Chapters A Matter of Pride and Honor
Becoming an actual Wonderbolt was a crazy experience for Rainbow Dash. Everywhere she went, at least one pony knew her name, and often repeated it (first whispering, as if unsure if it were truly her, then calling it out loudly once they were sure it was). Honestly, she hadn’t paid for her food in a month; and seeing the excitement on a young foal’s face when she acknowledged their presence (and left a personalized autograph) was deeply fulfilling. The other Wonderbolts laughed at her and said the novelty would wear off after a while, but Rainbow couldn’t see that happening any time soon.
Today was a prime example of this. She and a couple other Wonderbolts had just stopped by this little diner for a quick hayburger and a drink before tonight’s show, but all had ended up with a free meal (and Rainbow had gotten her own little impromptu fanclub at the next table over). She had just finished her dessert and was working out in her head the tip she should leave based on the cost of what she’d eaten when somepony’s voice broke into her thoughts.
“Well, well, well. Fancy seeing you here.”
Rainbow’s ears pricked. She hadn’t heard that voice in a while. “Hoops?”
“In the feathers,” he said. Behind him, his friends Score and Dumb-bell lurked, their eyes predatory and their smiles twisted.
“Hey, guys,” Rainbow said, pleasantly but guardedly. It had been a while since she had run into these three cumulus heads, and if they had never shown up again, that would have been just fine with Rainbow. “What’s up?”
“Not much,” Hoops said airily. “We heard our favorite Best Young Flier got into the big leagues.”
“Yeah,” Score added. “Wonderbolt level flying.”
“Yeah, I heard that, too,” Hoops agreed. “Impressive. Isn't that right… Rainbow Crash ?”
Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Oh, yeah,” she said, accepting the nickname easily. “Oh, you guys should have seen my first performance as a fully-fledged Wonderbolt. I biffed it right into a huge thing of cotton candy, made a huge mess, had to clean it all up afterwards.” She shook her head and smiled at the memory. Then she glanced over at them and smirked. They’d clearly been hoping to get a rise out of her by using her flight school nickname, but having her accept it—and actually play along with it—really took the wind out from under their wings.
Rainbow clapped her hooves together, once again in complete control of this conversation. “So what brings you three around here?” she asked. “Did you want me to sign something for you? Maybe you wanted to lose another ra- I mean, challenge me to another race?”
“No,” Score said indignantly, but it was clear that he was unsure of this new direction of conversation. Hoops also seemed unsettled, and he glanced around. He caught sight of another of the Wonderbolts, chatting at another table, and this quickly drew his attention.
Rainbow noticed how his eyes trailed over Misty Fly‘s flank. She could almost see those rusty gears spinning in his mind as he looked back at her; and she had a pretty good idea of where it was going. “No, I’m not going to set you up with her,” she said flatly.
Unfortunately, this gave him an idea for a new teasing angle. “Oh, that's ok,” he said smugly. “I imagine you have plenty of fun-” here he nudged Dumb-bell knowingly, “-with your Wonderbolt friends.”
Rainbow cocked her head. “Sure,” she said, confused. “We love flying.” A little smirk crossed her face. “You should try it sometime, if you’re not too busy… uh… what is it you do, again?”
“Independent contractor,” Hoops said, waving a hoof dismissively. “But no. I’m saying you have a little… too much fun with the other Wonderbolts.”
“Sure. Some of my best friends are on the squad,” Rainbow said, still not sure where he was going with this.
Score facehoofed. “He’s saying you’re sleeping with the other Wonderbolts,” he translated flatly.
Rainbow barked a laugh. “Psh. Nah. There’s an anti-fraternization policy.” At least, there technically was. Rainbow Dash had learned her first day in the locker room that some of the other Wonderbolts were actually quite close with each other; but Spitfire tended to turn a blind eye as long as things didn't get too disruptive.
“They don’t let you join frats?” Dumb-bell asked, confused.
Score gave him a none-too-gentle dope slap on the back of his head. “It means she can’t do the nasty with her other teammates.”
Dumb-bell brightened. “So what I’m hearing is you’re available,” he said.
A literal wave of revulsion passed over Rainbow Dash. Her entire body shuddered, and she had to suppress a gag. “Not a chance,” she spat.
“But you’re still single,” Hoops smirked.
Rainbow Dash knew she was being goaded. She knew she was rising to the bait. She knew she should have just walked away. But she had gone too far to stop now (and she totally had a great comeback for this one). “No, I’ve got a special somepony,” Rainbow said. She straightened up, matching Hoops’ smirk. “But if I were looking for an immature little colt for my special somepony, you three would be the first I’d call.”
“So you’re saying there’s a chance,” Dumb-bell asked hopefully, trying to confirm (and earning himself another dope slap from Hoops).
“Nah.” Need a stallion! Think, Rainbow! “I totally have a special somepony already. You wouldn’t know him, though.” Good! Keep going! “He’s an earth pony.” Yes! Perfect! They'll never be able to verify that!
“What’s his name?” Hoops demanded.
Rainbow Dash glanced around. She had not thought that far ahead. She saw a burst of lightning from the cafe sign across the street, saw the clouds being pushed by other pegasi, glanced down at the table…
“Don’t tell me,” Hoops smirked. “His name is Lightning Bolt Cloud Table?”
What the…? “No,” Rainbow said snippily. She glanced over, where another table was getting a nice, steaming slice of apple pie… Apples ! “Macintosh,” she said proudly. “His name is Macintosh.”
The three stallions were unable to go much further than this. Score shuffled uncomfortably.
Rainbow glanced over to see Misty Fly giving her the ‘let’s bounce’ nod. “Welp, gotta jet!” Rainbow tossed down a few bits, probably more than necessary, and turned to fly off; but then she paused. She smirked as a new idea occurred to her. She reached into her jacket and pulled out three show vouchers, and held them out. “Here,” she said. “See you at my next show. If you dare to show your faces there, anyway.”
Before Hoops could retort, Rainbow Dash had already flown out the door, blasting past Misty Fly and Blaze, leaving behind nothing but her rainbow contrail.
Misty Fly quickly followed, and caught up. “Looked like you needed an out,” she said.
“Yeah,” Rainbow grumbled. Now that the confrontation was over, all she felt was annoyed. “Couple of idiots from flight school, never really grew up since then.”
Misty Fly chuckled. “I hear you there,” she said knowingly. “The filly who cut a huge chunk out of my mane during class and told the colt I liked I had the feather flu behind my back had the guts to come to my house and ask me for tickets to my first show, because we were ‘such close friends’.” She barked a laugh. “Didn’t happen.”
“Yeah,” Rainbow laughed, feeling relieved to not be alone. “Some ponies, right?”
“Mm-hm,” Misty Fly agreed. “Speaking of, didn’t know you’d snagged yourself a stallion.”
Rainbow squinted. “What?”
“This Macintosh guy?”
“Oh!” Rainbow chuckled. “No, no. Actually, he’s my best friend’s brother.”
“Oooh,” Misty Fly chortled. “That’s gutsy of you, Crash. Best friend’s brother!” She jabbed Rainbow lightly in the ribs. “Better treat him right, then.”
Rainbow smiled and shook her head. “No, I meant-”
Another voice broke in. “Treat who right?” Blaze asked, dropping in from above.
“Rainbow Dash’s special somepony,” Misty Fly said, with all the mischievous joy of a schoolfilly tattling.
Blaze nudged Rainbow’s shoulder. “Ooh, Dashie, you’ve been holding out on us!”
“I haven’t been holding out on anypony,” Rainbow insisted. “He’s not my special somepony.”
“Riiight,” Blaze said with a knowing wink. “Whatever you say, Rainbow. We're not judging you.”
“No, I’m serious,” Rainbow tried. They landed on the balcony of the hotel room and walked through the doors. “He’s just a friend.”
Spitfire looked up. “I know that tone,” she said. “Come on, Crash. We’re all friends here.”
“He is really just-” Rainbow tried to start, but Spitfire cut her off.
“It's fine,” she said. “Really. Anti-fraternization policy only applies to other Wonderbolts. If you want to have a little fling on the side, that's just fine.” She lifted her goggles and winked knowingly. “Wonderbolts are pretty hot stuff, after all.”
“But I don't-” Rainbow started.
“Just don't do anything too stupid,” Spitfire interrupted her again. “Had one flyer once who got herself pregnant and didn’t tell anypony. We only found out when she lost her lunch on the sidelines; but by then it was too late.” A little smirk crossed Spitfire’s face. “Ralphina never did live that one down. Cute kid, though.”
More Wonderbolts arrived, right at the tail end of this conversation. “What happened?” Fleetfoot asked.
“Nothing!” Rainbow started.
“Just telling Rainbow to be careful with her special somepony,” Spitfire said easily.
Rainbow stomped a hoof. “I don’t have a-”
“We don’t want a repeat of our favorite track-side cookie toss, now, do we?” Spitfire asked with an eyebrow waggle.
Fleetfoot’s eyes widened in recognition. “Wait. You mean Hurl-igig?”
Spitfire barked a laugh. “No! I’d almost forgotten about her! Oh, Whirly. Great flier; but I swear, she showed up with a different plus-one at every party.”
“Yeah, I remember that.” Blaze turned and nudged Rainbow. “So, you bringing him to the gala this weekend?”
“No,” Rainbow started again. “He’s not-”
“Not a unicorn,” Misty Fly finished for her. She grinned. “I heard. I don't care. Galas are stupid anyway. It'll be nice to shock them with an earth pony.” She put on her best horrified unicorn voice. “‘Look! He’s touching things with his hooves !’”
“Yeah. No, seriously, I want to meet the guy who can keep up with Rainbow.”
“But he’s not…”
Rainbow’s words were cut off by the sharp blast of a whistle. Spitfire slammed the balcony door shut, and right before it closed, Soarin dove through the narrowest of openings, just barely missing it being slammed on his tail. He grinned sheepishly at Spitfire, who raised a hoof and made an ‘I’m watching you’ gesture. She strode in front, once more back in captain mode. “Alright, Wonderbolts, it's time. Suit up and move out.”
Rainbow scrunched up her face as she flew back to her room to grab her flightsuit. Now that Spitfire was in flight leader mode, she wouldn’t be able to get a word in edgewise until tonight after the show and afterparty—when everypony would then be too tired to do anything besides go back to their rooms and sleep until morning.
Ah, horseapples.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Applejack nearly spat out her drink. “So you described my brother?!”
“I panicked, ok?” Rainbow protested. “I couldn’t let them win!” She pounded her hooves together. “I had to get the last word!”
Applejack chuckled and shook her head. “Rainbow, you sure are something,” she said. “Ah, well. No harm, no foul, right?”
Rainbow chuckled lightly, if a bit nervously. “Maybe slight foul,” she corrected. “They think I’m bringing him to this gala thing this weekend.”
Applejack rolled back in her chair and laughed. “Rainbow, bless your heart,” she mumbled, rubbing a hoof across her face.
“No, I mean, I could, right?” Rainbow said. “He’s single, isn’t he?”
“Far as I know,” Applejack said with an easy shrug.
“You don’t know?”
Applejack took a swig of her drink. “My brother’s love life is his deal, not mine,” she said airily. “I ain’t his mother and he’s a grown pony. You can ask him yourself if you want,” she suggested.
“Yeah. Maybe I will.” Rainbow stood up. “Shouldn't be too hard, right?” She nodded, psyching herself for this. “I bet he'd like to go.”
Applejack shrugged. “Maybe, maybe not. Only one way to find out.” She pointed a hoof towards the west orchards.
Rainbow nodded and turned to leave; but Applejack’s voice made her pause.
“Word of warning,” Applejack said, examining her mug as she mindlessly swirled it. Her position was still lazy, but her voice had gained an oddly steely quality. “Mac’s really good at reading ponies. Better’n me, anyway. If you try any funny business, he’ll shut you down harder than a late freeze in an orange orchard.”
Rainbow bit her lower lip. “Thanks?” she said. She shrugged and flew off.
* * *
Finding Macintosh wasn't that difficult. He was a big stallion, and his red coat stood out clearly above the green leaves. She circled once, letting him see her shadow, before dropping to the ground. “Hey, Mac!” she called.
Macintosh, calm and unruffled as always, turned to face her. He dipped his head respectfully.
“What’s up?” Rainbow asked.
Macintosh shrugged and tossed his head towards the trees.
“Just working?”
“Eeyup.”
“Want to take a break?”
Macintosh glanced up at the sky. “Nope.”
“O- ok. We can just talk here, then.”
Macintosh nodded, and returned to his work. WIth an easy one-hoofed buck, the apples dropped into the waiting baskets below.
Rainbow blinked. That was actually pretty cool. She shook her head. “Ok, so the Wonderbolts are throwing this fancy party thing this weekend. Want to come?”
“Nope.”
“Great. I’ll come pick you up at sev… en…” Rainbow’s voice trailed off. “Wait. Did you say ‘nope’?”
“Eeyup.”
Rainbow’s ears perked up. “So…”
“Nope,” Mac insisted.
“Nope?” Rainbow asked, her ears dropping again.
“Eeyup.”
Rainbow paused, holding up a hoof and circling it as she tried to figure this out. “And that’s the ‘yep’ that means ‘nope’, right?” she asked to clarify.
Mac grinned. “Eeyup.”
Rainbow frowned. To be perfectly honest, this was one of the first times she’d ever been turned down for something. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. Mostly annoyed. “Why not?”
Mac shrugged. “Why would I?”
Rainbow blinked. “Because I’m going to be there?” she tried.
Mac raised an eyebrow.
“Because I want you to be there?”
Mac’s eyebrow went higher.
“You’ll get to see all the Wonderbolts in their jumpsuits?”
Mac’s eyes narrowed.
Rainbow Dash sighed. “Fine,” she said, conceding defeat. “The truth is I ran into some idiots from flight camp and I kinda told them I had a special somepony and I kinda described you.”
Macintosh snorted in amusement and cracked a half-smile. “Flattered.”
Rainbow looked sheepishly up. “So could you come? Just as a favor to me?”
Macintosh chuckled. “You want me to come?” He leaned in and smirked. “Then woo me.”
“What?”
“Woo me,” he repeated. “Make me want to come.”
Rainbow bit her lower lip. “Uh…” She slowly rotated so more of her body was visible. “You want some of this?” she asked hesitantly as she reached back and lightly tapped over her cutie mark.
Macintosh burst out laughing. He buried his face in the crook of his foreleg, laughing uproariously. He eventually regained somewhat of a hold of himself, looked up, met Rainbow’s eyes, and then burst out laughing again.
Rainbow’s eyes narrowed. If it hadn’t been directed at her, she might have found it impressive that he had made so much noise at one time.
He finally managed to regain complete control of himself, and shook his head, unable (or unwilling) to meet her eyes again. “I said ‘woo’, not ‘seduce’. Better luck next time.” And with that, he picked up the bucket of apples and turned and walked away, his short tail seemingly swishing behind him.
Rainbow scowled. Oh. He wanted to play this game, did he? Well, she’d show him. Forget the party. Forget the Wonderbolts. Forget those three featherbrains. When she was done, he’d be the one begging for a date with her .
