possibility. Alas... Stay calm... Stay relaxed... Stay... It hurt... Twilight bit on her lip, perhaps trying to create a lesser source of pain to block out the first. Which was... was of course... nonsense, you didn’t fight fire with fire, that didn’t work. Ah... just two minutes more. Twilight retracted, or so it felt like, back into her shell. Not trying to accept the pain anymore so much as trying to hide from it. It really was, really was not that bad. It really was not. Twilight could remember rare occasions, two to be specific, were she had, had been injured quite badly, and though none of them had hurt as much, as much as now, she would much rather endure this than those injuries. This, this was a bit like jumping into cold water, because, because it took courage to do it, but once you were in, once you were in, at first, it wasn’t even that unpleasant, only if you stayed in too long, like, like now, then it became too cold, and then, then it was, was a bit much. Maybe, maybe she should only take shorter... shorter sessions... because that... but... but then this... this was already her longest session to date, so if she didn’t try to, try to break that in the future, then better make this worthwhile. But... uh... this really was enough. Before she... okay, break it. Twilight retreated, realizing that she had lost her stance, having sort of sunk into a crawling form on the floor. Again, no aftermath. Plus, the absence of pain was quite a wonderful feeling. Twilight shakily took the steps towards her cot. In a way, since she had been so reckless on her first try, it was probably somewhat warranted for her to suffer a bit here... She lay down, not being tired enough to fall asleep, but exhausted enough to fade in and out of consciousness for a bit... strange, unconnected, and incoherent thoughts popped into her mind at random... A bit in, Twilight found herself conscious again, thinking about the time Rarity had- Hold on. This was already the second time she had thought back to that day. And yesterday... yeah, she could remember it vaguely, she had also thought back to that... even... hadn’t it even been twice? Could that really be a coincidence? Or, more relevantly, could it be something else? Quickly, realizing that time might suddenly be a factor, her mind formed another hypothesis. As soon as it was done, she emptied her head, observing her thoughts... Well, that was the blue rabbit, it did not work like that. She couldn’t just not think... not that that was impossible, but it was quite hard, and she had never learned it. If a novice like her tried, then that inevitably resulted in thinking about the fact that she was trying not to think, and then some. Which was annoying, really, because how would she confirm her hypothesis if she was thinking all the time, it had triggered more whenever she had lost track of her own thoughts... Well then... what had happened these days... AJ’s farm had been doing better, though her Grandma had health issues. And she, ah, Pinkie Pie had... there was... the door in Canterlot’s sleeping quarters... really irresponsible acting on her part- Her mind immediately snapped out of it with a surge of excitement as she realized that it had happened again. So the intrusion into the phoenix’ mind redirected her thoughts. Now that was a discovery. And the target was always the day that Rarity and Amethyst Star had come to her, and she had wanted to do the experiment, but Rarity had made her reconsider, and do some preparations first. Why that? Because it was where she had almost entered the phoenix’ mind? No, that seemed far fetched. And it was never the experiment that drew her thoughts, it was the irresponsibility on her part, the... Ah, so that was it? Because she had made a mistake? Did it direct to mistakes? Sure enough, yes, as she thought on it now, she noticed that the thought seemed to be... highlighted, so to speak. Yes, it clearly was a noticeable difference, she was driven to think about it. That was nice, because it meant that she didn’t have to lose consciousness in order to verify her theory. Okay, and what about the mistake she had just made? Conducting the experiment in such a dumb way? ... No, there was nothing. It felt normal. Perhaps, it was not about it being a mistake, perhaps it was about it being irresponsible, or rude, or... When had she done something rude the last time? Frantically, she scoured through the past weeks. Usually, Twilight really tried not to be rude, but surely there were some instances where she had fallen short of that goal; it didn’t take much to be at least a little bit rude, on accident or just due to not thinking enough. Maybe something concerning Pinkie Pie, who was the most sensitive... what about... about... uh... yes, the time that she, no, the time that Pinkie had shown her the dolls she had made of some of her friends, and Twilight had been a bit creeped out and not given a very kind response- Yes! Yes. It was there. It radiated. Not as much, but it did. Quickly, she thought back to the Rarity thing. Ah, there it was, so much stronger. It even seemed to have gained in intensity since her departure, not lost. So that was it. The phoenix’ pain brought into memory all the times when she had hurt other ponies. The only question which remained was... why? Twilight stood up, beginning to pace around the room. If something inflicted pain for-, and called attention to the times where she had hurt other ponies, then there seemed to be two obvious angles for that. One, it was some kind of purification or moral judgment. Two, it was malicious. Everything in her was prone to believe that phoenixes were, for the lack of a better world, good. But what evidence did she really have for that? Peewee had not done anything for her, really, and whenever she tried to approach him, she was rewarded with pain... albeit, a very pure form of pain, that was easier to endure and left no injuries. And... She should test her other hypothesis. That might help. Come to me, Twilight thought, approaching the phoenix, and then she repeated it without words, only wishing, wishing for him to come close. Because if he did, then how could he be evil, if he reacted to her wishes, he could not be, he must be good. Peewee turned his head in her direction, blinking. A new sense of hope washed over her, and she tried to pour it into the wish, to make herself care as much as possible... And then the phoenix flapped his wings and came to her, sitting down on her shoulder. At this moment, Twilight almost cried. “So you are good.” She smiled, knowing that it was true, only true. Peewee let out a chill-inducing cry, and something hot stroke over her mane from behind. He must have extended a wing, but she didn’t turn her head to look, standing still, only feeling his warmth. This, of course, explained a lot. The reason why he had stood still every time Twilight had tried to approach him was that she had wanted him to, and Rarity and Amethyst probably had, too. The reason why he was considerate to her without understanding what she was doing was because he instinctively tried not to hurt her... well, he wouldn’t hurt her by interrupting her studies, but it would still be distracting, irritating for a moment, affecting her in a negative way, even if it was slight. It seemed to fit, as nothing he had ever done had been inconvenient to her, it had all been considerate... and kind. And, was the reason why a connection between them caused pain on her part that she wasn’t as good, not as pure as him? Surely, it was not intended. That would run contrary to everything she had just found out. No, it must be a natural reaction. And Twilight suddenly had an epiphany. She’d have to think about her guilt while being connected to the phoenix, and then... then something would happen... she just knew it... it just seemed right... it would... it would purge it, maybe? But if so, would it eventually be done with it? Them? Her thoughts? Her guilt? And if that was the case, then would it only be temporary, or would she someday be done with all of it? And if that was the case, then what would be next? If she was given absolution, so to speak? What then? She had no idea. Chapter 18While her initial revelation hadn’t come without its eventual share of doubts, they had been all but wiped out no more than five seconds into her next session. She had directed her thoughts onto the incident, and the result had been immediate. The pain, finally having found its target, had ignited her memories, and it had burnt her guilt, putting her through an experience unlike anything she’d felt before. It had been in equal parts horrible and exhilarating, as the pain had still hurt her, but the sensation of diminishing guilt had been one of the most addictive things she had ever felt. Afterwards, she had still been able to recognize her flaws, but she had not felt them anymore; the memory was unstrained, pure; the guilt was gone. Even so, she had broken the connection early, valuing patience over curiosity. The smart thing, she had reasoned, was to to study the effects more thoroughly before proceeding. Since her research still seemed far from its conclusion, she had neglected to tell the princesses about her discoveries. She had, however, told the other girls, and their reaction had not been what she had expected. Rarity had asked if it was possible to establish a connection for other ponies. Twilight had truthfully responded that, yes, that would be possible (and fairly easy, too). Rarity had then asked if she might try it. Twilight had reminded her of the pain that came with it, and had noted that she’d expected them to be more shocked, and certainly less intrigued. Rarity had remarked that she thought to understand why Twilight was doing it, and that losing her guilt, as Twilight had put it, was something she really, really wanted to experience herself, even if it came with certain drawbacks. Twilight had mulled her words over, proceeding to ask the other four if they also felt that way. Applejack had said that, no, the whole thing sounded insane, and why would anypony even consider harming herself voluntarily. Pinkie Pie, oddly enough, had said that she needed to give more thought to the issue. Fluttershy had said, in a somewhat intimidated murmur, that she didn’t think she’d want to go far, but that she still wanted to, um, try. Rainbow Dash had seemed to be fighting with herself, but had eventually declined. Twilight had remarked that it was still potentially dangerous (albeit far beyond the one percent figure), since she had only tested it on herself, and that they would have to be doing it based on their own risk. All three had voiced their understanding and their agreement. Finally, Pinkie had announced that she’d now thought about it enough, and also wanted to try. “If you don’t remember the last time you hurt somepony, try to search for it. It will point you into the right direction. But if it hurts too much, just tell me to get you out. I think it takes a while to get used to. The first time I tried, that... didn’t turn out so well.” Twilight threw a look at Rarity, who gave a confirming nod. “But it was mostly shock, was it not?” “Right.” Twilight’s gaze was fixated at Pinkie, who notably wasn’t bouncing, perhaps implying that she understood the seriousness of the issue. “But if you think it’s injuring you,” Twilight continued, “then please, tell me. Because that really shouldn’t happen. Or, if anything doesn’t fit with what I told you, say something. It might still behave differently for other ponies, and if it does, we should really be careful.” Fluttershy seemed to be shivering a bit, but she didn’t say anything. “I think you should confirm again that you really want to do this. I know that you said yes, but... just... look what you feel right now. If you find yourself wishing that you hadn’t signed up, then just don’t do it. It won’t make you a coward. Remember that even Rainbow Dash wasn’t brave enough.” It was a speech Twilight had prepared beforehoof, and which she felt obligated to give. Too often, ponies did stupid things because of social awkwardness. But none of them took the way out. “I really want to try,” Fluttershy murmured, and the other two nodded. “Well, alright then. Follow me.” She led them upstairs, spotting Peewee at a free spot on her desk. She had tried to tell him to stay inside before, and maybe it had worked. “I always have him sit on the table when I do this. Do you guys remember what I told you about how I can ask him to do things?” Affirmative murmurs from all three. “Well, I’ve been meaning to find out if others can do it, too. I think they can, but I haven’t had a chance to try it just yet. So... Fluttershy, why don’t you give it a shot?” “M-me?” The yellow pegasus seemed to shrink a bit as all heads turned towards her, but after a moment she nodded, stepping forward. “So, uhm, I just... wish for him to... sit on the table?” Twilight nodded. “A... alright.” She took a few steps to the left, positioning herself so that both the phoenix and its desired target fell into her vision. Twilight involuntarily held her breath as she stopped, but only a moment later, Peewee flapped his wings, flying towards the table. That had been quick. Quicker than any time she had done it herself, even. “Wooo!” Pinkie Pie cheered, giggled, and bounced over to the blushing pegasus, drawing her into a hug. “Way to go, Fluttershy!” “Um... t-thanks.” “Well done indeed. That was a pretty unambiguous result.” Twilight happily made an imaginary checkmark onto an imaginary list before moving forward. “Alright. I think we’re ready... who wants to go first?” Silence. “Well, somepony has to.” “I...” “Uhm...” “...” “Err... alright. Well...” Twilight furrowed her brow, thinking. When she couldn’t come up with anything smart to solve the problem, she shrugged. “I guess we randomize?” The others voiced hesitant agreement, so Twilight lit her horn, scourging through various shelves until she produced a single die. “Alright, so Fluttershy’s one and two, Pinkie Pie-” “I’m three and six!” “... Pinkie Pie’s three and six, and Rarity’s four and five. Everypony agree?” Another round of agreement followed, and Twilight tossed the die onto the floor. It rolled farther than she had meant for it, and so everypony, including her, rushed over to see which number had come out on top. “Three!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, right before Twilight could. Then, “That’s me! I won! Or... lost... heheheee...” She visibly gulped, and Twilight even saw a drop of sweat on her forehead. “Ehhehhh... well... alrighties!” She shuffled forward, stepping in front of the table. “Uhm. Uhm. Um. I guess I’m ready? Ohh, uhm, how long does it take? Your connection thing? Do I have to do something?” “If nothing goes wrong, just a few seconds,” Twilight responded, “and – no.” Awaiting another nod from the pink pony, Twilight took the familiar path outside her mind, reaching toward the phoenix. Instead of entering his mind, she did an advanced but safe and light-on-energy spell, that would allow her to drag the connection away as a link; then she pulled it towards her friend. “Alright,” she said, her own heartbeat accelerating. “I’m ready, but you can still say no if you change your mind at the last second.” She waited for a few moments, but Pinkie said nothing, only biting her lip. “Okay then. Three... two... one...” And she connected the link to Pinkie’s mind. Almost immediately, Pinkie let out a strange sound, something like a gasp, but it seemed to resemble surprise, not pain. Then she began to giggle, and didn’t seem to stop. Twilight’s eyebrows inevitably shot upwards as she watched, wondering if it was just a way to- But before she could finish her thought, the giggle morphed into a laugh, and then Pinkie winced hard, plummeting downwards until caught by a white cloud. “Hahahahaaaa... stop that! It... it tickles!” Pinkie gasped again, this time sounding like a frantic gasp for air in between her laughter. “Hehehe... stop it! Stop it!” Twilight broke the connection, ending Pinkie’s laughter at once, but leaving her gasping for breath. What. The. a ??? “Puuhhhhhhh...” Pinkie Pie shook her head, as if shaking off a bad dream. “Nice save, Rarity!” “Er...” Twilight still felt utterly confused. “... yeah. Good... reaction.” “Um, Twilight?” Fluttershy spoke up. “That was, uhm. Not supposed to happen, was it?” “No.” Twilight shook her head. “No.” “Uhm. Why do you think-” “I have no clue.” “Just Pinkie Pie?” Rarity offered. “Or because she’s an earth pony?” Fluttershy suggested. “Hehehee... well, none of you are, so if you try too, then we’ll know!” “Would you say that it is still safe?” “Uhm...” Twilight rubbed her brow as she turned towards Rarity, feeling as if there was a knot in her thoughts. “Well...” Okay. Back on track. “Not... as safe,” she said after a moment of thought. “Previously, we had one ‘safe’ result, and an assumption that it behaved differently for different ponies. Now, it seems that the assumption isn’t true, and we have two ‘safe’ results. But the chance-” “Hey!” Pinkie Pie interrupted her, frowning. “That wasn’t safe! I’ve never been tickled that much before!” “-for a third result not to be safe is, I think, higher than what I thought the chance for it behaving differently at all was before.” “How likely that it...” “Kills us?” “Well, yes.” “Well... one in five-hundred, maybe. Probably less. More like one in a thousand.” A pause. “Alright,” Twilight said, “before we do anything, Pinkie, I want you to describe to me exactly what happened.” Listening to Pinkie, though, had not been helpful. All she had gathered was that it had tickled a lot and apparently at a lot of places. When Twilight had asked whether she wanted to try again, Pinkie had stared at her disbelievingly. “Are you kidding? That was horrible!” she had said. And then she had giggled. Rarity and Fluttershy, however, had both explained that they still wanted to try. Twilight had noted that Rarity would take an even smaller risk since she was a unicorn (like Twilight), and so she had volunteered to go first. Now, Fluttershy stood beside Twilight, and by the way she was shivering, one could have thought that it was her, not Rarity, who was about to put herself through probable pain and improbable risk. “Remember that you can also still change your mind if you want,” Twilight remarked, who wasn’t expecting it to happen any more than with Pinkie. Rarity shook her head, and Twilight nodded. The link was already drawn, all that was left was to close the connection. “Alright then.” “Three.” “Two.” “One.” Rarity gasped, and this gasp did sound like someone who was suffering. Sure enough, as Twilight paid close attention to her expression, she was pretty sure that, this time, they were getting the expected result. Rarity seemed to be put on the edge, and may have already fallen over were it not for Pinkie Pie giving her backup. Her mouth was half-opened, and Twilight briefly wondered whether she herself looked similar during the connection, before- “Stop.” Immediately, Twilight broke the link. As if the connection had held her up on an invisible thread that was now cut, Rarity’s body limply fell into Pinkie’s waiting arms. “You okay?” Fluttershy and Twilight asked in unison. Rarity didn’t answer at first, inhaling flat, quick breaths. “That...” she murmured. “... that was horrible.” And unlike with Pinkie Pie, who had said the same thing, Twilight knew that this wasn’t a joke. “What happened? Anything other than what I predicted?” “N-... no. Thanks, Pinkie.” She gestured for her to let go, and Pinkie hesitantly drew back. “It was like you said. It hurt, it didn’t feel like it was injuring me, and when I... thought about my mistakes... it pointed me to them... and I even felt it working on the memory... briefly... before I left... but Twilight.” She shook her head. “It hurt so much. I cannot believe you are putting yourself through that by choice. You warned me that it would hurt, but... but this much? Darling, just how can you stand it?” “I...” Twilight hesitated, the gears in her head already turning. Unlike Pinkie’s result, this one seemed to make sense, and it offered a number of immediate explanations. “I don’t think it’s because I’m that much tougher than you. If the difference is as big as you say, then that doesn’t seem likely. If I was that tough, I’d know about it. And you... well, are you usually that much more sniveling than other ponies?” Rarity shook her head. “There’s probably another reason, then. Whatever triggers the pain, it’s probably more potent in your case than in mine, so that it actually just hurts more for you than it does for me. That could also be a reason why no-pony has researched them before...” Her voice trailed off. “At least, maybe...” “Are you saying that I just hurt more ponies than you did?” Their eyes met, and Twilight made a deliberate effort not to lower her gaze. This was a situation that called for caution, but not at the cost of honesty. “Maybe,” Twilight responded, “but things are a bit more complicated than that. The, um, relevant question is how it’s measured, and I still think it has to be subjective.” “Pardon?” Both of their gaze fell onto Pinkie Pie. “Twilight, could you maaaybe explain that so I understand? Pretty please?” “Right.” Twilight took a few moments to order her thoughts, thinking of a way to explain. “Okay. Do you guys know what racism is?” Fluttershy nodded, while Rarity and Pinkie shook their heads, and so Twilight gave a brief explanation. “It’s only really a thing among dragons and griffons, but imagine a unicorn who’s really racist towards, say, pegasi, considers them worthless, and believes they don’t have real feelings. The question then is, if he did mean things towards them, and he connected to a phoenix, would it treat those actions as mistakes, or not?” “Oh,” Pinkie said, “I get it! If it’s subthingtive, then the pony thinks he did the right thing, so she’s not being punished!” “Subjective,” Twilight corrected. “But yes, exactly. And I suspect that this really would happen, because-” “-the phoenix isn’t smart enough to know so it has to be what the pony thinks?” “Yeah.” Twilight raised an eyebrow, giving Pinkie a curious look. “So,” Rarity said, “it’s not about how many ponies one has hurt, but how many one believes to have hurt?” “Yes... technically.” “Technically?” “Well. I think it’s about what a pony believes, but that’s not necessarily the same as what she says she believes, or even thinks she believes. Sometimes, ponies think they believe something, but they’re wrong, and in truth they know better. In case of racism, that’s probably often true, but not always.” “Really?” Twilight noticed a trace of skepticism in Rarity’s voice, that had previously not been there. “That sounds a bit like, ah, wishful thinking to me, darling. How can you claim that what they say isn’t really what they believe? Is there even a way to properly tell them apart?” “There is,” Twilight said, “because, because while a pony might say things she doesn’t believe – without realizing it –, she won’t usually do things that don’t fit what she believes. Give me, um, a moment to think of an example.” Rarity nodded. “Okay,” Twilight said after a while, “Imagine a pony who isn’t really any good at painting, but who thinks she’s done great after she’s drawn her first picture. Or rather, she thinks she believes that. Maybe she really does, but if not, then if you asked her to show it to others, she would probably make excuses for why she can’t do it. Even if nopony asked her, she’d probably make those excuses to herself. And if she had to show it to others, she’d probably find explanations for why their judgment doesn’t count, before she even hears it. This shows that she doesn’t really believe it, because if she did, then she’d just go ahead and show it to others – they’d probably like it, right? And still, if you asked her, she’d tell you that she believes others would like it, and it wouldn’t be a lie. She really does think that she believes, it’s just that she’s wrong. “Think about it.” Twilight gave all of them a glance. “Doesn’t that ring a bell? Don’t you remember somepony who’s done something similar before?” “I do, actually.” Pinkie looked impressed. “Wow, Twilight, you’re smart!” Twilight blushed, while Rarity’s brow furrowed. “I believe,” she said, “yes, I believe I have seen that.” Even Fluttershy gave a timid nod. “Mhh...” Twilight licked her lips pensively. “When it comes to how often you’ve hurt others, that’s probably something most ponies know, and so...” “So I really did hurt more ponies than you, yes?” “Probably,” Twilight admitted, “but Rarity, that’s to be expected. Remember that I lived alone in Canterlot for most of my life, so if it really depends on how much you’ve done overall, then it’s only logical. And it’s also not fair towards you, because it doesn’t consider all the times when you’ve helped other ponies...” Rarity nodded. “I see.” “You know I’m not saying this just to make you feel better, right?” Rarity nodded again. “I know, dear. What you said is true.” Feeling relieved, Twilight managed a smile. “It’s also just speculation,” she added. “It seems to fit, but for all we know, there could be another reason and none of what I just said matters.” Rarity nodded once more, then cleared her throat. “Well...” She made a gesture toward the pegasus. “Fluttershy’s been living rather isolated too, hasn’t she?” “Oh.” Twilight hadn’t realized the implications of her theory. “Um, I guess, yeah.” “U-... uhm.” Fluttershy bit her lip. “But I’m a pegasus...” “We don’t know what will happen to her at all!” Pinkie Pie concluded. “True, but if she does react like us two, then I think Rarity is right. She could have an easier time.” “Twilight,” Rarity noted, “what about your time in elementary school?” “Ah. I had... forgotten... about... that...” Twilight’s brow furrowed. “Well, it’s... possible that it doesn’t count because we think we’re not responsible... since we were too young. But it could also count, but because we all have it, it’s still more for you than me. In case of Fluttershy, she, uhm, has been nice as a filly too, from what I’ve heard.” Fluttershy blushed. “So,” Pinkie Pie said, “Fluttershy, are you going to do it? Huh?” “I think so.” “Now?” Twilight made an inviting gesture toward the desk. Blinking, she realized that Peewee was no longer sitting there. “Oooh, he’s gone!” Pinkie Pie giggled, and spun her head in search of him. “Maybe he flew outside?” A few bounces brought her toward the window. “Hehee... Twilight, he’s sitting on a branch. Gosh, it’s easy to forget that we’re all in a tree! Do you want me to try to get-” “No, thank you,” Twilight decided quickly. The most recent experiment suggested that it was best not to use Pinkie Pie as a test subject if the goal was to obtain results that were applicable to normal ponies. “Let Fluttershy do it.” “Oki-doki-loki. Fluttershy, the window is yours. Hehee...” “Three.” “Two.” “Um.” “O- yes?” “Um. I...” Fluttershy shivered, much more heavily than before. Twilight was reminded that she was the mare who used to be too afraid to even speak to any adult ponies beside Rainbow Dash. She gulped, seemingly fighting with herself, then shook her head. “Nothing. Sorry. Go ahead.” “Really, Fluttershy? Are you sure?” Fluttershy nodded. Twilight bit her lip in doubt, but didn’t protest. It wasn’t her decision. “Three,” she began again, “two.” “One.” Immediately, Twilight knew that her hunch had been correct. Whether race was an issue or not, Fluttershy had winced the moment that the connection had been set up, and it had to be because she was receiving the same reaction as Rarity and her. Twilight could hear somewhat akin to a whimper; so quiet that she wouldn’t have heard it had she not listened so closely. But then, Fluttershy’s body relaxed, and Twilight could see her smile. Beside her, Rarity gave a sigh. Pinkie had taken position beside the pegasus, but so far, it seemed as if Fluttershy didn’t need it. “It’s working for her, isn’t it?” Twilight nodded. ”I think so.” “I’m... don’t take it the wrong way, Twilight. I’m not concerned with what it means for me, least not much, and even less am I begrudging either of you. I just wish...” “That you could do it, too?” Rarity nodded. Twilight had no condolences to give at that. It was a shame, and she couldn’t downplay its importance, because she still had no idea where it would lead them. Her eyes flickered back to Fluttershy, whose expression matched perfectly what Twilight had felt during her own sessions; her face not without strain, but simultaneously showing an expression of utter bliss. Over a minute passed, until... “That’s... enough.” Twilight broke the link, and Fluttershy, who had tensed up after all near the end, now relaxed again, taking a few deep breaths. “That was... mh... nice.” Twilight laughed. “Nice? Really? Out of every word you could have used, you called it nice?” “Uh...” Fluttershy notably blushed. “I-I mean... it was a bit... mh... painful... but also wonderful.” “Yeah, that’s more what I thought.” A pause. “Did everything go as I predicted?” Fluttershy nodded, and Pinkie Pie, still standing beside her, gave her a hug. “That’s our Fluttershy! So nice that even a phoenix can’t find stuff to complain!” “He did find a f-few things, actually. But... t-thanks, Pinkie.” “Would you want to do it more often?” Fluttershy nodded. “Uhm. Not... not n-now, though.” “Of course.” Twilight smiled. “Well then,” she said, “thank you all for being test subjects.” Author's Note Author's Notes! Wait, those are mine. My notes! Silly intros aside, I had initially written a thing about how I apparently will be unable to sustain the upload schedule of one chapter per week and that I'd be aiming for one every other week in the future, oh and also how it'd be three weeks this time because I was on vacation for one. That's now I don't even know how many weeks ago. I had an exam afterwards, but the issue is really not one of time. It is more... the degree to which I worry about RL stuff, perhaps? I'm not sure. But something pulled me out of the mindset that I need to write – or even edit, given that the bulk of the chapter has been complete ever since two or so weeks after I published #17. And that made me realize that this is a thing for me. I have stretches of motivation and stretches of no motivation, and they seem to follow each other fairly regularly. Which is a shame, because I'd much rather be motivated all the time. . . There are also reasons related to the chapter itself. It's not that I'm dissatisfied with the story... yet (as was the case with The Shortcut), but... I guess I'm sort of unsure about this particular chapter... mostly about the rationality stuff at the end... the concept of belief in belief... I do like to have things of this nature in the story, I'm just not sure if it was the right time and way and if it was too much. I since also realized what I had understood instinctively for a long time, which is that there is quite a disparity in how I characterize Twilight ... or, really, most of the main 6 – and how others do it. Maybe you can tell, but the thing I dislike most about fiction – as in, about existing fiction, not about the concept – is, to put it bluntly, that authors tend to make characters be morons, and what I mean by that is: how often do characters take a step back, and spend a few minutes to actually think clearly about their situation and what is the best thing they could do? Even (arguably) great literature such as the Harry Potter series, is enormously guilty of this. It is probably a result of the author wanting to get to a series of plot points, and thus instinctively limiting the available options a character has to those that fit his agenda – missing that, all too often, the smartest thing is something really un–story-ish. Like, going to the headmaster and having an in-depth discussion about safety measures at Hogwarts. Or, calling princess Celestia to solve a huge problem instead of risking everyone's lives. Or something as simple as not risking the fate of the entire universe by freeing a near-omnipotent spirit of chaos for no discernible reason. But why are those things untypical for stories? Why is there such a thing as being untypical for a story? Stories are about anything and everything. Having frequently recurring patterns across widely differing settings is pretty damning evidence that there is contrivance going on. Of course, none of this is in any way shape or form limited to the ponyverse. And so, one of the biggest driving motivations behind my writing (that's been around for a while but that I'm now fully conscious of) is to have my characters feel, well, reasonably smart for who they are. It's fine if Rainbow Dash makes an over-hasted decision, but it's something different if the entire cast just misses an obvious third option. And in valuing this much higher than silly things like, say, pacing, this is probably giving my stories an unusual flavor, whether that's a good or a bad thing. Spinning this thought further, I suppose my priorities in writing are the same I have in reading. I drop most random stories I read a few sentences in because of grammar. Among the rest, I drop the most because of their writing style. But if a story has made it that far, then it almost always succeeds or dies with the believability of its characters. That was somewhat of a tangent... I suppose. Ah, back to the story. The point is, what I am largely doing with this story is to invent broad mechanics, then put myself into the mind of a character, and see what she will do, and if it isn't what I had imagined, awesome. No-one cares what I had planned anyway. Needless to say the die-roll has been randomized. I was fully prepared to let its outcome dictate the course of the chapter, and though I had vaguely planed to have a second one, that turned out not to be necessary. Unrelated to all of the above, Putting Your Hoof Down is excluded from this story's canon. You can probably guess why that is relevant. I feel and hope that I am slowly shifting back in the right state of mind as of now, so future chapters might be done in a timely fashion, although probably not at one chapter / week now that they're longer (though, who knows?) I hope Twilight figures stuff out sometime soon, there are a few things that might happen then . . . Chapter 19In the weeks that followed, Twilight was able to observe how her continuous sessions gradually changed deeply rooted assets of who she was. To her, the progression seemed subtle, natural, and even slow, but in truth it moved at a rapid pace, contrasted to how long real change of character usually took. But no development was unwelcome, and so Twilight never looked back to reconsider her course. Above all else, she found herself becoming more relaxed, more at ease. Twilight was a pony who thought a lot about what she should do, and who cared a lot about what those whom she loved might think of her. It had driven her into a habit of constant self-doubt, a habit which had become so natural to her that she hadn’t even been aware of it. She had always liked making lists to make sure she did things in order and wouldn’t miss parts of a project or task, but she had never bothered to order her thoughts this way, nor had checklists ever been effective in preventing herself from worrying about the same things over and over again. No, it had taken a phoenix and the total exposure to her past sins for her to get there. Adding to that, she found herself with a new level of self-control, a second change that was perhaps more directly explainable due to the stark emotions she now put herself through so regularly. It wasn’t as if she’d had a habit of losing her temperament before – she hadn’t – but now, it just seemed... easier. Twilight found herself with an unknown clarity these days, and she was thankful for it. Fluttershy was now a regular sight at the library. She preferred shorter sessions, often just two minutes long, and she usually didn’t seem to be wanting to talk about them, so Twilight didn’t know how far along she was. Still, she kept returning, and the impacts it had on her seemed to be even stronger than those it had on Twilight. She was becoming calmer, steadier, and, whether or not it was real, she was at least giving the impression of increased confidence. After her fifth visit, Fluttershy asked if she could stay a bit longer, and Twilight, who had been reading one of the final books on phoenixes (one that she had previously skipped out on), put it aside with a smile, nodding. “You have something you want to talk about?” The way she had behaved had sort of given it away. Fluttershy nodded. “I... I have, uhm.” Her left hoof drew nervous circles onto the floor. “There’s... well, I’ve... found somepony I’m interested in.” “Oh.” Then, before she could stop herself, “is it Rarity?” “Errm...” Fluttershy blinked. “No. It’s not a mare.” “Oh.” “His name’s Autumn Leaf.” “Never heard of him.” A pause. “Um, Fluttershy – you know I’ve never been in a relationship, right?” “Oh, yes.” “Then why-” “Because... I don’t want romantic advice. About how to, um, pursue, um... but I’d like to hear your opinion on whether I should try at all... and... everything else you have to say about it. I... I don’t even know him, really.” “I see.” Twilight’s eyes trailed over Fluttershy as she tried to give real thought to the issue. As the seconds crept by and the silence was beginning to feel awkward, Twilight cleared her throat to say something, only to change her mind momentarily. “Give me a moment,” she murmured, and Fluttershy nodded. It took the better part of a minute before Twilight had a response she felt satisfied with. “Go for it, I think. But before you do... make sure you are okay, no matter how it ends. You’re happy right now, aren’t you?” “I think so.” “Good.” Twilight nodded. “Don’t be the filly who thinks she has to have this now, otherwise her life will be ruined. Look at it as an opportunity. If something comes off it, great! If not, you’re still off as well as before. Better, actually, because you’ll have learned something, and have something to look back on!” “Mhh.” “That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be confident. I’m sure Rarity will tell you how important confidence is. And I do think you should talk to her if... you do want to try.” “I see.” Fluttershy bowed her head. “Thank you. Can I come by tomorrow?” “Of course. Oh, and Fluttershy?” “Yes?” Twilight smiled. “Good luck.” “You can read my wishes.” Twilight pensively paced around the desk which Peewee was sitting on. “But you don’t understand my wishes.” Her gaze was stuck on the phoenix as she spoke, who showed no reaction. “Everything you do is instinctual.” “You have remarkable powers, but nothing inherently different from other magical creatures.” “So you really are an animal.” She halted for a couple of moments, eyeing the phoenix closely. “You don’t understand a word I’m saying.” “You aren’t bothered by any of this.” Nothing. Twilight’s heart sank a bit. “But I’m not sure this is actually true.” Just to cover her bases, in case he could understand her after all. Alright, that hadn’t worked. Twilight stepped in front of the phoenix, her mind focused on a simple idea. If Peewee was prone to fulfill her wishes as well as he could, and yet wasn’t able to understand her... ... what if she wished for him to understand her? It was a long-shot, but... Trying to put the wish into a feeling rather than words, Twilight squeezed her eyes in concentration. She stood there for what must have been over a minute, trying her best to keep up concentration. Then, she spoke up. “Can you fly up?” She had tried coming up with something simple so as to maximize her chances. Expectantly, she opened her eyes to observe the result, still trying to keep the wish in her mind – not the wish that he’d fly, but the wish that he’d understand her request. After a few moments of nothing, she tried again. “Can you fly up?” ... Well, she hadn’t been expecting it. Onward. Simple tasks, as it turned out, were reliably fulfilled by the phoenix. Be it to fly around, to eat, to make sounds, or anything else she had tried: as long as it was simple and her wish not expressed verbally, he would do it. Difficult tasks, on the other hoof, such as solving addition problems or turning an upside-down container with food in it around, appeared to be impossible, no matter how hard she focused on her wish. Likewise, if she was careful to request a task through language only, avoiding any emotional attachment to the goal expressed, he would consistently ignore her. And that just didn’t seem to make sense... There was a saying in magic theory: ‘magic is the mind of the universe’. It alluded to the fact that magic was the only force in nature which had repeatedly been observed to lead to intelligent behavior. If a door was built to open inwards and a pony went up to it and pushed, even if she pushed at four times the strength required to move it, it wouldn’t open. At best, it would break. But if that same pony applied magic, with the specified goal of ‘open the door,’ then, at some point, her magic would independently decide to first push down the lever and then pull. According to the current state of knowledge, every describable problem was in theory solvable by applying magic intended to do so, even if no strategy was specified to go along with it – indeed, even if a failing strategy was specified, such as ‘open the door by pushing’. Of course, theory and practice were two different sets of horseshoes, and the downside was that brute-forcing intelligence in this way rampantly increased up the amount of magic required. The theory went further. Two more observations were often cited to make this argument: one, strategies executed in this manner tended to be similar to what ponies would come up with, and two, all intelligent life was observed to have magic integrated into its biological structure (yet not all life period: among the flora, only every other plant was magical). This suggested that magic was indeed the root cause of all intelligence, including all intelligent minds of conscious beings such as ponies (and there was no reputable alternative explanation for how else such minds might come to be). Some went further still, arguing that there needed to be some sort of goddess guiding the universe, who was providing magic with its unique property. It was remarked that strategies executed through brute-forced magic were provably non-deterministic, showing minor but undeniable variations even under identical circumstances. Phoenixes were the most magical creatures known to ponykind. If their magic had once been used, perhaps collectively, to aid a good cause (or perhaps without any cause whatsoever), and had thereby followed an intelligent strategy, then some parts of Peewee’s behavior would make sense to Twilight. It would simply be the result of channeling intelligence through magic at a scale which ponies couldn’t possibly replicate. Perhaps ‘intelligence’ was a misunderstood concept and merely a standin for problem solving capabilities, capabilities which had then gone off and decided that the way to do good was to read the minds of ponies around them and accommodate their wishes as well as each phoenix was able to. But if that were the case, then Twilight would also expect Peewee to be able to solve more difficult problems, and yet... Not for the first time, her thoughts came to a halt here. And, not for the first time, it led her to the thought that she might soon find out... except now, ‘soon’ seemed to be right around the corner... Twilight had arrived at her nine-year old self: she had purged all memories of sins up from that age. The farther she had gone back, the fewer memories there had been per year, so she was presumably close to completion. And if she were to finish... what would happen? The most likely answer ought to be ‘nothing.’ Else, what did she expect? That Peewee would suddenly become sentient and reveal all of his secrets to her? Certainly not. Still – after so much effort, she knew she was going to be disappointed if nothing was in fact going to happen. It would still have been worth it, though. A plan took shape in the back of her mind. She would leave it be for today. Go out. She would really like to go out today. Go eat somewhere. Maybe meet some new ponies. Twilight had tried not to neglect her friends during the past weeks, but she had largely neglected seeing pretty much anyone else, except for the occasional visitor to the library. And tomorrow, she’d be taking her final session. It would take a long time, but she wasn’t afraid of the pain anymore. She only felt the drive to reach the end... and find out what was going to happen. Her eyes flickered to the watch on the wall. Ten past seven. Still enough time left until sunset... Where should she go? “Tea?” Twilight asked, offering the cup to her friend. It was so hot that a steady stream of white still ascended from the liquid’s surface. Rainbow snorted, not even bothering to answer. Twilight shrugged, taking the cup for herself (which, incidentally, was also the only one she had brought). “It was worth a try. Alright.” She tilted her head towards the phoenix, who sat on his usual position. “Thanks again for helping me. Are you ready?” The pegasus hesitated. A sudden, jerky movement went through her tail. “... Twilight? You’re not gonna turn crazy, are you?” “Very unlikely.” “And... what if you do?” “Well, that’s kind of what you’re here. I’m sure you can always take me on, right?” “Of course.” Rainbow’s left eyebrow twitched. “As long as you don’t use magic.” Twilight laughed involuntarily. Not joining her, Rainbow frowned. “You did nail me down in mid air once, y’know?” “Oh?” Twilight squeezed her eyes, trying to remember... “Right! I remember! Yeah, well, I was stressed out at that time, you know that. My letter-” “Yes,” Rainbow interrupted her, “I know. So, what’s stopping you from doing something even worse after you let that thing mess you all up inside?” “That thing is a phoenix, Rainbow.” “Meh. It can’t understand me, right?” “Probably not.” Rainbow cast Peewee a nervous glance. “Alright. So, once he messes you all up, who’s to say you don’t freeze me up again... and then start... dunno, something... dunno... something... something crazy, alright?” “Well, for one, everything connecting to Peewee has done to me so far has been the opposite of crazy. He does everything he can to help us. And it’s not like I haven’t connected to him before. I’ve had sessions every day for a while now. It’s just that this will be the last one.” “Uhu...” A pause. Twilight took a sip of her tea. “Can I open the window?” “Sure.” “Okay. I’ll stay here, you do your thing, and if I see you going crazy, I’m outta here.” “... sure. As long as you pick me up and get me to the hospital if I’m breaking down or something.” Rainbow nodded. “Deal.” “Deal.” The pegasus spat on her hoof, holding- “Uw! Rainbow, we’re inside! Can’t we just Pinkie Promise instead?” “Come on, Twilight! Pinkie Promise is for promises. We are making a pact.” Twilight’s eyes flickered from the hoof, which was in mild danger of leaking, down to the floor. “If I do this, do you promise to wash that afterwards?” