The Human's Harem

by Wham

Rating: mature
Tags: Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Comedy, Romance, Sex
Length: 8679

A young woman finds herself in a Rule 63'd Equestria

Janet, a 19 year old girl, has landed in a strange land. The land is inhabited by many strange creatures, though some seem very familiar. Watch as she becomes an idol towards the male inhabitants of the land, and the bane of the females. She will discover things about herself, this world, and the unfortunate fate of humanity.

Published 2016-08-10 22:00:11 UTC
Last updated 2021-07-02 04:29:36 UTC

Bumpy Beginnings

Author's Note

Here we go, the beginning of the rewrite. You never know how hard it is to rewrite something until you actually have to do it.

I've been busy lately with doing absolutely nothing because now no one is hiring anyone with my degree. Who'd of thought it'd be hard to get a job with a BS in finance and a minor in insurance. Anyways, as it turns out, this virus has kind of ruined the market for people with my degree, making it worthless. Isn't that the worst? You get a good degree, then it almost instantly becomes useless because of something like this. Welp, now I'm taking an online IT certification course so I can, hopefully, get some form of job.

Anyways, please leave a comment on what you thought. The only way for me to get better is from some good old fashioned constructive criticism.

Bumpy Beginnings

“It’s freezing,” the young woman mutters to herself, her breath a hazy fog that clouded her eyes. She pulls her arms tight against her body and rubs her arms in a futile attempt to heat herself with the friction. “I wish I had a blanket or something.”

The woman highly regret taking that bath in the river she found. After days of walking in the forest, she decided to clean off a strange white powder that coated her body. When looking into the water, she had an uneasy feeling from its light blue hue clashing with the dark green moss at the bottom. The reflection of her by the water made her do a double take. Her strawberry blonde hair was matted and caked in dirt and white powder. Her blue eyes no longer shone with a bright brilliance exuding intelligence, life, and beauty, but instead were dull and tired.

As she finished clothing herself, after her bath, she slipped and fell back into the river, getting all her clothing wet.

In her wandering, she got cuts and scrapes along her body and tears on her clothing. Her clothing, now in tatters, were barely doing the job of keeping her warm. The vines and branches, that draped themselves between the trees, had really done a number on her clothing.

Her shoes and socks were gone. She lost them in a swampy puddle. Each step felt as if it was tearing a hole her soles or ripping the padding from the balls of her feet. She now limped her way through the forest.

“Do I have anything to numb this pain?” The woman questioned herself as she looked into her backpack.

The only thing on her person is the backpack itself that used to have snacks in it, but some animals must have taken them when she went to bathe. All that’s left inside is her laptop, some books, and first aid kit. This is truly a miserable experience for the young woman.

“I can’t just wallow in self-pity; I need to find a way out of this forest and contact my parents.” She soldiered on and thought to herself, ‘but how do I do that? This place is weird enough as it is.’

Looking up; the sunlight shines through the treetop canopy leaving flecks of light to illuminate parts of her form. ‘I probably shouldn’t try to climb again. Maybe I should put my clothes somewhere to dry.’

The time spent searching for the right place to dry her clothes was immeasurable. The sun was noticeably lower; but the woman found a rock baking in the sun. ‘The perfect place to dry my clothes.’

Seeing as the sun was still setting, she saw it best to start a fire. There were dry sticks surrounding her, making it easy to gather materials. The sticks were piled together and lit on fire using rubbing alcohol and a lighter she found inside her first-aid kit. The fire was warm and dried out the woman’s flesh and clothing. It was a bright beacon of light in the dimming forest, keeping whatever creatures that lurked about at bay … mostly.

‘Things are really looking up,’ the woman thought to herself. ‘Now all I need to do is find some food. But I can’t just go around naked.’ She looked around her and noticed how big the leaves on the trees were. ‘Perfect.’ She tried jumping up to a low branch on the one of the trees, only to be hit by her breasts on the way down.

“OW! I can’t believe I hit my face with my tits.” She rubbed her face. “I really hope I don’t get a black eye from that. And I really hope this won’t leave me with a sore back in the future.”

She continued her jumping in a, seemingly, fruitless attempt to get on the tree, but this time she used one arm to hold her breasts down. It took her a few minutes of jumping, and her legs tiring out, to figure out she couldn’t gain the height she needed. But then she thought of a brilliant idea.

“I can climb the tree … by hugging it really hard … Wait, I said I shouldn’t try to climb again.” She briefly thought about this, “screw it.” The woman wrapped her arms and legs around the tree and squeezed as hard as she could. She slowly inched her way up the trunk; her body gaining small scratches from the bark.

Upon reaching a low branch, she ceased her infantile climbing technique and latched onto the branch. The leaves she coveted were within reach. Slowly, she grew ever closer to the leaves, but it was not meant to be. Her weight was misplaced, and the branch snapped like a twig, the woman plummeted to the ground. It wasn’t a long plummet, only a few seconds, but enough to hurt her, nonetheless.

