Left 4 Dead 2: Last Man...erm...and Pony On Earth

by LukeTheMercenary

Dead Center: Street

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In the safe house made from the main lobby...

"So, tell me more about this Equestria place. Are you sayin that's where more of you ponies are?" Ellis asked, eagerly.

"Exactly! However, I think I'm nowhere near my home." Applejack responded.

"Hey, try not to worry about it. We'll think of somethin. Not really sure what somethin is, but I think we will figure it out."

Applejack starts to frown, then Ellis tries his best to cheer her up.

"Hey, look on the bright side: I'm here to help you, and there's an evacuation center nearby. Oh! I know a gun store that we are close to, if you wanna see some real weapons."

"Are those...uhh...weapons over there?" AJ asked, pointing at the front desk in the safe room.

Ellis looks at the front desk and drops his axe. There were three guns on the table: a standard wooden pump shotgun, a suppressed MAC-10 submachine gun, and a custom pistol. The funny thing was all these weapons had flashlights attached to them. Anyways, Ellis wished he could take them all, but knowing the limited space he had, he only took the pistol and shotgun. While he was loading up his guns and grabbing ammunition from a rather unorganized pile of bullets, he noticed AJ took an interest in the shotgun. Seeing an opportunity for another conversation, he decided to explain a little.

"This here is a gun. A weapon type that a lot of humans, especially people like me, use. Now, I know nothing about chemistry, but I know this: guns need these little things called bullets. Bullets come in all sorts of shapes, sizes, and functions. They use a chemical reaction to launch pieces of metal that hit things that you point them at. Phew. I just sounded like my sixth grade science teacher." Ellis said.

"Uhh...so...they're tubes that metal comes out from?" Applejack asked.

"...Yeah, basically."

After that awkward moment, Ellis goes to the other safe room door and lifts the metal bar holding it locked.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'll follow you." AJ responded.

Ellis then kicks open the red door and goes outside. Fresh air finally enters his lungs. For a few minutes, both Applejack and Ellis were sitting against a wall. Bringing in more and more clear air. Their bliss was interrupted by an odd sound. Again, it was unfamiliar to them both, but they continued to listen. It sounded like if someone was drooling, but they were slurping it up from their lips. Not wanting to stick around to see a face to go with the sound, they make their way down a road, only to find it, you guessed, blocked off by a fence and some old cars. After entering a room and finding another road, the drooling sound was extremely close. They crossed through a patch of grass to the other side, but there seemed to be no way through.

"Now what?" Applejack asked.

"I dunno...oh! Over that dumpster. We can get to the other side." Ellis pointed to a ladder connected to the dumpster."

"Ell, look out!"

Ellis looks behind him to notice an extremely vile looking zombie. It was a woman with a jaw that hung down farther than naturally, a slightly chubby stomach, sagging breasts, and a very thin body. Unnaturally thin. If it wasn't gross enough, the creature then spat out a baseball-sized compact ball of goo. When it hit the ground, it exploded and made a mess of sizzling goo right beneath out protagonist's feet and hooves.

"Oh, great. Now they're spittin shit at us!" Ellis said, jumping away from the puddle.

"What's wrong?" Applejack asked, completely unharmed by the acidic slime.

"Duck! Head down!"

Applejack did so, without anything else touching the now evaporating goo. Ellis took aim, and nailed the spitting zombie in the chest. It died almost instantly, acid spilling from the holes in its stomach. When all the acid disappeared, Ellis was puzzled by Applejack's immunity to the spitter's acid.

"How...did that not hurt you? A small amount splashed on my arm and it still burns a little!" Ellis asked, his slightly loud voice echoing.

"Hey, I work on a farm. My hooves callused every day. I felt nothing." Applejack responded, calmly.

"I guess working on cars doesn't make my skin thicker."

After that somewhat horrifying incident, they climb over the dumpster and head into another room. After climbing some stairs, they find another table with some better weapons. Ellis took a look at the three guns before him: a desert rifle, a hunting rifle, and an AK-47. Ellis decided to go with the AK since he knew it was a very powerful weapon. Then, he spots a medical box on the wall. When he opened it, he saw two small bottles of pain reliever pills. He placed one in his pocket, and he had Applejack put the other in her hat. They noticed that they were above a road, so they had to jump onto a portable toilet to get to the ground. After going into a building and crossing a bridge, Ellis noticed something.

