It's Always Sunny in Equestria

by Seran

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Crossover, Comedy
Length: 2092

The unfortunate adventures of the mane six when twilight is busy with her new princess duties. This is why Ponyville can't have nice things.

You hear of the tales of twilight and her friends, but what of just her friends? When Twilight is away the mare will play, Right? Unfortunately the five important mares get into troubles that could embarrass her royal status. These are those unfortunate tales.

There is no set schedule as this is a side project. Updates will come spontaneously when I get ideas.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-07-24 18:40:01 UTC

Episode 1

Sugarcube Corner

8:00pm

On a thursday

“That’s the last of it,” Pinkie hopped off the table with a rag in hoof and the wall now cakeless. A smile that could be described as gleeful cut through her cheeks as she felt joyous that the mess had been cleaned.

“I’m sure Mr. cake will be happy to know the party was a success.” Rainbow Hollered with a cheerful whip of her hooves.

“The young ones were such a handful,” Fluttershy collected the wet rags from the table that was now free of drinks and popcorn.

“But maybe next time you should warn us about the clown.

The yellow pegasus shivered in her apron as she thought of the clown’s unnecessary balloon popping. No one had warned them he was inexperienced.

Pinkie, wiping the sweat from her brow looked at her watch. A smile slapped onto her face as she remembered a prior engagement. “And not a moment too soon. My Dance partner is almost here.”

“Dance partner?” Rainbow was confused. “Is this about your night classes at town hall? I thought those were on Saturdays.”

“My partner and I are practicing for our test, were doing the tango.” a bell rings from behind the kitchen doors, alerting pinkie of yet another important thing she had forgotten. “Oop, the granola is done. I’ll go get it, can you two clear the floor.”

“We’re on it.” Rainbow saluted her with a smile as the pink mare skipped into the kitchen.

“I can see why Pinkie is so good at things.” The humble words of the Yellow mare spoke soft and true to her feelings. “I should take some classes some time.”

“Or you can learn on your own through guides and books.” Rainbow chortled her comment past her nose.

The light jingle of the door turned the attention of the two pegasi towards a rare image, a sole Zebrican stallion carefully making his way into the shop.

“Oh,” Fluttershy was the first to speak at the stranger. “Umm, were closed for today?”

“I know,” the zebra continued his motion towards the register.

“Look, we don’t want any trouble,” Rainbow shielded her long time friend from danger. “The register is empty so you can just go”

“Register,” the Zebra grew irritated, slowly pacing towards the two mares “Look, I’m just here to..”

Fluttershy let out a scream that could be heard from the neighboring block. Pinkie trotted out with a concerned look on her face, “what’s all the hullabaloo” one glance at the stallion and she ran up to greet him. “Zeus,” she said with a smile before turning to her two cowering friends, “guys this is my dance partner, Zeus.”

The silence grew thicker as the stallion glared at the two pegasi with eyes filled with contempt. The two pegasi, ashamed of their actions, avoided eye contact as the situation had just gotten worse.

Episode 1

“Pegasi are Racist”

The xenophobic blue pegasus hovered down the road with her farmer friend with saddles full of groceries. Their conversation continues as she explains to her friend what happened the previous night.

“And then he went on explaining that I was a racist.” Rainbow continued to bicker on about the day, “me, I am the most colorful pony here. Just look at my mane. I got more color than that zebra has.”

“I can see why” the orange earth pony rolled her eyes with a sarcastic chord n her throat.

“I mean, I Live in ponyville, the most diverse town in all of equestria. How can I be racist if I live among so many different races.”

“That sounds like justifyin’ to me.”

“What does that mean?” the pegasus pushed her face towards the earth pony.

“What ‘Ah mean is that you may be puttin’ a bit more into this than y’all should be?”

“And what does that mean?”

“It means you are putting so much effort into proving y’all aren’t racist that you are trying to prove something else.”

“Is that a challenge?”

“Sugarcube, y’all think everything is a challenge.” the annoyed tone grew flat as the sarcasm took hold.

“Is that because I am a pegasus, Isn’t it?” Rainbow’s face pressed against that of the farm pony pushing her to the ground.

“No Rainbow, it’s because you take everything’ as a challenge. You’re overly competitive.”

“Oh yeah, I’ll prove to you that I’m not racist, and I’ll do it while being so anti-competitive, that you will have to reward me for doing so.” the hoof raised to the clouds showed the opposite of what she meant.

“If it will make you happy.” The earth pony muttered under her breath.

The Floating pegasus heard the seemingly inaudible grumble. With a pause in the air and a raise of an eyebrow she prepared herself for the onslaught she was about to give her country friend. “Like, your one to talk.” Rainbow scoffed at her. “Your from the country.”

“I beg your pardon,” the tone turned into skeptical annoyance for the moment.

“You have a lot of history of racism in the country. I mean, you probably go to all earth pony gatherings with your cousins in Appleloosa.”

“That is just because there’s little diversity in appleloosa. Pegasi and unicorns don’t venture into the country.” The skepticism disappeared. “It’s like telling y’all that you went to an all pegasus school in cloudsdale. There is no way an earth pony could walk on clouds and that’s just wrong to insinuate it racist for tryin’ to call racism on somethin’ y’all can’t control.

“Yeah, but, I, Uh, well…” the stammering grew as she tried to find a way out of hole she had dug herself into. “Yeah, but what of the pigs, cows, and sheep you keep locked up in your farm.”

