So you've been magically transported to Equestria...

by Pendo

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other
Length: 7323

A handy guide for getting by in a world of magic and talking ponies.

After more and more humans began arriving in Equestria, the Princesses commissioned a guide to be written for new visitors to help them acclimate to life here with ease.

Containing sections on various topics including magic, Equestrian history, language and employment opportunities for humans, this guide will help day-to-day life go smoothly during your time here.

The complete story is also at:
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8022393/1/So_youve_been_magically_transported_to_Equestria

Published 2012-06-23 09:44:03 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-23 09:44:03 UTC

Magic headaches and being polite

If you're reading this, you have been magically transported into the land of Equestria. Yes, the one from the TV show. No, no one is sure how or why it happened, but people are working on the issue. A way to return you to Earth hasn't yet been found, and it isn't known how long you can expect to be stuck here.

That should answer your first questions.

I was apparently the first human to be transported here, and in time, more humans began to arrive. The Princesses requested that I prepare some information to help the newcomers get over their shock and settle in as painlessly as possible. Until such time as the Unicorns discover a way to send us back, these scrolls will provide you a quick guide on living in Equestria. Read them over carefully, as some of it is of immediate concern to you directly.

Follow the pony that gave you this scroll, you'll be directed to a place you can bunk down, relax, and peruse more detailed information regarding life here.

Right now, you're sore in ways you didn't know possible. This is natural. Magic, whatever it is, however it works, exists in a much greater 'density' or perhaps a different 'frequency' in Equestria then on Earth. Either way, your body needs time to adjust to the sudden shift. You may also get headaches at sun- and moon-rise, a result of the outpouring of magical power used by the Princesses to raise the sun and moon.

The time needed to acclimate varies from person to person, but the process takes a month on average. Until then you are particularly disruptive to magical effects and creatures, which includes ponies, so please resist any immediate urges to glomp, cuddle or otherwise manhandle them – it's been described to me as an unpleasant numbing/disorienting sensation as the magic flowing through their bodies is thrown out of alignment. Once your system has adjusted to the local magical energies, you are free to hug ponies and interact with other magical phenomena to your heart's content.

On the inevitable question of whether humans can learn to use magic…It's complicated. More on that later.

You also need to be aware that this world has so far been viewed through the lens of a rated-for-kids TV show. Here, ponies bleed, swear, die, breed, and the outhouses are not filled with sparkles and rainbows. Accidents and the odd crime do happen and there are some very dangerous creatures out there. You may have already met the local militia or constabulary, or even the Royal Guard if you appeared near Canterlot. While Equestria is almost as peaceful as the TV show portrays, each of these groups exists for a very good reason.

Continuing on that subject, what you saw on TV was not a 100% accurate word-for-word depiction of pony life, what was said by whom, and recent notable events as covered by the various episodes. The most obvious difference will be things like tools and furniture, which are made by-ponies-for-ponies, and not the recognizable human designs that ponies are portrayed using in the TV show.

Finally, please refrain from acting as if watching the show has made you an expert on this world and the people living here. Besides raising the disturbing implication of complete strangers having a window into one's private thoughts and moments, some of the more obsessive human arrivals have caused no small amount of trouble, particularly when the details of a certain pony's life did not match up to their expectations.

Being one of a group of large, strange, and potentially dangerous creatures which have suddenly appeared without explanation, you will be under increased scrutiny while you live in Equestria. This is not to say humans are discriminated against or subject to any unusual restrictions, but you can expect local authorities to pay closer attention to your activities, and they will swiftly investigate anything that may be construed as dangerous or harmful to country and populace.

If you have a problem with this, I suggest visiting the Canterlot dungeons and taking it up with the latest residents. Humans have arrived acting as if a particular pony was their true love or had assaulted 'characters' that they didn't like. One human had the bright idea to attack Unicorns to drink their blood in the hopes of gaining magical powers.

The Princesses hope you understand the modest precautions they must take to ensure the safety of their subjects.

Pony Languages

Your first real hurdle to living here is the language barrier. If you haven't already experienced one, translation spells are clumsy and imperfect, unsuited for constant use even without considering your current anti-magical nature. You'll need to pick up the basics at least, and there are tutors who can assist you.

The exact history and structure of Equestrian language is an argument only of interest to academics, but what you need to know is that each of the three races – Earth Pony, Pegasus, and Unicorn, has their own distinct dialect. Enough loan-words and common structure exists between them that learning just one is often enough to get by, and you'll naturally pick up bits of the other two in time.

