PrincessPrincessPrincess

by zaponator

Rating: everyone
Tags: Applejack, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Rarity, Random, Crossover, Human, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 12078

Twilight Sparkle inadvertently causes an inter-dimensional royal incident. Rarity and Applejack spend the day together. Rainbow Dash makes a new friend. Sweetie Belle drinks tea. The world ends.

Twilight Sparkle inadvertently causes an inter-dimensional royal incident. Rarity and Applejack spend the day together. Rainbow Dash makes a new friend. Sweetie Belle drinks tea.
The world ends.

Published 2016-08-05 00:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-08-05 00:10:01 UTC

The End of The World

"Applejack!"

Spike's desperate shout came from all the way down at the Acres' front gate. Applejack looked up from where she was repairing a cracked wagon wheel beside the barn. Her ears perked up and she wiped the sweat from her forehead. After barely a few seconds of waiting, a purple and green figure came speed-waddling up the path towards her.

"Applejack... there... you are!" Spike exclaimed between heaving breaths.

"Well shoot, Spike," Applejack chuckled. "You run all the way from the castle?"

Spike opened his mouth, coughed several times, and finally settled on simply nodding as he continued to catch his breath.

Applejack removed her toolbelt and set it down next to the damaged wagon, then turned to face Spike with a slight smirk.

"What's Twilight got herself into this time?" Her emerald eyes rolled skyward. "She burn down your kitchen?"

Spike shook his head.

"She bring another piece of furniture to life?"

Another shake of the little dragon's head.

"She do something to threaten the existence of our entire world... again?"

Spike hesitated, seemed to think for a moment, and eventually shook his head.

"Well shucks. What exactly is the emergency?"

Spike held up one claw, paused, took a long breath, then finally managed to pant out, "There's... a dead thing... in the lab."

Applejack's amused smirk instantly fell from her face. Her back tensed up and a dark frown marred her freckled muzzle. There was a pregnant pause while Applejack waited for Spike to correct his statement, but the little dragon merely looked up at her expectantly.

Finally, Applejack released a long and weary sigh out the side of her muzzle. She picked up her toolbelt and tossed it towards Spike, who caught it with only a bit of fumbling.

"Take that inside, Spike. I'll go see to Twilight." Applejack's tone was no-nonsense.

As Spike hopped to it, Applejack turned and began a swift trot towards Twilight's castle.

"Dangit..." Applejack muttered under her breath as she passed through the farm's gate. "I hate it when this happens."

Rarity was enjoying the peaceful summer morning from the comfort of her design room in Carousel Boutique. She delicately sipped from a cup of tea held aloft in shimmering blue magic. Birdsong floated through the window on a pleasantly cool breeze that wafted through her myriad of fabrics while she picked out just the perfect one for a new sundress.

Tea, birdsong, dresses, and utterly sublime weather to enjoy it all in. Rarity took another dainty sip of tea through an uncontrollable smile. It was going to be a glorious morning.

"Hey, Rarity! What'cha doin'!?"

Rarity flinched hard. The teacup wobbled and faltered, but she raised a forehoof just in time to precariously catch the cup before it had a chance to shatter on the floor.

Rarity paused to take several deep breaths.

"Why hello, Sweetie Belle!" Rarity turned around with a wide, plastic grin.

Sweetie Belle looked up briefly from where she was rolling a length of fabric out across the floor. "Yeah, hey, sis."

Rarity's eye twitched. "Sweetie Belle, please put that away. That's Saddle Arabian silk, not a... rug."

"But I'm boooored!" Sweetie Belle groaned, flopping onto her back and leaving the fabric where it lay.

Rarity sighed and quickly rolled up the silk in a flash of magic. "I'm afraid I can't help you there. I'm terribly busy today."

"You don't look busy. When I came down here you were just standing there and staring out the window for like five minutes."

"Ahem, yes, well..." Rarity coughed. "My work may be more... esoteric than some, but I assure you I am quite tasked."

"Whatever." Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes. She glanced towards the cup in Rarity's hoof and her expression lit up. "Hey, is that tea? Can I have some?"

"Pshhh," Rarity scoffed. The cup was once again safely captured in her magic and floated to her lips for a small sip. "I think not, dear sister. This is imported tea straight from Chineigh. It was a gift from a rather high profile client. Each drop must be savoured and appreciated as only a refined connoisseur can. To waste even a single ounce would be tantamount to a crime, I dare say."

"Awww..." Sweetie Belle's ears folded and her expression drooped. "You coulda just said no..."

Rarity looked down at her dejected sister and couldn't help but sigh deeply. "I'll make you an iced tea instead, hm?"

Sweetie Belle went from kicked-puppy to bright-eyed and happy in less time than it took to blink.

"Yayyy!"

Rarity chuckled and took another sip of tea. "But only if you run along and allow me to finish my beverage in peace. I'll call you when yours is ready."

"Deal!" Sweetie Belle exclaimed joyfully, before scampering out of the room with a trail of giggles.

Rarity could only shake her head and smile. She turned back to the window and continued to appreciate the simple serenity of the quiet morning. Only moments later, yet another interruption occurred, only this one was trotting down the street outside her house.

"Is that... Applejack?" Rarity muttered to herself, one eyebrow raised.

Sure enough, Applejack was speedily trotting into town towards Twilight's castle. More concerning, however, was the deep frown etched into the farmer's muzzle. The expression looked out of place on that freckled face. Seeing it brought a concerned grimace to Rarity's own muzzle. She hated seeing Applejack frown.

Before she even knew what she was doing, Rarity had taken a step towards her door. She hesitated, however, when her eyes were drawn back to the mostly-full cup of tea floating in her magical grasp. Rarity winced. Her gaze flickered from the cup, to the door, then back to the cup. Finally, a sigh burst from her lungs and she deflated in place.

Moments later, Sweetie Belle tumbled back into the room.

"Rarity! It's been a thousand hours! When do I get iced tea?"

Silence.

"Rarity?" Sweetie Belle called out to an empty room.

She looked around the entire room, but her sister was nowhere to be found. After a minute of searching, she happened across a cup of tea sitting abandoned on the windowsill. It was still hot.

Sweetie Belle blinked in confusion, but that was quickly replaced by an exuberant grin.

"Score!"

Applejack could see the top of the castle growing closer, and her frown only deepened at the sight. She wasn't at all looking forward to arriving there, but she knew being quick about it was important. So it was she was made a fast trot, and hated every step of it.

It wasn't that she didn't want to help her friend. She certainly didn't resent Twilight or anything. It was just a hassle, and she had her own chores to do. Besides, Twilight was an adult mare—a princess no less—who should be able to deal with her own messes.

Applejack's face was starting to hurt from holding a scowl so long.

She didn't even notice how many ponies flinched when they saw her expression, or moved to say hello only to get scared off by her glare. If she'd seen a mirror she probably would've scared herself.

"Oh Applejack, darling!"

An elegant voice snapped Applejack out of her frustrated reverie. She glanced to her left to see Rarity falling into step beside her. The fashionista was looking as radiant as ever. Her mane and coat practically glistened in the summer morning's sunlight.

Applejack nodded by way of greeting. "Howdy, Rarity."

Rarity seemed taken aback by the terse greeting, and Applejack barely restrained a wince at the sight.

"Oh dear, darling. You seem... unhappy." Rarity raised on concerned eyebrow. "What ever is the matter?"

They both trotted in silence for several moments as Applejack searched for the right words. Rarity didn't mind the lapse. She took a brief moment to examine the mare trotting alongside her. She was slightly dirty and sweaty. Clearly she'd been working outside in the sun all morning. The most immaculate part of her was the hat carefully placed atop her mane. Beneath said hat, Applejack's expression was twisted into the furthest thing from a smile, and that sight shot a pang through Rarity's heart.

Finally, Applejack spoke.

"I dunno. Twilight just needs my help, again, and... well I got my own work to tend to today, you know?" She flinched. "It sounds awful selfish when I say it out loud."

Rarity smiled gently. "Not at all, Applejack. You're perfectly entitled to your own work." She paused, then went on, "However, perhaps you should consider exactly why Twilight asked you for help."

Applejack shot Rarity a sidelong look.

"Well, darling, your farm is certainly more of a distance than, say, Carousel Boutique, is it not?"

"I... it..." Applejack blinked. "Yeah, I s'pose."