A Matter of Pride and Honor
The locker rooms at the Wonderbolts Training Facilities were unisex; stallions and mares alike shared them. The official reason was that this was to build team unity regardless of gender, as every Wonderbolt needed to implicitly, explicitly, and completely trust their teammates with their lives, regardless of what they had beneath their tail.
The actual reason was that the Wonderbolts had been comprised of purely stallions many years previously, and once both genders were admitted, management couldn’t be buggered to build second structures.
So thus it was that Soarin didn’t even blink when Rainbow Dash walked into the shower room as he was shampooing his mane. “Hey, Rainbow,” he greeted her with a quick nod.
“Soarin, you’re a stallion,” Rainbow started.
Soarin froze, his hooves still in his mane. He glanced back at her. “Yeah…?”
Rainbow stepped a bit closer and spoke in a whisper. “I need some help with something kinda personal, and I think you’re the best stallion for the job. You up for it?”
Soarin’s heart started racing. Was she…? He shuffled slightly, moving his hind legs closer together, and briefly considered switching the shower to cold water. “You mean, in here?”
Rainbow nodded. “Yeah, here’s good; if you’ve got time.”
Soarin coughed. That was quick; but this wouldn’t be the first time he was thusly approached by a new flyer. The anti-fraternization role was, after all, a rule in name only; especially when viewed in the light of the management’s cheap hotel policies.
Ugh. Some of those Wonderbolts could snore .
Furthermore, as it was written, it was strict enough that it had likely been broken by every single Wonderbolt in history at least once in their career, some more drastically so than others. Spitfire really didn’t care, as long as it didn’t look bad to the media or interfere with the show.
Still, Soarin was nothing if not a gentlecolt. “Don’t you have a special somepony?” he started.
“Yeah. That’s who I need help with.”
Soarin let out an ‘ohhh’ of understanding. “So you need my help, not my ‘help’,” he asked to confirm.
Rainbow squinted. “What’s the difference?”
Surprise happened to be walking by, and had caught most of this conversation. “He thought you were asking him to do the wings-out-tails-up dance with you,” she clarified.
Rainbow started. “What? Ew-!” She froze, realizing that she’d just insulted her superior. “I mean, uh, not, not ‘eww’, but I mean, I…” She sputtered for a few moments as Soarin hid his mouth behind a hoof.
Surprise laughed. “Whatever you say, Crash. But believe me, during the day, he may be Clipper; but during the night, he’s Soarin Silverhooves.” She winked and ran her tongue across her upper lip.
Soarin scratched the back of his neck and shrugged weakly.
Rainbow looked at both of them. “I don’t want to know,” she said flatly.
Surprise shrugged as she walked out. “Your loss,” she called in a sing-song voice over her shoulder.
Rainbow snorted derisively. Still, what Soarin did on his off time was his business; and besides, she had more important matters to deal with. She grabbed Soarin and pulled him to the back of the shower room, where they wouldn’t be overheard as easily. “Look. Remember that boyfriend I have?”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t actually have him yet. But ponies here are expecting me to bring him. So what I need to know is how to get him to actually be my special somepony.”
Soarin blinked. “What, you’ve never tried picking up a stallion?” he asked.
“Not really, no,” Rainbow said sheepishly. “Never really had time. What do I do?”
Soarin tapped his hooves together. “So you want a stallion to be your special somepony in four days?”
Rainbow Dash hesitated, realizing how strange that sounded when somepony else said it. “...yes?”
Soarin pursed his lips. “Wouldn’t it be easier to just come clean to the others about it?” he asked.
Rainbow exhaled. “I guess,” she said, “but it’s kinda a matter of pride by now.”
Soarin grinned wryly. “It’s a little misunderstanding. I’m sure if you explained it, they’d all laugh it off.”
“I doubt that,” Rainbow said. Her eyes narrowed as something else occurred to her. “And you better not tell anypony about this, either.”
Soarin raised an eyebrow. “I'm pretty sure it'd be fine. We're all friends here.”
“And I'm pretty sure you got benched at the Equestria Games because Spitfire wanted me on the team,” Rainbow countered. “And need I mention the whole Wind Rider incident?”
Soarin bowed his head and exhaled. “Point,” he conceded quietly. “Ok. I'll keep it under my wings. So, stallions… we know what we like, and we like what we like. If you share an interest with us, there’s your opening.”
“So, like what he likes?” Rainbow asked.
“Yes and no,” Soarin warned. “We want somepony similar enough to talk with, but not somepony who constantly agrees with us.” He exhaled sharply through his nose. “You’ll meet a lot of fanponies who hang onto and agree with every word you say, without thinking or question. It’s nice for a bit, but then it gets boring .” He flared his wings. “I’m more than my wings and my pectoral muscles, you know!”
Rainbow blinked. “I… take it you get that a lot,” she said, trying to take a step back but finding herself pressing up against the shower tile.
Soarin folded his wings and glowered at nothing in particular. “A little,” he admitted with just a hint of bitterness.
Rainbow nodded, looking for something to change the subject. “So, uh, just out of curiosity, what do you like?”
Soarin brightened. “Ever heard of the Fruity Foals Club?”
“No.”
“Oh, boy. They’re little cards with different fruits, but they're ponies. I collected those like some foals collect Wonderbolts cards. Still do, actually.”
Rainbow blinked. “Ok then,” she said.
“I actually keep a couple with me,” Soarin said brightly. “I keep a Strawberry Filly card in my locker, just for good luck; but that’s a pretty common one. Fourth run, very common. At home, I’ve got a gold foil first edition.” He grinned. “I keep it framed, next to my trophies. They only made three hundred of them. I’ll have to show you sometime.”
Rainbow bit her lower lip as Soarin continued rambling on, oblivious to both Rainbow’s apathy and the fact that he still had shampoo in his mane. Perhaps this had not been such a good idea after all.
Then again, she could easily ask someone who knew Macintosh a little bit better. Her ears flicked up as this occurred to her. Why hadn’t she thought of that sooner?
* * *
Apple Bloom squinted suspiciously at the desserts spread all across the table. She glanced up at Rainbow Dash. “What do you want?” she asked.
Rainbow tittered. “Oh, Apple Bloom, do I really need an ulterior motive to share some food with friends?”
Apple Bloom demonstratively looked towards the empty chair on her left, where Scootaloo was not sitting, and then towards the empty chair on her right, where Sweetie Belle was not sitting, before looking back at Rainbow. “Seeing as how I’m the only one here in the crusader clubhouse, sitting here by myself , yeah, something’s fishy. You didn’t even invite Scootaloo.”
“Scootaloo doesn’t have the information I need,” Rainbow said.
Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes. “If this is about cider aga-”
“It was one time!” Rainbow nearly shouted.
Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow.
Rainbow took a calming breath. “Ok, yeah,” she admitted. “I did have another reason for inviting you here alone. I need your help. What does your brother like?”
“Big Mac?” Apple Bloom shrugged. “He likes apples.”
“Everypony likes apples,” Rainbow scoffed. “What does he like to do?”
Apple Bloom paused. What did he like to do? “Uh… he likes working?” she tried.
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “I could have told you that,” she grumbled. “Tell me something not everypony knows.”
Apple Bloom thought for a moment. She shrugged. “He likes spending time with his family.”
Rainbow fought the urge to facehoof. “Ok, how’s this? Let’s say somepony wanted to date your brother. What would you tell them to do?”
“He’s my brother !” Apple Bloom protested, her face scrunched up at that icky thought. “I don’t think about stuff like that! I don’t even think he wants to go out with anypony!”
“What?!” Rainbow Dash had never even considered that.
“Maybe he does, I dunno,” Apple Bloom corrected herself. “Why don’t you go ask him yourself?”
“Because… that would… ruin the surprise,” Rainbow lied. She scowled. She knew when she was up against a wall. “Whatever. I'll figure it out. Eat your dessert, kid. I’m out.” And with that, she flew away, leaving behind her signature contrail and a gust of wind.
Apple Bloom stuck her tongue out after her departing tail, then slouched at the table. A cupcake caught her eye, and she pursed her lips. She reached out for it and pulled it close, then slowly unwrapped it. After all, she had them; and, technically, they were hers. There was no sense in letting them go to waste. She could share with the others when they got here.
When Sweetie Belle arrived a few minutes later, she found a table full of wrappers and one very stuffed Apple Bloom. She stared in shock.
Apple Bloom had heard the door open. She slowly opened one eye and looked towards Sweetie Belle, and gently rubbed her distended stomach with a hoof. “I regret nothing ,” she said firmly.
* * *
Rainbow Dash hovered in the air, her eyes flicking all across town square. Macintosh had to have some friends around here that she could ask, right? Except no dessert for them.
The flower ponies. No.
Golden Harvest. No.
Muffins. No.
Berry Punch. Definitely not.
Rainbow sighed dejectedly. She couldn’t remember seeing Mac with any of these mares. Maybe he didn't hang out with mares. Maybe he didn't even like mares; and he’d just been teasing her.
As she thought about this, she turned; and nearly ran into another mare, blindly flying by. She recoiled. “Hey!” she protested.
“Sorry!” the mare called back over her shoulder. “Late for work!”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. Sassaflash? Working? That was new. She turned to continue scanning the crowd, and saw a stallion still waving goodbye at her.
Caramel! He and Mac were on the same winter wrap up team. He had to know something! She darted over and dropped to the ground, calling his name. “Caramel!”
Caramel jumped. “Oh, hey!”
“You’re friends with Big Mac, right?” Rainbow started.
Caramel shrugged. “I guess.”
“What do you mean, you guess?”
Caramel shrugged again. “Mac’s kinda friends with everypony,” he said.
Rainbow grumbled. “I don't want ‘kinda friends’; I want to know what kind of things he likes.”
“Apples?” Caramel guessed.
Rainbow slammed her hoof into her face.
Thankfully, Caramel was not tapped out yet. “Mac’s more of a private stallion. You want to know more about him, you have to get to know him on his terms.”
“His terms?” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Yeah, right. What I need is like a book that's got a bunch of information on different ponies.”
And then a slow smile crossed her face as another idea occurred to her. She knew of such a book. It would be risky to get a hold of, but it would definitely pay off if she did.
Caramel flinched. He didn't like that crazed look in her eyes, and he was almost relieved to see her fly off without any farewell at all.
* * *
Desperate times called for desperate measures, and Rainbow Dash was getting somewhat desperate. She needed information about Macintosh. Information not just anypony would have around.
This was why it was time to break into Pinkie’s basement. She needed… the Party Cave.
It was easy enough to distract Pinkie by telling her that Twilight had a secret to tell her. Pinkie had rushed off instantly to find out this secret, and she'd only had to dodge one or two dirty looks from the Cakes for taking their best assistant away with no advance notice. Twilight would deny having any secret, Pinkie would insist on knowing anyway, and the ensuing roundabout would give Rainbow at least a good half hour of Pinkie-free searching.
Getting into Pinkie Pie’s basement wasn't the hard part. She remembered how Twilight got down into Pinkie’s Party Cave the last time.
The hard part was when she took a step off the rug. She let out a squeal of surprise as her foreleg decided to rebel against her and shoot straight up into the air, dragging the rest of her body with it. Before she could even attempt to free herself from the rope, there sounded a loud ringing alarm… and a glob of something sticky landed on her face.
“Aha!” Pinkie proclaimed, lifting a floor panel up and climbing out. “You thought you could pull a fast one on old Pinkie Pie, but you… were… wrong?” Her voice trailed off. “Rainbow Dash? What are you doing here?”
Rainbow tried to answer, but the stickiness glob on her face prevented her from saying anything but muffled, angry noises.
Pinkie giggled as she realized this, and bounced over and pulled it off with a wide smile on her face.
“Me?” Rainbow sputtered as soon as her mouth was free. “What are you doing here? I thought you were bugging Twilight?”
“I was,” Pinkie said simply. “But then somepony-” here she pressed her nose up against Rainbow’s, “-tried to break into my party cave!” She recoiled, gasping. “Are you a spy?!”
What the…? “Pinkie, you know me!” Rainbow said, her body beginning to spin. “Now get me down!”
Pinkie pursed her lips. “I dunno,” she said, rubbing her chin. “I'm good friends with Rainbow Dash…”
“Then get me down from here!”
“But!” Pinkie protested. “But, but, but, Rainbow Dash is a good enough friend that she would just ask me if she needed help; sooo you can't be Rainbow Dash!” She proclaimed this triumphantly, one hoof on her hip, the other pointed high in the air, as if she had just solved a high-profile crime through the sheer power of her logic alone.
Rainbow scowled irritably, which was only slightly ruined by the fact that her body had slowly rotated until she was facing away from Pinkie Pie. “Or, Rainbow Dash knew that what she needed help with would be something that Pinkie wouldn't understand and so she had to do it without her.”
Pinkie gasped again, this time even bigger than before. “How dare you?” she demanded, spinning Rainbow Dash around so she could mush their noses together again. “Rainbow Dash would know that Pinkie understands everything that her friends need help with! That's part of what makes Pinkie so Pinkie… y!”
Rainbow snorted, unable to argue with Pinkie’s Pinkie logic. “Ok, fine. Get Ra- uh, me down and I'll tell you.”
Pinkie glared at Rainbow for a few more moments… and then brightened. “Okie dokie lokie!” Using her tail, Pinkie Pie slashed at the rope, and it sliced cleanly through, dropping Rainbow unceremoniously on the ground.
Rainbow scowled. Of course she did. She stood up, brusquely brushing off the loose rope from her foreleg. Pinkie sat, head cocked expectantly, ears pricked, eyes wide.
“What does Macintosh like?”
“Apples?” Pinkie suggested.
Rainbow scowled. Pinkie held up her hooves disarmingly, so Rainbow shook her head and continued. “Look. I need to get Macintosh to agree to go on a date with me, preferably by this weekend, so I need to know what he likes so he'll want to come.”
“Ohhh,” Pinkie said, understanding. She brightened. “Nope!”
“What?” Rainbow demanded.
Pinkie Pie placed a hoof over her heart. “In all matters of the heart, you can't cheat! That's what my Granny Pie said.”
Rainbow groaned. “Did nopony tell your Granny Pie that all’s fair in love and war?”
“You don't even love him, though,” Pinkie pointed out. “You're kinda just using him to gratify your pride and also to get back at those three idiots from flight school.”
Rainbow’s jaw dropped. How had she known that? “What?” she demanded.
“What?” Pinkie said innocently.
“How did you know that?”
“Know what?” Pinkie asked, brightly maintaining her innocence.
Rainbow scowled. This kind of conversation was most of the reason she'd wanted to get rid of Pinkie in the first place. “You know what? Fine. I don't need your help. I'll just figure it out myself. He'll be there at the gala with me this weekend if it's the last thing I do.”
* * *
The gala was, as far as galas go, fairly decent. Like most galas, it was full of snooty ponies with too much money, and the Wonderbolts were there mostly as eye candy and living centerpieces.