Earth Pony is very simple and direct. It is mainly concerned with things like building, farming, various trades, and to a lesser degree, warfare. Without fine dexterity, Earth ponies were limited in how they could write, and their alphabet consists of simple combinations of lines and dots, which evolved out of the practice of making marks in the dirt with their hooves.

This is the simplest language used in Equestria and a few places beyond, spoken by most everyone you'll meet. Personally, I recommend starting your studies here.

Pegasus is slightly more complex, and is considered something of a romance language. Naturally, it has extensive terminology dedicated towards weather, flight, and various atmospheric phenomena. Since communication in Equestria has always been heavily dependent on Pegasi carrying messages, their language also deals with mercantile matters – many contracts are written in Pegasus. Using their wings to write by dipping the tip of their longest, finest feather in ink, Pegasus is written with large flowing lines that curve and overlap, with lots of smaller tics above and below the main line. Pegasus calligraphy is quite beautiful, and those that can manipulate their wings with such great precision become minor celebrities.

The basics of Pegasus aren't terribly difficult to learn, but expect to trip over the subtle infections and extensive conjugation. The script is tricky as well.

Unicorn is the pony equivalent of Latin – it is highly exacting, long-winded, and has not changed in some time. It has fallen somewhat out of common usage, but because of the constant experimentation and intellectual pursuits unicorns are famous for, it continues to dominate in technical, magical and mathematical usage. Both Earth and Pegasus Ponies have their unique terms, slang, and shop-talk, but when experts want precise communication, they use Unicorn. Since telekinesis allows for fine manipulation of writing implements, Unicorn script could become highly detailed and very complex. It has a vague resemblance to some Asian alphabets, with simple characters for individual letters which combine into more complex symbols to encompass various concepts.

Because of Unicorn's uncommon usage in daily live and its sheer complexity, I strongly recommend against trying to make this dialect your first subject of study.

Getting along

Fortunately for everyone, and not just the basement-dwellers among us who are lacking in certain social graces, Pony society is not difficult to integrate into.

The 'Ponies' who live in Equestria don't call themselves such, and I only use that word here as a stand-in for the sake of convenience. Try not to let it affect how you perceive them. They are not 'animals' so refrain from talking to/about them as if they were.

Be aware of your size. It's embarrassing, and more importantly dangerous, given your weight, to trip over a local. If you need to talk to someone for more then a few sentences, it's considered polite to kneel down. If you won't be in the way of anyone, just sit. If you must stand, stand back far enough that you aren't looming over anyone. The laws of personal space still apply.

Ponies are very sociable. There are jerks and even the rare bigot, but they otherwise lack the comically overwrought social fears that humans have been piling up lately. Even in large cities, there is a certain small-town mentality. Everyone knows your name, no one freaks out when a stranger talks to a child, and few doors are locked at night. Most doors don't even have locks. This doesn't mean that certain limits aren't in place. Just as in human society, certain behaviors are socially unacceptable. Just because they walk around naked doesn't mean you should stare. Or that you are free to follow their example. Please, just keep the damn pants on.

Ponies are pretty mellow, and you should find fitting in not much harder then if you traveled to a different country on Earth. It's just a matter of watching, getting involved, and learning the unwritten rules.

That being said…

Human brains are incredibly complex things, wired for empathy towards other humans through a range of inbuilt instincts. Consciously or not, we recognise the shape of a human face, find ourselves reacting to body language, and pick up the subtle chemical cues given off by others.

But in Equestria, Humans are not the sole sapient species. The simple Human/not Human distinction we grew up with begins to distort. You can expect to meet Ponies, Griffons, Dragons, and a great many others who all meet the criteria of 'person' rather then 'animal.' A final layer of confusion is added by the resemblance of various locals to certain terrestrial animal species, which is guaranteed to mess with your head in ways you can't yet imagine.

You may find yourself retreating into old patterns of behavior by speaking to and handling them as you would a pet. Or you may get along so well you find yourself inexplicably attracted to a local. It's an awkward process that we all go through sooner or later. How you choose to deal with it is entirely up to you, and Equestrian society thankfully expects little more then simple politeness in your dealings with others.