"You're dependable, Applejack. Don't count it against ponies who... depend on you." Rarity's voice softened. "You're strong, hard working... sometimes I think you're the best of us."

"Now now, there," Applejack interjected. "Don't go buttering me up too much. I ain't nothin' without the rest of you girls." There was a brief pause before Applejack blurted, "'Specially you."

Rarity nearly stumbled as her heart skipped a beat. "I-I'm sorry?"

"Uh..." Applejack sweated. "Th-That is... I... oh hey look! It's the castle!"

Both mares skidded to a stop in the street, only to stare towards where Applejack's hoof was pointing. Sure enough, it was the castle. It was also still a good 300 meters away.

"...Yes, so it would seem," Rarity said slowly.

The two of them continued trotting in comfortable silence. Only after they were almost there was the air broken by Applejack's quiet voice.

"Thanks, though, Rare."

Rarity glanced aside at Applejack, and smiled kindly. "Say nothing of it, darling. I meant everything I said." She winked. "Besides, it was absolutely killing me to see you frown."

With that, Rarity pushed through the front doors to the castle and disappeared from view. Applejack was left standing on the front step alone with a startling realization.

She hadn't any earthly idea when it had happened, but Applejack was smiling wide as a fool.

It was with a hearty chuckle that she followed Rarity through the door.

Rarity was waiting inside for Applejack. She gave the mare a sheepish look.

"Er, it would seem I neglected to ask as to why we actually came here?"

Applejack chuckled and rolled her eyes. "Spike said Twilight needs some little critter buried."

"Oh ick!" Rarity exclaimed, making a face. "That's positively dreadful. Why does she need you to take care of it?"

She walked over to a closet in the foyer and opened it. From inside, Applejack grabbed an old empty horseshoe box and balanced it on her flank before turning back to face Rarity.

Applejack shrugged. "Can't exactly bury critters here in town, can ya? I'll take the thing out to the farm." She winked. "'Sides, I'm dependable, ain't I? Ain't I... the best?"

Rarity blushed. "Mmm, y-yes, well, let's get this done then."

Applejack tilted her head. "You don't have to tag along if it makes you uncomfortable, y'know."

"P'shaw!" Rarity merely waved a hoof. "I've come this far, haven't I? It shall be a.. l-learning experience, yes?" She grinned crookedly.

"Heh," Applejack chuckled. "Alrighty then. Let's get 'er done."

The pair made their way through the foyer to the staircase that led down to Twilight's laboratory. The door was just slightly cracked open, and a foreboding darkness lingered on the other side. As Applejack pushed the door open, it let out a long, low creak which echoed through the crystaline chamber.

Rarity clung close to Applejack's side as the two made their way down the dimly lit stairs.

"Y'know," Applejack muttered, her voice reverberating in the confined space. "I've always wondered why science labs gotta be built all creepy-like and underground. Like, is there a rulebook for that? Mad Science and You?"

"I believe it's just the widely accepted ambiance, darling." Rarity shuddered. "Not that I agree with it. I would fully endorse a nice above ground laboratory, with natural lighting."

"And some plants to liven up the place," Applejack added.

"And refreshments." Rarity nodded.

"And massages."

"And a steam room."

"I think we're just describin' the spa now..."

"Oh, darling, we should go to the spa!"

"I know right!?"

Their conversation trailed off as Applejack and Rarity reached the bottom of the stairwell. Before them, the tight hallway opened up into a wide room with a high ceiling. Despite the creepy nature of the hall leading into it, the laboratory was actually well-lit. Several magical lamps dangled from chains on the ceiling, illuminating a staggering array of scientific equipment ranging from magical readout devices to chemistry sets.

Twilight Sparkle was standing in the center of the room, her back to the two ponies who'd just arrived. She looked more frazzled than usual; her mane was unkempt and her wingfeathers looked rustled. She was writing something in a notebook that hovered before her encased in sparkling magenta magic.

Applejack cleared her throat and addressed the distracted princess. "Alright, Twi, Spike told me you got a dead critter to deal with. Let's get this over and done with quick-like before Fluttershy finds out. Poor mare's fit to have a conniption if she finds out one of your lab rats done kicked the bucket... again."

Twilight jumped in surprise and whirled about to face the new voice. "Applejack? Oh, oh dear, I'm so sorry. There was a bit of a misunderstanding."

Applejack's brow furrowed. "What do you mean? Spike seemed pretty dang sure that..." Her voice trailed off as Applejack realized just how utterly silent Rarity was.

In fact, Rarity wasn't moving at all. Applejack glanced aside and noticed that Rarity had completely frozen in place, eyes wide as can be. She was staring, unblinking, at something past Twilight.

Applejack followed Rarity's gaze past the princess, up to a large, shiny metal examination table, and finally to a tall, pale creature lying motionless on the stainless steel surface. The figure had long blonde hair, and wore a flowing blue dress.

There was a long pause.

"Okay what the actual hay is that!?"

"Please don't panic!" Twilight exclaimed, panicking.

"I ain't panicking!" Applejack responded, also panicking.

Rarity, meanwhile, sloooowly tilted her head to one side as she stared hard at the bizarre lifeless creature.

"Applejack, please, don't freak out!" Twilight shouted. "Spike was a little confused, I'm sure, but—"

"I'm more'n just a little confused, Twilight!" Applejack threw her hooves up. "The hay is that thing!? The hay did it come from!?"

"Please, if you'll just calm down," Twilight said not at all calmly.

"I am calm!" Applejack shouted back.

"Is it wearing a dress?"

Rarity's question brought the room crashing into complete silence. Both other mares turned to stare at her.

"It is!" Rarity exclaimed, her face lighting up. "Oh and it is a lovely dress, too. I've not seen that style before. Oh how I wish I had my sketchbook. I could design several entire lines off this."

Rarity clapped her hooves together smilingly, only to trail off when she finally realized the atmosphere in the room.

"Ahem..." Rarity blushed slightly. "I'm sorry. Please, continue."

"Well firstly," Applejack grabbed the box off her flank and threw it on the ground. "I'm gonna need a bigger shoebox."

"What?" Twilight blinked. "Why?"

Applejack rolled her eyes. "To bury the dang thing, girl."

Twilight gasped. "That's cruel!"

"I... what?" Applejack sputtered.

Rarity leaned towards Applejack and said quietly, "I think it might not be dead, darling."

"Well not with that attitude!"

"...what?"

"I don't know!" Applejack paused to growl and rub her temples. "Look, sorry. This is just real confusin'. Can we maybe get some right proper explanation, please?"

"R-Right, my bad," Twilight said sheepishly.

Rarity raised a hoof.

"Really?" Twilight blinked. "Questions already?"

Rarity seemed to take that as her cue. "Can I have its dress?"

Twilight frowned. "No, she gets to keep her own dress."

"Well that's hardly fair if we're only going to bury her anyway."

"We're not going to bury her!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Cremation then," Rarity said with a wave of her hoof.

"Ugh... She's not dead!" Twilight groaned.

Applejack raised a hoof.

Twilight sighed. "Yes, Applejack?"

"She looks pretty dead to me."

"That's it!" Twilight threw her hooves up. "No more questions until the end!"

Rarity raised her hoof.

"No!" Twilight growled.

Rarity huffed and crossed her forelegs.

"Okay look," Twilight said sternly. "This is called a human. I met many similar to it when I traveled through the mirror to Canterlot High. You remember that, right?"

Applejack and Rarity both nodded slowly.

Twilight pointed to the motionless human on the table. "See, two long legs, two arms with hands, small nose and eyes. It's just like I described from my visits to the other world."

Rarity squinted. "So this is a... student, from Canterlot High School?"

"No!" Twilight exclaimed.

Applejack rolled her eyes. "'Course not. That's too easy."

"Well, she's from someplace very similar," Twilight clarified. "Her appearance and clothing are far too dissimilar from anything I ever observed in my visits to that world. I think the obvious answer, taking the multiverse theory into account, is that she's from yet another alternate dimension populated by remarkably similar beings."

"Why so sure 'bout that?" Applejack said as she tilted her head aside.

"Well..." Twilight muttered. "She didn't exactly come from the mirror."

Rarity raised a hoof and opened her mouth. She lingered there for one suffocating moment, then lowered her hoof and closed her mouth into a frown.