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Fine.” Twilight nodded, spitting onto her right hoof. “Hold it,” she said after their bump, summoning a tissue. “Don’t try this with Rarity,” she said once all saliva was removed. “Okay. Ready now?” “Hold on.” Rainbow retook her position next to the window. “Ready.” “Rainbow, this is probably going to take over an hour before I’m finished. The Daring Do books are downstairs, in the Adventure section under ‘Y’. Better get them early.” “Sure.” “Also, if somepony comes in, please tell them to come back later.” This had happened before, despite the ‘closed’ sign hanging outside. Back then, she had simply interrupted her sessions, but this time... Twilight gulped. “Alright,” she murmured, more to herself than to her friend, “here goes.” It took less time than she had expected. Near the end, the nature of her memories notably changed, becoming more blurry, less distinct. She wasn’t able to recall exactly where her guilt was coming from, she merely traced it down by instinct. At some point, she suddenly realized how little attention she was paying to the pain, as if it had become a mere afterthought, even though it was as intense as ever. She must have been two, or three years old at the time of her final memory; all she had done to pin it down was to summon the image of a chair in her old living room, and that constant tick, tock, tick, tock of her old watch... which still hung on the wall in her parent’s room, at least if they hadn’t taken it down... Suddenly, it was over. Twilight took a long, panting breath, enjoying the absence of pain as she regained awareness of her surroundings. A pile of comic books, and some regular ones too, were stacked up in a neat pile beside a stool which Rainbow, who seemed to have been mindful enough to treat the library’s property with adequate care, must have brought from the kitchen. She still had her gaze stuck in one, apparently unaware of what had taken place just two yards away. Twilight looked around. The room was still in one piece, and the ground hadn’t begun to rotate or break away. No sudden insights had popped up in her mind as her journey had ended, and Peewee was still acting normally, flapping his wings in a way which usually indicated that he was hungry. It was probably time to be disappointed. “I’m finished,” she said calmly, causing Rainbow’s head to jerk upwards. “Nothing happened, I don’t think.” “You’re okay?” Twilight nodded. “Oh.” Rainbow closed the comic, putting it on top of the pile. “Cool, I guess. And now?” “I don’t know. I was...” She suppressed a sigh. “Er, I was hoping something special would happen, I think. But...” “Hey, at least you haven’t gone crazy.” “Yeah.” Twilight nodded, as much to assure herself as to answer to Rainbow Dash. “Yeah. You’re right.” “So...” Twilight shrugged. “Wanna stay for a bit longer?” “Uh... don’t take this the wrong way, Twilight. Your library is cool and all, but I’ve been sitting still for waay too long. It’s been, what, two hours?” She got off her stool, stretching her limbs. “I really gotta fly, y’know? If you’re sure you’re okay...” Twilight nodded. “... then I think I’m gonna be off for today.” “Right. Thanks a lot for your help, I know making you sit and watch isn’t, well...” “Yeah.” Rainbow grinned. “But s’all good. Smell ya later.” Twilight nodded. “Bye.” Absent-mindedly, she lifted up the book-pile, carrying it downstairs. A part of her was still waiting for something dramatic to happen, but she wasn’t expecting it. And indeed, the rest of the afternoon passed by with no incident relating to her studies, and so did the following two days. She had tried connecting to the phoenix again a couple of times, but now it was just like walking through an abandoned landscape: wide and empty. On Tuesday, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Twilight spent some time together in town. Afterwards, as they passed Sugarcube Corner on the way home, Applejack headed south to Sweet Apple Acres central, while Fluttershy and her headed east to the pegasus’ cottage. Fluttershy was still taking sessions, and Twilight was aiming for some private time to talk a bit about them, outside the context of the library. When they passed the second-last block of buildings at the edge of town, something unusual slid into her field of vision. Confused at first, Twilight could only blink, ready to write it off as a strange hallucination, expecting it to go away momentarily. It didn’t. Twilight felt a chill running down her neck. Cautiously, she took a few more steps towards it, Fluttershy by her side. Her jaw slowly dropped as she realized what she was seeing. In the midst of the alley, at a place she had passed a hundred times before, stood a black spiral tower. Author's Note I... don't have a good excuse for the massive delay. I developed a really sudden, really unexpected, and really frustrating anxiety with this story that doesn't seem to make very much sense even to myself, but it still happened. I apologize to everyone who has been let down. One thing which bears mentioning is that, since uploading the previous chapter (gosh it's been long!), I have learned the unsettling truth that our species' fate is likely going to be decided in a few decades. This has nothing to do with the story, but it is the most important thing in the known universe since humanity's inception, so I feel obligated to mention it anyway (plus it doesn't exactly speed up writing progress). See my latest blog post for details, point #1. Shoutout to EverfreePony, who is partially responsible for FINALLY getting me back on track. Chapter 20In the midst of the alley stood a black spiral tower. “What,” Twilight murmured, her voice halfway between a spoken word and a whisper. “What,” she repeated, as if voicing her shock would provide an explanation. “What...” What...!!! “Hm?” Twilight turned her head. With one look, she knew that the pegasus wasn’t seeing it. “There is a black tower standing in the midst of the alley,” she said calmly. “Uhm.” Fluttershy made a face, signaling that she thought to be missing a joke. “There is a black tower standing in the midst of the alley,” Twilight repeated, “right there.” She pointed towards it. “You are serious?” Twilight nodded. “A spiral tower. It’s, like, two yards wide, circular, and all black. Maybe twenty yards tall. And gets thinner near the top.” “And it’s right here?” “Yeah.” Twilight pressed her eyelids together, counting to five before reopening them. The tower was still there. “I’ve been to this alley a dozen times,” she murmured, “no, more than that.” “So have I.” Twilight nodded. “Right. And it hasn’t been there before.” “Or you haven’t seen it before.” “Yeah.” There was a black spiral tower standing in the midst of the alley. Just a few yards in front of them. It looked utterly out of place. This was not something ponies would build; not in Ponyville, not ever. It was without decoration, without apparent purpose, just black and still. It looked... menacing, yet at the same time, Twilight felt no sensation of threat. She wasn’t afraid, she was just... Just... “What do we do?” ... disturbed. Twilight didn’t answer immediately. In trance, she kept staring at the tower... As the words got through to her, she realized just how easy of a question it was. “We have to tell the princess.” “Okay.” “You want to come with me?” “Uhm, sure... EEP!” Both of the pegasus’ wings burst outward as they suddenly changed location, reappearing on the bottom floor of the library. “Yeesh, Twilight! Don’t do that! Give me a warning first!” “Sorry,” Twilight shouted, already dashing towards the stairs, only to return ten seconds later, quill and paper in her grasp. “Dear Princess Celestia,” she read aloud while writing, “Fluttershy and I have just encountered an apparent impossibility: a black tower appearing in an alley on the south-east side of Ponyville, near Town Hall. Only I was-” She stopped as Fluttershy gave her a firm poke at the shoulder. Her gaze detached itself from the letter, finding not Fluttershy but the phoenix, who she now realized must have followed her from upstairs. It was unusual, the way he was focused on her, and as her heart began to beat faster, he slowly shook his head. Chapter 22“How dangerous is this, exactly?” All six elements were assembled in a particular alley, though only Fluttershy knew why. The others, Twilight had merely told that there had been exciting progress, but that it would be better to hide specifics for the time being. “Well,” she responded in a factual tone of voice, “the dangerous part is I don’t really know what we’re dealing with. The reassuring part is that everything I thought was dangerous before turned out to be fine.” “Why should we take the risk at all, though?” “‘cause Twilight’s in love with science,” Rainbow Dash answered for her, causing a giggle from Pinkie Pie. “That’s not the only reason,” Twilight clarified, which in turn caused a giggle from Fluttershy, “but while I still can’t tell you the rest, I’m pretty sure that the first experiment is safe. How about we do this, and afterwards we reassess? I can also tell you what this is all about, then.” Rarity nodded. “Alright.” “Anypony else has objections? Anyone?” “Nah.” “Nopie-dopie-lopie!” “Uh, Twilight?” “Yes, Applejack?” “Is Peewee being here part of that plan o’yours?” “Oh.” Twilight’s gaze followed the farmpony’s hoof to the phoenix, who was indeed sitting on a nearby roof. Was he here to oversee the experiment? Twilight hadn’t forgotten what the princess had written to her three months back: Philomena is here, reading the letter, or perhaps reading my mind, or perhaps sitting on my shoulder because it is comfortable. The weeks which had followed had made that slide into the background, but now that it seemed as if phoenixes were able to change between being animals and persons, all of her earlier suspicions were back on the table. “Oh, hi there!” Pinkie waved in his direction, giggling. “I didn’t know he likes flying publicly!” “He doesn’t,” Twilight murmured, “I think he wants to watch.” “Err,” Applejack made, “watch what, Twilight?” “Right.” She cleared her throat. “The experiment. I need a volunteer, or better two. All I need you to do is walk across the alley.” “If that’s all.” Applejack made a step forward. “Oh, can I? Can I?” “Can I also fly?” “Yes, actually,” Twilight said to Rainbow Dash, “sorry, Pinkie, but I’d rather have two other ponies go first. Okay, so Rainbow, I need you to fly from here...” She walked a few steps to the side. “... to there.” She pointed directly towards the tower, but to Applejack and Rainbow it must have looked as if she was pointing to the end of the alley. “And Applejack, you can do the same on the ground. What’s important is that you both walk – or fly – slowly, and adjust your course if we tell you to.” She shot a brief gaze to the phoenix, who seemed to be observing the scene motionlessly. “Ready?” “You got it!” Rainbow Dash flapped her wings, ascending until she was at a spot right above Applejack. “Alright, you can go. Rainbow, don’t fly higher, please.” Twilight watched, her heartbeat steadily accelerating as they both came closer to the Spiral Tower. “A bit more left,” she instructed, causing the farmpony to move a bit to the side, and Rainbow Dash following suit above her. “A tiny bit more.” Now, just a few more steps... As she was right at its base, Applejack did a stroll to the side, walking around the tower, and though Twilight couldn’t see it well because the tower was also blocking her vision, she appeared to have returned to her previous course imminently. She also wasn’t sure whether Rainbow Dash had dodged it, but she didn’t appear to have made contact. “You can stop,” Twilight called, running over to where Fluttershy was standing. “Did you see how she-” “-suddenly changed directions? Yes, I saw it.” “And did she turn right back around? I couldn’t see it.” Fluttershy nodded. “And Rainbow Dash?” “I only looked at Applejack, sorry.” “That’s okay.” She gave Fluttershy smile, turning to her two subjects as they returned. “Thanks. That was very informative.” “It was?” Applejack sounded skeptical. “Yeah. In fact, Rainbow Dash, I’d like you to do it again.” “Err...” Rainbow shrugged. “Sure.” “Fly a bit lower this time.” “Sure. From here?” “Not quite.” Once more, Twilight walked to a spot from which they were headed straight towards the tower. They were now working for him, she thought as Rainbow Dash got ready. Finally, there was something he wanted... but it was different this time, not like it had been and still was with Celestia; she had chosen to do this, and it wasn’t like- “Twilight?” She snapped out of her thoughts, turning to the questioner. “Yes?” Fluttershy just pointed at Rainbow Dash, who was now close to the tower. “Stop!” Twilight called immediately. “Too far left!” Rainbow adjusted her course, looking over her shoulder for affirmation. “That’s fine. Keep on going!” This time, it was unambiguous: Rainbow Dash flew to the right, just before she would collide with the tower, but re-adjusted her course immediately afterwards, just like Applejack had done. “Okay! You can come back now.” “She doesn’t seem to have noticed,” Fluttershy said, who must have just seen Rainbow Dash dodge an object still invisible to her, even if she knew it existed. “Did you notice anything strange?” Twilight asked Rainbow once she was in ear range. ”Anything at all?” “Err, nope!” “Did any of you?” Twilight asked the others. “Uh-huh,” Pinkie Pie responded, while Rarity and Applejack nodded. “Rainbow Dash doesn’t seem to have noticed. Why don’t you tell her what you saw, Pinkie Pie?” “You made a curve!” “I what?” “You flew in a curve!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “The first time it was to the left, and the second time it was to the right, even though Twilight told you to fly straight! I thought it would be easy for you!” Rarity nodded in agreement. “Is it because you hurt your wing?” “What?” Applejack and Twilight asked simultaneously. “Rainbow Dash wasn’t flying evenly. Her left wing beats were stronger than the right ones.” “I... did hurt my right wing,” Rainbow Dash said, “but that was over a week ago. Not even a Cloudsdale judge would notice that. How did you...?” Pinkie Pie shrugged. “I like how you’re flying, Dashie. I know how it looks!” “Well” Twilight said, “that doesn’t seem to have anything to do with my experiment. So neither of you noticed that you were changing directions while you were walking?” Both of them shook their heads. “That’s amazing...” Twilight stared at the tower in new-found awe, wondering just how hard it would be to create a spell that worked to such perfection. Permanent invisibility of such a large object was already impressive, and making ponies walk around it even more so, but doing it with enough subtlety for the affected subject to remain clueless even as she was specifically focusing on her walking pattern, that was nothing short of incredible. The level of skill required to make this work went far beyond Twilight’s current abilities, and if there even was another unicorn out there who was this good, then she had never heard of her. Twilight doubted it. And even if there was one, why in Celestia’s name would she use her skills for such a purpose? No. Whoever – or whatever – was supplying this magic, it was not a pony. “Alright...” she murmured. “The next thing we’re going to do is to have Fluttershy, who already knows what’s there, try the same thing. Fluttershy, could you step here...” Once more, Twilight pointed to the spot. “... and walk in a straight line?” Fluttershy nodded. “More right,” Twilight called as she was only a few steps away, and Fluttershy corrected her course, now heading directly into the black wall- -until, right before, she suddenly deflected to the right. After about a second, she seemed to notice her own actions, halting for a few moments before she continued. Just like Applejack and Rainbow Dash, she completed a semicircle around the tower, but didn’t bother with walking any further, instead returning to the other five. “I noticed it right after I walked to the side,” she reported, “but, uhm, I didn’t want to... um, try to walk straight at it.” “Walk straight at what?” Rarity now asked, having watched the scene with increasingly apparent curiosity. “There is a black tower standing in the middle of the alley,” Twilight said. Nobody laughed. They had all seen the experiment. Pinkie stopped bouncing, making Twilight realize for the first time that she had done so before. “Hoboy,” Applejack murmured. “You mean right there? And we can’t see-” Twilight shook her head. “Only I can see it.” “Because of him?” Pinkie asked, pointing at the phoenix. Twilight nodded. “How tall is it?” Rarity asked. “Fifteen yards, maybe. Rainbow, would you fly upwards, please? Slowly? ... stop. Okay, a bit higher. Yeah, right there. That’s how high it goes. Thanks, Rainbow. And it gets thinner near the top, and it has a spiral to it.” “What color?” “Black.” Twilight looked at the questioner. “Pinkie, do you want to try next?” “To walk?” Twilight nodded. “Uh, sure! I’ve been here plenty of times before, after all! Nothing bad’s ever happened.” Like the others before her, she walked in a straight line directly towards the tower at Twilight’s directions. When she was right in front, she did a step to the side, and then- “Ouff!” -she bumped right into it. “Oh my gosh, Pinkie, are you okay?” Fluttershy rushed over to her, while Twilight was rendered speechless for the moment. “Darling, you don’t actually want us to go... in there, do you?” Rarity asked, once it became clear that Pinkie hadn’t hurt herself anymore than she would have by walking into a wall (which, Twilight mused, had surely happened before). “Err,” she made. “Well, only volunteers, of course. But... yeah, I doubt we’re going to get far just looking at it from the outside.” “Does it even have an entrance?” “I haven’t seen one, but I haven’t been looking very closely.” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “It could be hidden, somewhere. That’s what I suspect. But I could also just teleport us inside.” “Teleport inside of an invisible black tower? I don’t know about this, Twilight. I know you like-” “It’s not about science anymore, Rarity. We have been instructed to do this by a phoenix. A phoenix!” “I’m afraid I don’t follow your enthusiasm, Twilight.” “A species which can come back from the dead!” Twilight exclaimed. “We’re talking about a species here that is so... so... respected that even Princess Celestia is afraid of them. What would you do if god itself came to Equestria and told you-” “-God?” Rarity interrupted, sounding highly skeptical. “Really, Twilight? The last time I checked, the two beings which are the closest to divinity are two ponies living in Canterlot, and as far as I know, most ponies don’t believe that there is someone sitting in the sky who watches over us all any more than Luna does. Just because Peewee can do some things we can’t explain-” “Coming back from the dead is not just doing ‘something we can’t explain!’ It is doing the one thing in the universe which is supposed to be impossible! How can you just-” “Don’t be overly dramatic, please. That is my job.” It was a clear attempt to break some of the tension, but while she heard Rainbow Dash laugh and Applejack snicker, she herself was too upset for it to work. “It is hardly the only thing which is impossible, either. What about time travel?” “Time travel to the future appears to be possible, and time travel to the past is, eh, it’s not even fair to treat it as something that could be possible, because the universe couldn’t be logically coherent-” “Ahem,” Applejack made, “you ladies might wanna get back on topic.” “No matter how special they are, it simply does not make sense to risk one’s life in such an irresponsible fashion, when-” “I’m not going to ignore-” But Twilight cut herself off, taking a few deep breaths. “Sorry, Rarity. Continue?” “Thank you. When we don’t even know what for.” “Right,” Twilight said, “sure. I get what you’re saying. And what I’m saying is that if a phoenix tells me to do something, then I’m gonna do it.” “But why?” “Because...” But Twilight was lost for words. She didn’t understand why Rarity didn’t understand! How she could turn her head from this. Did she not see how everything they had learned pointed towards phoenixes being a force of good through and through, more so than ponies, how they were more magical than anything else in the world and just how could you want to refuse them?? “Listen,” she now said, “listen. Right now, based on what I know, phoenixes could... literally be magic itself, or even... even... they could be integral to the universe in a way we will never understand! If the phoenix told us to do this, then there must be a reason. An important reason! Not doing it just can’t be right!” “Twilight, you’ve been more... objective these past weeks than you ever used to be, which I had attributed to your sessions. And there is nothing wrong with that, but now you are telling us to do something because it doesn’t feel right not to? I’m sorry, but that does not fit.” “I,” Twilight said, “I... I...” Frustrated, she took a look at the other four, who had all been listening silently, even Pinkie Pie. Twilight overwhelmingly felt that she was right about this, but as of now she didn’t know how to explain, even to herself, why that was. “You’re winning the argument,” she murmured, “but I don’t think you’re right.” “And that fits even less.” “Yeah, I know.” “I know this is all super-duper important,” Pinkie unexpectedly said, “but you guys do realize that we’re in a public street, right?” “Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said with a chuckle, “you were getting a bit loud there, Twi.” Somewhat alarmed, Twilight took a look around. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Pinkie Pie, who’s living here?” “Bell Perin, Berry Dreams, and Ballad! I always thought ‘Ballad’ was a funny name, don’t you? Do you think she changed it so that there would be three ponies whose names all start with a ‘B’ living next to each other? “No,” Twilight responded, who didn’t recall any of the names listed, “but we should probably leave. I, uh, could take you all out to eat. Are you hungry?” “Nah,” Rainbow said, but Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Rarity all said yes. “Eh. Fine. I’ll come with you.” “I don’t even know if you can change your name after you already got your Cutie Mark!” “I didn’t mean to be rude,” Twilight said to Rarity while Applejack was responding something, “I think it’s great that you, um, take a stance for what you think is right.” Rarity nodded. “Think nothing of it, dear.” “Thanks,” Twilight said with a smile, throwing one last look over her shoulder before the group walked out of sight range. Both the tower and the phoenix were still there. Chapter 24Darkness. Twilight immediately realized that things had gone wrong. It shouldn’t be dark. She had teleported with a light spell already cast. And the weight on her back shouldn’t be gone... but it was. She lit her horn again, only to be rewarded with a sinking feeling of crippling fear. Gray light illuminated something far larger than the tower. Only a dark wall beside them was visible. “Your saddlebags are gone, too,” Rainbow Dash said. “Twilight, what’s going on?” “I don’t know,” Twilight whispered. “Rainbow, the light shouldn’t be gray.” “What?” “Unicorn magic is always bound to a color. Mine is purple. If I cast light, it’s purple. It’s never gray. It shouldn’t be gray.” “It’s messing with-” “That shouldn’t be possible!” Twilight hissed, for a moment close to panic. “You can’t mess with magic! That’s not how it works! That’s how ponies who have no idea think it works!” “Twilight! Calm down!” Twilight said nothing. It wasn’t that landing in a larger place was unexpected. Dilation magic was feasible. Earlier, during their preparations, Twilight had argued that, based on the level of ability the tower had demonstrated thus far, they should account for the possibility of its insides being significantly larger than the space it occupied. But it didn’t matter, because almost all of their preparation was lost. The food they had packed was now just as useful as their pre-charged crystals, their candles, clothes, lighters, the phile of preserved dragon fire, their compass... “Are you sure you didn’t do anything different-” “Yes.” “Okay. Relax, Twilight.” Twilight nodded. “It’s also not as bright as it should be... let me see...” She increased the flow of magic and the light brightened, but not as much as it should. Apparently, a bigger toll of magic was now required to achieve the same effect, which, once again, should not be possible. The increased light had neither illuminated another wall, nor the ceiling. Twilight brought it back down, closing her eyes. “I can’t teleport,” she said after a moment. “it’s blocked.” “Awesome,” Rainbow said cynically. “So we’re trapped.” “Yeah.” She sighed. “I guess we have to walk.” “Ahem.” “What?” For a moment, they looked at each other. Then, Twilight noticed the pegasus demonstrably flapping her wings. “Oh! Right!” Rainbow grinned. “But we might be in here for while. Won’t it be too exhausting for you?” “Nah. I could fly you around for hours, if I have to.” She held her wings outward and lowered her hind legs, clearly signaling Twilight to climb onto her back. After a moment of hesitation, she complied. The pegasus’ body was warm to the touch. She had expected that; out of the three races, pegasi had the highest body temperature, and unicorns the lowest. What she hadn’t expected was how intimate it felt, her hooves wrapped around Rainbow’s neck and their bodies pressing together. This must have been why pegasi carrying other ponies was such a rare sight, even though everypony liked to fly. “Ready?” “Yeah.” Twilight held her breath, then they were suddenly in the air. It had gone so fast that she was still processing it, taking a few moments to realize that Rainbow had said something. Something. “Come again?” “Where should we go? Up?” “Oh. Um, yeah. Let’s see how high this thing is.” “Alright.” They ascended. Slowly, as their only guidance was Twilight's own, dim light. She hadn’t expected for it to take more than a few moments, but as the seconds crept by, they just continued ascending higher and higher, the ground long out of sight. Save for the one gray wall, the darkness was absolute. “This is creepy.” Twilight said nothing. She noticed her heart beating faster than normally, and wondered whether Rainbow would be able to feel it. After a while, she decided to once again to increase the flow of energy feeding the light, a choice she was immediately grateful for. “If I’m not even walking myself...” she murmured. “This way we’re less likely to crash into the ceiling.” Rainbow’s response was to fly faster. Twilight bit her lip. That was not what she had intended, but she didn’t complain. They continued. A minute passed... ... and more seconds kept creeping by. How long had it been, now? Ninety seconds? Too long. “Stop,” she heard herself say. “This isn’t good.” She could feel a moment of weightlessness as Rainbow halted in her ascent, then they were back to their slight hovering, up... down... up... down... “If it’s a simple dilatation spell, and the tower is empty, then going up will take much longer than going forward.” “Should I get us back down?” “Uhm. I’d try to fly along the wall. If that’s easier when we’re near the ground, you can go back down, but if not you can stay at this height. I just don’t want you to get exhausted. Flying upwards can’t be easy.” “It’s fine,” Rainbow said, and there was a sudden pull to Twilight’s hooves as she began to fly forward, parallel to the wall. “I’m not exhausted that quickly.” “But f-flying...” She interrupted herself at the sound of her own words. Had she been stuttering? That was so unlike her. “... upwards must he harder than going straight.” “Sure, but it was just a few minutes. I’m fine, don’t worry.” Twilight closed her eyes, then opened them at the sudden rush of claustrophobia. What was wrong with her? Was it because of Rainbow? ... no. She’d like to believe that. That would be harmless. Cute, even. But it wasn’t true. She was afraid, simple as that. It seemed as if the tower was hollow, with the same shape as seen from outside, but far, far larger. There was then no guarantee whatsoever for a way out to even exist. Suddenly, Rainbow Dash slowed down, causing Twilight, who hadn’t been ready for a thrust in this direction, to be pushed forward, instinctively summoning her magic to stop- “Aaahrgh!” “Sorry!” Twilight shrieked, her heart now racing. “Sorry sorry sorry!” “Ow... what was that?” “You, you slowed down so abruptly and I was losing my grip I so, I, um, I helped out a little with magic, and-” “It felt like someone hit me at the back of the head with a rock!” “I had to push against something!” “Ow,” Rainbow repeated. “Ow. Okay. Don’t do that again.” “I promise. Sorry.” Then, “thanks for not... uhm, dropping me or something. You reacted great.” “Used to stuff like this,” Rainbow murmured. “Okay, so the tower’s not all empty.” Twilight nodded, only to realize the uselessness of that gesture. “Yeah.” The reason why Rainbow had slowed down so abruptly was the wall that had appeared in front of them – although, in the end, they had come to a halt several yards early. Perhaps she wasn’t the only one who was nervous. As Rainbow flew closer, Twilight could see that the former wall was simply bending into the new one; a rounded corner. At least now, there were walls on two sides. Little as it was, it seemed to diminish the earlier sense of being lost a bit. “What now?” “Hold on,” Twilight murmured, reaching out with her senses. To her surprise, she found not what she had been looking for, but instead – “Fly up again.” “Huh?” “There’s a ceiling. Close.” As Rainbow ascended further, Twilight realized she’d been wrong. What she had thought to be a ceiling was merely the wall bending outward and then inward again, forming a sort of ring, a bulge, or a platform. Judging from what little part they could see, it appeared to be protruding equally far out of the wall at all points. Where the wall itself bent, so did the bulge. Without hesitation, and before Twilight could warn her (if she had wanted to), Rainbow landed on its top. It was perhaps ten yards wide, though less than half of it was even enough to stand. “Is this one of the spirals?” Rainbow asked. “You told me the tower had spirals to it. If they bulge inward...” “I don’t think so. It’s too even. Horizontally, I mean. If it was one of the spirals, it should be like a large slide.” “Don’t you want to climb off?” “Um,” Twilight made. “Um.” “You can stand no problem here. Just don’t go too far forward.” “Can you turn around first? I want you to be able to catch me if...” Rainbow turned on the spot. Twilight climbed off, then turned around to face the wall again. This way, the platform sloped upward, like a ramp, until it merged back into the wall. “Be still prepared to catch me,” she murmured. “Just in case this thing disappears or something.” “Okay.” “Also, thanks,” she said, turning to face her friend. “I’m glad I didn’t go alone.” Rainbow nodded. She didn’t say anything about being trapped, that Twilight had potentially endangered both of their lives, or about the incident from before. Twilight felt a sudden, unexpected wave of sympathy. “What do we do now?” “Give me a moment.” Once again, Twilight reached out with her senses, and once again, she was surprised. “There’s a real ceiling. Not that far up.” “You want me to fly us there?” “Can’t hurt.” Rainbow nodded. “Jump on.” It was less awkward this time. Twilight had already learned how it would feel, and a bit about how to stay firm without tightening her grasp too much. She could feel that Rainbow was flying more slowly now, but it still didn’t even take half a minute to reach the top. Neither of them probably had expected anything else at this point: once again, there were no edges, the wall simply bent to slope over their heads, forming what must be a sort of dome. It was hard to judge how exactly it was shaped, given that all they saw was a tiny, poorly lit sliver. “Where now?” Twilight suddenly realized how naturally Rainbow turned to her for directions. “I... I think follow this for a bit, then if... everything is normal, you can fly back down.” “Alright.” With steady wingbeats, Rainbow flew them forward, inches below the dome and still parallel to the wall. Twilight wondered whether they really were at the tower’s top. She doubted it. The actual tower was too thin near its top. This was so wide that she couldn’t even tell whether it was still bent, and as she asked Rainbow, neither could she. The flight downward frightened her more than anything before. It seemed like a fall. Like they both were falling into an infinite abyss, with nothing but a gray wall beside them. Then they reached the ground. “What now?” “Let me think,” Twilight said, trying to visualize the route they’d taken. “... okay. Fly further. But stay low.” Once more, Rainbow did as she was told. Twilight kept her gaze at at it, searching for kind of irregularity, but finding none. And they flew. And flew. The passing of time didn’t serve to ease her worries. In the best case, they were now passing along the tower’s diameter, and even then, every second meant she had to adjust her estimate of the interior’s size further upward. They most certainly hadn’t reached the ceiling before. If proportions were preserved, the tower was far, far higher than the meek distance they had bridged earlier. A hundred times as high, and more by the second. “How does dilatation work, Twilight?” Rainbow eventually asked, without slowing down. “Magic?” “Yeah.” “You take the space you need from somewhere else. You can’t create it. You also can’t move it, not really. But you can tell the world that it’s now where you want it to be. Imagine you have a map of a mountain, and you want the route upwards to be shorter. You can’t change the mountain, but you can redraw your map, and you can try to convince the world to accept your new map in place of the old one. Dilatation works just like that. You take a large space from somewhere, and you convince the world that this space is now inside the tower. But in truth, it’s not. In truth, subjects entering the borrowed space are in essence teleported to wherever the space really lies, but for us it’s impossible to tell the difference. The borrowed space bends around the real space perfectly.” “And where do you take it from?” “Any place that will stay abandoned. Um, you see, you changed the entry points of the space you tried to move. If I take the inside of the library and convince the world it’s now in Sugarcube Corner, then the new way of getting into the space of the library is now through Sugarcube Corner – not through entering the library anymore. But, if somepony tries to do it the old way and enters the library, things go wrong. The world realizes it’s been lied to, so it tears up your new map and goes back to the old one. You have to take it from a place that no-one will enter. Like a sealed room. If you don’t have that and you’re strong enough, you can look for holes in the earth. Empty caves. The earth is full of that. The farther you can go, the more likely it’ll stay empty. Animals only go so deep.” She hesitated. “But this is too large for a cave. And you can’t add places together.” “Just take a piece of the sky?” “Can’t. There are birds which fly miles above ground, and you need some proximity to matter. Don’t ask why. That’s why caves work. It could... be a large, empty stretch of land somewhere. Far away. I don’t know. Or... on the moon, I guess.” “Isn’t that too far?” “I don’t know. Too far for me.” They kept flying. Twilight thought Rainbow’s wing beats were getting more forceful, less smooth. But perhaps she was imagining things. “So we’re not even really in the tower.” “No. Not really.” “We’re on the moon.” “Maybe.” Twilight gulped. “Probably.” Chapter 25“That’s why the light is gray!” Twilight said at once, hit by a sudden revelation. “And why it takes more energy! I didn’t think about it because it never matters, but magic does work differently on other planets! It’s harder for me because we’re not in Equestria anymore! Or anywhere else on the plane! We’re on the moon, Rainbow! We’re really on the moon!” For a few moments, her fear was replaced entirely by the sense of discovery, the rush of euphoria. No unicorn was powerful enough to borrow space from the moon. This went far above her own abilities. Above Celestia’s. But the tower had done it. Here they were, perhaps the first mortals in history to literally be on the moon! On the moon! “And you know what else this means? It means there is a limit to how far the world is actually fooled! It’s an open question in magic theory whether the world knows on some level that the new map isn’t real, and the consensus is that, no, the deception is perfect. But it isn’t! This is proof! Not even the tower can fool the world perfectly. Rainbow, this is huge!” “Twilight,” Rainbow said, her voice tense and worried, and also quiet. “I get it. But... we don’t know what’s in here. Don’t be so... loud.” At once, the fear came back, and Twilight almost wanted to bite off her own tongue. She was so stupid. The second she had found out something exciting, she had thrown all precaution overboard. Who cared if they had found new revelations if they didn’t make it out of here? Teleportation from the inside was still at least partially blocked, their supplies were still gone, and they still had no idea what might be in here. Worse. It might be a huge discovery, but it was bad for them. If the space was taken from the moon, then there was barely a practical limit to how large the tower might be... actually no, that was not quite right. The limit would be the maximum distance that space needed to have with matter in order for the spell to work. How large was that... four miles? It was a constant figure. But it was also a boring, pointless, theoretical number that never mattered and Celestia help her she had actually forgotten it. How could she have known that it would end up being important? “I’m an idiot and I’m sorry,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow had halted, now hovering on the spot. “Rainbow, how far do you think we’ve flown so far?” “Three or four miles,” Rainbow replied. “Why?” “I’m thinking how large this thing can be. I told you there’s a limit to how far you can get away from matter. But... argh! I forgot the exact number! I’m such an idiot! I think it was four-point-something.” “Miles?” “Yeah.” “So we’re almost there?” Rainbow asked, while the gears already spun further in Twilight’s head. “No, wait! Wouldn’t that mean the tower is that high, not that wide? Shouldn’t it be much smaller, then?” “It must be flipped,” Twilight murmured. “The real tower is twenty-one yards tall, two-and-a-half yards wide. If you imagine a cylindric shape like that put up straight on the moon... then the tower would be as high as the distance you can have from the surface. So twenty-one yards correspond to, let’s say, four-and-a-half miles, that means two-and-a-half yards correspond to... just around half a mile. We’d already be on the other side. But if you lay down the cylinder, its diameter will be four-and-a-half miles, but it’ll be much higher, and-” Twilight stopped talking as she realized yet another mistake. Rainbow must have felt that something wasn’t right. “Twilight?” “Crap,” Twilight whispered. “It’s the moon. The number, four-point-something, it’s anti-proportional to the gravity of the celestial body squared. The gravity on the moon...” For a moment, Twilight thought she had forgotten that number too, but then she remembered. Once, over a decade ago, she had looked it up herself. “... sixteen percent of what it is here. So it is... roughly one sixth. That means it’s not four-and-a-half miles, it’s... thirty-six times that. Over one-hundred-and-sixty miles.” “Oh,” Rainbow said, and now Twilight could hear the fear in her voice. “That’s far.” And as if the news were too much for her to stomach, she descended back to the ground, allowing Twilight to climb off. “You can’t do that,” Twilight whispered, “right?” “I...” Rainbow gulped. “It’s so far...” A few moments passed in perfect silence. “... I can fly seventy miles per hour, under good conditions. But... not while carrying you. And not forever. And not if I have to fly so slow.” “Uhm,” Twilight made as she realized she had forgotten yet another factor: the moon’s curvature. Doing a few quick calculations, though, she realized that it made next to no difference. “We don’t know if it’s that far,” she said instead. “We don’t even know if flying to the other side is what we need to do.” “We might be trapped anyway.” The words sent a surge of guilt through Twilight’s breast, but she didn’t show it. “Yeah.” “But you think we should try?” “Only if we have a realistic chance. But if we crash...” “You’re the unicorn. Find a solution.” Twilight nodded, quickly considering a number of possibilities. A much brighter light? Unsustainable. Sensing for things constantly? Less costly, still far from possible. Summoning a small piece of energy with a link back to her, and keeping it at a reasonable distance, so she would know if it hit the wall first, and could warn Rainbow in time? It took her a few seconds to dismiss this one. Judging by how much harder magic was for her here, she’d probably be able to sustain it for about one hour – if that. She needed something better. Better by a factor of about ten. “... Twilight?” Rainbow’s voice reached her. “Twi? Can you make light again? It’s so creepy to see nothing. You could have disappeared and I wouldn’t notice.” “Sorry,” Twilight said, redoing her spell. “I’ve been thinking about how to do this.” “... and?” “It’s really hard. I only have one idea that can work, and it’s... not a good one.” “What is it?” “I could cast a preemptive shield to lessen the impact,” Twilight said reluctantly. “We would still crash into the wall, but the impact would be lighter. Judging by how much harder magic is for me here, it would also take a lot of energy at once when we use it.” “... can’t you just prevent the crash?” “I don’t think so. I’m sorry, Rainbow. But I can’t think of anything. I don’t think there is a spell I could sustain for more than an hour that would do the trick.” “One hour is not enough.” “I know.” “Why does it have to be one-sixty?” Rainbow asked, her voice sounding dull and strained. “If it were just a bit less... one-twenty I could probably do. It’d be hard but... Twilight, one-sixty is stretching it.” Twilight had no idea what to respond. She knew that it could be even more... they didn’t know whether the wall they were at right now would lead them straight to the other side. What if they were in a maze? ... and still, what if reaching the other side wouldn’t even help? “Okay, let’s do it. Hop on.” Twilight felt as if she had given up all responsibility, passing it onto Rainbow. The light she cast was now even dimmer than before, in an attempt to preserve every bit of energy she had for the eventual impact. She could see almost nothing, just a blurry line of gray, while Rainbow flew at a speed she could only even judge by the feeling of air against her skin. They didn’t talk anymore; the last thing Twilight wanted was to burden the pegasus further. Every once in awhile, she checked whether teleportation access was still blocked, and every time, the result was the same. Aside from that, there was nothing she could do. Soon, Twilight realized just how long this was going to take. Doing nothing whatsoever for as much as five minutes was already tough. But for hours... and hours.... And hours... Her thoughts drifted, double-checking whether what they had concluded was solid. She couldn’t see any mistakes. Had there been anything else she had missed? Another way to get out? Blocking teleportation was like putting up a fence. It was always local. Even if the place to get out weren’t on the other side, bridging as much distance as possible was their best shot. It seemed like they had to do this. And there had to be a way out. The phoenix wouldn’t have led them there if it was a journey without return. At least, that was what Twilight wanted to believe... but she also knew that if she had gone without Rainbow, she’d have zero chances of making it... and it seemed more than a bit unlikely that he had accounted for that, too. Twilight envied Rainbow Dash. She had no idea how long it had been by now, but she knew she would give everything to be able to fly... or in her case, run. Perhaps she was selfish to even waste a thought on how she felt being carried while their lives were at risk because of her? It was all her fault... or was it? Rainbow had decided to come by herself... the phoenix was the reason why they were here in the first place, not her... right? Twilight pressed her eyelids together. There was no use thinking in that direction. They’d reach the end, and they’d make it out. It would just take a long, long time of her clinging to Rainbow’s back, doing nothing. Time passing in darkness. One-hundred-and-sixty miles. That meant the tower was well over a thousand miles tall... the size of a thousand mountains... Teleportation was still blocked. If Rainbow realized that they wouldn’t make it, would she say something? Perhaps it was better not to ask. It could still be much shorter... Her ears were ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. Twilight pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. Twilight pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were still ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. She pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were ringing. The gray blur. The swooshing of wind. She pressed her eyelids together... She realized she hadn’t checked for a teleportation route in a while. But nothing. Blocked as ever. “I didn’t tell you to confess to him,” Twilight protested. “That was your idea.” “You told me to do this.” “I told you the opposite! I said don’t let all of your happiness depend on it!” “Well, buh-huh.” Fluttershy gave a sly smile. “You don’t get to dictate my happiness, Twily.” “Don’t call me that, please.” “No?” Fluttershy walked over to a bookshelf, pulling one out at random. “Am I not as pretty as your brother?” “What?” Twilight walked over, trying to discern the book’s cover. “Lust?” Fluttershy said. “How come you never asked him, Twilight?” ‘Daring Do and the Towering Mountains.’ “... asked him what?” Fluttershy closed her lips, blowing a silent kiss into the air. “You!” Twilight took the book out of her grasp, furious. “That’s ridiculous! And this is mine! Don’t touch my books!” “I hate Daring Do, anyway,” Fluttershy said. “Did your brother read it to you when you were young?” “This is ridiculous!” Twilight repeated. “He’s my brother! And I’m into mares!” “Hah!” Eagle Eye made. “Mares or not, you haven’t found anypony so far.” Twilight heard a sob. A row behind Eagle Eye, Fluttershy lay under a table. “I don’t care what you think,” Twilight murmured, stepping on top of the row in front of her. There was something written on the board at the end of the classroom, but she couldn’t discern it. She stepped back onto the floor, heading for Fluttershy. “I didn’t know,” she whispered as Twilight got close. “I didn’t know. I’m so sorry. I wouldn’t have bothered you all this time.” “What do you mean?” “I always liked you, Twilight. I thought that one day, we... but...” “Oh.” “I didn’t know. I’m. sorry. But if you like mares, then we’ll never be together...” I’m sorry,” Twilight murmured. “But we should really sit down again. The teacher might notice.” Fluttershy responded something, then Twilight woke up at an instant. “Ohmygoshohmygosh!” she shrieked, her heart racing. “Rainbow!” She could feel the stream of air lessening. Then, she could feel them descent. Only now did she notice Rainbow’s quick, shallow breathing. “I’ve fallen asleep!” Twilight climbed off, still not believing what had happened. “I’ve fallen asleep. I’ve actually fallen asleep. If we had hit something... how long has it been?” No response. Twilight brightened her light. Rainbow was standing beside her, her entire body slick with sweat. She only shook her head. “Oh, yeez! Didn’t you notice? Didn’t the light go out?” Rainbow shook her head again. So she had kept it up during her sleep. Well, that could happen. It had something to do with different parts of the brain and subconsciousness or something. Twilight didn’t remember. How long had she been awake? It was so hard to judge, but her guess was over two hours. And how long had she been asleep? “Long,” Rainbow murmured. “Six hours... maybe.” Six hours. Twilight shuddered. She must have been asleep for over half of it. “How are you?” She asked carefully. “I’m okay,” Rainbow murmured, and Twilight felt a wave of relief. “But I need a break. A real break.” She leaned herself against the wall, slowly sliding downward. “Half an hour... or maybe a bit more... then we can go further.” “How fast do you think you’ve been?” “Fifteen, maybe. It’s... so much harder while carrying... another pony.” Twilight sat down beside her, and Rainbow shifted around, changing into a lying position. She said something too muffled for Twilight to understand. “Uhm, come again?” “You’re my pillow,” Rainbow repeated, resting her head against Twilight’s leg. “Try to be as soft as a cloud, okay?” “Rainbow?” Twilight asked after the time passed seemed to be around an hour – though once more, she couldn’t be certain. “Are you awake?” “I’m now.” “So you got some sleep?” “Slept like four different times. Drifting in and out. Dreamt of... Fluttershy...” “Oh,” Twilight said, “I did, too.” “Did she also raise an army of bears to fight off Chrysalis?” “No.” “I’d have liked to see the end of that one. Would have been... awesome...” Twilight could feel the weight from her body lifting as Rainbow was standing up. She recast her light which she’d been putting out to give her the chance to actually sleep. “What did she do in your dream?” “Uhm. She was really mean and implied I had a crush on my brother. When I told her I’m not even into stallions, she suddenly wasn’t Fluttershy anymore but a filly out of my old class whom I hated. We were also in school now and Fluttershy was lying under the tables a row before us. When I went up to her, she said she’s always liked me, but since she likes stallions and I like mares, we could never be together. Then I woke up.” “Makes sense.” “Yeah.” Twilight was sure that normally, they’d both laugh now. But things were still pretty far from normal. “In another,” Rainbow recited, “I was talking to Rarity and... she said she couldn’t come with us into the tower because the tower wasn’t... in.” “Like, fashionable?” “Yeah. She said it’s summer season now and going in with us would be bad for business.