The sea, a place of wonder of hope and of dreams but also a place of rocks and death. Two forty five is crushed right before me his eyes gaping with fear under a large rock. Move the rocks they say. To the surface then stack them overhead. One by one then two by two, build the wall keep them out. Two forty five’s thick gooey blood starts to float my way as ponies gather around to help him. I don’t though, I just keep digging up rocks and stacking them like I’m told. It’s not as often as you’d think that ponies die down here. Certainly not as often as I’d like. But death is no stranger here and the ponies who cause them no saints.
Nopony believes that anypony else has it out for them and I can’t blame them. If I could still believe it I would. I see the old paintings wrapped across all the cave walls done there by our ancestors. They were all so peaceful believing in nonviolent protest and love between species. They were wise and brimming with hope that one day we’d return home. Of course the elder ponies don’t believe such a place exists anymore. They’re always saying if there was such a place why would they have left. They only believe in here, living underground in a dark desalt cave a million miles away from any type of land but I can’t blame them for that either. If I could believe that ponies were meant to live under ground I would, sure would make my life here a lot easier then it is. The medic comes, Pearl. She’s as white as a clam when she sees the twisted body. I just keep stacking and try to ignore all the noise. “Uh- get me some seaweed!” She shouts at nopony in particular. Pearl hesitates to touch the body as ponies go swimming in all directions. She looks at me, she has to, I was the only one near by when it happened.
“Did you see what happened!?” I try not to stare at her but I can’t seem to look away. Pearl is such a sad creature. Lived her whole life underwater without complaint for years and all she ever wanted to do was be a teacher. One word from the Order otherwise and she was put on death watch. She wasn’t made for this type of work and it showed cruelly on her face. The dark rings of oily black that hanged around her eyes. Her mouth seemed to ache with fear. And her unusually jagged mane was broken in several places from her constantly brushing it back in frustration. She would have made such a good teacher too. I tell Pearl about the elder pony who pushed the rocks onto Sprinkle Splash. Of course she doesn't believe me.
“That isn’t funny Stormy! A pony died here today. Don’t you even care? Do any of our lives matter to you!?” I don't talk much after that. If anypony other then Pearl had heard me spouting off such blasphemy I would be reported again and there after punished.
I don't mind being shut out from everypony else that much. Nopony else ever really believed me about these things and I would never stop telling them, so there was nothing really for us to talk about. Pearl went out with the others to feed his body to the sea monsters and the work day ended. That was the good part about somepony dying. We were let off from work early to grieve witch was all of us getting together to talk about the pony that died.
By the time I got there the get together was already in full swing. Every pony and their foals had gathered around in remembrance of him. As I scan the space for familiar faces I spot Wave Dancer huddled under a blanket seemingly talking about Splash to a small crowd of ponies; I recognize as Sea light, Sting Ray, Sea Weed, the twins High Tide and Low Tide and Sand Dollar an older but relatable mare. I swim over as they are the only ponies nice enough to put up with me. After Wave Dancer finishes his part about rock safety High Tide begins to say his peace. High Tide and Low Tide are the youngest of the group. They hitched themselves to Pearl after their mother died in a cave in. Being the soul survivors of an incident that killed nearly twenty ponies they get a lot of sympathy and attention from others. So when High Tide opens his mouth everypony listens.
“I get what Wave Dancer is trying to say. We need to be more careful.”
It isn’t long before Low Tide is talking too.
“Yeah. We need like a buddy system so when somepony gets hurt they can let everypony else know to help” I roll my eyes as everypony else all nods in agreement to this new idiotic plan. I want to tell them that I was there and that it didn’t stop him from being dead but somepony beats me to it. A voice cuts through the small group and immediately I know who it is. I sigh as Pearl pulls up beside me bloody surgical mask and all.
“Stormy Seas was there. Weren’t you Stormy?” I can tell by her patronizing tone that she had come to give me a hard time about not helping that pony. Pearl was annoying that way. Being the oldest and most experience of the group she gave herself the role of nagging mother.
“Stormy sat there and watched that pony die. It took somepony from a completely different sector to let me know that some pony was in danger.” She angrily ripped her gloves and mask off and stared at me waiting for my response. I could feel the cold stares of all the ponies around me as I sat there staring at my tail. Finally Wave Dancer spoke up.
“I-always knew you were disturbed Stormster but I never thought-” I didn't wait for him to finish. As I swam away the silence followed me.
I had never cared about other ponies, they knew that I was cold in that way but I had also never watched one die. Was it true? Had I become too disturbed even for them? The answer didn’t matter, regardless of the truth I could never go back to them. They would never accept me after what I did or rather what I didn't do, I convinced myself that it was bound to happen one day and laid down on the seafloor in my room. As I lay there the scenario played over and over in my head. His death seemed so minuscule at that moment I could hardly believe the weight of it now. He was nothing, a nopony whose only recognizable trait was his number. The word number lingered over me like a broken stalagmite. Was that really all I thought of him? A number among the thousands? I turned over pressing my tummy against the cold stone. I had become sick with guilt. It had never mattered before. When something went wrong I could always tell myself that I didn’t care and that they were the lucky ones but lately things had been different. As I laid there trapped in thought I felt a familiar twinge in my side. I looked down despite myself to find my book lying cover up on the floor beside me. I picked it up and turned back over holding it above me, the feel of it’s pages against my hooves made me prickle with excitement. This book meant more to me then I could say with words yet I hated it. It was the reason for my misery, the reason nopony liked me and the reason I would forever be alone.
