Bottomless Party

The following day, Saturday, was, like, 90% prep work. I mean, I slept until 1 PM, but coordinating my plans between Twilight, the stallions, and everyone else I needed – that took all afternoon. I didn't get into Canterlot Station until the sun was dipping below the horizon, a little bit after 7 in the evening.

I had eaten an early dinner, cleaned up, and hopped on the train alone (more or less) with little more than the clothes on my back: A bikini top, an optional coat in case the mountain air got a bit chilly, bell-bottoms, and sandals (a combination that had annoyed Rarity to no end, now that I'd figured out how to talk past her drive for fashion). Hanging from a belt loop by its drawstring was a small velvet bag, which was actually a genuine Bag of Holding that Twilight had enchanted at my request. It held everything I needed for my confrontation with Celestia.

As I walked through the lobby and out into the grand plaza beyond the train station, fantasizing about the many ways I was going to bring that Princess bitch low, I got a moment to appreciate the last bits of golden sunset light reflecting off the ornate Canterlot buildings. Sex toys these ponies may be, but some of them clearly knew their architecture and construction. You had to admit that.

I was so caught up in the sights that I didn't notice the squadron of Royal Guards until one of them yelled, "Halt, human!"

With a groan, I lowered my gaze to no less than nine guards armed with spears – four white pegasus stallions, four gray unicorn stallions, and one decorated pegasus mare in the center leading them all.

Instantly 100% annoyed, I just tersely said, "Let. Me. Pass."

"By Celestia's command, I cannot do that," said the central mare, holding up a flat hand to me in a 'stop' gesture. "We are here to keep you in protective custody until Her Highness is ready for you."

I'd been scheming all day, so my brain was already in overdrive to process this. That had been an outright 'no,' despite the direct use of my power. And I had to roll my eyes at that 'protective custody' thing – it was obviously Celestia trying to run out the clock, waiting for this Normal thing to take me over and turn me into the most boring pony mare in the universe. Not that I was worried. Sure, I'd felt a couple of weird tingles here and there, but I'd been fucking (and fucking with) ponies all day in all kinds of ways. If the power wanted me force me into line, it was gonna have to try a whole lot harder. Still, I couldn't really afford to waste time doing nothing, could I now? I didn't want to be late for my very important date.

"You there," I barked, pointing at the commander mare. "It's very important that you tell me your name and let me see your cutie mark."

The mare blinked hard, a little taken aback by this request, but the power did its work. Her hands went to her waist to undo the straps of her decorative armored skirt, and she said, "Lieutenant Bishop of the Royal Guard... madam."

The other eight male guards tried so very hard not to stare as that skirt dropped to the ground. I could see a little blush on the pegasus mare's face as she turned around and, after a moment's hesitation, lowered her leggings and underwear just enough to let me see one of her butt stamps. It was a chess bishop in front of wavy sun.

Of course it was a bishop guarding a sun. What else it would be? How else could someone resist my power except through the impeachable destiny of their own cutie mark? That was the cause of Rarity's passion for fashion, too, and why I went to that bottomless party in a fucking schoolgirl pinafore. But Rarity was also the reason I knew this could be worked around – you just had to say the right things. Except... convincing a dressmaker to make what I want rather than what she wanted; that had to be a LOT easier than convincing a soldier to ignore her orders given by the very person who gives her purpose in life.

I scowled and put my fists on my hips. This was a fine mess I'd gotten myself into. "Alright, say I come along peacefully," I said, stalling for time. "What are your orders? Where will you be keeping me?"

Bishop gratefully lifted up her pants and reached for her armored skirt. "First off, if you don't–"

"Ah ah ah!" I cut in. A plan was germinating in my mind. A naughty plan. "It would make me feel more comfortable if you kept that heavy armor off for now. It's not like I'm armed, or have any magic spells."

There was a solid five seconds where this command worked through Lieutenant Bishop's brain. I wondered how far my commands still went as long as they didn't contradict her orders. And sure enough, Bishop stepped out of her skirt and started undoing the pieces holding her breastplate together as well. The flattening effect of the heavy armor was undone, revealing that the uptight mare actually possessed what had to be a pair of fucking G-cup jugs under a padded jacket. The eyes of the stallions behind her went wide, and some of them struggled not to chortle at the sight of their superior officer stripping.