"Hey, I recognize this! The gun store is just up ahead." Ellis said, excitedly.

"Wait, you hear somethin?" Applejack asked.

"Yeah, sounds like an old motor, or an old machine."

"Uh oh...one of those charging things!"

There was a honking noise and a loud series of quick footsteps. Elis grabs Applejack and jumps to the side. Another charging zombie had come to try and kill them. Ellis finished it off pretty easily with his assault rifle, so the panic was short-lived. Anyways, they crossed the rest of the bridge, and when they went down another patch of stairs, they finally arrived at "Whitaker's Gun Store". Well, if Ellis wasn't excited earlier, he definitely was now. He must have had a gungasm at the sight of all that firepower.

"Oh my god, it's Christmas!" Ellis yelled like a kid in a candy store.

"Wow, you humans have an odd taste in weapon designs." Applejack said, observing an auto shotgun.

"That may be so, but...oh man, I've wanted one of these rifles since I was nine!" Ellis said, picking up an M16.

Ellis then drops his dinky little pistol and replaces it with a desert eagle. After grabbing a hefty amount of ammunition, he headed for the back door and tried to open it. When it didn't budge, he looked for something to use. the only thing he spotted was a control panel with a red button on it. When he pressed it, the unexpected happened:

"Hello there. I've barricaded myself on the roof with ammo and provisions. But in my haste, I forgot cola! So here's my proposition: you go find me some cola at the food store, I'll clear the path to the mall for you." the supposed store owner said through the loudspeaker.

"Yeah, we get it: a man needs his snacks!" said Ellis.

"You may want to hurry now, before I change my mind."

When the owner finished that last sentence, the door suddenly opened. Wasting no time, Ellis and Applejack quickly spot the grocery store.

"Allow me," Applejack said, charging up her legs. Getting ready to buck the doors open.

The second she kicks the doors open, the alarm sounds. The ran like hounds looking for drugs inside the store, scouting every corner for some sign of cola. Finally, Ellis spots a six-pack of cola in glass bottles.

"Alright, AJ I got the dude's cola! Let's go let's go let's go!" Ellis yelled.

They both ran out of the store as fast as they could, but then they realized that there were more noises than just the alarm. Ellis set the cola down and got in a battle stance. At the same time, a hunter and a charger came out and tried to kill them. Ellis killed the charger with ease, but the hunter was too fast. It managed to sneak up on Applejack, and it pounced on her. She quickly kicked it off and it stumbled back. She gave it a head-butt and sent it flying, and it broke its neck on a car. This boosted Applejack's confidence a little bit. Anyways, Ellis grabbed the cola and they both ran back up the stairs, where they were met with a metal door with a slot at the bottom.

"Quick! Put it in the damn slot!" the gun store owner said.

Ellis places the cola in the slot and closes it. For about three seconds, it was all quiet. Suddenly, a rocket flies from the roof and hits a truck, blowing it up and revealing a path that goes straight to the mall.

"Yee haw!" Applejack Yelled in celebration.

"Now that's how you clear a path!" Ellis yelled.

"Good luck gettin to the mall!" said the gun store owner.

Without hesitation, they pass through the rubble of the truck and find themselves in a large parking lot, but all they saw was empty tents. When they got in front of the mall, they still heard nothing.

"Hope we're makin' the right call by goin to this mall." Ellis said.

"But...why is it so quiet?" Applejack asked.

"I guess it's inside."

They find an opening to the mall, only to discover that it's a safe room. Ellis shuts the door and barricades it before saying:

"Okay, that was close. I mean, shit man, that was straight up close!"


Author's Note

Hi! hope you guys like the second part of this story. And before you ask...yes. I do intend on doing all 5 campaigns. Sorry, I will not do DLC chapters.

Oh, and I have a question for you fans: Would you guys and gals like this to be a romance story? Just a thought. If enough people say yes, I just might do so. Or I'll just do it anyways if I feel like it. :twilightsheepish:

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