Prologue, Chapter, and Epilogue in One!
The Greatest Song in The World... Tribute
by Arkolo
Prologue
On one fantastical day full of fantasy and whimsy where the birds tweeted and the bees buzzed, Twilight, the purply princess of friendship, could be found avidly locked in review of a checklist.
The scroll she read was of modest length... Meaning it only ran down three flights of stairs, through the greeting room, out the hallway, away from the castle, across the streets of ponyville, through a disgruntled Carrot Top's carrot patch, and ended at the park bench where Twilight originally began her review.
A mere three dozen empty ink bottles lay strewn in a mess around the princess. There was only one left, but luckily the lovely light lavender lady of liking ponies likably was on the last few lines. Her quill was still steady and at the ready.
Her completely normal, unobtuse eyes, which were well practiced in the art of giving items overlong sessions of attention, narrowed at the last few words of her checklist of "modest" proportion. A gentle 'hmm' reverberated from the chords located in the vocal region of her nimble neck.
-~~Have Starlight Shake hooves with the mayor, and see how a real town leader should behave~~
-~~Have Starlight attend an individualist seminar~~ #not the one hosted by Iron Will this week
-~~Have Starlight send a submissive apology letter to her former cult village~~
-~~Have Starlight throw a cutesnera for somepony~~
-Have Starlight adopt a purple orphan, for friendship
-~~Help Starlight, help the crusaders, help a pony, to help themselves with a cutiemark problem~~
-Make Starlight analogous to a persnippity old fictional grump, without Starlight getting offended-
-Get Starlight a better friend than Trixie
-Go to the Crystal Empire and have Starlight practice match making with Sunset and Starburst
-~~Coerce~~ Invite Starlight to overnight camp out with the gals for general silliness and bonding
Twilight gently 'hmmed' again, and thoughtfully rubbed a hoof under her chin. A young childish voice sardonically called from behind her.
"Just pick the last one Twi..."
Spike shook his head, since he already peeked over her shoulder at the last options.
"Are you sure? I really think Starlight could benefit fr-"
"Just pick the last one, trust me."
"Oh alright, I'll go get things scheduled with the girls then."
"Good, I'll go pack some marshmallows, and you can go enjoy your 'general silliness and bonding'."
"Thanks Spike, oh, also could you take out these ink bottles for me?"
The little dragon eyed the three dozens ink bottles with a sigh. Twilight took that as a yes, and began to trot on her merry way to get her plans in array.
Reluctantly, Spike stooped over and scooped up empty ink bottles by the paw full, after a few minutes, a thought popped into his head. He muttered aloud to himself
"Have Starlight adopt a purple orphan? ..."
His brow furrowed carefully at this thought.
Chapter
Everything went just perfect. There were no problems in the planning, there were no problems in the execution. Twilight lined up all the gals' schedules and finally had a particular night acquired.
The camp out was to be very close by, in the local park in fact. Everypony that was supposed to be there, made it.
Applejack pulled up with her little supply cart, which was full of tents, fritters, firewood and a kettle.
Pinkie popped out of where she was least expected...
Rainbow Dash dived in with a tiny storm cloud in tow, which was there to help start the fire.
Rarity showed up with too much unnecessary stuff.
Fluttershy cradled a frog in one hoof, which looked like a little frog-mummy because it was covered in bandages. All the way from it's protruding eyes to webbing between it's long slimy toes. A set of medicinal bags hung on either side of her barrel, and she gentle cooed to the little creature, which was so thoroughly immobile it couldn't even croak. She would occasional mutter, "It'll be okay Mr. Boggles, we're close to pond, so I'll be able to keep your bandages wet."
And of course, Starlight showed up. She was somewhat bashful, somewhat excited.
"Hey girls, thanks for having me along with you on this camp out! It's been a really long time since I've done something like this."
The other mares responded enthusiastically.
"Aw shucks, it's our pleasure sugar-cube."
"Well hey! who wouldn't want to smoke some totally awesome marshmallows!"
"I can't wait to do the songs, and games, and stay up all night, and not sleep at all, and eat all the super-hyper-super-secret-sugar-mix I brought, and spook everypony!"
"Well, I had some nature fabrics that were simply dying to be used, and I can't pass up such a fabulous opportunity to show it off and share it! I simply must get your opinion darling!"
"It'll be okay Mr. Boggles, we're close to pond, so I'll be able to keep your bandages wet."
Lastly Twilight popped into existence amongst the group, strapped with a set of saddle bags stuffed with her trusty camping books.
"Alright, are we ready to get started girls!"
"Sure are Twi, we got everythin' set up."
The purplish princess clopped her front hooves together in a childish squeal of delight.
"Yay! So, food, then games, then stories and songs!"
So they did all that stuff for the next few hours.
All of Applejack's fritters were eaten, Rainbow Dash burnt all of her marshmallows, Rarity kept her fabulousness fairly clean and gave Rainbow Dash some of her marshmallows to practice with, Fluttershy almost had a heart attack when Mr. Boggles accidently flopped into the fire, Starlight bonded and friended like Twilight hoped, and Pinkie's super-hyper-super-secret-sugar-mix was passed around. Which caused everypony to not know what happened for about a half hour....