She sat and sulked by the fire, too preoccupied with the throbbing pain in her right shoulder, what she landed on, to notice what was happening around her. Without her noticing, she had been surrounded by creatures that kept themselves hidden.

The air was still and the forest quiet, the woman had spaced out and blankly stared at the fire before her. All she could hear was the fire crackling, until she heard some rustling from a bush beside her. She paid it almost no mind and was, mentally, drifting off the planet once again into an empty space that knew no time or matter. Where there were no rules.

There was a loud roar, and five wolves of wood sprung from their hiding spots, surrounding the woman. The sight, sound, and smell of the creatures almost causing no reaction. It took several seconds before her mind placed itself back into her body and she was conscious of the real world. As luck would have it, these wolves were not experienced with the creature she was, nor with prey that didn’t try to run. They remained cautious. If this strange creature barely reacted to their presence, then it must not fear them. If it does not fear the pack, then it might be capable of fighting or luring them into a trap.

This was not the case, however. Her mouth was open in awe and confusion at how such creatures could exist. Once she had realized how these beasts had surrounded her, she briefly froze. The woman, ever so slowly, pulled herself to the fire. The wolves’ curiosity and caution were waning, replacing itself with hunger. They were becoming bolder and closing in on the terrified woman.

‘Maybe I can scare them away with the fire,’ she thought to herself. Her foot touched a twig in the fire, she grabbed it with her toes and brought it to her hands.

She stood, took a deep breath, and shouted. “EAT FIRE BITCH!” She swung the fire at the wolves, some catching fire and screeching in pain as heir wooden bodies are burned to charcoal. The wolves scattered and gave the woman a wider birth.

Taking this opportunity, she ran; leaving her clothes and, almost, leaving her backpack behind. Her breasts jostled to such a degree, she had to hold them down with both her arms to keep herself safe.

She ran as fast as her feet could carry her, ignoring the cuts on her body and soles and the pain they caused. She could make out the sounds of the wolves regrouping and giving chase behind her. The sound bringing forth feelings of dread that pushed her further than she thought possible.

Her heart beat so loud it was audible to everything within her close proximity; the very action of blood rushing through her veins was deafening to her. Her eyes couldn’t properly process where she was going, nor could she react in time to stop herself from catching her foot on a protruding root and slamming to the ground. Her ankle had popped and been sprained, leaving her, practically, immobile. Her attempts to crawl were fruitless and in vain as she couldn’t muster the strength to do so.

She thought all was lost, that she had met her end, but nothing came. She waited long enough for her heart to calm, granting her the sense of hearing once more. The sound of the wolves were gone. There were words spoken in some unknown language, and the sounds of hooves on the ground. She looked up and saw yet another creature that made her drop her jaw in awe and confusion. It was a green unicorn with a green mane with white streaks.

The mysterious unicorn seemed to be in disbelief at what it was looking at. The woman waved and tried to make contact with the creature. Given her current level of exhaustion, most of what she said came as a wheeze between whatever breaths she could muster.

“Hi. I’m Janette.” The woman received a strange look from the unicorn. Given her current location on the ground, she could conclude it was male. His face wore a look of shock and excitement. He opened his mouth, but then the world went dark as she succumbed to her exhaustion and injuries.

“Well that’s unfortunate.” Harpo, the unicorn, pouted. He thought hard about what he should do. “Who knows what would happen if the rest of Ponyville knew a real living human had been found. There could be riots. Maybe I should take her home.” He briefly grew a smile on his face.

His horn glowed and the woman was lifted into the air.

“Wait. What if Praline finds her? He’s not too keen on houseguests.” He stood in place and thought hard of what he could do. “I know, the attic,” he excitedly chirped. “Nopony ever goes into the attic. I can keep her there until she’s healed, and maybe learn more about her. Maybe, given time, I can even begin to introduce her to the rest of town.”

Harpo made his way out of the forest, the woman floating behind him. He hummed a tune to himself, a large toothy grin plastered on his face. There was a skip in his step. The thought of what he could learn from her was all that occupied his mind.

“I’m so glad I decided to go for a walk in the Everfree. It’s like it was meant to be.”

In almost no time, the unicorn had, stealthily, made his way home and stuffed Janette into his attic. He lay food, water, and bedding close to where she rested, and began the work of repairing her body.

Harpo's House

Author's Note

Sorry it's been awhile. Few things, my laptop's been having problems. I use my laptop for writing and it's been having problems where it just forgets it has a keyboard directly attached to it. Thought it was a driver issue, turned out to be both driver and hardware. This laptop has been a lot of trouble ever since I got it. Anyways, I've also gotten a job that's both physically and mentally demanding so when I would usually go to write, my brain turns to mush. I blame myself for this, I need to figure out a good schedule for this kind of thing and stop being so distracted. The only reason I managed to finish this chapter is because I was banished from my place of residence for having covid and stayed at my grandfathers condo for two weeks with no t/v, games, books, people, and a lackluster internet.