As much as Rainbow Dash hated to admit it, becoming a Wonderbolt had brought out a bit of an exhibitionist streak in her. She found she took a strange pleasure in strutting past older mares wearing far too much jewelry, drawing their irritated stares—and the lingering gaze of a few of the stallions they had come with. In every conversation, she acted the picture of politeness, so much so that Rarity would have wholeheartedly approved; and it was almost comical to see them get irritated at just how perfect she seemed to be.
Well, almost perfect.
Spitfire dropped down next to her. “Rainbow,” she started.
“Hey, Cap.”
Spitfire glanced around. “Missing somepony?” she asked, raising an eyebrow playfully. “Somepony… special?”
Rainbow Dash exhaled through her nose. “No,” she said. “Mac had to work tonight.” This was technically true. Still, she was getting much better at giving that line than she would have liked.
“Heh,” Spitfire chuckled. “Sounds like an earth pony. Well, I expect to see him at our next show.”
“Oh, yeah. That’s in a month, right?”
Spitfire glowered, her cheerful demeanor vanishing instantly. “Were you not paying attention in our last meeting? Next show got bumped up. It's in two weeks.”
“Oh, yeah. I totally knew that,” Rainbow lied.
Spitfire narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips, but didn't press the issue. “Just be there when you're supposed to, or you'll be on locker room cleaning duty for a year .”
Rainbow kept the smile on her face until Spitfire had left, distracted by some other pony who had paid far too much for this tiny food and slow music, and then she exhaled.
Great.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash lay pondering. What made Macintosh tick?
This was why she was here, in a tree in his orchard, pretending to be an apple, in the hopes of discovering some kind of connection.
At least, that's what she told herself. In all honesty, she just wanted to nap someplace comfortable. And tree branches were surprisingly comfortable.
And then she felt more than heard a knocking. She squinted, confused; and it soon repeated. She glanced down to see Applejack, knocking on the tree trunk like it was a door.
Applejack grinned when she saw she'd gotten her attention. “Howdy, Rainbow,” she said, taking a slight step back to see her better. “How goes it?”
“Not bad,” Rainbow answered. “Misty Fly got the worst flier of the evening award at practice last night, and Blaze got sick from some street tacos she'd gotten earlier, and it turns out Soarin is a sympathy puker so it wasn't pretty.”
Applejack chuckled and shook her head. “That's good and all; but I meant with getting my brother to be your special somepony.”
Rainbow sat up. “Great! It went great.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow as only Applejack can.
“Kindof,” Rainbow amended. “I mean, it could have gone better.” Her voice grew quieter. “It… it could have gone, really.”
“Didn't work, did it?” Applejack deadpanned.
“No,” Rainbow sighed. “I wasn't even sure where to start .”
Applejack nodded. “I'd figured,” she said. “He's a whole other bushel of apples, if’n you get my meaning.”
Rainbow didn't; but she nodded anyway.
“Well, you could come see him in his natural habitat,” Applejack suggested. “That might help give you an idea.”
“First off, you've been spending too much time with Twilight,” Rainbow accused. “Second, that'd be creepy . I mean, we caught some dude watching our practice and Spitfire nearly busted a gasket she was so mad.” She paused, then cracked a smile. “Actually, that was pretty funny; we held him down and Surprise put flight makeup on him and made him look like a clown before we let him go and that stuff is a pain to get off.”
“Ok, I'm not even going to ask about the flight makeup stuff,” Applejack said, pulling a face. “And I was going to invite you to dinner tonight; but if'n you'd rather discuss makeup techniques, I bet Rarity would-”
“No, I'll come,” Rainbow said hurriedly. “That sounds like a great idea.”
Applejack grinned. “I thought you'd think so,” she said.
* * *
Rainbow Dash rubbed her hooves together as Applejack brought out yet another plate of food. This was going to be good!
Oh, and Mac being here was good, too. They could talk and such.
Dinner started relatively quickly. And it started off going very well.
For varying values of ‘very well’.
Granny Smith paused and squinted. “Applejack, why'd you dye your mane like that? You look sillier than a cat dressed up as a rodeo clown.”
Macintosh snorted into his peas.
Applejack chuckled. “I'm Applejack, Granny,” she said, waving. “That colorful pony is Rainbow Dash, one of my best friends.”
“Oh!” Granny said. “Well, welcome! Why didn't you tell me earlier we was having guests?”
“I did, Granny. That's why you made an extra pie tonight, remember?”
Granny Smith paused, contemplating this answer as the food slowly slid off her fork. Then she brightened. “That's right! So I did.” Pleased with herself for having remembered, she happily put her fork (which was now devoid of food) in her mouth.
Rainbow glanced around, but this seemed to be business as usual for the Apple family. She happened to look a bit longer at Applejack, and she nodded encouragingly. It was time to make her move. She leaned over. “So, Mac.”
Macintosh raised an eyebrow. “Eeyup?”
“You have a fun day?”
Mac nodded. “Eeyup.”
But though Rainbow waited politely, no further explanation was forthcoming.
She ignored Applejack, who was hunched over and seemed to suddenly find her potatoes very humorous.
She glanced over and saw Apple Bloom, sitting up, wiggling slightly in place, and looking expectantly at her. “Uh, Apple Bloom, same question.”
“Yeah, I did!” she said happily. “Me and the crusaders had a great day! This morning we went to Sugarcube Corner and then we found a colt who didn't like his talent of dancing so we had a little dance party in the clubhouse but that didn't help so we built a stage and had a little concert in the orchard but he didn't like that, so then we…”
Rainbow Dash sighed into her ear of corn. This was going to be a long dinner.
* * *
Two mares walked back through the orchard, having a pleasant conversation.
“Ugh!” Rainbow groused. “He was like a rock ! I couldn't get two words out of him!”
“That's Macintosh,” Applejack said cheerfully.
“‘Eeyup’ and ‘nope’! That's it! Even Maud had some loose bricks in her wall! I mean, they were all rocks; but it was still something!”
Applejack chuckled.
“Would you stop that?” Rainbow demanded.
“Hey, I'm on your side here,” Applejack said disarmingly. “Mac's a good stallion. I think it'd be nice for him to have a little female companionship.” She nudged Rainbow Dash on the shoulder. “And it'd do him good if it were somepony awesome like you.”
Rainbow smiled in spite of herself.
“Problem is, you can't force it. Maybe it won't even work out between you two,” Applejack said airily.
Before Rainbow could protest, she continued.
“And maybe every apple tree I planted this year will shrivel up and die 'afore harvest. Still worth it to try as hard as I can, though, because-” here she sidled over to a nearby tree and kicked it with one hoof. A single apple fell, and she caught it and tossed it to Rainbow Dash, “-when it works out, it's so sweet in the end.”
Rainbow looked at her apple. “Thanks, Applejack,” she said, feeling a new sense of determination.
* * *
After the show was always a fun experience. Much like walking out on the street, there was the thrill of recognition and making somepony’s day just by acknowledging them.
But then again…
“Hey, Rainbow Crash!”
…there were those ‘fans’ that she wished would simply forget to come.
She trotted over, mentally kicking herself for actually giving them the vouchers. “Hey, Hoops. Score. Dumb-bell. Enjoy the show?” she started pleasantly.
“Oh, yeah. Riveting. Special somepony didn't show up tonight?”
Always right to the chase with Hoops. “Had to work tonight,” Rainbow said blithely. “But he said to give you these.” She reached into her bag and tossed over an apple to each of them. “Enjoy!”
“Rainbow Dash!”
Rainbow glanced over to see a younger filly, wearing one of those rainbow wigs that had suddenly gotten really popular. She gave the three stallions a brief nod and trotted over to go sign her program, making the little filly beam with delight.
With nothing else to do, each tried the given apple.
“These are actually pretty good.”
“Shut up, Dumb-bell.”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash sat in a tree. Usually, she would be napping in a tree; but this time, she was watching. Last night, she'd realized something in the locker room shower. Who you showed to the world was a little bit different than who you were inside. Maybe when Macintosh was alone, he was someone completely different.
So thus it was that she was… well, some ponies might call it 'spying', but she preferred the term ‘reconnaissance’.
And reconnaissance was much more boring than the word made it sound. Macintosh was quietly working, never stopping. His stamina was pretty admirable.
Unfortunately, his work also formed its own rhythm. The bucks, pauses, and apple drops followed at a steady pace. Pretty soon, Rainbow found her eyelids drooping. The branch was just so comfortable, and it really was a warm day.
The next thing she knew, she looked down and realized that she was looking at an empty orchard. “Horseapples,” she grumbled. She flew up and looked around. He had to be somewhere close, right?
Ish. Close-ish. She wasn't sure how long she'd been asleep.
She flew higher into the sky, her eyes scanning quickly for that flash of red.
There! In the corner. As fast as she could, she flew over and secreted herself in a nearby tree. She poked her head out. Did he see me? she wondered.
She got her answer when the tree branch she was on suddenly moved from underneath her, unceremoniously dumping her off. She could barely flare her wings in time, and she landed rump-first in a basket.
“Morning, Rainbow,” Macintosh said pleasantly, as if he hadn't just bucked her out of a tree (which, of course, he had).
“Hey, Mac,” Rainbow said, nonchalantly sitting up and brushing an apple out of her mane, as if she hadn't just been bucked out of a tree (which, of course, she had). “What's up?”
“Not much. You?”
“Just… watching.” Rainbow grimaced. She really should have thought of a convincing cover story earlier; but then again, she hadn't expected to get caught.
“Watching what?” Macintosh pressed.
Rainbow Dash picked an apple up out of the basket. “Would you believe… apples?” she tried, waving it in a small circle.
Macintosh raised an eyebrow. “Nope.”
“It has to do with apples,” Rainbow said, standing up out of the basket.
Macintosh chewed on his wheat sprig. “There ain’t even gonna be cider until…”
“It was one time!” Rainbow howled, the force of her protest launching her into the air and above Mac's eye level.
Macintosh grinned.
Rainbow sighed and dropped back to the ground. “Ok. I came to watch you,” she confessed.
Macintosh chewed his sprig further. “Usually charge for that,” he said flatly.
Rainbow couldn't help but laugh. “Yeah, that sounded creepy,” she admitted. “I mean… ok. I was trying to see if you were any different in private. You know, stage persona, regular persona, that kind of thing?”
Mac shrugged. “Nope. I’m a simple pony. What you see is what you get.”
“Huh,” Rainbow said slowly.
Mac grinned, a sort of half smile. “Disappointed?”
“Kinda,” Rainbow admitted. “I mean, I was hoping to find out some kind of hidden secret or some secret key or something.”
Macintosh shrugged. “Nope. Gotta do it the old fashioned way.”
Rainbow nodded.
There was a pause.
Rainbow coughed and rubbed at the back of her neck. “So, uh, I'll just… be going, then.”
As she turned to leave, Macintosh spoke. “You know what I like about apple hybrids?” he asked.
Rainbow blinked. “What?”
“You take two different apples and combine them, so you get the good qualities of both, like taste, texture, or color. They compliment each other.”
Rainbow cocked her head. What did that have to do with anyth-? “Ohhh,” she realized. “So you're saying we're like two apples, and when you put us together, we're different; but that's ok, because we each have different strengths?”
“Nope.” Macintosh grinned. “I just like apples.”
Rainbow found herself unable to decide if he were still joking or not. “That's… great.”
Seemingly satisfied at having gotten his point across (if he’d even had one to begin with), Macintosh turned back to his trees and began bucking once more (and this time, only apples fell out).
Rainbow said a brief goodbye and flew off. This would take a little more thought. His little apple analogy had given her an idea. If she could find something that they both liked, especially if it were for different reasons, it would be a great segway into a different date (such as showing up at a Wonderbolts activity).
Now she just needed something they would both like.
* * *
Rainbow Dash poked her head around the tree. There stood Macintosh, organizing his apples. She grinned. It was time. Time for something no Apple could resist.
A contest.
She stepped out in front and held out her hoof. “Hey, Mac! Wanna hoof-wrestle?”
Macintosh looked at Rainbow, down at the proffered hoof, and then back at Rainbow. “Not particularly,” he said as he went back to his apples.
“Oh,” she said slowly. She hadn't expected that. Still with her hoof out, she watched him hitch himself up to the cart and continue his work.
She shook her head and set her hoof down. She had other options. She quickly caught up. “Hey, wanna race? First one to the south barn wins!”
“Ain't in the mood for a race,” Macintosh rumbled, not even deigning to look at her.
Rainbow slowed to a stop. She frowned. But she wasn’t out of ideas yet. She scampered up, catching up again. “Wanna play horseshoes after this?”
“Rainbow, I ain’t my sister.” He smirked as he walked away. “Keep trying, though.”
Rainbow’s offer of a Sugarcube Corner run (her treat, of course) died on her lips. He had a point. She shouldn’t treat him like a male Applejack, even if they did kinda smell the same when they were all sweaty and stuff. Kinda like dirt and apples. Hay, Fluttershy and Zephyr were also brother and sister, and they were way different.
She turned and spread her wings. She’d think of something Mac liked to do.
* * *
There was a knock on the door, and then it was pushed open. “Hey, Rainbow!” Blaze called. “You in here?”
“Yeah, come in.” Rainbow called back from her position upside-down on the couch.
Blaze trotted in and stopped. She tilted her head, but Rainbow Dash was still upside-down. “What are you doing?”
“Thinking.”
Blaze cocked her head further. “While you’re upside down?”
“I figured I needed to send more blood to my head.”
Blaze shook her head. “Yeah. That’ll work great… when you give yourself an aneurysm. So what are you thinking about that’s worth risking your life over?”
“I’m not going to die from being upside down,” Rainbow grumbled.
“If you say so.” Blaze apparently didn’t believe her; she reached out a wing and flipped Rainbow off the couch and onto the ground. “Me and Misty Fly are going to grab a hayburger before tonight's exhibition, you want in?”
“Sure,” Rainbow said. She pushed herself up and stretched, but it was cut short as something occurred to her. “Hey, by the way, I’m also trying to figure out something fun to do with Mac, my, uh, boyfriend. Any ideas?”
Blaze chuckled. “All stallions want just one thing.”
“Apples?” Rainbow guessed.
Blaze barked a laugh. “Sure. Your… ‘apples’.”
Rainbow did not understand. She was fairly certain she was not apples. Ponies weren’t apples. Unless they were Apples.
Thankfully, Blaze continued. “You could give him a private show, dress up in your Wonderbolt uniform and show them off.”
Rainbow blinked. “He’s an earth pony who lives on a farm. What good would that do?”
“Uh… he could then take it off?” Blaze suggested.
“Then what would be the point of me even putting it on in the first place?” Rainbow asked.
There was a pause.
Blaze slowly licked her lips. Apparently, Rainbow hadn’t been playing dumb. “You know, sometimes I don’t know about you, Rainbow.”
“What? What?”
* * *
Rainbow Dash didn't even bother to scan the crowd afterwards. Macintosh wouldn't be there. She hadn’t even invited him, even though this exhibition was basically an open dress rehearsal with cheaper tickets.
This was legitimately starting to bother her. She was an awesome mare; she really was. She just needed to help him see that.