“ “Well,” Twilight said, “if she never came out again, that would be pretty bad for her business.” She didn’t know why she had said that. Something about the tower must have driven her to make this morbid joke. “Yeez, Twilight. Way to ruin the fun.” “Sorry.” “Alright. Hop on.” “If you’ve flown fifteen miles per hour for six hours-” “-we’ve got sixty miles left,” Rainbow completed her sentence. “Yeah, I know. Don’t fall asleep this time,” she added as Twilight climbed on. “Or we might actually crash.” “I’ll try.” Staying awake was easier this time, but the flight was no less monotone, and no less frightening. At one point, Twilight wondered what would happen if something were to attack them. She had stopped being afraid of that, just because it hadn’t happened so far, but that was far from a guarantee that this place was actually empty... given how massive it was, and how little of it they saw, there could be hordes of monsters in here, only waiting for them to get tired... Twilight might tell herself that it was unthinkable for any creature to live inside of this place, but she was past the point where guarantees of this nature were fully convincing. The level of magic that was at work here was so far beyond what she was used to that the only true boundaries still remaining were the fundamental laws of magic, or perhaps not even those. After all, everything had begun with her letter to Celestia, observing that their precious laws were repeatedly being broken... At least so far, the tower hadn’t demonstrated that kind of ability. It had shown enormous power, no doubt, but nothing strictly supernatural. She hoped it would stay that way. Twilight felt as though her vision was getting blurry, even though it was near-impossible to tell. With strained eyes, she kept staring ahead, wondering how Rainbow might feel at the moment. How was this experience for her? How afraid was she? Had she ever asked this much of her own body before? How close was she to total exhaustion? There was one part of their preparations which had seemed a bit silly at the time. Even though they had expected the tower’s insides to be relatively small, and even though they had packed plenty of supplies, Twilight had argued that, just in case, they should make sure to eat a decent meal before going in – and, more importantly, to drink a lot. It had seemed so negligible that she’d almost skipped out on it. Almost. But not quite. Now, it seemed as if that decision might save both of their lives. If they had entered the tower in worse conditions, Rainbow would probably have given up already. Once again, Twilight checked for teleportation access. Nothing. “Your trust in the phoenix seems misplaced,” Rarity’s voice said in her head. “One percent is significant when it comes to your survival.” “You are acting irresponsibly, or dare I say, irrationally?” Rarity had said all that. Had she been right? Had Twilight been irresponsible? Irrational? Foolish? Naive? ... obsessed? She had always felt grateful for Rarity’s pushback. Almost as a way to justify her actions to herself: if she decided to go through despite Rarity’s concerns, surely her decisions must be well-reasoned. Another thing that was irrational at best. Twilight knew her judgment was flawed. It had improved those past months, and as it was so often, that had just made her realize how flawed it was to begin with. But so was Rarity’s. It was so hard to know anything. Teleportation access was still blocked. “Need a break,” Rainbow’s voice reached her. Only then did Twilight realize that the pegasus had already slowed down, merely gliding now, using up their remaining speed. This time, the landing was a bit less smooth than before. Twilight took it as a bad sign. “Exhausted,” Rainbow murmured. “And... thirsty. Thank Celestia... we followed your advice, Twilight.” “It won’t be far anymore,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow nodded, sinking down into a heap near the wall. “Should I wake you again?” “Don’t think I’ll sleep. Not tired. Just... exhausted.” “Okay.” Twilight sat down beside her. “You think about,” Rainbow began, but the rest of her sentence was too quiet for Twilight to understand. “Sorry?” “Do you think about... romance stuff a lot?” “Oh. Um, not really.” “It appeared in your dream.” “It does occasionally,” Twilight said truthfully. “Often in a strange way. Like this last one. I think that’s natural.” “Hasn’t appeared in mine for years.” “You’re not normal.” Rainbow made a sound that was somewhere between a cough and a giggle. “Do you like Fluttershy?” “I don’t think so,” Twilight said, who wasn’t sure why Rainbow had started this topic, or whether she should be concerned. “When I heard it worked out between her and Autumn Leaf, I was a bit envious, but I’m... not attracted to her like that.” “I was really happy for her.” “I’m too.” “Then why be jealous?” “Envious,” Twilight corrected. “I can feel two things at once, Rainbow.” “Okay, but why?” “Uhm, I think I always – well, since I came here at least – imagined that there might one day happen something more between me and... another one of us six... but I rarely thought about it... consciously.” “‘Another one of us six’?” Twilight hesitated. “I guess Fluttershy or Rarity.” “Well,” Rainbow said, “Fluttershy’s taken.” “I know.” “And not into mares.” “I know. Rainbow, are you okay?” For a while, Rainbow didn’t respond. “No.” Twilight looked at her. Her mane had lost all of its elegance, hanging down wet from her face. She herself probably didn’t look much better. “I never want to fly again.” Something changed. They had kept together well so far. Rainbow better than her. Had shouldered the impossible, flown them for all those hours. But now... “Now you’re scaring me.” “I’m so... thirsty, Twilight. You’re not supposed to fly so far without-” “We shouldn’t talk, then,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow said nothing. “You’ve made it so far. That had to have been over two hours. Only thirty miles left... or even less than that.” “Twilight,” Rainbow said, “we both know that’s our wishes talking. For all we know, we’ve flown in a circle.” It had probably been like this before, but Twilight only noticed now that the pegasus’ voice sounded raspier than normal. She could only imagine the sheer amount she had sweat so far, and the thirst would only grow stronger from now on. Rainbow was approaching her limit. If they had flown in a circle, if the remaining distance was anything close to what they had already flown, she wouldn’t make it. Twilight knew it. “But you can-” “Doesn’t matter,” Rainbow murmured. “I’ll try, anyway. Just give me some time.” They flew again. After a while, Twilight began to wonder what they’d do if Rainbow didn’t make it. If the end was too far, or not there at all. Even if they eventually died of thirst, that was still a long way off. Several days, presumably. If the others stuck to the plan and waited three days to do something, perhaps they should try to last as long as possible? There were... ways to prolong life in the face of thirst or hunger. Twilight had never done it, but she knew how it worked in theory. If she was successful, three days should be possible for Rainbow. She herself probably wouldn’t even need it. But what then? There was one thought so morbid that Twilight had so far avoided to think it verbally, even though her mind had already formulated it in its own way. The absolute worst outcome would be for her friends to notify the princess, and for the princess to enter the tower, only to be trapped forever. In that case, Twilight would have done more damage to Equestria than anypony before her. Would Celestia risk it? Probably not. It would not be wise. But Twilight wasn’t sure. ... enough. They would make it out, and if not, Peewee would come after them himself. He owed it to her. Steering her thoughts away, Twilight checked for teleportation access. Blocked. Twilight wondered whether Rainbow was blaming her. She remembered the talk they had had after their initial set of experiments. Rainbow had been wanting to come with her from the get-go. Had been curious. Had wanted to know what was inside. And now, they still didn’t know. Not really. They knew it was massive – far larger than they had anticipated – but they didn’t know if anything was in here. Or... why. What purpose the tower had. How it had come to be. One thing was certain: trapping them so they’d never find out wasn’t a valid explanation. There still needed to be a reason, regardless of whether anyone found out. What a bizarre thought to have. Twilight shuddered. Observing herself, it seemed as if she wasn’t expecting them to make it out anymore. But that was irrational. They hadn’t flown past the point Twilight had calculated yet. On the contrary, they ought to be close now, so their odds should be better, not worse. She checked for teleportation access. Blocked. Twilight only realized what had happened a good second after they were being thrust through the air. The impact had been soft, barely noticeable, her spell propelling them backwards, like a pinball. Rainbow screamed in shock, pressing her wings through to regain balance, while Twilight was overcome with exhaustion. Then everything went dark. Twilight opened her eyes. ... they had hit a wall. Where was Rainbow? Had she left? A surge of panic shot through her heart. For a few seconds, she had no idea what to do, until she realized that she could make light. “Twilight!” Rainbow was standing beside her. A wave of relief. Twilight realized she was lying. She stood up. “How long have I been out?” “Just a few minutes. What happened?” “I overestimated how much force our impact would have. And I underestimated how much energy it would cost. I should have... gone for a much lighter shield. Thank Celestia I didn’t overdo it even more.” “I didn’t know it would bounce us off like that. I thought we would just crash and it wouldn’t hurt as much or something.” “I didn’t know, either,” Twilight said truthfully. “I haven’t used this spell in years.” “Oh.” Then, “doesn’t matter now. So can you-” But Twilight interrupted her. “Look.” At the spot where the wall bent, there was a door-shaped hole. “Twilight,” Rainbow hissed, “can you teleport now or not?” Twilight gulped. Their lives might depend on the answer to this question. But after so many times, how were the odds that it was free here? Closing her eyes, expecting the worst, Twilight checked. ... !!! “It’s free! It’s free!” Rainbow let out a long breath. “Alright,” she said, “then let’s get out of here.” Twilight hesitated. “Twilight! We’ve been here for long enough! Let’s get out while we still can!” Twilight had never felt intimidated by Rainbow Dash before. Not really. But now she did. The fact that her voice was more than a little raspy didn’t help. “Rainbow...” she said cautiously. “Twilight, for Celestia’s sake! Don’t tell me you’re thinking about staying longer! Get us out!” “No!” “What?” “Rainbow, first of all, we can teleport now, alright? It won’t just go away.” “How do you know that?” Twilight wanted to respond, but Rainbow didn’t give her a chance. “This is all freaky, right? Totally out of normal bounds. You don’t know crap!” “Actually no, it’s been following laws quite nicely! It’s just really powerful! But didn’t I tell you in advance how large it would be and-” “Twilight,” Rainbow growled, “we can have this conversation outside! Get us out!” For a few seconds, Twilight didn’t respond, a part of her wondering whether Rainbow would start attacking her. “Rainbow Dash,” she said eventually. “You’ve been amazing. Really amazing. Without you, I wouldn’t have had a chance to make it out. You never blamed me. You reacted great to everything. You were always constructive. But right now, you’re being stupid. And we’re not making stupid decisions. Not when I can avoid it. We’re going to do the smart thing, no matter how much we want to get out of here.” “How is it smart to stay here for longer?” “For one, because I can set up an anchor to teleport us here in the future.” “Why would you-” But Rainbow interrupted herself. When she spoke again, Twilight was relieved to hear that her rush of anger seemed to have receded. “Shouldn’t you have done that earlier?” “Maybe... but probably not. It takes a lot of energy.” “And why would you need it now?” “Because, if we ever decide to come back, it would be nice not to have to fly one-hundred-and-sixty miles only to get back out.” Rainbow sighed. “I want to get out, Twilight. But fine. How long do you need?” “A while. I just overexerted myself. I need to recharge.” “How long is ‘a while?’” “Twenty minutes?” Rainbow groaned. “Twilight, you’re killing me. Fine.” “You don’t seem that exhausted.” Twilight had been pacing around. She sighed. “Rainbow, it’s like exhausting one specific muscle. If you make pushups or whatever. You’ll exhaust your front hooves, but the rest is fine.” “It’s not even like that,” Rainbow murmured, but didn’t say anything else. A few more minutes passed, then she stood up. “Don’t you want to go through there at all?” She made a gesture of the hole. “We shouldn’t go too far away,” Twilight said carefully. “I would be okay with leaving it be for now. It’s probably more of the same. I doubt that we-” She interrupted herself as Rainbow walked over, taking a step through the hole. “Woah!” At once, Twilight got up, rushing next to her. Rainbow was still standing inside the entrance, which was too narrow for more than one pony to fit, and she couldn’t see anything from her current position. “What?” Rainbow took a step back. “See for yourself.” More than a little nervous, Twilight took a step through the hole, immediately realizing what Rainbow had seen. It was bright. At least it was bright for them, with their eyes adjusted to near-total darkness. There was no apparent source of light, but she could still see, and the wall... it wasn’t flat like the part they had been in; instead, there were countless bizarre forms, shapes, whatever protruding out and into the wall. It looked totally chaotic, and totally random. And unnatural. Then she saw something else. Black smoke or... or dust, or something, or a swarm of tiny insects, it was moving through the air dozens of yards away, and everything went back to darkness the moment she stepped back in front of the entrance. “I have no idea what this is,” she whispered, realizing how fast her heart was beating. “Was the black floating thing there when you looked?” “What? No.” Rainbow was making a step towards the entrance, but Twilight immediately held her back. “Don’t!” She had been shrieking it, and yet attempting to keep her voice down as far as possible. “... why?” “It’s moving,” Twilight said. “It could... let’s not risk it. Let’s not risk anything. Let’s stay here, until I can cast the anchor, and then get out as you wanted.” “Couldn’t it also come through here?” Twilight bit her lip. Hard. “I can teleport us out quickly. I won’t just leave without doing the anchor. Let’s just get a bit further back.” In the end, they waited for what felt like half an hour. Twilight wanted to make sure not to pass out again. She lit her horn. She cast the anchor. She could feel it sucking energy out of her, but she was strong enough. Then she focused on the anchor in the library, on the route that was now finally free. They disappeared. “Twilight! Rainbow! Y’all look terrible!” Author's Note This is now this story’s theme song: Chapter 26Author's Note Wow. It’s been a year. And I’m still alive! Yet. Um. My hovercraft is full of eels. Much has happened. Likely to the disadvantage of this story’s reputation. Will it be concluded now? Who knows. The goal is in reach... Chapter 26 Twilight looked at Rainbow. Rainbow looked at Twilight. “You do look terrible,” Rainbow said. “You too.” For a few seconds, nopony said a word, until Rainbow started laughing. Though the situation was hardly funny, Twilight felt an urge to join. She resisted. After a while, Rainbow’s laughing turned into a cough, and without much ado, she dropped herself downward, lying squarely on the library floor. “I thought we were toast, Twilight. I didn’t think we’d make it out of there.” “Why, what happened?” Applejack asked, visibly disturbed. “The place was massive,” Twilight replied. Suddenly, she realized that she had tears in her eyes. “Um... a hundred and sixty miles wide and over a thousand miles tall, if what I calculated is... accurate. Without Rainbow, I’d have never made it out.” “Woah! Did she-” “-fly us all the way?” Rainbow finished her sentence. “You bet.” Twilight swallowed, trying to calm herself. “It was pitch-black the entire time,” she said, and in doing so first realized that it was also dark now. “What time is it?” “Ought to be ‘round one AM by now. Pinkie was waitin’ here ‘till midnight, then I took over.” “One AM... do you think we should just let them sleep, and report in tomo-” “Ponyfeathers, Twilight! No-one’s sleeping! Y’all had us worried sick!” “Okay, okay. But... I really don’t want to go out, and I bet Rainbow doesn’t, either.” “I think they’re all at Pinkie’s place. I can get ‘em.” “Alright.” Twilight let out a long breath. The beating of her heart was loud in her ears. “We’re alive... we’re back...” Applejack gave her a worried glance. “Well... I’ll go get ‘em. See y’all in just a bit.” With a tip of her head, she excused herself. “I wanna take a shower,” Twilight said a while after she was gone. “Rainbow, what about you?” Rainbow raised her head. “You mean together?” “Don’t see why not. They won’t need long.” “So, you were right, Rarity,” Twilight concluded. Just as Applejack had said, the others had all been at Sugarcube Corner, and none of them had been sleeping. It had taken barely ten minutes for all of them to arrive at the library once Applejack had left. “Without Rainbow... I’d have died of exhaustion. Or thirst. We shouldn’t... we shouldn’t have gone in.” “Oh darling!” Rarity rushed forward, drawing Twilight in an unexpected embrace. “I was the one who encouraged everypony not to come! If Rainbow had listened to me, you’d be dead now! Because of me!” “Rarity...” Twilight mouthed, weakly returning the gesture. “That’s such a bad way to see this. If I hadn’t tried to get in in the first place...” “But... but we should have all come with you. Like we usually do.” “Uhm.” Rarity let go of Twilight so both of them could turn towards Fluttershy. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. It sounds like the only reason they made it out is because Rainbow was strong enough to fly them... that far. If we all had come, then... uhm, Rainbow couldn’t have carried all of us, so...” While she spoke, Twilight was reminded of her talk with Rainbow, as she had been at the peak of her exhaustion. Then she realized she had just been hugging Rarity a moment ago. “Fluttershy’s right,” she now said. “And that’s what bothers me. We’ve been lucky. Really, really lucky. And the phoenix wasn’t supposed to put us in a situation where we need luck to make it out.” “Was he really s’pposed to do anythin’?” “I guess not, I just... I thought we’d be... safe.” As Twilight said this, she realized just how true it was. “I trusted him. I trusted Peewee not to put us in real danger. But I was wrong. Clearly.” “Yeah,” Rainbow said after a while, “yeah, you really were. But it’s cool, y’know.” She gave Twilight a friendly poke. “We’ve been lucky before. It always worked out in the end.” “Right,” Twilight murmured. “... so far.” Upon this, no-pony else said a word, until the silence began to feel uncomfortable. “So...” Pinkie Pie eventually asked, “what now?” What now? For the first two weeks after the incident, Twilight had felt no desire to go back. She had made no progress in understanding Peewee, and no preparations for another visit, but neither had she messaged the princess. She had simply put it on hold. Fluttershy was still taking sessions, and they were still very short. Then her brother had gotten married. After two days of dealing with a Cadence that was so very unlike her old foalsitter, Twilight had confronted the other girls about it. None of them had shared her suspicions, but none of them had known how Cadence used to be like. Fluttershy had been the first to suggest that they should cover their grounds regardless, and Rarity the first to agree. Collectively, they had paid Shining and his wife-to-be a visit at the end of that day, planing to stay as long as necessary to talk things out. As a progressively more devastated Twilight had brought up their shared past and memories out of sheer frustration, things had taken a turn which none of them had expected. Twilight had held her own for the better part of ten seconds in an open fight with Queen Chrysalis, and Luna, who had come to their aid almost immediately, for about twice as long. Twilight wasn’t sure how things would have turned out if not for what had come next. Would Celestia, who had only taken another minute to show up, have been able to beat Chrysalis, who, as Luna had later said, must have run on the combined power of dozens of subjects? If not, would Chrysalis have seized control over Canterlot? Would she have attempted to... rule? Imprisoned everypony who would oppose her? Or would she have murdered Celestia and Luna? They would never find out. But whatever had been at stake that day, someone or something had decided it was enough to interfere. Twilight had not even seen it happening; she and Luna had been held down and fully blinded by the changeling queen. But the others had told her. Told her that there had been no fight, no sign of warning, not even a real confrontation. Philomena had simply flown in on Chrysalis, there had been a flash, and Chrysalis lifeless body had hit the ground. Chapter 27Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 1Dear Princess Celestia, I’ve been struggling to find the right words for this letter. Maybe it’s because I’ve never really written you for a reason like this. I’m really nervous. But I’ve already dismissed several tries. I’ll just have to go with this one now, no matter how it turns out. It seems to me that, among the few of us who look far enough into the depths of magic, it is an open secret that what is being taught isn’t quite accurate. It’s close, certainly, but it’s not really true. Salon’s law that models all spells as interactions with the magical plane seems to apply for all but one known species. You know what I am talking about, I’m sure. Phoenixes. They come back from the dead, princess. Surely, we cannot look at this without questioning our understanding of the universe, and of magic foremost. We teach everyone that death is a point of no return, and yet they do return. The only way I see for this to fall in line with what is taught is if the newborn is actually a different creature, and the death of its parent sparks a new life. I don’t have to tell you how unlikely and unintuitive this seems, and it does not even explain their other anomalies. I don’t know if you have reasons for never teaching me about them. I don’t know if there is some kind of unspoken law or pact that prohibits us from researching them. That’s why I’m writing to you, to get clarification on this, so that I know whether I am allowed to take a closer look. Because after what happened, that is what I want to do. Yesterday, as I’m sure you know, the great dragon migration has taken place. After their flight across Ponyville, they have taken temporary residence amidst the Badlands. For the other girls and myself, this was mostly a spectacle, but for Spike, it was his first confrontation with his own kind, and afterwards he was determined to seek them out to satisfy his curiosity. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and I have followed him, and eventually, just as we expected, he was taken aback by their hostile nature, and decided to come home with us. (I didn’t think the risk was that high, as I set up an anchor before departing, and was ready to teleport us back if needed (and did do so, in the end)). However, there are two incidents which happened during the trip that I wanted to tell you about. One is that your latest letter had the unfortunate timing of arriving while Spike was in the company of a group of teenage dragons (I’m sorry, but it was you who encouraged me to deal with similar things based on my own judgment, and I did not see this coming). A bigger dragon took it from him, read a few words, and then threw it away into a pool of lava. I don’t think he has gathered any sensible information from it (if present), but I was unable to read it myself. More importantly, though, is the second point. Apparently, a few dragons had decided to raid a phoenix nest, and they sent Spike to lure the parents away. He did so, and in their absence, the group found the eggs to have already hatched. They were unable to harm the younglings before their parents returned, and thankfully they dealt with the dragons in a peaceful way, even abandoning their nest afterward. However, there seems to have been one egg left, and Spike was the first one to come back and find it. As you can guess, the others immediately told told him to smash it. I shudder to imagine what might have happened if he had done so, but instead he decided to refuse, which was when we evacuated him. Teleporting us all back to Ponyville was harder than it should have been. It was as if we were two ponies more than we actually were, and the egg is the only cause for this that I can think of. Nonetheless, I did manage to do it, on the second try, and we brought the egg to the library. On the same evening, it hatched. Now, there is a phoenix youngling, just a few yards away from me. You can see why I am concerned. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle Chapter 2Dear Twilight, the letter I sent was of negligible importance. It was actually directed at Spike, and was written partly in jest. I foresaw the migration having an effect on him, and tried to nudge you all into talking it through. I did not foresee him running off on a whim, but there is no cause to apologize for what you did. I did encourage you to take decisions into your own hooves, and I am proud that you did. To address the main issue: you are not wrong. Phoenixes are indeed a flaw in our conception of the universe. I shall not reveal to you the reasons for why I didn’t tell you about them, though you can be assured that it was intended on my part. You have been asking for my advice, so here is some. Do not hurt the phoenix. Do not neglect the phoenix. Do not stop the phoenix if she tries to fly away. Do not keep her in a cage. Tell the same to Spike as well as anyone else who watches over her. I know that this is not what you were hoping for, but it is all I will give. Beyond that, I will not tell you what to do. You can attempt to bring the phoenix back to her parents, or you can keep her by your side, as long as she wishes to stay with you. What matters is that you do not force her into doing either. Some of what I know might be of help to you in deciding whether you want to research them further; however, let me emphsize again that I am not giving advice. There is no pact or law that can stop you, but there is reason for caution. We do not know the scope of the phoenixes’ abilities, nor their intelligence or intentions. We do not know how they do magic, and we do not know how they come back from the dead, or why their number isn’t steadily increasing if they are in fact immortal. Everything you decide to do, you will do based on your own judgment. And to answer the question which I’m sure you have: it is no coincidence that I keep a phoenix by my side. But Philomena is not a pet. Were she to leave, I would not dream of stopping her. Oh, there was also a recommendation for Rarity in the lost letter. Tell her to try out “Forgotten Secrets” by Firequill. It is the best romance novel that I have read in the last 100 years, and I suspect she will find it much to her liking. Looking forward to your response, Princess Celestia Twilight’s eyes flickered back upwards as she reached the end of the letter. The part about Peewee had been highlighted, the ink radiating in a blazing red. The princess must have used a spell for that specifically, which was not something Twilight had ever seen done before. Do not keep her in a cage. Well, it was a ‘him’, but they hadn’t been doing that. Do not hurt the phoenix. That much was obvious. Tell that to Spike aswell as anyone else... good, she would do that. Do not stop the phoenix if she tries to fly away. Or in other words, Peewee wasn’t a pet, he was a guest. Do not neglect the phoenix. Only, what did that include? She should ask for a clarification. It was clear that the warning extended beyond Peewee, though, and that she was to take it just as seriously. Dangerous... A shiver ran over her neck as the pieces slowly fell into place, the decision lying before her. Chapter 5Twilight Sparkle, It is because I have been informed of your intentions by my beloved sister that I feel the necessity to share with you the following: I have once had an interaction with a phoenix, and whatever has taken place that day has led to the erasure of all of my memories of the incident, leaving me knowing nothing beyond what I have just written. Alas, there are a great many secrets that could be unveiled by somepony brave and powerful enough to step onto this route. I do not seek to discourage you, merely to advise caution, particularly if you are to come close to that which shapes the very nature of this mysterious species. Respectfully, Princess Luna. Ruler of the Night and the Realm of Dreams PS: I do hope I did not fail on the technicalities of a casual letter. Chapter 6Over the following days, Twilight bore witness to the inevitable effect of the hard-felt issue gradually sliding into the background. The universe did not adjust to her conviction; opportunities did not come knocking at her door, and her life proceeded largely unchanged, with the phoenix issue simply being the nature of her current project. Now, with both royal sisters having inculcated on her the need to be careful, the most sensible course of action was none other than to conduct her research in the most careful way that anypony could conduct research. By reading books. The issue with this plan was of course that there weren’t any books written on phoenixes specifically, but she wouldn’t be Twilight if she let that stop her. Phoenixes were still mentioned in other literature, and so she made it her task to read, or in some cases re-read, the bulk of the history section in the library. For others, this might have seemed like a rather time-expensive and potentially excessive measure, but Twilight knew better. Reading on interesting material was already one of her favorite things to do, so all her current motivation had to do was to add a small additional benefit in order to make it worthwhile. In fact, the somewhat troubling truth was that even the mere illusion of a greater purpose was enough to do so. Even if an excuse to read turned out to be futile in hindsight, she was usually enjoying herself so much in the process that she couldn’t be bothered by it afterwards. Only if she didn’t have a goal at all, then even reading could become boring. This degree of self-awareness might end up being helpful, because so far, her success had been slim at best. A History of Equestria part 2 mentioned a tribe of pegasi joining with a large group of phoenixes as they fled from a region threatened by the legendary war between dragons and griffons, but it didn’t go into any useful details. Part 4 had two instances of an important figure keeping a phoenix as an alleged pet, and part 5 a third. What is driving other species: Griffons, Mules, Dragons, and Sea Serpents, which was an enormous book about the history of those creatures whom the author considered the most intelligent – besides ponies – mentioned phoenixes a couple of times, primarily in how dragons seemed to consider them natural enemies. There was no instance of phoenixes ever fighting back, but the reason the book proposed was simply their lack of intelligence... ... animals just weren’t smart enough to coordinate a counter strike. (The book also touched on the sad nature of dragon culture, with which Twilight wholeheartedly agreed. Despite being at the top of the game as far as intelligence went – close to if not on par with ponies – their recklessness, hostility, and greed made it so that they had never developed any kind of stable society, and behaved more like animals than ponies. Griffons, mules, and particularly sea serpents were all less intelligent and yet more civil.) However, for all the one-sided aggression, there didn’t really seem to be a lot of damage done on the side of the phoenixes, which was probably the single most interesting fact that she had yet discovered. Maybe the incident with Spike had been less close than she had assumed. Or, maybe it had only been dangerous because they had threatened younglings. If Peewee was any indication, then phoenixes grew up very fast. It had only been eight days, this one included, and he was already closer to being full-grown than newborn. Griffons, from what Twilight had gathered, would put phoenixes on the same level as rats or any other animal, but did not actively seek to harm them. Lastly, sea serpents were known for being friendly and pacifist, and there was not a single encounter mentioned in the book. What was of course covered at length was the great war, which had ended with the mysterious death of the great dragon king. However, while ponies had been trying to help negotiating peace since before war even broke out, while sea serpents had tried the same with little success, and while mules had been deliberately absent, there was no mention of phoenixes knowing, or even caring about it. Naturally, because they weren’t intelligent enough. They were just animals. The author hadn’t included them in the title, because they were not considered anything else but a rare kind of animal with an unusually high amount of magical ability. And Twilight might have believed that, were it not for Philomena. It was just anecdotal evidence, but it was real and unfiltered, and she had experienced it first-hoof. Not only had the phoenix actively chosen to stay with Fluttershy, she had actually used her as the object of a joke. A phoenix had performed a joke, through a cognitive action. That was not something animals were capable of. Joking was something sea serpents were hardly capable off, and they were considered the fifth most intelligent species in the world. Anecdotal evidence or not, even a single data point was enough to disprove the theory of phoenixes as mere animals. Such could not be explained away as an anomaly. Plus, erasing a specific part of Luna’s memory was likewise pretty strong evidence for some kind of logical reasoning. Which did then beg the question of why the world still considered them animals. And if that was due to a choice on their part, then Celestia only knew how intelligent they truly were. Or, rather, even Celestia didn’t seem to know. Chapter 12Dear Princess Celestia, I’m writing you because I want to ask if you can tell me more of what you know. I’ve been to my friends for help, and one of them has nudged me into this direction. I must admit now that she has a point. You have been making it clear that you want us to move past the stage where I do things because I have been instructed to. This is the real world, and the issue I’m trying to solve is not part of a task, but it is to add to the knowledge of ponydom. It is for science. And if it is not a game, and if it is about the result, and not the process, then why hide information from me? My heart is beating pretty fast right now. I’m not used to writing to you in this tone. Please let me add that, if you have good reasons, then I’m sorry for pressuring you unfairly, and if you think it is wise not to share those reasons with me, then I understand completely. All I want is for you to confirm that those reasons really exist. (I’ve given Rarity your recommendation, and she has read it in two days. She said it is possibly her new favorite book, or if not then almost, and she asked me to give you her thanks). Your ever faithful student Twilight Chapter 21“You don’t want me to send it?” Twilight might have convinced herself that phoenixes were pure good, but that didn’t stop her from being afraid now. She had done tests with the phoenix, after concluding that he wasn’t intelligent, some even before that, and without asking for his consent – naturally, because he hadn’t been able to give it! Yes Philomena had once made a joke, but fact was that Peewee simply hadn’t shown to understand what was going on! How could she have known? How could he suddenly be sentient? He shook his head. “You can understand me now?” she asked in a whisper. He nodded. “Have you always been able to...” He shook his head. Somewhere inside, Twilight felt relief. This would appear to explain it, as bizarre was it was in its own right. “How?” He shook his head once more, and his left wing twitched in a way which was unmistakably signaling that- “He doesn’t want you to ask.” Twilight’s gaze met Fluttershy’s. “Is he talking to you?” “No, I just wasn’t sure if you- ... I have a lot of experience reading body language.” Twilight nodded. “That makes sense. Keep paying attention.” She turned back to the phoenix. “You don’t want...” She stopped herself, shaking her head. “Do you want me to contact the princess?” she rephrased her question. He shook his head. “Do you want me to tell the other elements?” He... ... nodded. Beside her, Fluttershy gave a small gasp. “Do you know about the tower?” He nodded. “Can we tell anypony else?” Fluttershy chimed in. “Beside the elements.” He shook his head. “Do you want us to... investigate the tower?” Peewee nodded. Suddenly, Twilight had bad feeling, a suspicion, which, if true... She tried asking the question, but her voice was so quiet that she had to try again. “Do you want us to destroy it?” The moment her mouth stopped moving, his eyes stared directly into hers. Twilight wasn’t sure, but she thought his head was moving, giving the faintest idea of a nod, before he tilted it to the side, giving a cry which sounded unlike anything Twilight had heard from him before. “Not yet?” Fluttershy asked, “just investigate for now?” He blinked. Then he nodded. Author's Note I wanted to release the next three chapters today, but I'm not finished working over the third (which has normal length again). Takes a stupidly long time. But it's progressing. Chapter 23“You can,” Rainbow Dash said. “I know a buddy from Cloudsdale who changed her name when she got a big job in global weather control.” “Global?” Rarity asked. “Yeah. There aren’t just local teams like mine, there’s also a group which controls the weather in all of Equestria. That’s why we have to plan out everything at least two weeks in advance, so we can run it by them first.” “I didn’t know that,” Twilight chimed in. “They can’t possibly-” “Looks like books don’t know everything after all!” Rainbow interrupted her, sticking out her tongue in mid walk. Pinkie Pie giggled. “Rainbow Dash... you know that I haven’t actually read every book there is, right?” “Meh.” “So how can they manage every single weather team? That sounds like a lot to organize.” Rainbow shrugged. “We usually get broad instructions, like ‘four to six rainfalls’ and then we can do the rest as we want. We have to run it back by them, but they never complain. Who knows if they even read it.” “And how do you-” “Should we go in here?” Fluttershy interrupted her, causing everyone to halt. Twilight turned her head. They were indeed standing beside what looked like a restaurant, albeit a very small one, with just two tables situated outside the place. One of them was empty, and on the other, Thunderlane was sitting with some pegasus mare she didn’t recognize. “‘The Lunar Commander’,” Applejack read aloud from the sign hanging on top of the entrance. “Can’t say I’ve been here before.” “I have,” Rarity said. “They have great mushrooms.” “And we have a nice view,” Fluttershy added, pointing towards Town Hall, were a group of foals could be seen playing tag. “But do we even fit around that?” Twilight gave the empty table a skeptical glance. There was a cushioned bench on the side of the restaurant’s wall, along with three comfortable-looking chairs positioned around it, but it seemed like it was intended for five ponies at most. “We’ll just have to sit tight!” Pinkie exclaimed, giggling, whether at her wordplay or at random Twilight wasn’t sure. With a few bounces she made for the bench, dropping down. “Who wants to sit next to me?” “I do,” Fluttershy said immediately. “I really like watching foals play,” she added with a smile after taking her seat. This apparently settled it, and as everyone took their seat, Twilight ended up at the third spot on the couch on Pinkie’s other side. There was now indeed very little space left between them. “Only four menus,” Rarity observed, picking up the items in question. “We’ll just need one.” Twilight took one of the articles in her magic, levitating it so that she and both ponies next to her could take a look. “Rarity, what was that mushroom dish you liked?” “One moment... ah, here it is. Item fourteen.” Twilight flipped a page, giving it a brief look. “I’ll take that one.” “Me too,” Fluttershy agreed, but Pinkie Pie made a face. “I don’t like mushrooms. Can you go to the desserts?” “You ain’t really gonna order just cake, are you, Pinkie?” “Hehe... I like to see how other ponies bake things!” “Just a professional interest?” Fluttershy asked, causing a series of laughs from the group. A bit more chatter followed, though Twilight soon stopped paying attention, her mind wandering back to the tower. It was such an incredible thing. A structure evading even the princess’ gaze. That was, unless Celestia did know about it and just didn’t want to tell her. But that was unlikely... she seemed to have been quite open with her, even sharing some of her own fears. She barely noticed the waiter approaching, a good-looking unicorn with a blue coat and a short, silver mane. “Have the ladies chosen yet?” “Yes,” Rarity said, “we’d like the champion plate three times, please, both the strawberry and the apple pie – not for dessert, but along the main course – the hay fries once, and I will take the big mixed salad, item three. As for drinks...” “I’ll take the cider,” Rainbow Dash said. “Still water for me,” Twilight murmured absently. “I want the chocolate milk!” “The apple juice for me.” “Uhm. Also a glass of apple juice for me, please.” “And I will have the blackcurrant juice, if you will,” Rarity concluded. “Honestly, Rainbow,” she added once the waiter had disappeared, “do you have any ability or interest to distinguish good and bad food?” “I know I can distinguish good from bad hay fries! You think it tastes the same when you eat it at home?” “She’s hopeless,” Applejack whispered to the fashion designer, though loud enough for everypony to understand. If they really entered... what would they find? What would they find? There was something in there. Something was inside that tower. Sooner or later, she’d find out what it was. While she was still musing the tower, a thought from earlier came bubbling up from the depths of her mind. She distinctly remembered thinking “I now work for him,” as Pewee had overseen her first set of experiments. But did she really? Peewee had never taken the initiative. He hadn’t found her; she’d found him. Had confronted him. Had connected to him. And yet, was now doing what it seemed like he wanted... The problem was this: if examining the tower was what the phoenix really wanted, then why hadn’t he done more to get her here? Sure, it had worked out for him – at least so far – but only because her curiosity had done the entire work. If he had just talked to her earlier, he could have made sure... This, then, brought her back to the question of his intelligence. Her research had found that phoenixes were generally considered animals, but the single fact that she had witnessed Philomena doing a joke had led her not to believe it. Now she had confirmation. What Peewee had done was – She snapped out of her thoughts as she heard Rarity say her name. “–to make you actually go in there.” “Sorry, can you say that again?” Twilight asked. Pinkie snickered. “Told you she was totally spaced out!” “Rainbow said she’d like to see what’s in the tower,” Rarity explained, “and I pointed out that you’ll probably try to make her go in there. Won’t you?” “Oh. Uh, didn’t we just have this discussion earlier? I do want us to go in there, but I won’t force anyone, like I said.” “Yes...” Rarity sounded reluctant. “... yes, we did. But you know, darling, you...” She stopped. “Yes?” Twilight asked as the silence began to stretch on. “I have nothing new to say, I suppose,” Rarity murmured. “Girls, what do you think? This isn’t just a matter between Twilight and me. If Twilight does find an entrance, will you try to get inside?” “I can’t even see it,” Rainbow was first to respond. “If I did go in there, wouldn’t it just, well... like, still be nothing?” “I can’t say for sure...” Twilight let her gaze bounce between Rarity and Rainbow. “... because the tower might be doing things in an... err, in a different way, but if a unicorn cast this spell, then it almost certainly wouldn’t work anymore once you’re actually inside. So-” “You mean I’d see everything once I’m in?” Twilight nodded. “Probably.” “Sweet...” Rainbow licked her lips. “Rarity, aren’t you also curious?” “Well, I suppose I am, but not enough.” “Come on! We’ve beaten Nightmare Moon and Discord and you’ve made it out of a dirt hole full of giant dogs all by yourself! What are you so afraid of?” “It seems there won’t be any need for Twilight to convince you after all.” But Rainbow kept watching the fashionista with a raised eyebrow, who clearly hadn’t actually answered the question. “There’s some reason to be afraid,” Twilight came to her help. “Like I said, this invisibility stuff is really impressive. If the tower wanted to hurt everyone going inside, well, it probably could.” “But you don’t think that will happen,” Fluttershy asked, “because...?” “I trust Peewee. So far that has worked.” “And that’s what I take issue with!” Rarity insisted. “Your trust in this... in Peewee seems misplaced, or dare I say: irrational.” “Mh,” Twilight just made, trying to consider the possibility that Rarity was actually right. It was indicative that she couldn’t quite articulate why she was so sure of her position. “Ain’t we just treadin’ old water, now?” “Perhaps so. But I am worried that Twilight will lead you to do something dangerous, so the least she should do is explain everypony what for.” “I can’t tell you what for,” Twilight said slowly. “I don’t know what inspecting the tower will do anymore than you. Or what’s inside. I can try to explain why I trust Peewee as much as I do.” Rarity nodded. “Please.” “Well – he’s a phoenix, for one. I know there are some exceptions, but on the whole, creatures which look friendly to us also tend to be friendly. Take ponies, sea serpents, uhm... mules... and compare that to dragons, griffons, manticores, timber wolves...” “Diamond dogs!” Rainbow chimed in. “Very few dangerous animals look friendly,” Fluttershy confirmed. “The only real exception are nymphs. Though there are a few species which look scary but are still friendly, like... I’d say manticores, actually. And zebras, and-” “Zebras don’t look scary!” Pinkie Pie protested. “What?” Rainbow gave her a disbelieving look. “Weren’t you the one who wrote that song about Zecora when we first met her? About her being an evil, err...” “Enchantress,” Rarity said. “Right.” “Right,” Twilight echoed. “But that’s not the only reason. We know that they aren’t animals, now. Peewee has talked to me and there’s still the thing with Philomena pulling a prank on Fluttershy. And... and I think they killed the dragon king.” “What?” Rainbow asked, while at the same time, Fluttershy took a sharp breath. “A-are you serious, Twilight?” “Hold on,” Applejack interrupted her. “Somepony’s gotta explain what yer talkin’ about.” “Two-hundred years ago,” Rarity began before Twilight could, “there was a war between griffons and dragons. They say it started when a young dragon took her resting place too close to a griffon village. The griffons wanted her gone, and when she refused, they sent a small group to push her out by force. In the resulting confrontation, two of the griffons were killed. Burnt alive. The remaining ones reacted by mobilizing half the village, and the dragon was murdered on the same day.” “This is well-documented,” Twilight chimed in. “Not just some tale ponies made up or exaggerated. As far as I know, it all happened like that, except that only one of the griffons was burnt, the other took a claw to the chest and died on the retreat. Err... anyway. Go on?” Rarity nodded. “The dragons did not react well. They are an immensely proud race, the murder of one of their own, even after what she had done, was not something they were willing to take without consequence. The dragon king declared that everyone who took part in the incident – and that meant several dozen griffons – was to be executed, only then would there be peace. Naturally, the griffons refused. What resulted are the most bloody months in Equestrian history thus far.” “Griffons outnumbered them fifty to one,” Twilight added quietly, “but a fully grown dragon is far stronger than any griffon. They were matched almost evenly, which just made things worse.” “But why didn’t Celestia put an end to it?” Applejack asked. “If it was between any other two species, she probably would have,” Twilight responded, her voice now barely more than a whisper. “But dragons are strong. Remember how Spike always says it’s hard for me to do magic tricks on him because he’s a dragon? He’s