Now that I'm back from quarantine I've figured out a better schedule than before, but still not that good, and I can at least get to doing this for a bit a day. This chapter is gonna be lackluster, I haven't had much time to practice writing so I'm a bit out of touch with it and I'm getting back into it. So expect this chapter, and maybe the next few, to be around the level of the old version of the chapters. On the plus side, I've gotten much better at drawing. Because of the new schedule I figured out the next chapter won't take a year to come out. Again, sorry about that, completely my fault about it taking so long, it's still strange rewriting things and it's really different from just writing. I also forgot how hard it is to write in the first person, especially when the only characters in the chapter can't communicate with each other and carry a conversation.

Harpo's House

I awoke to the sight of a flickering candle and a small pony atop my body. Taking note of my body, I’ve been both cleaned and healed. I’m still quite hungry though. My body feels the warmth from the pony sprawled across it.

I would have let him continue to rest if it weren’t for the feeling of a particular part of his anatomy coming awfully close to mine. I decided it was time for him to wake up.

I push his body off me, and he stumbled to stand as I back away from him. He looks both shocked and tired as he yawns and rubs the sleep from his eyes.

He looks around the room, and I do the same. On the walls are posters. Some posters have winged ponies flying through the skies while some have things like Jimmie Hendrix on them. Rather confusing and I can feel a tonal dissonance.

There were boxes with strange writing on them sat next to a bookcase filled with books with the same writing on their spine. Some books though had English on them.

I hear a sound and turn to the pony, who started talking in, what I assume, is the language on the books. I can’t understand him, but he is pointing at me.

I look down to find I’m still naked … This is awkward. I hurriedly move my hand to cover my breasts bend my knees inwards to cover my crotch; but then realize it doesn’t really matter. He was sleeping on me naked and carried me home while naked; it’s not like there’s nothing he hasn’t been looking at the whole time I was out.

He slowly makes his way to me; head and ears low. Once he’s less than a foot from me, my free hand begins to glow; it was the same color as the glowing around the small unicorn’s horn. I can only assume they’re both related somehow.

My hand moves, not of my own accord, towards the small unicorn. He looks over my hand and fingers then gives them a sniff. His sniff is followed by a lick, gross. He moves his eyes around my body, giving me the occasional sniff before he reaches my feet and his face morphs into an expression I can only describe as confused. He then licks them, even grosser than the hand thing.

He uses his … magic? to make drawings of my body. Each sheet has its own thing dedicated to it, one for my hands, one for my feet, another for legs, then arms, and head. My torso took three pages it seems. There were, in total, nine drawing including a portrait of my form.

The little guy has quite the artistic talent.

He puts his drawings and supplies in a strange book and makes his way to one of the walls and a thing on the ground glows.

I move towards it and on closer inspection it’s a ladder on a latch. When opened, the ladder drops and unfolds. He magics up a pitcher of water and quickly climbed down the ladder, and I made to follow him, but the ladder shot back up and the latch closed. I couldn’t open it with myself.

Seeing as I can’t make my way out of here, I decide to take another look around. I find my backpack, it’s sitting in a corner, and it’s mostly unharmed. There’re a few tears on it and some mud, but it’s overall immaculate in appearance.

Opening the backpack, I can find my laptop inside it, but no clothing to be seen. My laptop was completely unscathed. I like my games, couldn’t imagine leaving home without it. I guilted my parents for it. It’s a custom laptop and was really expensive, but it’s not like it would have put even a slight dent in my parents funds.

So my laptop is a bit of a clunker; not in the sense of being broken down. My laptop is massive and chunky and uber powerful. Specifics aren’t important right now, all you really need to know is that it’s basically a computer with a built in 4K monitor and is designed to play modern games on their most advanced settings.

If there’s anything I regret about the design of the laptop, besides it being 40 pounds, is the 4K screen. I regret getting that instead of a 1080P. You see, 4K screens are like communism, good in theory, but it’s horrible and hurts everyone but a select few when in practice.

If you didn’t know this, taking something designed for lower resolution screens, or just older hardware, and playing it through a higher quality screen can mess the image up. 1080P and 720P have this issue sometimes with low quality images and videos becoming more pixelated, but 4K screens have this problem with everything that isn’t 4K. Looking at any image not designed for it will just look pixelated and gross.

I regret this because I have a powerful laptop that, when playing anything, will look like poop. Barely anything is 4K, so it’s useless now.

I cringe every time I open my laptop and see the overly pixelated folders. Speaking of which, I’m cringing right now as my laptop starts up; now what should I do now that I’ve got my entertainment?

*4 Hours Later*

I spent some unknown amount of time playing games. It’s amazing how a game can just pull you in and make you forgot the world around you. After what I assume were hours; I was starving, thirsty, and tired. Luckily I just remembered the unicorn left me a bunch of water.

I turn off my laptop and rush to the pitcher and, without looking for a cup, down the entire thing.

The water tasted funny, kind of metallic. It left a strange aftertaste. It’s water from a magical unicorn, it probably doesn’t have a water filter. There’s no time to dwell on this, I must find a way to open that trapdoor.

