Shards of the fourth wall

DISCLAIMER! I DO NOT, IN ANY WAY OWN MY LITTLE PONY FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC.

It really sucks.

                     Authors note: Some of the chapters will be switching between 1st and 3rd person.

                     Everyday was a day of misery and boredom. When the Elements of Harmony sealed him to stone, Princess Celestia thought it would seem like yesterday to him. But no, he had to live each boring day imprisoned in a lump of rock! All the little ponies went by, attending to business, whilst Discord was made to wait insufferably long til he had enough power regained to break out.

                      Suddenly, he felt a disturbance in the force. Really? He thought. Star wars references are no good unless someone hears you make them. But there was something wrong with Equestria. He could feel it in his mismatched bones. Something big and powerful which might change the fate of all Equestria.

                      Enough power to help him break free.

                      He cackled mentally, and started to formulate his plan.

                     Derpy Hooves did not look happy.

                     Everything had gone wrong in one day. She'd just went to Sugarcube corner to get some muffins, but then was whisked away on a magical adventure to save Equestria. Not that she didn't do that with the Doctor.

                     Speaking of the Doctor, she glanced over to see him and Anne deep in conversation. Anne was the strangest thing she'd ever seen. She was bipedal, like a Diamond Dog, but had no fur except from her mane. The mane was short and ginger, with brown strips going through it. Her skin was milk-white, dotted with pale orange freckles. She was roughly 5ft 10, which was high for pony standards. Even Princess Celestia, tallest of them all, was about 4 feet. Anne's eyes were muddy green, and quite small compared to pony eyes. Derpy couldn't see what the Doctor saw in her.

                     Wait, was she jealous? Why? Derpy had never been jealous of anything in her life. Was it to do with the Doctor? He was quite important to her, but why was his being with the "Human" make her green with envy?

                     Still wondering about the answers to those questions, she trotted slowly over to where they were chatting.

                    "Hey, guys. Princess Celestia should be pulling us out of the warp hole any minute now," Twilight called from the back. Anne looked up and saw Derpy moving towards them. She motioned for her to join them with a small smile.

                    "Hi, Derpy," She said amiably. "How the hell are ya?" Derpy raised one eyebrow as she heard the rude word, but none-the-less answered, "Fine. How might you two be?"

                    Anne grinned broadly at her attempt to be sociable. "Do you normally talk like that?"

                    "No. I just thought because you are a stranger to our land, I should treat you with repute."

                    At that, the Doctor decided to jump in. " I think what my colleague is trying to say is that they always welcome newcomers kindly and respectfully." Derpy shot him a look.

                    "That is what I meant, Doctor. I am quite sure our guest here would understand my confabulations," she continued.

                    Anne's eyes widened. "You have a big vocabulary, Miss. Hooves."

                     Derpy smiled a bittersweet smile and asked, "So, pardon me for asking, what events are you two discussing about?"

                    "Well, Miss Hooves," Anne responded, "We are conferring about our current predicament and how it might disturb the peaceful activity of your homeland." HAH! Two can play that game! Doctor Whooves just sighed with obvious dread. A vocabulary talk-off between those two was sure to end in disaster. Just then, a regal voice yelled, "WE HAVE ARRIVED!"

                    As the wormhole unceremoniously dumped them on the ground, the group stood up and looked around. They appeared to be standing on a large wasteland. There was nopony to be seen for miles around.  The sky was white, but there were no clouds.

                    "Is-Is this Equestria? Or Earth?" Anne asked hesitantly.

                     "It is, technically, both, " Princess Celestia answered. All the ponies looked around, confused, except for one brown stallion who just looked alarmed.

                    "If the cracks consume Earth and Equestria, they'll merge together. But magic and technology isn't meant to mix. If so, it creates barren wastelands. This is why I banned all technological items, except from old-fashioned things such as the video player. It will wipe out all life, forcing the two dimensions into eachover, destroying anything and everything."

                    Everypony gasped, their eyes taking in the true nature of the wasteland. Dead ponies and humans lay dead on they floor, some missing body parts and some which had exploded.

                     "But Princess Celestia," Applejack began. "If we're in this barren wasteland, why ain't we dead? If what ya said was right, shouldn't there be no air here?"

                    Celestia nodded her head. "I have created a little bubble around us, providing us with oxygen. However, I will not be able to keep it up for more than a few minutes, so we must return to the present."

                    With that, her horn flashed a brilliant golden colour and they were sucked back into the wormhole.

                    "Hey, AJ?" Came a tentative voice from the corner. Applejack turned round to see it was Pinkie. Her mane was still deflated and she still had the greyish colour about her coat.

                     "Yeah, Pinkie?"

                    "What happens if we... if we fail?" Pinkie sniffed. AJ walked over to comfort her.

                    "Listen up sugarcube. We won't fail. We'll find the "Elements o' Discord. We'll straighten out Equestria and Earth. Ah promise."

                    "Pinkie promise?"

                     "Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," AJ recited. She mimed the actions too, remembering to close her eye before sticking her hoof in it.

                     "For if I lie to Pinkie Pie, I'd better kiss my flank goodbye," another voice came. AJ and Pinkie turned their heads to see Anne smiling at them. They grinned back, and Pinkie's mane had half-turned poofy again. Anne walked over and asked, "So I heard your parties are rock on!"

                     Pinkie Pie gasped loudly, then began in detail of the types of parties she did.

                     AJ sighed. "This here's gone be a loooong day."