Or maybe he did see that, and he was just teasing her. That was also a possibility. In fact, that was actually pretty likely. Applejack was also one for a little gentle ribbing.
But if he knew she was awesome, and he wanted to date somepony awesome, shouldn’t he have at least tried one of the activities she suggested?
She shook her head. Trying to get a date was hard. As embarrassing as it would be, the idea of just coming clean was sounding better and better.
But she couldn’t worry about that now. There were fans here that had come to see her. And they were here to see an awesome Wonderbolt, not a Mopey McMope-mope-pants.
She paused. Huh. Maybe she’d been spending too much time with Pinkie Pie.
After a long but fulfilling evening of signing autographs and posing for pictures, the event began to wind down. Most ponies had already trickled out of the stadium, a few of the Wonderbolts had returned to the locker room, and the cleaning crews emerged and began to work.
As Rainbow was walking by, she passed an earth pony mare working. She slowed to a stop, then took a couple steps back. “Hey, is that a Fruity Foals Club shirt?”
The mare jumped, surprised at having gotten her attention. “Y- yeah, it is,” she said, surprised. “I’m kinda surprised you recognized it.”
Rainbow shrugged. “I'm not really a fan,” she corrected. She pointed towards Soarin. “He’s the one who knows all about them.”
She glanced over towards Soarin, and Rainbow caught the little spark in her eyes. Rainbow grinned. She was going to push them together. She leaned in and nudged her. “Go talk to him,” she urged.
“No way!” she squeaked.
“Why not?” Rainbow asked.
“You don’t go up to a Wonderbolt and talk about the Fruity Foals Club!” she hissed.
“There are no rules about not talking about your fruit club,” Rainbow said dismissively. “Besides, he’s a hardcore fan. He’ll like it.”
She scowled. Apparently, she decided that Rainbow was just teasing her; she turned and focused on sweeping again.
Rainbow shrugged, and waited. Soarin ended his conversation and began walking across the field to enter the locker room. He nodded to Rainbow as he neared. As he briefly looked back over his shoulder, Rainbow quickly snapped her tail against the cleaning pony’s flank.
There are a few ways to flick one’s tail against another’s flank. Some are more flirty, telling tales of intimate things to come later that night. Some are more playful, such as those delivered after bad puns and bad jokes. And some are closer to the realm of punishing.
Rainbow’s flick was more of the last kind. The loud snap combined with the sharp pain across her cutie mark made her jump and scamper forward… bumping right into Soarin.
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” she said rapidly. “I didn’t mean-”
Soarin waved her down. “It’s not your fault. I wasn’t watching where I… Hey, Strawberry Filly.”
“Wh-? Oh, uh, yeah.” She glanced down at her shirt, and a little smile crossed her face. “She’s, uh, one of my favorites.”
Soarin grinned. “She's my favorite. First card I got.”
She brightened. “You collected the cards, too?”
Soarin nodded proudly. He brushed imaginary dust off the front of his uniform. “Collect,” he corrected, emphasizing the present tense. He leaned in, as if telling a great secret. “I’ve got a gold foil first edition Strawberry Filly.”
Her eyes widened and she nearly dropped her broom. “They only made three hundred of those!” she breathed.
“I know!” Soarin said excitedly. “I keep it framed .”
“I'd love to see it sometime!”
“I'd love to show you! How about tonight? I'll wait for you to get off work,” Soarin offered.
The mare nodded eagerly, then froze as it suddenly occurred to her that she was accepting an offer to go to a Wonderbolt’s house. Over a foals’ club !
Soarin noticed that her heart had stopped, and he gently started the conversation again. “So, which of the Fruity Foals is your favorite?”
“Apple Colt,” she answered. She chuckled. “Made me feel kinda guilty when I learned to make apple pies, but I got over it pretty quickly.”
“You can make apple pies?” Soarin gasped, his wings flaring out.
“I make dang good pies,” she answered confidently, now leaning easily on her broom.
Rainbow grinned as she flew off, leaving the two alone. Her work here was done.
Now she just had her own Apple colt to worry about.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash flew up high in the sky, higher than most ponies could see from the ground. She did this because she didn’t want to be seen. She didn’t want other ponies to notice her.
So, of course, she ran into her favorite gray pegasus with the golden mane. Not literally; but almost, as neither was really watching where they were going.
“My bad!” she called.
But Rainbow Dash was not to be deterred. Rainbow Dash was on a mission. She had seen how happy Soarin looked last night after chatting with that cleaning pony. He didn’t even notice (or he just didn’t care) when Surprise switched his conditioner with her own super-poof conditioner.
And, to be perfectly, honest, she was slightly jealous. Maybe more than slightly.
This is why her latest master plan was simple. Macintosh had to have some sort of diary. She would just sneak in, find it, and check it out to see if he’d written anything about her. It would be like Daring Do recovering a priceless artifact, except she’d be putting it back when she was done, and nopony would be the wiser.
It wasn’t long before the green of grass diversified into trees. She was here.
Macintosh was easy to spot. He was in the upper loft of the barn, clearly busy sharpening a plow of some kind. This left Rainbow plenty of time for her quest. She quickly returned to the farmhouse, tiptoed past a sleeping Granny Smith, and she was home fr-
The door opened, and she shot up to the ceiling. She pressed herself against it as close as she could and held on tightly, both back legs braced against the wall, one forehoof against some cabinets, the other up against the ceiling in an attempt to both keep herself up without her wings and to remain as flat as possible.
Apple Bloom trotted in, her bow bouncing gently behind her as she walked. Rainbow felt her breath catch in her throat. She was no good at hiding! Her mane stood out brilliantly against the wood! She was going to be spotted and, once again, she had failed to think up a good cover story!
Ugh! Why couldn’t she learn?
Apple Bloom walked over to the icebox and retrieved a tall pitcher of lemonade. Rainbow Dash had a mini heart attack as she realized that Apple Bloom would then need a glass; but luckily for Rainbow’s heart, she merely picked up a clean glass from near the sink, poured herself a full-sized big pony serving, and drank it.
Rainbow Dash could swear she was drinking more slowly than usual. She probably already knew she was here, and was just getting ready to jump and scare her.
Apple Bloom finished her glass and sighed contentedly. She set the glass down, and Rainbow just knew she’d be seen if she didn’t-
“Apple Bloom!”
Rainbow’s ears pricked up. Was that Scootaloo?
Apple Bloom turned and darted out of the kitchen. “Coming!” she called.
Rainbow sighed in relief and made a mental note to do something nice for her little adoptive sister.
But right as she relaxed, Apple Bloom rushed back in. Rainbow quickly clenched herself against the ceiling again; but Apple Bloom was just here to quickly jam the lemonade pitcher back in the icebox before running out again.
Rainbow waited a little while longer until their voices had faded completely, and then waited a little longer before exhaling with relief. That had been too close.
Now more confident that she was actually alone, she dropped to the floor and began heading upstairs.
As she stepped on the second stair, it creaked loudly. Rainbow froze and gulped. Yeah, she was alone; but if she hadn't been, somepony definitely would have heard that. So she elected to fly the rest of the way up.
As expected, apple motifs were everywhere in this house, from the carvings on the wall to the picture frames to the pictures themselves. Upstairs, the first room she found was Applejack’s, with its ropes on the wall and books on the desk. Apple Bloom’s room was large, with a four-poster bed and a large box of toys.
Mac’s room was simple. It was large, for a large pony; but it was clean and organized. The bed was huge, and Rainbow Dash thought that at least three normal-sized ponies could have fit comfortably on it.
But as nice as the bed looked, she was not here for sleeping. She was here for more reconnaissance. She really liked that word, even if she wasn’t sure if she were using it correctly.
Her first spot to check was under the bed. That’s where she hid a few things. She was pleasantly surprised to see it somewhat messy under there. Somewhat like her own bedroom.
Unfortunately, there was no journal there. There was a storage box full of odds and ends, a blanket, a small whittling knife and a wood carving that was probably going to be a pony someday; but no journal.
Rainbow stood up and scowled. That was about as far as her master plan had taken her. She really needed to get better at making these.
But she wasn’t going to give up that easily. Daring Do never had a plan when she went into new temples; she improvised.
Ok, there was a lot of escaping traps, and witty one-liners, and every once in a while a fight; but none of those seemed particularly helpful right now. But there was a lot of improvising and thinking differently. That she could do.
Rainbow Dash took a literal step back and looked at the room again. If Macintosh had a book that he wanted to keep hidden, he’d hide it…
Her eyes fell on the bookshelf. That’s where a book was supposed to be, so it would be the perfect place to hide one. Nopony would think twice about a book on a shelf. Well, nopony who wasn’t as awesome as she was, of course.
She darted over to the bookshelf and started at the top. Most of what she found was informational books. Basic Tree Pruning ; Apple Tree Care for Those Who Care for Apple Trees ; How to Care for Your Apple Trees in Winter and Other Trees, Too ; Daring Do and the Curse of the Serpent’s Chamber ; 101 Apple Pie Reci-
Rainbow stopped and tipped it out to confirm. Sure enough, Daring Do’s smiling face looked back at her from under that giant snake she’d fought in act three. She blinked. The Curse of the Serpent’s Chamber was one of her favorites. Curious, she scanned the rest of the books, no longer looking at titles, but looking for that familiar golden swirl that every Daring Do book bore on the spine.
There were four. There was no order to them, and they were all different editions; they seemed to have been randomly chosen and had probably been picked up at flea markets or second-hoof sales. But he had them. Rainbow whistled. She would never have taken him for a reader like this. Maybe this could segway into a good conversation starter later.
Then she remembered that she was here for his journal. She quickly resumed looking. Not on the top shelf, not on the second shelf, but on the third shelf... There. It was a green book, with no writing on the spine. It didn't look professionally bound. This had to be it.
She pulled it out. The cover was blank, too. This was promising. She quickly flipped it open to somewhere in the middle and began reading.
The first thing she noticed was she was having trouble reading it. His writing seemed neat enough, for a colt; but words and phrases like caudiz, hep, nez, and The Ripple didn’t seem right; and what kind of name was Adrian?
She flipped to the beginning and started there.
It was a book. More accurately, it was a fantasy novel. Rainbow found herself caught up in this strange world, where cat-like creatures walked on two legs and all could use a sort of elemental magic, but their strength in this magic was somehow related to their actions. It was fascinating. For somepony who almost never spoke, he had a startling command of words, and Rainbow was drawn in.
And then the door opened. So engrossed had she been in what she’d found that she didn’t even notice him coming up; she was completely exposed with no place to hide, and even she wasn't fast enough to escape.
Their eyes met.
“Hi,” Rainbow started.
Mac stared at her. His eyes widened as he recognized the book she was holding.
“Just… doing a little light reading,” she said sheepishly, holding it up.
Mac’s eyes narrowed.
Rainbow continued. “Mac, this is amazing. Really, you could-”
“Get out.”
Rainbow froze. She'd never heard him speak so low. “Mac?”
“What is your deal?” he demanded. “You think it’s fun to sneak into somepony else’s room and go through their personal belongings? You think that’s ‘cool’? You think that’s ‘awesome’?”
“I-” Rainbow managed. She was stunned by his words; both by the truth of them—this really had been a low thing for her to do—and by the fact that he was saying so many of them in a row.
“I don’t know how it works up in Cloudsdale or wherever you’re from, but here, we respect others’ privacy. We don't go snooping through their things, we don't go sharing things they ain't comfortable sharing, and we don't go digging places we ain't supposed to be; so you can just get out!”
It hadn't been a true shout, he barely raised his voice at all; but Rainbow Dash needed no second invitation. She dropped the book and literally flew out the door so fast it whipped the curtains off the wall and almost created a mini rainboom behind her.
She made it back through town and to the fountain in the middle thereof before she finally felt safe enough to stop. She sank to the top of one of the statue and scowled at her rippled reflection. Some genius she was. She batted irritably at the water, distorting her reflection beyond recognition. She’d really kicked the thundercloud this time.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
It was nearly three days later before Rainbow Dash worked up the ner- before she finally felt comfortable trying to talk to Macintosh again.
She found him easily. He was working in the orchards, as he was wont to do.
She paused for a moment to reflect on how good it felt to use new words, and then crossed overhead a few times, just to give him warning. He noticed her shadow, and looked up. Rainbow couldn't see from this far away exactly how he'd reacted, but it seemed as though he'd tensed slightly. Not a great start.
She dropped to the ground a slight distance away. There was a brief, uncomfortable silence. She took a shuffling step forward, and then there was silence again.
“Hey, Mac,” Rainbow said finally.
“Miss Dash,” Macintosh responded curtly.
Rainbow winced. The polite, cordial greeting sounded somehow accusatory, though his vocal inflection never changed. “So, uh…” she started. “I think you know why I'm here.”
“Enlighten me,” Mac said coolly.
Rainbow took him at his word. “So I don't know if you noticed, but I kinda broke into your room to find your journal to see what you really thought of me but instead I found a story you wrote which was actually pretty awesome and I wish I could have… uh… finished it?” Rainbow’s voice trailed off. She had the distinct impression that she was, to use an earth pony phrase, digging herself a deeper hole.
Mac's eye twitched slightly.
Rainbow sighed. “There's a lot to you, more than I realized.”
“Eeyup,” Macintosh said shortly.
“And I'm sorry I tried to force my way into your life like that. And I'm sorry I broke into your room and violated your privacy.”
Macintosh looked at her with an unreadable, stony expression. “Apology accepted,” he finally said.
“So, uh, can I come with you today?”
His answer was short and succinct. “Nope.”
Rainbow pursed her lips. Yeah, she had probably deserved that one. “Ok,” she said sportingly. “Nice talking with you.” She turned to leave.
She'd almost made it out of the trees and was spreading her wings to depart before he spoke. “You know what I really think about you?”
Rainbow slowed to a stop, but didn’t look back. “Enlighten me,” she invited.
“I think you ain't got the sense of a rock.”
Rainbow blinked, as stunned as if such a rock had hit her right between the eyes.
“You rush fast and don't plan ahead. You don't think of anything aside from what you're working on right at the moment.”
Rainbow’s ears drooped.
“But you set high goals. You're tenacious, and you don't stop trying for ‘em. And you don't let nothing stand in your way. And those ain't all bad qualities; just a little misguided at times. If anything, it's kinda flattering you've set your sights on me. And if you tell my sister, I'll deny it; but I think you're the most athletic pony I know.”
Rainbow turned and smiled. “Thanks, Mac,” she said sincerely. Somehow, that had made everything worth it.
Macintosh merely nodded, and turned back to his work.
Rainbow Dash spread her wings and flew off, feeling as light as if a heavy weight had just been taken out of her saddlebags. Not only had it been nice to hear, but that had also most definitely not been a ‘no’.
* * *
Rainbow Dash had made an important discovery: they made apple-scented mane and tail shampoo. So thus it was that she was still in the shower, long after practice had ended, still massaging the lather into her mane, even after most of her teammates had left to go home.
She looked back at the sound of tapping. “Hey, Rainbow Dash,” Soarin said, almost hopefully.
“Hey, Soarin.”
