I really don't have time for this junk.
Rainbow Dash landed on the plush roof of Fluttershy's cottage and sat down, resting his wings. A tiny sparrow perched on one of the birdhouses near him cocked its head inquisitively.
I bet he's not even going to want to come. Puh.
Rainbow Dash flared his wings, shooing the small bird away in a flurry of feathers and chirping.
Whatever. Let's just get this over with.
"Rainbow Dash? What are you doing on my roof? Um, you aren't scaring my friends, I hope..."
Fluttershy's head poked out of the roof window, his eyes moving to and from Rainbow Dash and a small pile of sparrow feathers.
"Whoa, hey there, Fluttershy. Didn't expect to see you up this high, erm..." Nice going, Dash. Off to a real good start, there. "Anyway, I came to ask you something. Do you—"
Fluttershy looked down at the windowsill. "Um... do you want to come inside and talk there instead? On the ground?"
"...Yeah, that'd be okay, I guess."
Rainbow Dash clambered through the open window and followed Fluttershy downstairs to the squawking horde of stray animals he called a living room. Fluttershy gingerly moved several woodland creatures from his couch and offered him a seat.
A curious badger stuck its nose in the feathers of his wing as Fluttershy sat across from him in a plush chair. Raising a hoof, he quelled the uproar and nodded, listening intently as Rainbow Dash began speaking.
"So, Shy, when's the last time you've been to Cloudsdale?"
Fluttershy moved his eyes away. "Um... I don't know. Maybe not at all since the Best Young Flier Competition. Why?"
"I've gotta head back down—up, rather—for, uh, pegasus business." Rainbow Dash bit his lip. "I was wondering if you wanted to go with me."
"Oh, I don't know, Rainbow... How long would it be? I don't think I could just leave all of my friends alone like that..."
"It'd only be for a couple of days. And don't worry! Applejack said he'd look after your animals."
Fluttershy cocked his head. "Wow, uh... You already asked? Before asking me if I would even go? Um... why do you want me, exactly?"
Play it cool, Dash. Cool as ice.
"C'mon Fluttershy. You're a pegasus. I'm a pegasus. It's like, you know, pegasus stuff. For pegasuses. So, wanna go?"
So cool.
"I suppose so. When do we leave?"
"Pack your bags, 'cause I'm already late."
~ ~ ~
The two pegasus ponies rode the winds back to their birthplace, Cloudsdale: the shining city in the sky. The blue one flew circles and loops around the yellow one, whose flight patterns could be accurately described as 'lurching'.
"C'mon, F-Shy. Shake a wing. I know you can fly faster than that."
"Sorry, Rainbow... This suitcase is just heavy," Fluttershy panted.
Rainbow Dash rolled his eyes. "Shy, I've seen you tug a hot-air balloon full of ponies. Besides, it's your own fault. You didn't have to pack forty pounds of birdseed."
"But what about all of the hungry Cloudsdale birds?"
"It's just a little further. Here, let me help!"
Rainbow Dash grabbed Fluttershy's hoof and started tugging him along at an ever-so-slightly faster pace. Fluttershy's head spinned as the world raced by around him.
"Slow down, please... I feel sick..."
"We're almost there. Look, over that hill!"
Rainbow pushed ever faster, and Fluttershy tumbled through the air like a ragdoll behind him.
As they crested the hill, a sudden updraft threw Rainbow Dash into a massive cloud bank.
For a blinding instant, his world was a stark, fluffy white. The structure of the cloud broke like balsa wood against the two ponies and their trunk full of birdseed—Rainbow heard the fluffy poof noises of critical cloud failure. Everything went dark as they fell, tangled in cloud fragments and condensation detritus.
It was something Rainbow Dash had only seen once before.
It was a cloudvalanche.
~ ~ ~
Seriously?
Rainbow Dash was the first to wake up; the first to find the weight of an entire class three cumulus pinning him against Fluttershy, his snout buried in Fluttershy's long, pink mane.