In my peripheral vision I can see something mounted on the wall to my left. Turning my head, I can make out many mounted bass; which I make my way towards. Fascinating that a unicorn would have something like this in their domicile.

Once I’m fairly close to the mass of bass they turn to me and begin to sing. Now I’m no scaredy cat, I’m a very brave individual, it’s just that I can’t handle jump scares. Jump scares aren’t actual scares, but this doesn’t stop me from letting out a tired, but loud, scream. Playing all those games must have tired me out.

The sound of my scream seems to stir whatever’s below me. The trap door swings open and the green unicorn rushes inside, a red blanket held in his magic.

“Good, now I don’t have to walk around this … attic naked.” I say this knowing he can’t understand me.

He looks at me then the mounted bass and releases a sigh.

The blanket floats over to me and I wrap myself in it; feeling lightheaded as I do so. Lightheadedness isn’t a good sign when you’re tired.

The unicorn turns to the pitcher he left and looks it over; disappointment written all over his face. It was almost heartbreaking. I guess I should have shared the water with him. He lifts the water in his magic and leaves through the trap door and s presumably locked again.

“I should have left, or tried to, while he was doing that.”

I probably don’t have the strength to do much anyways. This warm blanket is really comfortable and makes my tiredness turn to exhaustion and then sleep.

*****Harpo’s POV*****

I put that water there hours ago. Why did it take so long for her to drink, why didn’t it knock her out? There was enough tranquilizer to knock out a minotaur.

How can I make sketches of her body, inside and out, if she’s awake? Maybe Prince Dusk can teach me a sleep spell. No, he’ll be super nosy about it.

But I should refill that pitcher and place it back in the attic so she’s not suspicious, maybe make her a daisy sandwich and bring an apple too.

On my way to the kitchen, I hear the pleasant sound of my hooves clip-clopping on the linoleum floors.

The sandwich needs to be special, something she’ll like. I know, I’ll add some rose and black pepper to it. I’ll need to use the wheat bread, and maybe put some hay or cucumber inside. I’m sure she’ll love it when she wakes up.

While making the sandwich, I decided to definitely go with the hay option. I’m positive humans are herbivores, just like every other pony and zebra in the ‘Humans Honorable Historical Heteronamia.’ Stinks we needed to invent a word for that to work.

The only ponies I know that think otherwise are Rainbow Blitz and Prince Artemis. Those two are the only ones I know of that think humans are omnivores. Well, it’s better than what griffins think; that humans are carnivores.

How can a society so advanced feed off of dead animals? It’s impossible for meat eating species to become so advanced. Just look at the griffins and the dragon. They eat meat and they live in what can barely be described as houses.

With the sandwich done, and the pitcher refilled with purified water, I quickly make my way to, then through, the trap door. Inside the attic is the human, but she’s asleep near that bass I last saw her near. I guess the drugs did work after all.

I lift her to a more ideal location and place her on her back with her legs spread open. I unravel my scroll and prepare my pen.

I first start with her hands, touching her fingers and checking their flexibility. It’ll be nice to get an imprint of these and make a more detailed drawing than I had before. I can really get a feel for the bone structure and what it might look like degloved.

Now her toppest of tops; her neck and head. Her head is what you’d expect from a human. Her ears are as deep as I thought when I tested with magic, her throat is the same, though I can’t really get a good look at them through the magic though.

Now her mouth …

“Solaris damn them.” She has canines, and molars. It’s like she really is an omnivore. I’ll need to study this more. I’ll need to make a drawing of those chompers, chewers, and shearers. Maybe make a mold too. I’ll need a flashlight to get a look at her throat and maybe figure out a way to feel the textures of her throat.

I’ll have to figure out how they became so advanced later on. I’m almost 100% positive it’s impossible for meat eaters to have brains complex enough to do what humanity did. Maybe they mostly ate vegetables and only ate meat when they ran out of other foods.

Moving down her body I find her teats. What big teats they are, but humans are known for that. It’s the first time anypony has seen a human’s bare teats though. It was always assumed they only made sculptures of mothers because of their teat size, but she looks too young to be a mother and she’s not lactating.

Her teats are soft and malleable. It’s as if my hoof will be enveloped in the warm flesh from the barest of touches. A truly wonderful piece of anatomy in both touch and sight. Her pale skin is nicely complemented by her pale-pink nipples and areola that look almost chalky. If I could complain about anything, it’s that they’re not symmetrical. Is that normal for humans? Perhaps there’s a spell I could use to fix that if it isn’t. I bet she’d be so happy I figured that out.

Now, onto her feet. They’re definitely the strangest part of a human. My hoof lightly begins with her soft soles and she giggles, it grew in volume when I added more pressure. Given how she giggled so much in her sleep when I examined them, they must be very sensitive. But that seems counterintuitive to what they’re meant for. She walks on them wouldn’t you want something tough to walk on? Not something soft and sensitive like these. They’re as soft as her teats for Solaris’ sake. What if she steps on a rock or something really hot or cold? I guess that’s why we always find human remains and art with coverings on their feet.