“I offer equal opportunity employment for the farm. They are penned when we need to use them, but they are free to go home for any reason. Besides, the pigs, well, they love the farm and I give them a housing opportunity away from their home while they dispose of scraps. They get paid, and I get my services done.”

“I, but, I,” Stammering in the defeat she found in every turn she crossed her hooves showing displeasure in her current circumstances. “I’m not racist, I just have to prove it.” she muttered to herself while trying to think of a way to do so.

“Whatever floats your boat, sugarcube.” Applejack stepped up and continued onward. “I got to prepare a pie for the new ponies.”

“Mind if I tag along?”

“Sure, just don’t make a mess of things. I gotta make sure they feel welcome.”

“What’s the worst that can happen.?” Rainbow followed the mare back to the farm.

Two hours later the two arrive to a house near town hall, a quiet neighborhood with many beautiful homes. This one still had some decorations to be done, but that was what was expected from a new neighbor. The door opened to the sight of a mono chromic stallion and his mono-chromic wife standing behind him. One glance between the blue pegasus and the Zebra and the smiled fell from both their faces.

“What is she doing here?” The zebra asked with contempt.

With an awkward chuckle and a feigned smile Applejack turned slowly towards Rainbow dash. “You never told me it was Zeus you upset.” she harshly whispered,

“How many zebras do you know of?” She whispered back.

Turning back around to the zebra she smiled and handed them the basket with the pie. “I brought you that pie like I promised. Could we come in?”

Zeus looked at the pie and glared back at Rainbow as he opened the door wider. “Come on in, we already have your friend here.”

They stepped in to find Rarity already sitting, conversing with the wife and child of Zeus, with some dresses and hats ready to share styles.

“This is a mighty fine house, you fellas have.” Applejack complimented on the decorations.

“Weird” The awkward started. “I thought you guys would live in a hut,”

“Rainbow!” Applejack tried to remedy the situation by scolding the pegasus.

“I-I-I mean Zecora has a nice hut for being in the Everfree forest out of town. You ponies sure know how to decorate your huts….” The embarrassed chuckle stopped as quickly as it started as she realized all the eyes in the room were focused on her neck.

“Well, I, Uhh, this is a lovely Manehatten snow globe.” Applejack tried to change the subject by pointing out the decorations.

“Yes, we bought it before we left Manehatten. Which is where we lived, for twenty years, before moving to a less crowded. So we came to ponyville.” Zeus’s explanation focused on the pegasus with much contempt.

“You lived in Manehatten? Applejack attempted to push the conversation along. “I lived there for a year, I have family there, which area did you live in.”

“South Oxen.”

“What did you do there?”

“I was an instructor in the arts.”

Rainbow opened her mouth again. “Oh so you do tribal Zebbrikan Art?”

The silence did its best to suffocate the hoof-mouthed pegasus.

“No,” Zeus grew angrier. “I taught modern cubism, and a little of ceramics.” Throwing his face at the the snout of the pegasus he angrily replied. “I was not born in Zebrika, I Never set foot in Zebrika. And if you have a problem with that then maybe you should just leave?”

Distraught of the situation Rainbow looked around at the peeved yet shocked faces of the ponies around her. Some were more angry and disappointed than shocked, BTU she new what she had to do. Faster than a pin could drop the mare left in a blur. The crowd was left in the ugly stink of the leftover ignorance of the pegasus.

Rarity raced into her bag with some magic and pulled out a small book. “Now then,” she cleared her throat, “I have this book that could explain the situation, though I feel now is the perfect time to explain it.”

The book  titled, Meeting Your New Neighbors, floated over the coffee table, opening to a page titled, Pegasi.

“This is a book we were given in school here in ponyville to help calm the xenophobia that some may get from seeing so many diverse groups coming to Ponyville. Applejack and I were in the same class so she knows what it says.” Rarity explained.

The young zebra huddled up against the white unicorn looking at the book wide eyed and curious. The mother inspected the book reviewing its green over with the flags from the races embossed in silver beveled into the cover.

“I heard of this book. It wasn't in my school in Manehatten when I went there eight years ago” The mother commented.

“This is an old edition from six years ago,” Rarity explained, “this was made exclusively for the Ponyville and Canterlot area since it covers the Everfree forest and other areas around it. But I’m sure now there are other regional books in Manehatten, Crystal empire, and other areas by now.”

Zeus opened his mind to this book, but he was still skeptical on its message. Walking away from the spot of shameful display the pegasus ran away from he headed on over to the couch and pressed his neck over. his wife’s back rest.

Looking down at the book she turned to the right section and began to read, “now then, ‘Your pegasus neighbors can come from all forms of areas around equestria, but not all of them are welcoming. Unlike Unicorns and Earth ponies, who tend to walk on land, pegasi live in the most exclusive areas, clouds and floating islands, where land ponies can not walk. This creates a lack in diversity among the cities and with less diversity a sense of superiority, bigotry, and ignorance can manifest. When they move to more diverse areas they bring along those feelings and distrust towards the other races they meet.”

“Rainbow and Fluttershy are from Cloudsdale. Very little interaction with other races there.” Applejack added to the conversation.

“So it was not her, it’s just her ignorance?” The zebra mare grew to understand.

“Exactly,” Applejack bounced her head in joy as she realized the zebras finally got it. “It’s not her fault she was raised by a bunch of misinformed feather-eaters.”

The crowd stared at her aghast as the mare covered her mouth, uttering a simple “crap” as she realized what she had done.