Soarin sidled into the showers. “So, uh, you busy?”
Rainbow held up a strand of her mane, showing him the lather on it. “I'll be here a while, if that's what you're asking.”
Soarin nodded and stepped in, closer but still out of range of the shower head. “I'm taking Clean Sweep out on another date.”
“Aw yeah!” Rainbow Dash punched him on the shoulder, leaving a big wet (and somewhat soapy) mark. “That's what I'm talking about!” She felt an inordinate sense of pride that it had been she who had introduced the two.
Soarin grinned weakly as he brushed some of the suds off. “Yeah. And I was wondering what kind of things earth ponies like to do.”
Rainbow giggled. “Soarin, don't be tribalist,” she teased.
“I'm not!” Soarin protested. “It's just…” He sighed. “Ok, first time I brought her up to our training grounds. You know, show her around, give her a private tour, give her a little preview of our next routine, that sort of thing.”
“How did that go?” Rainbow asked, already guessing the answer.
“Turns out she's afraid of heights. She spent half the ride up puking off the edge,” Soarin admitted quietly, “and the other half apologizing for her puking. So that kinda threw a headwind on the rest of our date; and then she did it again on the way down. Green's really not her color.”
Rainbow flinched. “So, really, it's a shock she's going out with you again,” she said. It had not been said with any malice, but she flinched again as she realized just how rude that may have sounded.
Soarin hesitated, then nodded, unable to take offense. “Yeah. I just… I don't want to mess this up, you know? Clean Sweep is a sweet mare. She deserves something good. Something that doesn't leave her feeling sick on a work night. Something that'll make her want to say yes to a third date.”
“Fair enough,” Rainbow said. She'd already thought of what to suggest. “You ever been to Appleoosa?”
“No.”
“Ok. This Saturday, they're having a major festival. Applefest, they're calling it. It'll be an earth pony extravaganza.”
“I like that word,” Soarin said hopefully.
“There’s gonna be games, tons of food, and a race through the orchard so I hope you don’t mind getting your hooves dirty.”
Soarin looked down at his hooves and shook his head. “Not a problem,” he boasted.
“And, as an added bonus, earth ponies don’t really follow pegasi sports. You’ll be able to go incognito.”
Soarin brightened even further. “I like the sound of that.”
“And there’s a dance at the end.” Rainbow waggled her eyebrow. “Maybe she’ll be doing a special dance with you afterwards.” She flicked her tail playfully. It was nice to finally be able to tell a dirty joke like this. She’d never realized just how much she’d been left out of there in the locker room.
Soarin blushed slightly and muttered something that sounded vaguely like, “Kinda hope she doesn't.”
“What.”
“I've…” Soarin looked around, and then leaned in close to share his deepest secret. “I’ve never… you know… actually done it,” he confessed.
“You what?”
“I've never had sex.”
Rainbow blinked. “You mean…?”
“Yeah. I've never put my…” here, he gestured weakly at his hind legs, “inside a mare's… yeah.”
“But you're Soarin Silverhooves!”
“Yeah. Silverhooves ,” he emphasized. He reached up and gently touched Rainbow’ neck. He began massaging in slow circles, pressing down at varying intervals. “Every mare I've been with, my hooves have been enough to leave her satisfied; and that's been fine by me.”
Rainbow whimpered against her will. “Oh hey, that does feel good,” she purred.
Too soon, Soarin pulled away. “But what if she does want to do it with me?” he asked worriedly. “What if I disappoint her? What if she doesn’t want to go out with me again? What if- aigh !”
Rainbow had tilted her wing so it had collected water from the shower, and then threw it in Soarin’s face, neatly disrupting his freakout. “What if she likes you for more than your wings and your pectoral muscles?” she challenged.
“Uh…”
“You’re overthinking it,” she said, splashing him with water again.
“Hey! Cut that out!” Soarin protested.
“Just go. Have a good time. Buy her one of those giant caramel apples and don’t get mad if she spills some on you.”
Soarin cracked a smile. “Sounds good. You going?”
She hadn’t really planned on it; but for some reason, hearing it aloud from somepony else made going sound like a good idea. “Yeah. And you’d better stay out of the pie eating contest, because I’m going to win it.”
Soarin chuckled, regaining some of his normal cocky swagger. “Yeah? I’ll come watch.”
“You do that,” Rainbow said.
And with that, Soarin left, with a much brighter spring in his step than when he’d arrived.
Rainbow turned her face back to the shower, letting the water stream through the fur on her face. Going would be a great idea. Mac would be there, right? Probably; he was related to most of the ponies there in Appleoosa. Yeah, why not? She didn’t have anything really important going on on Saturday.
She did have some things to think about, though.
* * *
The bell jingled cheerfully overhead Rainbow Dash slowly entered Rarity’s boutique. Rarity was her friend, sure; but she always did feel a little bit out of place in here. Probably because she sold more hats and dresses than flightsuits.
At the sound of the bell, Rarity emerged from the back room. “Welcome to… oh, hello, Rainbow Dash.”
“Yeah. Hi.”
Rarity trotted over to give her a proper greeting hug. She held on a bit longer than strictly needful. “Oh, your mane smells lovely today,” she said.
Rainbow shrugged her off. “Yeah, great. Rarity, can we talk about stallions?”
Rarity blinked. “Certainly, darling; whatever brought this on?”
“They’re… I dunno. I'm starting to think that stallions just want to be understood.”
Rarity tittered. “And what you've got beneath your tail, of course.”
“Beneath my…?” Rainbow spun in the air and checked to see exactly what Rarity was referring to. “Oh. Right.” She straightened up. “But still.”
“I'm sure they do,” Rarity said amicably. “Stallions are ponies, too, you know. With their own hopes and dreams and fears and needs and desires; it's really quite complicated.”
“I think I’m figuring that out,” Rainbow said. “Soarin just talked to me and it was basically all ‘I really like this mare but I’m going to mess it up help me Rainbow Dash’.”
Rarity tittered. “Typical stallion,” she said. “If they’d just step up a bit, we mares would surely appreciate their efforts. I may be a mare of high taste; but I certainly would give credence to an honest, sincere effort. Luckily, you’ve chosen a steady hoof in Macintosh, so…” Her voice trailed off as she realized that she’d said too much.
Rainbow was so stunned she nearly forgot to keep flapping her wings. “What?!”
Rarity blinked. She raised a hoof and rocked back slightly. “Uh… did… did I say something?” she squeaked.
“Yes!” Rainbow sputtered.
“What?” Rarity asked innocently.
“Don’t you pull that innocent act on me,” Rainbow growled.
Rarity tried it anyway. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Her voice was an octave too high, her smile was a bit too wide, and her eyes were a bit too small and doing a little too much darting around for Rainbow to even consider believing her.
Rainbow held a hoof up to her ear. “What was that, Rarity?” she asked loudly. “You want me to bring you a stormcloud and leave it right over your boutique? That’ll leave mud puddles everywhere; but ok, anything for a friend!”
This, as can well be imagined, made Rarity drop the innocent act instantaneously. “Oh, alright, Applejack may have let something slip at one of our spa outings,” she blurted.
“Yeah? What’d she say?” Rainbow demanded.
“She said she thought it was going well.”
Rainbow blinked. She hadn’t expected Applejack to be so vocal about her support.
“She also said she hoped you’d show up at, uh… the Apple Festival or something like that. Apparently, Macintosh is going to defend his turkey call title, and she, ah, ‘reckons you’d get a good laugh out of seeing that’.”
A little smile spread unintentionally across Rainbow’s face. That did sound like something she’d like to see.
“Oh, I know that look,” Rarity nearly crowed. “I’ll admit, I hadn’t thought about it much before now, but you two would really make quite the pair. In fact, the only problem I can see with this relationship will be getting you to stay still long enough to be fitted for maternity clothes.”
Rainbow cocked her head. “Maternity clothes? Like, mom saddles? Why would I need-?” She choked as the implications hit her. “I want to go out with him, not make a foal with him!”
Rarity raised an eyebrow. “That's how it starts , darling, and it just goes on naturally from there. I don’t suppose you were planning on dating and dating forever, now, were you?”
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Fine. If I ever get pregnant—and that's a big if—then I'll come here first.”
“Thank you, darling,” Rarity said pleasantly. “I suppose it goes without saying that I’ll get to make your wedding dress, too?”
“Don’t push it.”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash looked around and adjusted the hat she wore. It really didn’t do much to disguise her (it wasn't like she could wear a hat over her tail), but she definitely felt like she was fitting in. Everywhere around her, ponies wearing similar hats milled around her. There were so many things to do! Activities ranged from bobbing for apples to hayrides to ring toss (mouths only) to games of skill and feats of strength; and sideshows. Rainbow paused and watched two ponies dressed as rodeo clowns proceeded to have a silent argument about a single apple, and she couldn’t help but chuckle along with the foals as one pulled a large foam hammer and began hitting the other with it. She moved on and was stunned to recognize a light blue unicorn standing on a small box.
She was holding a small knife and was using it to slice an apple. “But really, we all know what’s happening next. Trixie will cut open this apple and will find your ticket…” She paused and squinted at the apple, as if confused at what she saw. “No,” she said, prying it open and pulling something small and curled tightly out of the core. “It’s the ten of cups!”
“That’s my card!” a foal shouted.
Rainbow got the feeling she’d missed the setup to this trick; the other ponies stomped and seemed a bit more appreciative of this act than she did. She smiled and kept moving. Among all these ponies, though, she hadn’t seen-
There! She caught a glimpse of Soarin’s tail. She slipped through the crowd to see him standing next to a very excited Clean Sweep. Her ears were up, her eyes were bright, and she was smiling as widely as Pinkie Pie, head swiveling to take it all in. Rainbow waved, and Soarin gave her an approving nod. Something caught Clean Sweep’s eye, and she squealed and dragged him off; and Soarin did not seem to mind at all.
Rainbow couldn’t help but grin. That’s right. She was good .
Her smile slipped slightly as her stomach growled. She had been keeping away from the food section in a bid to stay ready for the pie-eating contest, but she was starting to doubt that that had been a good strategy. Everything here just smelled so good…
She glanced up at the clock. The smile quickly returned. It was time.
* * *
Speed. She was speed.
The pie-eating contest was one of speed. One pie in as short a time as possible. As much as she’d been hoping for a number of pies eaten contest, perhaps it was best this way. She did have a show coming up in a couple weeks, and getting sick on pie would probably guarantee worst flyer of the evening awards for a week.
Also there’d be less pies they needed to make. That was probably part of it, too.
She glanced around her. She was surrounded by earth ponies, but down near the end she recognized one pegasus. She whistled to get his attention, and made an ‘I’m watching you’ gesture with her hoof.
Soarin tipped his head towards Clean Sweep, and shrugged lightly. His actions and little smile clearly said ‘She put me up to it’; but he didn’t seem to mind this, either.
Rainbow chuckled and looked back at the crowd around her- Wait. She squinted. Was that Mac?
Rainbow barely heard the starting whistle, and so started a split second behind everypony else. Soarin, in particular, tore into his pie with reckless abandon; and Rainbow Dash could hear the squealing protests of a pony who was probably too close and ended up in the splash zone.
She was fast, but the early delay cost her. It was only a slight consolation that Soarin did not win, either (though by the way Clean Sweep was cleaning up some of the pie off his face with her tongue, he probably thought he had won).
She scanned the crowd again, and for a brief moment, locked eyes with Macintosh. He gave her a brief approving nod, and then faded back into the crowd.
Rainbow suddenly felt as though she had won something, too.
* * *
Rainbow Dash was not a huge fan of turkeys. Sure, they were fat and kinda funny; but they just kinda sat there and gobbled. At least it wasn’t geese. Geese were the worst . Ever since she’d been flying under a formation and one had happened to drop a little white bomb right on her mane, she’d hated geese.
Thankfully for all pegasi present, there weren’t actually any birds around. This competition was only for ponies. And none looked prouder than Macintosh, up there with ribbons and even a medal or two all up on his chest like some sort of rockstar.
To be perfectly honest, Rainbow Dash had no idea what made a good turkey call. All of these ponies looked different, different sizes; there was even one precutiescent filly standing in line (though, in all fairness, she did look as if she were a bit lost and unsure how she had gotten there).
As it turned out, Macintosh was very good at turkey calls. Rainbow had no idea what they were even judging on, but somehow or other, he ended up with another ribbon pinned to his chest.
Rainbow put her hoof to her lips and tried to whistle. She liked it when ponies did that for her.
Unfortunately, she’d never actually learned how to do it; so after a few failed attempts, she settled for stomping as loudly as she could.
* * *
The day was just starting to cool down, which meant that it was time for the race. Why the race wasn’t early in the morning when ponies were rested, Rainbow had no idea. Still, Rainbow mused as she rolled out her neck, there was no reason to not win anyway.
Applejack came up behind her and nudged her. “Hey, Rainbow. Figured you’d be here.”
“There’s a race to win,” Rainbow said with more than a hint of pride. “Of course I’m going to be there.”
Applejack chuckled. “You ain’t gonna be taking things too far this time, though, right?” she asked playfully.
“Nah,” Rainbow said. “I just have one speed: the speed…” she paused for dramatic effect, “of awesome .”
Applejack barked a laugh. “Sure, sure,” she said. “Just remember, this is a ‘fun run’. For fun , not for glory or anything.”
Rainbow looked around. Now that she took some time to look at her competitors… “Is that why there’s all these ponies dressed up as apples?”
“Pretty much,” Applejack said, ducking under a passing oversized flag of Equestria attached to somepony’s saddle.
“Psh.” Rainbow grumbled, kicking her hooves out. “Takes all the fun out of competing. Not even worth it to try anymore.”
“Yeah, well, just don’t come in last place,” Applejack said, nudging her playfully again in the ribs. “Seems you’ve got somepony watching you.”
Rainbow looked over at the stands. She had expected to see maybe her friends, maybe Apple Bloom waving from the benches.
She saw Macintosh, lazily chewing on a wheat sprig. When he made eye contact with her, he may have cracked a half-smile, then looked away.
Rainbow turned to pre-emptively glare at Applejack, sure she was going to turn this into a joke of some sort; but Applejack seemed to be in earnest. She patted her on the shoulder. “Good luck, sugarcube,” she said as she trotted over to her place on the starting line.
The fun run itself wasn’t bad. Rainbow Dash found herself more intrigued by the costumes of some of the participants. One particularly tall mare had donned a wig reminiscent of Celestia’s flowing mane, and Rainbow smiled wide when she saw a young filly wearing a rainbow-colored wig. She met her eyes and winked, and the filly's jaw dropped. Heh. Even in Apploosa, she had it.
Her amusement at the other racers (and the fact that she stopped for a lemonade halfway through the run) meant that she didn’t cross the finish line first. But, seeing as how the prize winner got a bucket of water dumped on him by the exuberant master of ceremonies (much to the applause of the audience), Rainbow figured that was just as well.
She was about to go look for Applejack when she felt somepony’s eyes on her. She looked over her shoulder and saw Macintosh.
“You did good,” he said.
Rainbow grinned impishly. “Thanks. Wait until I actually try .”