Her toes aren’t able to bend back very far. Each one can be maneuvered, but their range of motion is lower than that of her fingers. I can get them all to spread out at once if I put pressure on the balls of her foot. I’ll make a note of that on the drawings I’ll make of them.

Her legs and arms are as I thought. They’re not very complex and would be much easier to repair than a pony leg.

I use my magic to flip her onto her stomach. I maneuver her legs to prop her up on her knees. It’s time to check her flank and everything else in that area.

I move my hooves gently across her supple flesh that, much like her teats, molds around my hooves. It’s as pail as the rest of her body. I spread her cheeks apart and let go. The sound is a soft slapping sound and there’s a slight jiggle. I spread them open again, this time not letting go. I get a good look at her anus, but not much else. I spread her anus open and it smells as I’d expected and don’t wish to explore this part of her any farther. I don’t need a drawing of it either.

Now for the moment I’ve been most eager for. I flip her onto her back again, point her pelvis up, and spread her legs open. I’m greeted by the sight of her plump lower lips. Venus cleft I believe they’re called. There’s a slight fuzz on them and fiery orange hair covering her pubis. I spread her cleft with my magic and behold the glorious sight of her labias and vagina. It’s amazing, and something I’d never seen before. I’ve seen a mare’s parts … but not in real life and those pictures don’t even compare to what’s in front of me.

Carefully my hoof slightly enters inside her and I instantly feel her heat. It’s dryer than I thought it would be, but that must be from a lack of arousal. I’m not much of an expert on this kind of thing, all I really know is stuff I’ve read from books.

I can feel myself growing harder and a need at the back of my skull telling me to mount her. It’s so intense, it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. But I can’t do that, she’s asleep. It’s not right. But her mouth is fair game … right?

I let go of her and make my way over to her mouth.

----Janet’s POV----

My body feels exhausted and my stomach feels a bit fuller. My eyes slowly creak open to darkness. This darkness is joined by a feeling of weight and pressure on my face. I move my hands to whatever’s smothering me and gently move it.

It’s the unicorn creature; he was asleep on my face.

It was then I noticed a strange, salty taste in my mouth. Wiping my mouth, there’s a white sticky substance that comes off with each wipe. I look around and see a plate of food and another pitcher of water.

Maybe when he saw me asleep he panicked and tried to feed me in my sleep. What a nice guy. No that I think about it, the taste in my mouth is more like an over salted porridge. Maybe that’s what he tried to feed me. I must have made it really hard on him because he looks really tired. I do toss and turn in my sleep. That’s probably why I’m not covered by a blanket anymore either. I should make it up to him somehow.

First I should try that sandwich he left here.

A cursory inspection of the sandwich revealed that it’s made of crap. “What the hell is this?” It’s all flowers and some cucumber slices covered in hay.

I, unhappily, drink the water. Dull, tasteless water; incapable of putting out the fire that is the hunger that’s taken over my belly.

There’s a lot of paper surrounding the unicorn. I guess it wouldn’t be too bad if I just took a peek.

The ink is still drying on the pieces of paper and they’re just drawings of my feet, hands … “my breasts?” He really took note of them, down to the last detail. At least I think every detail.

I move my breasts around and check them from different angles. From what I can see, I can’t see the underside of them, these are very detailed drawings of them.

Another drawing is of … a vagina. A human vagina to be specific, possibly mine. I’ve never seen it before, but I can assume, given his other drawings that this is of me.

This dude’s a little creep. What’s wrong with him? I look at another drawing, this one of my mouth. There’s a drawing of a penis and a checkmark next to it.

Wait a second. A drawing of a horse cock next to my mouth with a checkmark. I wake up with his crotch in my face and a strange salty substance on my face and in my mouth. He stuck his dick in my mouth while I was asleep.

That bastard. Why didn’t he wake me up?

It’s weird, but I’m super horny and really want to learn more about this. I could have learned to give blowjobs from this.

Maybe he’ll do it again if I destroy these. But do it while I’m awake.

*Harpo’s POV*

That was a great nap, I think she’ll be happy if she learns how she made her stallion feel.

I hear a sound and turn towards it; noticing that the source being my human. She’s so beautiful, but the look on her face is something I can’t quit place. Disappointment? Anger? Gas? Maybe a mix of all 3.

Oh, she’s also looking at the notes I made. Must be amazed at my art skill. I should comfort her though.

“/Shhhh.\” I pet her leg lightly. “/It’s alright. I’ll get you a gas pill.\” She rudely pushed me away.

“~What’s wrong with you? Why’d you put your cock in my mouth while I was asleep? You’re supposed to do that when they’re awake.~”

She sounds mad. Maybe that’s why I’m having such a problem understanding her. Everypony knows it’s harder to understand another when they’re mad.

“~Why did you also take notes and drawings of me? Not cool dude. You should have done this while I was awake.~” She points to something in her hand.