Twilight winced. "I... uh... I sorta brought her here by accident."

"Oh great." Applejack sighed. "So you stole a human from some other world and killed her—"

"She's not dead!"

"—and just how exactly did this critter end up here?"

Rarity glanced over from where she was examining the dress even closer.

"I must admit a certain curiosity towards the matter myself, darling. Just what were you playing at?"

"Well, I was working on a new spell. Actually it was a modification of an existing spell, combining parts from several other spells. Really you could say nothing in the spell itself was 'new', per se, but the purpose and functionality of the finished product would be, to my knowledge, totally unique—"

"Focus, darling."

"R-Right, sorry. Ahem. Anyway, so I was trying to perfect a spell that could recall the princesses of Equestria to a single location on command. With all the dangers we've had to face, most notably Tirek, I wanted to make sure we could unite for Equestria's defense anytime and anywhere."

"That sounds mighty noble, Twi, but I ain't sure how exactly it led us to a dead human sprawled on your table," Applejack said.

"Not dead, and I was just about to get to that." Twilight cleared her throat. "As it turns out, I made a... key error in the composition of the spell. I forgot to calibrate it for more than three dimensions."

Applejack and Rarity blinked in perfect unison.

"Uh... say what now?" Applejack uttered.

"Well, you remember I mentioned multiverse theory?" Twilight smiled sheepishly. "The spell was intended to seek and find all princesses across all of Equestria, and then to teleport them to the spell's point of origin. Or at least relatively close to it.

Twilight continued, "The problem is, Equestria and our entire world exist in three dimensions, but magic doesn't play by the same rules. The spell, apparently, reached out across the theoretical 5th dimension into the other worlds that overlap our own as per the multiverse. The spell grabbed any and all princesses it was able to find and brought them here."

"Oh my..." Rarity swooned. "So this is a princess?" She gestured to the figure on Twilight's table.

Twilight nodded. "Yes, it would seem so."

"What a shame. Our first chance to meet inter-dimensional royalty and she's dead on arrival."

"Not dead."

"Now hang on a sec." Applejack raised a hoof. Her brow furrowed. "I got a bone to pick with all this. Multiverse theory would say that we got infinite universes all overlapping-like our own here. If your spell crossed through worlds and grabbed any princesses it reached, how come we got just the one? We should all be crushed to death under an infinite mass of princesses fillin' every bit of space in our universe."

Twilight blinked.

Rarity blinked harder.

Both mares squinted at Applejack as if seeing her for the first time.

"What?" Applejack huffed. "I read a book or two."

"That's, uh... a remarkably good question—"

"Easy now," Applejack growled.

Twilight gulped. "I can't pretend to fully understand how the multiverse is composed. Nopony really can. I don't know why the spell only managed to, er, 'reach' a few princesses, but it did."

Rarity scratched her head. "But the scenario that Applejack described... could have happened?"

Twilight grinned sheepishly. "In theory, yes."

There was a long pause.

Finally, Rarity uttered, "Well it's not the worst way to go, is it?"

Applejack sighed. "Rarity—"

"After all, one can never have too many princesses."

"Rarity—"

"Better than being crushed by anything else, I dare say."

"Rarity!" Applejack finally snapped.

"I say, darling, there's no need to shout. Are you trying to wake the dead?"

Both mares paused and stared pointedly at the lifeless figure on Twilight's table.

Twilight released a long, long sigh and rubbed her forehead with one hoof while muttering, "She's not dead."

"Anyhow," Applejack continued, "y'all're missin' a vital point of what Twilight said." She turned to stare down Twilight with a stern glare. "Twilight. You said that your spell reached a few princesses."

Twilight nodded sheepishly. "Yes."

"As in more than one."

"Yes."

"As in somewhere outside this room, running around all free-like and totally unaccounted for."

"...Probably."

"Dangit!" Applejack stomped her hoof.

"Oh dear," Rarity remarked. "I do hope they haven't managed to get into any trouble."

Twilight chuckled nervously and waved a hoof. "I wouldn't be too worried. After all, they're princesses. Well-behaved, well-mannered princesses. It's hardly the end of the world."

"Well," Applejack said through a smirk, "at least we know this'n won't be stirrin' up a ruckus, on account of being dea—"

"For the last time she's not dead!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Y'know, you keep sayin' that..." Applejack glanced at the motionless human princess. "But she looks pretty dead."

"No, she's simply asleep. I checked."

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Really now?"

The farmer ambled over to the table and raised one hoof. She sharply jabbed the sleeping princess in the side several times, but elicited no reaction.

"Hey! Wake up, sleepy highness!"

"Stop that, Applejack." Twilight sighed. "I've already tried. Nothing we do is going to wake her up. I still haven't figured out why."

Rarity squinted and tapped her chin as if deep in thought. "Maybe... she's really tired."

A beat.

Applejack stared at Rarity beneath a furrowed brow. "Yeah, that's probably it."

Meanwhile, deep into the Whitetail woods outside Ponyville, the morning sun cut clear slanted rays of light through the forest canopy. Insects and distant animals sang out a cacophonous melody of background noise, undercutting the sounds of three little fillies crashing through the undergrowth.

"I'm telling you girls, I saw something weird behind those trees!" Scootaloo called out as she hopped over a fallen log.

"And I'm tellin' you... shut up!" Apple Bloom groaned. "Where are we goin'? Are we just gonna wander aimlessly through the woods until we happen to stumble across this mysterious... thing you saw?"

"Yeah."

"Oh... okay I guess." Apple Bloom shrugged on the move. She turned her head over her shoulder and called out, "Hey, Sweetie Belle! Keep up will ya?"

Sweetie Belle scampered along behind her two friends, clambering over logs and underbrush.

"S-Sorry, girls. I'm trying my best to keep up."

"Y'know, you'd probably have and easier time of it if you ditched that cup," Apple Bloom pointed out.

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom paused in a clearing to wait for their friend to catch up. Sweetie Belle huffed and puffed her way up next to them, then paused to shoot Apple Bloom a stern look.

"No way I'm losing this," Sweetie Belle said proudly. She held a teacup in her flickering green magic, and attempted to smile victoriously despite the sweat dripping down the side of her face at the effort.

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Well, then just drink it and we can go drop the cup off."

Sweetie Belle shook her head. "Uh uh. This isn't just regular tea."

"Here we go..." Apple Bloom muttered.

"This tea is important tea! Rarity got it as a present." Sweetie Belle beamed. "She said each drop has to be, uh... savoured and appreciated by a... r-refined... commissioner!" She nodded decisively. "That means I gotta drink it slow. Also, wasting even a sip would mean I have to go to jail."

Apple Bloom looked skeptical, but Scootaloo's eyes widened.

"Whoa! Really?"

"Yep! Rarity said it was a crime."

"Wow..." Scootaloo shook her head slowly. "Well fine then, just be careful."

Apple Bloom hesitated a few more seconds before sighing defeatedly. "Well alright. I guess we don't want to do crimes. We'll go a little slower so you don't spill the tea."

The three continued marching through the woods at a more moderate pace, with Scootaloo still leading the way. They hadn't trekked much farther when Scootaloo suddenly stopped in place. The little pegasus stiffened as she stared through the bushes at something.

"Oh what now?" Apple Bloom grumbled.

"Shh!" Scootaloo hissed.

Apple Bloom bristled. "Don't you shush me! I—"

"Shh!"

"Fer cryin' out loud, I—"

"Apple Bloom, I think it's out there. Be quiet."

Apple Bloom's mouth closed with an audible clack. She shuffled up closer to Scootaloo and tried to peer through the brush.

"You sure?" Apple Bloom whispered. "I don't see anything."

"Pretty sure," Scootaloo replied under her breath. "I think I saw it moving around. It was super tall, and it didn't look like any animal I've ever seen."

"I dun' like this," Apple Bloom muttered. "We should go get my sister—"

"Or Rainbow Dash."

"—whatever. Let's just go and let somepony else deal with the weird monster."

"Wait..." Scootaloo's brow knit together in confusion. "Where's Sweetie Belle?"

Silence.

Apple Bloom sighed. "Well sonuva—"

A lone young woman moved swiftly and carefully through the forest. She had no idea where she was, she didn't even remember what she was doing before finding herself there. Her first course of action had to be finding some sort of civilization as quickly as possible.