And I really wish you freaks would stop asking…

Yes, inter-species relationships do happen. They are extremely rare, and while they do not suffer from any great stigma, neither are they particularly well-received. Just as humans were built to be, 99% of Ponies will only ever be sexually attracted to another pony. In the majority of cases, this means that when a Pony from that 1% grew attached to someone, that someone was most likely a member of their own species' 99% and incapable of returning such affection. A handful of such famous stories have been immortalized in literature as romantic tragedies.

And if you are one of those exceptions, and you find someone capable of accepting you…

Despite what some rather embarrassing rumors floating around may say, I cannot offer any great advice on this subject. Pursuing such a thing is an extremely personal choice for all involved. Expect a great many unknowable hurdles before you, as these relationship are such rare occurrences. I can only suggest that you pursue the matter with great care and patience.

Jobs and Technology

Now that your arrival has been registered with the Equestrian government and you have a temporary place to bunk for the night, you can get on with the business of day-to-day life with talking ponies for neighbors and co-workers.

Yes. You actually have to work for a living here.

While ponies are tough for their adorably tiny size (compared to us humans) a human has some respectable muscle to throw around, and is capable of feats of manual dexterity that only unicorns can exceed with magic. Ponies are slowly warming up to the idea of hiring human workers, and barring certain fields (based on technologies that do not exist here) there is a small but growing range of employment opportunities.

For those humans proven trustworthy and capable, there is very rewarding, but extremely dangerous work in the Equestrian military. Borders must be patrolled, monsters slain or driven off, and ponies escorted through the wilderness on various journeys.

Human art and music has received a varied reception so far, and I stress the need for you to contact existing schools, studios and performing groups to learn about the local trends, tastes, tools, and materials involved in Equestrian artistry. It is not impossible for the artistically inclined to make a living here, once you know what you're working with.

Ponies have no particular aversion to advanced technology, considering it little more then another sort of magic. However, by Royal Decree, Human scientists must abide by a similar system of licensing and oversight that Unicorns are regulated by when engaged in potentially dangerous magical experimentation.

This generally requires providing an overview of what you are creating or hoping to accomplish, any potential dangers or side-effects, etc. Unless the process or result is deemed too dangerous, polluting, or disruptive to society, the license is likely to be issued.

Speaking of technology, you'll find Equestria to exist somewhere along early Renaissance lines, but deficient in some areas and highly refined in others. Having magic meant many technologies were deemed redundant and never developed. On the other hand, magic could substitute for tools and power sources that were otherwise impossible to build at that level of technology, allowing experimentation and construction of some impressive techno-magical devices. But be aware that the high magical ambiance also interferes with and tweaks many phenomena and processes, whether chemical, technological, or physical. Otherwise, the laws of physics act mostly as you expect them to.

I stress the 'mostly' part. The chapter on magic has more details.

The Everfree Forest

While the majority of Equestria is a strangely static environment, requiring the attention of Ponies to alter the plant life, weather, and even the cycles of day and night, the Everfree forest is the exception.

An exceedingly dangerous exception.

Don't be fooled into thinking that the 'natural' growth of plants and changes in weather makes this place anything like Earth. The Everfree forest is, magically speaking, somewhere between a toxic waste dump and a nuclear disaster area.

Deep within the forest is the site of the final battle between the Princesses and Discord. While it ended in his defeat, the immense outpouring of his unique brand of chaotic magic during the course of the fight left an indelible stain on the magical energies of the area. In the years that followed, the Ponies were forced to abandon the castle that would have been the capital of the new kingdom, and resettle several towns far afield when the forest began to spread at an unnatural rate.

The name of the place itself is a clue to its origins. Reputably, Discord's last words were screamed in defiance, that this place, at least, would remain Ever Free of the Princesses' desire for peace and order.

Today, a magical barrier prevents further growth of the forest into Equestrian land. A series of small forts house the spells along with a garrison of Ponies who maintain a physical watch for any dangerous creatures that might slink out. Unicorns tune the barrier and maintain a constant monitor over the local magical fields.

Despite the dangers, the Everfree forest sees a great many visitors. There's always something new to discover and pick apart, and ponies have made their fortunes bringing back unique treasures created in the strangeness of this place. Armed guards frequently escort logging expeditions, foraging parties, and the occasional tourist with more courage then good sense.

When I went hunting for food here, I traveled alongside heavily-armed Pony patrols. No matter how tough you think you are or whatever prior experience you may have with hunting, doing anything less is practically suicide.