Is she upset with what happened? Why would she be? She’s clearly not thinking straight and must be slightly delirious. Wait, are those my notes in her hand?

I make a gesture to my notes, “/Be careful with those; I don’t want to make new ones.\”

She looks at the notes in acknowledgment.

I turn my head to see if she ate the food I left for her. The water’s gone, but the sandwich is untouched. Maybe she wasn’t hungry.

I hear a loud ripping sound and quickly turn towards it.

SHE’S TEARING UP MY NOTES!

“~Now I want you to do this again now that I’m awake. Come on, get to it.~” She sits down.

She’s gone mad.

I subdue her with magic and rip the remains of my notes from her grasp. I need a place to put her so she doesn’t ruin anything else. I know, I still have that unbreakable cage from that experiment with the dogs.

Using my magic, I summon the cage and the mere sight causes my human to start shouting and thrashing about. I place her inside and lock it closed.

“~HEY! DON”T LOCK ME IN A CAGE ASSHOLE! Wait? Is this a sex thing like some sort of bondage? I guess I could give it a try.~” She rubs the bars of the cage in a strange manner.

She’s already so much calmer than before, but it might be an act. Humans are incredibly clever, and this might be a trick.

“/Very clever my dear, but not even a human can fool me. I’ll be back for you once I’m sure you’re calm and aren’t trying to fool me.\”

I open the trapdoor and make my way down the stairs; closing and locking it once I’ve reached the bottom. I also replaced the sound dampening with a sound proofing spell to make sure Praline doesn’t find out yet.

I’ll check back later and bring her some water and fruit. Maybe we could spend some time together and I can help her communicate. At some point I’ll need to remake those sketches and drawings though. I’ll be sure to be more thorough.

Lively Liberation

Author's Note

So, it's been awhile. The schedule I created, and told you guys about in the last chapter, initially worked but things fell through for personal reasons. I got Covid awhile back, I think in November, my grandfather, who I take care of and live with, also got Covid. He seemed fine at first but after a few months he started developing dementia. His doctor said it was something he was probably going to develop eventually, since he's over 90 years old, but covid caused it to happen sooner and develop at a much faster rate. That's just what the doctor said. Before this my grandfather was, for the most part, completely autonomous and capable of doing just about everything by himself. Most of my time now is spent either at work or, after the caretaker leaves when I get home, taking care of my grandfather.

I apologize for not getting these out quicker, but this is my current situation and will be my situation for the foreseeable future.

Lively Liberation

*Praline POV*

“Thank you, goodnight.” I wave out to my last customer of the day as I close up shop. It’s almost 7 and the rest of the shops around me have long since closed. It’s time to clean up and head home.

Through the window I see my only competition, Sugar Cube Corner. But seeing as they’re more of a bakery and malt shop while Praline and Cream’s Confectionary was exclusively candy, we weren’t really in the same market. PCC’s customers are usually foals while SCC is mostly adults. But still, we make sweets and that’s what matters.

It takes some time, but I’ve cleaned the shop up and I’m out the door. Not a few steps out I see Scooter coming towards me.

“Did the shop close yet?” The orange foal asked me in his scratchy voice.

“Yes,” I reply. His eyes instantly dim and his head tilts down, his face covered by his purple mane. It’s a heartbreaking sight. “But since I’m still here, I’ll let you in to get something.”

His expression changes instantly and he hugs me, bringing a slight smile to my face.

“Thanks Praline, you’re the best.” He lets go of me. “By the way, how’s Harpo doing?”

My smile soured at the question. “He’s been acting strange recently; very defensive. He’s been working with those anthropologist ponies for a while and I think it’s getting to him.” I eagerly attempt to change the topic. “How about you or Appleseed and Silver Bell?”

“They’re fine.” He releases a soft sigh. “But AS has a lot of chores and SB was grounded by Elusive. I spent the whole day alone.” His face fell again.

“How about, just this once, I give you a discount on your candy, and a taste of something special I’ve been working on.”

He jumps excitedly, his wings buzzing.

“Now remember it’s just this once.”

His head nods excitedly as I open the door and let him in. I take my position behind the counter and wait for him to make his decision.

He takes his time looking over my stock. There’s sweet, sour, bitter, and salty confections that Cream and I made earlier today.

“Do you have any of those caramel apple lollipops? The ones with the granny smith apples?” His eyes full of life and hope.

I shake my head, “sorry Scooter. Those sell out really quick, you gotta get here early to get your hooves on one.”

He barely flinches at my response and continues looking at the assortment of candies, as if he already knew the answer.

“What about caramelized fruits in general?”

“One of the first things put away are the caramelized fruits and vegetables.”

Scooter continues his search and puts his hoof on a glass container filled with jawbreakers and quickly shakes his head. He probably remembered that incident with the jawbreakers and decided he didn’t want to risk melting the rainbow factory again. The colt moves elsewhere for his dessert.

“Can I get a pound of blueberry salt-water taffy and a bar of raspberry chocolate?”

“Of course.” I wrap up what he wants in a small package. “That’ll be 3 bits with the discount.”