My father use to be apart of the Order. Before he died he gave me this book and told me to hold onto it no matter what. We had never been very close so I assumed it was some halfhearted attempt to make amends for never being there for me as a filly but as I read on it was clear it was much more then that. Every page seemed to be scrawled In the same shaky muzzel writing. It spoke the truth about the Order and the atrocities they had committed, all in the name of keeping the masses safe. The Order had a rule that all transactions formal or otherwise was to be documented. In an effort to quiet suspicion they included their own explorations as reassurance that the rule was in the best interest of all the ponies that live here. However we aren’t allowed to read the reports made by the Order. No pony except members of the Order are allowed to read reports from any sector and all reports made by the Order are destroyed within the following days. The book contained all of the documents that my father had collected throughout the years. All of the forgotten paper trail that had slipped under the radar. Death orders, pony sacrifices, and lastly but most disturbingly the control of the population. It was something that even I wouldn’t dare talk about with anypony else. It was true I could expose the Order with the papers I had but it didn’t matter. No pony would believe me regardless of the evidence. I had the mark of a traitor and every pony knew it.
The next day work began early to make up for lost time. I was stationed in the far north of the caverns to limit questions about the incident. The worker who came to restation me told me that it was to help the healing process but I knew it was to keep ponies from asking too many unwanted question as well as keep an eye on me. There was an extra surprise as the pony I had followed didn’t leave but instead continued to watch me. I worked diligently watching him from the corner of my eye. I had expected him to do something seemingly malicious like offer me an unscheduled ration or disappear for a while but instead he sat there content with his work. I recognized him as Coral Blue one of the many ponies with aspirations of joining the hierarchy of the Order. His bright beaming smile and and reassuring eyes hung dull on me but it didn’t stop him from taking the usual reassuring tone the higher ups seemed to keep around us.
“ So I heard you were there when that pony died. What was his name?” My stomach turned with nervousness, it wasn’t often that ponies like him spoke to us and when it did happen you could be sure that their was an apparent reason. There didn’t appear to be a real threat here though. Coral Blue was not a very intimidating pony. His cutie mark was what other ponies would call a luxury item. Something that wasn’t needed in this new civilization. His special talent was jewelry making, though it didn’t matter much here it was still represented proudly on his flank in the form of one tasteful shiny blue necklace. Ponies like him often looked for purpose in the Order. Proving their usefulness seemingly their main purpose in life now. I quickly reminded him that it was Sprinkle Splash that had been crushed, forgetting to refer to him by his formal title of number two forty five. Despite my misstep he recognized the name immediately and reacted.
“ Oh Yeah! Sprinkle Splash.” He laughed warmly. “ I remember him. Such a nice pony.” I sighed roughly. It was clear where this conversation would end.
“ You don’t agree Stormy?” He asked, the sound of my name made my headache but I didn’t answer. He spoke again his voice lower now.
“I heard what happened. and I heard what you said to Pearl.” He added harshly. I tried to focus on stacking the rocks on the cart but kept making mistakes. What had I said to Pearl? For whatever reason be it fear or lack of concentration I couldn’t remember. As he swam slowly over I could feel the heat growing in my stomach. I wasn’t afraid of him but I was afraid of death. I knew that being punished was a possibility but I had always told myself that I would be brave enough to face it when it came. I was wrong. He placed his hoof on my shoulder and my whole body tensed.
" I know it's been hard since your dad passed but he died for a reason." He stopped as if to make certain I was listening. "He was a traitor Stormy." He said sympathetically. "I would hate to think you were too."
I stared down at the rocks pushing a few of them around with my tail wishing I was anywhere else but here. "Are you a traitor Stormy?"
The questioned rang hollow in my head. The sound of it painful to the ear. I didn't know what to say. My father was brave. He had given every fiber of his being to the Order and then in one move sacrificed it all to bring it down. No matter how unsuccessful his fight he never gave in. He was brave and a traitor, so I guess I am too. It was clear that I wouldn't be able to leave without a strait answer and a yes meant instant death. I struggled with the decision. Deny my feelings twords the Order and cement myself as a loyal follower or die, possibly by the hooves of a jewelry making nopony. I made my decision. I told him that I would never do anything to endanger any pony else's life. Seemingly pleased with my answer he backed away.
" I knew you were a good one." he smiled. I didn't smile back. When my eyes finally meet his I could tell he was ready to kill me if my answer had been anything but no. For ponies who craved to be apart of the higher ups killing a traitor was a chance they would not soon pass up. He slithered off like a sea snake still sporting his careless smile. It wasn't until he droped it that I noticed he had been holding a large rock the whole time. It was ponies like him that made me weary to share what I knew with others. The only reason I could vent to Pearl was because I knew she hated the Order as much as I did. Though she tried to hide it I could see the daggers shine in her eyes when she looked at the ponies responsible for her station. It was more then hate. It was a desire for justice. The type of justice that only the vengeful death of those ponies could get you.
