Author's Note

Inspired by this funny picture: https://derpibooru.org/images/693361

How to be a Goddess (Twilight, Roseluck, micro humans)

Version: 1

Roseluck stepped into the Golden Oaks library with a nervous glance behind her, as though afraid somepony was following her. Twilight was excited about the arrival of a customer. Though she was also a bit confused by the flower pony's behavior.

"Welcome Roseluck!" Twilight greeted the mare warmly, setting aside her current reading.

The cream colored earth pony awkwardly closed the door before timidly approaching the librarian. "Hello Twilight."

"What can I help you with today?" Twilight's smile was feeling a bit forced now.

Roseluck stopped on the other side of the center table. She stood there for a moment. Scratched an itch on her left foreleg. Then cleared her throat. "Do you... uh... do you have any books about... uh... the old... pony gods?"

Twilight blinked at her. "Yes, I do have one," the violet unicorn replied simply. She stood, shuffled over to one side of the library, and began scanning the shelf for the only book she had on the subject. "Not many ponies talk about the gods anymore," Twilight added conversationally. "Fascinating stuff."

"Yeah," was Roseluck's entire response.

Twilight could feel the weight of this mystery settling on her shoulders. A possible friendship problem? How did the pony gods, the oldest myths in the pony world, fit into the mare's troubles?

Twilight's magenta magic grabbed the aged and weathered tome, pulling it free from the shelf. "Soooo," Twilight droned, "what made you want to read about the gods?" Immediately Twilight wanted to face-hoof. She could have tried to be more subtle. Obviously the problem was embarrassing to Roseluck or at least made her uncomfortable. Just asking her outright? Smooth. As. Sandpaper.

The mare looked off to the side and coughed into a hoof. "I need to know... what it... means... to be a goddess."

Twilight paused mid-step, book levitating beside her head. "Pardon?"

Roseluck sighed in resignation. "I need to know how a goddess is supposed to act. So, I thought, maybe how the pony gods acted would give me some good ideas."

Twilight blinked. "Is this for a play or...?"

"No," the earth pony said quickly and shook her head.

Twilight reached the table and put the book down in front of her customer. "Then why do you need to know how to act like a god?"

Rose ran her hooves over the cover. "A swarm of tiny creatures called 'humans' appeared in my garden. They keep calling me their goddess and insist on worshiping me. I'm not sure what else to do."

The unicorn's jaw dropped. What Roseluck had just said was insane. Nonsensical. "Your garden is infested with bugs that can talk?"

Roseluck opened her mouth to say something but hesitated. Then shrugged. "I'm pretty sure they're not bugs Twilight. Calling an exterminator would be wrong. So they have to stay. But if they're going to keep calling me a goddess..." her eyes gravitated to the book.

Twilight could feel her left eye twitching. "You're going to... act like a goddess? For a bunch of talking bugs?"

Her red mane bounced as she giggled. "It does sound silly. And as much as it makes me nervous, I'm also really excited. Having a bunch of little 'humans' calling me their goddess? It could be fun."

Twilight could only gape at the mare. Was this a prank by Pinkie Pie? Had Discord broken free again? What weird unfathomable world had she fallen into!? None of this conversation had made any sense at all!