It was another day in Ponyville, the sun was shining, the day was new, and Twilight awoke on her bed spread to the sun light glaring at her face. "todays the day!" Twilight Sparkle said excitedly. She went out of bed and looked to search for her prize.
She opened the cabinet and took out all of her belongings from clothes to books and etc. to find it was gone! "what!? were is it were in the world did I put it!?" "oh no oh no oh no what am I gonna do to satisfy myself its gone its gone" she screamed in fetal position. "wait!" she spoke, Ill just get it from Gilda then all my cravings will be satisfied" but then she made a pouty face and said "but if i get caught then ill go to Equestrian jail for all eternity" then she rose and said "whatever its well worth it". She went out of her room to the living room filled with books. "Spike Ill be off to Ponyville for errands okay?" Spike was sorting books as usual. "kay see ya twi imma go get High" and so he did. Twilight was walking allong the road to her destination when suddenly a Pinkie Pie emerged. "hey twi were ya goin were ya goin I was just on my way to the same direction we should walk the same way yay! so howsit!" "not now Pinkie Im busy go bother someone else okay?" "but Twi Im just so bored" "well im busy bug off" "fine Ill go to rarities!" the manic Pony then bounced to Rarities Boutique. "Crazy Freak" said Twilight behind Pinkies back. As Pinkie Pie leaped toward her destination she slowly realized that Twilight was acting suspicious and even called her a Crazy Freak! "there must be something that detective Pinkie Pie can do!" "and so Pinkie Pie donned the Detective attire out of thin air and stalked the very direction Twilight was going but all sneak-sneaky.
Twilight walked all the way to Ponyville downtown were all the shifty types were at to find Gilda. It was a dark street with many hobo ponies littered throughout the sidewalk. She walked to the Nightmare Maroon a bar at the end of downtown ponyville were she took a seat. The bartender who was a very old griffin with a scar across his face was pouring drinks for the other shifty ponies and griffins and when he noticed Twilight Sparkle he walked up to her and said "good evening looking for some Illegal firmware?" "yes Im here to see Gilda!" she said angrily. "woah not with that tone young lady" as he grabbed a bat from the cabinet Twilight instantly reacted and magicly shot a hole through his abdomen. He fell to the ground with blood all over the cieling and floor. "Ill repeat myself" "Where is Gilda!?" she screamed towards everyone in the bar. "Shes right here" said Gilda. She then emerged in silhouette of sexy clothes of red and green and came to Twilight.
"what do you want Twilight?" said Gilda with fear in her voice. "give me another one, Ill pay you cash right now!" said Twilight desperately. Twilight threw money from her saddlebag all over the bar. Everyone desperately grabbed from thier seats the money that she thrown. "alright alright stop ill get it for you! if you just leave please..." "fine Just hurry up!" said Twilight Crazily. Pinkie Pie was sitting near the area were she threw the money and she was flabbergasted and shocked to her core after seeing all this crud and she never believed her own eyes, she was buckin scared. "...Twilight?" she said to herself in disbelief. Pinkie Pie then walked slowly outside of the commotion that was happening in the bar and sat there slumped outside thinking of what to do. Meanwhile back at the bar Twilight just holded someone hostage for not getting the item fast enough. "three he dies, two he dies, one he dies!!" "Wait! here it is sorry heh it took so long" said Gilda out of breath. The bag was shown to hold a candle shaped item inside. Twilight then threw the hostage with magic to a table and grabbed with two hoofs from Gilda the item. "yes Yes! I finnaly have it" then she started to chuckle and laugh as she exited the bar with blood all over herself gratified at the job well done. Then Pinkie Pie emerged in front of her as she exited the bar. "Twilight is that you?" said Pinkie Pie. "augh oh celestia did you see all that?" said Twilight Sparkle."yes and it was all for this? are you bucking serious?" said Pinkie Pie as she holded up the object. "Give that back!" said Twilight Sparkle in anger. "No what you did is insurmountable" "yah and Id do it again" said Twilight Sparkle in evil-joy. "now give it back or else..." as she said this her horn glowed and she magnetically from the bar took Gilda screaming crashing through the window and she landed on the floor outside. Twilight put her hoof on Gilda's neck. "Dont do it Twilight" said Pinkie. "Give" Twilight hired the hoof "it" Twilight held it higher "back!" she hammered it down on Gildas neck but before she could, Pinkie Pie spontaneously kicked her towards a trash can really fast. "are you alright" said Pinkie Pie towards Gilda. "no I feel like im dying" "stay here I got Twi" "Wabam!" Pinkie Pie got hit by a magically torpedoed trash can. Twilight then whent insane speaking in words of different levels of evil and bucking cockroaches and animals swarmed pinkie pie all over. In return Pinkie Pie got a bug-spray out of thin air and killed them with smell! Then Out of insane rage Twilight exploded into a nuclear explosion and as 4th wall breaking pinkie pie ran as she could but she could not outrun the energy swarming all over and everyone died.
All that was left was a dildo, a dildo that Killed many people for a ponies pleasure. Then in the midst of the explosive chaos Pinkie pie and Twilight were making out and bucking like two universes converging on each other and they did that for all eternity.
The End.