right. Dragons have a natural resistance to unicorn magic, and that only grows as they grow. I don’t doubt that Celestia could deal with a single dragon, but she can’t force her will on all of them. She tried her best to negotiate peace, though.” “Without success,” Rarity added. “And then the dragon king died,” said Fluttershy. “Precisely,” said Rarity. “But wait,” Rainbow protested, “why did that end the war? Wouldn’t that-” “Ahem,” Applejack made, giving a nod to the approaching waiter. “Blackcurrant juice for you, Miss Rarity. Water for you, Miss. Twilight...” He gave three more drinks out without commenting. “... and the second apple juice for you, Miss Applejack.” Everypony murmured their ‘thank you’s, and as soon as he was out of ear range, Rainbow continued. “So I don’t get it. Wouldn’t murdering the dragon king just make the remaining dragons more angry, and make things worse? He was murdered, right?” “He was,” Rarity said, quickly cutting herself off to leave space to Fluttershy, who had started responding at the same time. “Dragons have a very unique sense of pride and moral,” she explained. ”You might think they’d want revenge, but actually they considered the war to be lost and settled as their king died. He was the one who had declared it in the first place.” “Murdering one dragon was what started the war, but murdering another put an end to it?” Applejack asked disbelievingly. “Yep,” Twilight confirmed. “And it was just about the only thing that would have done the trick. Peace negotiations hadn’t been working at all, because whenever there was a tiny bit of progress, it got squandered once the next fight broke out. And there were fights all the time.” There was a pause, during which Rarity took a sip of her drink, then asked: “You think phoenixes did it. Why?” “It fits the evidence. There is no plausible explanation of how else he died. He was found dead right in the great cave of Svyrrdan, apparently after lying with his mate. It’s close to impossible for griffons to have snuck in there unnoticed, and how would you even do it? It’s extremely difficult to poison a dragon. You’d need a zebraharian shaman, about as good as Zecora, who’s willing to brew a deadly potion, and then you’d have to get it past at least a dozen dragons, and even that shouldn’t have worked so smoothly. I can’t imagine any potion...” But, throwing another look at Pinkie Pie, she stopped herself. It was unnecessary to go into more detail. “Perhaps Celestia did it?” Rarity suggested. “Somehow?” “She once told me she didn’t know what happened.” “Maybe she lied. Doesn’t sound like something you’d tell your student.” It was Rainbow who had said that, and it was probably the second best explanation. Phoenixes aside, Celestia might have been the only player on the board who was capable of murdering such a powerful foe in such a clean way. And while any sentence with both ’murder’ and ’Celestia’ in it sounded absurd, the circumstances had been truly extraordinary. Her gut said no, but she couldn’t be sure. “Could be,” she admitted. “But it could also have been phoenixes. They erased Luna’s memory. If they can do that, they can probably also murder a five-thousand year old dragon without anyone knowing how. At least it’s more likely than that griffons did it, or any other species.” “Okay,” Fluttershy now said, “but why does that make you trust Peewee more?” “It probably did save dozens of lives,” Rainbow Dash pointed out. “Thousands,” Fluttershy corrected her. “Uhm, but still. I don’t see how...” “That war was the worst thing,” Twilight said, “that ever happened in Equestria. Ever. Over a quarter of all dragons and almost a third of all griffons lost their lives. And that one death ended it all. Come on, girls! If they did it, I’m convinced it was the right thing.” She threw an expectant look around, but no nopony, not even Applejack, took the chance to disagree with her. “We might not be sitting here if it hadn’t ended that day,” Fluttershy whispered. “I, um, I don’t mean we wouldn’t be alive, but if those two species had driven each other to extinction, Equestria wouldn’t look the same way it does now. But still, I don’t see why-” “Is it so crazy of me to think they’re watching over us? Given everything?” “Us?” Pinkie Pie asked. “Ponies. Griffons. Even dragons. Maybe every sentient species. Maybe every living creature. Our history... of Equestria... it’s extraordinarily peaceful. We know so little about lands outside, but... they aren’t like that.” Nopony spoke after that. Twilight could feel it too: the unrest that always came with thinking about the land outside of Equestria. Regions that few ponies had ever laid eyes on... and that neither included her nor any of the others... at least not as far as she knew. “I think I understand you better now,” Rarity said eventually. “But darling, all of this is speculation.” Applejack and Fluttershy murmured in agreement. “Yeah,” Twilight admitted, “I know.” “Anyway,” Rainbow said after a short pause, “I’m going in there.” “The tower?” Pinkie asked. “Yeah. I wanna know what’s in there.” And that settled it. Rarity didn’t say anything, and soon the conversation shifted to the elements of harmony, and from there to Applebloom and Sweetie Belle’s struggle with Diamond Tiara. Then their food came, and they began a discussion about restaurants and Rarity’s new fashion line and eventually about Thunderlane. But everyone knew that at least Rainbow Dash and her would soon try to get inside the tower. And Twilight still hadn’t notified Celestia. Author's Note The planning fallacy is the fallacy to think humans can plan. This is wrong. Chapter 28“... if we had some way of extending a pony’s endurance, that might be extremely valuable for us. Something that would allow somepony to go on, beyond her normal limits. If you could do that, I promise that we would only use it in case of an emergency.” Twilight took a breath, deciding to leave it at that. “Can you help us with that, Zecora?” Perhaps she was imagining it, but the zebra’s eyes seemed narrower than normal. Twilight also noticed that she threw a look at one of her shelves before she responded. “What you ask truly puts my skills to the test – it’s been long since I’ve heard such a request. I do have to ask, before I say more, just what do you need such a potion for?” “I can’t tell you. I’m sorry. But I can promise that it’s not to hurt anyone. Um...” She gave herself a push. “A few weeks ago, Rainbow Dash nearly died from exhaustion. We’re hoping to avoid it, but we might run into a similar situation... again. In that case, having such a potion might save her life. That’s the only way we would use it. ... Do you trust me, Zecora?” “... I got her to agree, but she said she needs some ingredients which she doesn’t have in stock. Do you think you can get those...?” With a slight frown, Rarity took the paper Twilight offered into her telekinesis. Her frown deepened as her eyes went down the list, which only consisted of four items. “Digestive juice of a hydra,” she read. “...” She gave Twilight a blank stare. “Zecora said that’s the key ingredient. It’s definitely necessary.” Rarity shook her head, looking back at the list. “I could get the other ones, I suppose, but whether any store even has this-” “It’s not unheard of in potion making. It should exist somewhere in Canterlot.” Rarity nodded slowly. “Very well then, I will see what I can do.” “If you can’t get that one,” Twilight added, “don’t bother with the rest.” “I see. Ahem – if I may – why are you asking me of all ponies?” “I thought you’d be the best mare for the job,” Twilight simply said, which was the truth. “But if you don’t want to do it-” “I said no such thing. I will help you, I’m just wondering – I suppose I see why you aren’t asking the princess directly, but what about your brother?” “Mh...” Twilight made. “Um. ... Well, I could ask Shining, but, he... I think he’d find the request... weird. He’s good in dealing with royalty and stuff – you know, with that kind of culture – but the alchemy scene is a lot more shady, from what I know. ... plus, he did kinda just have his wife replaced by an evil changeling queen without noticing.” “I... see.” Rarity gave a light cough and a smirk. “Alright then, darling, say no more – I shall do my best to get your digestive juice. ... that is, do say more, because I think there is still an unanswered prerequisite for me acquiring this item.” “I have money.” With a click, the saddle bag she had brought opened up, revealing an inconspicuous-looking bag. “This is probably way more than you’ll need, so I’ll trust you to be economical.” “May I?” Twilight nodded, and Rarity untied the rope, but not without throwing a look around first, as if she were afraid that somepony was peeking through a window. Twilight had, of course, chosen a time where the boutique was not opened to customers. Her eyes widened as she revealed the bag’s contents. Hastily, she tied it back up, but kept it hovering beside her for a few additional moments, during which her gaze slowly trailed the room. “Could you give me a moment, dear, so I can put this into an adequate place? Ahm, if I say ‘adequate’, I mean ‘one Sweetie Belle won’t be looking at’.” Twilight nodded, and Rarity disappeared, taking the bag with her. “Not to be intrusive,” she said as she returned, “but where do you have this many bits from?” “Celestia has given me more than I need, every month, for twelve years. I just put it aside.” Rarity didn’t ask how much, even though Twilight wouldn’t have minded sharing the number. It wasn’t that high; the reason why her savings had grown to this amount was just what she had said: twelve years was a long time. “You can spend some of it, by the way,” she added. “I don’t mind if you book a nice hotel for your stay. Just be reasonable.” Rarity gave an earnest nod. “I will. You have my word.” Then she took a deep breath. “Your decision is made?” Twilight nodded. “I have to do what they want. I have to. After Canterlot, I...” “‘They’? Who are ‘they’?” “They. The... phoenixes. The... thing.” “The thing?” Rarity echoed. “What thing?” “I... I... look. Look. You know how they do what we want? You focus on something, and they do it for you? As long as you don’t verbalize it?” “Yes. That was the result of the experiments you did. You told us about them.” “Right. Well, that doesn’t fit with killing Chrysalis, does it? Or the dragon king?” “Which is still just a theory.” “Yes, but I would bet all the money I just gave you that it happened. I’ve gone over the history books. The dragon king wasn’t just big and powerful, he was actually smart. And he had built a fortress – you should read up on it, it’s impressive. Anyway, it was secure. It was really, really secure. And he was murdered, just like that. You have to bend over backward to explain it in any other way. But...” She took a moment to order her thoughts. “...you’re right – I don’t know that it’s true, so it’s wrong to count it as evidence. That’s basic science. But you know what else is basic science? A theory is good if it makes correct predictions. Before things happen. And that’s what my theory did. What happened to Chrysalis is exactly the kind of thing that I think happened to the dragon king. You were there. You actually saw it, unlike me.” “Yes, I did. What’s your point, Twilight?” “My point – I was getting to that. Hold on. I did more experiments since. To test my ‘phoenixes are intrinsically good’ theory. What if I tried to get Peewee to do something bad? Like, drop a rock on somepony? Well, I tried that.” “And?” “And he did. I had him drop a small rock on Rainbow Dash, who volunteered. But, of course, she just dodged it. So I tried it while she was napping. She actually agreed to that, too. And he also did it. But, again, it didn’t really hit her, because I was right there, and after I saw that Peewee complied, I caught the thing before it hit her. Well, for a while, that was it. The experiment was a success, it falsified the hypothesis. Except... well, not really. Because it wasn’t actually hurting anypony, right? I was always going to catch the rock before it hits Rainbow. So I still hadn’t done the real test. Well, you can guess where this is going. First, I chose somepony who wasn’t volunteering – which is wrong, I know, but I had no choice! It had to be wrong in order to work! ... second, I got one of these things that you can wrap around your horn that suppresses your magic. I put it on, got to my subject while she was asleep, not knowing anything, and I wished as hard as I could that Peewee would drop that damn rock on her head-” “-and he didn’t do it,” Rarity finished for her. “Yup. Of course,” she added, “it wasn’t big enough to really be dangerous. But it would have hurt. That seems to have been enough.” “I see...” Rarity’s gaze flickered a bit, then her body seemed to straighten. “Well,” she said, “I don’t believe I disagree with you anymore. You seem to have been on the right track all along. I’m, ah, sorry for doubting you.” “What?” Twilight said reflectively. “Rarity, don’t apologize for that! You questioning me has been helpful. I should have to justify myself if I do risky things. Besides, things could have gone differently. Remember when you got me to get help from another mare before contacting Peewee for the first time? That was me being reckless and you being responsible. And that it turned out to be fine doesn’t change that.” Rarity nodded, accepting the compliment. “Well then, this proves they are good at heart. Or, perhaps, ‘prove’ is too strong a term, but it certainly is a hint. Although... I suppose we can’t rule out the possibility that he merely tricked you.” Twilight nodded. “It’s possible... I don’t believe it.” “Why not?” “Maybe I’m naive,” Twilight said vaguely, “but I don’t think they are even capable of lying. Peewee only talked to me after we discovered the tower. And Philomena never really did anything, not until Luna and I were beaten by Chrysalis. It seems like they aren’t intelligent, most of the time, only when it’s important, really important, something changes. Usually, they just do what the ponies around them want.” “Alright,” Rarity said, “just give me the full picture. What do you believe, at this point?” “One of the first things Celestia wrote to me was that the difference between a phoenix and an alicorn is greater than the difference between an alicorn and a fly,” Twilight began, her tone making it rather clear that she had an answer prepared. “By every metric we have – granted, most of them aren’t good, but still – they are so much more magical than any other creature, it’s absurd. And magic does this thing that no-one understands, where if you put enough energy into it, it just gets creative, by itself. I think phoenixes have so much magic that their magic just takes over sometimes. Maybe it’s literally taking control of them. Maybe it makes them smarter for a short amount of time. Maybe what it’s like to be a phoenix is what it’s like to be dreaming. Maybe when they get smarter, that’s when they wake up. I don’t know how it works, but what I’m saying is just that they so different, just so different, that we shouldn’t expect them to even know what deception is until we do. But also...” Twilight made a pause, and when she continued, there was far more tension in her voice. “... we don’t know what the tower is, right? But whatever it is, it’s important enough that he told me to destroy it. Well, and the phoenixes killed the dragon king, I think, and they killed Chrysalis, presumably both for the greater good. If that’s how they think... or operate... then, well...” “But if you’re dead,” Rarity responded quietly, “you can’t help them anymore.” “Yeah. If he kills Rainbow or me, that won’t make us go back in there. But...” She looked up in time to see Rarity’s eyes widen. “... it would work, you know?” she whispered. “If Fluttershy were dead tomorrow, it would make me hate him, sure, but I would go back into the tower. What else could I do? It’s like you said. A one percent chance isn’t small when it comes to one of our lives.” Rarity nodded slowly. “Well,” she eventually said, “good luck, dear.” “Thanks.” For a while, none of them said anything. Then, Rarity cleared her throat. “Out of curiosity... whom did you do the experiment with? The one where you couldn’t ask for permission?” “Oh. Applejack.” Twilight gave a sheepish smile and a shrug. “She always takes naps under trees...” “We are going,” Twilight said to Peewee, who of course showed no intention of responding. “See here,” she nonetheless continued, summoning a rolled-up scroll from her desk. “This is my checklist. We weren’t so well prepared last time, clearly, but this time, we’re taking things up a notch.” Most importantly, they’d actually have their luggage this time, she added to herself. At least she was optimistic that her plans regarding this obstacle would prove to be effective. “Section one,” she began, reading from the top of the list, “water, food. Section two. Compass. Will a compass work?” That was a question which she had asked herself several times by now and which her understanding of borrowed space didn’t answer. As of now, her best guess was ‘probably not.’ But it certainly was worth a try. “Candles. Lighter. Spare lighter, in case the lighter stops working. Charged crystals. Red marker. Spare red marker. Blue marker. Spare blue marker.” Whether they’d be bold enough to actually use those, she didn’t know. “Section three. Sleeping pills, anti-sleeping pills. Painkillers. Section four. Phial of dragon fire. Yeah, I actually own one of those. Pretty great, isn’t it? Owe Cadence for that one...” Her voice trailed off as she thought back to how she had acquired this particular item, so many years ago. “... and Zecora’s potion.” What they had cut from last time where clothes, they took too much space, and for all of its problems, the tower really hadn’t been cold. “What do you think? Did we forget something? I hope not.” Peewee sat still on her desk, not responding. Twilight focused on the wish that he would come and take a look at her list, causing him to flap his wings and fly over to sit down onto her shoulder, having a clear view of what she had written – of course, presumably without comprehending it. “See?” she murmured nonetheless, a chill running down her spine. “We’re going for it.” She took a deep breath, rolling the list back together. “So don’t kill Rarity, alright?” Dear Diary, this isn’t right. None of the girls has noticed how afraid I am, but here it is. I don’t even keep a diary. Why I am telling you this? Who am I telling this? Myself? This is stupid. I’m going to burn this once I’m done. Maybe. I don’t tend to remember my dreams. But now I do. It visits me every night in my sleep. It’s started a few days after Canterlot. No one should see the swarm. I don’t care if this is the least scientific thing I’ve ever said. No one should see the swarm. This is not normal. This is not okay. It scared me when I saw it, but not like this. It was fine afterward. Before Canterlot, everything was okay. And then the nightmares have come. You know how life gets smaller when you grow older? You begin to understand things and that’s how everything shrinks. A trip isn’t an adventure anymore, it’s a thing you plan and then do and then it’s over. Days are 24 hours long and you always have a sense of where you are. This is gone. All of my safety is gone. The princess isn’t in on this. She has no clue what is in the tower. Probably not even that the tower exists. Maybe it was a mistake to write this down. It doesn’t seem to help. I don’t know. Is there life beyond the plane? On a different plane, with a different sun and moon? Another species? So far away that we will never see each other? And if they are, are phoenixes there, too? Is there a tower like this one? Are they magic itself? Are they the reason Equestria exists? Did they create Celestia and Luna? Did they create life on the plane? DId they create the plane itself? Did they create the sun and moon? A few nights ago I dreamt that I was trapped on the moon. Not metaphorically, not asleep, but actually trapped, alone and afraid and cold and there was the SWARM. The SWARM from the tower. the SWARM and it still looked kind of like dust and kind of like insects. and it lasted so long it’s not normal for dreams to be this long. and I woke up and I was still afraid after that. you know that the word nightmare comes from princess Luna? she is the nightmare. she was the mare who visited ponies’ dreams at night. but she wasn’t there. why not? i know she pays more attention to us six than most ponies. i’ve never had a scarier dream in my life and she wasn’t there. the dreams should have spoiled the secret. also it’s her moon that the tower is borrowing from but I know that this has nothing to do with Luna. I would bet my life on it right now that Luna has no idea the tower exists. this is not Nightmare Moons doing. Nightmare Moon wanted to keep Equestria in eternal night and rule. not drive her subjects into insanity. the SWARM is unnatural, it is something that does not belong here. it is so much scarier than Nightmare Moon or Chrysalis or Discord. it all feels like child’s play now. maybe it was all childs play, if we are the children and the phoenixes are out there making sure that we don’t do anything too stupid. and if we do than they go fix it. the phoenixes could kill Discord in a heartbeat if they wanted to. I know they could. but they didn’t and that means that he wasn’t important enough. the being who beat both princesses and could play with the sun and moon like toys wasn’t worth it. why should he be, we dealt with him in a day. but the tower is. the tower is real. the tower matters. I have no idea why the phoenix needs us to help but so it is. the phoenix wants the tower dead. and the SWARM. it must want the SWARM dead too. I don’t know how but it does. I’m going to take this letter out and burn it and then take a sleeping pill. Chapter 3Dear Princess Celestia, Thank you. I’ve thought a lot about this. I can’t close my eyes from this mystery. I want to know. I don’t believe they are evil creatures. They did not harm the dragons, even after they sought to damage, perhaps kill the younglings. What little I’ve read also doesn’t point in that direction. I will be careful, though. More careful than I’ve ever been for any project. Can you explain what you meant by “don’t neglect the phoenix”? Twilight PS: The phoenix is a ‘he’. Spike has named him Peewee. Chapter 4Dear Twilight, that is a truly terrible name. Tell Spike I am gravely disappointed. On a more serious note – no, I don’t believe phoenixes are ill-willed any more than you or I. However, remember that good intentions, even on both sides, are no guarantee for a positive outcome, as mere difference can be enough to cause harm. This is true for difference in behavior, but it is even more true for difference in magical composition. If there is another civilization out there, far beyond the known land, and if you were to meet a creature from that civilization, the difference between you two alone could be enough to cause any possible outcome. With bad luck, either or both of you could die immediately. Of all the species in Equestria (and beyond), phoenixes are the one which comes the closest to that foreign creature. The difference between a phoenix and an alicorn, in terms of magical composition, is larger than that of an alicorn and a fly. I will therefore repeat again, even after you already promised it: be careful. Be careful in interacting with them, but be even more careful if you manage to get close to their defining magic. And know that I write this because I worry about you, and that I am every bit as worried as I am proud. Princess Celestia PS: What I meant by not neglecting him is rather straightforward. Offer him food and a place to sleep. Nuts and fruits are a safe call, otherwise anything that ponies eat should be to his liking.
Chapter 7The information in the remaining books had been even more sparse. The History of Canterlot portrayed phoenixes as a creature of wonder, and “owning” one as as the penultimate symbol of status. (Twilight had taken the book out of the library’s catalog after her read; surely there were other books that did a better job in re-telling the history of the world’s capital, and she had already written a letter to the Royal Library, asking them to send one.) The Magic in Nature: A force through the ages reallyought to have at least a section about them, but Twilight had been disappointed. The book had merely noted that little was known, and that many of their powers “remained unexplained”. Both of those things were definitively true, but it was also unhelpful, and odd considering the fairly detailed information that the book provided about many other species. Perhaps that circumstance was by itself important. It did, however, have one piece of information that did seem to carry relevance, which was an observation of how phoenixes seemed to “rarely be affected” by tragedies that had befallen other species, ponies included. And lastly, Greed and Deception: The role of Money in the Griffon culture had been an excellent and highly interesting read that sadly didn’t mention phoenixes at all, but was still something she’d recommend to anyone who wanted to learn about Griffons. Twilight sighed as she looked over the page whereon she had just written every noticeable find. It was a depressingly short list. And if the incident with Philomena had not taken place, then her conclusions now would look radically different, which was not a good sign for their reliability. Perhaps... Was this the wrong approach? No, that was silly. Obviously, reading about them first was the correct approach. But was it time to change it up with something else? She was beginning to think of phoenixes more and more as a riddle, and you didn’t solve a riddle by reading. You solved a riddle by thinking. For which you needed to be smart... ... or, perhaps... Sometimes, riddles were not solved by the smartest ponies, and sometimes, the same pony would be stuck on a riddle on one day, but be able to solve it on the next. A big factor was variance, or, to put it more bluntly, luck. Perhaps, if she just asked somepony else, that pony would know the solution immediately.
Chapter 8“Twilight.” Rarity held the door to the boutique open, giving Twilight a curious glance. “What brings you here?” “Hey. Uhm... I need your help with something.” Rarity raised an eyebrow, maybe expecting her to elaborate, but then just shrugged and stepped aside. “Of course. Come in.” Twilight nodded. “I tried to reach you yesterday,” she said, closing the door behind her, “but you weren’t home.” “Ah, yes. I was out.” “Out?” “At a bar. Do you want tea?” “I...” Twilight produced a small box. “... brought some, actually.” She floated it over. “You want to try?” “Certainly.” Rarity took the box in her telekinesis, turning it around. “Seventy degrees, two and a half minutes, one tablespoon per cup,” Twilight instructed. Rarity nodded, and began to put on water. “This is delicious.” “Thanks.” “This, ah.” Rarity took another sip. “This might be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” “It probably is the best thing I’ve ever tasted,” Twilight said truthfully. “It’s a shame that I don’t have more.” “How-” “From Zecora. I helped her with a really tricky spell a couple of weeks ago. She said this was from her homeland, and that she didn’t have a lot of it left herself.” “I see. A rare gift, then. Do you know what it is?” “Only that half of it is ordinary Sencha. The rest, Zecora said it’s a secret. But even if we knew, I don’t think the plants would grow around here.” “A shame.” Rarity brought the cup to her lips once more, closing her eyes at the taste. “Mhhhh... heavenly. Well then.” She put it back down. “With such a wonderful gift, you have earned my full attention. How can I help you?” “Well...” And Twilight told her everything that had led up to this point, starting with her initial letter. She had almost forgotten that Rarity had helped rescuing the egg in the first place, so the fact that she even had this opportunity was partially her doing. When she was done, she asked if Rarity saw something obvious she had missed, either something about phoenixes themselves, or just something she could do to find out more. Rarity made a number of remarks that made sense, but were all things she had already thought of herself. In the end, she had to concede that there probably was no obvious solution. “I’m sorry,” Rarity offered, but Twilight shook her head. “Don’t be. I don’t even know if there is an answer, or if can be inferred from what I know.” “I see. If I may ask, why did you come to me with this?” “Uhm...” Twilight shrugged. “You’re smart. And it’s pretty common that sometimes you just don’t see things yourself, even if they’re right there.” “Well... I guess I’m not that smart, then, if I didn’t come up with anything new.” “You said a lot of what I came up with.” Twilight frowned, a spark of her horn causing a flat paper to materialize on the table between them. “Anchoring spell,” she explained at the questioning look she received from Rarity. “I learned it a while ago, it lets me enchant objects so I can recall them from anywhere. I do it to keep easy access to important documents. And here...” Her eyes darted across the list. “Yeah, you covered most of this.” “Still, why me? Fluttershy is the one who actually took care of a phoenix, and Pinkie would be my first address to finding things that nopony else is seeing. And what about Spike?” “I already asked Spike.” Twilight drank the rest of her tea, the taste lifting up her mood. “But you have a point. I’ll ask them, too.” Rarity nodded. “And do pressure the princess a bit more. This isn’t the right time to be mysterious, she should just tell you everything she knows.” “...” “What?” Twilight was flabbergasted. “You... you’re questioning the princess’ judgment!” “Oh. I suppose I am, indeed.” “She’s hundreds of years old! Hundreds of years of experience, maybe even longer-” “Well, but so is Luna.” Twilight opened her mouth, but closed it without saying anything. Rarity’s remark had beaten her speechless. “Well,” she said at last, “I guess that’s one thing I hadn’t thought of myself.” “Oh. You’re welcome.” Twilight giggled. “Alright.” She stood up. “I guess I won’t bother you further. Oh and, do you want some of my mysterious super-delicious tea as a reward?” Rarity’s face lit up. “That would be marvelous.” Twilight nodded, and Rarity followed her into the kitchen. “I’ll make sure to save it for special occasions.”
Chapter 9It had seemed like such a good idea. Such a smart thing to do. Such a sensible, safe way to conduct her research. But neither Pinkie nor Fluttershy had been able to help.
Chapter 10Twilight stood still, staring blankly out the window above her desk. It was now eleven days after the start of her project, and their weekly picnic was due tomorrow. It was also the twenty-fourth of May, not that that was particularly important, and her research so far hadn’t been a success. She was about halfway through the books she had wanted to read, and though she was still motivated enough to finish them all, she was not optimistic enough anymore to believe that it would advance her cause in the way she had hoped. Peewee had grown to become a familiar sight, but his presence in her home was less informative than one would think. If she were to consider him an animal, then she’d conclude that he was extraordinarily intelligent. He would leave her in peace when she was busy, and come to her during breaks if he wanted something, usually food. He would communicate his taste by taking or rejecting different dishes she offered, and his tastes even seemed to change based on his mood. He liked to take flights around the library, but rarely ever disappeared out of sight, and he had never made any attempts to leave. He did, however, not appear to understand her, at least not yet. A few times, Twilight had carefully tried to ask him something, and it had not felt like she was talking to an equal, not even provided that equal didn’t understand her language. It had felt like talking to an animal. The most fascinating thing to observe had been what Twilight assumed was his metabolism. Rather than ejecting parts of the food he ate in physical form – like less graceful creatures tended to do – he would hover in the air, and erupt a shower of orange sparks to slowly fall onto the ground. Twilight could only guess that, with time, they would somehow be decomposed into earth or something. It was notable that he always did this outside, at least that was how it had been the two times she had observed. So... it appeared that he somehow had an intuitive grasp on the the pony concept of tidiness (even though what he did hardly even seemed to be unhygienic), but was not intelligent enough to understand what she was trying to say when she had asked him if he wanted to accompany her to their picnic a week ago... or, when she had asked him if he wanted to be brought back to his parents... Other ponies in town had of course noticed his existence, an unavoidable circumstance if his home was a public library, and Twilight was pretty sure, even, that more ponies than usual had come to the library in recent days, probably just to get a glimpse at him. Even in a town that lay next to a forest full of mystical creatures, a phoenix still seemed to be an attraction. Not that Twilight could blame them. If it was her, she was pretty sure she would have visited the library only to... well, no, that wasn’t true, she would never be able to visit a library and only care about something other than the books. But she would probably want to see him. Even now, that he was around all the time, his mere sight had never stopped being special. There was something inimitably pure and beautiful about a phoenix, something that no other creature could really compare with... But that was hardly a scientific fact to write down. She could try to interact with him a bit more... maybe perform some kind of experiment... but she didn’t want to treat him as an object, or even as a pet; she wanted to treat him as a guest. And you didn’t just perform scientific experiments on a guest without his consent. Maybe she should ask? But how would she know if he really agreed? Or maybe she should-
Chapter 11-write all this down. Twilight pulled up an empty sheet and put her quill at the top of the page. Things I can do next: – Ask the princess for more detailed information – Try to get Peewee’s consent for a few experiments. Otherwise, try it until he shows signs of rejection – Ask Spike to tell me exactly what he has seen Peewee do At this point, Twilight had to admit that she was already getting desperate. Asking Spike was unlikely to lead to any new insights; if he had seen something extraordinary, he would have told her. After a while of thinking, Twilight gave a barely audible sigh and added a fourth point. – Set up safety measures, try to poke at his mind That would not be safe, measures or not. But so what? It seemed clear, at this point, that staying safe wasn’t working. It was not working. As much as she wanted it to, it just wasn’t working... Before she could put the connection into conscious thoughts, she wrote down a fifth point. – Try to bring Peewee back to his parents. See if he wants to leave This was not unlikely to kill her experiments, setting her far back. But... It was wrong to keep him around if he didn’t really want to be here... Twilight felt frustration dwelling up inside her. She still believed that he was intelligent enough to make that choice, even though it had not shown. Why did she believe that? Why... With a renewed sense of determination, Twilight made a checkmark beside the first point, then she grabbed another letter.
Chapter 13Dear Twilight, the issue I am facing is complicated, and not easily explained. I assume you believe me to have well-reasoned motives for most of what I do, and that I don’t struggle with decisions such as what I should or should not keep a secret. Such is a fair guess, and true more often than not. But this is different. You know I am neither omnipotent nor infallible. I repeat this now to prepare you for what I have decided to explain. I hope it is not too much of a shock to you regardless. Over the past millennia, Luna and I have tried our best to gradually improve the world that we live in. Life today is better than it was a hundred years ago, if not by much, and life then was better than it was another hundred years prior – if not by much – and so on. The better things become, the more afraid we have been of change, and the more cautious we have been in applying improvements. Phoenixes scare me. My memory is blurry, I do not recall the past as well as you do, but I believe I have always done my best to avoid making them my enemies. If something happened to me, Twilight, so many lives would be affected. I cannot risk it. I cannot risk anything. I keep Philomena by my side, not as a way to keep an eye on her, but to allow her to keep an eye on me. Because if what I believe is true, then the individuality that we have among ponies does not apply in the same way to phoenixes. Information which one has might somehow be available to others. You are asking me to share what I know. I know very little. I only have observations, questions, and uncertainties, and I see very little consistency. Are they intelligent, or are they not? I have seen reality point in both directions. Twilight, Philomena is here, reading the letter, or perhaps reading my mind, or perhaps sitting on my shoulder because it is comfortable. I have shown her everything I have written to you on this subject. I do not believe she wants me to continue. I shall see if she minds me sending this to you. Do what you believe is best. They will not hurt you for trying, not by will. in Love, Princess Celestia
Chapter 14Twilight felt a lump in her throat as the trotted further away from Ponyville, the town now at the edge of her vision whenever she turned her head to look. Yesterday, Peewee had come with her to the picnic, and now, he had had come with her again, possibly for the last time. A little voice in her head told her that she was unlikely to find his parents. A little voice in her head told her that, if she tried but failed, she might just have to bring him back home. A little voice in her head was silenced and ignored. If she didn’t find his parents today, then she’d try again another time. Twilight was unsure if she did this because she wanted to do what was best for him, or because she was afraid of what she would try if he stayed with her. Somehow, this had become the compromise, her way to ask for consent. She would offer him to return, and only proceed if he chose to stay. She turned her head around again, and could not see Ponyville anymore. The road to the Badlands was long, around the entirety of the Everfree forest and further, but time was not an issue. Plus, if Peewee was going to leave, then the way home would be a lot easier... But then, the weight on her back disappeared. Twilight turned around to see Peewee flapping his wings, staring into the direction from which they had come. Seconds passed, during which Twilight was at a loss for things to do. A shiver ran down her spine as the phoenix turned around, watching her with an untypical expression. It was almost as if he was tilting his head... Are they intelligent, or are they not? I have seen reality point into both directions. Did he know? Die he understand where she was trying to lead him, even so early on? “Do you want to go home?” No reaction. “I can bring you back to your parents.” The phoenix blinked. “I...” The words got stuck in her throat as he flew towards her, landing on top of her shoulder, and leaning his head against hers. His touch was hot, almost painfully so, and more so than usually. Was he saying goodbye? Would he not need her to come with him? Was this the last time that she- But he was not. He flew back upwards, fixating his gaze onto where Ponyville had been. She could not see it anymore, but maybe he could? Then, he made an unmistakable gesture with his head. “You want to stay?” As an answer, the phoenix flapped his wings, slowly flying the way back. A sense of euphoria took over Twilight as she followed, quickly being forced into a canter as he accelerated his flight. “Hey. Hey!” Peewee turned his head mid flight, letting out a strange cry, only to go even faster. A smile spread across Twilight’s face as she galloped after him, soon evolving into a laugh as they raced each other... heading back home. Author's Note Future Chapters are going to be longer – still not long, but more like normal length than what’s been presented so far. The first fourteen chapters are sort of an extended prologue, in my mind, that happened to fit naturally into tiny chunks, but now as things will begin to get real, that will change. This is as far as the story has/had been published by the point of submission.
Chapter 15Generally, Twilight liked to keep promises she made, including those made to herself. And while the decision at hoof hadn’t technically been one, she nonetheless felt a similar amount of devotion to her choice, probably due to her having used the phoenix’ potential departure as a chance to avoid taking action. Well, that chance had not come to be, so action would be taken. She had contacted Rarity, and had asked her to bring a friend capable to provide what she needed. Twilight did her best to calm her nerves as she pulled open the door to greet her visitors, one of whom being Rarity, the other a pink unicorn mare with a purple and lavender mane, a mare whom she recognized after a second’s thought. “Amethyst Star.” “Hey, you remember me.” “Yeah. You’re head of the Animal Department.” The recipient shook her head. “That’s gone to Fluttershy now. Makes lots more sense that way.” Twilight nodded, stepping aside to let both of them in. “From what I’ve heard, you’re the only pony Rarity could think of that knows how to cast a type B shield.” “Well,” said Rarity, “most of my acquaintances aren’t magicians.” Twilight nodded again. “How did you learn it?” “Studied it myself. Thought it’d be useful. Ponyville’s been pretty dangerous lately.” “That’s great.” Self-study generally indicated a higher degree of understanding, and, consequently, of skill. “I’ll need you to use it on me – just the normal version – for at most a minute. Uhm.” She gave herself a push, deciding to get the uncomfortable out of the way as quickly as possible. “Do you want to get paid for this?” “I’m good. Thanks, though.” “Alright.” Not a complicated mare, it seemed. “Okay. Do you know about the phoenix?” The pink mare bowed her head. “Great. I’m running an experiment where I’ll try to get a peek at his thoughts. I probably won’t need any protection, but I’m not... sure, and a bit of extra security can’t hurt. Should we get right to it?” Both of them voiced their agreement, and Twilight led the way upstairs. “This... isn’t really a secret,” she said carefully, “but I’d still prefer it if you didn’t go around telling everypony. Alright.” She approached the small, wooden table in the center of the room, the same table that usually stood in the entrance hall. On top of it rested the phoenix, sitting still, almost attentively. “So, I will stand right... here, and you can choose whichever position you like best, just make sure you have good aim. And Rarity, could you stand beside me?” “As you wish.” Rarity stepped next to her. “Twilight, this is not going to be dangerous, is it?” “It is a bit dangerous,” Twilight responded truthfully, “otherwise I wouldn’t have asked you two. But only for me.” “Only for you?” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “You will forgive me if I don’t find that reassuring.” “I... well, there are some risks, but I...” She didn’t look the fashionista in the eyes as she said this, and a part of her felt doubts dwelling up, but they were only more, more of the same. She had already put them behind her. “I thought about this for a long time, and I decided that I want to try.” A pause. “Okay?” “Well...” Rarity shrugged. “It is your call, I suppose, if you...” A frown crossed her face. “Hold on...” She shook her head. “No, what am I saying. This is not right.” And before she could see it coming, Rarity had extended a hoof to her chin, raising her head so that Twilight could no longer avoid her gaze. “Twilight. This is really dangerous, isn’t it? Not as in, somepony might get hurt, but worse. Tell me the truth.” Twilight’s first reaction was frustration. She had intended to skip all this. To simply do the experiment, proof that it was safe, and then talk about it, at which point no-one would be that upset anymore. How had Rarity found out? What had given her away? Why... But once she realized what she was thinking, she felt regret dwelling up inside her, and even a bit of shame. This was not like her. Hiding information from her friends to prevent them from questioning her decisions, that was not what she was about. Stifling a sigh, she forced herself to give the honest answer. “Okay, yes. Theoretically, there is a chance that it could kill me.” “Then why,” said Rarity in a slow tone, “do you want to do it?” “Because lots of things can theoretically kill us, Rarity, and we do them anyway, like me visiting Zecora, or like AJ doing deliveries halfway across Equestria, or Fluttershy taking care of frogs in Froggy Bottom Bog. And this is important, and the risk is really small.” “How small?” “I don’t know. One percent? Probably less-” “Darling. Darling. Darling!” Rarity seemed genuinely upset. “One percent is not a tiny number when it comes to your survival! I have no doubts that you are better at math than I am, but if you risked a one percent chance of death once a week when visiting Zecora, you would last, what, two years? This is your life, Twilight! I would not take that chance even if made me a star in Canterlot this very instant!” “If families take their kids to the mountains on vacation,” Twilight held against her, “then there’s statistically also a one percent chance that somepony dies over the course of a decade. They might not think about it like I am, but they still are making that judgment, by deciding that the fun they have is worth the risk. Well, I’m doing the same. Consider it a compensation for the last ten summer vacations I skipped.” For a few moments, Rarity watched her as if she had lost her mind, and Twilight began to wonder if she was about to declare her crazy, but then- “You are not wrong, I suppose. But... well, for one, is that a real number?” Twilight nodded. “One percent over ten vacations of one family?” Twilight nodded. “A family would have more than one member.” “Oh.” Twilight bit her lip at the realization of having missed the obvious, swallowing. It was true, and somehow, it mattered to her. She had not thought it through before, a fact that she now felt ashamed of, and her own argument had sounded convincing to her. Not that it made any real difference, of course; how it compared to other risks didn’t actually matter for her situation, but... “Uhm. Thirty vacations?” “And is this really worth that risk?” Twilight lowered her gaze at that. Licking her lips, she did her best to genuinely reconsider. She didn’t have to do this. She really didn’t. She could just give up and- ... no! No, no, no, and no! This was too important to her, and it would haunt her for too long if she just abandoned it. She nodded, whereupon Rarity scoffed in frustration, clearly not having received the answer she had hoped for. “Fine. I will not question your judgment, but Twilight, if you’re doing this, you owe it to everyone to set up a proper last will first.” That hit her like a strike in the face. “Excuse me?” “Yes? I am not trying to complicate this for you, but if you are risking your life, then-” “I am not going to die, Rarity, it is a tiny chance!” “Make a shortened version, then. At least provide some instructions for all the questions which will come up in case of the worst outcome.” Her voice was calm, and Twilight couldn’t sense any trace of sarcasm or dishonesty. “You are a utilitarian, aren’t you? Ignoring the danger can hardly be the right course. Ah, and tell the other girls before you go through with this.” Twilight’s blood was boiling. There was something incredibly humiliating about being told to compose a last will, if it was almost certainly not going to be your last will, and the fact that Rarity seemed to be genuine about it, not just trying to make her reconsider, only made it worse. Nonetheless... to put it in the fashionista’s words... she was not wrong... and Twilight had already made enough mistakes for one day to insist on her position, so... “Fine.” Rarity nodded. “We shall come back at another date.” At the word ‘we’, Twilight turned towards the pink pony with a wince, whose presence she had forgotten about entirely throughout the debate. “Listen, I’m-” “No need to apologize. What you discussed sounded important enough.” Twilight nodded numbly. “Alright.” Amethyst’s eyes hung on Peewee for a moment, who didn’t show any signs of having understood the conversation, then she turned away with a shrug. “See you then.” “Yeah... bye.” Twilight sighed, too frustrated to even escort her guests back to the door as they headed downstairs. Ugh.