She was dressed in baggy pants and a loose shirt, with a belt of fabric around her waist. She moved between trees and brush with military efficiency and expertise, examining the world around her with much curiosity. The plant life was strange, unfamiliar. It was different from any forest she'd seen in her homeland. That was the most concerning realization yet. Wherever she was, it as far from home.

There was a noise, a rustling in the bushes. The woman dropped to her belly and listened. Sure enough, the noise repeated itself, only this time accompanied by another. Voices. They were distant, and unrecognizable, but there was definitely someone out there talking.

The woman very nearly called out, but hesitated. She didn't know where she was, and more importantly she didn't know who those voices belonged to. She was no stranger to the evils of the world. There was no guarantee that someone wandering these strange woods would be friendly.

Her mind made up, the woman stood up as carefully as possible and started sneaking away.

The voices stopped.

The woman cursed under her breath. They'd probably seen her. Still, she remained calm, and didn't increase her pace. They weren't pursuing, yet, and panicking certainly wouldn't help anything. If she could just get out of the area before they converged on her position—

"Hi there!" A chipper young voice shouted from directly next to her.

"Ahh!" The young woman leapt back in surprise, only to trip over an exposed root and tumble onto her back.

"Oh goodness," the voice exclaimed." Are you alright?"

Sweetie Belle tilted her head in concern as she watched the lanky creature flail about on the ground in an attempt to right itself. When it finally managed to reach a sitting position, it was still taller than Sweetie was standing up. The creature looked at Sweetie Belle with wide eyes and a gaping mouth.

Sweetie Belle fidgeted nervously. She still didn't know anything about this creature, but it had seemed so lost and confused. It probably just needed a friend.

"Uh... hi?" Sweetie awkwardly waved a hoof.

The creature blinked, then blinked again. Finally, after several seconds of stunned silence, it waved one of its hands back at Sweetie.

Sweetie Belle grinned. "Hey, I knew you were friendly!" A short pause, and then, "So... what are you?"

"M-My name... is Fa Mulan. I'm a citizen of the great Empire of China."

"Neat!"

The clearing fell into awkward silence. Sweetie Belle coughed. Mulan stared for a long time before finally breaking the silence.

"So... what are you?"

"I'm Sweetie Belle! I'm a citizen of hugs!"

With that, Sweetie Belle dashed forward and wrapped her hooves as far as they could go around Mulan's torso.

A blink. "Okay..."

Several seconds later, Sweetie Belle broke the embrace and backed off. She grinned sheepishly and rubbed one forehoof against the other.

"You... l-looked like you could use a hug."

Before she even realized it, a smile had formed across Mulan's face. "Thank you... I actually feel better."

"Want some tea?"

Mulan perked up. "Hm?"

"Tea," Sweetie Belle repeated. She lifted it up with her magic and hovered the small cup before Mulan.

Mulan blinked several times at the display of magic, before shrugging. "It's not the strangest thing I've seen."

"What?" Sweetie Belle blinked innocently.

"Never mind," Mulan said quickly. She smiled kindly. "I would love some tea. Thank you."

The woman took the cup from Sweetie's magical grasp and raised it to her mouth for a sip. Strangely, the taste was remarkably similar to tea she'd had in the past. Perhaps not everything about this world was so different after all.

"Yay!" Sweetie Belle cheered when she saw her new friend liked it.

"Sweetie Belle, is that you?" A distant scratchy voice echoed through the trees.

"Oh hey," Sweetie Belle exclaimed. "That's my friends!"

"Your friends?"

"Yeah, we came out here looking for a weird monster. Then I found you!" Sweetie Belle smiled brightly.

"...Right," Mulan muttered.

There was a rustling and crashing noise in the bushes growing closer and closer, accompanied by more excited shouts from Sweetie Belle's friends. Moments later, a tiny orange filly burst onto the scene.

"Sweetie Belle!"

"Hey, Scootaloo." Sweetie waved.

Scootaloo skidded to a stop, wide-eyed. She pointed a shaky forehoof. "What the crap is that thing!?"

Apple Bloom emerged from the undergrowth at that exact moment, grumbling, "Watch yer dang language, Scoot—" She froze upon seeing Mulan. "What the fff—"

"Hey girls!" Sweetie Belle greeted smilingly.

"Sweetie Belle," Scootaloo hissed. "The thing we were chasing, it's right behind you."

Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes. "Well duh. And it's not a thing. It's a Mulan."

Mulan waved. "Hi."

"Oooooooohhh," Apple Bloom and Scootaloo hummed in unison.

Sweetie Belle pointed to her friends in succession. "That's Scootaloo, and the other one's Apple Bloom."

"This is so cool!" Scootaloo exclaimed, hooves to her face. "We found an alien!"

Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. "It's not an alien, Scoots."

"What makes you so sure!?"

"Because aliens aren't real, dummy!"

"No you!"

"Girls," Sweetie Belle interjected, frowning. "If she's an alien, then where's her spaceship?"

All three Crusaders thought about that for a moment, then nodded.

Mulan, who had been watching their exchange with some amusement, suddenly found three fillies crowding together directly in front of her face. She flinched back, but they merely followed.

After several silent and awkward seconds, Scootaloo was the first to speak.

"Where'syourspaceship?" the pegasus filly whispered hoarsely.

"Um..." Mulan leaned back slightly. "I... don't have a ship of any kind."

Scootaloo deflated, while Apple Bloom smirked victoriously.

Sweetie Belle raised a hoof. "How many Mulans live on your planet?"

Mulan squinted. "Uh... like, three?"

The crusaders all scrunched up their faces. It was adorable.

"Three!?" Scootaloo exclaimed. "That sounds like a pretty dumb planet!" A yellow hoof smacked her upside the back of the head. "Ow!"

"Scootaloo!" Apple Bloom admonished. "You can't go calling entire planets dumb!"

"Why not!? It's only got three people on it!"

"I think it sounds fun," Sweetie interjected. "You could go your whole life without ever meeting another living soul!"

The other two Crusaders stared at her in complete silence for several seconds.

Scootaloo threw her forelegs up. "In what universe is that your idea of fun!?"

Sweetie Belle blinked. "Oh, did I say fun? I meant terrible..."

"What did I just say about insulting entire planets?" Apple Bloom groaned. "Y'all two are gonna cause an interplanetary war probably!"

Scootaloo blinked slowly, then perked up with a grin. "Awesome!"

"Hey!" Sweetie Belle pouted. "Wars are not awesome! I got into a war with Rarity's fridge once and I wasn't allowed to eat for three days!" She crossed her arms and huffed. "Stupid post-treaty trade sanctions..."

"Um, girls?" Mulan interjected before the conversation could confuse her any more. "There are a lot more than three people where I come from. Mulan is my name."

Three sets of eyes blinked owlishly at her.

Sweetie Belle tilted her head to one side. "Then where'd you come from?"

"I... already told you."

Sweetie Belle blinked.

"Alright..." Mulan muttered. "I come from a faraway land called China." She winced. "Only... I'm beginning to suspect it is even farther away than I ever thought."

"Well how'd you get here?" Scootaloo asked with a raised eyebrow.

Mulan sighed. "I'm not sure. I don't even remember what I was doing. I just... woke up in this forest. I've been trying to find my way home, if that's even possible..." She took a sip of tea to calm herself slightly.

"Awww," Sweetie Belle cooed. "That's kinda sad."

Apple Bloom tapped her chin. "We should take her to Princess Twilight."

"Yeah!" Scootaloo agreed loudly. "If anypony would know how to get you home, it'd be Twilight!"

"You will help me get home?" Mulan said, almost disbelieving.

"Pshh, 'course we will," Apple Bloom said. "You seem friendly enough, and it'd be plum awful to just leave ya here in the woods."

Mulan smiled gratefully, then stood up and gave a slight bow. "Thank you," she said earnestly.

"Heh, no problem. We know we're awesome," Scootaloo said confidently, only to shrink down when the other two Crusaders shot her a glare.

"Anyway," Sweetie Belle said, "we should probably head back to town. I don't think I even told my sister I was going out. She's gonna think I'm dead again."

"Oh, Sweetie Belle," Mulan said quickly. "Do you want your tea back?"

"Nah, you can have the rest. I'm over it."