"First off," Bishop muttered, trying to stay professional despite all this, "if you don't come peacefully, we are more than prepared to take you by force. The Princess doesn't want you brought to physical harm, but–"

I put up a hand. "Just a sec." There was plenty of distance between me and the group of guards, even though they were blocking my way into the city, but I still made a show of leaning to one side so I could talk to the eight stallion guards. "Hey, the rest of you! It is totally okay if, when I ask you to stand down and let me pass, you just do that! Celestia's wrong for trying to imprison me or stop me, and that makes it okay for you to do what I say and not her." As I swayed back to a standing position, I decided to go for it and say, "That goes for you too, Bishop," even though I figured it wouldn't work.

It was kinda funny to see eight serious-looking armored guards looking amongst themselves like they had question marks popping out of their heads. They didn't move, but a lot of them relaxed their stances and lowered their spears. I had a feeling I'd just taken them out of play.

Bishop, however, just narrowed her eyes. "The subtleties may be lost on you, human, but Celestia has been leading Equestria for over a thousand years. Her orders come with the weight and wisdom of a millennium of–!"

"Yeah yeah yeah, you're a fucking Celestia cultist, I get it," I snapped.

"STOP interrupting me!" Bishop yelled. An instant later, she remembered her sense of propriety. She cleared her throat, and tried to control her breathing, which had become momentarily rapid due to her rage and frustration.

I got the sense I couldn't just push random buttons with her until one of them worked; she'd just get more and more mad at me until she wouldn't listen to anything I said, even if it would otherwise be the correct new Normal. So whatever I ended up doing, it would have to be precise and decisive. I couldn't afford to fuck around.

Well, I couldn't afford to fuck around as much. With this power, there was a guaranteed non-zero amount of fucking around.

The pegasus commander finally regained control of herself. "We are going to take you to the castle," she said in a careful, measured tone. "We are going to keep you in protective custody. And then, when Celestia is ready, we will take you to her. That is all."

"Mmhmm. Yeah, see, I can't do that," I replied, folding my arms. "Celestia's trying to kill me. By waiting me out. And keeping me by myself for a few hours is how she's going to let that happen."

Bishop got the most incredulous look on her face. "What...?!" She couldn't even fathom what I was saying.

"At the very least," I continued, "you should let me have a gangbang with those other eight guards you have there." I gave the rest of her squad – which were all pretty hunky, not gonna lie – a cute little wave. One of them, a unicorn; his eyes just lit up at that. That sounded like something that would make his day, apparently. "Y'know, to pass the time!" I said.

Now Bishop was really confused, which was honestly just fun for me at this point. "Ummmm..." She shook her head. "No, you are specifically to be kept... alone..." I could tell by the inflection in her voice that, despite the whole 'She's asking for a gangbang?' thing, part of what I'd said was starting to get through. Why would Celestia specifically order that? she was probably asking herself. Sure, it might be standard procedure for a potentially dangerous prisoner, but is there a chance this human is telling the truth?

I decided to push the advantage. "Well, there you go. And I bet she wants you to take away any items I got, just so I don't have anything to play with," I added, patting the tiny Bag of Holding at my waist.

Bishop rallied some of her eroded confidence. "Standard procedure." I'd bet she was telling herself that more than she was telling me.

Something occurred to me just then. "She didn't actually tell you much about me, did she?" I asked her, then leaned to the side again. "And you guys – she's the only one who got even slightly briefed, isn't she? The rest of you are just following her lead." The defensive and bewildered looks on their collective faces was all I needed. "So that's fucked up, isn't it? That's more than a little shady. Don't you think if she were in her right mind, if this were all on the up-and-up, she'd be a little more forthcoming? Maybe something's wrong with all of this, and you're all making a huge mistake!"

Just as the stallions started muttering amongst themselves, Bishop slammed the butt of her spear onto the cobblestone, creating a loud echoing crack throughout the plaza that silenced everyone. A few tense moments passed. Ponies who were just passing through the train station had even stopped and were watching carefully.

