Equestria's Sudden Nutella Troubles

by TheMajorTechie

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy
Length: 1263

... Have you ever wondered what Equestria would be like if it were swamped in Nutella?

After a botched attempt at giving herself free Nutella, Twilight and the rest must brace themselves for the upcoming tsunami...

...of Nutella.

A video that gave me the idea of including Kirby: Kirby eats a never-ending bag of chips. (I watched this years ago.)

Published 2016-06-26 02:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-18 04:09:35 UTC

Equestria, in a NUTELLA-Shell

Author's Note

I really don't know what this monstrosity I wrote is. I should stop writing ideas based on ideas I come up with late at night.

Equestria, in a NUTELLA-Shell

Twilight slowly backed away from the kitchen counter.

"Spike?" She called nervously, "Could you come down here for a moment?"

Spike, sensing the urgency in Twilight's voice, rushed quickly to her side.

On the counter were two, no, four... sixteen jars of Nutella.

"Ok, Twilight, what did you do this time?"

Twilight teleported herself and Spike to a higher floor just as the first jars clattered onto the kitchen floor.

Spike tapped his claw on the table of Twilight's bedroom. "Well?"

"Well... I might've sorta... used a self-replicating duplication spell on a jar of Nutella..."

Spike raised an eyebrow. "And so now, we have an exponentially cloning batch of half-empty Nutella jars."

Twilight shrugged. "Well, granted my magical abilities, why wouldn't it happen? Everypony loves Nutella. I was just thinking that, well... if I used that spell, then we'd never have to buy more again."

"Good point," replied Spike, "but is it really worth swamping your kitchen just to have an inexhaustible supply of Nutella?"

Twilight's attention was momentarily averted by the sound of shattering glass.

"Not just my kitchen anymore..."

A low gurgling sound echoed throughout the room as the Nutella began flooding the entire floor below.

"Twilight?"

"I already heard, Spike. Let's go see how bad it is."

The two rushed to the staircase, only to find it rapidly filling with the sticky, brown, breakfast spread.

Hey.

Wait... who was that?

It's me, Twilight. You just made a narration mistake there, mister.

...How?

You called Nutella a breakfast spread. I believe that you mean 'everything spread'.

Fine, fine.

The two rushed to the staircase, only to find it rapidly filling with the sticky, brown, everything spread.

That doesn't sound right. Here, lemme narrate mysel--

Don't you have a dangerously high level of Nutella sloshing around that's threatening your life?

Twilight suddenly trembled as she was lurched back into reality. By now, the Nutella level had risen to a much higher level, quickly overtaking each consecutive step.

"Twilight, run!"

Spike dashed madly to the windows, pounding with all his might at the hardened crystal.

"Spike, it's no use, remember? And don't forget, I can teleport."

Sheepishly, Spike crawled onto Twilight's back. The second he did, the two immediately teleported out.

"Shut the doors, Twilight!"

"I already am!"

Clang

Once Twilight ensured that the doors were sealed tightly, she and Spike took off for Canterlot.

Celestia gently sipped her tea as she spoke with Prince Blueblood.

"Now, as I've said already, I am indeed, NOT your long-lost mother. In fact, your lineage hasn't had any relation with me for generations. To top that, you--"

The throne room doors threw themselves open.

Twilight leapt into the room, landing on the table. "CELESTIA. I REQUEST A TALK WITH YOU."

Spike hopped off the crazed mare's back. "Sorry, Princess. Twilight tried creating an infinite supply of Nutella. She kinda... failed."

Twilight froze, and eerily turned to face her assistant. "What's that you said about failing???"

"Oh, nothing."

Celestia nodded. "So, about this supposedly 'infinite' supply of Nutella; how did you attempt to create it?"

"It was just a self-replicating duplication spell. Why'd you ask?"

Celestia groaned. "Twilight... you've officially screwed Equestria over."