"Right." Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. "Let's—"

She was cut off by a rustling, a very loud rusting. The three fillies and one woman turned to stare in the same direction. The noise grew closer. The Crusaders were all wide-eyed, while Mulan was smiling.

"Another friend of yours?" the woman asked.

"Uh..." Scootaloo gulped. "I don't think—"

Whatever she didn't think was cut off as a massive ball of bristly fur and razor-sharp claws smashed through the undergrowth next to them. It made to lunge for the closest living flesh, which turned out to be Sweetie Belle. The filly barely had time to shriek as a massive paw flew straight for her head.

Mulan reacted quicker than any of them. In a flash, she dove for Sweetie Belle, grabbed the tiny filly, and clutched her to her chest as they jumped out of the way of the attack. As Mulan came to a sliding stop, she gently set Sweetie down and furrowed her brow.

"Not a friend then," she said without breaking her gaze from the gigantic feral bear.

She stepped in front of the three fillies and set into a defensive stance, only to glance down and realize she was still holding a fine teacup in her right hand.

"Uhhh..."

Sweetie Belle shouted desperately, "Don't spill a drop or you'll go to jaaaaiiiil!"

"Sweetie Belle, that is so not true!" Apple Bloom retorted.

"Not with that attitude!"

"What!?"

Mulan tuned them out and focused on the problems in front of her. Fend off a wild bear, and don't spill the tea. She'd faced worse odds in the past.

Not a second later, the bear snorted angrily and let out a great roar as it charged the woman who would soon be its breakfast.

"Whoa!" Mulan hopped backwards, stumbling a bit as she struggled to hold the teacup aloft.

The bear took a swipe at her head, and Mulan ducked just in time. The bear snarled and stomped at her, but she scampered to the side. She hopped back to her feet, made sure the tea was still okay, and looked back up at the bear just in time so see a massive paw flailing towards her midsection.

Mulan gasped and tucked her stomach back back back until her body formed a C shape that the bear's attack whistled through. She bounced back, only for the tea to slosh wildly in its cup. Mulan yelped and danced about attempting to keep the liquid inside.

She hopped, jumped, and shuffled about the forest in a desperate attempt to keep even a single drop of the sloshing drink from spilling. Miraculously, she was successful. Even more miraculously, she didn't even notice the wild animal madly attempting to gut her the whole time.

Three confused fillies watched from the sidelines.

"What... is she doing?" Apple Bloom breathed.

"It's working isn't it?" Scootaloo retorted as another of the bear's attacks whooshed harmlessly past Mulan's flailing figure.

Sweetie Belle squinted. "But she looks like Rarity on a Saturday night after she sends me to bed early and then goes out for a bunch of hours and then comes home and thinks I'm asleep."

"Yeah," Scootaloo nodded sagely, "or my mom every day."

Mulan was finally able to get the tea under control, and stood up proudly with it in both hands. A wide smile adorned her face for all of the two seconds it took her to turn around and notice the massive death-animal staring her down with a fiery glare.

The bear was panting hard, nearly wheezing. No prey had given it such a workout in a long time. Plus, ever since last hibernation, it'd been meaning to get into better shape, but it's just so hard. The first few days of the new year it ran every day, but that regimen petered out before long. The bear had told itself that this was the year it would make a lifestyle change, but maybe next year would be better. The bear was under a lot of stress right now already. Putting it off one more year couldn't hurt. Maybe it would even go on a diet.

Unfortunately for Mulan, the bear wasn't thinking about that at the moment. In spite of its exhaustion, the one solitary thought consuming its mind centered around killing this strange and annoying prey. That was conveyed very clearly through its eyes.

Mulan gulped.

The bear roared and swung at her with blinding speed. Mulan screamed and ducked, at the same time flinging her arms up to protect herself. Time seemed to slow as she realized what she'd done. She could see the bear's claws passing harmlessly overhead. She could see spittle flying from the enraged beast's lips. Worst of all, she could see the glint of a teacup high in the air above her.

Her heart skipped a beat. Time resumed.

Mulan used her coiled legs to spring into the air suddenly. She angled her jump towards the nearest tree, and kicked off the hard wood with a grunt. This carried her higher still, directly over the bear she'd been fighting. But she didn't care about that anymore; her goal was still above her. Mulan planted both feet on the back of the confused animal's head and kicked off as hard as she could.

That final leap managed to carry her on an intercept course with the teacup, which she nimbly caught as she front-flipped through the air. She stretched her arms out and plummeted to the earth, landing in a controlled stance. A heartbeat later, and she held the cup blindly out to one side just in time for every drop of the drink to fall from above and land within it.

The woods fell totally silent, but only for a moment.

"That was totally awesome!" Scootaloo exclaimed at the top of her lungs. She galloped over to Mulan's side, wings buzzing excitedly.

"Yeah!" Sweetie Belle shouted. "Also you beat the bear!"

Mulan glanced behind her, and sure enough the bear's face had been driven into the dirt hard enough to render it unconscious. Soft snores rumbled from it in time with the rising and falling of its furry form.

"Huh." Mulan blinked. "Neat."

Apple Bloom's eyes were wide. "I can't believe y'all saved us!"

"I saw a bear in the circus once!" Sweetie Belle grinned.

Mulan smiled. "It's fine. Of course I wasn't going to let you get hurt."

"Well, thanks," Apple Bloom said earnestly. "I guess we should definitely take you to see the princess now."

"Yeah!" Scootaloo agreed.

"You've got red on you." Sweetie Belle pointed with a forehoof.

"Hm?" Mulan glanced down. "Oh. So I do."

Sure enough, at some point during the scuffle the bear had managed to tear through her shirt and nick the skin beneath. The cut wasn't deep or long, but a small trickle of blood had managed to leak out.

"Oh crap!" Scootaloo gasped. "How bad is it!? Are you gonna die!?"

Mulan chuckled. "No, it's fine."

"Are ya sure?" Apple Bloom leaned in to get a better look. "Forget the princess! Let's go to a hospital!"

"I'm serious, it's fine!" Mulan held her hands up placatingly. "It's just a little cut. It's not the end of the world."

Applejack was growing tired of princesses. While Twilight stayed at the castle, Rarity and Applejack had gone out to try and track down as much wayward royalty as possible. As it turned out, there were plenty of displaced princesses to worry about. On the upside, it was nice to see Rarity so happy.

"So, much, laaaace~" Rarity squeed from where she trotted amidst a gaggle of ballgown'd ladies.

The whole group moved through Ponyville, earning a few odd looks from passersby. Once the townsfolk saw Applejack and Rarity leading the procession, though, they pretty much shrugged it off as the usual strangeness.

Over the few hours they'd been searching the town, Applejack and Rarity had already managed to collect nine very confused humans. Fortunately, they were all friendly enough, especially the one with the yellow skirt who seemed almost too similar to Fluttershy. Rarity was very much enjoying fawning over inter-dimensional royalty, but Applejack was near enough ready to call it quits and head back to the castle. She was tired, she still had chores to do, and she was pretty sure they got them all. There couldn't possibly be many more than—

"Never mind..." Applejack groaned as she spotted movement near a bookstore up ahead. "Rarity! We got another one! Three o'clock!"

Rarity zipped to Applejack's side faster than she could blink, causing the farmer to flinch away slightly.

"Where!?" Rarity demanded through a far-too-wide grin.

Applejack's ears folded and she nervously pointed towards the book shop down the street.

There stood a tall woman with long brown hair and a flowing yellow dress. She seemed to be peering through the window at the shelves inside the store, while the ponyfolk gave her a wide berth. Rarity's eyes narrowed the moment she spotted her target, and in the next beat she was off like a shot.

Applejack had to clutch her hat to her head as Rarity's launch kicked up a miniature cyclone of disturbed air.

"Alrighty then," Applejack chuckled with a shake of her head.

While Rarity dragged the newest member of their group over to join the others, Applejack did a quick mental recount of everywhere they'd searched. Far as she could tell, they'd searched every bit of Ponyville high and low.

"We should be good to head on back now," Applejack called out to Rarity, who by now had once again immersed herself in the group of well dressed royalty. They all seemed slightly weirded out by Rarity's enthusiasm, but none of them seemed to have the heart to say anything.

Rarity extricated herself, then looked over at Applejack with a pout. "We're finished? No more?"

"No more," Applejack confirmed with a shake of her head. "Not unless they find us."