Macintosh held out a large cup. “Brought you something,” he offered.
“Thanks.” Rainbow picked it up and took a drink, and her eyes widened. That wasn’t water in the cup. It was sweet, crisp, and just the right amount of tangy. “You brought me cider. And this is the good stuff,” she said slowly.
“Eeyup.”
“I didn’t know they were selling this here,” Rainbow said, almost reverently.
“They’re not,” Macintosh said, one side of his face curling up in a smile. “Brought it to share.”
“How many lucky ponies get to share?”
“So far?” Macintosh made a show of tapping on his chin, as if thinking. “One.”
Rainbow grinned. “You’re the best, Mac,” she said.
“Eeyup,” Mac said modestly.
Rainbow Dash finished her drink, and then looked around. Ponies were moving, and she had a pretty good idea of where they were going. She looked back. “You know, I’m not much for dancing, and I’m starving after that run. You wanna go get a hayburger or something?”
Macintosh smiled, that same, easy smile. “I’d like that.”
* * *
Rainbow Dash flew back towards her house. Hayburgers with Macintosh had been pretty fun. Really, they hadn’t had much conversation; but they hadn’t needed much. After being outside in the sun all day, it was actually pretty nice to just… chill.
She landed on her doorstep and slid her way inside. After greeting Tank and getting ready for bed, she slipped under the covers and closed her eyes.
And then they snapped open.
I think I just had my first real date.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash hunched over the book she’d ~~stolen~~ borrowed without permission from Twilight’s library, flashlight clenched firmly enough in her mouth to leave teeth marks. 101 Questions and Answers About Dating should have had this covered, right? ‘What to do after you had a date’ should be in here, right?
This wasn’t even about pride anymore. Hoops, Score, and Dumb-bell could all go get the feather flu for all she cared. Hay, the Wonderbolts could go get the feather flu. She’d had a good time with Macintosh, and even if he didn’t ever want to go get hayburgers again, she kinda hoped he did.
There. She found the section labeled ‘after a date’.
Don’t seem too eager; but don’t seem too distant. If you enjoyed it, say so; but if you didn’t, sometimes it’s easiest to just cut her loose. Saying you enjoyed a date when you didn’t to spare their feelings (and then turning down later dates) just means she’ll think you’re playing hard-to-get, and is much more hurtful in the long run.
“But I liked it!” Rainbow said through the flashlight. “We didn’t even do anything and I liked it!” She flipped through the book again. Finally, out of desperation, she looked at the last page.
And if this all seems overwhelming, that’s just fine. Don’t try too hard. If she loves you for you, you’ll win her best by being yourself.
Rainbow spat out the flashlight, equal parts relieved and annoyed. “What, you couldn’t have just put that there earlier?” Rainbow demanded of the book.
The book, of course, remained silent.
* * *
Rainbow Dash flew to the farmhouse at first light. There, she found Macintosh. He was outside, just beside the barn. He seemed to be intent on doing something, so she hovered there, watching. Using a ladle, he took a long drink of water from the rain barrel… and then splashed the rest in his face.
Effective , Rainbow mused.
He shook his head, somewhat like a dog shaking off all the water. Then he turned and began to walk. Curious, Rainbow followed.
He moved slowly, easily, through the trees. Finally, he arrived at a clearing. There, he sat under a tree and closed his eyes. His breathing slowed.
This seemed like a good time. Rainbow flew lower, making sure she beat her wings loudly as she descended to not startle him. “Hey,” she started.
“Morning,” Macintosh returned, that little smile appearing quickly, as if he were just happy to see her.
Rainbow scuffed a hoof. “Had fun last night,” she said.
“Me too.”
There was a pause.
Rainbow looked out over the clearing. “Nice morning, huh?”
“Eeyup.”
There was another pause.
“Doing anything fun today?”
“Working.”
Rainbow felt as though she could be irritating him with her questions. She decided to shift tactics: doing something he liked. “You mind if I…?” She gestured towards the ground next to him.
Mac scooted over slightly to give her room.
“Alright. I'll try your whole being quiet thing.”
There was a bit of a pause as Rainbow realized that she wasn’t exactly sure how to do this. So she stepped a little bit closer, and after the briefest of hesitations, sat down next to him, closed her eyes, and tried to take in everything. She took a slow breath in. Something something one with nature and such.
And then Macintosh spoke, almost low enough to be a rumble. “It ain't about being quiet,” he said softly, as if about to share a hidden secret. “It's about feeling like it's safe to share.”
“Is it not safe to share?” Rainbow asked.
“Not always,” Macintosh said.
“Huh,” Rainbow said slowly. “Kinda figured, you know, with your family and all…”
“Applejack's a good mare,” Mac said firmly. “But she tackles problems head-on. Sometimes I don't want that. Sometimes I just want somepony to listen to my problems, not just try and fix them. Apple Bloom’s too young to burden with my silly problems, and Granny Smith falls asleep every couple words. Made me realize that sometimes it's better to keep it to myself.”
Rainbow nodded, deciding not to call attention to how much he was sharing right now. “Do you feel safe enough to share that kind of stuff with me?” she asked.
Macintosh shrugged. “I'm not sure yet,” he answered honestly.
Rainbow did not feel offended. She probably should have; but she didn't. She just shrugged.
“But I'd be willing to try.”
Rainbow grinned. “I'd like that.”
Macintosh smiled, a real smile. “Me too.”
There was another pause, somewhat longer this time.
“So… got anything to share?”
“Hoof’s falling asleep,” Macintosh answered, pushing himself up. “Guess it's time to get back to work.”
“Wait,” Rainbow said, shooting to her hooves. “That's it?”
“Eeyup.”
“No, like, deep dark hidden secrets or anything?”
“Once I accidentally bucked a squirrel right out of a tree and gave it a concussion. That count?”
Rainbow threw back her head and groaned. “Ugh! Maaac!”
She could swear she heard him chuckling to himself as he walked away.
Her eyes narrowed. Fine. He wanted to talk about sharing? She'd share first. She'd share until it was coming out of his ears .
* * *
The next afternoon, Rainbow Dash tracked Macintosh down.
That sounded much cooler than just ‘she flew around Sweet Apple Acres until she spotted his red coat through the trees’, but hey.
“Hey, Mac,” she said as she dropped to the ground nearby. “What’s up?”
“Not much. You?”
Rainbow inhaled. “Practice today stunk. We did so many ladders I thought my wings were going to fall off. And then Misty Fly got distracted and took out a flagpole and Spitfire made her do wingups for the rest of practice.”
Macintosh blinked, but then an easy smile slid on his face. “For that?”
“The Crystal Empire has flags everywhere . We’ve got a little derby coming up up there, and you gotta watch for all the poles or you’ll crash and burn in the middle of a show and that’s… bad.”
Macintosh smirked. “Eeyup.”
“Could be worse. Vanhoover’s stadium isn’t as bad flag-wise, but it’s so cold and windy there that they had to put a roof over it. It’s a tall roof; but it’s a roof. So we can’t do like half our moves, can’t do the Icaranian Sun Salutation; and a Sonic Rainboom is right out. I mean, I probably could get enough speed in there if I flew in a tight circle a few times first; but that’d blow out all the windows and probably send a few ponies to the hospital with pressure injuries, and that’d cost a lot more than I make.”
Macintosh nodded.
“You comfortable enough to share anything?” Rainbow invited.
Macintosh chuckled. “Not today,” he answered simply.
“That's fine,” Rainbow said. “I could go on a bit longer. I haven't even started on Yakyakistan yet. Their stadium is nice and huge; but the worst part about it? The toilets. Yaks are really huge, and they have huge butts, so if you try to sit on it you'll fall right through. You can't even stand, unless you're really tall and can do the splits; the seats are that wide. You've kinda got to do this kind of flying-slash-hovering pee thing. Spitfire complained, but they were all ‘But yak toilet perfect!’ and we were like ‘maybe but it's not perfect for ponies’ and they're all like ‘but yaks not ponies!’ and so they don't even give us anything and so we all do the hover pee. I mean, at least the minotaurs give us something. I bet they're just their foals’ training toilets; but at least they're trying, you know?”
Macintosh smiled peacefully. “Eeyup.”
“Minotaurs, though. Their cooking is kinda olive oil-y. It's supposed to be really healthy but it just gives us… well, let's just say on the train ride home, we have to have all the windows open.”
Macintosh chuckled.
Rainbow looked up, half expecting him to decide this was TMI. To her surprise, he seemed to be actively listening. She blinked.
Macintosh raised an eyebrow, as if inviting her to continue.
“You… you don’t mind this?” Rainbow asked.
Macintosh shrugged. “I like it. I get to know you a little bit better, what you like and what you don’t. And I like how you're comfortable enough to share.”
Rainbow blinked. She’d been so interested in trying to overwhelm Macintosh that she hadn’t even considered the possibility that he’d actually like it. “Thanks,” she said.
There was a short pause.
Macintosh rumbled. “Kinda wish I’d run the race with you.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“I dunno.”
“It’s ok. I wouldn’t want to race me, either.”
Macintosh chuckled. “Ain’t that. You just looked like you were having fun, just wanted to watch.”
Rainbow waggled her eyebrows. “Usually charge for that,” she said.
Macintosh snorted a laugh as he heard his own words reflected at him.
“No, really,” Rainbow said seriously. “Wonderbolt tickets are pretty pricey. I could totally slip you some under the table if you’re interested, though. Call it the friends and family discount.”
“Maybe someday,” Macintosh said, his tone slightly teasing.
“You’re just saying that because you’ve never gone,” Rainbow said. “I remember the first time I went to a Wonderbolts show. I mean, maybe it’s a bit different because I’m a pegasus pony; but when I saw them…” She sighed. “It was, like, a lightning bolt to my brain. They were so fast, so talented; they did these tight turns that I didn’t even think were possible. But they were, and I knew it, because I knew that one day, I’d do it, too. I’d be up there, flying for everypony to see, and they’d be cheering my name as I showed just how awesome I was. But seeing that… it gave me a purpose. Gave me a reason to actually try at flight school.” She pursed her lips. “Still got kicked out; but hey. I definitely tried.” She glanced up, somewhat surprised at how much had just come out of her mouth—and how ok she was with that.
Macintosh seemed to be ok with it, too. Was that… adoration in his eyes?
Rainbow realized that she had gotten where she’d wanted… and had made no plans past this point.
This lack of planning was getting to be a consistent problem.
She looked down and glanced around the orchard. “So, uh, I’ll see you around?” she offered. When Macintosh didn’t say anything, she nodded pleasantly, then turned to leave.
“Wait.”
It had been quiet, as if Macintosh had blurted it out before he had been sure it was a good idea; but Rainbow had heard. She slowed to a stop.
“I don’t… think Granny would mind if you stayed for dinner,” he managed.
Rainbow’s ears pricked up. “That’d be cool,” she said. “I don’t think I’d mind, either.”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Carousel Boutique was a wonderful place, really. Rarity ran a great shop, full of options.
So, so, so many options.
“Rarity, for the fourteenth time, I don’t care !”
Rarity pouted. “Darling, you really can’t expect to show up to the Hearth’s Warming Eve Gala wearing something that you don’t love?”
And those options seemed to just multiply like rabbits around holidays. Rainbow dragged her hooves down her face. “I love hayburgers, flying, and Daring Do books. Clothes, not so much.”
“And Macintosh. So I’ve heard, anyway.”
Rainbow scowled at her. “I will put your tail through your sewing machine,” she threatened.
“Please,” Rarity scoffed derisively. “You’d need a loom before anything like that would be a proper threat. Now, go on! Tell me which one you prefer! This one accents your eyes; but this one brings out that lovely orange in your mane and will look lovely on the trim of anything I make for Macintosh.”
Rainbow sighed, having long since abandoned any hope of a quick and easy exit from this place of fashion and pain. “Does it really matter?”
“It’s the Hearth’s Warming Eve Gala,” Rarity reiterated. “Anypony who is anypony is going to be there!”
“You know, you say that like I’m actually going to start caring about it,” Rainbow grumbled. “Remind me again why I can’t just wear my last gala dress?”
“You mean besides the fact that it’s from almost five seasons ago?”
“No, like, a legitimate reason.”
Rarity sighed patiently. “That is a very valid reason; but also because Macintosh’s coat is a different shade of red,” she tutted. “And they’d have to match, of course; but since I don’t want his outfit to clash too horrifically against his coat, I’ll have to go with something different entirely. So, eyes? Coat?”
Rainbow exhaled through her nose.
Rarity tried a different angle. “Which do you think would look better on your special somepony, then?”
“Ugh. We’re not even official,” Rainbow groused. “Can’t I just say ‘I trust your judgement’ and leave it at that?”
Rarity tittered. “That just makes it sound like you’re avoiding making a choice, darling.”
“Oh, good. We understand each other, then.”
Rarity suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. “Very well,” she said snippily. “I suppose I could flip a bit and leave the color your dress on the final, and one of the largest, events of the year up to chance.”
“Hold on, I think I’ve got one.” Rainbow demonstratively checked under her wings.
Rarity sighed again, but this time defeatedly. “We’ll go with the gold, then,” she said wearily. “Really, this would be the best option, considering your coats. Yes, this would make the perfect triad. Just be sure you stand next to him for most of the night.”
“Thank you, Rares,” Rainbow said with a hint of smugness. “You’re the best.”
“Hmf,” Rarity said, looking through her supplies for just the right shade of gold. She held one up to Rainbow’s face (covering it), and tossed it into a reject pile. “Well, I imagine Macintosh will be a right gentlecolt about all this,” she muttered irritably.
“Yeah. Because all you’re going to do is give him a vest and a tie because that’s all stallions need.”
“He’ll need a shirt, too,” Rarity pointed out.
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Please,” she said. “He’s already got one. Besides, I know Mac. He couldn’t give a flying feather about this party even if he’d been born the son of Commander Hurricane. He’s going for me and we’re probably going to leave early anyway.”
Rarity looked visibly affronted at this plan.
Rainbow continued. “Trust me. He’s gonna walk in here and get out in two minutes flat.”
* * *
Big Macintosh slid into the boutique, ducking his head as he passed through the door. He was a large stallion, with a beautiful rough coat and muscles any stallion would be proud of; but right now, he looked about as nervous as a young colt on his first date.
Rarity looked up. She was mildly surprised, but took it in stride. “Ah, Macintosh. Wonderful to see you,” she said warmly, trying to put him at ease. “I’m assuming you’re here for your Hearth’s Warming Eve Gala outfit?”
“Eeyup.”
“Not a problem. I must say, after a little further reflection, I believe these colors I’ve chosen are the perfect combination for both you and her. I dare say you’ll be the center of attention.”
Macintosh flinched. That didn’t sound like something he’d enjoy very much.
Rarity quickly backpedaled. “And by that, of course, I mean you’ll fit right in with everypony else!” She gave a nervous chuckle. “Except you’ll look better, of course.” She gave Macintosh her best winning smile.
Macintosh did not look reassured in the slightest.
“Oh, do try and relax,” Rarity said airily as she levitated her measuring tape and began her work. “If you’re tense, your measurements might be off a bit.”