He pulls a bit bag from his mane, probably spending too much time with Bubble Berry, and hoofs over the 3 bits.

“Now, would you like to try that new treat I was working on?” He eagerly nods his head. “So, Harpo has been working with some anthropologists and found an ancient candy recipe.”

“This is a new human candy?” Scooters eyes were filled with wonder.

Human candies aren’t a rarity in shops. The majority of baked goods and candies are based on pictures of those food items and any instructions left behind … as long as those instructions were in picture form and easy to understand if you don’t speak the language.

“Yes, and I’ve been reverse engineering it. I’ve gotten various names from other anthropologists, and ponies who study humans as a hobby.” He stares at me questioningly in need of an explanation. “No human language has ever actually been translated. There are many theories and some groups say they definitively know what the languages were. I decided to settle on the name I liked best, the one Blitz gave me. He called them ~sour belts~ and told me what that meant.”

“But what’s the flavor?” He whined impatiently.

“So far I’ve only made strawberry, but I’m experimenting with others. I’m currently trying to figure out this other flavor Rainbow called ~blue raspberry~ and a generic green apple.”

“Come on,” Scooter whined again. “Let me try it already.”

“Alright, but these are sour and sweet candies. Most ponies can’t handle sour things, and these can get pretty sour. Are you sure you can handle this?”

“I LOVE sour candies. I can take it.”

I usher him into the freezer next to the storeroom where I already have the strips of the candy laid out on a tray. I put four in a small paper bag and give him a fifth.

He immediately pops the whole strip in his mouth without even chewing it. The effect is instantaneous; his eyes water, his lips pucker, and he begins to let loose a soft whine.

I chuckle at his reactions. “How’s the candy?”

He responds with a small whine but nods his head with, what I assume is, a smile. I’m not sure what he means by that. I asked him how good it was, so he nodded and smiled at me. I guess that means it’s good.

“Next time take smaller bites from them. They’re chewy candy and not meant to be eaten whole.”

*25 minutes later*

I’m home, I’ve eaten last night’s leftovers, and I’m in the bath. I hear the sound of Harpo coming down from our attic. I don’t understand why he needs to keep his human stuff up there: a museum would be better suited for them.

Once I’m done with my bath and dried off, I head to bed where I see Harpo lying in it. He’s facing away from me.

“Hey,” I say to him.

“You’re home later than usual.” His voice is cold and held a hint of anger and annoyance.

It’s not a tone I’m used to, but it is one I’ve heard before. But it’s usually after he knows I’d been around Blitz earlier. He can get jealous, especially when it comes to his anthropological rival, Rainbow Blitz.

“Scooter can in right after closing, so I let the colt in. He couldn’t hang out with his friends today, so I let him get some candy.”

“Oh,” Harpo’s tone becomes a bit brighter. “What kind of candy did he get?”

“He got some raspberry chocolate and I gave him…” I probably shouldn’t mention the new candy.

“Yes?” Harpo’s not been having a good day it seems and it looks like he wants an argument. Usually he’d let something like that go.

“Harpo, is something wrong? You don’t seem to be in the greatest mood.”

“It’s nothing.” His voice is emotionless. “So, you gave scooter those candies you let Blitz name.”

“Harpo,” I release a sigh. “If you’re going to be like this then I’ll sleep somewhere else tonight.”

“NO!” He shouts as he shoots up out of bed and look me in the eye. “I’m sorry, it’s just I got a lot of work done and something happened and it ended up getting ruined and I gotta start from the beginning. And … you know, mare troubles.”

Work ruined and rejected by another mare; he’s having a really bad day. Though he is being more aggressive than he usually is when it comes to really bad days. “I’ll accept that and forgive you. Though I want no more sass out of you tonight. I just want to sleep.”

I climb into bed and give him a small peck on the lips. “Goodnight,” we both say before we drift off to sleep.

*The Next Morning*

I wake to an empty bed, not an uncommon occurrence. Judging by the papers scattered across our room he has a meeting to get to. Probably sharing notes with his colleagues. I hope he hasn’t forgotten any in the attic again.

Thankfully it’s Sunday and I can get back to sleep, but there’s a thought that’s stuck in my head. Maybe he didn’t take all his notes. Knowing him he could have left them upstairs.

I’m sure he hasn’t forgotten anything.

I go to the kitchen and make my breakfast: honey oatmeal and a cup of apple juice.

It’s stuck in my head, what if he did?

I quickly finish my breakfast and take a stepping stool below the trap door to the attic. I have some trouble grabbing the dangling rope that opens the door. It takes a few snaps of my jaw, and I have the rope in my mouth. A quick tug of the rope opens the door.

There’s a noise coming from the attic: a sound I couldn’t hear until I opened the door. Either the sound wasn’t enough to pierce the ceiling, or Harpo’s been hiding something up there and he used a sound proofing spell. Knowing Harpo, the former is more likely.

I make my way up the ladder into the dark attic. The strange noise, sounding like some strange language, becomes louder with each step.