The forest consists of three rough sections. The relatively 'safe' outer layer is a stretch of forest, mostly ordinary beyond the extremely rapid growth of the greenery. Things become increasingly worse the farther in you travel, where the usual dangers of untamed wilderness are concealed, enhanced, and warped beyond recognition by magic.

The Deep Wood is an unstable, marshy wetland that holds a documented assortment of horrible ways to die, from magical parasites, giant carnivorous plants, and harmless-looking 'normal' animals that secrete lethal poisons. Beyond that is the wide array of actively predatory monsters. Every one of them is different, they all want to kill you, and sooner or later, there's an entirely new batch mutated by the Deep Woods and given a fresh set of lethal tricks to end you with. By the time you start running to safety, the landscape will have already changed beyond recognition.

And if you're stupid enough to go looking for the center of it all, the Heart of Chaos, well…no human has yet tested their resistance to magic against it. Even if you were to survive the experience, the border patrols have the orders and authority to kill-on-sight any mutated creature they perceive to be a threat. Whatever or whomever it may have originally been.

A Brief History Lesson

Princesses Celestia and Luna. They are leaders both secular and spiritual to Pony-kind, having ruled for as long as history has been reliably recorded. Backed by enormous magical powers and the ingrained reverence that comes from generations of Ponies knowing their unbroken rule, the Princesses are often believed to be timeless and truly immortal.

While the Human leaders of some ancient cultures were deified and worshipped, or modern societies based upon cults of personality, the Princesses have never laid claim to a divine nature. The awe that Ponies feel for them could easily grow into an insane, fanatical devotion, a fact which the Princesses are fully aware of and work to prevent. Ponies may hold holidays of remembrance and veneration of the Princesses' deeds, but there are no temples or religions dedicated to them.

At least, not openly.

There's far more detailed information available if you wish to study it, but I've put together a quick history lesson that should covers the basics of Equestria's past.

The oldest relics suggest an era of pony pre-history dating back to approximately 2500 – 3500 years ago, with some fragments even suggesting the Princesses were alive at that time. Reliable records only begin from around 1200 to 1300 (local) years ago. Before then, the three pony races lived in separate settlements and kept mostly to their own kind. They were bound together by the necessities of survival, maintaining the stability of the heavens, sky, and earth, and often squabbled among each other. Unless trade or a dire need for mutual assistance required it, the three races rarely interacted.

Things changed with the coming of Discord (there is still a superstitious taboo against mentioning His name, or entities of His nature, please refrain from doing so in casual company) who took a sadistic interest in the three pony races. Historians presume the chaotic being did so because they were slowly overcoming old animosity and coming together in Harmony, something antithetical to his tastes. The chaos of this period destroyed records and distorted time itself, making it impossible to precisely set the dates involved. Little but oral tradition exists to recount events, but eventually the two Princesses appeared with the Elements of Harmony and petrified Him in a stone prison, a static shape to confine and metaphysically oppose His mercurial nature.

I take this point to mention that no one is exactly sure of the origin of the twin princesses. (Possibly including the Princesses themselves, but they do not discuss the matter.) Common legend states that they either arrived here or were born during the chaos, marked by destiny or some other vaguely-defined force of goodness. After setting out to discover/recover/construct the Elements of Harmony (which are equally poorly understood) they returned and ended the time of strife. Grateful pony-kind immediately offered them rulership of a new, unified country.

But old habits died hard, and unification was slow and difficult. The princesses were faced with the daunting task of uniting the old systems – Earth Pony democracy, independent Pegasus city-states, and the old Unicorn senate – under the new monarchy

The princesses persevered, brought the leaders of the various settlements together in negotiation and won ponies to their cause with intelligence and charisma, and simply out-lived the most stubborn opposition. The initial mash-up was a very clumsy system that required the constant work of the Princesses to keep things from falling apart. As the bond between ponies grew stronger over time and old prejudices disappeared, the princesses introduced reforms and cleaned up the worst of it.

Most matters of state are now handled during tea-parties that double as meetings between groups of democratically-elected 'senators' who are chosen to represent a major city, a group of smaller settlements, or even a tiny village. The full assembly of the Equestrian senate is only required if something must be decided upon that would effect Equestria as a whole. Political policy and structures that have been carefully refined over the centuries means this rarely happens more then once every decade or so.