Macintosh took a deep breath, held it, then let it out. It seemed to help him a bit, and Rarity continued her measurements.
“And with the vest and tie, that should be all. With a simple white shirt, everything comes together.” She smiled. “I do love it when that happens.”
“Could… could I get one of those, too?” Macintosh asked haltingly. “White shirt.”
Rarity blinked. “Of course, darling.”
“I’d like a nice one. I’m… hoping this is one night she’ll remember.”
Rarity’s eyes widened and her smile threatened to split her face apart. “Eeeeeee!” she squealed.
Macintosh winced.
Rarity quickly managed to bring herself under control. “Of course. Nothing but the best,” she promised. “I’ll need to take a sleeve measurement, too. Just give me a few days, and I’ll have it ready.”
Macintosh nodded and let her take the measurements she needed. A few more pleasantries later, and he was ready to go.
But as Macintosh shut the door behind him, the night was split once more by Rarity’s squee. Judging by the volume, she hadn’t even tried to suppress it. He shook his head. Rainbow Dash had some funny friends.
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Clean Sweep looked like she felt very out of place. Her mane had been done up, and she wore a lovely dress; but she kept scratching at the back of her neck, as if there were a pin slightly out of place pricking her, she kept picking up and setting down her forehooves in place, and her tail would not stop swishing.
Rainbow Dash noticed this instantly. She trotted up and cleared her throat. “Hey, Sweeps,” she greeted her.
Clean Sweep jumped. “Oh! Hi, Rainbow Dash.”
“Soarin not here yet?”
She wryly shook her head. “Said he might need to take something over to his grandmother’s house, but that he’d be here as soon as he could.”
Rainbow Dash happened to know that Soarin’s grandmother lived in a retirement village in Cloudsdale, and she also happened to know that the floating city of Cloudsdale was currently making the rounds somewhere near the Smokey Mountains, so it was very unlikely that he had gone there at all. But Clean Sweep looked nervous enough without knowing that, so she went with a much safer, “I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”
Clean Sweep pranced in place. “I hope so. It’s really cold out here.”
Thankfully, Soarin soon arrived, wearing a classic suit. He dropped to the ground and Clean Sweep nearly flattened him with the force of her greeting hug.
Rainbow recognized it instantly. It was one of the set they kept in the office in case of accidents and lawsuits. She met his eyes over Clean Sweep’s shoulder and just smirked . Grandmother, indeed. He'd just forgotten to set up his outfit before. He grimaced and gave a hopeful smile. Rainbow mimed a closing a zipper over her mouth, and Soarin visibly relaxed.
After a moment, they separated. Soarin retrieved a trio of roses from under his jacket. “Brought these for you.”
Clean Sweep brightened. “My favorite! You remembered!” She quickly ate one, looking more at ease already.
Soarin chuckled. “Nothing but the best for you,” he said. He held out his foreleg, and Clean Sweep paused for a moment before recognizing this gesture. A faint blush colored her cheeks (or was that from the cold?) and she accepted it. Gallantly, he escorted her up the stairs and past security.
Now Rainbow was the only one left. Well, not really. There were a few other ponies waiting out here, but most of them were just regular guests. And Clean Sweep had been right about at least one thing: it was really cold out here.
Rainbow Dash had almost decided to go for a quick fly to get some feeling back into her wings when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She spun around to see Macintosh, all dressed up in a vest and tie that matched her dress. He looked down sheepishly; but Rainbow found herself nodding in appreciation. He usually didn’t wear much of anything; the change was actually really nice. And it looked pretty good on him, too.
“Sorry I’m so late,” he apologized breathlessly. “Bunch of pigs got out and I had to help track them all down 'afore I could come.”
“It’s fine,” Rainbow said. “Now let’s get inside, before I freeze my wings off. You have our tickets, right?”
Macintosh froze. His jaw worked with wordless horror.
And then Rainbow chuckled, relieving him immensely. “I’ve got them, remember?” she said, holding them up. “One Wonderbolt plus one guest.” She leaned in and nudged him, as if sharing an inside joke. “You’re the plus one guest,” she stage-whispered.
Macintosh rolled his eyes, but he did smile as he followed her inside.
* * *
Macintosh glanced around. “Feel kinda out of place,” he admitted, pulling at the tie he wore.
Rainbow shrugged. “Yeah, you get used to it, being surrounded by ponies with more money than brains. Need proof?” She led him over to the refreshment table and pointed. “See? They’re the only ones who can get ‘or durve’ out of ‘hores devours’.” She scooped up one of the tiny sandwiches and popped it into her mouth, barely needing to chew before she could swallow. “Devours? More like devouring this whole table, amiright?”
Macintosh cracked a half smile.
Rainbow scooped up another and shoved that one in her mouth as well. “Better eat fast,” she warned, “or go find yourself someplace comfortable to stand. Because I’ve just about used up my two minutes of freedom, and-”
As she spoke, a very well-to-do-looking mare stepped behind her. “Dear me, is it Rainbow Splash?”
Rainbow Dash made eye contact with Macintosh just long enough to roll her eyes, and then spun around, putting on her Good Public Relations Dash persona. “In the feathers,” she said proudly, not bothering to correct her name.
“Oh, I saw you at the last Wonderbolts Derby. I must say, I do believe you’re aiming to become the fastest Wonderbolt Equestria has ever seen.”
Rainbow Dash shrugged lightly. “That’s my goal,” she said. “You know, altius volantis and all that.”
“Ah, yes. Ever faster.”
That was not what that phrase actually meant; but Rainbow didn’t feel like having that conversation, either.
As she continued talking, Rainbow noticed Macintosh slowly sneaking away. Oh, that she were that lucky… No, instead she got another pony coming up and introducing himself as a great fan and how much he enjoyed the Buccaneer Blitz from the last Derby and wouldn’t she sign this card he’d just so happened to bring along?
Eventually, she noticed that Soarin had also ended up nearby, fielding questions gallantly. Rainbow couldn’t help but grin. Nopony who saw him would ever think he would be the kind of stallion to shriek like a little filly when somepony (who had totally not been her) had put a fake spider in his locker.
At the next lull in the conversation, she leaned back. “So, where’s your date?” she whispered.
“Same place yours is,” he whispered back.
Rainbow gave him the stink-eye.
“No, really.” Soarin gestured with his head over towards the corner.
Rainbow glanced behind her to see Macintosh and Clean Sweep sitting at a table. They seemed to be involved in a rather deep conversation. “Huh,” she said. “Wonder what they’re talking about.”
“Probably pies,” Soarin said.
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “The world does not revolve around pies, Soarin.”
Way back in Ponyville, Pinkie Pie sneezed, startling little Pumpkin Cake.
“It should,” Soarin insisted. “They’re delicious. And Clean Sweep makes the greatest pies. Seriously. I’m thinking of taking it further.”
“You don’t marry somepony because of pies, Soarin,” Rainbow said with a grin.
“No; you marry somepony because they’re amazing. Because she makes me happy. Because I make her happy. Because she keeps me grounded and makes me soar at the same time.”
Rainbow blinked. “That’s… pretty deep.”
“And she makes great pies,” Soarin repeated.
Rainbow laughed and shook her head. “Again with the pie thing. You’re like a one-trick pony.”
Soarin ignored this. “Also, she's really hot. She just doesn't realize it because she's got no self-confidence. When she does get it, I bet she’ll be into some crazy things. It’s always the quiet ones.” He winked at her.
“Yeah, you need to stop talking,” Rainbow said flatly. “And I’m willing to bet feathers to flight plans that they’re talking about anything
Meanwhile, at the table, Clean Sweep rested her face in her hooves. “Crosshatching adds nothing to the pie! It’s extra work for less crust!”
“It’s for aesthetic.” Macintosh insisted. “It’s a physical expression of the love you put in it.”
“Physical shmysical,” Clean Sweep scoffed. “A pie is a pie because of how it tastes, not how it looks.”
“You eat with your eyes first,” Macintosh argued. “And if’n I didn’t like the way it looks, I ain’t gonna eat it.”
Clean Sweep rolled her eyes. “It’s a pie. It’s going to be delicious. Especially if I made it.”
Macintosh chuckled. “If you say so.”
* * *
Finally, the gala began winding down. Ponies began disappearing, and Rainbow found herself with a little more time alone. She spotted Soarin, walking with Clean Sweep up the stairs.
She had no sooner wondered where Macintosh had gotten off to when she heard something behind her. She turned to see him standing behind her, looking slightly awkward. “Rainbow Dash?”
“Yeah?”
He turned. “Come on. Something I want you to see.”
Rainbow raised an eyebrow, but Macintosh gave no further indications of his plans. So she followed.
Macintosh led her outside. The weather pegasi had just begun work on the snow, and the gentle, fat snowflakes made the night perfectly calm and quiet. Rainbow caught herself staring.
And maybe mentally judging the pegasi on their work. It was passable. But they did have a huge area to cover.
She turned back around to Macintosh. “So you brought me out to see snow?” she asked. “I mean, I like snow.” Her eyes narrowed. “Did you want to start a snowball fight?”
Macintosh chuckled. “Nah. I just wanted to make it official somewhere special.”
“Make what official?” Rainbow asked.
Macintosh dipped his head. “Miss Rainbow, would you be my very special somepony?”
Rainbow’s heart stopped, and the world seemed to slow around her.
This is what she’d wanted, right? Yeah. It had been. And now it was here. It was hers. He was offering. WIth one word, one simple word, she, too, could join the ranks of ponies that could proudly state that she had a very special somepony.
But is that what she really wanted? This had somewhat all started with a simple misunderstanding and had converted into a matter of pride. It had been fun playing with him and teasing him, yeah; but now it was serious. He was actually asking her out. All she had to do was say ‘yes’.
She couldn’t do that to him. He’d been honest with her; she needed to return the favor. Macintosh was a good pony. He was honest, kind, really strong. Fast, too, when he wanted to be. He had hopes and dreams, and things he kept hidden from the world. He was easy to talk to. She never felt judged by anything he said. And he loved his apples.
He was…
Exactly the kind of pony she’d want to date.
“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said, a smile spreading across her face. “That would be awesome.”
Macintosh grinned.
But as the world faded back in, she heard some ponies laughing. She looked up and suddenly recognized some of the pegasi flying overhead.
And they were swooping down to say hi. Hoops and Score came first, with Dumb-bell following behind.
Of course they were here. Because why the hay not. How did these idiots even get tickets to this thing, anyway?
They landed nearby, and Rainbow started first. “Macintosh, some idiots from flight camp,” she introduced them. “Idiots from flight camp, this is Macintosh.”
Macintosh nodded politely. “Evening.”
He was the only one to try for civility. “Nice try, Rainbow Crash,” Hoops started.
“We heard it all,” Score gloated.
“Told you you didn’t have a special somepony,” Hoops crowed. “What, did you have to pay him to say that to you?”
Rainbow narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth to retort; but before she could, Dumb-bell dope slapped Hoops upside his head. Her jaw dropped and her eyes widened instead.
It wasn’t just her. All the pegasi seemed to be dumbstruck. Macintosh, not understanding the context, merely observed, more confused than shocked.
“You're a loser, Hoops,” Dumb-bell growled. “Rainbow Crash is getting something good in her life, and you just gotta try and poop all on her parade, huh? Colt, what's wrong with you?”
“Dumb-bell…” Hoops growled back.
“Don't you ‘Dumb-bell’ me,” he spat. “Dude, just grow up, ok? It's like you're obsessed with her. Let her have her good thing. She made it to the Wonderbolts; you're still working for your dad because nopony else wants to put up with your horseapples; and you’re only here because your grandma knows somepony.”
“Dumb-bell…?”
Dumb-bell shoved his hoof away. “You know what? I'm done with you. I'm here, I’m all dressed up, and I'm going to have me a good time.” Leaving behind the others, he stepped inside and nodded at the nearest mare. “How you doin’?” he asked in what was clearly supposed to pass for a smooth pickup line.
A nearby waiter uncomfortably cleared his throat. “Ah, sir?” he said, adjusting his bow tie. “That would be a statue.”
“I'm sure it's smarter than those two idiots,” he retorted. He glanced back at the statue. “So, you come here often?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows.
The waiter bit his lower lip, unsure if he were amused or disturbed. “I doubt she ever leaves, sir.”
“Ooh, then I bet you've got all kinds of good stories,” he said eagerly. “Spiiill!”
The other two slowly backed away. “Eh, we don't need him, anyway,” Hoops said slowly.
“Nah. Not at all.”
And then, in a flurry of wings, Macintosh and Rainbow Dash were alone again.
They looked at each other. The silent question of ‘now what?’ rang in the air.
Rainbow Dash finally broke the silence. “So, special somepony , last time my friends and I went to a gala, we left early and got donuts and hot chocolate. You in?”
Macintosh grinned. “Eeyup.”
* * *
As Rainbow Dash had remembered, the donuts were delicious. But this time, instead of being with her friends and Princess Celestia, she was just with Big Macintosh. Her special somepony.
She could get used to this.
And one of the benefits of being in a booth meant more privacy, which meant more time to talk. Macintosh started. “I didn't like the party,” he said bluntly.
“It wasn't bad,” Rainbow said. “I mean, I'd much rather spend Hearth’s Warming Eve with my friends; but it could have been worse.”
Mac raised an eyebrow.
“Grand Galloping Galas. Longer, stuffier, and much more boring.”
Mac smiled. He remembered the times Applejack had gone. “And you have to go to all of them?”
“Yep. Two words.” She held up her hooves to frame them. “Contractually. Obligated.”
Mac raised an eyebrow.
“It's a long story,” Rainbow explained, shoving another donut in her mouth. “But basically if Celestia throws a party and wants us to be there, we have to go, yes or yes.”
Mac snorted.
“I know, right? And, like, no offense; but most of these guys are unicorns and can barely tell the difference between a Buccaneer Blaze and a simple double aileron roll with a tail tuck. It’s like, wasted talent, really. Give me a family crowd any day. Somepony who actually cares.”
“Eeyup.”
“Somepony who knows my favorite moves, somepony who knows what year I was born, somepony who doesn’t care that I dropped out of flight school; somepony who actually knows my name .”
Macintosh grinned. “Rainbow Splash.”
“Yeah. Rainbow Splash . And it’s not the first time. It’s not that hard of a name to remember! Ugh. Ok, so first time it happened from some ‘loyal fan’ about a month ago, called me Rainbow Flash . I mean, at first I liked the speedy-sounding nickname; but then the team somehow got their hooves on a bunch of flash powder and kept lighting it off in the locker room. ‘Rainbow’-” here she held up a hoof, as if holding the powder, as the other pointed to an imaginary Rainbow Dash, then scuffed her hooves together, miming lighting the imaginary powder by the spark from the quick contact of her horseshoes. “-flash,” she finished. “Surprise thought it was hilarious, busted up laughing every time somepony did it; so of course they kept doing it just to set her off again. Whole locker room smelled like bad eggs by the end of the week. And Spitfire was stuck doing paperwork in her office over the weekend, so she was pretty peeved.”
