The Immortal's Burdenby DuskPhoenixChaptersGetting Only Half of the StoryStart Believing in MiraclesNon puto, igitur, ego sum nobiliApparently Dishonesty is the Best PolicyGetting Only Half of the Story"In half?" Twilight and Spike both flinched at the concern and incredulity in Celestia's voice. Twilight scuffed a hoof against the marble floor before Celestia's throne, looking at Spike out of the corner of her eye. Spike raised his paws, stepping back a bit and shaking his head. Twilight bit her lip, not quite meeting Celestia's gaze. "Yes. Uh, in half." Twilight squirmed in the silence that followed. "Cleanly bifurcated," she added a bit softer, hoping that Celestia would say something, or at least move a bit. Neither of those things happened, so she continued with a small cough, "thoroughly trunca-" She cut herself off with an eyebrow raised. "Princess, are you okay?" Celestia did not immediately respond, for she was performing the Royal Double Facehoof, a gesture of such resigned frustration that every guard in the room suddenly sat down in emphatically felt weariness. Twilight took a tentative step closer to Celestia. "Uh, Princess?" "Twilight Sparkle," Celestia spoke suddenly, her tone endlessly patient, "you are the only pony I have ever known who would ask me if I am well immediately after informing me that you have been cleaved in twain." Twilight didn't quite have anything to respond to that. She shared a nervous look with Spike and instinctively felt her torso. There wasn't even a scar or a raised mark where the slice had been made. "Well," Twilight ventured, "I got better." "Indeed." Celestia responded dryly, before quickly regaining her regal and caring tone with a small cough. "And how exactly did you..." Celestia's face barely changed, but Twilight's years of studying with the princess let her know that she was struggling to put the situation into a coherent form. "How did you pull yourself together?" Spike spoke up nervously. "Uh, I saw it happen. She kinda just healed together on her own." His nose wrinkled in disgust. "It was actually really disturbing. There was a lot of these crunching and squelching noises, and I think Fluttershy passed out." Celestia blinked. "Right," she just barely managed to retain a neutral tone, "unconsciousness aside, are your friends who were with you okay?" Twilight nodded. "They're a bit banged up, but fine." Celestia nodded in return. "Then it seems our first order of business will be some explanations." She rose from her throne, making her way to the back door as her guards followed a bit behind her. "Please, follow me." Celestia called back to Twilight. Spike hopped on Twilight's back and the two followed Celestia up to Luna's tower, where she graciously dismissed both her and Luna's guards. She gave Twilight a thin smile. "I shall only be a moment." Celestia assured, ducking into the room. Twilight leaned close to the door, but she couldn't hear anything. She frowned. Of course there'd be silencing spells on the princess' chambers. She leaned back in disappointment, but Spike scrutinized the door closer. "Aren't there any spells that'll let us hear what they're saying?" Spike asked. Twilight rubbed her foreleg nervously. "Well, yeah, there are. But no matter how horribly curious we are, wouldn't that be a rude and unfriendly thing to do?" She pointed out. Spike nodded, stroking his chin and sitting with his feet almost touching the door as he looked it over. Twilight sat patiently, calmly, and most of all, politely. For five seconds. As soon as the spell was cast, Twilight and Spike could hear Celestia just as she finished saying something. They both leaned closer to the door, straining to hear. "It is indeed quite noble of Fluttershy to have attempted to calm the beast," Luna said, "but surely a creature like that could not be reasoned with. How is it that she escaped injury?" "Apparently, Twilight pushed her out of the way just in time." Luna gasped slightly. "How did dear Twilight avoid injury then?" "Well," Celestia said, her tone betraying no emotion, "according to what she told me, she was quite simply cut in half." The silence in the room was deafening. Twilight sat for a moment, and tapped her horn. Had the spell cut out? "In half." Luna finally spoke. "Yes." Celestia responded. "Hemisected." "Correct." "Divaricated." "Indeed." "Furc-" "Okay I am not in the mood to deal with this." Celestia interrupted. There was another pause, followed by Luna chuckling slowly. "Ah. Dear sister, centuries may separate us, but your penchant for pranking remains unchanged." Luna laughed. Her laughter awkwardly faded away. Silence once again returned, settling over the two eavesdroppers like a blanket made of anvils, but not preventing them from leaning further towards the door. "What?!" Luna screeched. "I know!" Celestia shouted in return. "She just..." Luna made a very undignified squelching noise. "Indeed! But she got better!" "Better?!" Luna's tone held nothing but confusion. "Better! She's right outside the door!" "Sister, our staff just mopped these floors!" "Alright, that is not at all what I meant." Celestia said, her tone disgusted. "Wow. No. I did not drag my student's physical halves all the way up the stairs. She's very well and not currently in two pieces." A long series of confused noises and half formed exclamations tumbled out of Luna's mouth, ending in an incredibly deep breath. Luna breathed deeply and rhythmically for a moment, Celestia waiting in silence all the while. "So then," Luna eventually managed, "it's alright, the incident is contained entirely to the Element Bearers who were present at the time, nopony else probably observed their battle deep in the Everfree, and we can contain these unexpected effects from public knowledge." Luna breathed deeply one