"Is that your plan?" she said, glowering. "To convince us to stand down? Human..." She lowered her spear to point at me, the weapon trembling a little in the intensity of her grip. "Celestia has done more for me than you could ever know. I trust her with my life and more. I will not betray her just because of a single moment of doubt! Cease your prattling and surrender, peacefully!"

Fffffffffuck.

I'd just hit a brick wall. There was no way this chick was gonna let me talk my way through now. And I had a few tricks up my sleeve, sure, but I wasn't exactly a physical powerhouse. If this became a fight, I wouldn't last more than a minute. ...Well, a straight fight, anyway.

"Alright alright," I said, and I started cracking my knuckles because it was time to get serious. "So you know something's wrong with Celestia and this whole situation, but you still want to defend and honor her and all that. And you know what? I respect that. That's your life, girl. So let's say I challenge you to a particular kind of duel."

"E-Excuse me?" Bishop sputtered, a tinge of bemusement in her voice.

I didn't lose a shred of confidence. "If I win," I said, "you let me pass. You'll have defended your Princess in... mostly honorable combat, and your cutie mark will be satisfied. If I lose..." I paused. I didn't want to say 'I will come peacefully,' because there was still no way I was going to do that. There was too damn much at stake. "...well, then I guess we go back to doing things your way. The hard way."

The uptight mare's eyes widened and narrowed several times as her mind struggled to both fight against and conform to this line of reasoning. "You'll... You'll just set the terms of this 'duel' in your favor."

"Duhh," I replied, and laughed. "I mean, let's face facts: I'm a lazy city girl from another world who's still shellshocked from losing everything and everyone I've ever known." My face went hard for a few seconds, then I brightened up again. "You, on the other hand, are a trained, dedicated, and probably decorated military officer! If anything, any terms I set will just level the playing field."

I really enjoyed how Bishop seemed to struggle with that logic. Maybe this power wasn't always 100% effective, but it did allow me to sell whatever line of bullshit I could think of as long as it sounded like it made sense. I was certainly having fun with it.

After a long moment, the mare gave me an interrogatory look. "Do you really believe your cause is just? So much that you will fight for it?"

A grin spread across my face. From the tone in her voice, I knew I had her where I wanted her. All her brain needed to justify this was to think that I was just as passionate as her. And with my life on the line, I was. So I stepped forward and proudly said, "You bet your ass."

Bishop let out of a huff. "Fine." She gestured back at the other stallions with her spear, and they stepped back to give their superior officer room. When we had plenty of room for an arena, she stared hard at me and said, "What are your terms?"

"First: To humiliation," I declared, hands on my hips. "The first pony– er, being, to be so ashamed they can't take it anymore is the loser."

The pegasus mare's eyebrows raised dramatically, and then she visibly steeled herself. But, noticeably, she allowed herself a small smirk. No way a trained soldier like herself was going to ever admit defeat to someone like me, she probably thought. She probably got hazed worse in boot camp!

Ooh, that just makes me imagine magical pony boot camp. Bunch of hardened stallions and mares sweaty from training...

Focus, girl, focus. I reached for the velvet Bag of Holding at my waist. "And second..." I continued, "our only tools will be these."

I stuck my hand and most of my forearm into the pouch, going further beyond what was outwardly physically possible. I'd messed around with this thing a few times on the train, just to kind of practice, and it was kind of fiddly. Inside was a practically infinite, structureless space, and all I could do was reach and grasp around for what I was looking for. But Twilight had said that the key was mentally focusing on what you wanted to pull out, and eventually you'd find it...

My hand found a cool, thick, springy cylinder, and I knew I'd found my target.

Before my captive audience's very eyes, I pulled a massive red horsecock, pulsing and flaccid, out of the bag. The sheer girth of it temporarily stretched the opening of the pouch, especially the two juicy soccer-ball testicles. The cock wasn't attached to anything or anybody, save for a small stick-like handle with a cloth separating it from the dick. I hefted the drooling meat onto my shoulder and grinned.

"What– is–" Bishop sputtered, completely red in the face now. "...Do you mean to fight with dildos as if they were swords?!"

"Oh, these aren't dildos," I assured her, and gave the red slab of cock a pat and a loving stroke. It throbbed against my shoulder.