"Oh hey look! More of these things!" a scratchy voice echoed down the road.

Applejack and Rarity both glanced towards the source in confusion.

Rainbow Dash waved over to Applejack and Rarity from a distance down the street. Next to her was another human. This one was dressed in a simple blue skirt, black top, and long blue sleeves. Her red hair was done up in pigtails, and had a white streak running through it.

Applejack gestured for the crowd of princesses to wait behind, who all immediately went back to ogling over their surroundings and the numerous adorable townsfolk. With Rarity following, Applejack then trotted over to meet Rainbow and the human halfway.

As they reached each other, Rarity raised one eyebrow. "Rainbow Dash? Who's this?"

"This is my cool new friend!" Rainbow gestured to the woman.

"Hello, my name is Anna." Anna spotted the curious crowd down the road, and tilted her head. "Uh... who are all those people?"

"It's a long story," Applejack deadpanned.

"Now hold on." Rarity raised a hoof. "That wouldn't happen to be Princess Anna, would it?"

Anna blinked. "Yes, actually. Princess Anna of Arendelle. How did you know?"

Rarity giggled. "Lucky guess," she said with a wave of her hoof.

Applejack rolled her eyes, then turned to Rainbow Dash. "So where'd you find this one?"

Rainbow opened her mouth to speak, but before she could, Anna interjected.

"Oh, I just sorta woke up in the middle of this field. Crazy right? And then Rainbow shows up out of nowhere, and she was just so adorable, and so I—"

Rainbow Dash coughed loudly, cutting the story off. Anna looked over at her, and Rainbow was giving her a long hard look.

"Uh..." Anna fidgeted. "On second thought, how about Rainbow tells the story? She does it way better."

"What a great idea, Anna!" Rainbow exclaimed happily.

Applejack and Rarity sighed.

"Alright, strap in, girls 'cause this is one crazy ride!"

Crash!

Rainbow Dash exploded out the front door of her house with the ferocity of an caged tiger. Or maybe an uncaged tiger. Whichever one was more ferocious. She surveyed the landscape around her with a cool expression, her mane billowing dramatically in the high-altitude breeze.

After several seconds of just standing on her porch and looking cool, Rainbow leapt into the air and front-flipped towards the plans below. Just meters above the hard, unforgiving ground, her wings shot open in an explosion of blue feathers. Rainbow pulled up with inches to spare, close enough to feel the tall grass brush against her fuzzy blue belly.

She sped around the fields, performing loops and spins and barrel rolls for a few minutes just to warm up and stretch her wings. After what could only be described as a spectacular scene of athletic prowess, she touched down in a slide that kicked up dirt and torn flowers into the air.

Sweat on her coat glinted in the dawn's sunlight as Rainbow paused to catch her breath. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, enjoying the relative serenity of the moment. When she opened them, Rainbow spotted a flicker of movement in the treeline. Something lanky and tall was running around at the edge of the field.

"What the...?" Rainbow muttered under her breath.

Whatever it was, it didn't look like a pony. It didn't look like anything she'd ever seen. Bravely, Rainbow decided to investigate. She cracked her neck and took to the air. In a few beats of her powerful wings, she was already approaching the strange creature.

The thing was tall, much taller than any pony, and was wearing a dress for some reason. Whatever it was seemed to be fascinated by the wildlife, as it was chasing birds and bunnies around the trees. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes at the sight.

"Hey, you!" Rainbow called out to the stranger.

The stranger stopped to look up at Rainbow's approaching figure, and immediately froze.

Rainbow touched down in the dew-laden grass and trotted closer. "Yeah, you. Just what are you, and how did you—"

She cut off with a startled squeak as the stranger was suddenly inches from her face. Rainbow's wings flared out in surprise and she took a half-step backwards.

"Oh my gosh!" the stranger exclaimed. "You are so adorable!"

Rainbow stood up straight, then paused. "Uh... thanks?"

The stranger reached a hand towards Rainbow's mane, but Rainbow batted it away.

"Hey, you gonna answer my question or what?"

"What?"

"I, ugh..." Rainbow groaned. "What are you? Where did you come from?"

"Oh, I'm sorry." The stranger blushed. "This is all just so new and exciting... and cute. Ahem. My name is Anna. I come from Arandelle. I don't actually know how I ended up here. I just sort of... woke up in this field. I don't even know where I am."

"Huh..." Rainbow blinked. "Neat! I'm Rainbow Dash, and this is Equestria."

Anna slowly nodded. "Neat."

There was a long moment of silence. Rainbow was smiling, Anna was smiling, and both Rarity and Applejack looked mildly confused.

Finally, Applejack whistled and said, "That it? Colour me impressed, Rainbow Dash. Figured you would've embellished it a mite more."

"I'm inclined to agree, darling. The opening was just a tad... over-descriptive, but you kept it concise and—"

"Wait I'm not done yet!" Rainbow suddenly exclaimed.

Applejack threw her hat.

"So you seem pretty cool, Anna."

"Uh, thanks, Rainbow." Anna smiled. "You seem pretty cool too."

"I know." Rainbow tossed her mane. "Anyway, if anypony could help us figure out what happened to get you here, it'd be Princess Twilight. She's, like, super smart and whatever."

Anna nodded. "Alright. Can... uh... can we go see her now?" She fidgeted with one of her pigtails. "It's very beautiful here and stuff, but I think I'd like to go home."

Rainbow Dash nodded. "No problem. She should be in her castle. Never leaves the place really."

"I know what that's like..."

"Oh... kay." Rainbow squinted. "Anywhoo, let's go then. Follow me and I'll lead you—look out!"

Rainbow dove forward and tackled Anna to the side. Both of them tumbled across the grass and came to rest in a heap.

Anna groaned. "Ow. What was that for?"

"Look!" Rainbow Dash pointed to where Anna had been standing moments before. A deadly wooden arrow tipped with razor-sharp steel and probably poison was embedded into a tree trunk. If Anna had been standing there, she would've been skewered.

"Whoa," Anna uttered, eyes wide. "You saved my life! Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet," Rainbow said as she stood back up. "I've got a bad feeling about this."

Anna pushed up to her feet and tossed a sidelong look Rainbow's way. "Why do I feel like I should slap you after that line?"

What surely would've been a brilliant retort by Rainbow was cut off before it started as several shadowy figures suddenly appeared in the field before them.

Rainbow Dash gasped. "Ninjas!" She spat to the side. "Pony ninjas. I hate those."

Anna took a step backwards. "Wh-Where did they come from?"

"They're ninjas. They do that."

"Rainbow Dash!" The lead ninja shouted dramatically. "We've come to beat you up for being too awesome! Also your cool friend Anna, who has nice hair and her dress is really pretty."

"You'll never harm us, or Anna's super beautiful shimmery dress—your words not mine!" Rainbow Dash heroically retorted.

Anna stepped up and stood by Rainbow's side. "Yeah!" she added. "I am very confused!"

As the ninjas formed a perimeter around the two brave souls, Rainbow leaned towards Anna and whispered, "Do you know how to fight? I'm pretty sure these guys aren't here to sell Blank-Flank 182 t-shirts."

Anna nodded and whispered back, "I threw a snowball at a giant monster once, and another time I blocked a sword with my face. Also your mane is very pretty."

"Good enough." Rainbow nodded. "Also thank you."

Anna and Rainbow settled into fighting stances. Rainbow spread her wings and licked her lips. Anna hiked up her long skirt. They were surrounded now, and there were more black-suited ninjas than either of them cared to count.

"Enough waiting around!" The lead ninja exclaimed suddenly. He flung a forehoof towards Anna and Rainbow and shouted, "Attaaaaaack!"

The closest ninja leapt toward Rainbow Dash with a cry of "Hiyaaaaa!"

Rainbow ducked low, then gave one hard flap of her wings and brutally uppercutted the ninja. Whap! He ragdolled through the air and cartwheeled three or four times before landing in a groaning heap behind his comrades.

The clearing fell silent for a moment.

Anna leaned towards Rainbow. "I think you just made them ma—"

"Raaauuuuughh!"

The rest of the bad guys charged in all at once.

"Aw jeeze!" Rainbow barely dodged a punch aimed for her skull, then rolled across the grass and swept the legs of a random baddie. She kicked him in the stomach with both rear hooves, propelling herself forward like a blue missile. Rainbow stretched out her forehooves and used her momentum to plow into a cluster of clueless ninjas.

