The Many Lives Of Octavia Philharmonica

by re- Yamsmos

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random
Length: 621

After countless apologies for ruining the Gala and an unhealthy amount of "free dresses", Rarity sits down and realizes: nopony truly knows who Octavia Philharmonica is, and what she does with her spare time. Wildly curious, she decides to find out.

After countless apologies for ruining the Gala and an unhealthy amount of "free dresses", Rarity sits down and realizes: nopony truly knows who Octavia Philharmonica is, and what she does with her spare time.

Wildly curious, she decides to find out.

Inspired by The Secret Story of Big Macintosh, which itself was inspired by The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-07-21 08:47:29 UTC

(Something Else That's Witty)

You'd be hard pressed to find the up-and-coming seamstress Rarity minding her own business inside such a humdrum establishment as Breezie's, with its noxious aroma of greasy fries and its old jukebox stuttering and juttering its siren song from the far away corner, but if you just so happened to walk into the fast food chain this absolutely dreadful Saturday evening, there she would be, in all her marshmallow glory. She sat by herself, humming a small tune and stirring the sugar in the coffee mug across from her around and around with her magic.

Hunching over her cup like some Godsawful Notre Mane protagonist, Rarity lifted her chin and turned around at the telltale jingle of the front door's bell. A smile crossed her lips as she found Twilight Sparkle, then was replaced by a heavy frown once the alicorn began looking around in a kind of panic, as if she were the Princess herself stumbling into Donut Joe's parlor. Rarity looked to the ceiling for a brief, painstaking second of her life, then looked back down and waved a dainty hoof at her friend. Twilight, shaking her wings to rid herself of the rain that had collected on them, caught Rarity's movements and began to trot over to her table.

"I'm a little surprised you wanted to meet here of all places, Rarity," Twilight said as she rounded the corner and began to file into her seat, "I expected a fancy restaurant, not a fast-food chain."

"Yes, I..." Rarity trailed off, swallowed a lump down her throat, and decided to say something she thought mildly kinder, "I do agree, it seems a tad odd, but it was of the utmost importance and this was the closest place for us to meet."

"What will you two be ordering?"

Rarity could see Twilight turning to her left to speak to the waitress, but she had already gotten her coffee and didn't require any food.

Offers You Can't Refuse

"I heard that she's part of the Canterlot Mafia."

"What?"

Rarity took a step back, her magic levitating the red glasses off her nose and back around her neck. She blinked.

Rainbow Dash, bringing her hindleg back to scratch at her side like some kind of dog, replied, "I said, 'I heard that she's part of the Canterlot Mafia'." Returning to a normal standing position—or as normal as a pony could be while wearing the utmost ridiculous fashion material around them like a colorful straitjacket—the Pegasus puffed her chest out and waited for Rarity to continue.

Rarity, meanwhile, found herself stuttering and barely sputtering out beginning syllables of words she certainly would have loved to try throwing back. Raising her brow, she prodded her cheek with her tongue and asked, "...who in the wide world of Equestria are you talking about, Rainbow Dash?"

Rainbow groaned, turning her head to glare back at Rarity. "Octavia, duuuuh!" She frowned. Rarity's dumbstruck expression refused to change. Rainbow swiveled about once more, now speaking to the line of mirrors in front of her. "Everypony and their mom knows you've been apologizing to her and making her these... dumb dresses for what happened back at the Gala."

Rarity scoffed, "What we did at the Gala was absolutely dreadful and unprofessional. Excuse me for attempting to apologize to the poor mare–"

"Rarity, that Gala was like two years ago! She's probably over it by now!"

"There is not a single number of apologies that exists that could redeem what we did."

"It was Pinkie's fault, not yours. She's the one who screwed with her concert, trying to dance to that dumb Pony Pokey song. You weren't even around that part of the castle."