Several of the stallion guards winced – one of them reflexively reached for their own armored crotch-pouch. Lieutenant Bishop's face hardened into a horrified glare. "What have you done to those stallions...?!"

I rolled my eyes. "Fuckin' calm down, they're fine." With a mighty heft, I lifted the cock off my shoulder and let it fall into the grip of my other hand. As I held it and stroked it, I said, "They're connected by portals. Big Macintosh is doing his thing back in Ponyville, and he's given me permission to use his dick here however I see fit. If he really seriously objects, or desperately needs his dick back for some reason, he can always pull it out of his magical boxers. Geez."

There were a couple of audible sighs of relief, which offended me. Did they seriously think that I was such a deviant monster that I would mutilate and reanimate a three-foot horsecock for my own amusement?? The nerve! Clearly I would just command Princess Twilight and her friend Rarity to rush-order several pairs of portal underwear, and make sure my stallion victims loved the idea. I wasn't a psycho here!

Annoyed, I lifted the cock back onto my shoulder and reached into the Bag of Holding again, and in short order retrieved another living, disembodied horsecock – this one longer, thinner, and yellower. You guessed it; it was Mr. Cake's. "Here, catch!"

We weren't standing that far apart; she could've caught it fairly easily. But her hands froze halfway through the instinctive catching motion, and instead the flopping cum-hose bounced off her legs and fell at her stunned feet with a meaty 'slap-fwap.' I frowned a little; as tough as stallion sacks were, Mr. Cake back in Ponyville had probably winced at his balls getting smooshed against the cobblestone.

Bishop looked down, stupefied, at the stud pole beneath her, then up at me.

"Those are my terms," I said simply, with a smirk.

With an almost shaking hand, Bishop reached down and gripped the handle beneath the disembodied horsecock. It flopped around as she tried to lift it to a ready stance, and she seemed afraid to try and stabilize it with her other hand. A great red blush colored her white pegasus face as her eyes remained transfixed on, well, probably one of the few penises she'd ever seen up-close. Poor girl.

My pity was short-lived. I dashed forward, winding up Big Mac's cock. "3-2-1-GO!"

Before she had any time to react - WHAP! The great red flare swiped across her cheek, sending her stumbling to the side. I burst out laughing and raised my 'weapon' straight up, then stepped forward and swung down with all my might. The meatiest part of the shaft struck Bishop on the back of her head, and she stumbled to the ground. I just laughed even harder – this was the most absurd thing I'd ever seen, done, or even imagined!

Then my legs were swept out from under me by something warm and floppy, and I landed painfully on my rear end. It seemed Bishop had gotten over her embarrassment. I rolled away and onto my feet before she could follow up, but she was so fast that all I could do was raise Mac's cock in defense to block her strike.

The two pastel-colored cocks clashed, getting almost entangled as they flopped over each other. Bishop, grimacing hard, pushed Mr. Cake's dick harder against me, grinding them together until they were pressed base-to-base, ballsack-to-ballsack.

"Welp, they're gay now," I quipped with a giggle.

Bishop let out a strangled howl of frustration and kicked me hard in my bare stomach, sending me sprawling backwards. I was dazed for a few seconds, and I was pretty sure that was going to bruise later. "H-Hey!" I choked out, trying to sit up while my eyes filled with stars. "That's... ack, that's cheating! You're supposed to use... cocks only!"

"Maybe you should have been clearer about your terms, then," Bishop muttered humorlessly, twirling Mr. Cake's handle in her hand like it was an especially long, springy sword. Looked like she was getting used to handling it, ignoring how weird this was. That was a bad sign.

My pain fueled a new batch of rage and determination. This pegasus guard bitch may have been stronger, but I had one advantage she could never hope to catch up with:

I was shameless.

I put up a hand and clutched my stomach with the other, playing up my pain. "I need a minute. That's your penalty."

Her resistance was evident on her face, but a few seconds later she relented. "Fine. But only a minute."

Immediately, I got to work. I scooped up Big Mac's dick and cradled it against my body, making out with the flare and stroking the shaft and balls. I was rewarded with a spurt of apple-flavored precum, which was like life-giving nectar right now. I almost forgot the pain in my abdomen.