Taboo Subjects

There are a few questions raised by the TV show that you may have picked up on. I've gathered my findings and theories here in order to spare everyone a great deal of unpleasantness. Pass this note along to other humans after reading it. I hope you'll have the good sense to never bring up these matters in public conversation. They are very personal, very painful subjects for all involved.

Voice them carelessly or disrespectfully at your own peril.

Celestia and Luna being 'Princesses' rather then 'Queens.'

When Equestria was first founded, many desired to have positions of power in the new order. The simplest way to accomplish this was to marry one of the princesses. Some historians paint a picture of the last conflict between the three Pony races, a bloody shadow-war being waged to promote their best as suitors while eliminating any rivals. Some modern plays and literature touch on the subject, but always cast the events in a more comedic light. Regardless, both Celestia and Luna were eventually wed.

But whatever the true character of their suitors, any dreams of dynasty and one race being first-among-Ponies were quickly destroyed. With the Princesses' longevity, control of the throne would never pass to their children. In time, anyone who may have harbored such schemes, along with those offering genuine love, simply grew old and faded away.

After the death of their husbands, Queens Celestia and Luna were technically Princesses once again, a title they have retained ever since.

As painful as the prospect of outliving their spouses must have been, the Princesses would each fall in love a few times more, and the cycle would repeat. Unable to take the throne of an immortal ruler, the descendants of the Alicorns turned the wealth and influence they were born into towards forming a new caste in Equestria's social structure – the nobility. The question of whether they contribute meaningfully to the country or merely leech off its wealth depends entirely on who you ask, and on who might be listening. They are still the descendants of the Princesses, after all.

The emergence and sealing of Nightmare Moon

About 1100 years ago, Equestria was still an untamed land. Dangerous creatures roamed deep into the country on occasion, hunting Ponies indiscriminately until being driven off. The night was thus a dangerous time, when the worst of monsters would be boldest and all decent Ponies were barricaded inside their homes. Never celebrated as loudly as her sister, Luna was soon viewed more as an entity to be placated then revered, even though she had no influence over the monsters that roamed the night,

A person uses magic according to their nature. As resentment built within Luna's heart, it was reflected in her appearance and powers. Ponies viewed her transformed state as the true face of the creature of evil some had always thought her to be, and the cycle fed upon itself. At some point for reasons unknown, this process accelerated dramatically until Luna refused to lower the moon one morning, and she was revealed to have completely changed in personality.

With no warning and no alternative, it was all Princess Celestia could do to seal Luna into the moon. Intrinsically tied to the celestial body, it was hoped that re-connecting Luna to the source of her powers would help Celestia to purge whatever had corrupted her sister. However, Celestia's connection to the Elements of Harmony was then broken, turning a place of healing into a prison for the being that now called herself Nightmare Moon.

Celestia and Luna losing their connection to the Elements of Harmony

The explanation offered among the scholars willing to speak on the matter suggest that in being forced to fight her sister, Celestia lost something – perhaps she thought was she had done was too cruel, or felt she had failed her sister, or despaired at what she had been forced to do. Banishing her sister had caused a wound that crippled her ability to feel kindness, laughter, or loyalty to the point that she could never attune to the Elements as she once did.

Likewise, the violent shift in Luna's nature could be reversed, but never forgotten. Traces of the Nightmare Moon persona remain in her psyche like a physical scar. What Luna suffered through has so far blocked all attempts to reform her connections to the Elements of Harmony.

Food and Medicine

On the issue of feeding yourself, I am happy to say that not every living creature in Equestria is sapient. The vast majority are animals comparable to those on Earth, and barring the opinions of a PETA activist, it is not considered murder should you act on your craving for steak. The local equivalent to steak, I should say.

Ponies themselves do not eat meat, but they are not absolute herbivores. Eggs and oils are common in many recipes. They make use of various animal products (leather goods, tallow for candles, etc.) but you won't find any cutie marks involving a bloody knife decapitating a cow, or such. As there is so little call for meat in Equestria, there is very little hunting and animal husbandry practiced, since Ponies view such waste in the same way most humans view poaching an animal simply for its skin or horns. This leaves you stuck to a mainly vegetarian diet unless you learn to hunt and fish for yourself, which can be very dangerous. (Refer to the chapter regarding the Everfree forest.)

Due to the similarities between the intelligent species of this world and the non-intelligent species of Earth, familiarize yourself with the known sapient races of Equestria before you begin hunting, to avoid any…mishaps.