Chapter 16Twilight didn’t know if Rarity had expected her to change her mind over the course of the week, but if she had, then such had not come to be. Twilight had reconsidered, she truly had, but she had arrived at the same conclusion, be it for different reasons. If phoenixes really were intelligent, and if nopony had studied them before – and everything she had learned so far seemed to point in that direction – then, then she was about to dive into a whole new realm of unexplored potential, potential that went beyond just scientific discoveries. It was worth the risk. And yet, sometimes, Twilight still found herself struck by a sudden rush of fear, and she imagined what would happen if she was wrong, if she really... this was probably the true reason why she had wanted to act so hastily, to avoid this fear... once, she had broken into sweat at the thought, and almost given into panic. Within those moments, she had expected herself to change her mind once it was over, but she had not. One percent, so she had told herself, that was almost as unlikely as a die rolling six and six again and then five or six. Somehow, thinking of it like that had make her feel a tiny bit better. The other four had all offered to be there when she tried, but Twilight had declined. Having other magical creatures present not only wouldn’t be helpful; it could actually be dangerous. Unforeseen magic bursts could trigger avalanche effects, which was why she hadn’t even bothered asking the princess for help. Pinkie Pie in particular was a wildcard, and although one of the others would be unlikely to make the difference – why take the risk? Amethyst was there for the shield, and Rarity was there to provide moral support if, somehow, she was being attacked psychologically. Including anyone else would not be smart. And so, nine days after her first attempt, the three of them stood at almost identical positions on the library floor, and Twilight still felt afraid. Rarity who, at their latest meeting, had pulled her aside to put her conviction on trial one more time, was now standing beside her, their gazes locked. Twilight could see no chagrin in her gaze, only open worry, and perhaps a reflection of her own fear. “Don’t die.” Twilight nodded. “I won’t.” Rarity drew her into a hug. She gave her a squeeze before she let go, taking a step away, but leaving a hoof resting on her shoulder. “You’re ready?” she heard Amethyst say. She nodded, and moments later she could feel the signs of a spell on the magical plane, seconds before its effects became visible. The shield was purple, a lighter version of her own. Her heart pounded as she finally did it, hesitating no longer so as not to risk the shield decreasing in power. Her senses exited her mind, reaching out for the phoenix who was once more sitting still, almost as if he understood that something was happening. Gradually, Twilight made herself familiar with the texture of his being, holding her breath for just another moment as she crossed the line into the realms of his mind. Without warning, without reason, a crushing wave of pain assaulted her, sending her screaming out in shock and panic. She retreated her senses as fast as she could, taking a few moments to realize that Rarity was holding her head between her hooves, shouting her name. “Twilight! Twilight!” “I’m okay.” Breathlessly, Twilight threw a confused look around, realizing that she had collapsed. She stood back up. The pain had vanished the same moment her tie to the phoenix’ mind had snapped. Moreover, it had left no trace; not in her body, nor in her mind. It was only the shock that had made her fall, and the panic in that one moment when she had thought it all a horrible mistake. But it was fine. She was fine. Well, at least she was still alive, and that was good news. Her fear had been injury, potentially fatal injury, and while the result certainly hadn’t been what she had hoped for, it also hadn’t been what she had feared. She told Amethyst to put out her shield, then explained what had happened as well as she could. Rarity looked relieved, and Twilight actually felt flattered by the amount of empathy she showed. “At least you are not, ah, injured. I suppose you did get hurt.” Rarity shook her head. “Please tell me you aren’t going to try again.” “I can’t.” Rarity gave a sad sigh. “It’s less dangerous than it was on our first try. I did it, and whatever has caused the pain hasn’t injured me. It makes no sense to stop now.” The fashionista said nothing at that. “You need the shield again?” Amethyst asked. “Good heavens!” Rarity’s head spun around, giving both other unicorns a stern glare. “We aren’t going to try right now. Take a break, Twilight. You can give it another shot once we have all calmed down.” Her gaze drilled into hers, and Twilight nodded hastily. There was no reason to rush things. What followed were twenty minutes of time spent downstairs. Twilight made tea for them all (a more commonly used mixture of Matcha and ginger), and Rarity did a serviceable job of introducing conversation. But even though there was no tension between them, and even though Amethyst turned out to be quite an affable mare, Twilight’s heart was simply not in it. Her thoughts only revolved around one thing, and soon they found themselves in front of the table once more, about to run the experiment a second time. The shield was up, even though Twilight began to suspect that it would be of little use, and Rarity stood beside her. When she dove into the phoenix’ mind, the result was the same as on the previous try. It hurt. It hurt a lot. But it wasn’t injuring her. Twilight took the pain in, observing the situation apprehensively, and with surprising calm. The pain was not in her head, nor in her horn. Instead, it seemed to be close to her breast, somewhere... and it was neither a stitching nor a squeezing kind of feeling, nor did it burn or, really, feel like anything she had experienced before. It was just pain, pain with no apparent cause or reason. Twilight could feel no magic coming from the phoenix, no traces of a spell that was causing this. Was she just imagining it? But... She squeezed her eyes, groaning quietly, and then did the only sensible thing in pulling back. Once again, the pain evaporated into nothingness the moment that she lost touch with the phoenix’ mind, and Twilight took a few seconds to relish in its absence. As soon as the pleasant feeling of not being tormented by an invisible force seized to console her, however, she felt a quickly growing sense of frustration. What. This didn’t make sense. At all. It made no sense. None. She would be forced to repeat the process. There was no way she could back down now that she had all the more reason to assume that it wasn’t really dangerous. But what kind of research would this be, that made her suffer so much? And what would happen if she wasn’t going to find out more? That would be the most disappointing project she had ever undertaken, and the the most unpleasant one to boot. “And...?” Twilight shook her head. “Same result,” she said, realizing the harshness in her voice only after the words were spoken. “I’m sorry,” she added in a friendlier tone, “I mean, I got the result again. It hurt a lot, somewhere in my breast, but I don’t even know why, and as soon as I pulled back, it stopped. I mean, you’d think there’d be some kind of aftermath, but it’s just gone.” “Sorry about that. I didn’t feel anything, so I assume my shield was pretty useless?” Twilight nodded. “I didn’t even sense any magic. Whatever is doing this, it doesn’t seem to care at all about spells. I’m sorry.” Amethyst Star shrugged, seemingly unbothered. “No worries. You said from the beginning that it probably wouldn’t make a difference. Wouldn’t be science if we already knew it worked.” “No...” Twilight agreed with a sad sigh. “It wouldn’t.” Later that evening, Twilight tried for a third time. Since the only tradeoff was her enduring temporary pain, so she had rationalized, it was smarter to act now, while she was filled with a strange sense of determinism fueled by her frustration, than to think more about it, try to decide whether it was worth it, conclude that it was, and do it later. As soon as she touched his mind, pain ignited inside her breast. This time, Twilight could locate it easily. It was contained, it was predictable, and it hurt like fire. And she had understood something else, too. The reason why she was able to endure this, even willingly, was the particular nature of the pain. If you hit your head, broke your leg, or had caries, then it wasn’t just the pain which was unpleasant, it was the feeling of that particular part of your body being injured. Pain was inherently tied to injury, it was why it existed in the first place, as a way for your body to send warning signals. But now, as Twilight continued trying to understand the pulsating source inside her breast, that was not so. There was no part of her body that felt injured, no feeling signaling that the pain was bad for her, no negative feedback save for the pain itself. And this must have been, must have been the reason why she had been able to endure this for as long as she had already, because, because if she had been asked, after the first time, then there was no way she would, would ever have guessed a time of, of, how long had it been already, two minutes? Two minutes of a pain this strong? It was not enough to stop, stop it from being bad, from being negative. But it was, was a large, was a large difference. And maybe, just maybe, maybe it would, would be possible, possible for her to stop sensing, to stop sensing it as negative; maybe... Twilight realized that her thoughts were getting slower. Considering the pain as merely an occurrence and not as horrible was slowly seizing to work. It was overwhelming her, just as it had last time, only this time it had taken it longer. With a sigh, Twilight pulled back. Once more, the pain vanished immediately, leaving nothing behind, just like the last two times... and the time before that, where she had been so thoughtless, and had needed Rarity to nudge her into the right direction, when she had made a mistake, acted irresponsibly... Err, what? What had been then? She had lost her train of thought. Well, it was obvious that she was in an exhausted mental condition. Managing a smile, she felt for a box of nuts, putting a few on the table in front of Peewee, whose position on the table had remained unchanged. It was important to signal to him that she wasn’t blaming him for anything, because if there was one thing she was sure of, it was that this was not his doing, least not voluntarily. It had been her decision to force this clash of natures, and the results were her burden to bear. Peewee gave an eager flap of his wings at the sight of the four cobs Twilight had produced, so she cracked them open with her telekinesis, one at a time, offering him their tasty interiors. She watched him eat, feeling her tiredness increasing as she did so, even though it was still had to be at least four hours ‘till midnight... Amethyst Star had been nice, and looking back on it, she found herself glad that she wasn’t holding any grudge against her. Not that she had actually done something wrong... getting a pony to do the shield had surely been the smart thing to do, there was no doubt. It was when she had wanted to do it the first time that she hadn’t been smart; rather ruthless, really, irresponsible towards the other girls, and everypony else she knew, for that matter... “You want some more?” Peewee was finished with the four nuts she had provided, each one swallowed in a single bite. As expected, he showed no reaction to her question, so she just produced another four. “You’ll have to answer for all this,” she muttered absently while cracking them, “if I end up finding out that you’re actually intelligent and understand every word I’m saying.” It took only two seconds after her glow had faded around the final nut that his spout came shooting down, picking up the first. “But I suppose you there’s no chance you really do, is there? Why should you? Even if you are smarter than us, there’s still no way that you would understand my language. Which makes it so strange that Celestia thought Philomena might have been reading her letter...” Her voice trailed off. “Maybe you don’t understand what I’m saying, but you infer everything by reading my thoughts? Is that how it works? Can you interpret them, but only as long as I don’t think in words? Is that why you didn’t fly around while I was experimenting? Or why you came back home with me? Or why you go out when you...” She frowned. “I don’t know if I ever actually wanted for you to go out for that, though. Or did I?” She wasn’t sure. She didn’t remember. As she thought back on it, she noticed that her thoughts kept drifting away, thinking about bigger things... how she should be glad that she was still alive. Maybe she should stop Pinkie before she threw a Twilight-is-not-dead-party, because, surely, that would be a terrible idea, she had no intention of others knowing about this, ponies had a tendency to be irrational when it came to touchy subjects... she herself was not excluded from that, just affected a bit less strongly... And she thought again about how she had been so ruthless, been so stupid. It was not good to be stupid. That was sort of the number one rule as a magician: don’t do anything stupid, it might get you killed. It only applied for those who were powerful enough to seriously harm themselves, which weren’t many, but she was among them. If she wasn’t careful, then there were no limits to the harm a failed spell could do to her... and to others. She didn’t even need a phoenix for that. But there was a simple rule to eliminate such risk, which was that, if you weren’t sure whether something was the right course, you simply delayed it until you were. Which was something she should know better than breaking, but which she had broken nine days ago... Her eyes flickered onto the table. Seven of the eight nuts were gone, but the final one still lay inside its broken shell. With a frown, Twilight lifted it up at eye’s height, wondering if there was something wrong with it, but she failed see what it would be. “Not hungry anymore?” With a shrug, she ate it herself. “Passing up just one nut? That’s a strange behavior for an animal.” Peewee gave a quiet chirp at that, as if laughing at a joke she had made.
Chapter 17Twilight had vivid dreams that night. Their remains trickled out of her memory like water into the earth when she woke up, too elusive for her to hold them back. Soon all that remained were fractions, leaving her vaguely disappointed and with a feeling as if she had just lost something. Applejack had appeared in them, or in one, and a large building, somewhere, and they had meant to escape, but so many other things had been there, too, and she was unlikely to ever find out what those had been; they would gradually slide into oblivion, just like so many memories before. With a sigh, she groggily slid out of bed, teetering towards the stairs, rubbing her eyes as she did so. What she now needed was tea... preferably black... and then... The sinking feeling lessened, and a sense of excitement rose up in her as she remembered the hypothesis she had come up with on the day before. What if... Peewee did not understand her on an intellectual level, but was able to read her emotions intuitively? That warranted a test, right after breakfast. I’d like you to fly to me, and sit on my shoulder. Twilight watched Peewee finishing his hay fries with a frown. It was an unintuitive sight for a phoenix to be eating fries, however, he really seemed to like it. She had offered him an apple before (directly from Applejack’s farm, and cut into small, edible pieces), which he had rejected, even though he had eaten one just a few days ago. Right now, though, his diet was secondary. What mattered was whether her thesis was correct, and as of now... I want you to come here, and sit on my shoulder. She should probably have a consistent wording. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. The last stem disappeared in his spout, and Peewee gave what Twilight assumed to be a satisfied cry. He pivoted his head around, as if deciding what he wanted to do next. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. I want you to come and sit on my shoulder. Peewee flapped his wings... Yes! I want you to come and sit on my- ... and flew outside the window. Tartarus. Well. It was too early to discard her hypothesis just yet, but it really had not seemed as if he had even registered that she was trying to communicate with him. It did not look good. Absently, Twilight floated the bowl with the blended apple towards her, chewing on the pieces one at a time. They were no less delicious than normally. Twilight had tried to put her mind into other things for the time being, at least until Peewee was tired of flying around and returned to the library. Sadly, even though all she had wanted to do was to slide into her usual routine, it had somehow been more difficult than normal, just because she had a more important goal on her mind. Silly, given that said goal had no good reason to interfere now, but not an uncommon occurrence. Actually, there was probably a name for that phenomenon. She should look into that some time. Now, however, she was stalling. Peewee had returned, about a minute ago, and Twilight had planned to endure another round of pain, for science, once he did so. Of course, she had not promised this, so she was free to change her mind if she wanted... Ah, cowardice. Such a lovely generator for silly thoughts. In a desperate attempt to put herself and the surrounding situation into a humorous light that would hopefully make it easier to muster up the courage she needed, Twilight stepped forward, licking her lips as she slowly, very slowly, began to channel magic through her horn. Leave her own mind... find his... Alright. Now was the time. She touched his mind, not even wincing as the pain returned, assaulting her breast. Perhaps, it was only possible now? To communicate with him, that was. Not that it made a lot of sense, but why not try... Come close... no. I want you to come here and sit on my shoulder. I want you to... come here and sit on my shoulder. Apparently not. Twilight took somewhat of a gaping breath as her perception shifted a bit, and somehow the pain became more real than it had been a moment ago, or perhaps less real. She closed her eyes, trying to release all tension from her body, relax all muscles, and simply observe... the pain... most akin to how some unguents made a wound burn, at first. It would be so much easier if she actually knew that something would come off it. She still understood so little, and all she was really doing was to trigger the process, and hope for new revelations, but could it just as well end up being for naught... just like her previous- ... !!! She was such an idiot. Of course it hadn’t worked. The point would not be for him to read her thoughts, it would be for him to read her feelings, so she had to want him to come and sit on her shoulder, not put that wish into words and then think those words, that was missing the whole point! How had she been... Uh... Excitement was a suitable cure for morning tiredness, so she had found, but not for this kind of pain. She had done better just staying calm. Ah, and she didn’t want to interrupt her session now. She could test that hypothesis later. She was already too far in, and though she didn’t know if time mattered, it was still a distinct possibility. Alas... Stay calm... Stay relaxed... Stay... It hurt... Twilight bit on her lip, perhaps trying to create a lesser source of pain to block out the first. Which was... was of course... nonsense, you didn’t fight fire with fire, that didn’t work. Ah... just two minutes more. Twilight retracted, or so it felt like, back into her shell. Not trying to accept the pain anymore so much as trying to hide from it. It really was, really was not that bad. It really was not. Twilight could remember rare occasions, two to be specific, were she had, had been injured quite badly, and though none of them had hurt as much, as much as now, she would much rather endure this than those injuries. This, this was a bit like jumping into cold water, because, because it took courage to do it, but once you were in, once you were in, at first, it wasn’t even that unpleasant, only if you stayed in too long, like, like now, then it became too cold, and then, then it was, was a bit much. Maybe, maybe she should only take shorter... shorter sessions... because that... but... but then this... this was already her longest session to date, so if she didn’t try to, try to break that in the future, then better make this worthwhile. But... uh... this really was enough. Before she... okay, break it. Twilight retreated, realizing that she had lost her stance, having sort of sunk into a crawling form on the floor. Again, no aftermath. Plus, the absence of pain was quite a wonderful feeling. Twilight shakily took the steps towards her cot. In a way, since she had been so reckless on her first try, it was probably somewhat warranted for her to suffer a bit here... She lay down, not being tired enough to fall asleep, but exhausted enough to fade in and out of consciousness for a bit... strange, unconnected, and incoherent thoughts popped into her mind at random... A bit in, Twilight found herself conscious again, thinking about the time Rarity had- Hold on. This was already the second time she had thought back to that day. And yesterday... yeah, she could remember it vaguely, she had also thought back to that... even... hadn’t it even been twice? Could that really be a coincidence? Or, more relevantly, could it be something else? Quickly, realizing that time might suddenly be a factor, her mind formed another hypothesis. As soon as it was done, she emptied her head, observing her thoughts... Well, that was the blue rabbit, it did not work like that. She couldn’t just not think... not that that was impossible, but it was quite hard, and she had never learned it. If a novice like her tried, then that inevitably resulted in thinking about the fact that she was trying not to think, and then some. Which was annoying, really, because how would she confirm her hypothesis if she was thinking all the time, it had triggered more whenever she had lost track of her own thoughts... Well then... what had happened these days... AJ’s farm had been doing better, though her Grandma had health issues. And she, ah, Pinkie Pie had... there was... the door in Canterlot’s sleeping quarters... really irresponsible acting on her part- Her mind immediately snapped out of it with a surge of excitement as she realized that it had happened again. So the intrusion into the phoenix’ mind redirected her thoughts. Now that was a discovery. And the target was always the day that Rarity and Amethyst Star had come to her, and she had wanted to do the experiment, but Rarity had made her reconsider, and do some preparations first. Why that? Because it was where she had almost entered the phoenix’ mind? No, that seemed far fetched. And it was never the experiment that drew her thoughts, it was the irresponsibility on her part, the... Ah, so that was it? Because she had made a mistake? Did it direct to mistakes? Sure enough, yes, as she thought on it now, she noticed that the thought seemed to be... highlighted, so to speak. Yes, it clearly was a noticeable difference, she was driven to think about it. That was nice, because it meant that she didn’t have to lose consciousness in order to verify her theory. Okay, and what about the mistake she had just made? Conducting the experiment in such a dumb way? ... No, there was nothing. It felt normal. Perhaps, it was not about it being a mistake, perhaps it was about it being irresponsible, or rude, or... When had she done something rude the last time? Frantically, she scoured through the past weeks. Usually, Twilight really tried not to be rude, but surely there were some instances where she had fallen short of that goal; it didn’t take much to be at least a little bit rude, on accident or just due to not thinking enough. Maybe something concerning Pinkie Pie, who was the most sensitive... what about... about... uh... yes, the time that she, no, the time that Pinkie had shown her the dolls she had made of some of her friends, and Twilight had been a bit creeped out and not given a very kind response- Yes! Yes. It was there. It radiated. Not as much, but it did. Quickly, she thought back to the Rarity thing. Ah, there it was, so much stronger. It even seemed to have gained in intensity since her departure, not lost. So that was it. The phoenix’ pain brought into memory all the times when she had hurt other ponies. The only question which remained was... why? Twilight stood up, beginning to pace around the room. If something inflicted pain for-, and called attention to the times where she had hurt other ponies, then there seemed to be two obvious angles for that. One, it was some kind of purification or moral judgment. Two, it was malicious. Everything in her was prone to believe that phoenixes were, for the lack of a better world, good. But what evidence did she really have for that? Peewee had not done anything for her, really, and whenever she tried to approach him, she was rewarded with pain... albeit, a very pure form of pain, that was easier to endure and left no injuries. And... She should test her other hypothesis. That might help. Come to me, Twilight thought, approaching the phoenix, and then she repeated it without words, only wishing, wishing for him to come close. Because if he did, then how could he be evil, if he reacted to her wishes, he could not be, he must be good. Peewee turned his head in her direction, blinking. A new sense of hope washed over her, and she tried to pour it into the wish, to make herself care as much as possible... And then the phoenix flapped his wings and came to her, sitting down on her shoulder. At this moment, Twilight almost cried. “So you are good.” She smiled, knowing that it was true, only true. Peewee let out a chill-inducing cry, and something hot stroke over her mane from behind. He must have extended a wing, but she didn’t turn her head to look, standing still, only feeling his warmth. This, of course, explained a lot. The reason why he had stood still every time Twilight had tried to approach him was that she had wanted him to, and Rarity and Amethyst probably had, too. The reason why he was considerate to her without understanding what she was doing was because he instinctively tried not to hurt her... well, he wouldn’t hurt her by interrupting her studies, but it would still be distracting, irritating for a moment, affecting her in a negative way, even if it was slight. It seemed to fit, as nothing he had ever done had been inconvenient to her, it had all been considerate... and kind. And, was the reason why a connection between them caused pain on her part that she wasn’t as good, not as pure as him? Surely, it was not intended. That would run contrary to everything she had just found out. No, it must be a natural reaction. And Twilight suddenly had an epiphany. She’d have to think about her guilt while being connected to the phoenix, and then... then something would happen... she just knew it... it just seemed right... it would... it would purge it, maybe? But if so, would it eventually be done with it? Them? Her thoughts? Her guilt? And if that was the case, then would it only be temporary, or would she someday be done with all of it? And if that was the case, then what would be next? If she was given absolution, so to speak? What then? She had no idea.
Chapter 18While her initial revelation hadn’t come without its eventual share of doubts, they had been all but wiped out no more than five seconds into her next session. She had directed her thoughts onto the incident, and the result had been immediate. The pain, finally having found its target, had ignited her memories, and it had burnt her guilt, putting her through an experience unlike anything she’d felt before. It had been in equal parts horrible and exhilarating, as the pain had still hurt her, but the sensation of diminishing guilt had been one of the most addictive things she had ever felt. Afterwards, she had still been able to recognize her flaws, but she had not felt them anymore; the memory was unstrained, pure; the guilt was gone. Even so, she had broken the connection early, valuing patience over curiosity. The smart thing, she had reasoned, was to to study the effects more thoroughly before proceeding. Since her research still seemed far from its conclusion, she had neglected to tell the princesses about her discoveries. She had, however, told the other girls, and their reaction had not been what she had expected. Rarity had asked if it was possible to establish a connection for other ponies. Twilight had truthfully responded that, yes, that would be possible (and fairly easy, too). Rarity had then asked if she might try it. Twilight had reminded her of the pain that came with it, and had noted that she’d expected them to be more shocked, and certainly less intrigued. Rarity had remarked that she thought to understand why Twilight was doing it, and that losing her guilt, as Twilight had put it, was something she really, really wanted to experience herself, even if it came with certain drawbacks. Twilight had mulled her words over, proceeding to ask the other four if they also felt that way. Applejack had said that, no, the whole thing sounded insane, and why would anypony even consider harming herself voluntarily. Pinkie Pie, oddly enough, had said that she needed to give more thought to the issue. Fluttershy had said, in a somewhat intimidated murmur, that she didn’t think she’d want to go far, but that she still wanted to, um, try. Rainbow Dash had seemed to be fighting with herself, but had eventually declined. Twilight had remarked that it was still potentially dangerous (albeit far beyond the one percent figure), since she had only tested it on herself, and that they would have to be doing it based on their own risk. All three had voiced their understanding and their agreement. Finally, Pinkie had announced that she’d now thought about it enough, and also wanted to try. “If you don’t remember the last time you hurt somepony, try to search for it. It will point you into the right direction. But if it hurts too much, just tell me to get you out. I think it takes a while to get used to. The first time I tried, that... didn’t turn out so well.” Twilight threw a look at Rarity, who gave a confirming nod. “But it was mostly shock, was it not?” “Right.” Twilight’s gaze was fixated at Pinkie, who notably wasn’t bouncing, perhaps implying that she understood the seriousness of the issue. “But if you think it’s injuring you,” Twilight continued, “then please, tell me. Because that really shouldn’t happen. Or, if anything doesn’t fit with what I told you, say something. It might still behave differently for other ponies, and if it does, we should really be careful.” Fluttershy seemed to be shivering a bit, but she didn’t say anything. “I think you should confirm again that you really want to do this. I know that you said yes, but... just... look what you feel right now. If you find yourself wishing that you hadn’t signed up, then just don’t do it. It won’t make you a coward. Remember that even Rainbow Dash wasn’t brave enough.” It was a speech Twilight had prepared beforehoof, and which she felt obligated to give. Too often, ponies did stupid things because of social awkwardness. But none of them took the way out. “I really want to try,” Fluttershy murmured, and the other two nodded. “Well, alright then. Follow me.” She led them upstairs, spotting Peewee at a free spot on her desk. She had tried to tell him to stay inside before, and maybe it had worked. “I always have him sit on the table when I do this. Do you guys remember what I told you about how I can ask him to do things?” Affirmative murmurs from all three. “Well, I’ve been meaning to find out if others can do it, too. I think they can, but I haven’t had a chance to try it just yet. So... Fluttershy, why don’t you give it a shot?” “M-me?” The yellow pegasus seemed to shrink a bit as all heads turned towards her, but after a moment she nodded, stepping forward. “So, uhm, I just... wish for him to... sit on the table?” Twilight nodded. “A... alright.” She took a few steps to the left, positioning herself so that both the phoenix and its desired target fell into her vision. Twilight involuntarily held her breath as she stopped, but only a moment later, Peewee flapped his wings, flying towards the table. That had been quick. Quicker than any time she had done it herself, even. “Wooo!” Pinkie Pie cheered, giggled, and bounced over to the blushing pegasus, drawing her into a hug. “Way to go, Fluttershy!” “Um... t-thanks.” “Well done indeed. That was a pretty unambiguous result.” Twilight happily made an imaginary checkmark onto an imaginary list before moving forward. “Alright. I think we’re ready... who wants to go first?” Silence. “Well, somepony has to.” “I...” “Uhm...” “...” “Err... alright. Well...” Twilight furrowed her brow, thinking. When she couldn’t come up with anything smart to solve the problem, she shrugged. “I guess we randomize?” The others voiced hesitant agreement, so Twilight lit her horn, scourging through various shelves until she produced a single die. “Alright, so Fluttershy’s one and two, Pinkie Pie-” “I’m three and six!” “... Pinkie Pie’s three and six, and Rarity’s four and five. Everypony agree?” Another round of agreement followed, and Twilight tossed the die onto the floor. It rolled farther than she had meant for it, and so everypony, including her, rushed over to see which number had come out on top. “Three!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, right before Twilight could. Then, “That’s me! I won! Or... lost... heheheee...” She visibly gulped, and Twilight even saw a drop of sweat on her forehead. “Ehhehhh... well... alrighties!” She shuffled forward, stepping in front of the table. “Uhm. Uhm. Um. I guess I’m ready? Ohh, uhm, how long does it take? Your connection thing? Do I have to do something?” “If nothing goes wrong, just a few seconds,” Twilight responded, “and – no.” Awaiting another nod from the pink pony, Twilight took the familiar path outside her mind, reaching toward the phoenix. Instead of entering his mind, she did an advanced but safe and light-on-energy spell, that would allow her to drag the connection away as a link; then she pulled it towards her friend. “Alright,” she said, her own heartbeat accelerating. “I’m ready, but you can still say no if you change your mind at the last second.” She waited for a few moments, but Pinkie said nothing, only biting her lip. “Okay then. Three... two... one...” And she connected the link to Pinkie’s mind. Almost immediately, Pinkie let out a strange sound, something like a gasp, but it seemed to resemble surprise, not pain. Then she began to giggle, and didn’t seem to stop. Twilight’s eyebrows inevitably shot upwards as she watched, wondering if it was just a way to- But before she could finish her thought, the giggle morphed into a laugh, and then Pinkie winced hard, plummeting downwards until caught by a white cloud. “Hahahahaaaa... stop that! It... it tickles!” Pinkie gasped again, this time sounding like a frantic gasp for air in between her laughter. “Hehehe... stop it! Stop it!” Twilight broke the connection, ending Pinkie’s laughter at once, but leaving her gasping for breath. What. The. a ??? “Puuhhhhhhh...” Pinkie Pie shook her head, as if shaking off a bad dream. “Nice save, Rarity!” “Er...” Twilight still felt utterly confused. “... yeah. Good... reaction.” “Um, Twilight?” Fluttershy spoke up. “That was, uhm. Not supposed to happen, was it?” “No.” Twilight shook her head. “No.” “Uhm. Why do you think-” “I have no clue.” “Just Pinkie Pie?” Rarity offered. “Or because she’s an earth pony?” Fluttershy suggested. “Hehehee... well, none of you are, so if you try too, then we’ll know!” “Would you say that it is still safe?” “Uhm...” Twilight rubbed her brow as she turned towards Rarity, feeling as if there was a knot in her thoughts. “Well...” Okay. Back on track. “Not... as safe,” she said after a moment of thought. “Previously, we had one ‘safe’ result, and an assumption that it behaved differently for different ponies. Now, it seems that the assumption isn’t true, and we have two ‘safe’ results. But the chance-” “Hey!” Pinkie Pie interrupted her, frowning. “That wasn’t safe! I’ve never been tickled that much before!” “-for a third result not to be safe is, I think, higher than what I thought the chance for it behaving differently at all was before.” “How likely that it...” “Kills us?” “Well, yes.” “Well... one in five-hundred, maybe. Probably less. More like one in a thousand.” A pause. “Alright,” Twilight said, “before we do anything, Pinkie, I want you to describe to me exactly what happened.” Listening to Pinkie, though, had not been helpful. All she had gathered was that it had tickled a lot and apparently at a lot of places. When Twilight had asked whether she wanted to try again, Pinkie had stared at her disbelievingly. “Are you kidding? That was horrible!” she had said. And then she had giggled. Rarity and Fluttershy, however, had both explained that they still wanted to try. Twilight had noted that Rarity would take an even smaller risk since she was a unicorn (like Twilight), and so she had volunteered to go first. Now, Fluttershy stood beside Twilight, and by the way she was shivering, one could have thought that it was her, not Rarity, who was about to put herself through probable pain and improbable risk. “Remember that you can also still change your mind if you want,” Twilight remarked, who wasn’t expecting it to happen any more than with Pinkie. Rarity shook her head, and Twilight nodded. The link was already drawn, all that was left was to close the connection. “Alright then.” “Three.” “Two.” “One.” Rarity gasped, and this gasp did sound like someone who was suffering. Sure enough, as Twilight paid close attention to her expression, she was pretty sure that, this time, they were getting the expected result. Rarity seemed to be put on the edge, and may have already fallen over were it not for Pinkie Pie giving her backup. Her mouth was half-opened, and Twilight briefly wondered whether she herself looked similar during the connection, before- “Stop.” Immediately, Twilight broke the link. As if the connection had held her up on an invisible thread that was now cut, Rarity’s body limply fell into Pinkie’s waiting arms. “You okay?” Fluttershy and Twilight asked in unison. Rarity didn’t answer at first, inhaling flat, quick breaths. “That...” she murmured. “... that was horrible.” And unlike with Pinkie Pie, who had said the same thing, Twilight knew that this wasn’t a joke. “What happened? Anything other than what I predicted?” “N-... no. Thanks, Pinkie.” She gestured for her to let go, and Pinkie hesitantly drew back. “It was like you said. It hurt, it didn’t feel like it was injuring me, and when I... thought about my mistakes... it pointed me to them... and I even felt it working on the memory... briefly... before I left... but Twilight.” She shook her head. “It hurt so much. I cannot believe you are putting yourself through that by choice. You warned me that it would hurt, but... but this much? Darling, just how can you stand it?” “I...” Twilight hesitated, the gears in her head already turning. Unlike Pinkie’s result, this one seemed to make sense, and it offered a number of immediate explanations. “I don’t think it’s because I’m that much tougher than you. If the difference is as big as you say, then that doesn’t seem likely. If I was that tough, I’d know about it. And you... well, are you usually that much more sniveling than other ponies?” Rarity shook her head. “There’s probably another reason, then. Whatever triggers the pain, it’s probably more potent in your case than in mine, so that it actually just hurts more for you than it does for me. That could also be a reason why no-pony has researched them before...” Her voice trailed off. “At least, maybe...” “Are you saying that I just hurt more ponies than you did?” Their eyes met, and Twilight made a deliberate effort not to lower her gaze. This was a situation that called for caution, but not at the cost of honesty. “Maybe,” Twilight responded, “but things are a bit more complicated than that. The, um, relevant question is how it’s measured, and I still think it has to be subjective.” “Pardon?” Both of their gaze fell onto Pinkie Pie. “Twilight, could you maaaybe explain that so I understand? Pretty please?” “Right.” Twilight took a few moments to order her thoughts, thinking of a way to explain. “Okay. Do you guys know what racism is?” Fluttershy nodded, while Rarity and Pinkie shook their heads, and so Twilight gave a brief explanation. “It’s only really a thing among dragons and griffons, but imagine a unicorn who’s really racist towards, say, pegasi, considers them worthless, and believes they don’t have real feelings. The question then is, if he did mean things towards them, and he connected to a phoenix, would it treat those actions as mistakes, or not?” “Oh,” Pinkie said, “I get it! If it’s subthingtive, then the pony thinks he did the right thing, so she’s not being punished!” “Subjective,” Twilight corrected. “But yes, exactly. And I suspect that this really would happen, because-” “-the phoenix isn’t smart enough to know so it has to be what the pony thinks?” “Yeah.” Twilight raised an eyebrow, giving Pinkie a curious look. “So,” Rarity said, “it’s not about how many ponies one has hurt, but how many one believes to have hurt?” “Yes... technically.” “Technically?” “Well. I think it’s about what a pony believes, but that’s not necessarily the same as what she says she believes, or even thinks she believes. Sometimes, ponies think they believe something, but they’re wrong, and in truth they know better. In case of racism, that’s probably often true, but not always.” “Really?” Twilight noticed a trace of skepticism in Rarity’s voice, that had previously not been there. “That sounds a bit like, ah, wishful thinking to me, darling. How can you claim that what they say isn’t really what they believe? Is there even a way to properly tell them apart?” “There is,” Twilight said, “because, because while a pony might say things she doesn’t believe – without realizing it –, she won’t usually do things that don’t fit what she believes. Give me, um, a moment to think of an example.” Rarity nodded. “Okay,” Twilight said after a while, “Imagine a pony who isn’t really any good at painting, but who thinks she’s done great after she’s drawn her first picture. Or rather, she thinks she believes that. Maybe she really does, but if not, then if you asked her to show it to others, she would probably make excuses for why she can’t do it. Even if nopony asked her, she’d probably make those excuses to herself. And if she had to show it to others, she’d probably find explanations for why their judgment doesn’t count, before she even hears it. This shows that she doesn’t really believe it, because if she did, then she’d just go ahead and show it to others – they’d probably like it, right? And still, if you asked her, she’d tell you that she believes others would like it, and it wouldn’t be a lie. She really does think that she believes, it’s just that she’s wrong. “Think about it.” Twilight gave all of them a glance. “Doesn’t that ring a bell? Don’t you remember somepony who’s done something similar before?” “I do, actually.” Pinkie looked impressed. “Wow, Twilight, you’re smart!” Twilight blushed, while Rarity’s brow furrowed. “I believe,” she said, “yes, I believe I have seen that.” Even Fluttershy gave a timid nod. “Mhh...” Twilight licked her lips pensively. “When it comes to how often you’ve hurt others, that’s probably something most ponies know, and so...” “So I really did hurt more ponies than you, yes?” “Probably,” Twilight admitted, “but Rarity, that’s to be expected. Remember that I lived alone in Canterlot for most of my life, so if it really depends on how much you’ve done overall, then it’s only logical. And it’s also not fair towards you, because it doesn’t consider all the times when you’ve helped other ponies...” Rarity nodded. “I see.” “You know I’m not saying this just to make you feel better, right?” Rarity nodded again. “I know, dear. What you said is true.” Feeling relieved, Twilight managed a smile. “It’s also just speculation,” she added. “It seems to fit, but for all we know, there could be another reason and none of what I just said matters.” Rarity nodded once more, then cleared her throat. “Well...” She made a gesture toward the pegasus. “Fluttershy’s been living rather isolated too, hasn’t she?” “Oh.” Twilight hadn’t realized the implications of her theory. “Um, I guess, yeah.” “U-... uhm.” Fluttershy bit her lip. “But I’m a pegasus...” “We don’t know what will happen to her at all!” Pinkie Pie concluded. “True, but if she does react like us two, then I think Rarity is right. She could have an easier time.” “Twilight,” Rarity noted, “what about your time in elementary school?” “Ah. I had... forgotten... about... that...” Twilight’s brow furrowed. “Well, it’s... possible that it doesn’t count because we think we’re not responsible... since we were too young. But it could also count, but because we all have it, it’s still more for you than me. In case of Fluttershy, she, uhm, has been nice as a filly too, from what I’ve heard.” Fluttershy blushed. “So,” Pinkie Pie said, “Fluttershy, are you going to do it? Huh?” “I think so.” “Now?” Twilight made an inviting gesture toward the desk. Blinking, she realized that Peewee was no longer sitting there. “Oooh, he’s gone!” Pinkie Pie giggled, and spun her head in search of him. “Maybe he flew outside?” A few bounces brought her toward the window. “Hehee... Twilight, he’s sitting on a branch. Gosh, it’s easy to forget that we’re all in a tree! Do you want me to try to get-” “No, thank you,” Twilight decided quickly. The most recent experiment suggested that it was best not to use Pinkie Pie as a test subject if the goal was to obtain results that were applicable to normal ponies. “Let Fluttershy do it.” “Oki-doki-loki. Fluttershy, the window is yours. Hehee...” “Three.” “Two.” “Um.” “O- yes?” “Um. I...” Fluttershy shivered, much more heavily than before. Twilight was reminded that she was the mare who used to be too afraid to even speak to any adult ponies beside Rainbow Dash. She gulped, seemingly fighting with herself, then shook her head. “Nothing. Sorry. Go ahead.” “Really, Fluttershy? Are you sure?” Fluttershy nodded. Twilight bit her lip in doubt, but didn’t protest. It wasn’t her decision. “Three,” she began again, “two.” “One.” Immediately, Twilight knew that her hunch had been correct. Whether race was an issue or not, Fluttershy had winced the moment that the connection had been set up, and it had to be because she was receiving the same reaction as Rarity and her. Twilight could hear somewhat akin to a whimper; so quiet that she wouldn’t have heard it had she not listened so closely. But then, Fluttershy’s body relaxed, and Twilight could see her smile. Beside her, Rarity gave a sigh. Pinkie had taken position beside the pegasus, but so far, it seemed as if Fluttershy didn’t need it. “It’s working for her, isn’t it?” Twilight nodded. ”I think so.” “I’m... don’t take it the wrong way, Twilight. I’m not concerned with what it means for me, least not much, and even less am I begrudging either of you. I just wish...” “That you could do it, too?” Rarity nodded. Twilight had no condolences to give at that. It was a shame, and she couldn’t downplay its importance, because she still had no idea where it would lead them. Her eyes flickered back to Fluttershy, whose expression matched perfectly what Twilight had felt during her own sessions; her face not without strain, but simultaneously showing an expression of utter bliss. Over a minute passed, until... “That’s... enough.” Twilight broke the link, and Fluttershy, who had tensed up after all near the end, now relaxed again, taking a few deep breaths. “That was... mh... nice.” Twilight laughed. “Nice? Really? Out of every word you could have used, you called it nice?” “Uh...” Fluttershy notably blushed. “I-I mean... it was a bit... mh... painful... but also wonderful.” “Yeah, that’s more what I thought.” A pause. “Did everything go as I predicted?” Fluttershy nodded, and Pinkie Pie, still standing beside her, gave her a hug. “That’s our Fluttershy! So nice that even a phoenix can’t find stuff to complain!” “He did find a f-few things, actually. But... t-thanks, Pinkie.” “Would you want to do it more often?” Fluttershy nodded. “Uhm. Not... not n-now, though.” “Of course.” Twilight smiled. “Well then,” she said, “thank you all for being test subjects.” Author's Note Author's Notes! Wait, those are mine. My notes! Silly intros aside, I had initially written a thing about how I apparently will be unable to sustain the upload schedule of one chapter per week and that I'd be aiming for one every other week in the future, oh and also how it'd be three weeks this time because I was on vacation for one. That's now I don't even know how many weeks ago. I had an exam afterwards, but the issue is really not one of time. It is more... the degree to which I worry about RL stuff, perhaps? I'm not sure. But something pulled me out of the mindset that I need to write – or even edit, given that the bulk of the chapter has been complete ever since two or so weeks after I published #17. And that made me realize that this is a thing for me. I have stretches of motivation and stretches of no motivation, and they seem to follow each other fairly regularly. Which is a shame, because I'd much rather be motivated all the time. . . There are also reasons related to the chapter itself. It's not that I'm dissatisfied with the story... yet (as was the case with The Shortcut), but... I guess I'm sort of unsure about this particular chapter... mostly about the rationality stuff at the end... the concept of belief in belief... I do like to have things of this nature in the story, I'm just not sure if it was the right time and way and if it was too much. I since also realized what I had understood instinctively for a long time, which is that there is quite a disparity in how I characterize Twilight ... or, really, most of the main 6 – and how others do it. Maybe you can tell, but the thing I dislike most about fiction – as in, about existing fiction, not about the concept – is, to put it bluntly, that authors tend to make characters be morons, and what I mean by that is: how often do characters take a step back, and spend a few minutes to actually think clearly about their situation and what is the best thing they could do? Even (arguably) great literature such as the Harry Potter series, is enormously guilty of this. It is probably a result of the author wanting to get to a series of plot points, and thus instinctively limiting the available options a character has to those that fit his agenda – missing that, all too often, the smartest thing is something really un–story-ish. Like, going to the headmaster and having an in-depth discussion about safety measures at Hogwarts. Or, calling princess Celestia to solve a huge problem instead of risking everyone's lives. Or something as simple as not risking the fate of the entire universe by freeing a near-omnipotent spirit of chaos for no discernible reason. But why are those things untypical for stories? Why is there such a thing as being untypical for a story? Stories are about anything and everything. Having frequently recurring patterns across widely differing settings is pretty damning evidence that there is contrivance going on. Of course, none of this is in any way shape or form limited to the ponyverse. And so, one of the biggest driving motivations behind my writing (that's been around for a while but that I'm now fully conscious of) is to have my characters feel, well, reasonably smart for who they are. It's fine if Rainbow Dash makes an over-hasted decision, but it's something different if the entire cast just misses an obvious third option. And in valuing this much higher than silly things like, say, pacing, this is probably giving my stories an unusual flavor, whether that's a good or a bad thing. Spinning this thought further, I suppose my priorities in writing are the same I have in reading. I drop most random stories I read a few sentences in because of grammar. Among the rest, I drop the most because of their writing style. But if a story has made it that far, then it almost always succeeds or dies with the believability of its characters. That was somewhat of a tangent... I suppose. Ah, back to the story. The point is, what I am largely doing with this story is to invent broad mechanics, then put myself into the mind of a character, and see what she will do, and if it isn't what I had imagined, awesome. No-one cares what I had planned anyway. Needless to say the die-roll has been randomized. I was fully prepared to let its outcome dictate the course of the chapter, and though I had vaguely planed to have a second one, that turned out not to be necessary. Unrelated to all of the above, Putting Your Hoof Down is excluded from this story's canon. You can probably guess why that is relevant. I feel and hope that I am slowly shifting back in the right state of mind as of now, so future chapters might be done in a timely fashion, although probably not at one chapter / week now that they're longer (though, who knows?) I hope Twilight figures stuff out sometime soon, there are a few things that might happen then . . .