"W-What are you doing?!" Bishop asked bewilderedly.

But I completely ignored her. "C'mon, Mac..." I whispered into that deep red flesh as I licked and stroked and rubbed. "I know you can do it, you stud... Get hard for me..."

There's no feeling, on Earth or anywhere in the universe, like feeling a three-foot horsecock harden against your body. Big Mac's stallionhood pulsed from my knees to my head, leaking sticky precum against my cheek. It telescoped just a little bit higher, thickened a great deal wider, and the flare crowned out to a menacing girth. The heat radiating off it got stronger and hotter, the balls at the base got slicker and sweatier. The combined sensations made my inner thighs squirm and get moist. Oh yeah, I was going to need some alone time after this was over.

But first things first. I stood up, with my 'reforged' weapon in hand. It was weightier and more unwieldy, but its strength was undeniable to anyone looking at it. Especially compared to the cock in Bishop's hand, which was still as limp as a wet noodle.

"I think my minute is up," I declared.

Bishop stared wide-eyed at me, then uncertainly at her own 'weapon.' It was obvious to her what her disadvantage was now. But would she be able to do what was necessary to even the odds? I already knew the answer.

I took advantage of her hesitation and attempted a short swing at her, which she nimbly dodged. She tried countering with a swing of Mr. Cake's soft horsecock, but it bounced harmlessly off Big Mac's hardness. She tried again with a feint and then a swipe at my legs, but I was ready this time. Even against my unprotected body, Mr. Cake's cockslap was just that – a firm slap. Nothing to worry about.

"Is that all?" I taunted, then jabbed when her guard was open. Big Macintosh's flare caught her in the stomach, scraping against the bottoms of her boobs, and the sheer hardness of it forced her back and seemed to almost knock the wind out of her. I pulled back and swung across her chest, slapping those jacket-covered G-cups of hers with Big Mac's flare. Bishop looked shocked by the indignity of it all; she didn't even try to defend herself as I swung with all of my might at her face for another classic bitch-cockslap.

POW! Bishop went down, completely sprawled across the plaza. Mr. Cake's stallionhood bounced out of her hand.

But I wasn't done. I lifted Big Mac's cock over my head, dangling those soccer-ball-sized testes over my head and angling the flare down at Bishop's body. I poured every ounce of love I could through my lips, worshipping Mac's glorious, sweaty balls from below, while my forward hand stroked along the sensitive underside, paying special attention to the medial ring. Precum pumped out in a dribble, then a stream, then in spurts that came ever closer to Bishop's prone form.

Then Bic Mac's cock rumbled and tensed up above my head. I actually had to brace myself as Big Mac started to cum – the sheer force of it pushed me back and threatened my balance.

The first strand hit its mark, crossing across Bishop's pegasus wings. Realizing what was happening, Bishop shakily held her body tight in a fetal position to protect her body, legs and wings drawn in tight and arms covering her head. Shame; that just made it easier for me to completely cover her in cum.

Almost a full minute went by as Big Mac came. All I did was gently aim it around so that every inch I could see of her was covered in hot, white pony-semen. By the end of it, there were only a couple of square inches that weren't completely glazed.

Just as Big Mac's spurts were starting to calm down, I heard, "Stop, STOP! I yield! I yie-he-hield...!"

So I shrugged and flipped Big Mac's cock back upwards. The final spurts of cum shot straight into the air, splattering at my feet. I gently stroked the shaft, teasing out a few more dribbles from the slit that ran down onto my fingers. I sucked my hand clean, saying, "Mmmph, you did good Mac. You earned a break."

I looked around – we'd drawn a sizable crowd during all this. A few ponies were clapping in applause at my victory, not understanding what was really going on other than that a contest had just finished. The stallion guards were awkwardly silent, not sure how to respond to their commander getting publicly humiliated by a perfectly normal human girl.

"Well!" I slung Big Mac's softening prick over my shoulder. "That'll do it. If you gentlecolts will excuse me..." I walked across the cum-stained ground, not caring if my sandals got stained. The eight stallions parted to give me access as I approached – after all, I'd said earlier that it was okay to let me through when I asked, hadn't I?