Although expensive, you can also place orders for dried or preserved goods through out-of-country traders. I recommend speaking with those Pegasus who make rounds through Griffon lands. Also, please refrain from any obnoxious shows of eating meat around Ponies. It tends to freak them out – meat-eating is something they instinctively associate with monsters and dangerous predators. Intentionally doing such things in front of Fluttershy will earn you a beating.

It's a new law they had to pass. Goddamn some people…

You should make it aware if you have any particular medical issues as soon as possible after arriving in Equestria. The details of human biology are still little-known here, and the initial period of magical-overload can exacerbate some existing problems and prevent magical care. Some foods here are similar enough to those on Earth to trigger existing or all-new allergic reactions.

Thankfully, the similarities in biology and anatomical structures means that your average Pony doctor is not working blind when treating injured humans. Many doctors in more cosmopolitan areas have experience with treating many different species, and can make well-educated guesses on how to apply the proper treatments. When factoring in magical assistance, Pony doctors can handle almost any common injury or condition you may suffer here.

Magic

I have no precise, scientific answers to give you regarding 'magic.' Despite centuries of detailed experimentation by local Unicorns, there is no neat system that fully and reliably explains its nature, structure, or behaviour. It is a force that does not appear to be generated from any mundane energy, process or material we Humans are familiar with. It reacts to and can affect in turn almost every known aspect of the universe, and possibly more.

But when regarding magic, what you need to be aware of is how it can change things from what you expect to what should not be possible. The strangeness here is in the exceptions, rather then manifesting as a new set of rules. Things here still fall down, not sideways. Fire is hot, water is wet.

As an example, unicorns have astrological models of their solar system and the bodies that move in it. They understand that their world turns as it orbits the sun, and that Celestia and Luna can control the cycles of day and night. Physics ensures the former, and magic allows the latter. These facts do not conflict.

I suggest you just don't think too hard about it.

It's not something you generally have to worry about anyways. Magic mainly works 'in the background' by subtly tweaking forces beyond your perception. For example, the monsters created in the depths of the Everfree Forest are still organic creatures that can be dissected and analyzed. In the end, while their shapes and abilities may be improbable, they are never outright impossible. Magic bends the rules, and a lot of magic can stretch the rules pretty far, but that does not mean that magic has no rules of its own.

Speaking for day-to-day life, you've seen that magic lends a certain static quality to the landscape. The world changes slowly, depending on the actions of its inhabitants to kick-start certain processes.

Earth Ponies have a facility with all things related to the Earth, and to a lesser degree, any solid matter. Where they work, plants grow and bear fruit. Stone crumbles easily where they mine, and holds solid where they build.

The Pegasus Ponies are aligned with the sky and its energies. Magic allow them to fly despite their bodies' imbalanced equations of weight, air displacement, and aerodynamics. Their passage stirs the air and directs the weather. They walk on and sculpt clouds.

Unicorns are unique among ponies for their huge variety of possible magical affinities, whereas the specialties of individual Earth and Pegasus Ponies fall somewhere within broad but well-defined fields. Unicorns 'spells' are simply repeatable ways of pushing magic in a certain way to get a certain result. Creating reliable spells that can be taught to others is a long and grueling process of experimentation, which does not require, but is made easier by, an understanding of mundane science.

Spellcasting is not a discipline limited to Unicorns. Earth Ponies can learn to 'hold' tools with telekinetic force or even cause small cracks and breaks to form or mend through sheer willpower. A simple extension of Pegasus flight-magic allows them to create gusts of wind with a wave of their wings, or leave a contrail of storm clouds in their wake. It is very difficult, comparable to a human taking control of an unconscious process like digestion, breathing, or heartrate. Most prefer to refine a few simple spells to perfection, as while a talented Pony can perform a wide array of effects, magic is an intrinsic part of one's nature, and trying to push it too far in different directions can have strange side-effects upon a Pony.

Dragons and other races have their own innate abilities and views of magic. Some pursue paths resembling alchemy or shamanism, building systems of magic and training each generation to refine their abilities.

Of course, this is all secondary to the one question you've probably asked every Unicorn that crossed your path, haven't you?

Can a human use magic?

The short answer is 'yes.'

The long answer is 'probably not without going insane in the process.'

Maybe you're seeking magic out of pure childish wonder. Maybe you see it as the answer to all your problems. It's 'awesome' or 'cool' or just a substitute for technology.