Okay, keep it together, Dash. Gotta stay cool. You're just trapped in pitch-black darkness with another stallion. That's... that's just Tuesday, right?
Rainbow Dash tried to think of anything except how compromising their current position was. Down that route led awkwardness and humiliation for one or both of them.
Oh man. This might be really hot if I wasn't so cool.
"Fluttershy. Fluttershy, wake up."
"Mwhuh? What happened? R... Rainbow, it's dark... Um... is that—"
"No it isn't be quiet."
"I really think I feel a—"
"I said be quiet Fluttershy for Celestia's sake."
"Okay, but wh—"
Rainbow Dash silenced his friend the only way he could think of: with his lips. The horses kissed in the dark.
For upwards of 12 seconds.
So cool...
As their lips parted, Fluttershy giggled. "That was kind of nice, Rainbow... I wouldn't have expected you to be affectionate, um... no offense."
Oh man, I'm totally in. Yes!
"Hey, Rainbow?"
"Yeah, Shy?"
"Don't you buck clouds away for a living?"
"Oh, I guess I do, yeah."
Rainbow Dash spent a few minutes bucking the cloud away.
As the last of the fluffy stuff dissipated under the force of Rainbow Dash's powerful hooves, the two stallions blinked at the sudden rush of sunlight. When their eyes acclimated, they found they were standing on a broken sign.
Cloud X-ing. Of course.
"Hey, Shy."
"Yeah, Rainbow?"
"Looks like we were On A Crossing Arrow."
The pun lingered and festered across both of the couple of days of Rainbow Dash's "pegasus stuff" business in Cloudsdale.
They never kissed again.
Rainbow Dash regretted that pun for the rest of his very long, lonely life.
When her blanket was pulled off of her sleeping body, Twilight Sparkle rolled over. She groaned and shivered through the sudden rush of cool air. Her curtain was flung open, and she buried her face in the pillows to protect her eyes from the irritating rays of the sun.
"Come on, Twilight, the sun's up!" a voice called out through the haze of sleep.
"Not yet, Spike... Just a few more minutes..." Twilight mumbles drifted into incoherence as a hoof brushed against her cheek.
"Spike's downstairs fixin' us up some grub, darlin'."
Twilight strained her eyes open to find a pair of green ones taking up most of her vision. Orange skin... pale yellowish hair... Applejack?!
Oh, wait. Yeah, of course, Applejack. Twilight shook her head to clear her muddled thoughts.
"G'morning, A.J.," Twilight said, "is it really time to get up already?"
Applejack nodded. "O'course. The sun's up, ainnit? That means so are we."
"I was just up late reading this fascinating textbook that the princess sent me... I'm almost to chapter forty-three, 'Neutrino Thaumaturgy', an'—"
Twilight yawned, and Applejack wrapped hooves around her. "Let's talk about it over breakfast, Twi," she whispered, squeezing her marefriend.
~ ~ ~
"And so anyway, in laypony's terms, I can break down quarks with magic to make up all kinds of strange and charming effects from the top to the bottom of the magical spectrum. Isn't that amazing? Just imagine what unicorns thousands of years ago would have done with this theory. It would have launched magical studies ahead by centuries!"
Applejack chewed attentively, her gaze shifting to and from Twilight and her food. "Aw, Twi, that's mighty impressive. Ah wish Ah understood whatcha were talkin' about, but it sounds really excitin'!"
Twilight nodded, smiling. "It is, Applejack. Just you wait: you're going to see some amazing things when I work out some of the finer details."
"Can't wait, Twi," Applejack said, "butcha better eat up; yer oatmeal's gettin' cold."
Twilight pecked at her food as Applejack stared at the rest of her sleeping family. Only Spike was awake and eating; he'd grown up listening to Twilight's monologues, and besides, he usually understood whatever it was she was babbling about. Applejack flicked a spoon playfully at her brother, Big Macintosh.
"Interestin' stuff," Big Mac said, rubbing the spot on his snout where the spoon struck, "ain't it, Granny?"