Chapter 19In the weeks that followed, Twilight was able to observe how her continuous sessions gradually changed deeply rooted assets of who she was. To her, the progression seemed subtle, natural, and even slow, but in truth it moved at a rapid pace, contrasted to how long real change of character usually took. But no development was unwelcome, and so Twilight never looked back to reconsider her course. Above all else, she found herself becoming more relaxed, more at ease. Twilight was a pony who thought a lot about what she should do, and who cared a lot about what those whom she loved might think of her. It had driven her into a habit of constant self-doubt, a habit which had become so natural to her that she hadn’t even been aware of it. She had always liked making lists to make sure she did things in order and wouldn’t miss parts of a project or task, but she had never bothered to order her thoughts this way, nor had checklists ever been effective in preventing herself from worrying about the same things over and over again. No, it had taken a phoenix and the total exposure to her past sins for her to get there. Adding to that, she found herself with a new level of self-control, a second change that was perhaps more directly explainable due to the stark emotions she now put herself through so regularly. It wasn’t as if she’d had a habit of losing her temperament before – she hadn’t – but now, it just seemed... easier. Twilight found herself with an unknown clarity these days, and she was thankful for it. Fluttershy was now a regular sight at the library. She preferred shorter sessions, often just two minutes long, and she usually didn’t seem to be wanting to talk about them, so Twilight didn’t know how far along she was. Still, she kept returning, and the impacts it had on her seemed to be even stronger than those it had on Twilight. She was becoming calmer, steadier, and, whether or not it was real, she was at least giving the impression of increased confidence. After her fifth visit, Fluttershy asked if she could stay a bit longer, and Twilight, who had been reading one of the final books on phoenixes (one that she had previously skipped out on), put it aside with a smile, nodding. “You have something you want to talk about?” The way she had behaved had sort of given it away. Fluttershy nodded. “I... I have, uhm.” Her left hoof drew nervous circles onto the floor. “There’s... well, I’ve... found somepony I’m interested in.” “Oh.” Then, before she could stop herself, “is it Rarity?” “Errm...” Fluttershy blinked. “No. It’s not a mare.” “Oh.” “His name’s Autumn Leaf.” “Never heard of him.” A pause. “Um, Fluttershy – you know I’ve never been in a relationship, right?” “Oh, yes.” “Then why-” “Because... I don’t want romantic advice. About how to, um, pursue, um... but I’d like to hear your opinion on whether I should try at all... and... everything else you have to say about it. I... I don’t even know him, really.” “I see.” Twilight’s eyes trailed over Fluttershy as she tried to give real thought to the issue. As the seconds crept by and the silence was beginning to feel awkward, Twilight cleared her throat to say something, only to change her mind momentarily. “Give me a moment,” she murmured, and Fluttershy nodded. It took the better part of a minute before Twilight had a response she felt satisfied with. “Go for it, I think. But before you do... make sure you are okay, no matter how it ends. You’re happy right now, aren’t you?” “I think so.” “Good.” Twilight nodded. “Don’t be the filly who thinks she has to have this now, otherwise her life will be ruined. Look at it as an opportunity. If something comes off it, great! If not, you’re still off as well as before. Better, actually, because you’ll have learned something, and have something to look back on!” “Mhh.” “That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be confident. I’m sure Rarity will tell you how important confidence is. And I do think you should talk to her if... you do want to try.” “I see.” Fluttershy bowed her head. “Thank you. Can I come by tomorrow?” “Of course. Oh, and Fluttershy?” “Yes?” Twilight smiled. “Good luck.” “You can read my wishes.” Twilight pensively paced around the desk which Peewee was sitting on. “But you don’t understand my wishes.” Her gaze was stuck on the phoenix as she spoke, who showed no reaction. “Everything you do is instinctual.” “You have remarkable powers, but nothing inherently different from other magical creatures.” “So you really are an animal.” She halted for a couple of moments, eyeing the phoenix closely. “You don’t understand a word I’m saying.” “You aren’t bothered by any of this.” Nothing. Twilight’s heart sank a bit. “But I’m not sure this is actually true.” Just to cover her bases, in case he could understand her after all. Alright, that hadn’t worked. Twilight stepped in front of the phoenix, her mind focused on a simple idea. If Peewee was prone to fulfill her wishes as well as he could, and yet wasn’t able to understand her... ... what if she wished for him to understand her? It was a long-shot, but... Trying to put the wish into a feeling rather than words, Twilight squeezed her eyes in concentration. She stood there for what must have been over a minute, trying her best to keep up concentration. Then, she spoke up. “Can you fly up?” She had tried coming up with something simple so as to maximize her chances. Expectantly, she opened her eyes to observe the result, still trying to keep the wish in her mind – not the wish that he’d fly, but the wish that he’d understand her request. After a few moments of nothing, she tried again. “Can you fly up?” ... Well, she hadn’t been expecting it. Onward. Simple tasks, as it turned out, were reliably fulfilled by the phoenix. Be it to fly around, to eat, to make sounds, or anything else she had tried: as long as it was simple and her wish not expressed verbally, he would do it. Difficult tasks, on the other hoof, such as solving addition problems or turning an upside-down container with food in it around, appeared to be impossible, no matter how hard she focused on her wish. Likewise, if she was careful to request a task through language only, avoiding any emotional attachment to the goal expressed, he would consistently ignore her. And that just didn’t seem to make sense... There was a saying in magic theory: ‘magic is the mind of the universe’. It alluded to the fact that magic was the only force in nature which had repeatedly been observed to lead to intelligent behavior. If a door was built to open inwards and a pony went up to it and pushed, even if she pushed at four times the strength required to move it, it wouldn’t open. At best, it would break. But if that same pony applied magic, with the specified goal of ‘open the door,’ then, at some point, her magic would independently decide to first push down the lever and then pull. According to the current state of knowledge, every describable problem was in theory solvable by applying magic intended to do so, even if no strategy was specified to go along with it – indeed, even if a failing strategy was specified, such as ‘open the door by pushing’. Of course, theory and practice were two different sets of horseshoes, and the downside was that brute-forcing intelligence in this way rampantly increased up the amount of magic required. The theory went further. Two more observations were often cited to make this argument: one, strategies executed in this manner tended to be similar to what ponies would come up with, and two, all intelligent life was observed to have magic integrated into its biological structure (yet not all life period: among the flora, only every other plant was magical). This suggested that magic was indeed the root cause of all intelligence, including all intelligent minds of conscious beings such as ponies (and there was no reputable alternative explanation for how else such minds might come to be). Some went further still, arguing that there needed to be some sort of goddess guiding the universe, who was providing magic with its unique property. It was remarked that strategies executed through brute-forced magic were provably non-deterministic, showing minor but undeniable variations even under identical circumstances. Phoenixes were the most magical creatures known to ponykind. If their magic had once been used, perhaps collectively, to aid a good cause (or perhaps without any cause whatsoever), and had thereby followed an intelligent strategy, then some parts of Peewee’s behavior would make sense to Twilight. It would simply be the result of channeling intelligence through magic at a scale which ponies couldn’t possibly replicate. Perhaps ‘intelligence’ was a misunderstood concept and merely a standin for problem solving capabilities, capabilities which had then gone off and decided that the way to do good was to read the minds of ponies around them and accommodate their wishes as well as each phoenix was able to. But if that were the case, then Twilight would also expect Peewee to be able to solve more difficult problems, and yet... Not for the first time, her thoughts came to a halt here. And, not for the first time, it led her to the thought that she might soon find out... except now, ‘soon’ seemed to be right around the corner... Twilight had arrived at her nine-year old self: she had purged all memories of sins up from that age. The farther she had gone back, the fewer memories there had been per year, so she was presumably close to completion. And if she were to finish... what would happen? The most likely answer ought to be ‘nothing.’ Else, what did she expect? That Peewee would suddenly become sentient and reveal all of his secrets to her? Certainly not. Still – after so much effort, she knew she was going to be disappointed if nothing was in fact going to happen. It would still have been worth it, though. A plan took shape in the back of her mind. She would leave it be for today. Go out. She would really like to go out today. Go eat somewhere. Maybe meet some new ponies. Twilight had tried not to neglect her friends during the past weeks, but she had largely neglected seeing pretty much anyone else, except for the occasional visitor to the library. And tomorrow, she’d be taking her final session. It would take a long time, but she wasn’t afraid of the pain anymore. She only felt the drive to reach the end... and find out what was going to happen. Her eyes flickered to the watch on the wall. Ten past seven. Still enough time left until sunset... Where should she go? “Tea?” Twilight asked, offering the cup to her friend. It was so hot that a steady stream of white still ascended from the liquid’s surface. Rainbow snorted, not even bothering to answer. Twilight shrugged, taking the cup for herself (which, incidentally, was also the only one she had brought). “It was worth a try. Alright.” She tilted her head towards the phoenix, who sat on his usual position. “Thanks again for helping me. Are you ready?” The pegasus hesitated. A sudden, jerky movement went through her tail. “... Twilight? You’re not gonna turn crazy, are you?” “Very unlikely.” “And... what if you do?” “Well, that’s kind of what you’re here. I’m sure you can always take me on, right?” “Of course.” Rainbow’s left eyebrow twitched. “As long as you don’t use magic.” Twilight laughed involuntarily. Not joining her, Rainbow frowned. “You did nail me down in mid air once, y’know?” “Oh?” Twilight squeezed her eyes, trying to remember... “Right! I remember! Yeah, well, I was stressed out at that time, you know that. My letter-” “Yes,” Rainbow interrupted her, “I know. So, what’s stopping you from doing something even worse after you let that thing mess you all up inside?” “That thing is a phoenix, Rainbow.” “Meh. It can’t understand me, right?” “Probably not.” Rainbow cast Peewee a nervous glance. “Alright. So, once he messes you all up, who’s to say you don’t freeze me up again... and then start... dunno, something... dunno... something... something crazy, alright?” “Well, for one, everything connecting to Peewee has done to me so far has been the opposite of crazy. He does everything he can to help us. And it’s not like I haven’t connected to him before. I’ve had sessions every day for a while now. It’s just that this will be the last one.” “Uhu...” A pause. Twilight took a sip of her tea. “Can I open the window?” “Sure.” “Okay. I’ll stay here, you do your thing, and if I see you going crazy, I’m outta here.” “... sure. As long as you pick me up and get me to the hospital if I’m breaking down or something.” Rainbow nodded. “Deal.” “Deal.” The pegasus spat on her hoof, holding- “Uw! Rainbow, we’re inside! Can’t we just Pinkie Promise instead?” “Come on, Twilight! Pinkie Promise is for promises. We are making a pact.” Twilight’s eyes flickered from the hoof, which was in mild danger of leaking, down to the floor. “If I do this, do you promise to wash that afterwards?” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Fine.” Twilight nodded, spitting onto her right hoof. “Hold it,” she said after their bump, summoning a tissue. “Don’t try this with Rarity,” she said once all saliva was removed. “Okay. Ready now?” “Hold on.” Rainbow retook her position next to the window. “Ready.” “Rainbow, this is probably going to take over an hour before I’m finished. The Daring Do books are downstairs, in the Adventure section under ‘Y’. Better get them early.” “Sure.” “Also, if somepony comes in, please tell them to come back later.” This had happened before, despite the ‘closed’ sign hanging outside. Back then, she had simply interrupted her sessions, but this time... Twilight gulped. “Alright,” she murmured, more to herself than to her friend, “here goes.” It took less time than she had expected. Near the end, the nature of her memories notably changed, becoming more blurry, less distinct. She wasn’t able to recall exactly where her guilt was coming from, she merely traced it down by instinct. At some point, she suddenly realized how little attention she was paying to the pain, as if it had become a mere afterthought, even though it was as intense as ever. She must have been two, or three years old at the time of her final memory; all she had done to pin it down was to summon the image of a chair in her old living room, and that constant tick, tock, tick, tock of her old watch... which still hung on the wall in her parent’s room, at least if they hadn’t taken it down... Suddenly, it was over. Twilight took a long, panting breath, enjoying the absence of pain as she regained awareness of her surroundings. A pile of comic books, and some regular ones too, were stacked up in a neat pile beside a stool which Rainbow, who seemed to have been mindful enough to treat the library’s property with adequate care, must have brought from the kitchen. She still had her gaze stuck in one, apparently unaware of what had taken place just two yards away. Twilight looked around. The room was still in one piece, and the ground hadn’t begun to rotate or break away. No sudden insights had popped up in her mind as her journey had ended, and Peewee was still acting normally, flapping his wings in a way which usually indicated that he was hungry. It was probably time to be disappointed. “I’m finished,” she said calmly, causing Rainbow’s head to jerk upwards. “Nothing happened, I don’t think.” “You’re okay?” Twilight nodded. “Oh.” Rainbow closed the comic, putting it on top of the pile. “Cool, I guess. And now?” “I don’t know. I was...” She suppressed a sigh. “Er, I was hoping something special would happen, I think. But...” “Hey, at least you haven’t gone crazy.” “Yeah.” Twilight nodded, as much to assure herself as to answer to Rainbow Dash. “Yeah. You’re right.” “So...” Twilight shrugged. “Wanna stay for a bit longer?” “Uh... don’t take this the wrong way, Twilight. Your library is cool and all, but I’ve been sitting still for waay too long. It’s been, what, two hours?” She got off her stool, stretching her limbs. “I really gotta fly, y’know? If you’re sure you’re okay...” Twilight nodded. “... then I think I’m gonna be off for today.” “Right. Thanks a lot for your help, I know making you sit and watch isn’t, well...” “Yeah.” Rainbow grinned. “But s’all good. Smell ya later.” Twilight nodded. “Bye.” Absent-mindedly, she lifted up the book-pile, carrying it downstairs. A part of her was still waiting for something dramatic to happen, but she wasn’t expecting it. And indeed, the rest of the afternoon passed by with no incident relating to her studies, and so did the following two days. She had tried connecting to the phoenix again a couple of times, but now it was just like walking through an abandoned landscape: wide and empty. On Tuesday, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Twilight spent some time together in town. Afterwards, as they passed Sugarcube Corner on the way home, Applejack headed south to Sweet Apple Acres central, while Fluttershy and her headed east to the pegasus’ cottage. Fluttershy was still taking sessions, and Twilight was aiming for some private time to talk a bit about them, outside the context of the library. When they passed the second-last block of buildings at the edge of town, something unusual slid into her field of vision. Confused at first, Twilight could only blink, ready to write it off as a strange hallucination, expecting it to go away momentarily. It didn’t. Twilight felt a chill running down her neck. Cautiously, she took a few more steps towards it, Fluttershy by her side. Her jaw slowly dropped as she realized what she was seeing. In the midst of the alley, at a place she had passed a hundred times before, stood a black spiral tower. Author's Note I... don't have a good excuse for the massive delay. I developed a really sudden, really unexpected, and really frustrating anxiety with this story that doesn't seem to make very much sense even to myself, but it still happened. I apologize to everyone who has been let down. One thing which bears mentioning is that, since uploading the previous chapter (gosh it's been long!), I have learned the unsettling truth that our species' fate is likely going to be decided in a few decades. This has nothing to do with the story, but it is the most important thing in the known universe since humanity's inception, so I feel obligated to mention it anyway (plus it doesn't exactly speed up writing progress). See my latest blog post for details, point #1. Shoutout to EverfreePony, who is partially responsible for FINALLY getting me back on track.
Chapter 20In the midst of the alley stood a black spiral tower. “What,” Twilight murmured, her voice halfway between a spoken word and a whisper. “What,” she repeated, as if voicing her shock would provide an explanation. “What...” What...!!! “Hm?” Twilight turned her head. With one look, she knew that the pegasus wasn’t seeing it. “There is a black tower standing in the midst of the alley,” she said calmly. “Uhm.” Fluttershy made a face, signaling that she thought to be missing a joke. “There is a black tower standing in the midst of the alley,” Twilight repeated, “right there.” She pointed towards it. “You are serious?” Twilight nodded. “A spiral tower. It’s, like, two yards wide, circular, and all black. Maybe twenty yards tall. And gets thinner near the top.” “And it’s right here?” “Yeah.” Twilight pressed her eyelids together, counting to five before reopening them. The tower was still there. “I’ve been to this alley a dozen times,” she murmured, “no, more than that.” “So have I.” Twilight nodded. “Right. And it hasn’t been there before.” “Or you haven’t seen it before.” “Yeah.” There was a black spiral tower standing in the midst of the alley. Just a few yards in front of them. It looked utterly out of place. This was not something ponies would build; not in Ponyville, not ever. It was without decoration, without apparent purpose, just black and still. It looked... menacing, yet at the same time, Twilight felt no sensation of threat. She wasn’t afraid, she was just... Just... “What do we do?” ... disturbed. Twilight didn’t answer immediately. In trance, she kept staring at the tower... As the words got through to her, she realized just how easy of a question it was. “We have to tell the princess.” “Okay.” “You want to come with me?” “Uhm, sure... EEP!” Both of the pegasus’ wings burst outward as they suddenly changed location, reappearing on the bottom floor of the library. “Yeesh, Twilight! Don’t do that! Give me a warning first!” “Sorry,” Twilight shouted, already dashing towards the stairs, only to return ten seconds later, quill and paper in her grasp. “Dear Princess Celestia,” she read aloud while writing, “Fluttershy and I have just encountered an apparent impossibility: a black tower appearing in an alley on the south-east side of Ponyville, near Town Hall. Only I was-” She stopped as Fluttershy gave her a firm poke at the shoulder. Her gaze detached itself from the letter, finding not Fluttershy but the phoenix, who she now realized must have followed her from upstairs. It was unusual, the way he was focused on her, and as her heart began to beat faster, he slowly shook his head.
Chapter 22“How dangerous is this, exactly?” All six elements were assembled in a particular alley, though only Fluttershy knew why. The others, Twilight had merely told that there had been exciting progress, but that it would be better to hide specifics for the time being. “Well,” she responded in a factual tone of voice, “the dangerous part is I don’t really know what we’re dealing with. The reassuring part is that everything I thought was dangerous before turned out to be fine.” “Why should we take the risk at all, though?” “‘cause Twilight’s in love with science,” Rainbow Dash answered for her, causing a giggle from Pinkie Pie. “That’s not the only reason,” Twilight clarified, which in turn caused a giggle from Fluttershy, “but while I still can’t tell you the rest, I’m pretty sure that the first experiment is safe. How about we do this, and afterwards we reassess? I can also tell you what this is all about, then.” Rarity nodded. “Alright.” “Anypony else has objections? Anyone?” “Nah.” “Nopie-dopie-lopie!” “Uh, Twilight?” “Yes, Applejack?” “Is Peewee being here part of that plan o’yours?” “Oh.” Twilight’s gaze followed the farmpony’s hoof to the phoenix, who was indeed sitting on a nearby roof. Was he here to oversee the experiment? Twilight hadn’t forgotten what the princess had written to her three months back: Philomena is here, reading the letter, or perhaps reading my mind, or perhaps sitting on my shoulder because it is comfortable. The weeks which had followed had made that slide into the background, but now that it seemed as if phoenixes were able to change between being animals and persons, all of her earlier suspicions were back on the table. “Oh, hi there!” Pinkie waved in his direction, giggling. “I didn’t know he likes flying publicly!” “He doesn’t,” Twilight murmured, “I think he wants to watch.” “Err,” Applejack made, “watch what, Twilight?” “Right.” She cleared her throat. “The experiment. I need a volunteer, or better two. All I need you to do is walk across the alley.” “If that’s all.” Applejack made a step forward. “Oh, can I? Can I?” “Can I also fly?” “Yes, actually,” Twilight said to Rainbow Dash, “sorry, Pinkie, but I’d rather have two other ponies go first. Okay, so Rainbow, I need you to fly from here...” She walked a few steps to the side. “... to there.” She pointed directly towards the tower, but to Applejack and Rainbow it must have looked as if she was pointing to the end of the alley. “And Applejack, you can do the same on the ground. What’s important is that you both walk – or fly – slowly, and adjust your course if we tell you to.” She shot a brief gaze to the phoenix, who seemed to be observing the scene motionlessly. “Ready?” “You got it!” Rainbow Dash flapped her wings, ascending until she was at a spot right above Applejack. “Alright, you can go. Rainbow, don’t fly higher, please.” Twilight watched, her heartbeat steadily accelerating as they both came closer to the Spiral Tower. “A bit more left,” she instructed, causing the farmpony to move a bit to the side, and Rainbow Dash following suit above her. “A tiny bit more.” Now, just a few more steps... As she was right at its base, Applejack did a stroll to the side, walking around the tower, and though Twilight couldn’t see it well because the tower was also blocking her vision, she appeared to have returned to her previous course imminently. She also wasn’t sure whether Rainbow Dash had dodged it, but she didn’t appear to have made contact. “You can stop,” Twilight called, running over to where Fluttershy was standing. “Did you see how she-” “-suddenly changed directions? Yes, I saw it.” “And did she turn right back around? I couldn’t see it.” Fluttershy nodded. “And Rainbow Dash?” “I only looked at Applejack, sorry.” “That’s okay.” She gave Fluttershy smile, turning to her two subjects as they returned. “Thanks. That was very informative.” “It was?” Applejack sounded skeptical. “Yeah. In fact, Rainbow Dash, I’d like you to do it again.” “Err...” Rainbow shrugged. “Sure.” “Fly a bit lower this time.” “Sure. From here?” “Not quite.” Once more, Twilight walked to a spot from which they were headed straight towards the tower. They were now working for him, she thought as Rainbow Dash got ready. Finally, there was something he wanted... but it was different this time, not like it had been and still was with Celestia; she had chosen to do this, and it wasn’t like- “Twilight?” She snapped out of her thoughts, turning to the questioner. “Yes?” Fluttershy just pointed at Rainbow Dash, who was now close to the tower. “Stop!” Twilight called immediately. “Too far left!” Rainbow adjusted her course, looking over her shoulder for affirmation. “That’s fine. Keep on going!” This time, it was unambiguous: Rainbow Dash flew to the right, just before she would collide with the tower, but re-adjusted her course immediately afterwards, just like Applejack had done. “Okay! You can come back now.” “She doesn’t seem to have noticed,” Fluttershy said, who must have just seen Rainbow Dash dodge an object still invisible to her, even if she knew it existed. “Did you notice anything strange?” Twilight asked Rainbow once she was in ear range. ”Anything at all?” “Err, nope!” “Did any of you?” Twilight asked the others. “Uh-huh,” Pinkie Pie responded, while Rarity and Applejack nodded. “Rainbow Dash doesn’t seem to have noticed. Why don’t you tell her what you saw, Pinkie Pie?” “You made a curve!” “I what?” “You flew in a curve!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “The first time it was to the left, and the second time it was to the right, even though Twilight told you to fly straight! I thought it would be easy for you!” Rarity nodded in agreement. “Is it because you hurt your wing?” “What?” Applejack and Twilight asked simultaneously. “Rainbow Dash wasn’t flying evenly. Her left wing beats were stronger than the right ones.” “I... did hurt my right wing,” Rainbow Dash said, “but that was over a week ago. Not even a Cloudsdale judge would notice that. How did you...?” Pinkie Pie shrugged. “I like how you’re flying, Dashie. I know how it looks!” “Well” Twilight said, “that doesn’t seem to have anything to do with my experiment. So neither of you noticed that you were changing directions while you were walking?” Both of them shook their heads. “That’s amazing...” Twilight stared at the tower in new-found awe, wondering just how hard it would be to create a spell that worked to such perfection. Permanent invisibility of such a large object was already impressive, and making ponies walk around it even more so, but doing it with enough subtlety for the affected subject to remain clueless even as she was specifically focusing on her walking pattern, that was nothing short of incredible. The level of skill required to make this work went far beyond Twilight’s current abilities, and if there even was another unicorn out there who was this good, then she had never heard of her. Twilight doubted it. And even if there was one, why in Celestia’s name would she use her skills for such a purpose? No. Whoever – or whatever – was supplying this magic, it was not a pony. “Alright...” she murmured. “The next thing we’re going to do is to have Fluttershy, who already knows what’s there, try the same thing. Fluttershy, could you step here...” Once more, Twilight pointed to the spot. “... and walk in a straight line?” Fluttershy nodded. “More right,” Twilight called as she was only a few steps away, and Fluttershy corrected her course, now heading directly into the black wall- -until, right before, she suddenly deflected to the right. After about a second, she seemed to notice her own actions, halting for a few moments before she continued. Just like Applejack and Rainbow Dash, she completed a semicircle around the tower, but didn’t bother with walking any further, instead returning to the other five. “I noticed it right after I walked to the side,” she reported, “but, uhm, I didn’t want to... um, try to walk straight at it.” “Walk straight at what?” Rarity now asked, having watched the scene with increasingly apparent curiosity. “There is a black tower standing in the middle of the alley,” Twilight said. Nobody laughed. They had all seen the experiment. Pinkie stopped bouncing, making Twilight realize for the first time that she had done so before. “Hoboy,” Applejack murmured. “You mean right there? And we can’t see-” Twilight shook her head. “Only I can see it.” “Because of him?” Pinkie asked, pointing at the phoenix. Twilight nodded. “How tall is it?” Rarity asked. “Fifteen yards, maybe. Rainbow, would you fly upwards, please? Slowly? ... stop. Okay, a bit higher. Yeah, right there. That’s how high it goes. Thanks, Rainbow. And it gets thinner near the top, and it has a spiral to it.” “What color?” “Black.” Twilight looked at the questioner. “Pinkie, do you want to try next?” “To walk?” Twilight nodded. “Uh, sure! I’ve been here plenty of times before, after all! Nothing bad’s ever happened.” Like the others before her, she walked in a straight line directly towards the tower at Twilight’s directions. When she was right in front, she did a step to the side, and then- “Ouff!” -she bumped right into it. “Oh my gosh, Pinkie, are you okay?” Fluttershy rushed over to her, while Twilight was rendered speechless for the moment. “Darling, you don’t actually want us to go... in there, do you?” Rarity asked, once it became clear that Pinkie hadn’t hurt herself anymore than she would have by walking into a wall (which, Twilight mused, had surely happened before). “Err,” she made. “Well, only volunteers, of course. But... yeah, I doubt we’re going to get far just looking at it from the outside.” “Does it even have an entrance?” “I haven’t seen one, but I haven’t been looking very closely.” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “It could be hidden, somewhere. That’s what I suspect. But I could also just teleport us inside.” “Teleport inside of an invisible black tower? I don’t know about this, Twilight. I know you like-” “It’s not about science anymore, Rarity. We have been instructed to do this by a phoenix. A phoenix!” “I’m afraid I don’t follow your enthusiasm, Twilight.” “A species which can come back from the dead!” Twilight exclaimed. “We’re talking about a species here that is so... so... respected that even Princess Celestia is afraid of them. What would you do if god itself came to Equestria and told you-” “-God?” Rarity interrupted, sounding highly skeptical. “Really, Twilight? The last time I checked, the two beings which are the closest to divinity are two ponies living in Canterlot, and as far as I know, most ponies don’t believe that there is someone sitting in the sky who watches over us all any more than Luna does. Just because Peewee can do some things we can’t explain-” “Coming back from the dead is not just doing ‘something we can’t explain!’ It is doing the one thing in the universe which is supposed to be impossible! How can you just-” “Don’t be overly dramatic, please. That is my job.” It was a clear attempt to break some of the tension, but while she heard Rainbow Dash laugh and Applejack snicker, she herself was too upset for it to work. “It is hardly the only thing which is impossible, either. What about time travel?” “Time travel to the future appears to be possible, and time travel to the past is, eh, it’s not even fair to treat it as something that could be possible, because the universe couldn’t be logically coherent-” “Ahem,” Applejack made, “you ladies might wanna get back on topic.” “No matter how special they are, it simply does not make sense to risk one’s life in such an irresponsible fashion, when-” “I’m not going to ignore-” But Twilight cut herself off, taking a few deep breaths. “Sorry, Rarity. Continue?” “Thank you. When we don’t even know what for.” “Right,” Twilight said, “sure. I get what you’re saying. And what I’m saying is that if a phoenix tells me to do something, then I’m gonna do it.” “But why?” “Because...” But Twilight was lost for words. She didn’t understand why Rarity didn’t understand! How she could turn her head from this. Did she not see how everything they had learned pointed towards phoenixes being a force of good through and through, more so than ponies, how they were more magical than anything else in the world and just how could you want to refuse them?? “Listen,” she now said, “listen. Right now, based on what I know, phoenixes could... literally be magic itself, or even... even... they could be integral to the universe in a way we will never understand! If the phoenix told us to do this, then there must be a reason. An important reason! Not doing it just can’t be right!” “Twilight, you’ve been more... objective these past weeks than you ever used to be, which I had attributed to your sessions. And there is nothing wrong with that, but now you are telling us to do something because it doesn’t feel right not to? I’m sorry, but that does not fit.” “I,” Twilight said, “I... I...” Frustrated, she took a look at the other four, who had all been listening silently, even Pinkie Pie. Twilight overwhelmingly felt that she was right about this, but as of now she didn’t know how to explain, even to herself, why that was. “You’re winning the argument,” she murmured, “but I don’t think you’re right.” “And that fits even less.” “Yeah, I know.” “I know this is all super-duper important,” Pinkie unexpectedly said, “but you guys do realize that we’re in a public street, right?” “Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said with a chuckle, “you were getting a bit loud there, Twi.” Somewhat alarmed, Twilight took a look around. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Pinkie Pie, who’s living here?” “Bell Perin, Berry Dreams, and Ballad! I always thought ‘Ballad’ was a funny name, don’t you? Do you think she changed it so that there would be three ponies whose names all start with a ‘B’ living next to each other? “No,” Twilight responded, who didn’t recall any of the names listed, “but we should probably leave. I, uh, could take you all out to eat. Are you hungry?” “Nah,” Rainbow said, but Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Rarity all said yes. “Eh. Fine. I’ll come with you.” “I don’t even know if you can change your name after you already got your Cutie Mark!” “I didn’t mean to be rude,” Twilight said to Rarity while Applejack was responding something, “I think it’s great that you, um, take a stance for what you think is right.” Rarity nodded. “Think nothing of it, dear.” “Thanks,” Twilight said with a smile, throwing one last look over her shoulder before the group walked out of sight range. Both the tower and the phoenix were still there.
