"Rainbow...,"she said. Again. My adopted sister stood behind me, her wings drooping.
"Look,"I said, turning to face the butter-yellow pegasus." I don't want to do this anymore than you do, but... I could change her. Make her care about me."
"She can't change, Rainbow,"said Fluttershy,"If she cared about you, she would have been there for you. She wouldn't have run away."
"But, still, she's my mom! She ga-"A sharp retort cut my rant short.
"No, Rainbow Dash! She isn't your mom! I've seen so many animals and their mothers! The first thing on their minds is the safety of their child! Not how much money they can make of off child labor! Not crushing their child's wing bones just because of their dreams! Not-"
"I get it, 'Shy,"I said, sounding a lot harsher than I had intended.
For once, though, she wasn't afraid. She didn't cringe, flinch, or wince. She didn't cower and hide. She stood tall and firm, and retorted once again.
"If you get it, then why are you going back to her? Why don't you just leave her alone? She had so many chances to apologize, to admit that she was wrong! If she hasn't apologized in ten years, what makes her so important? Why would you go to her? What has she ever done for you?"
"She's the reason I'm alive!"I yelled, finally snapping. Tears poured down my cheeks."She's the reason the Wonderbolts have me on their team! She's the reason Equestria is still in one piece! She's the reason that Scootaloo has an older sister! She's the reason Tank has a home! She's the reason-"
"Rainbow Dash, all those things are great, but most of that affect others. Not you, others! What has she ever done for you? Barely anything! Why should you have anything to repay to her?"
"My life is not nothing!"I trailed off, staring at my hooves,"My life isn't nothing... Is it?"
I felt a gentle hoof lift my face and wipe away my tears.
"Rainbow Dash,"she said,"Look at me. Don't ever, ever think your life is nothing."
She was crying by this point.
"You are the Element of Loyalty. You have saved the world many times over. You can perform tricks in the air that were thought of as a mare's tale. You are the single fastest pony in Equestria! There are so, so many things you can and have done. Rainbow... never think you're useless, because you aren't. Don't think that you can't, because you can. Don't think you're lost, because you will always be on the right path. And no matter what, don't give up. We are there for you. I am there for you. And we will always be there, ready to catch you when you fall, just like you are for us."
I just stood for a moment, taking in the speech I had heard.
"Whoa, 'Shy. That was deep,"I said when I had fully recovered.
"Oh, thank you,"she said, with a blush on her cheeks.
"I'll keep that in mind,"I promised.
"Are you still going to visit her?"she asked.
"I have to. I promised I'd come,"I said, staring into her serious eyes for a second. Just one second.
"Fine...,"she conceded,"But you have to promise me something."
"Anything,"I said.
"Promise me you'll never go back again. This will be the last time you say goodbye. Promise me."
I walked into Ironshore Prison, off the coast of San Palomino Bay. Nodding to Sharp Blade, the head guard, I walked towards the visitor's area. I had come here so often, once every two weeks, in fact, that the walk was practically second nature. That gave me too much time to mull over Fluttershy's words.
"If she cared about you, she would have been there for you!"
Yeah, right.
"No, Rainbow Dash! She isn't your mom!"
Then who is?
"If she hasn't apologized in ten years, what makes her so important?"
I don't know.
"Promise me you'll never go back again. This will be the last time you say goodbye. Promise me."
Stupid promise. Stupid, damn promise.
I felt like I could scream. Like I could break all of these walls. Like I could kill... her.
I stopped in front of the door. The one thing stopping me from seeing her. Just one push, one step, meant I would see that pegasus who shared my coat and eyes. The one who I got my fierce, impulsive nature from. The one who inspired me to become more loyal and protective to my friends than ever, if only because I didn't want happened to me to happen to them. The one who crushed my dreams with every breath she breathed.
What was there to stop me from hurting her? To break her bones, just like she did to me? To kill her? A glass wall. Nothing more than a glass wall with holes in it. Nothing I couldn't break through. But, I couldn't. I couldn't just kill her.
I drew away from the door in fear. Not of her, but of myself. Of what I could do. I wasn't a murderer, but here I was, thinking of killing my own mother. I was a monster. I should just lock myself away. I was nothing.
Once again, Fluttershy's words flitted through my mind, but this time they were uplifting words.
"You are the Element of Loyalty. You have saved the world many times over. You can perform tricks in the air that were thought of as a mare's tale. You are the single fastest pony in Equestria! There are so, so many things you can and have done. Rainbow... never think you're useless, because you aren't. Don't think that you can't, because you can. Don't think you're lost, because you will always be on the right path. And no matter what, don't give up. We are there for you. I am there for you. And we will always be there, ready to catch you when you fall, just like you are for us."
This time, the speech wasn't so stunning. It was sincere. It was true. And it was exactly what I needed to hear.
I opened the door and stepped into the room.
Author's Note
I know I haven't added chapters to my stories or published new stories lately, so consider this my apology.