But just as I was about to leave Bishop and her useless goons behind me, I heard sobbing. "I'm sorry, Princess... I'm so-ho-ho-horry...!"

I scoffed, rolled my eyes, and turned back towards the shamed lieutenant. "C'mon, bitch, it's not that..."

My words died in my throat. A faint magical glow was passing over Bishop's body. The bits of exposed skin I could see were turning from white to... a soft gray.

"The fuck??"

There was a flash of light right next to my face, and suddenly I could feel a hoof and a claw settled on my non-cock-occupied shoulder, and a different type of claw resting against my cheek. "Come now, Isabel. Surely you didn't expect to completely undermine her cutie mark destiny and not have it severely affect her mental state?"

"I– What– You–!"

"But what does it matter?" I could practically hear the grin on his face. "You're a villainess now. She was just in the way."

"Would you SHUT UP for a second?!"

The tiny draconequus on my shoulder pouted and folded his arms. "Fine... mistress," he muttered, snarling out the last word like it was acid in his mouth. Discord snapped his fingers and disappeared.

The ponies around me looked very concerned all of a sudden, so I looked around and said, "It's okay, it's okay, he's with me until..." I was going to say 'until I'm free of the Normal resurgence, as per our agreement', but they didn't need to know that. "...whatever."

I sighed and walked up to Bishop's cum-covered fetal position on the ground. She was still sniffling a bit. Wow, I'd really done a number on her. Couldn't help but feel a little bad.

Kneeling down until I was balancing on my toes, I said, "Look... it's... actually a good thing that you threw this fight."

"H-Huh?" Bishop blubbered up at me.

I restrained another sigh. Time for some high-speed bullshit. "Yeah, you... threw this fight intentionally. Not, like, consciously intentionally, but subconsciously, unconsciously, you knew that letting me talk to Celestia is the right thing to do."

"Wha...?" Geez, she was like a little child in this state.

"You had to have seen it," I continued. "How scared she was. How much pain she's in. All because, what, I want to talk to her? She's irrationally afraid, lieutenant. All this stuff about humans has seriously affected her. And me?" I put a hand on my chest innocently. "I just want to help her get over it. To help her confront her fears and get over them. That's a good cause, right?"

"Th-Then why didn't you say so...?"

I rolled my eyes. "Because nine armed guards came to basically indirectly kill me at Celestia's command. I was a little pissed off. But look." I reached down to her cum-stained chin, and she winced. "Look, girl. It's just shitty that you had to come between us. It doesn't– This battle doesn't actually mean anything about your loyalty or your destiny. It's just... a porn-y chapter of your life, and I promise, after today, I'll never ask you to do that again. The Princess isn't going anywhere; you'll have plenty of chances to prove yourself. After I talk with her, she won't even be mad at you."

Unlike every moment up to this point, my words went into her vulnerable mind easily. After a second or two, she nodded shakily. A little bit of brightness returned to her skin. Not all the way back to white, but maybe the rest was a job for an actual real therapist.

"Close enough," I muttered, and stood back up. "Hey, uh... Maybe this is an opportunity!" I presented Big Mac's cock before her. "You've just been introduced to a new form of combat. Maybe you can get ahead of the curve and, uh, take your stallions here, and... practice... the art of... cockfighting!" My storage tank of bullshit was starting to run out, if you couldn't tell.

"...Okay." Slowly, Bishop got up off the ground. She wiped a glob of cum off her face and glared at me. "...Help her, human. Please. Do what I was unable to..."

"I most certainly will," I promised her. For a certain definition of 'help,' I didn't add.

I left Big Mac and Mr. Cake with the guards. I'd had my fun, and the stallions could always pull out if they were being treated too rough. No one else suddenly showed up to stop me on my way up to the royal palace. I was a little nervous about what else Celestia might have waiting for me, on the eve of our climactic showdown, but not too nervous. I had more tricks than a couple of disembodied horsecocks in my bag.

Speaking of... All that fighting had made me thirsty.

With a bit of effort, I pulled out a single, massive, disembodied yellow boob from the Bag of Holding, and began to nurse milk from the nipple as I walked down Canterlot's main street.