"Huh? Wazzat!? Didja make me some great-gran'kids yet?" Granny Smith asked as she jolted awake.
"No, Granny."
"Fig'rs! Still foolin' around with that Caramel, Ah 'spect. Why don'tcha get a nice marefriend like yer brother Jack?"
"Ah'm no stallion, Granny," Applejack said, blushing as Twilight raised an eyebrow at her.
"Pah! Ah guess it's up to Apple Bloom. Y'won't let me down, will ya, child?"
Apple Bloom rolled her head over on the table. "Yeah, Granny, whatever ya say," she said.
Granny Smith smiled. "That's mah lil' Bloom! A red-blood Apple through'n'through. The Apple clan didn't get where we are 'cause of colt-cuddlin' and mare-marryin'. Do y'got any stallions in yer sights, girl? How about Snails? He's a real good down-home ol' boy, don'tcha think?"
Twilight and Applejack snuck out as Apple Bloom's face turned as red as her Apple blood.
"Grannyyy!"
~ ~ ~
The two mares closed the bedroom door and sighed before giggling at each other.
"Sorry 'bout Granny, Twi. She can be a lil'... abrasive."
"Don't worry about that, Applejack. I love your family." Twilight's eyes twinkled. "All of it."
"Oh, Twi. That's mighty sweet of ya."
The two ponies shared a quick kiss. Twilight blushed—even after a year of apple-flavored kisses, intimacy was something she refused to take for granted—and Applejack gave her neck a tender nuzzle.
"Listen, Ah've gotta head out to the orchard 'n' start my day. You gonna go back to yer book? Ah wouldn't mind seeing some of yer new magic stuff when Ah get back," Applejack said.
Twilight floated her thick, modern textbook from the shelf and nodded. "Count on it. I just need a couple more hours of practice, and I should be on the cutting edge of magical possibility."
Applejack headed out and Twilight sat down, her eyes idly skimming the same paragraph over and over again. She thought about her marefriend outside, sweating through hours of hard physical labor. How easy it would be to just walk out and harvest their whole crop in an instant, with a little magic! But, that wasn't the Apple family way, except during emergencies, and this wasn't one.
She gave up on reading after a few minutes, and flopped down on their bed. Her eyes began to droop in the warm summer sunlight. The humid air fogged her thoughts and she curled up and snuggled a pillow. Just a quick nap, then I'll get right back to—
Knock, knock, knock. "Hey, come on! Lemme in!" Spike's voice called through the door.
Twilight let out an irritated snort and a purple glow surrounded the door handle. Spike burst through the door and slammed it behind him.
"Phew, thanks, Twilight. Things were getting crazy out there." Spike leaned against the wall, catching his breath.
"That sounds like some pretty standard Apple Family." Twilight giggled. "Is Apple Bloom still crushing on you?"
Spike rubbed his temples. "You don't know the half of it, Twilight. You should have seen her hopping along after me back there. I thought I wasn't going to be able to lose her!"
"Aw, poor lil' Spike, mares chasing after him for once. What ever will he do?" Twilight teased.
Spike sunk to the ground and buried his face in his claws. "This isn't funny, Twilight. Do you know that she pinned me down and tried to kiss me yesterday?"
"Aw, Spike." Twilight pushed herself out of bed and gave the little dragon a big hug. "I'm sorry that happened to you, but that still just sounds cute."
"It's not," Spike whimpered, "I just want me and her to stay friends."
Spike hugged Twilight as the bedroom door burst open and dozens of small multicolored ponies swarmed into the room, babbling. Various tiny lookalikes of Granny Smith, Big Mac and Apple Bloom surrounded Twilight and stood perfectly still, watching her.
"What the—"
The group burst into a chaotic cacophony of sound. Twilight held onto Spike, covering his body with her own for protection from the inexplicable mob.
"What's going on, Spike?!" she screamed over the noise. Looking down at the dragon, she saw Applejack's purple, scaly, smiling face.
"Ah don't rightly know, Sugarcube," the creature said.
Twilight blacked out.