Smash!

Bodies sailed in all directions, leaving Rainbow standing triumphantly in a tiny clear space.

"Hah! Strike!" She grinned. "Who's next?"

Meanwhile, Anna was contending with several enemies of her own. A ninja sprinted at her, winding up for a haymaker, but Anna saw him coming and planted one foot on the ground. The moment the stallion was in range, Anna spun into a reverse heel kick straight into his jaw. Teeth and spittle followed the unconscious ninja in a spinning arc over the heads of several more enemies.

Before she could congratulate herself, another ninja came charging in with a katana. Anna jumped backwards to avoid the swing, but the front of her skirt ended up sliced right across. With a click of her teeth, Anna grabbed the damaged garment and tore off the entire lower half. With the fabric in both hands, she squared off with the katana-wielding ninja.

The ninja charged her with reckless abandon. Anna ducked one swing, and jumped over another. She juked past an attempt to skewer her, and in a flash she wrapped the fabric around the blade of the sword. Anna then planted both feet and wrenched it from the ninja's grasp. The weapon spun through the air and stabbed itself deep into a tree.

Thunk!

The ninja stared after its lost weapon with a tiny whimper, then remembered it was supposed to be fighting. Before he could spin to face Anna, her fist collided meatedly with the back of his skull. The ninja flopped face-first into the grass and lay still.

Anna wasn't given a chance to breathe, as several more enemies closed in on her. She deflected a flying punch and retaliated with an elbow to the gut. One ninja managed to kick her in the back of the knee, and Anna collapsed forward onto her hands. She kicked out behind her and sent the offender flipping through the air into the hard trunk of another tree.

Bam!

In the meanwhile, another ninja capitalized on the opportunity and charged her from the front. The ninja threw both forehooves around her neck in a vicious headlock, and Anna batted at him desperately.

Rainbow Dash saw this from afar. "Anna!" She cried out, then paused to deliver one last punch to a mostly-unconscious ninja on the ground.

The pegasus flapped her wings and tried to make it to her new friend, but several more ninjas blocked her path. She growled like a wild beast and charged them. Wham! One received a bicycle kick to the chin. She delivered a flurry of rapid punches to the next one, only for one to try and sneak up on her. She slapped him across the face with her tail, then spun around and grabbed him about the waist with both hooves.

"Rrrrrraaaaugh!" Rainbow screamed and suplexed the stallion so hard that the ground shook.

Thud!

Anna felt it, and she felt a fire build up inside her. The stallion holding her neck felt her struggles increase. His eyes went wide. In the next moment, Anna grabbed his hips, kicked off with her legs, and performed a flawless sunset flip that drove his head right into the dirt.

"Woo!" Rainbow cheered. "No one anticipates the sunset flip!"

Anna stood up and smirked proudly, but then her eyes widened. "Look out behind you!"

"Huh?" Rainbow Dash turned around and saw two ninjas running straight at her. "Oh I don't think so, buddies! Anna, catch!"

Rainbow grabbed the first stallion by the shoulders and redirected his own momentum until he was running helplessly towards Anna at full speed. Anna jumped into the air and wrought a savage drop kick upon his face.

"Htt!"

Pow!

The ninja backflipped in place and landed in the grass with a low groan. Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash jumped into the air with a flap of her wings and came down with a flying elbow drop to the other ninja's spine.

Whud!

The ninja was driven face-first into the grass, and didn't get back up.

The girls didn't even have time to celebrate before more ninjas were charging in. Rainbow front-flipped into a vertical heel kick while Anna headbutted a stallion into the dirt. Teeth and ninjas flew in every direction. At some point Rainbow Dash found a metal folding chair and savagely slammed it across the heads of several ninjas. Meanwhile. Anna blocked another stallion's kick, then grabbed him by the leg, spun around twice, and hurled him straight up into the air.

"Hey, Rainbow! Alley-oop!"

Grinning madly, Rainbow saw it and took off in a flash. She met the airborne stallion two dozen feet up and tackled him about the waist. With her hooves wrapped tightly around him and his head towards the ground, Rainbow clutched her wings to her side and dropped like an anvil.

And on that day, old men wept, for the mother of all pile drivers echoed throughout their very souls.

Kra-KOW!

Dirt and plant matter flew into the air in a wide ring around the impact zone. Ninjas screamed and flailed as they were all sent flying in a massive explosion of force. Anna held a hand up to shield her face while her hair and tattered short skirt flapped in the shockwave of the explosion.

When the dust settled, Anna and Rainbow Dash were left panting for breath at the epicenter of a large dirt crater. Smoke and debris blew on a gentle breeze, and all was silent.

Anna gulped. "I think that's the last of—"

"Muahahahaha!" She was cut off by a bout of maniacal laughter.

The ground shook and rumbled, and an acrid smell filled the air. Both girls glanced at each other with wide eyes, but after a quick nod steeled their expressions and mentally prepared for whatever came next.

A loud, deep voice resonated through the clearing. "I see you dispatched my pawns without much trouble. Good! After all, this wouldn't be fun if you didn't put up some challenge."

"Oh yeah?" Rainbow Dash shouted back. "Why don't you come down here and say that to our faces, ya creep!?"

"Good one, Rainbow," Anna whispered.

"Thanks."

The voice came back a moment later. "A tempting proposition, to be sure... but no. I've got something else in store for you."

The rumbling was growing louder. Dust kicked into the air in clouds as the ground shook violently. The air felt like it was burning in their lungs.

"You must face..."

Roooaaaaarrrr!

"My army of undead cyborg dragons!"

The sky blackened with countless massive shapes. It was a writhing maelstrom of razor claws, necrotic flesh, and deadly metal augmentations that blocked out the very sun itself.

Rainbow Dash and Anna glanced at each other. They shared a wide grin.

In unison, their shout lit the air, "Bring it on!"

The dragon army dove in a shrieking wave of death, fire and plasma erupted from them in waves, and—

"Now hold on just a cotton-pickin' minute!" Applejack interjected, frowning deeply.

Rainbow Dash paused, both forehooves still raised in overly-dramatic combative gestures.

Applejack glared. "Did any of this even happen?"

Rainbow dropped her hooves to the dirt, then shrugged. "Meh, it's based on true events. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah! Blam! Crash! Grawgh! Wriii—"

Applejack quickly silenced Rainbow Dash with a firm hoof against her muzzle. While Rainbow shot her a perturbed glare, Applejack merely rolled her eyes and turned to face Anna.

"Any chance you could fill me in on what really happened?"

Anna blinked. She glanced at Rainbow Dash, and the two shared a momentary look, then she gazed back at Applejack.

"Uh, no, that's pretty much what happened."

Rainbow Dash grinned and held out a hoof, which Anna gigglingly bumped her fist against.

Applejack's hoof met her own face above a weathered sigh, but she couldn't quite hide a small grin on her muzzle. "I swear, I can't tell which of you is the bad influence..."

"Ahem, yes." Rarity interjected. "As... enlightening as that was, I do believe you ever so briefly mentioned something about going to see Twilight?"

Rainbow Dash blinked. "Oh yeah! Forgot about that part."

Anna perked up. "You wouldn't happen to know where she is, would you?"

"Matter of fact, we're on our way to see 'er right now." Applejack smirked. "Or did you think that big ol' crowd of princess-types was just a coincidence?"

"Oh cool. We'll just tag along then," Rainbow said with a satisfied nod.

"Don't you have to go be annoying somewhere else?" Applejack groaned.

Rainbow shrugged. "Not until four."

"Fine," Applejack sighed. "Let's get a move on then. This whole thing's gone on way too long alrea—"

"Hey guys!" sqeaked a chipper young voice, accompanied by three tiny sets of galloping hooves.

"Oh for cryin' out loud!"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders came to a scuffling stop next to Rarity, faces alight in beaming grins. All three of them had patches of dirt all over their coats, but looked otherwise fine.

Rarity raised an eyebrow. "Goodness! What on earth happened to you three?"

It was at that moment that Mulan caught up, and came to a panting stop. She was likewise dirty, but with the addition of a torn shirt and a slight cut across her stomach. She waved awkwardly at the adult ponies.

Rarity blinked. "Oh... I see." She turned to the human newcomer. "And you must be Princess...?"