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"Gallee, what was in the sugar pinkie?"
Applejack groggily cracked an eye open, and discovered the campsite was a mess. Applejack had somehow tied up three of her own legs with a rope, and her hat was missing. One of Twilight's back legs poked out from underneath a gigantic book. Rainbow Dash's head was stuck in the miniature storm cloud with static blips popping here and there. Rarity was a marshmallow. Fluttershy was on her back wrapped up like a Mummy. Pinkie was no where to be seen.
Starlight, the only one who hadn't sampled a cupcake, yet, sat there, petrified with a horrified expression.
Applejack cringed a mighty cringe as she asked,
"Um, Starlight, what happened?"
But the little pony called Glimmer didn't look back at the little pony called Apple. She instead raised a trembling hoof and pointed to the edge of the campsite. It took a moment for Applejack to follow the indicated line, but eventually she realized she stared at something she didn't expect to stare at, especially now.
Princess Luna... and Celestia!
"What in tarnation?"
The farm pony quickly covered her mouth with her free hoof, feeling mortally embarrassed. There wasn't a long space of silence however, as Luna threw both of her front hooves in the air, like she just didn't care.
"We felt the merry vibrations from this location, and preposterous dreams of great giddiness echoed for the dying half of the last hour. It was like a flame that doth draw the moth!"
Celestia nodded in agreement with her sister's claim.
"It's been some time since I noticed something so jovial, say, would you mind if Luna and I joined you?"
The sun princess asked with a sunny disposition, despite it being dark outside, and with half the ponies in front of her in a grovely semi-conscious state.
For a moment Applejack, and Starlight were too flabbergasted to respond. But eventually the orange fruit pony took a deep breath, and nodded head with a slight chuckle.
"You can do whatever you want princess, -ez"
She tried and failed to be inclusive of Luna with that last part, but the moony moody princess didn't mind. She was in a good type of moody moonylicious mood right now.
"Hoozah! Then we shall commence with song! As my sister and I have practiced a piece, and would like thine opinions."
Applejack and Starlight looked at each other, then slowly turned to their diarchs.
"Well, shoot."
"Um yes princess Luna and Celestia? We'd be uh, delighted!"
Celestia broke into a cheerful smile as she leaned back, and piped up in a sunnylicious tone.
"Excellent, Luna and I are trying to come up with a few songs about some of our more exciting adventures together. We haven't shared this one with anypony besides each other so far! We call it-"
"The Most Amazing Song to Strike The Symphonies between The Heavens and The Earth!"
"-Ahem, something a little shorter, maybe like, The best song in the world."
At this point Celestia's and Luna's horns glowed, and several instruments popped into existence beside them. This included some drums and a few stylish guitars.
Starlight narrowed her eyes and tilted her head to the side.
"The best song in the world?"
"Why yes, it's quite a story really." Celestia then turned to Luna "Are you ready sister?"
Luna fitted up with some drum sticks in magical grasps, had a hoof on the bass, and held a guitar between her upper limbs.
"The practice has made out talents double!"
Then they turned the instruments for a minute while Applejack and Starlight just sat there and watched.
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"Okay"
Celestia strummed her instrument, then gave a nod to the other alicorn at her side, and the song began with a slow instrumental. Eventually the larger alabaster pony took the lead with the lyrics.
This is the song, The song which outstrips all others
And by far the most fantastic to fall upon any ear
but this is only an honorary rendition here
For the true best was sung only once
A short time ago, like a thousandish years
Me and my sista Luna here
We were trottin' down the courtyard of our old dank castle
Then without warnin'
There blustered a blustery centaur
Right over our guards
into our courtyards
and when he stopped right infront of us, HE SAID
(Celestia's voice goes all dorky and weird in an atempt to imitate the blustery centuar)
Sing the Greatest Song in the World... Or I'll eat your souls
Then me and Luna, we shared a glance, and with one voice WE BOTH SPOKE
You're on...
Luckily the first thing that popped out of our mouths
was simply destined to be
The best song in the world
Oh
The greatest song in the world
Just share a link with our eyes and comprehend
how the force of our song could make any will bend
The song was simply meant to be
Once in a while when we finally agree
and the heavens are aligned
When My sun out shines
and her moon becomes a mirror
and the earth becomes a buoy for our furor
It's hardly worth mentioning
But the oaf was beat
It became apparent to him
He simply couldn't take the heat
Then as he groveled, a question escaped his lips
(Celestia does the dork voice again)
-snort-
Are you gods?
Then we replied "Neigh" we are but mares...
Hit it!
HEEEEEYYYYAAAAAAAAA!!!
EEEEEEEYYAAAAAA
EYYAYEYAYEYAEYEYAYE
This isn't actually that song
for that song was sung only once
but this is to honor it
That song back then was the best song
Song of the world
in the world
above the world
below the world
This doesn't actually soundly like it at all either
We wish the rest of ya were immortal too
Since you're not, it's just up to you to believe
and maybe one day
YEEEEEAAAAAA!