Macintosh couldn’t help but chuckle. “Eeyup.”
“She puts up with a lot of horseapples, really. I don’t know how they’re going to replace her when she retires, and I don’t know who else would want her job. You know, Luna's working on putting a team together now. The Shadowbolts, she's calling them. I don't know how much of an audience they're going to get starting their shows at midnight, but hey. Maybe they can do some of the parties. If it were up to me, I’d never hit up another party again.”
Macintosh grunted. “Sorry to hear that.”
“Why’s that?”
“There's another party coming up in a couple weeks, was wonderin’ if you'd like to come.”
“Oh, yeah? Which one?” Rainbow asked. And how did you get an invitation?
“Ain't got a really fancy name; we just call it the Apple Family Reunion.”
Rainbow's ears pricked up. That was a good explanation. She'd only ever heard of these. “And special someponies are invited?” she asked to confirm.
“Eeyup.”
Rainbow smiled widely. “Then I'm in.”
* * *
The gala had finally ended, and ponies were cleaning up. Princess Celestia stood on a high balcony overlooking the ballroom, her lips slightly pursed. She would gladly have helped clean up; but princesses were not supposed to do such things. If she'd tried, she'd probably set off a chain of heart attacks all across her castle. Therefore, she supposed, such sacrifices needed to be made for the good of all Equestria.
A little smile played at her face as she heard her assistant step in. “Well, Raven, I suppose it was a good Hearth’s Warming Eve party?”
“As good as any,” Raven answered diplomatically.
Celestia chuckled, then got back down to business. “So, what's the damage?”
Raven consulted her clipboard. “As of first count, we're down thirty dinner plates, seventeen salad bowls, forty-four wine glasses, thirteen water glasses, and possibly a silverware set…”
Celestia chuckled. She suspected she knew exactly who that had been, and had taken the liberty of pre-enchanting their set to attract roaches. “Then we had a good year,” she said pleasantly.
Raven looked at her clipboard again. “Damage to the gardens is estimated at fifteen hundred bits…”
“Then it was a good year,” Celestia said, honestly surprised at this low number.
“And we've got four nobles too drunk to communicate cooling off in the holding corral.”
Celestia grinned. Some of their distant ancestors had won their noble titles over drinking contests she’d held. Oh, how the mighty had fallen.
Raven pursed her lips at the next line written on her clipboard. “And… well, we're not sure how to classify this next one…”
Celestia’s ears pricked up. That was an interesting development. Her ears pricked up even further at a sound of a commotion outside.
Raven noticed it, too. She leaned over the railing and pointed. “It's that.”
Celestia looked down along her hoof and saw a black pegasus stallion, holding tightly onto a statue of a young mare, with no fewer than three guards attempting to pull him off as two more attempted to hold down the statue.
“No! No!” the pegasus cried. “You don't understand our love! Marble, I won't let them separate us!”
“It's a sandstone statue, featherbrain!” one of the guards shouted.
“Marble!” he repeated. “Marble!”
With a Herculean effort, the guards finally managed to separate the two, and the black pegasus scrabbled desperately against the ground to get back to the statue. “No! No! Distance doesn't matter, for our love is true! I'll come back for you, Marble! I swear it!” He threw his head back towards the heavens as he was dragged out and shouted, “I swear iiiit!”
Celestia blinked as she watched the guards drag him away. “Yes,” she said calmly. “That is a new one.”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash and Macintosh lay under the stars, curled up so Rainbow could rest her head on his stomach as he rested his foreleg around her barrel. This had been found to be the most comfortable position, and many, many deep conversations had been had in this position.
This one, though, happened to be more of a pregame discussion.
“Ok, so for the reunion tomorrow, eat slow, because we’ll be eating all day; don’t worry about everypony’s names because they’re all going to introduce themselves, and everypony’s going to want to see me.”
“Eeyup,” Macintosh said.
“Fair enough,” Rainbow Dash said airily. “I’m already the greatest attraction the Wonderbolts have. It’ll be just a normal day for me.”
Macintosh chuckled, a low rumbling sound.
“I’m serious!” Rainbow protested. “We did a photoshoot yesterday, and they’re putting me on the new international poster. Top corner.”
Macintosh nudged her. “Congratulations,” he said.
Rainbow sighed. “Ready for tomorrow?”
“Nope.”
“No?”
Macintosh sighed. “Ain’t the best in social situations.”
“You sing on stage,” Rainbow pointed out. “You’re singing tomorrow.”
“That ain’t social,” Macintosh argued. “That’s sharing a talent. Socialness is when ponies I ain’t seen in a dog’s age show up and say somethin’ like…” And here he put on a rather good impression of a doting female family member, complete with raised pitch and lilted inflection, “‘Oh, Macintosh, it’s so good to see you’ve done so well for yourself! Now, when can we expect grandfoals?’”
Rainbow blinked as horrifying images flashed through her head. “Macintosh?”
“Eeyup?”
“Hold me.”
“Eeyup.”
* * *
Thankfully, the reunion did not turn out nearly as bad as Rainbow’s nightmares had made it out to be. There were ponies everywhere, most seemed perfectly happy to meet their relatives. Apple Bloom got tackled by a filly with a reddish mane, Granny Smith fell in line with other ponies who looked as old as her, and Applejack mostly looked happy that she wasn’t in charge of it this year.
But once the basic introductions were made, she became a target.
“Is she your special somepony?”
“Eeyup.”
“She's beautiful, Mac!”
“Eeyup,” Macintosh said, rubbing against Rainbow.
“I’m so happy for you!”
Rainbow glared as he left. “That’s the seventh time. They do know I'm standing right here, right?”
“Eeyup,” Macintosh answered. “But I've been single so long, everypony thought it'd never happen. And now here I am with the awesomest mare in Ponyville.”
“You just hadn't met the right pony yet,” Rainbow said, trying to hide a smile.
“Oh, I'd met her; just didn't know how good she'd be for me.”
Rainbow grinned. “Thanks, big guy,” she said, nudging him.
There was a brief pause.
“She’s beautiful, Mac!”
“Eeyup.”
Rainbow fought the urge to facehoof.
* * *
Rainbow glanced around. “Is it just me, or are there some ponies that aren’t exactly thrilled to see me?” She looked back, and then glanced around at the distinct lack of pegasi there, and suddenly felt somewhat self-conscious. “I- is it the wings?”
“Nope,” Macintosh said, sidestepping around an earth pony foal being chased by a young unicorn. “Let's just say there's a lot of bets that got lost this year. So if'n you see a couple ponies in dresses tomorrow, that's why.”
Rainbow considered this for a moment, and then her jaw dropped. “Wait. Ponies are betting on your love life?!”
Macintosh shrugged. “Eeyup.”
Rainbow Dash scowled. “That’s horseapples. What, are you a prime target just because you’re a big stallion who’s been single for a while?”
Macintosh chuckled. “You’re cute when you’re angry.”
Rainbow Dash scowled harder. She reached behind her to the food table and stuffed an entire apple fritter in her mouth. “How’s this for cute?” she demanded, spraying fritter crumbs everywhere.
Macintosh raised an eyebrow, said nothing… and then reached behind her for a fritter. Without breaking eye contact with her, he, too, shoved the entirety of the fritter in his mouth.
And the silent challenge had been offered. Rainbow retaliated with another. Macintosh copied. And pretty soon a crowd started to gather.
* * *
“Spitfire’s going to hang my wings on her wall for that when I get back,” Rainbow groaned.
“Eeyup,” Macintosh said softly. They'd been forced to declare it a draw when the table had run out of apple fritters. This was, all things considered, probably the best possible outcome.
“What's in those things, anyway?” Rainbow had to ask. “They're delicious.”
“Love. And about three sticks of butter.”
“So worth it,” Rainbow said, rubbing the side of her stomach.
Oddly enough, word had spread of their little contest, and Rainbow Dash suddenly found herself part of the conversation, able to share a little about herself. Apparently, that little exhibition had made the ponies decide that now, she was one of them. Phrases like ‘she's beautiful, Mac!’ gave way to ‘Mac's a great pony!’ and ‘hope he can keep up with you!’
Rainbow Dash had just finished explaining an Icaranian Sun Salutation when Macintosh returned, smiling wide.
“What?” Rainbow demanded.
In answer, Macintosh held out a large mug of cider.
And really, when presented with cider, there is only one real choice.
She took it and drained it in one shot. The ponies chuckled around her. One even stomped a few times.
Rainbow grinned as she looked around, and that grin only widened when Macintosh revealed that he had brought two . She quickly repeated her previous performance, and the ponies cheered and laughed again. She looked around as she wiped the excess off her lips with her foreleg. It just seemed so friendly, so natural here. You know, I could really get used to being an Apple.
Author's Note
Roll credits
City gears keep turning
Well, we've got some ponies that can fly, now.
Our sweet home Equestria
In Ponyville we love our princess. True, true, true
Our sweet home Equestria
Now Applejack, she guards the Acres
Our Sweet Home Equestria
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Early morning in Canterlot castle was always a bustle of activity. The morning cleaning crew worked quickly and efficiently to get the entire castle presentable. Even rooms that didn't see daily use, such as the ballroom, were still subject to thorough cleanings.
“Ugh. Why are there always white stains on this statue?” She glanced around just to briefly confirm before continuing, “And just on this statue?”
“Birds?” her partner suggested.
“In the castle? I doubt it. And besides, if there were, there'd be white spots everywhere, not just here.”
Her companion considered this, and then nodded. “Yeah, that is weird. You think the night guard saw anything?”
“I dunno. You know, I heard it's a new guy in this wing.”
“I heard that, too,” a third mare interjected. “Just started this week. Dumb-bell or something, they call him.”
“Well, he'd better start not living up to his name here pretty soon, or I'm going to shove this sponge down his throat.”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
In the crusader clubhouse, two crusaders were sitting at the table, having a somewhat intense discussion.
“Ok, so you and Rainbow Dash are technically sisters,” Apple Bloom said slowly. “So she’s getting married to my brother, so that means she's my sister-in-law, and so Mac's your brother-in-law. And so that makes us…” Her voice trailed off, and she scratched the back of her neck. “Cousins?” she guessed.
“I don't think so,” Scootaloo said. “Cousins are kids of aunts and uncles, not brothers.”
“Second cousins?”
Scootaloo made a face. “I don't even know what that means.”
“Third cousins once removed?”
“Now you're just making things up,” Scootaloo accused.
Apple Bloom scowled. “Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
They glared at each other. “Fine. We'll ask somepony else,” Apple Bloom said. She stuck her head all the way out the window. “Hey, Big Mac!” she called.
Macintosh glanced up.
“When you marry Rainbow Dash, what’ll that make me and Scootaloo family-wise?”
Mac chuckled. “Technically, you won’t be.”
“Aww,” Apple Bloom said dejectedly.
“Hey, now. Family ain't who you're related to…” he started.
Apple Bloom sighed. “It's who you make it with,” she finished. “I know, I know. Fine.”
Mac waited until Apple Bloom had turned to go back inside before answering. “But you can be honorary sisters,” he suggested.
Their ears pricked up.
“Honorary sisters. I like the sound of that,” Scootaloo said, nodding.
Apple Bloom cheered. “New sister!” And she reached out and grabbed Scootaloo in a tight hug.
“Ugh! No hugging! Apple Bloom, let go! I don't care if we're-! Let-! Apple Bloom !”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Clean Sweep inhaled, held it, and slowly exhaled. Oh, this was a terrible idea! Why had she even agreed to this? “For Soarin,” she reminded herself quietly as she adjusted her little green hat. Taking another deep breath to steel herself, and then another, she closed her eyes, swallowed her nervousness, and pushed open the closet door and emerged, hoping she was emanating more confidence than she felt. She tipped her hat and stuck a hoof behind one of her green suspenders. “Hi there!” she announced cheerfully, her voice only shaking the tiniest bit. “I'm Strawberry Filly!” She slowly turned around, under the loose guise of showing off her outfit; but the real Strawberry Filly probably wouldn't have been making sure that her tail was shifted to one side ever so slightly, not enough to expose but definitely enough to tease.
When she'd finished spinning, she glanced up at Soarin to see his reaction.
He was staring, unblinking and slack-jawed at her. He slowly licked his lips. And, judging by the impressive span of his wings and the new sizable bulge in the blanket, he was appreciating the show.
A new surge of confidence coursed through her, and she trotted forward, now swishing her tail. Slowly, deliberately, she climbed onto the bed. “There's something I've been needing help with,” she said. She leaned forward and, gently, with her teeth, pulled the blanket away. Her eyes widened, but she quickly got back into character. “And I need a big, strong stallion to do it. Can you help me, Strawberry Buddy?”
Soarin nodded, quickly and eagerly.
She slowly turned around and bent over. “I need some help… putting cream on my strawberries. Do you think you cou-? Ahh ! Ngh~! Soarin, you're… hah … mmhm… don't stop! Don't stop ! Soarin, make me your Strawberry Mare!”
A Matter of Pride and Honor
Rainbow Dash was on an important mission. Flying high above the ground, she scanned the orchards, scouring the fields for Macintosh. Unfortunately, he was nowhere to be seen. She frowned. Her travels took her over almost the whole orchard and finally back to the farmhouse. Using her skills, she deduced that he must be inside.
But there was an easy answer to this. She dropped to the ground, faced the house, threw back her head, and yelled, “MAAAAAC!”
“Eeyup?”
She spun around to see Macintosh, outside, reclining on the porch swing, with a large pitcher of lemonade next to him. Rainbow chuckled sheepishly. “Oh, hey. Didn’t see you there.”
Macintosh grinned. “Wasn’t hiding. What, you can’t remember what your boyfriend looks like?”
Rainbow scowled playfully as she pulled out what she’d brought. “Don’t give me that, or I won’t give you the book,” she threatened, holding it up.
Macintosh nearly fell face-first off the swing. “You’re done already?!”
“Couldn’t put it down,” Rainbow answered with a wide grin. “Trust me. You’re gonna love this one.”
Macintosh scrambled over and took it. He looked at the cover. “Can’t wait,” he breathed.
Rainbow waited as he opened the front cover. His eyes widened as he read the words inside.
To Macintosh. Congrats on catching the Rainbow!
He looked up. “You got… you got A. K. Yearling to sign it for me?” he said weakly.
“Yeah,” Rainbow said with an easy shrug. “Figured I could. And she owed me a favor.” She snorted a laugh. “Actually, that's only kinda true. We've crossed paths often enough that she sends me an advance copy of every book now. But yeah. Figured you'd like that.”
“Eeyup,” Macintosh said, still looking reverently at the inscription.
Rainbow paused to give him a few more moments with it, and then gently nudged him again. “So, now that my reading list is all cleared, I don’t suppose you’ve got another book to suggest? Maybe something… written locally?”
Macintosh looked up. It took him a moment to understand, and when he did, he just chuckled. “You know, I never could finish that,” he said. “Had the world all set up; but had trouble with getting him to go to the main city.”
“I have some experience with that,” Rainbow said eagerly. “You want me to take a look at it?”
Macintosh cracked a smile. “Eeyup.”