"HEY, AT LEAST I SOLVED WORLD HUNGER." Twilight snapped back.

"Yeah, by drowning everypony in Nutella."

"Fine, fine. You're right." sighed Twilight, "What should we do?"

Celestia's face began twisting in an odd way. Twilight winced as she watched what she thought was surely the breaking and reassembling of the Princess' facial bones.

Suddenly, in a strange voice that seemed just as off as her face, Celestia finally said, "Who said we were the ones to fix it?"

Celestia tossed a mop and a bucket to Twilight. "If anypony here was asked that, they'd say that you should fix it!"

Spike looked up from his face-book. He stared at Celestia for several seconds, and then looked back to the book's pages, then back to Celestia. After catching several glimpses of what Celestia's face currently looked like, he announced, "Aaaaaaand over here, we have the Great, Infamous, Trollestia!"

"Spike." Twilight growled under her breath, "Stop it."

"Ok, ok."

Spike tossed the book behind his back as he followed Twilight out the door. As he walked, he could here behind him the screams of Prince Blueblood and the cackling of a madmare.

Twilight and Spike watched from the safety of the castle balcony as Ponyville erupted with the immense Nutella-geyser that rose from Twilight's own castle.

"Ponyville... but what about your friends, Twilight?"

"Bah, who needs friends when you have Nutella?"

"Twilight, please, we need to find a way to stop this, before--"

Splat.

That was it. The moment the spell replicated itself, it multiplied the Nutella to the point of no return- within seconds, the entirety of Canterlot was utterly smothered in the spread, covering absolutely everything in it's path. All over, ponies everywhere frantically struggled to avoid the oncoming Nutella-Tsunami, which made it's slow, gooey journey across all of Equestria. The planet had become Planet Nutella, world of the chocolate goo. Aside from the hulking blobs of ponies stuffing their face with Nutella, there was nothing left. Equestria had been truly ended, once and for--

CHOMP!

...all?

Suddenly, the planet seemed utterly devoid of disaster. Somehow, the Nutella had just seemingly vanished from existence. The cause of all that?

Twilight powered down the portal as Kirby burped.

"Well then."

Spike flipped through the Portal Handbook. "We did it. We saved Equestria the moment destruction hit. Using a pink blob."

Kirby burped again.

BONUS CHAPTER 2: Alternate perspective of the Nutella Flood

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

BONUS CHAPTER: Enter />/ Kirby

Just a short bonus chapter about how Twilight found Kirby. :moustache:

Twilight stepped out the other side of the portal, Spike clinging to her back.

"Twilight, where are we?"

"I really don't know, Spike," Twilight replied, "I just set the portal to 'Random Location' and started it."

Spike facepalmed. "You really seem to be screwing stuff up more than usual, y'know."

"Yeah, I know, and--"

Twilight never got around to finish speaking before being swallowed whole by a particular pink blob.

"Ugh... where are we?"

Twilight lit her horn. "It appears that we have been consumed by one of the natives of this land, Spike."

Kirby muffled a burp as he continued on his way.

"Hey!"

Kirby paused, listening for the source of the sudden talking.

"Listen!"

Suddenly, Kirby spat out a small speck of light.

"Hey listen, Kirbster, you just swallowed the pony that created me a few seconds ago. Do ya mind if you uh... let them out?"

Before even answering, Kirby let out a massive belch, echoing throughout the entire land, breaking glass within a 200-mile radius. From his now smoking mouth, emerged two beings, a winged unicorn, and a small lizard-like thing.

Twilight brushed out her mane, and levitated a *short* list to Kirby. "Now then, now that we're out, I'd like to ask you a question..."

Spike continued off Twilight's talking, "... or a few hundred."

Kirby sat in the midst of the confusion, clearly puzzled by the mythical creatures that emerged from his mouth.

"Do you like Nutella?"

Author's Note

A few years back, my friend and I came up with a nickname for Kirby: The Pink Elastic Waistband.