Change

Curse Mi Amore Cadenza; curse her with all the fury of the hellfires of Tartarus. But more importantly, curse the princesses little hound dog, Twilight Sparkle.

I laid on the rough ground, green blood coming down my brow, obscuring my view. I didn’t bother to open my eyes, the pain in my head telling me that it was best that I just lay here and rot. Give the rest of my feeble life up, and decompose like the washed up whale I was. At this point, I was considering whether or not that my death would be a good or a bad thing for my children -- my pained and hurt children.

Finding some sort of strength in my frail body, I opened my eyes and craned my neck upwards. Getting a look around me, so that I may see what was left of my offspring. I felt phlegm well up in my throat, a reflex at the sight I saw around me. The changeling race looked more like a bowl of potato salad, their bits and pieces mixed about in grotesque splatters of blood and guts. I somehow managed to keep my stomach from spilling its contents -- as little as they may be.

The changelings that did survive the blast from Canterlot, currently looked over their fallen brethren. They let out a few tears, lowering their heads in respect. You could see the distraught in their features, they wore it like a badge of shame --  shame for what I brought upon them. What my failed actions did to them.

I’ve… I’ve failed you, my children...

I couldn’t look at that anymore, no one with any amount of empathy could. I was their mother, their caregiver, and their guardian. Yet I let them down in the most dire time of need. We were starving, desperate, I had no other choice but to take drastic actions. Maybe I should have thought it through some more, gave it more thought before barging in on the most secure city in the world.

No, don’t think like that, Chrysalis. Your mind was in the right, and that’s what counts, right? No, don’t doublethink yourself, you were reckless, and because of that you let the changelings perish in a one last ditch effort to save them.

“Uuugh,” I moaned out in both pain and anguish. The ennui in my soul bursting at the seams of my being.

I rubbed my temples with my forehooves, trying to collect my broken thoughts. The train of contemplation I once boarded, throwing me off into a lake of uncertainty. I just didn’t know what to do anymore; my whole world was more than turned upside down, it was disemboweled, and skinned. Only then did the butcher turn me upside down, letting the green ooze of my life drain away from me.

I passed out from peer exhaustion at that point, my mind in a constant state of turmoil. I wish my dreams were faring better than the rest of my body, but instead I was greeted with nightmares, probably brought about by Princess Luna’s cursed magic.

I saw my kingdom in my dream, the cheers for our raid of Canterlot coming to a close. I actually felt good about myself, and my subjects. In my head, my brain showed me that I was successful in my plan, and that my race now flourished. That was, until they started to melt before me, screaming out in pained gasps of surprise.

I felt their cries go throughout the hivemind. “Help us!” They screamed. “Why didn’t you protect us, mother?”

I felt my breath catch in my throat, unable to utter a single word for what I saw. I looked away, unable to bare gazing at their damaged faces any longer.

“It’s all your fault…” Was the last thing my children said to me before I awoke from my slumber.

Opening my eyes in a shocked panic -- a cold sweat dripping from my body -- I looked around to see if my children were faring better than I. To my surprise, I was surrounded by my subjects, the remainder of us huddled together to get as much warmth from our bodies as possible. I couldn’t help but have the faintest of smiles on my face, kissing the forehead of the changeling directly in front of me.

“It’s.. okay, mommy’s here for you. We’ll make it through this, I promise.” I indeed hoped my promise was not misplaced, even if I was uncertain about it myself.

The changeling in front of me stirred in their sleep, opening their eyes and looking up at me. It was then, that their voice ringed in my head, the changeling speaking telepathically through the hive mind. “My queen?” He asked me with a saddened expression.

“Yes, my child?” “I answered, waiting in patience for a reply.

“I’m so… hungry. Are… are we going to find food, or… or-” I cut him off right there.

As I hugged him close to me, I spoke sincerely, “Please… please keep calm, my child.” I departed from my embrace, my hooves on his shoulders. “We’ll make it through this, we always do.” I could see the doubt in his eyes; his hope was failing.

Seeing that; seeing that complete distraught in my precious child's eyes, it made me scream internally. Cursing everything, and everyone, especially myself. I couldn’t stand for this, I couldn’t just wait to watch my lifeblood die in front of me, slowly growing weaker and weaker until they croaked out their final breaths.

I stood up from the spot that I laid at, rising above the pile of changelings that surrounded me. As I channeled the weak magic that I currently had in my horn, I sent a transmission to the entirety of the changeling race. This in turn, had an effect on the changelings around me, waking them from their slumber. As they groaned in discomfort, their bodies pale even with their pitch-black chitain, they looked upon me as if I was a failed leader who deserved to be burned at the stake.

I flinched before speaking. “Listen, my subjects, my family and my children, for I have an important message to tell you all.” I waited a moment before continuing. “It is true that we are in a dire need of food, as you can already tell. We are broken, our plan failed, and a good majority of us are now… deceased.”

I looked down to the ground, a couple of tears falling down my face. If that wasn't enough, I felt a quick jolt on the top of my head caused by a small drop of water. Looking up, I could see the monstrous rain clouds above me. Knowing that I needed to make this speech go by quickly in order to prevent us from dying from hypothermia, I continued.

“But, there may be a chance for us yet, but it’s going to be a difficult road.” Taking a deep breath so that I may finish what I started, I said, “We need to find a different way to go about finding food, and I propose that we try to find allies in this bleak world of ours. Alone by ourselves,” I pointed to the dead changelings that littered the ground around us, “We will die.”

I let my last word hang in the air, letting it soak into the brains of my children, like the torrents of rain that now poured down upon us. There was tension in the air, I knew that my subjects were gonna take this with a grain of salt. I just knew I was asking too much for them, but to my surprise, they seemed to nod their heads in unision. Sending waves of agreement though the hivemind.

“You… you think that this will be a good change, you think that this may work out in the long run?” I asked, baffled by their answer. I thought for sure they would be against my plan for our future.

It was almost like some sort of magic, but they all managed to say to me at once. “It’s the only option we have left.”

Although they were bruised and battered, some of them missing good chunks of their chitian, they still found some sort of drive to push them forward. It was almost too much for me, after seeing the bloody remains of my race, I thought for sure it would be the end of us, but to my surprise, there seems to be hope yet. It was too much for me, I found more tears coming down my face, I felt myself falling into the ground from the feelings that welled up inside me.

Usually, changelings have a good hold of their emotions, but today was different. I just couldn’t keep them inside me any longer. As I lay there crying my worn heart out, I felt a sensation creep across my entire body. Stopping my torrent of tears for a moment, I looked around me. To an even more surprise, I found the changelings who were once before me, now huddled around me again like we were before. Some of them shedding tears of their own.

I stuttered before saying, “Thank you… thank you so much, my children.” As I regained control of myself, I left their embrace, looking upon them once more. “Let’s go find some shelter, then we could have a proper rest for tomorrow,” I paused for effect. “Then we’ll find us some proper food to live on.”

For the first time since we’ve been blasted from the castle of Canterlot, you could see smiles upon my children's faces. In turn, this brought a smile to my face, for I knew that I had the entirety of the changeling race behind me, ready to pick me up, if I was ever to fall again.