Mulan blinked. "I'm... just Mulan." She tapped her chin. "Although I guess I did technically marry a prince, so—"

"Right! That's it! Let's go!" Applejack whirled about and began marching firmly down the road towards the rest of the princesses and the castle.

"H-Huh?" Apple Bloom scampered after her older sister. "But Applejack! Don'tcha wanna know where we've been?"

"Not really. I just wanna never hear the word 'princess' again for as long as I live."

"But there was a bear!"

"It was so cool!" Scootaloo added, wings abuzz.

"And Mulan was awesome!" Apple Bloom said gleefully.

"I ate a bug!"

Both Crusaders stopped and turned to stare at Sweetie Belle.

"What?"

"Look, girls." Applejack paused only briefly to rub her temples. "That all sounds mighty exciting, but I'm afraid I'm all excited-out for the day. Things have been even weirder than usual... and that's sayin' something."

They passed on by the crowd of gathered royalty, who all fell into step behind. However, just as soon as they spotted Rainbow Dash, all of the princesses flocked over to her and instantly began fawning over her.

"She's so prettyyyy~"

"I love her mane!"

"Look at those adorable little wings!"

Rarity watched the display with a deep, deep frown.

Applejack sidled up next to her, grinning like a fox. "Mmm, somepony jealous?"

Rarity scoffed. "Jealous!? Moi? I should think not! Such thoughts are below a lady." Her eyes wandered back over to the infatuated princesses and a low growl built in the back of her throat. "Even if a certain pony seems to be everyone's favourite all of a sudden..."

Applejack chuckled. "You're cute when you're jealous."

A beat.

"B-Buh?" Rarity's hooves ground to a halt in the road while her brain restarted. "Wh-What, I, you..." By that time, Applejack was chuckling her way down the road a good distance ahead. "Oh you brute! Come back here!"

The castle was clear in sight now, so while Applejack and Rarity galloped off ahead, the rest of the group maintained a normal pace. Slightly slower than normal, actually, as the many princesses tried to walk without taking their eyes of Rainbow Dash who was hovering a few feet out of reach.

They all cooed and aww'd and beckoned her down for sweet princessy snuggles.

Rainbow Dash fidgeted and fidgeted. "Uhhhhhh..." She glanced around at the many ponies wandering throughout the very public place. Rainbow winced hard. "I... uh... no way! I'm t-totally way too cool for that."

The princesses gave a collective aww of disappointment. Rainbow nearly collapsed.

"I'm gonna go... over there now. Gotta go, uh... be cool'n'stuff. Okaythanksbye!" Rainbow quickly zipped away and a good several meters behind the group, where she continued to follow on her own. She struck a confident swagger, which was only slightly ruined by the bright pink blush on her cheeks.

As they crossed the final few meters to the castle, Anna shuffled up next to Rainbow Dash in the back.

Rainbow saw her out of her corner of her eye and flinched hard. "What!? No! You! I just want to drown in your dress~"

Anna squinted. "What?"

Rainbow cleared her throat. "Uh... n-nothing! Nothing." Her voice cracked adorably. "You're cool, Anna. I'm cool. We're cool. What do you want?"

It took a couple seconds for Anna to formulate a response to that. "Uh... it's just, I haven't seen my sister anywhere here."

"Who's your sister?" Rainbow tilted her head.

"Well she's a human, obviously. Long silver ponytail, blue dress, magical ice powers." She coughed. "Sound familiar?"

Rainbow frowned. "Not even a little bit."

"Oh..." Anna scrunched up her face. "It's a little weird, don't you think? I mean, why would I get sent here and not her? She's a princess too."

"Meh." Rainbow Dash shrugged. "Probably just the author getting lazy."

"...What?"

"I invented a magical solution to all our problems while you girls were off doing stuff!" Twilight stated proudly.

"Wow! How incredibly convenient!" Rarity exclaimed, hooves to cheeks.

"See?" Rainbow Dash smirked.

Anna squinted down at the pegasus. "I still have no idea what you're talking about..."

"Alright then, Anna was it?" Applejack said.

"Hm?"

"Why don'tcha go stand with the rest of the princess-types so we can get this show on the road."

"Oh, sure!" Anna walked over to the crowd of colourful lacy gowns.

Rainbow watched her go with an intent stare. She watched Anna join in with the crowd of ballgowns and lace.

"Uhhhh," Rainbow twitched. "I'm, uh, I'm g-gonna go over there because my cool new friend did." Her eyes darted about. "And for no other reason at all."

"Oh...kay, sugarcube."

"Zoop!" Rainbow Dash zoop'd over to the crowd and instantly face-dived into a nuzzlefest of silky fabric and adoring princesses.

Applejack and Rarity walked over to Twilight, who was beaming with pride.

"Well, girls, I should be able to send them all back where they came from," Twilight said chipperly. "I presume you found them all?"

"Look, Twi," Applejack groaned, "we did our dang best, but these princesses just keep poppin' up every time we turn around."

Rarity nodded. "I say, darling, there's a whole franchise of them!"

Applejack rubbed the bridge of her muzzle with a hoof. "Can't you just, I dunno, use your fancy spell to grab 'em all up from everywhere and bring 'em all here in one fell swoop?"

Twilight blinked slowly. She blinked again. "Yes... I can. Huh." She chuckled nervously. "Boy, that would've made this whole day a lot easier, huh?"

Applejack just glared. "Just cast the spell so I can go to bed."

Rarity raised a hoof. "Darlings, where's Rainbow Dash wandered off to?"

"Oh for Pete's..." Applejack put a hoof to her lips and whistled shrilly. "Hey, Rainbow!"

Across the room, there was a rustling in the middle of a pile of seated princesses.

"H-Huh!?" Rainbow's head popped out of a heap of dresses and cuddles. "Ye-HIC-Yeah?"

"Git over here. Playtime's over."

Rainbow's ears folded, her head drooped, and her wings were dragging on the ground, but she managed to drag herself over to her friends and sit down with a sad plop.

Rarity waggled her eyebrows. "Enjoy yourself, darling?"

Applejack snickered as well. "Gotta say, Dash, never pegged you as one who wanted to be so... adorable."

Rainbow didn't look up, but her bright red blush was clear as day. "Shut up. Say what you want, it was worth it. Shut up"

"Alright, everyone!" Twilight announced to the room at large. "Before I send you all home, I need to cast the spell that brought you here one last time. That will ensure that we don't inadvertently leave anyone stranded in Equestria somewhere."

The princesses nodded and voiced vague agreement.

Twilight began gathering the magic into her horn. A spectral wind picked up and cycloned around her, whipping her mane and tail. Her horn glowed brighter and brighter, while her eyes remained tightly shut in concentration.

While this was going on, Applejack sat down next to Rarity on the sidelines. Neither spoke for a moment, but then the howling of the magical tornado died down a little bit.

Applejack took of her hat and wrung it between her hooves. "Are... are you mad at me for teasin' ya?"

Rarity glanced at Applejack, who offered an apologetic smile. Rarity couldn't help but smile back.

"No, I suppose not." Rarity playfully punched Applejack in the shoulder. "But must you insist on teasing me in front of everypony like that?"

Applejack giggled, then sighed happily. "Yeah."

Rarity leaned against Applejack's side. Applejack put one foreleg around Rarity's shoulders. The two sat in silence for a few more moments while Twilight continued to charge her magic.

"It sure was a crazy day," Applejack breathed.

"Mmm," Rarity hummed in agreement. "Crazier than usual?"

"Crazier than usual." Applejack nodded.

Rarity giggled. "Ah, but neither of us are strangers to a hard day's work. It's not the end of the world, hm?"

"No, I s'pose not."

"And just think," Rarity muttered. "All of this transpired because of one simple malfunctioning spell."

There was a moment of painful silence.

"Malfunctioning... spell..." Applejack muttered under her breath. Her brows knit together. "Hey, Twi, did you fix that whole problem with the multiverse part of your spe—"

Shoom!

Twilight's spell fired off with a bright flash of lavender light. There was an eldritch scream as reality tore itself apart at the seams, but it was over in less than a split-second. Nopony even had the chance to blink before every inch of space in their universe was filled with princess, and everypony and everyone was crushed to death under an infinite mass of ballgowns and lace.

~THE END~

Author's Note