Chapter 24Darkness. Twilight immediately realized that things had gone wrong. It shouldn’t be dark. She had teleported with a light spell already cast. And the weight on her back shouldn’t be gone... but it was. She lit her horn again, only to be rewarded with a sinking feeling of crippling fear. Gray light illuminated something far larger than the tower. Only a dark wall beside them was visible. “Your saddlebags are gone, too,” Rainbow Dash said. “Twilight, what’s going on?” “I don’t know,” Twilight whispered. “Rainbow, the light shouldn’t be gray.” “What?” “Unicorn magic is always bound to a color. Mine is purple. If I cast light, it’s purple. It’s never gray. It shouldn’t be gray.” “It’s messing with-” “That shouldn’t be possible!” Twilight hissed, for a moment close to panic. “You can’t mess with magic! That’s not how it works! That’s how ponies who have no idea think it works!” “Twilight! Calm down!” Twilight said nothing. It wasn’t that landing in a larger place was unexpected. Dilation magic was feasible. Earlier, during their preparations, Twilight had argued that, based on the level of ability the tower had demonstrated thus far, they should account for the possibility of its insides being significantly larger than the space it occupied. But it didn’t matter, because almost all of their preparation was lost. The food they had packed was now just as useful as their pre-charged crystals, their candles, clothes, lighters, the phile of preserved dragon fire, their compass... “Are you sure you didn’t do anything different-” “Yes.” “Okay. Relax, Twilight.” Twilight nodded. “It’s also not as bright as it should be... let me see...” She increased the flow of magic and the light brightened, but not as much as it should. Apparently, a bigger toll of magic was now required to achieve the same effect, which, once again, should not be possible. The increased light had neither illuminated another wall, nor the ceiling. Twilight brought it back down, closing her eyes. “I can’t teleport,” she said after a moment. “it’s blocked.” “Awesome,” Rainbow said cynically. “So we’re trapped.” “Yeah.” She sighed. “I guess we have to walk.” “Ahem.” “What?” For a moment, they looked at each other. Then, Twilight noticed the pegasus demonstrably flapping her wings. “Oh! Right!” Rainbow grinned. “But we might be in here for while. Won’t it be too exhausting for you?” “Nah. I could fly you around for hours, if I have to.” She held her wings outward and lowered her hind legs, clearly signaling Twilight to climb onto her back. After a moment of hesitation, she complied. The pegasus’ body was warm to the touch. She had expected that; out of the three races, pegasi had the highest body temperature, and unicorns the lowest. What she hadn’t expected was how intimate it felt, her hooves wrapped around Rainbow’s neck and their bodies pressing together. This must have been why pegasi carrying other ponies was such a rare sight, even though everypony liked to fly. “Ready?” “Yeah.” Twilight held her breath, then they were suddenly in the air. It had gone so fast that she was still processing it, taking a few moments to realize that Rainbow had said something. Something. “Come again?” “Where should we go? Up?” “Oh. Um, yeah. Let’s see how high this thing is.” “Alright.” They ascended. Slowly, as their only guidance was Twilight's own, dim light. She hadn’t expected for it to take more than a few moments, but as the seconds crept by, they just continued ascending higher and higher, the ground long out of sight. Save for the one gray wall, the darkness was absolute. “This is creepy.” Twilight said nothing. She noticed her heart beating faster than normally, and wondered whether Rainbow would be able to feel it. After a while, she decided to once again to increase the flow of energy feeding the light, a choice she was immediately grateful for. “If I’m not even walking myself...” she murmured. “This way we’re less likely to crash into the ceiling.” Rainbow’s response was to fly faster. Twilight bit her lip. That was not what she had intended, but she didn’t complain. They continued. A minute passed... ... and more seconds kept creeping by. How long had it been, now? Ninety seconds? Too long. “Stop,” she heard herself say. “This isn’t good.” She could feel a moment of weightlessness as Rainbow halted in her ascent, then they were back to their slight hovering, up... down... up... down... “If it’s a simple dilatation spell, and the tower is empty, then going up will take much longer than going forward.” “Should I get us back down?” “Uhm. I’d try to fly along the wall. If that’s easier when we’re near the ground, you can go back down, but if not you can stay at this height. I just don’t want you to get exhausted. Flying upwards can’t be easy.” “It’s fine,” Rainbow said, and there was a sudden pull to Twilight’s hooves as she began to fly forward, parallel to the wall. “I’m not exhausted that quickly.” “But f-flying...” She interrupted herself at the sound of her own words. Had she been stuttering? That was so unlike her. “... upwards must he harder than going straight.” “Sure, but it was just a few minutes. I’m fine, don’t worry.” Twilight closed her eyes, then opened them at the sudden rush of claustrophobia. What was wrong with her? Was it because of Rainbow? ... no. She’d like to believe that. That would be harmless. Cute, even. But it wasn’t true. She was afraid, simple as that. It seemed as if the tower was hollow, with the same shape as seen from outside, but far, far larger. There was then no guarantee whatsoever for a way out to even exist. Suddenly, Rainbow Dash slowed down, causing Twilight, who hadn’t been ready for a thrust in this direction, to be pushed forward, instinctively summoning her magic to stop- “Aaahrgh!” “Sorry!” Twilight shrieked, her heart now racing. “Sorry sorry sorry!” “Ow... what was that?” “You, you slowed down so abruptly and I was losing my grip I so, I, um, I helped out a little with magic, and-” “It felt like someone hit me at the back of the head with a rock!” “I had to push against something!” “Ow,” Rainbow repeated. “Ow. Okay. Don’t do that again.” “I promise. Sorry.” Then, “thanks for not... uhm, dropping me or something. You reacted great.” “Used to stuff like this,” Rainbow murmured. “Okay, so the tower’s not all empty.” Twilight nodded, only to realize the uselessness of that gesture. “Yeah.” The reason why Rainbow had slowed down so abruptly was the wall that had appeared in front of them – although, in the end, they had come to a halt several yards early. Perhaps she wasn’t the only one who was nervous. As Rainbow flew closer, Twilight could see that the former wall was simply bending into the new one; a rounded corner. At least now, there were walls on two sides. Little as it was, it seemed to diminish the earlier sense of being lost a bit. “What now?” “Hold on,” Twilight murmured, reaching out with her senses. To her surprise, she found not what she had been looking for, but instead – “Fly up again.” “Huh?” “There’s a ceiling. Close.” As Rainbow ascended further, Twilight realized she’d been wrong. What she had thought to be a ceiling was merely the wall bending outward and then inward again, forming a sort of ring, a bulge, or a platform. Judging from what little part they could see, it appeared to be protruding equally far out of the wall at all points. Where the wall itself bent, so did the bulge. Without hesitation, and before Twilight could warn her (if she had wanted to), Rainbow landed on its top. It was perhaps ten yards wide, though less than half of it was even enough to stand. “Is this one of the spirals?” Rainbow asked. “You told me the tower had spirals to it. If they bulge inward...” “I don’t think so. It’s too even. Horizontally, I mean. If it was one of the spirals, it should be like a large slide.” “Don’t you want to climb off?” “Um,” Twilight made. “Um.” “You can stand no problem here. Just don’t go too far forward.” “Can you turn around first? I want you to be able to catch me if...” Rainbow turned on the spot. Twilight climbed off, then turned around to face the wall again. This way, the platform sloped upward, like a ramp, until it merged back into the wall. “Be still prepared to catch me,” she murmured. “Just in case this thing disappears or something.” “Okay.” “Also, thanks,” she said, turning to face her friend. “I’m glad I didn’t go alone.” Rainbow nodded. She didn’t say anything about being trapped, that Twilight had potentially endangered both of their lives, or about the incident from before. Twilight felt a sudden, unexpected wave of sympathy. “What do we do now?” “Give me a moment.” Once again, Twilight reached out with her senses, and once again, she was surprised. “There’s a real ceiling. Not that far up.” “You want me to fly us there?” “Can’t hurt.” Rainbow nodded. “Jump on.” It was less awkward this time. Twilight had already learned how it would feel, and a bit about how to stay firm without tightening her grasp too much. She could feel that Rainbow was flying more slowly now, but it still didn’t even take half a minute to reach the top. Neither of them probably had expected anything else at this point: once again, there were no edges, the wall simply bent to slope over their heads, forming what must be a sort of dome. It was hard to judge how exactly it was shaped, given that all they saw was a tiny, poorly lit sliver. “Where now?” Twilight suddenly realized how naturally Rainbow turned to her for directions. “I... I think follow this for a bit, then if... everything is normal, you can fly back down.” “Alright.” With steady wingbeats, Rainbow flew them forward, inches below the dome and still parallel to the wall. Twilight wondered whether they really were at the tower’s top. She doubted it. The actual tower was too thin near its top. This was so wide that she couldn’t even tell whether it was still bent, and as she asked Rainbow, neither could she. The flight downward frightened her more than anything before. It seemed like a fall. Like they both were falling into an infinite abyss, with nothing but a gray wall beside them. Then they reached the ground. “What now?” “Let me think,” Twilight said, trying to visualize the route they’d taken. “... okay. Fly further. But stay low.” Once more, Rainbow did as she was told. Twilight kept her gaze at at it, searching for kind of irregularity, but finding none. And they flew. And flew. The passing of time didn’t serve to ease her worries. In the best case, they were now passing along the tower’s diameter, and even then, every second meant she had to adjust her estimate of the interior’s size further upward. They most certainly hadn’t reached the ceiling before. If proportions were preserved, the tower was far, far higher than the meek distance they had bridged earlier. A hundred times as high, and more by the second. “How does dilatation work, Twilight?” Rainbow eventually asked, without slowing down. “Magic?” “Yeah.” “You take the space you need from somewhere else. You can’t create it. You also can’t move it, not really. But you can tell the world that it’s now where you want it to be. Imagine you have a map of a mountain, and you want the route upwards to be shorter. You can’t change the mountain, but you can redraw your map, and you can try to convince the world to accept your new map in place of the old one. Dilatation works just like that. You take a large space from somewhere, and you convince the world that this space is now inside the tower. But in truth, it’s not. In truth, subjects entering the borrowed space are in essence teleported to wherever the space really lies, but for us it’s impossible to tell the difference. The borrowed space bends around the real space perfectly.” “And where do you take it from?” “Any place that will stay abandoned. Um, you see, you changed the entry points of the space you tried to move. If I take the inside of the library and convince the world it’s now in Sugarcube Corner, then the new way of getting into the space of the library is now through Sugarcube Corner – not through entering the library anymore. But, if somepony tries to do it the old way and enters the library, things go wrong. The world realizes it’s been lied to, so it tears up your new map and goes back to the old one. You have to take it from a place that no-one will enter. Like a sealed room. If you don’t have that and you’re strong enough, you can look for holes in the earth. Empty caves. The earth is full of that. The farther you can go, the more likely it’ll stay empty. Animals only go so deep.” She hesitated. “But this is too large for a cave. And you can’t add places together.” “Just take a piece of the sky?” “Can’t. There are birds which fly miles above ground, and you need some proximity to matter. Don’t ask why. That’s why caves work. It could... be a large, empty stretch of land somewhere. Far away. I don’t know. Or... on the moon, I guess.” “Isn’t that too far?” “I don’t know. Too far for me.” They kept flying. Twilight thought Rainbow’s wing beats were getting more forceful, less smooth. But perhaps she was imagining things. “So we’re not even really in the tower.” “No. Not really.” “We’re on the moon.” “Maybe.” Twilight gulped. “Probably.”
Chapter 25“That’s why the light is gray!” Twilight said at once, hit by a sudden revelation. “And why it takes more energy! I didn’t think about it because it never matters, but magic does work differently on other planets! It’s harder for me because we’re not in Equestria anymore! Or anywhere else on the plane! We’re on the moon, Rainbow! We’re really on the moon!” For a few moments, her fear was replaced entirely by the sense of discovery, the rush of euphoria. No unicorn was powerful enough to borrow space from the moon. This went far above her own abilities. Above Celestia’s. But the tower had done it. Here they were, perhaps the first mortals in history to literally be on the moon! On the moon! “And you know what else this means? It means there is a limit to how far the world is actually fooled! It’s an open question in magic theory whether the world knows on some level that the new map isn’t real, and the consensus is that, no, the deception is perfect. But it isn’t! This is proof! Not even the tower can fool the world perfectly. Rainbow, this is huge!” “Twilight,” Rainbow said, her voice tense and worried, and also quiet. “I get it. But... we don’t know what’s in here. Don’t be so... loud.” At once, the fear came back, and Twilight almost wanted to bite off her own tongue. She was so stupid. The second she had found out something exciting, she had thrown all precaution overboard. Who cared if they had found new revelations if they didn’t make it out of here? Teleportation from the inside was still at least partially blocked, their supplies were still gone, and they still had no idea what might be in here. Worse. It might be a huge discovery, but it was bad for them. If the space was taken from the moon, then there was barely a practical limit to how large the tower might be... actually no, that was not quite right. The limit would be the maximum distance that space needed to have with matter in order for the spell to work. How large was that... four miles? It was a constant figure. But it was also a boring, pointless, theoretical number that never mattered and Celestia help her she had actually forgotten it. How could she have known that it would end up being important? “I’m an idiot and I’m sorry,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow had halted, now hovering on the spot. “Rainbow, how far do you think we’ve flown so far?” “Three or four miles,” Rainbow replied. “Why?” “I’m thinking how large this thing can be. I told you there’s a limit to how far you can get away from matter. But... argh! I forgot the exact number! I’m such an idiot! I think it was four-point-something.” “Miles?” “Yeah.” “So we’re almost there?” Rainbow asked, while the gears already spun further in Twilight’s head. “No, wait! Wouldn’t that mean the tower is that high, not that wide? Shouldn’t it be much smaller, then?” “It must be flipped,” Twilight murmured. “The real tower is twenty-one yards tall, two-and-a-half yards wide. If you imagine a cylindric shape like that put up straight on the moon... then the tower would be as high as the distance you can have from the surface. So twenty-one yards correspond to, let’s say, four-and-a-half miles, that means two-and-a-half yards correspond to... just around half a mile. We’d already be on the other side. But if you lay down the cylinder, its diameter will be four-and-a-half miles, but it’ll be much higher, and-” Twilight stopped talking as she realized yet another mistake. Rainbow must have felt that something wasn’t right. “Twilight?” “Crap,” Twilight whispered. “It’s the moon. The number, four-point-something, it’s anti-proportional to the gravity of the celestial body squared. The gravity on the moon...” For a moment, Twilight thought she had forgotten that number too, but then she remembered. Once, over a decade ago, she had looked it up herself. “... sixteen percent of what it is here. So it is... roughly one sixth. That means it’s not four-and-a-half miles, it’s... thirty-six times that. Over one-hundred-and-sixty miles.” “Oh,” Rainbow said, and now Twilight could hear the fear in her voice. “That’s far.” And as if the news were too much for her to stomach, she descended back to the ground, allowing Twilight to climb off. “You can’t do that,” Twilight whispered, “right?” “I...” Rainbow gulped. “It’s so far...” A few moments passed in perfect silence. “... I can fly seventy miles per hour, under good conditions. But... not while carrying you. And not forever. And not if I have to fly so slow.” “Uhm,” Twilight made as she realized she had forgotten yet another factor: the moon’s curvature. Doing a few quick calculations, though, she realized that it made next to no difference. “We don’t know if it’s that far,” she said instead. “We don’t even know if flying to the other side is what we need to do.” “We might be trapped anyway.” The words sent a surge of guilt through Twilight’s breast, but she didn’t show it. “Yeah.” “But you think we should try?” “Only if we have a realistic chance. But if we crash...” “You’re the unicorn. Find a solution.” Twilight nodded, quickly considering a number of possibilities. A much brighter light? Unsustainable. Sensing for things constantly? Less costly, still far from possible. Summoning a small piece of energy with a link back to her, and keeping it at a reasonable distance, so she would know if it hit the wall first, and could warn Rainbow in time? It took her a few seconds to dismiss this one. Judging by how much harder magic was for her here, she’d probably be able to sustain it for about one hour – if that. She needed something better. Better by a factor of about ten. “... Twilight?” Rainbow’s voice reached her. “Twi? Can you make light again? It’s so creepy to see nothing. You could have disappeared and I wouldn’t notice.” “Sorry,” Twilight said, redoing her spell. “I’ve been thinking about how to do this.” “... and?” “It’s really hard. I only have one idea that can work, and it’s... not a good one.” “What is it?” “I could cast a preemptive shield to lessen the impact,” Twilight said reluctantly. “We would still crash into the wall, but the impact would be lighter. Judging by how much harder magic is for me here, it would also take a lot of energy at once when we use it.” “... can’t you just prevent the crash?” “I don’t think so. I’m sorry, Rainbow. But I can’t think of anything. I don’t think there is a spell I could sustain for more than an hour that would do the trick.” “One hour is not enough.” “I know.” “Why does it have to be one-sixty?” Rainbow asked, her voice sounding dull and strained. “If it were just a bit less... one-twenty I could probably do. It’d be hard but... Twilight, one-sixty is stretching it.” Twilight had no idea what to respond. She knew that it could be even more... they didn’t know whether the wall they were at right now would lead them straight to the other side. What if they were in a maze? ... and still, what if reaching the other side wouldn’t even help? “Okay, let’s do it. Hop on.” Twilight felt as if she had given up all responsibility, passing it onto Rainbow. The light she cast was now even dimmer than before, in an attempt to preserve every bit of energy she had for the eventual impact. She could see almost nothing, just a blurry line of gray, while Rainbow flew at a speed she could only even judge by the feeling of air against her skin. They didn’t talk anymore; the last thing Twilight wanted was to burden the pegasus further. Every once in awhile, she checked whether teleportation access was still blocked, and every time, the result was the same. Aside from that, there was nothing she could do. Soon, Twilight realized just how long this was going to take. Doing nothing whatsoever for as much as five minutes was already tough. But for hours... and hours.... And hours... Her thoughts drifted, double-checking whether what they had concluded was solid. She couldn’t see any mistakes. Had there been anything else she had missed? Another way to get out? Blocking teleportation was like putting up a fence. It was always local. Even if the place to get out weren’t on the other side, bridging as much distance as possible was their best shot. It seemed like they had to do this. And there had to be a way out. The phoenix wouldn’t have led them there if it was a journey without return. At least, that was what Twilight wanted to believe... but she also knew that if she had gone without Rainbow, she’d have zero chances of making it... and it seemed more than a bit unlikely that he had accounted for that, too. Twilight envied Rainbow Dash. She had no idea how long it had been by now, but she knew she would give everything to be able to fly... or in her case, run. Perhaps she was selfish to even waste a thought on how she felt being carried while their lives were at risk because of her? It was all her fault... or was it? Rainbow had decided to come by herself... the phoenix was the reason why they were here in the first place, not her... right? Twilight pressed her eyelids together. There was no use thinking in that direction. They’d reach the end, and they’d make it out. It would just take a long, long time of her clinging to Rainbow’s back, doing nothing. Time passing in darkness. One-hundred-and-sixty miles. That meant the tower was well over a thousand miles tall... the size of a thousand mountains... Teleportation was still blocked. If Rainbow realized that they wouldn’t make it, would she say something? Perhaps it was better not to ask. It could still be much shorter... Her ears were ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. Twilight pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. Twilight pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were still ringing. The swooshing of wind. The gray blur. She pressed her eyelids together, then reopened them. Her ears were ringing. The gray blur. The swooshing of wind. She pressed her eyelids together... She realized she hadn’t checked for a teleportation route in a while. But nothing. Blocked as ever. “I didn’t tell you to confess to him,” Twilight protested. “That was your idea.” “You told me to do this.” “I told you the opposite! I said don’t let all of your happiness depend on it!” “Well, buh-huh.” Fluttershy gave a sly smile. “You don’t get to dictate my happiness, Twily.” “Don’t call me that, please.” “No?” Fluttershy walked over to a bookshelf, pulling one out at random. “Am I not as pretty as your brother?” “What?” Twilight walked over, trying to discern the book’s cover. “Lust?” Fluttershy said. “How come you never asked him, Twilight?” ‘Daring Do and the Towering Mountains.’ “... asked him what?” Fluttershy closed her lips, blowing a silent kiss into the air. “You!” Twilight took the book out of her grasp, furious. “That’s ridiculous! And this is mine! Don’t touch my books!” “I hate Daring Do, anyway,” Fluttershy said. “Did your brother read it to you when you were young?” “This is ridiculous!” Twilight repeated. “He’s my brother! And I’m into mares!” “Hah!” Eagle Eye made. “Mares or not, you haven’t found anypony so far.” Twilight heard a sob. A row behind Eagle Eye, Fluttershy lay under a table. “I don’t care what you think,” Twilight murmured, stepping on top of the row in front of her. There was something written on the board at the end of the classroom, but she couldn’t discern it. She stepped back onto the floor, heading for Fluttershy. “I didn’t know,” she whispered as Twilight got close. “I didn’t know. I’m so sorry. I wouldn’t have bothered you all this time.” “What do you mean?” “I always liked you, Twilight. I thought that one day, we... but...” “Oh.” “I didn’t know. I’m. sorry. But if you like mares, then we’ll never be together...” I’m sorry,” Twilight murmured. “But we should really sit down again. The teacher might notice.” Fluttershy responded something, then Twilight woke up at an instant. “Ohmygoshohmygosh!” she shrieked, her heart racing. “Rainbow!” She could feel the stream of air lessening. Then, she could feel them descent. Only now did she notice Rainbow’s quick, shallow breathing. “I’ve fallen asleep!” Twilight climbed off, still not believing what had happened. “I’ve fallen asleep. I’ve actually fallen asleep. If we had hit something... how long has it been?” No response. Twilight brightened her light. Rainbow was standing beside her, her entire body slick with sweat. She only shook her head. “Oh, yeez! Didn’t you notice? Didn’t the light go out?” Rainbow shook her head again. So she had kept it up during her sleep. Well, that could happen. It had something to do with different parts of the brain and subconsciousness or something. Twilight didn’t remember. How long had she been awake? It was so hard to judge, but her guess was over two hours. And how long had she been asleep? “Long,” Rainbow murmured. “Six hours... maybe.” Six hours. Twilight shuddered. She must have been asleep for over half of it. “How are you?” She asked carefully. “I’m okay,” Rainbow murmured, and Twilight felt a wave of relief. “But I need a break. A real break.” She leaned herself against the wall, slowly sliding downward. “Half an hour... or maybe a bit more... then we can go further.” “How fast do you think you’ve been?” “Fifteen, maybe. It’s... so much harder while carrying... another pony.” Twilight sat down beside her, and Rainbow shifted around, changing into a lying position. She said something too muffled for Twilight to understand. “Uhm, come again?” “You’re my pillow,” Rainbow repeated, resting her head against Twilight’s leg. “Try to be as soft as a cloud, okay?” “Rainbow?” Twilight asked after the time passed seemed to be around an hour – though once more, she couldn’t be certain. “Are you awake?” “I’m now.” “So you got some sleep?” “Slept like four different times. Drifting in and out. Dreamt of... Fluttershy...” “Oh,” Twilight said, “I did, too.” “Did she also raise an army of bears to fight off Chrysalis?” “No.” “I’d have liked to see the end of that one. Would have been... awesome...” Twilight could feel the weight from her body lifting as Rainbow was standing up. She recast her light which she’d been putting out to give her the chance to actually sleep. “What did she do in your dream?” “Uhm. She was really mean and implied I had a crush on my brother. When I told her I’m not even into stallions, she suddenly wasn’t Fluttershy anymore but a filly out of my old class whom I hated. We were also in school now and Fluttershy was lying under the tables a row before us. When I went up to her, she said she’s always liked me, but since she likes stallions and I like mares, we could never be together. Then I woke up.” “Makes sense.” “Yeah.” Twilight was sure that normally, they’d both laugh now. But things were still pretty far from normal. “In another,” Rainbow recited, “I was talking to Rarity and... she said she couldn’t come with us into the tower because the tower wasn’t... in.” “Like, fashionable?” “Yeah. She said it’s summer season now and going in with us would be bad for business.“ “Well,” Twilight said, “if she never came out again, that would be pretty bad for her business.” She didn’t know why she had said that. Something about the tower must have driven her to make this morbid joke. “Yeez, Twilight. Way to ruin the fun.” “Sorry.” “Alright. Hop on.” “If you’ve flown fifteen miles per hour for six hours-” “-we’ve got sixty miles left,” Rainbow completed her sentence. “Yeah, I know. Don’t fall asleep this time,” she added as Twilight climbed on. “Or we might actually crash.” “I’ll try.” Staying awake was easier this time, but the flight was no less monotone, and no less frightening. At one point, Twilight wondered what would happen if something were to attack them. She had stopped being afraid of that, just because it hadn’t happened so far, but that was far from a guarantee that this place was actually empty... given how massive it was, and how little of it they saw, there could be hordes of monsters in here, only waiting for them to get tired... Twilight might tell herself that it was unthinkable for any creature to live inside of this place, but she was past the point where guarantees of this nature were fully convincing. The level of magic that was at work here was so far beyond what she was used to that the only true boundaries still remaining were the fundamental laws of magic, or perhaps not even those. After all, everything had begun with her letter to Celestia, observing that their precious laws were repeatedly being broken... At least so far, the tower hadn’t demonstrated that kind of ability. It had shown enormous power, no doubt, but nothing strictly supernatural. She hoped it would stay that way. Twilight felt as though her vision was getting blurry, even though it was near-impossible to tell. With strained eyes, she kept staring ahead, wondering how Rainbow might feel at the moment. How was this experience for her? How afraid was she? Had she ever asked this much of her own body before? How close was she to total exhaustion? There was one part of their preparations which had seemed a bit silly at the time. Even though they had expected the tower’s insides to be relatively small, and even though they had packed plenty of supplies, Twilight had argued that, just in case, they should make sure to eat a decent meal before going in – and, more importantly, to drink a lot. It had seemed so negligible that she’d almost skipped out on it. Almost. But not quite. Now, it seemed as if that decision might save both of their lives. If they had entered the tower in worse conditions, Rainbow would probably have given up already. Once again, Twilight checked for teleportation access. Nothing. “Your trust in the phoenix seems misplaced,” Rarity’s voice said in her head. “One percent is significant when it comes to your survival.” “You are acting irresponsibly, or dare I say, irrationally?” Rarity had said all that. Had she been right? Had Twilight been irresponsible? Irrational? Foolish? Naive? ... obsessed? She had always felt grateful for Rarity’s pushback. Almost as a way to justify her actions to herself: if she decided to go through despite Rarity’s concerns, surely her decisions must be well-reasoned. Another thing that was irrational at best. Twilight knew her judgment was flawed. It had improved those past months, and as it was so often, that had just made her realize how flawed it was to begin with. But so was Rarity’s. It was so hard to know anything. Teleportation access was still blocked. “Need a break,” Rainbow’s voice reached her. Only then did Twilight realize that the pegasus had already slowed down, merely gliding now, using up their remaining speed. This time, the landing was a bit less smooth than before. Twilight took it as a bad sign. “Exhausted,” Rainbow murmured. “And... thirsty. Thank Celestia... we followed your advice, Twilight.” “It won’t be far anymore,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow nodded, sinking down into a heap near the wall. “Should I wake you again?” “Don’t think I’ll sleep. Not tired. Just... exhausted.” “Okay.” Twilight sat down beside her. “You think about,” Rainbow began, but the rest of her sentence was too quiet for Twilight to understand. “Sorry?” “Do you think about... romance stuff a lot?” “Oh. Um, not really.” “It appeared in your dream.” “It does occasionally,” Twilight said truthfully. “Often in a strange way. Like this last one. I think that’s natural.” “Hasn’t appeared in mine for years.” “You’re not normal.” Rainbow made a sound that was somewhere between a cough and a giggle. “Do you like Fluttershy?” “I don’t think so,” Twilight said, who wasn’t sure why Rainbow had started this topic, or whether she should be concerned. “When I heard it worked out between her and Autumn Leaf, I was a bit envious, but I’m... not attracted to her like that.” “I was really happy for her.” “I’m too.” “Then why be jealous?” “Envious,” Twilight corrected. “I can feel two things at once, Rainbow.” “Okay, but why?” “Uhm, I think I always – well, since I came here at least – imagined that there might one day happen something more between me and... another one of us six... but I rarely thought about it... consciously.” “‘Another one of us six’?” Twilight hesitated. “I guess Fluttershy or Rarity.” “Well,” Rainbow said, “Fluttershy’s taken.” “I know.” “And not into mares.” “I know. Rainbow, are you okay?” For a while, Rainbow didn’t respond. “No.” Twilight looked at her. Her mane had lost all of its elegance, hanging down wet from her face. She herself probably didn’t look much better. “I never want to fly again.” Something changed. They had kept together well so far. Rainbow better than her. Had shouldered the impossible, flown them for all those hours. But now... “Now you’re scaring me.” “I’m so... thirsty, Twilight. You’re not supposed to fly so far without-” “We shouldn’t talk, then,” Twilight whispered. Rainbow said nothing. “You’ve made it so far. That had to have been over two hours. Only thirty miles left... or even less than that.” “Twilight,” Rainbow said, “we both know that’s our wishes talking. For all we know, we’ve flown in a circle.” It had probably been like this before, but Twilight only noticed now that the pegasus’ voice sounded raspier than normal. She could only imagine the sheer amount she had sweat so far, and the thirst would only grow stronger from now on. Rainbow was approaching her limit. If they had flown in a circle, if the remaining distance was anything close to what they had already flown, she wouldn’t make it. Twilight knew it. “But you can-” “Doesn’t matter,” Rainbow murmured. “I’ll try, anyway. Just give me some time.” They flew again. After a while, Twilight began to wonder what they’d do if Rainbow didn’t make it. If the end was too far, or not there at all. Even if they eventually died of thirst, that was still a long way off. Several days, presumably. If the others stuck to the plan and waited three days to do something, perhaps they should try to last as long as possible? There were... ways to prolong life in the face of thirst or hunger. Twilight had never done it, but she knew how it worked in theory. If she was successful, three days should be possible for Rainbow. She herself probably wouldn’t even need it. But what then? There was one thought so morbid that Twilight had so far avoided to think it verbally, even though her mind had already formulated it in its own way. The absolute worst outcome would be for her friends to notify the princess, and for the princess to enter the tower, only to be trapped forever. In that case, Twilight would have done more damage to Equestria than anypony before her. Would Celestia risk it? Probably not. It would not be wise. But Twilight wasn’t sure. ... enough. They would make it out, and if not, Peewee would come after them himself. He owed it to her. Steering her thoughts away, Twilight checked for teleportation access. Blocked. Twilight wondered whether Rainbow was blaming her. She remembered the talk they had had after their initial set of experiments. Rainbow had been wanting to come with her from the get-go. Had been curious. Had wanted to know what was inside. And now, they still didn’t know. Not really. They knew it was massive – far larger than they had anticipated – but they didn’t know if anything was in here. Or... why. What purpose the tower had. How it had come to be. One thing was certain: trapping them so they’d never find out wasn’t a valid explanation. There still needed to be a reason, regardless of whether anyone found out. What a bizarre thought to have. Twilight shuddered. Observing herself, it seemed as if she wasn’t expecting them to make it out anymore. But that was irrational. They hadn’t flown past the point Twilight had calculated yet. On the contrary, they ought to be close now, so their odds should be better, not worse. She checked for teleportation access. Blocked. Twilight only realized what had happened a good second after they were being thrust through the air. The impact had been soft, barely noticeable, her spell propelling them backwards, like a pinball. Rainbow screamed in shock, pressing her wings through to regain balance, while Twilight was overcome with exhaustion. Then everything went dark. Twilight opened her eyes. ... they had hit a wall. Where was Rainbow? Had she left? A surge of panic shot through her heart. For a few seconds, she had no idea what to do, until she realized that she could make light. “Twilight!” Rainbow was standing beside her. A wave of relief. Twilight realized she was lying. She stood up. “How long have I been out?” “Just a few minutes. What happened?” “I overestimated how much force our impact would have. And I underestimated how much energy it would cost. I should have... gone for a much lighter shield. Thank Celestia I didn’t overdo it even more.” “I didn’t know it would bounce us off like that. I thought we would just crash and it wouldn’t hurt as much or something.” “I didn’t know, either,” Twilight said truthfully. “I haven’t used this spell in years.” “Oh.” Then, “doesn’t matter now. So can you-” But Twilight interrupted her. “Look.” At the spot where the wall bent, there was a door-shaped hole. “Twilight,” Rainbow hissed, “can you teleport now or not?” Twilight gulped. Their lives might depend on the answer to this question. But after so many times, how were the odds that it was free here? Closing her eyes, expecting the worst, Twilight checked. ... !!! “It’s free! It’s free!” Rainbow let out a long breath. “Alright,” she said, “then let’s get out of here.” Twilight hesitated. “Twilight! We’ve been here for long enough! Let’s get out while we still can!” Twilight had never felt intimidated by Rainbow Dash before. Not really. But now she did. The fact that her voice was more than a little raspy didn’t help. “Rainbow...” she said cautiously. “Twilight, for Celestia’s sake! Don’t tell me you’re thinking about staying longer! Get us out!” “No!” “What?” “Rainbow, first of all, we can teleport now, alright? It won’t just go away.” “How do you know that?” Twilight wanted to respond, but Rainbow didn’t give her a chance. “This is all freaky, right? Totally out of normal bounds. You don’t know crap!” “Actually no, it’s been following laws quite nicely! It’s just really powerful! But didn’t I tell you in advance how large it would be and-” “Twilight,” Rainbow growled, “we can have this conversation outside! Get us out!” For a few seconds, Twilight didn’t respond, a part of her wondering whether Rainbow would start attacking her. “Rainbow Dash,” she said eventually. “You’ve been amazing. Really amazing. Without you, I wouldn’t have had a chance to make it out. You never blamed me. You reacted great to everything. You were always constructive. But right now, you’re being stupid. And we’re not making stupid decisions. Not when I can avoid it. We’re going to do the smart thing, no matter how much we want to get out of here.” “How is it smart to stay here for longer?” “For one, because I can set up an anchor to teleport us here in the future.” “Why would you-” But Rainbow interrupted herself. When she spoke again, Twilight was relieved to hear that her rush of anger seemed to have receded. “Shouldn’t you have done that earlier?” “Maybe... but probably not. It takes a lot of energy.” “And why would you need it now?” “Because, if we ever decide to come back, it would be nice not to have to fly one-hundred-and-sixty miles only to get back out.” Rainbow sighed. “I want to get out, Twilight. But fine. How long do you need?” “A while. I just overexerted myself. I need to recharge.” “How long is ‘a while?’” “Twenty minutes?” Rainbow groaned. “Twilight, you’re killing me. Fine.” “You don’t seem that exhausted.” Twilight had been pacing around. She sighed. “Rainbow, it’s like exhausting one specific muscle. If you make pushups or whatever. You’ll exhaust your front hooves, but the rest is fine.” “It’s not even like that,” Rainbow murmured, but didn’t say anything else. A few more minutes passed, then she stood up. “Don’t you want to go through there at all?” She made a gesture of the hole. “We shouldn’t go too far away,” Twilight said carefully. “I would be okay with leaving it be for now. It’s probably more of the same. I doubt that we-” She interrupted herself as Rainbow walked over, taking a step through the hole. “Woah!” At once, Twilight got up, rushing next to her. Rainbow was still standing inside the entrance, which was too narrow for more than one pony to fit, and she couldn’t see anything from her current position. “What?” Rainbow took a step back. “See for yourself.” More than a little nervous, Twilight took a step through the hole, immediately realizing what Rainbow had seen. It was bright. At least it was bright for them, with their eyes adjusted to near-total darkness. There was no apparent source of light, but she could still see, and the wall... it wasn’t flat like the part they had been in; instead, there were countless bizarre forms, shapes, whatever protruding out and into the wall. It looked totally chaotic, and totally random. And unnatural. Then she saw something else. Black smoke or... or dust, or something, or a swarm of tiny insects, it was moving through the air dozens of yards away, and everything went back to darkness the moment she stepped back in front of the entrance. “I have no idea what this is,” she whispered, realizing how fast her heart was beating. “Was the black floating thing there when you looked?” “What? No.” Rainbow was making a step towards the entrance, but Twilight immediately held her back. “Don’t!” She had been shrieking it, and yet attempting to keep her voice down as far as possible. “... why?” “It’s moving,” Twilight said. “It could... let’s not risk it. Let’s not risk anything. Let’s stay here, until I can cast the anchor, and then get out as you wanted.” “Couldn’t it also come through here?” Twilight bit her lip. Hard. “I can teleport us out quickly. I won’t just leave without doing the anchor. Let’s just get a bit further back.” In the end, they waited for what felt like half an hour. Twilight wanted to make sure not to pass out again. She lit her horn. She cast the anchor. She could feel it sucking energy out of her, but she was strong enough. Then she focused on the anchor in the library, on the route that was now finally free. They disappeared. “Twilight! Rainbow! Y’all look terrible!” Author's Note This is now this story’s theme song:
Chapter 26Author's Note Wow. It’s been a year. And I’m still alive! Yet. Um. My hovercraft is full of eels. Much has happened. Likely to the disadvantage of this story’s reputation. Will it be concluded now? Who knows. The goal is in reach... Chapter 26 Twilight looked at Rainbow. Rainbow looked at Twilight. “You do look terrible,” Rainbow said. “You too.” For a few seconds, nopony said a word, until Rainbow started laughing. Though the situation was hardly funny, Twilight felt an urge to join. She resisted. After a while, Rainbow’s laughing turned into a cough, and without much ado, she dropped herself downward, lying squarely on the library floor. “I thought we were toast, Twilight. I didn’t think we’d make it out of there.” “Why, what happened?” Applejack asked, visibly disturbed. “The place was massive,” Twilight replied. Suddenly, she realized that she had tears in her eyes. “Um... a hundred and sixty miles wide and over a thousand miles tall, if what I calculated is... accurate. Without Rainbow, I’d have never made it out.” “Woah! Did she-” “-fly us all the way?” Rainbow finished her sentence. “You bet.” Twilight swallowed, trying to calm herself. “It was pitch-black the entire time,” she said, and in doing so first realized that it was also dark now. “What time is it?” “Ought to be ‘round one AM by now. Pinkie was waitin’ here ‘till midnight, then I took over.” “One AM... do you think we should just let them sleep, and report in tomo-” “Ponyfeathers, Twilight! No-one’s sleeping! Y’all had us worried sick!” “Okay, okay. But... I really don’t want to go out, and I bet Rainbow doesn’t, either.” “I think they’re all at Pinkie’s place. I can get ‘em.” “Alright.” Twilight let out a long breath. The beating of her heart was loud in her ears. “We’re alive... we’re back...” Applejack gave her a worried glance. “Well... I’ll go get ‘em. See y’all in just a bit.” With a tip of her head, she excused herself. “I wanna take a shower,” Twilight said a while after she was gone. “Rainbow, what about you?” Rainbow raised her head. “You mean together?” “Don’t see why not. They won’t need long.” “So, you were right, Rarity,” Twilight concluded. Just as Applejack had said, the others had all been at Sugarcube Corner, and none of them had been sleeping. It had taken barely ten minutes for all of them to arrive at the library once Applejack had left. “Without Rainbow... I’d have died of exhaustion. Or thirst. We shouldn’t... we shouldn’t have gone in.” “Oh darling!” Rarity rushed forward, drawing Twilight in an unexpected embrace. “I was the one who encouraged everypony not to come! If Rainbow had listened to me, you’d be dead now! Because of me!” “Rarity...” Twilight mouthed, weakly returning the gesture. “That’s such a bad way to see this. If I hadn’t tried to get in in the first place...” “But... but we should have all come with you. Like we usually do.” “Uhm.” Rarity let go of Twilight so both of them could turn towards Fluttershy. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. It sounds like the only reason they made it out is because Rainbow was strong enough to fly them... that far. If we all had come, then... uhm, Rainbow couldn’t have carried all of us, so...” While she spoke, Twilight was reminded of her talk with Rainbow, as she had been at the peak of her exhaustion. Then she realized she had just been hugging Rarity a moment ago. “Fluttershy’s right,” she now said. “And that’s what bothers me. We’ve been lucky. Really, really lucky. And the phoenix wasn’t supposed to put us in a situation where we need luck to make it out.” “Was he really s’pposed to do anythin’?” “I guess not, I just... I thought we’d be... safe.” As Twilight said this, she realized just how true it was. “I trusted him. I trusted Peewee not to put us in real danger. But I was wrong. Clearly.” “Yeah,” Rainbow said after a while, “yeah, you really were. But it’s cool, y’know.” She gave Twilight a friendly poke. “We’ve been lucky before. It always worked out in the end.” “Right,” Twilight murmured. “... so far.” Upon this, no-pony else said a word, until the silence began to feel uncomfortable. “So...” Pinkie Pie eventually asked, “what now?” What now? For the first two weeks after the incident, Twilight had felt no desire to go back. She had made no progress in understanding Peewee, and no preparations for another visit, but neither had she messaged the princess. She had simply put it on hold. Fluttershy was still taking sessions, and they were still very short. Then her brother had gotten married. After two days of dealing with a Cadence that was so very unlike her old foalsitter, Twilight had confronted the other girls about it. None of them had shared her suspicions, but none of them had known how Cadence used to be like. Fluttershy had been the first to suggest that they should cover their grounds regardless, and Rarity the first to agree. Collectively, they had paid Shining and his wife-to-be a visit at the end of that day, planing to stay as long as necessary to talk things out. As a progressively more devastated Twilight had brought up their shared past and memories out of sheer frustration, things had taken a turn which none of them had expected. Twilight had held her own for the better part of ten seconds in an open fight with Queen Chrysalis, and Luna, who had come to their aid almost immediately, for about twice as long. Twilight wasn’t sure how things would have turned out if not for what had come next. Would Celestia, who had only taken another minute to show up, have been able to beat Chrysalis, who, as Luna had later said, must have run on the combined power of dozens of subjects? If not, would Chrysalis have seized control over Canterlot? Would she have attempted to... rule? Imprisoned everypony who would oppose her? Or would she have murdered Celestia and Luna? They would never find out. But whatever had been at stake that day, someone or something had decided it was enough to interfere. Twilight had not even seen it happening; she and Luna had been held down and fully blinded by the changeling queen. But the others had told her. Told her that there had been no fight, no sign of warning, not even a real confrontation. Philomena had simply flown in on Chrysalis, there had been a flash, and Chrysalis lifeless body had hit the ground.