But few people handle power well. When someone is stronger, or smarter, or acquires some form of power or influence to lord over others, the effects on their personality is profound. When they use this power to (mis)handle situations, sacrificing morality to receive instant gratification, their success only proves to them that this was the 'right' thing to do. The cycle continues, feeding upon itself.

When magic is involved, the effect is greatly magnified. Just ask Nightmare Moon.

Magic shapes and is shaped by a person's nature and unconscious desires. A person that uses magic carefully and for the right reasons stays healthy and sane. A person who does not…does not stay healthy and sane.

Saints, Taoist Immortals, wizards…in various mythologies, it was the work of a lifetime, or even several, to acquire supernatural power. Here, it is handed to you on a silver platter.

If you immediately retort that you could handle this power responsibly, then you need to take a long, hard look in the mirror.

As such, humans that develop magical powers while in Equestria have three choices:

1 – Wear a dampening collar to suppress your powers.

2 – Study under a (untranslatable – Priest?) of the philosophy of Harmony, until such time as you are deemed wise and responsible enough to wield these powers.

3 – Refuse study or suppression, try to hide your powers or run away, and if you are found to have harmed anyone, be prepared to be hunted and possibly put down like a rabid animal to prevent your inevitable downward spiral and transformation into a monster.

It may seem harsh, but the alternative is unacceptable.

This section concludes the introduction to living in Equestria. Consult your local library for any more detailed information you may be curious about.

Play nice, stay safe, and have a wonderful time while you're here.

A Private Conversation

"=Excuse me.="

"Princess Luna?"

I put my pen down and go to kneel. She gestures for me to hold, and I straighten, taking a step closer. That I could act so casually around her always infuriated her guards, but she was a friend, and I hadn't seen her in…

There were no guards. Luna stood alone, stiffly. Even in the most secure areas of Canterlot Castle, a squad or ten of the toughest soldiers around were never more then a few paces away.

"=We understand you are almost finished with your primer for new human arrivals. We wish to examine your progress.="

The Royal Voice. It was a formal visit, then. Damn. I lowered my arms. When was the last chance I'd had to see her? But if she was here on official business, then where was her escort?

"=…It's proceeding apace.="

It took me a moment longer then normal to switch to speaking Earth. The princess was in a royal mood, eyes forward, head up, and carefully enunciating the rough Earth language in a way that made it almost poetic.

"=I'm about to finish the section on magic and-="

"=Then We have arrived at a fortuitous time. There is an…issue…the Royalty wishes to discuss with you.="

The Royalty. Luna slept during the height of the day, so the sisters met and held court in the hours of dawn and dusk that they were both awake. But if there was a problem, why not summon me during that time so that both could speak to me?

Luna's horn glowed softly as she levitated a few pages off the desk to examine. It was an empty, nervous gesture. She'd picked up a few words in our time together, but I knew she couldn't read English.

"=Did something happen? Another new arrival causing trouble in town?="

"=Nothing of that sort. Rather, it is the information you are currently scribing for future human…guests. We wish to ensure that certain information is portrayed…in the proper manner.="

"=I'm…afraid I don't understand what you mean, Princess.="

"=Magic is an extremely powerful force. Dangerous if used incorrectly or unwisely. Of the humans that have been inexplicably transported to Equestria, all have expressed great interest in learning to use it as we do. Most of the humans that come here have tried not to disrupt Harmony, but some…="

Harmony. That concept had been so poorly translated through the TV show. It was more then a few simple words. It was a complex philosophy that Equestrian society was based upon. The Elements of Harmony were ideals that good ponies strove to embody, the closest thing this place had to a religion.

"=…some of them, if they were to learn to use magic…="

"=Would take that power and go from petty trouble-maker to person of mass destruction.=" I finished for her. "=And even some of the good ones, well…Power corrupts, as the saying goes.="

"=Correct. As human arrivals, past and future, will read your work for guidance, We wish to ensure, for as long as possible, that they believe such power to be beyond their reach."

Oh hell.

"=You want a lie to protect Harmony.="

Luna recoiled as if she'd been slapped. She closed her eyes and nodded, slowly, silently. I didn't really understand the nuances of the philosophy, but it must have been a hell of a debate between the once-avatars of Harmony to decide on this.