As I enter the attic, the lights turn on automatically. Must be a new spell Harpo learned.

The room looks the same as last I saw it, but now there’s a cage covered with a blanket. The sound of the strange language is coming from inside.

Did Harpo foalnap a mare of some kind and holding her hostage? No, he’d never do anything like that. It must be some type of experiment that he’s been working on; trying to teach animals to speak again.

*Janet POV*

“What made me decide destroying some random creature’s stuff was a good idea? I owed him for saving me from that forest, but what he did was really bad, and I probably should have been more cautious.”

After caging me, he took blood, hair, skin, and ‘other’ samples. Is he a scientist? How is a tiny unicorn a scientist? Unicorns are magic-the opposite of science.

“Now that I think about it, this might be the best place for me at the moment. Magic unicorns, wolves made of wood. What else is out there? I might just be safest in this cage.”

It’s not like thinking about what’s out there would help. I’m stuck in here and shouting hasn’t done me much good. I’m stuck here just contemplating what went wrong and my current lot in life … and the unicorn.

On the one hand, he saved me from the forest, on the other hand he violated my mouth and didn’t have the decency to wait for me to be awake. Then I can’t forget the notes and drawings he took on my body without permission, but he also gave me food, shelter, and (general) safety. He also put me in this cage when I acted up, so maybe he’s got a bit of the crazy in him. But he did leave me the blanket to keep warm.

‘I miss home; where I didn’t need to make my own decisions.’

There’s a loud creaking sound that breaks the silence of the room.

I quickly hide myself under the blanket. I leave just enough space to peek my eye out and see what, or who, is coming in.

Up the ladder came another pony. A cream colored one with a blue and pink mane. There’s something different about this one though, it’s missing its horn. Does that mean it’s just not intelligent?

Who am I kidding, that doesn’t matter. I need something that speaks my language AND is willing to help.

But I guess it couldn’t hurt asking this pony. It might understand me, or at least get the gist of what I want.

“Pony,” my voice deep and commanding. “I command you to release me from my prison.”

His face is contemplative, at least I think that’s what the expression is. It could just be confusion. His head shakes and he angrily says something I can’t understand. At least I think it’s anger, could be determination.

~”Don’t worry, I’ll save you.”~

It must be anger. I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s probably going to try and kill me now.

Damn these crazy ponies.

It walks up to my cage. It turns and rears back, getting ready to buck telling me it’s a ‘he.’ I move back and make myself as small as possible in the cage.

‘I need to get out of here.’

Instead of attacking me, the pony hits the top of the cage flinging the top of the cage across the room.

The cage is open and I’m free to escape.

I stand to my full height and wrap the blanket around my body.

“FREEDOM,” I bellow loud enough to shake the house and the startled pony.

I jump from out of the cage, grab my backpack, and run down the ladder to the floor below. I’m only slightly slowed down by the low ceiling and the vases I accidentally knocked over.

The low ceiling forces me to crouch slightly and the broken glass is something I try to avoid stepping on with my bare feet.

The pony shouts something angrily and gives chase.

I run as fast as I can to escape the small creature. I’ll need to stop it somehow. It was that moment I caught sight of a large bookcase in my path and near, what I believe is, the house’s front door. All I’m going off of is the peephole on it.

I slow down as I get close, making it easier for me to grab the bookcase and pull it to the ground behind me. I hear a loud yelp behind me, confirming that I had indeed stopped him from chasing me, or at least hindered him.

It’s I quick sprint to the door and within seconds I’ve ripped it open, which is a somewhat Heraculean feat given the door is locked, and I dashed outside to freedom.

Outside, I’m surrounded by more tiny horses. Some flying with wings, some carrying things with magic from horns on their heads. They’re staring at me, their eyes wide, mouths open, and hooves stopped in their tracks.

The ground is dirt, the houses that surround me are thatch roofed architectural monstrosities that belong in a Dr. Suess book.

I need some time to process this, and what better place to that then away from these crazy and violent ponies. I look to my left and then to my right. On my left are more houses, and to my right is a forest. This forest looked just like the one I had been in before. It probably was.

The ponies begin walking, and flying, towards me. They start slow, but began to speed up.

I nervously pull the blanket tighter around my body.

There’s a lavender unicorn that says something and the others stop moving. Some even begin retreating. He begins to make his way towards me in their stead.

Without a second thought I run to the safety of the forest.

*Dusk Shine POV*

Was that a human? It can’t be those are supposed to be extinct.

“Dusk,” a masculine voice behind him drawled in its southern twang. “Whas that whut ah thought that wus?”

“I can’t believe it AJ. But get the others just in case. She ran to the Everfree forest, we’ll need to make sure she doesn’t get hurt. Tell everypony to meet me on the outskirts of the forest. There are a few things I need to get from the palace, and I’ll need to tell Barb what’s going on.”

He nodded and galloped as fast as he could to assemble our friends. I hope we can solve this quick and easy, but I have a feeling this is just a precursor to future conflict.