Chapter 1Dear Princess Celestia, I’ve been struggling to find the right words for this letter. Maybe it’s because I’ve never really written you for a reason like this. I’m really nervous. But I’ve already dismissed several tries. I’ll just have to go with this one now, no matter how it turns out. It seems to me that, among the few of us who look far enough into the depths of magic, it is an open secret that what is being taught isn’t quite accurate. It’s close, certainly, but it’s not really true. Salon’s law that models all spells as interactions with the magical plane seems to apply for all but one known species. You know what I am talking about, I’m sure. Phoenixes. They come back from the dead, princess. Surely, we cannot look at this without questioning our understanding of the universe, and of magic foremost. We teach everyone that death is a point of no return, and yet they do return. The only way I see for this to fall in line with what is taught is if the newborn is actually a different creature, and the death of its parent sparks a new life. I don’t have to tell you how unlikely and unintuitive this seems, and it does not even explain their other anomalies. I don’t know if you have reasons for never teaching me about them. I don’t know if there is some kind of unspoken law or pact that prohibits us from researching them. That’s why I’m writing to you, to get clarification on this, so that I know whether I am allowed to take a closer look. Because after what happened, that is what I want to do. Yesterday, as I’m sure you know, the great dragon migration has taken place. After their flight across Ponyville, they have taken temporary residence amidst the Badlands. For the other girls and myself, this was mostly a spectacle, but for Spike, it was his first confrontation with his own kind, and afterwards he was determined to seek them out to satisfy his curiosity. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and I have followed him, and eventually, just as we expected, he was taken aback by their hostile nature, and decided to come home with us. (I didn’t think the risk was that high, as I set up an anchor before departing, and was ready to teleport us back if needed (and did do so, in the end)). However, there are two incidents which happened during the trip that I wanted to tell you about. One is that your latest letter had the unfortunate timing of arriving while Spike was in the company of a group of teenage dragons (I’m sorry, but it was you who encouraged me to deal with similar things based on my own judgment, and I did not see this coming). A bigger dragon took it from him, read a few words, and then threw it away into a pool of lava. I don’t think he has gathered any sensible information from it (if present), but I was unable to read it myself. More importantly, though, is the second point. Apparently, a few dragons had decided to raid a phoenix nest, and they sent Spike to lure the parents away. He did so, and in their absence, the group found the eggs to have already hatched. They were unable to harm the younglings before their parents returned, and thankfully they dealt with the dragons in a peaceful way, even abandoning their nest afterward. However, there seems to have been one egg left, and Spike was the first one to come back and find it. As you can guess, the others immediately told told him to smash it. I shudder to imagine what might have happened if he had done so, but instead he decided to refuse, which was when we evacuated him. Teleporting us all back to Ponyville was harder than it should have been. It was as if we were two ponies more than we actually were, and the egg is the only cause for this that I can think of. Nonetheless, I did manage to do it, on the second try, and we brought the egg to the library. On the same evening, it hatched. Now, there is a phoenix youngling, just a few yards away from me. You can see why I am concerned. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle
Chapter 2Dear Twilight, the letter I sent was of negligible importance. It was actually directed at Spike, and was written partly in jest. I foresaw the migration having an effect on him, and tried to nudge you all into talking it through. I did not foresee him running off on a whim, but there is no cause to apologize for what you did. I did encourage you to take decisions into your own hooves, and I am proud that you did. To address the main issue: you are not wrong. Phoenixes are indeed a flaw in our conception of the universe. I shall not reveal to you the reasons for why I didn’t tell you about them, though you can be assured that it was intended on my part. You have been asking for my advice, so here is some. Do not hurt the phoenix. Do not neglect the phoenix. Do not stop the phoenix if she tries to fly away. Do not keep her in a cage. Tell the same to Spike as well as anyone else who watches over her. I know that this is not what you were hoping for, but it is all I will give. Beyond that, I will not tell you what to do. You can attempt to bring the phoenix back to her parents, or you can keep her by your side, as long as she wishes to stay with you. What matters is that you do not force her into doing either. Some of what I know might be of help to you in deciding whether you want to research them further; however, let me emphsize again that I am not giving advice. There is no pact or law that can stop you, but there is reason for caution. We do not know the scope of the phoenixes’ abilities, nor their intelligence or intentions. We do not know how they do magic, and we do not know how they come back from the dead, or why their number isn’t steadily increasing if they are in fact immortal. Everything you decide to do, you will do based on your own judgment. And to answer the question which I’m sure you have: it is no coincidence that I keep a phoenix by my side. But Philomena is not a pet. Were she to leave, I would not dream of stopping her. Oh, there was also a recommendation for Rarity in the lost letter. Tell her to try out “Forgotten Secrets” by Firequill. It is the best romance novel that I have read in the last 100 years, and I suspect she will find it much to her liking. Looking forward to your response, Princess Celestia Twilight’s eyes flickered back upwards as she reached the end of the letter. The part about Peewee had been highlighted, the ink radiating in a blazing red. The princess must have used a spell for that specifically, which was not something Twilight had ever seen done before. Do not keep her in a cage. Well, it was a ‘him’, but they hadn’t been doing that. Do not hurt the phoenix. That much was obvious. Tell that to Spike aswell as anyone else... good, she would do that. Do not stop the phoenix if she tries to fly away. Or in other words, Peewee wasn’t a pet, he was a guest. Do not neglect the phoenix. Only, what did that include? She should ask for a clarification. It was clear that the warning extended beyond Peewee, though, and that she was to take it just as seriously. Dangerous... A shiver ran over her neck as the pieces slowly fell into place, the decision lying before her.
Chapter 5Twilight Sparkle, It is because I have been informed of your intentions by my beloved sister that I feel the necessity to share with you the following: I have once had an interaction with a phoenix, and whatever has taken place that day has led to the erasure of all of my memories of the incident, leaving me knowing nothing beyond what I have just written. Alas, there are a great many secrets that could be unveiled by somepony brave and powerful enough to step onto this route. I do not seek to discourage you, merely to advise caution, particularly if you are to come close to that which shapes the very nature of this mysterious species. Respectfully, Princess Luna. Ruler of the Night and the Realm of Dreams PS: I do hope I did not fail on the technicalities of a casual letter.
Chapter 6Over the following days, Twilight bore witness to the inevitable effect of the hard-felt issue gradually sliding into the background. The universe did not adjust to her conviction; opportunities did not come knocking at her door, and her life proceeded largely unchanged, with the phoenix issue simply being the nature of her current project. Now, with both royal sisters having inculcated on her the need to be careful, the most sensible course of action was none other than to conduct her research in the most careful way that anypony could conduct research. By reading books. The issue with this plan was of course that there weren’t any books written on phoenixes specifically, but she wouldn’t be Twilight if she let that stop her. Phoenixes were still mentioned in other literature, and so she made it her task to read, or in some cases re-read, the bulk of the history section in the library. For others, this might have seemed like a rather time-expensive and potentially excessive measure, but Twilight knew better. Reading on interesting material was already one of her favorite things to do, so all her current motivation had to do was to add a small additional benefit in order to make it worthwhile. In fact, the somewhat troubling truth was that even the mere illusion of a greater purpose was enough to do so. Even if an excuse to read turned out to be futile in hindsight, she was usually enjoying herself so much in the process that she couldn’t be bothered by it afterwards. Only if she didn’t have a goal at all, then even reading could become boring. This degree of self-awareness might end up being helpful, because so far, her success had been slim at best. A History of Equestria part 2 mentioned a tribe of pegasi joining with a large group of phoenixes as they fled from a region threatened by the legendary war between dragons and griffons, but it didn’t go into any useful details. Part 4 had two instances of an important figure keeping a phoenix as an alleged pet, and part 5 a third. What is driving other species: Griffons, Mules, Dragons, and Sea Serpents, which was an enormous book about the history of those creatures whom the author considered the most intelligent – besides ponies – mentioned phoenixes a couple of times, primarily in how dragons seemed to consider them natural enemies. There was no instance of phoenixes ever fighting back, but the reason the book proposed was simply their lack of intelligence... ... animals just weren’t smart enough to coordinate a counter strike. (The book also touched on the sad nature of dragon culture, with which Twilight wholeheartedly agreed. Despite being at the top of the game as far as intelligence went – close to if not on par with ponies – their recklessness, hostility, and greed made it so that they had never developed any kind of stable society, and behaved more like animals than ponies. Griffons, mules, and particularly sea serpents were all less intelligent and yet more civil.) However, for all the one-sided aggression, there didn’t really seem to be a lot of damage done on the side of the phoenixes, which was probably the single most interesting fact that she had yet discovered. Maybe the incident with Spike had been less close than she had assumed. Or, maybe it had only been dangerous because they had threatened younglings. If Peewee was any indication, then phoenixes grew up very fast. It had only been eight days, this one included, and he was already closer to being full-grown than newborn. Griffons, from what Twilight had gathered, would put phoenixes on the same level as rats or any other animal, but did not actively seek to harm them. Lastly, sea serpents were known for being friendly and pacifist, and there was not a single encounter mentioned in the book. What was of course covered at length was the great war, which had ended with the mysterious death of the great dragon king. However, while ponies had been trying to help negotiating peace since before war even broke out, while sea serpents had tried the same with little success, and while mules had been deliberately absent, there was no mention of phoenixes knowing, or even caring about it. Naturally, because they weren’t intelligent enough. They were just animals. The author hadn’t included them in the title, because they were not considered anything else but a rare kind of animal with an unusually high amount of magical ability. And Twilight might have believed that, were it not for Philomena. It was just anecdotal evidence, but it was real and unfiltered, and she had experienced it first-hoof. Not only had the phoenix actively chosen to stay with Fluttershy, she had actually used her as the object of a joke. A phoenix had performed a joke, through a cognitive action. That was not something animals were capable of. Joking was something sea serpents were hardly capable off, and they were considered the fifth most intelligent species in the world. Anecdotal evidence or not, even a single data point was enough to disprove the theory of phoenixes as mere animals. Such could not be explained away as an anomaly. Plus, erasing a specific part of Luna’s memory was likewise pretty strong evidence for some kind of logical reasoning. Which did then beg the question of why the world still considered them animals. And if that was due to a choice on their part, then Celestia only knew how intelligent they truly were. Or, rather, even Celestia didn’t seem to know.
Chapter 12Dear Princess Celestia, I’m writing you because I want to ask if you can tell me more of what you know. I’ve been to my friends for help, and one of them has nudged me into this direction. I must admit now that she has a point. You have been making it clear that you want us to move past the stage where I do things because I have been instructed to. This is the real world, and the issue I’m trying to solve is not part of a task, but it is to add to the knowledge of ponydom. It is for science. And if it is not a game, and if it is about the result, and not the process, then why hide information from me? My heart is beating pretty fast right now. I’m not used to writing to you in this tone. Please let me add that, if you have good reasons, then I’m sorry for pressuring you unfairly, and if you think it is wise not to share those reasons with me, then I understand completely. All I want is for you to confirm that those reasons really exist. (I’ve given Rarity your recommendation, and she has read it in two days. She said it is possibly her new favorite book, or if not then almost, and she asked me to give you her thanks). Your ever faithful student Twilight
Chapter 21“You don’t want me to send it?” Twilight might have convinced herself that phoenixes were pure good, but that didn’t stop her from being afraid now. She had done tests with the phoenix, after concluding that he wasn’t intelligent, some even before that, and without asking for his consent – naturally, because he hadn’t been able to give it! Yes Philomena had once made a joke, but fact was that Peewee simply hadn’t shown to understand what was going on! How could she have known? How could he suddenly be sentient? He shook his head. “You can understand me now?” she asked in a whisper. He nodded. “Have you always been able to...” He shook his head. Somewhere inside, Twilight felt relief. This would appear to explain it, as bizarre was it was in its own right. “How?” He shook his head once more, and his left wing twitched in a way which was unmistakably signaling that- “He doesn’t want you to ask.” Twilight’s gaze met Fluttershy’s. “Is he talking to you?” “No, I just wasn’t sure if you- ... I have a lot of experience reading body language.” Twilight nodded. “That makes sense. Keep paying attention.” She turned back to the phoenix. “You don’t want...” She stopped herself, shaking her head. “Do you want me to contact the princess?” she rephrased her question. He shook his head. “Do you want me to tell the other elements?” He... ... nodded. Beside her, Fluttershy gave a small gasp. “Do you know about the tower?” He nodded. “Can we tell anypony else?” Fluttershy chimed in. “Beside the elements.” He shook his head. “Do you want us to... investigate the tower?” Peewee nodded. Suddenly, Twilight had bad feeling, a suspicion, which, if true... She tried asking the question, but her voice was so quiet that she had to try again. “Do you want us to destroy it?” The moment her mouth stopped moving, his eyes stared directly into hers. Twilight wasn’t sure, but she thought his head was moving, giving the faintest idea of a nod, before he tilted it to the side, giving a cry which sounded unlike anything Twilight had heard from him before. “Not yet?” Fluttershy asked, “just investigate for now?” He blinked. Then he nodded. Author's Note I wanted to release the next three chapters today, but I'm not finished working over the third (which has normal length again). Takes a stupidly long time. But it's progressing.
Chapter 23“You can,” Rainbow Dash said. “I know a buddy from Cloudsdale who changed her name when she got a big job in global weather control.” “Global?” Rarity asked. “Yeah. There aren’t just local teams like mine, there’s also a group which controls the weather in all of Equestria. That’s why we have to plan out everything at least two weeks in advance, so we can run it by them first.” “I didn’t know that,” Twilight chimed in. “They can’t possibly-” “Looks like books don’t know everything after all!” Rainbow interrupted her, sticking out her tongue in mid walk. Pinkie Pie giggled. “Rainbow Dash... you know that I haven’t actually read every book there is, right?” “Meh.” “So how can they manage every single weather team? That sounds like a lot to organize.” Rainbow shrugged. “We usually get broad instructions, like ‘four to six rainfalls’ and then we can do the rest as we want. We have to run it back by them, but they never complain. Who knows if they even read it.” “And how do you-” “Should we go in here?” Fluttershy interrupted her, causing everyone to halt. Twilight turned her head. They were indeed standing beside what looked like a restaurant, albeit a very small one, with just two tables situated outside the place. One of them was empty, and on the other, Thunderlane was sitting with some pegasus mare she didn’t recognize. “‘The Lunar Commander’,” Applejack read aloud from the sign hanging on top of the entrance. “Can’t say I’ve been here before.” “I have,” Rarity said. “They have great mushrooms.” “And we have a nice view,” Fluttershy added, pointing towards Town Hall, were a group of foals could be seen playing tag. “But do we even fit around that?” Twilight gave the empty table a skeptical glance. There was a cushioned bench on the side of the restaurant’s wall, along with three comfortable-looking chairs positioned around it, but it seemed like it was intended for five ponies at most. “We’ll just have to sit tight!” Pinkie exclaimed, giggling, whether at her wordplay or at random Twilight wasn’t sure. With a few bounces she made for the bench, dropping down. “Who wants to sit next to me?” “I do,” Fluttershy said immediately. “I really like watching foals play,” she added with a smile after taking her seat. This apparently settled it, and as everyone took their seat, Twilight ended up at the third spot on the couch on Pinkie’s other side. There was now indeed very little space left between them. “Only four menus,” Rarity observed, picking up the items in question. “We’ll just need one.” Twilight took one of the articles in her magic, levitating it so that she and both ponies next to her could take a look. “Rarity, what was that mushroom dish you liked?” “One moment... ah, here it is. Item fourteen.” Twilight flipped a page, giving it a brief look. “I’ll take that one.” “Me too,” Fluttershy agreed, but Pinkie Pie made a face. “I don’t like mushrooms. Can you go to the desserts?” “You ain’t really gonna order just cake, are you, Pinkie?” “Hehe... I like to see how other ponies bake things!” “Just a professional interest?” Fluttershy asked, causing a series of laughs from the group. A bit more chatter followed, though Twilight soon stopped paying attention, her mind wandering back to the tower. It was such an incredible thing. A structure evading even the princess’ gaze. That was, unless Celestia did know about it and just didn’t want to tell her. But that was unlikely... she seemed to have been quite open with her, even sharing some of her own fears. She barely noticed the waiter approaching, a good-looking unicorn with a blue coat and a short, silver mane. “Have the ladies chosen yet?” “Yes,” Rarity said, “we’d like the champion plate three times, please, both the strawberry and the apple pie – not for dessert, but along the main course – the hay fries once, and I will take the big mixed salad, item three. As for drinks...” “I’ll take the cider,” Rainbow Dash said. “Still water for me,” Twilight murmured absently. “I want the chocolate milk!” “The apple juice for me.” “Uhm. Also a glass of apple juice for me, please.” “And I will have the blackcurrant juice, if you will,” Rarity concluded. “Honestly, Rainbow,” she added once the waiter had disappeared, “do you have any ability or interest to distinguish good and bad food?” “I know I can distinguish good from bad hay fries! You think it tastes the same when you eat it at home?” “She’s hopeless,” Applejack whispered to the fashion designer, though loud enough for everypony to understand. If they really entered... what would they find? What would they find? There was something in there. Something was inside that tower. Sooner or later, she’d find out what it was. While she was still musing the tower, a thought from earlier came bubbling up from the depths of her mind. She distinctly remembered thinking “I now work for him,” as Pewee had overseen her first set of experiments. But did she really? Peewee had never taken the initiative. He hadn’t found her; she’d found him. Had confronted him. Had connected to him. And yet, was now doing what it seemed like he wanted... The problem was this: if examining the tower was what the phoenix really wanted, then why hadn’t he done more to get her here? Sure, it had worked out for him – at least so far – but only because her curiosity had done the entire work. If he had just talked to her earlier, he could have made sure... This, then, brought her back to the question of his intelligence. Her research had found that phoenixes were generally considered animals, but the single fact that she had witnessed Philomena doing a joke had led her not to believe it. Now she had confirmation. What Peewee had done was – She snapped out of her thoughts as she heard Rarity say her name. “–to make you actually go in there.” “Sorry, can you say that again?” Twilight asked. Pinkie snickered. “Told you she was totally spaced out!” “Rainbow said she’d like to see what’s in the tower,” Rarity explained, “and I pointed out that you’ll probably try to make her go in there. Won’t you?” “Oh. Uh, didn’t we just have this discussion earlier? I do want us to go in there, but I won’t force anyone, like I said.” “Yes...” Rarity sounded reluctant. “... yes, we did. But you know, darling, you...” She stopped. “Yes?” Twilight asked as the silence began to stretch on. “I have nothing new to say, I suppose,” Rarity murmured. “Girls, what do you think? This isn’t just a matter between Twilight and me. If Twilight does find an entrance, will you try to get inside?” “I can’t even see it,” Rainbow was first to respond. “If I did go in there, wouldn’t it just, well... like, still be nothing?” “I can’t say for sure...” Twilight let her gaze bounce between Rarity and Rainbow. “... because the tower might be doing things in an... err, in a different way, but if a unicorn cast this spell, then it almost certainly wouldn’t work anymore once you’re actually inside. So-” “You mean I’d see everything once I’m in?” Twilight nodded. “Probably.” “Sweet...” Rainbow licked her lips. “Rarity, aren’t you also curious?” “Well, I suppose I am, but not enough.” “Come on! We’ve beaten Nightmare Moon and Discord and you’ve made it out of a dirt hole full of giant dogs all by yourself! What are you so afraid of?” “It seems there won’t be any need for Twilight to convince you after all.” But Rainbow kept watching the fashionista with a raised eyebrow, who clearly hadn’t actually answered the question. “There’s some reason to be afraid,” Twilight came to her help. “Like I said, this invisibility stuff is really impressive. If the tower wanted to hurt everyone going inside, well, it probably could.” “But you don’t think that will happen,” Fluttershy asked, “because...?” “I trust Peewee. So far that has worked.” “And that’s what I take issue with!” Rarity insisted. “Your trust in this... in Peewee seems misplaced, or dare I say: irrational.” “Mh,” Twilight just made, trying to consider the possibility that Rarity was actually right. It was indicative that she couldn’t quite articulate why she was so sure of her position. “Ain’t we just treadin’ old water, now?” “Perhaps so. But I am worried that Twilight will lead you to do something dangerous, so the least she should do is explain everypony what for.” “I can’t tell you what for,” Twilight said slowly. “I don’t know what inspecting the tower will do anymore than you. Or what’s inside. I can try to explain why I trust Peewee as much as I do.” Rarity nodded. “Please.” “Well – he’s a phoenix, for one. I know there are some exceptions, but on the whole, creatures which look friendly to us also tend to be friendly. Take ponies, sea serpents, uhm... mules... and compare that to dragons, griffons, manticores, timber wolves...” “Diamond dogs!” Rainbow chimed in. “Very few dangerous animals look friendly,” Fluttershy confirmed. “The only real exception are nymphs. Though there are a few species which look scary but are still friendly, like... I’d say manticores, actually. And zebras, and-” “Zebras don’t look scary!” Pinkie Pie protested. “What?” Rainbow gave her a disbelieving look. “Weren’t you the one who wrote that song about Zecora when we first met her? About her being an evil, err...” “Enchantress,” Rarity said. “Right.” “Right,” Twilight echoed. “But that’s not the only reason. We know that they aren’t animals, now. Peewee has talked to me and there’s still the thing with Philomena pulling a prank on Fluttershy. And... and I think they killed the dragon king.” “What?” Rainbow asked, while at the same time, Fluttershy took a sharp breath. “A-are you serious, Twilight?” “Hold on,” Applejack interrupted her. “Somepony’s gotta explain what yer talkin’ about.” “Two-hundred years ago,” Rarity began before Twilight could, “there was a war between griffons and dragons. They say it started when a young dragon took her resting place too close to a griffon village. The griffons wanted her gone, and when she refused, they sent a small group to push her out by force. In the resulting confrontation, two of the griffons were killed. Burnt alive. The remaining ones reacted by mobilizing half the village, and the dragon was murdered on the same day.” “This is well-documented,” Twilight chimed in. “Not just some tale ponies made up or exaggerated. As far as I know, it all happened like that, except that only one of the griffons was burnt, the other took a claw to the chest and died on the retreat. Err... anyway. Go on?” Rarity nodded. “The dragons did not react well. They are an immensely proud race, the murder of one of their own, even after what she had done, was not something they were willing to take without consequence. The dragon king declared that everyone who took part in the incident – and that meant several dozen griffons – was to be executed, only then would there be peace. Naturally, the griffons refused. What resulted are the most bloody months in Equestrian history thus far.” “Griffons outnumbered them fifty to one,” Twilight added quietly, “but a fully grown dragon is far stronger than any griffon. They were matched almost evenly, which just made things worse.” “But why didn’t Celestia put an end to it?” Applejack asked. “If it was between any other two species, she probably would have,” Twilight responded, her voice now barely more than a whisper. “But dragons are strong. Remember how Spike always says it’s hard for me to do magic tricks on him because he’s a dragon? He’s right. Dragons have a natural resistance to unicorn magic, and that only grows as they grow. I don’t doubt that Celestia could deal with a single dragon, but she can’t force her will on all of them. She tried her best to negotiate peace, though.” “Without success,” Rarity added. “And then the dragon king died,” said Fluttershy. “Precisely,” said Rarity. “But wait,” Rainbow protested, “why did that end the war? Wouldn’t that-” “Ahem,” Applejack made, giving a nod to the approaching waiter. “Blackcurrant juice for you, Miss Rarity. Water for you, Miss. Twilight...” He gave three more drinks out without commenting. “... and the second apple juice for you, Miss Applejack.” Everypony murmured their ‘thank you’s, and as soon as he was out of ear range, Rainbow continued. “So I don’t get it. Wouldn’t murdering the dragon king just make the remaining dragons more angry, and make things worse? He was murdered, right?” “He was,” Rarity said, quickly cutting herself off to leave space to Fluttershy, who had started responding at the same time. “Dragons have a very unique sense of pride and moral,” she explained. ”You might think they’d want revenge, but actually they considered the war to be lost and settled as their king died. He was the one who had declared it in the first place.” “Murdering one dragon was what started the war, but murdering another put an end to it?” Applejack asked disbelievingly. “Yep,” Twilight confirmed. “And it was just about the only thing that would have done the trick. Peace negotiations hadn’t been working at all, because whenever there was a tiny bit of progress, it got squandered once the next fight broke out. And there were fights all the time.” There was a pause, during which Rarity took a sip of her drink, then asked: “You think phoenixes did it. Why?” “It fits the evidence. There is no plausible explanation of how else he died. He was found dead right in the great cave of Svyrrdan, apparently after lying with his mate. It’s close to impossible for griffons to have snuck in there unnoticed, and how would you even do it? It’s extremely difficult to poison a dragon. You’d need a zebraharian shaman, about as good as Zecora, who’s willing to brew a deadly potion, and then you’d have to get it past at least a dozen dragons, and even that shouldn’t have worked so smoothly. I can’t imagine any potion...” But, throwing another look at Pinkie Pie, she stopped herself. It was unnecessary to go into more detail. “Perhaps Celestia did it?” Rarity suggested. “Somehow?” “She once told me she didn’t know what happened.” “Maybe she lied. Doesn’t sound like something you’d tell your student.” It was Rainbow who had said that, and it was probably the second best explanation. Phoenixes aside, Celestia might have been the only player on the board who was capable of murdering such a powerful foe in such a clean way. And while any sentence with both ’murder’ and ’Celestia’ in it sounded absurd, the circumstances had been truly extraordinary. Her gut said no, but she couldn’t be sure. “Could be,” she admitted. “But it could also have been phoenixes. They erased Luna’s memory. If they can do that, they can probably also murder a five-thousand year old dragon without anyone knowing how. At least it’s more likely than that griffons did it, or any other species.” “Okay,” Fluttershy now said, “but why does that make you trust Peewee more?” “It probably did save dozens of lives,” Rainbow Dash pointed out. “Thousands,” Fluttershy corrected her. “Uhm, but still. I don’t see how...” “That war was the worst thing,” Twilight said, “that ever happened in Equestria. Ever. Over a quarter of all dragons and almost a third of all griffons lost their lives. And that one death ended it all. Come on, girls! If they did it, I’m convinced it was the right thing.” She threw an expectant look around, but no nopony, not even Applejack, took the chance to disagree with her. “We might not be sitting here if it hadn’t ended that day,” Fluttershy whispered. “I, um, I don’t mean we wouldn’t be alive, but if those two species had driven each other to extinction, Equestria wouldn’t look the same way it does now. But still, I don’t see why-” “Is it so crazy of me to think they’re watching over us? Given everything?” “Us?” Pinkie Pie asked. “Ponies. Griffons. Even dragons. Maybe every sentient species. Maybe every living creature. Our history... of Equestria... it’s extraordinarily peaceful. We know so little about lands outside, but... they aren’t like that.” Nopony spoke after that. Twilight could feel it too: the unrest that always came with thinking about the land outside of Equestria. Regions that few ponies had ever laid eyes on... and that neither included her nor any of the others... at least not as far as she knew. “I think I understand you better now,” Rarity said eventually. “But darling, all of this is speculation.” Applejack and Fluttershy murmured in agreement. “Yeah,” Twilight admitted, “I know.” “Anyway,” Rainbow said after a short pause, “I’m going in there.” “The tower?” Pinkie asked. “Yeah. I wanna know what’s in there.” And that settled it. Rarity didn’t say anything, and soon the conversation shifted to the elements of harmony, and from there to Applebloom and Sweetie Belle’s struggle with Diamond Tiara. Then their food came, and they began a discussion about restaurants and Rarity’s new fashion line and eventually about Thunderlane. But everyone knew that at least Rainbow Dash and her would soon try to get inside the tower. And Twilight still hadn’t notified Celestia. Author's Note The planning fallacy is the fallacy to think humans can plan. This is wrong.
Chapter 28“... if we had some way of extending a pony’s endurance, that might be extremely valuable for us. Something that would allow somepony to go on, beyond her normal limits. If you could do that, I promise that we would only use it in case of an emergency.” Twilight took a breath, deciding to leave it at that. “Can you help us with that, Zecora?” Perhaps she was imagining it, but the zebra’s eyes seemed narrower than normal. Twilight also noticed that she threw a look at one of her shelves before she responded. “What you ask truly puts my skills to the test – it’s been long since I’ve heard such a request. I do have to ask, before I say more, just what do you need such a potion for?” “I can’t tell you. I’m sorry. But I can promise that it’s not to hurt anyone. Um...” She gave herself a push. “A few weeks ago, Rainbow Dash nearly died from exhaustion. We’re hoping to avoid it, but we might run into a similar situation... again. In that case, having such a potion might save her life. That’s the only way we would use it. ... Do you trust me, Zecora?” “... I got her to agree, but she said she needs some ingredients which she doesn’t have in stock. Do you think you can get those...?” With a slight frown, Rarity took the paper Twilight offered into her telekinesis. Her frown deepened as her eyes went down the list, which only consisted of four items. “Digestive juice of a hydra,” she read. “...” She gave Twilight a blank stare. “Zecora said that’s the key ingredient. It’s definitely necessary.” Rarity shook her head, looking back at the list. “I could get the other ones, I suppose, but whether any store even has this-” “It’s not unheard of in potion making. It should exist somewhere in Canterlot.” Rarity nodded slowly. “Very well then, I will see what I can do.” “If you can’t get that one,” Twilight added, “don’t bother with the rest.” “I see. Ahem – if I may – why are you asking me of all ponies?” “I thought you’d be the best mare for the job,” Twilight simply said, which was the truth. “But if you don’t want to do it-” “I said no such thing. I will help you, I’m just wondering – I suppose I see why you aren’t asking the princess directly, but what about your brother?” “Mh...” Twilight made. “Um. ... Well, I could ask Shining, but, he... I think he’d find the request... weird. He’s good in dealing with royalty and stuff – you know, with that kind of culture – but the alchemy scene is a lot more shady, from what I know. ... plus, he did kinda just have his wife replaced by an evil changeling queen without noticing.” “I... see.” Rarity gave a light cough and a smirk. “Alright then, darling, say no more – I shall do my best to get your digestive juice. ... that is, do say more, because I think there is still an unanswered prerequisite for me acquiring this item.” “I have money.” With a click, the saddle bag she had brought opened up, revealing an inconspicuous-looking bag. “This is probably way more than you’ll need, so I’ll trust you to be economical.” “May I?” Twilight nodded, and Rarity untied the rope, but not without throwing a look around first, as if she were afraid that somepony was peeking through a window. Twilight had, of course, chosen a time where the boutique was not opened to customers. Her eyes widened as she revealed the bag’s contents. Hastily, she tied it back up, but kept it hovering beside her for a few additional moments, during which her gaze slowly trailed the room. “Could you give me a moment, dear, so I can put this into an adequate place? Ahm, if I say ‘adequate’, I mean ‘one Sweetie Belle won’t be looking at’.” Twilight nodded, and Rarity disappeared, taking the bag with her. “Not to be intrusive,” she said as she returned, “but where do you have this many bits from?” “Celestia has given me more than I need, every month, for twelve years. I just put it aside.” Rarity didn’t ask how much, even though Twilight wouldn’t have minded sharing the number. It wasn’t that high; the reason why her savings had grown to this amount was just what she had said: twelve years was a long time. “You can spend some of it, by the way,” she added. “I don’t mind if you book a nice hotel for your stay. Just be reasonable.” Rarity gave an earnest nod. “I will. You have my word.” Then she took a deep breath. “Your decision is made?” Twilight nodded. “I have to do what they want. I have to. After Canterlot, I...” “‘They’? Who are ‘they’?” “They. The... phoenixes. The... thing.” “The thing?” Rarity echoed. “What thing?” “I... I... look. Look. You know how they do what we want? You focus on something, and they do it for you? As long as you don’t verbalize it?” “Yes. That was the result of the experiments you did. You told us about them.” “Right. Well, that doesn’t fit with killing Chrysalis, does it? Or the dragon king?” “Which is still just a theory.” “Yes, but I would bet all the money I just gave you that it happened. I’ve gone over the history books. The dragon king wasn’t just big and powerful, he was actually smart. And he had built a fortress – you should read up on it, it’s impressive. Anyway, it was secure. It was really, really secure. And he was murdered, just like that. You have to bend over backward to explain it in any other way. But...” She took a moment to order her thoughts. “...you’re right – I don’t know that it’s true, so it’s wrong to count it as evidence. That’s basic science. But you know what else is basic science? A theory is good if it makes correct predictions. Before things happen. And that’s what my theory did. What happened to Chrysalis is exactly the kind of thing that I think happened to the dragon king. You were there. You actually saw it, unlike me.” “Yes, I did. What’s your point, Twilight?” “My point – I was getting to that. Hold on. I did more experiments since. To test my ‘phoenixes are intrinsically good’ theory. What if I tried to get Peewee to do something bad? Like, drop a rock on somepony? Well, I tried that.” “And?” “And he did. I had him drop a small rock on Rainbow Dash, who volunteered. But, of course, she just dodged it. So I tried it while she was napping. She actually agreed to that, too. And he also did it. But, again, it didn’t really hit her, because I was right there, and after I saw that Peewee complied, I caught the thing before it hit her. Well, for a while, that was it. The experiment was a success, it falsified the hypothesis. Except... well, not really. Because it wasn’t actually hurting anypony, right? I was always going to catch the rock before it hits Rainbow. So I still hadn’t done the real test. Well, you can guess where this is going. First, I chose somepony who wasn’t volunteering – which is wrong, I know, but I had no choice! It had to be wrong in order to work! ... second, I got one of these things that you can wrap around your horn that suppresses your magic. I put it on, got to my subject while she was asleep, not knowing anything, and I wished as hard as I could that Peewee would drop that damn rock on her head-” “-and he didn’t do it,” Rarity finished for her. “Yup. Of course,” she added, “it wasn’t big enough to really be dangerous. But it would have hurt. That seems to have been enough.” “I see...” Rarity’s gaze flickered a bit, then her body seemed to straighten. “Well,” she said, “I don’t believe I disagree with you anymore. You seem to have been on the right track all along. I’m, ah, sorry for doubting you.” “What?” Twilight said reflectively. “Rarity, don’t apologize for that! You questioning me has been helpful. I should have to justify myself if I do risky things. Besides, things could have gone differently. Remember when you got me to get help from another mare before contacting Peewee for the first time? That was me being reckless and you being responsible. And that it turned out to be fine doesn’t change that.” Rarity nodded, accepting the compliment. “Well then, this proves they are good at heart. Or, perhaps, ‘prove’ is too strong a term, but it certainly is a hint. Although... I suppose we can’t rule out the possibility that he merely tricked you.” Twilight nodded. “It’s possible... I don’t believe it.” “Why not?” “Maybe I’m naive,” Twilight said vaguely, “but I don’t think they are even capable of lying. Peewee only talked to me after we discovered the tower. And Philomena never really did anything, not until Luna and I were beaten by Chrysalis. It seems like they aren’t intelligent, most of the time, only when it’s important, really important, something changes. Usually, they just do what the ponies around them want.” “Alright,” Rarity said, “just give me the full picture. What do you believe, at this point?” “One of the first things Celestia wrote to me was that the difference between a phoenix and an alicorn is greater than the difference between an alicorn and a fly,” Twilight began, her tone making it rather clear that she had an answer prepared. “By every metric we have – granted, most of them aren’t good, but still – they are so much more magical than any other creature, it’s absurd. And magic does this thing that no-one understands, where if you put enough energy into it, it just gets creative, by itself. I think phoenixes have so much magic that their magic just takes over sometimes. Maybe it’s literally taking control of them. Maybe it makes them smarter for a short amount of time. Maybe what it’s like to be a phoenix is what it’s like to be dreaming. Maybe when they get smarter, that’s when they wake up. I don’t know how it works, but what I’m saying is just that they so different, just so different, that we shouldn’t expect them to even know what deception is until we do. But also...” Twilight made a pause, and when she continued, there was far more tension in her voice. “... we don’t know what the tower is, right? But whatever it is, it’s important enough that he told me to destroy it. Well, and the phoenixes killed the dragon king, I think, and they killed Chrysalis, presumably both for the greater good. If that’s how they think... or operate... then, well...” “But if you’re dead,” Rarity responded quietly, “you can’t help them anymore.” “Yeah. If he kills Rainbow or me, that won’t make us go back in there. But...” She looked up in time to see Rarity’s eyes widen. “... it would work, you know?” she whispered. “If Fluttershy were dead tomorrow, it would make me hate him, sure, but I would go back into the tower. What else could I do? It’s like you said. A one percent chance isn’t small when it comes to one of our lives.” Rarity nodded slowly. “Well,” she eventually said, “good luck, dear.” “Thanks.” For a while, none of them said anything. Then, Rarity cleared her throat. “Out of curiosity... whom did you do the experiment with? The one where you couldn’t ask for permission?” “Oh. Applejack.” Twilight gave a sheepish smile and a shrug. “She always takes naps under trees...” “We are going,” Twilight said to Peewee, who of course showed no intention of responding. “See here,” she nonetheless continued, summoning a rolled-up scroll from her desk. “This is my checklist. We weren’t so well prepared last time, clearly, but this time, we’re taking things up a notch.” Most importantly, they’d actually have their luggage this time, she added to herself. At least she was optimistic that her plans regarding this obstacle would prove to be effective. “Section one,” she began, reading from the top of the list, “water, food. Section two. Compass. Will a compass work?” That was a question which she had asked herself several times by now and which her understanding of borrowed space didn’t answer. As of now, her best guess was ‘probably not.’ But it certainly was worth a try. “Candles. Lighter. Spare lighter, in case the lighter stops working. Charged crystals. Red marker. Spare red marker. Blue marker. Spare blue marker.” Whether they’d be bold enough to actually use those, she didn’t know. “Section three. Sleeping pills, anti-sleeping pills. Painkillers. Section four. Phial of dragon fire. Yeah, I actually own one of those. Pretty great, isn’t it? Owe Cadence for that one...” Her voice trailed off as she thought back to how she had acquired this particular item, so many years ago. “... and Zecora’s potion.” What they had cut from last time where clothes, they took too much space, and for all of its problems, the tower really hadn’t been cold. “What do you think? Did we forget something? I hope not.” Peewee sat still on her desk, not responding. Twilight focused on the wish that he would come and take a look at her list, causing him to flap his wings and fly over to sit down onto her shoulder, having a clear view of what she had written – of course, presumably without comprehending it. “See?” she murmured nonetheless, a chill running down her spine. “We’re going for it.” She took a deep breath, rolling the list back together. “So don’t kill Rarity, alright?” Dear Diary, this isn’t right. None of the girls has noticed how afraid I am, but here it is. I don’t even keep a diary. Why I am telling you this? Who am I telling this? Myself? This is stupid. I’m going to burn this once I’m done. Maybe. I don’t tend to remember my dreams. But now I do. It visits me every night in my sleep. It’s started a few days after Canterlot. No one should see the swarm. I don’t care if this is the least scientific thing I’ve ever said. No one should see the swarm. This is not normal. This is not okay. It scared me when I saw it, but not like this. It was fine afterward. Before Canterlot, everything was okay. And then the nightmares have come. You know how life gets smaller when you grow older? You begin to understand things and that’s how everything shrinks. A trip isn’t an adventure anymore, it’s a thing you plan and then do and then it’s over. Days are 24 hours long and you always have a sense of where you are. This is gone. All of my safety is gone. The princess isn’t in on this. She has no clue what is in the tower. Probably not even that the tower exists. Maybe it was a mistake to write this down. It doesn’t seem to help. I don’t know. Is there life beyond the plane? On a different plane, with a different sun and moon? Another species? So far away that we will never see each other? And if they are, are phoenixes there, too? Is there a tower like this one? Are they magic itself? Are they the reason Equestria exists? Did they create Celestia and Luna? Did they create life on the plane? DId they create the plane itself? Did they create the sun and moon? A few nights ago I dreamt that I was trapped on the moon. Not metaphorically, not asleep, but actually trapped, alone and afraid and cold and there was the SWARM. The SWARM from the tower. the SWARM and it still looked kind of like dust and kind of like insects. and it lasted so long it’s not normal for dreams to be this long. and I woke up and I was still afraid after that. you know that the word nightmare comes from princess Luna? she is the nightmare. she was the mare who visited ponies’ dreams at night. but she wasn’t there. why not? i know she pays more attention to us six than most ponies. i’ve never had a scarier dream in my life and she wasn’t there. the dreams should have spoiled the secret. also it’s her moon that the tower is borrowing from but I know that this has nothing to do with Luna. I would bet my life on it right now that Luna has no idea the tower exists. this is not Nightmare Moons doing. Nightmare Moon wanted to keep Equestria in eternal night and rule. not drive her subjects into insanity. the SWARM is unnatural, it is something that does not belong here. it is so much scarier than Nightmare Moon or Chrysalis or Discord. it all feels like child’s play now. maybe it was all childs play, if we are the children and the phoenixes are out there making sure that we don’t do anything too stupid. and if we do than they go fix it. the phoenixes could kill Discord in a heartbeat if they wanted to. I know they could. but they didn’t and that means that he wasn’t important enough. the being who beat both princesses and could play with the sun and moon like toys wasn’t worth it. why should he be, we dealt with him in a day. but the tower is. the tower is real. the tower matters. I have no idea why the phoenix needs us to help but so it is. the phoenix wants the tower dead. and the SWARM. it must want the SWARM dead too. I don’t know how but it does. I’m going to take this letter out and burn it and then take a sleeping pill.
Chapter 3Dear Princess Celestia, Thank you. I’ve thought a lot about this. I can’t close my eyes from this mystery. I want to know. I don’t believe they are evil creatures. They did not harm the dragons, even after they sought to damage, perhaps kill the younglings. What little I’ve read also doesn’t point in that direction. I will be careful, though. More careful than I’ve ever been for any project. Can you explain what you meant by “don’t neglect the phoenix”? Twilight PS: The phoenix is a ‘he’. Spike has named him Peewee.
Chapter 4Dear Twilight, that is a truly terrible name. Tell Spike I am gravely disappointed. On a more serious note – no, I don’t believe phoenixes are ill-willed any more than you or I. However, remember that good intentions, even on both sides, are no guarantee for a positive outcome, as mere difference can be enough to cause harm. This is true for difference in behavior, but it is even more true for difference in magical composition. If there is another civilization out there, far beyond the known land, and if you were to meet a creature from that civilization, the difference between you two alone could be enough to cause any possible outcome. With bad luck, either or both of you could die immediately. Of all the species in Equestria (and beyond), phoenixes are the one which comes the closest to that foreign creature. The difference between a phoenix and an alicorn, in terms of magical composition, is larger than that of an alicorn and a fly. I will therefore repeat again, even after you already promised it: be careful. Be careful in interacting with them, but be even more careful if you manage to get close to their defining magic. And know that I write this because I worry about you, and that I am every bit as worried as I am proud. Princess Celestia PS: What I meant by not neglecting him is rather straightforward. Offer him food and a place to sleep. Nuts and fruits are a safe call, otherwise anything that ponies eat should be to his liking.