"=It is a terrible thing to contemplate. And even worse a thing to say. But yes. Too few humans have shown the wisdom to wield such power safely.=" Her voice changed, not merely in tone, but stretched past sound and reached into the flow of magic, power threading into her words and sent forth. "=So for the sake of all that live in Equestria and by the enchanted oaths you swore to Us, Our Knight of Silence, We ask you to do everything in your ability to keep this power from the hands of those that would abuse it.="

The room was quiet for a time. A glyph on my chest, over my heart, began to warm. It soon became a persistent throbbing that made my ribs ache. I went to one knee, and bowed my head.

"=Your knight hears your command, and he obeys…and I agree. It's too dangerous. At least in Equestria, there are Ponies that can fight to stop anyone that might use magic to harm others. If a wizard got back to Earth and proved that magic was not a mere myth…oh, it's going to be a mess. A big, bloody mess in so many ways…="

My Lady Luna bid me rise, and I sat back on the stool and began thinking.

"=I think I can delay the pursuit of it, but not for long.="

"=Why so?="

"=Well, most humans aren't just going to take no for an answer. They'll still try to learn on their own, using any systems they brought with them…or even just making stuff up as they go. Some will try to buy it, or steal it, or run off on a treasure hunt the second they hear about anything that might grant magical powers. And magic is just so…damned easy once you learn the trick to it…="

"=Then how will can you prevent other humans from claiming it?="

Luna frowned and leaned closer as I closed my eyes and bowed my head in thought. Then she rubbed the side of her face against the stubble on my cheek.

"GAH!"

"=I recall seeing Miss Pie doing that often. It is really quite a pleasant sensation.="

"=I still have nightmares about that pony!="

Luna laughed quietly and rested her head on my shoulder. The stiffness was draining from her posture. It was becoming closer to just two friends speaking, now. Idly, I reached up and rested a hand on Luna's neck, rubbing the muscles I found underneath. Being the first human to arrive here had gotten me Royal attention. Being nocturnal like Luna meant I dealt with her far more then with her sister. But after jokingly offering a massage one night, whenever a report was due, I was the one who was requested to deliver it. Now if she would just tone down the volume on the moaning and grunting I wouldn't have those rumors to put up with…

"=If I say something like 'learning magic is expensive' or 'dangerous' then I can get people to react in certain ways. The trick…is figuring out how to present the idea. To push people in the right direction. Or the wrong direction. I can also play up the acts of some of the worse humans that came here and the things they did to try and get it.="

"=At the least, it would not be a lie to say that the reckless use of magic is harmful to oneself and others.="

"=That's right… what if I said that a human managed to succeed in learning magic, but blew himself up in the process, or died in some other horrible way?=

I felt Luna tense up again. She'd once been attuned to the Element of Honesty, and doing this couldn't be pleasant for her.

"=Or maybe, what if I said that only someone dedicated to the ideals of Harmony could learn magic?=

Luna's eyes shot open, and she looked at me in surprise.

"=A half-truth that guides others towards Harmony is…vastly preferable to attempting to build Harmony upon a lie.="

"=Would that be acceptable? Regardless of what I say, someone is going to figure it out sooner or later, even just by accident. Harmony or no Harmony. And once the secret's out…="

"=Then at least by this method We might prepare humans to use their abilities responsibly when the time comes. It is something I know to not to be impossible, after all.=" A smile then, real and warm. "=Continue your work thusly and I shall discuss this new possibility with my sister. We must carefully consider such a path before committing Ourselves to it.="

"=Speaking of Celestia, why wasn't I simply summoned during the dawn or dusk courts? Or did you just not want anyone to overhear?="

"=She…thought that this could be a difficult thing to ask of you, and so she asked that I, as your friend, make the request.="

"=As my friend.="

"=Yes.="

"=…Luna, you know I respect your sister, but she can be a real, manipulative-="

Luna caught the growing tone in my voice and planted a hoof in my side to cut off anything further. And likely spare me the wrath of any pony in earshot.

"=My sister is not manipulative! She…has simply a great deal of experience in the understanding of people. I agreed to her request because I felt it the best way to ensure the good of Equestria, not…="

"Because she manipu-Ow! =Alright, moving on.="

I turned and applied both hands to my work. Luna hummed contentedly as I worked up and down her neck. The primer was almost finished, but my squad had drawn the short straw for the next round of escorting annoying nobles around Canterlot. There were worse ways to get out of it then a royal order to attend the princess for a few nights.

Sorry guys. Duty calls.