The best! The best The best!
(And the wrap it up with a fierce instrumental)
Bring a-digga-dee-dalooo
The royal sister's finished up their piece with a grand flourish, and bad-flank stares into the distance.
Pinkie Pie popped out of Celestia's wavy mane and clapped her hooves together with much bravado. The consensus quickly spread and the rest of the Mane Six whooped and cheered, despite their various conditions. Starlight was a most raucous caboose.
"That was completely different from any other song I've heard you sing!"
Twilight poked her head out from underneath the giant book.
Rarity was a marshmallow.
"It was wonderful princess!"
Fluttershy whispered.
"It was a total radtaculoscity!"
Rainbow coolly swaggered, then ate the little storm cloud.
"Yipee-Ki-Aye that was the best 'honorary rendition' I've ever heard!"
Applejack had untied herself, and found a leftover fritter to munch.
Starlight just continued to clap, and look less nervous.
Stranger still, and ear suddenly popped out of Starlight's ear, it was long and brown, with a pink highlight on the inside. The light pinkish purplelish pony freaked out and tugged on the ear that came out of her ear, in order to pull it out, because her instincts told her that would solve the problem.
She eventually pulled an entire draconequus out of her ear, like a long string of tied together napkins. Starlight was mortified, and wore an expression equivalent to -OhmygoshohmygoshohmygoshdidIreallyjustpullthatoutmyear!- A moment later Discord un-noodled from the ground, dusted himself off, and pointed a claw at the royal sisters.
"I would have stayed spying in that former villain's ear all night, but I had to come to simply disagree with this conclusion. Of all the legendary battles and songs, and battle songs, you picked Tirek's story to be your number one? Seriously!"
Discord shrugged a shrug so hard his shoulders shrugged right off his body... Then another different voice emanated from the camp, which was sourced from the campfire itself.
"I was questioning that myself, I don't ever remember there being a song at all... And I sound nothing like that Celestia!"
Tirek's decrepit little weak face floated disturbingly in the fire. Starlight's mortified expression increased and she shouted out a hallow,
"How?"
The imprisoned centaur turned towards the pony called 'Glimmer' and casually mentioned,
"Every fire on earth is a peeping hole out of Tartarus, what? Did you expect me stare at a wall for over the last thousandish years? I mean, at least the two royal pains have the courtesy to show me what I'm missing!"
At this moment Starlight couldn't decide whether shock or mortification or embarrassment was a more appropriate expression. Her thoughts reeled back to everything she had ever done in front of a fire place, and now had the mental image of some demon or other spying on her.
The next thing in line to be weird, and just... happen, was Mr. Boggles. The little mummy wrapped frog shook violently for a second, then exploded in a burst of green flames. Fluttershy freaked, and tossed it off her lap.
A moment later queen Chrysalis stood close to the campfire.
"I agree with these other two degenerates! That song wasn't the best... Clearly I am more capable than any of you! I have any and every voice, and I can combine them!"
Chrysalis started a spurr of the moment scat that sounded like a thousand voices at once, but she was stopped before she got far, because Discord shoved the marshmellow Rarity in her mouth.
"Oh puh-leeez, Nothing can compare to my unpredictable style!"
Tirek just grumbled to himself from the middle of the fire,
"Well, I did threaten to eat you souls atleast, and I would, if I could..."
Then fire works blew up in the back ground, accompanied by rocking guitars, trumpets, and the braying of goats. A large minotaur with a neat black tie joined the edge of the campfire.
"Iron Will has the best intro around, it's got the eye of the tiger, and Iron Will is severely disappointed he didn't see any of you at his # Individualist Seminar!"
Then a blue little wizard unicorn mare butted into the campsite, and shoved the minotaur aside with sparkly magic. She gave him a dismissive snort. -In blue horse wizard's mind she thought- talking in third-pony... how conceited!
"Trixie would clearly make the greatest and most powerful song... If she wanted too, oh, Hi Starry! Sorry I'm late but this park was so hard to find!"
Then the sound of pistons and the hiss steam echoed through the campground as a large obnoxious machine rolled in. Ridden by two even more obnoxious cream colored unicorns.
"Nothing!"
"Nothing compares to the tantalizing voices of the Flim Flam brothers!"
Amongst all the excitement, and ever increasing incursion on the girls camp out night, Pinkie shouted above it all.
"Well how about everpony prove they're the best right here and now? Best campfire song!"
Celestia and Luna shared a look, shrugged, and turned to the crazy collection around the campfire. They spoke simultaneously,
"We're in. And we'll kick all your tails!"
Epilogue
The next morning everypony suffered a severe case of over-stimulation hangover... and the sun was raised an hour late, but no pony complained that.
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Then the author added eight words to finish.
Author's Note
Needed the last 8 words so I could hit 3000 exactly... hehe. Anyway, Thanks for reading! You lovely bunch of internet lurkers!
Also, if you haven't guessed, This is the song that inspired this little fic
Oh and the link in the text in the beggining, if you missed it.
