A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

“Vinyl, there’s a question I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while now,” Octavia and Vinyl Scratch were having breakfast together in their apartment, when Octavia finally decided to ask a question that had been on her mind for days.

“Is it about how you are overwhelmed by my sexiness and finally want to admit your undying love for me?” Vinyl asked.

“Not in the slightest Vinyl,” Octavia deadpanned. “You know that I am not a fillyfooler, and neither are you for that matter.”

Vinyl poured herself some more Sugar Hooves (Now with 20% more sugar!), “Hey, never said I wasn’t open to experimentation.”

Octavia just shook her head, “Going back to my actual question, what’s the color of your eyes?”

Vinyl’s spoon froze in the air, midway to her mouth, “I-I’m sorry what?”

“Your eyes, I’ve never actually seen them. You always have those sunglasses on, I’m not even sure if you ever take them off.”

“Uh, well Octy I’m not sure that I’m ready to tell you such a deep and intimate secret of mine,” Vinyl said sweating under her coat.

“Your say that, even though we’ve been roommates for the past three years, you can’t tell me a ‘deep and intimate secret’ like what you eye color is?” Octavia arched an eyebrow.

“Yes,” Vinyl said completely serious.

Octavia rolled her eyes, “Oh just let me take them off for a second.” When Octavia went for Vinyl’s sunglasses, Vinyl leaned further and further back in her chair, keeping out of Octavia’s reach.

“Oh hey look at the time I have that really important thing at the place with the person, so I’ll see you later!” Vinyl said and quickly ran out the door.

Octavia frowned. ‘What could be so important that she can’t take off those darn sunglasses? Well if she won’t tell me I’ll just have to find out for myself,’ she thought to herself as she started cleaning breakfast and started formulating at plan to remove Vinyl’s sunglasses.

***

About an hour we see Vinyl as she is walking down Main Street in Canterlot’s business shopping district. ‘I think I gave Octy the slip, there’s no way that she could spot me with all of these ponies here!’

“Hey Vinyl Scratch!”

Vinyl jumped and quickly turned around to see a certain sea foam green pony with a lyre on her rump, “Oh Lyra it’s you, I thought you we Octavia for a second.”

“Hehe you two have some kind of falling out?” Lyra asked, as they started walking together.

“I guess you can say that, but it doesn’t matter too much,” Vinyl gave a small shrug. The two started talking, and unknown to Vinyl they had someone tailing them. Octavia was a few steps behind her fellow musicians, subtly talking into a headset.

“Alright Lyra I’m in position,” Octavia whisper. “Remove the glasses on my signal.” Lyra gave a subtle nod as she continued talking to Vinyl Scratch. “Ready and-“

“Gloves! Come get your gloves here!” a street vender shouted, hawking his wears.

Lyra’s head snapped in his direction, “Gloves?”

“Yes indeed little miss, perfect for all your claw using friends!”

“Do you have any gloves for… fingers,” Lyra was now leaning over the poor merchant’s cart practically nose to nose with him.

“Lyra what are you doing? Lyra? Lyra!” Octavia whispered furiously into her head set, trying to get her partner’s attention. When she looked back up Vinyl was nowhere to be seen.

“Look Octavia! Hands!” Lyra held up one of her hooves now clothed in a glove. Octavia facehoofed and let out a defeated groan.

***

Vinyl was just sitting down for lunch, a large Celestia-salad sub in front of her. ‘I wonder if Octy’s mad at me for running out on her this morning.’ Vinyl pondered this for a moment, ‘Naw probably not,’ finishing that thought Vinyl started to devour her sub, unaware that Octavia was watching her from high up on the rooftop behind her.

Octavia pulled out a fishing rod, and slowly unreeled the line, ‘All I have to do is lower the hook then once the glasses are hooked I’ll reel them back up and gallop on down to catch Vinyl before she has time to find another pair.’ Vinyl didn’t notice the hook that was dangling directly in front of her eye wear, her attention completely devoted to her sandwich.

Octavia felt the line snag something, and quickly reeled it in. ‘My, her glasses are quite heavy, how in the world does she wear these all of the time,’ Octavia thought as she struggled to at reel the line in. Finally something popped up over the edge, “I have you now… Baby?” Instead of Vinyl’s glasses, a baby pegasus slowly spun on the end of her line, giggling.

“My baby where did my baby go?” a concerned parent called from down bellow. Octavia slowly lowered the baby back down to earth.

***

Hey Octy I’m home! OOF!” as soon as Vinyl walked in the door she was tackled to the floor by Octavia, huffing and puffing with a mad glint in her eye. Vinyl was shocked for a second, but recovered quickly, “Well see if you had just admitted to your love for me this morning we could have gotten out of the way hours ago.”

“I have been following you all day trying to get those infernal sunglasses away from you! All! Day! They come off now!” and with the rant out of the way Octavia made several furious attempts to remove her roommate’s spectacles.

“No Octavia you don’t know what your-“ Finally Octavia removed Vinyl’s glasses.

***

Miles away in Ponyville.

“Ooo! Itchy nose and twitchy mane! Looks like someone got Vinyl Scratch’s glasses off!” Pinkie Pie told Gummy and continued his bath.

***

“AHHHHH!” the two musicians screamed together as two massive laser beams shot out of Vinyl’s unshielded eyes. “My shades! Give me my shades!” Vinyl shouted at Octavia.

“Here take them! TakethemtakethemtakethemTAKETHEM!” Octavia shouted back and thrust them into Vinyl’s outstretched hooves.

Vinyl quickly put them back where they belonged, “There, whew! That was fun.” She gave a nervous giggle.

Octavia just gaped, “You just… with the PEW! PEW! And and…”

“Ya they’ve always done that. Reason I got the shades, waaaaaay back when I was little,” she looked up. “Our fellow apartment goers might not be so happy with the renovations we made though, heheh.”

“I… I… I! I need to lie down,” and with that Octavia fainted right where she stood.

***

Well that ended up being more crack-y than I expected. Crack-y but fun.

Picture: DON'T TAKE OFF THE GLASSES

Artist: Atomic-Chinchilla