last time, sounding much more calm. "Pray tell, who else aside from Fluttershy and Spike were present?" "Rainbow Dash and Rarity." Celestia blankly responded. Silence once again fell over Twilight and Spike while they leaned even closer to the door. "We are doomed." Luna deadpanned. "Undoubtedly." At this point physics remembered that it shouldn't be possible for an alicorn and a dragon to be leaning at a seventy degree angle against a door without pushing it open, and Twilight and Spike both tumbled to the floor at Celestia's hooves. Spike groaned dizzily, and Twilight attempted an innocent smile. "Uh," Twilight began with a small cough, "so you see, we were... well we weren't quite... it wasn't really-" "You were eavesdropping." Celestia stated. "Yeah we were eavesdropping." Twilight said defeatedly. "So what was that about being doomed?" "Twilight, as it would happen, immortality brings with it some rather peculiar consequences." Luna explained. "Some such consequences lie outside of the self, and instead reside in the hearts and minds of those who trust in immortals such as us. While we may remain like stone pillars of timeless power and security, those around us rise and fall as if they were pillars of sand moved by the winds of time. When one rises from mortality into a higher state of being like you have, and the ponies at large discover it, the effect on the national morale is astonishing in its weight." Twilight and Spike both stared at each other, then back at Luna. Both of their heads bobbed up and down in slow nods. "If everyone knows you're immortal now, you'll be paradoxically hounded by ponies trying to alleviate your suffering." Celestia translated blithely. "Oh." Twilight kept nodding for a second, the movement slowly morphing into confusion. "Wait, my suffering?" "We would be wise to explain this to you at a later time, after the crisis of which we speak has been averted." Luna said gravely. "For now, it is imperative that we find Rainbow Dash and Rarity before they can speak of your immortality to anypony, if such an outcome can still be avoided." Twilight waved a hoof and smiled. "Oh, princess, have a bit of faith! I'm sure they haven't spoken a word about it." Rarity burst into the spa so quickly that the doors both slammed into the opposite wall. She took a deep breath, and tilted her head back in a yell. "OH DO I EVER HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU, DARLINGS!" Twilight laughed quietly to herself, stopping when she realized it sounded a whole lot more defeated than she had meant it to. "Yeah okay all of Ponyville probably knows by now." Twilight sighed. "Probably a lot of Canterlot too." Spike added. Twilight shot him a withering look, to which he shrugged in response. "What? I'm just saying what we're all thinking." Celestia frowned. "We must hope that the news is not that widespread yet. For now, I believe we may be able to contain the situation if we act before the newspapers can get ahold of the story." With that, the three princesses and one dragon set off. Author's Note Thanks for reading! Start Believing in Miracles"Ponyfeathers," Celestia swore, staring down the newsstand on the main road and ignoring the slightly fearful looks the owner was giving her, "it seems the news remains the fastest force we know." Twilight grabbed a paper and frowned. Every paper featured some variation of the headline Twilight Sparkle Faces Inspiring Struggle With Immortality, more information on page c3. "Inspiring struggle with immortality?" She read, bewildered. "I'm not struggling with it, I only just discovered it this morning!" Twilight looked up at Celestia and Luna, who were in the middle of sharing an unreadable look. "Twilight," Celestia began slowly, "Equestria is a great nation, and its ponies are prosperous. We have an overabundance of food, magic, and vaguely shaped modern art. This is in large part because of how we stick together as a whole. Our order and our consistency are what we are known for." Celestia sighed lightly, her head lowering a bit. "Unfortunately, that means big changes can cause mass reactions like this." Luna put a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Our little ponies will attempt to understand your immortality by empathizing with how they think it will affect you. Everypony has their own way of going about it, and now that your immortality is so widespread, everypony will act soon to curry your favor or encourage you. Truly, most will believe their work noble and a great aid to you." Twilight's ears folded back slowly. "Everypony is going to try to talk to me?" Celestia nodded. "Talk to you, give you gifts, recite you poems, and all at once probably." She patted Twilight's back. "And they'll continue with commendable determination, most likely for many days." Celestia turned back towards the castle. "We should probably leave now and get you someplace in the castle with a lot of guards so you don't get cornered by nobles. You are welcome to stay in the castle for as long as you wish, and please do not hesitate to contact Luna or I if you find yourself stuck." Celestia stepped forwards, and suddenly noticed Twilight's lack of response. "Twilight?" Twilight was as stiff as a board, her eyes impossibly wide and her mane slowly standing up in random places. Spike looked at her in concern, tentatively waving a paw before her eyes. After a moment, he poked her in the side. She didn't even twitch. Spike sighed. "I'll go get the wheelbarrow." He muttered. Spike stood on the bedstand to get a better look out the window at the courtyard below. He let out a low whistle at the sight of the growing throng of ponies attempting to enter the castle. "Wow, looks like a lot of ponies are showing up to see you." He chuckled. "Hey, maybe you could hold a day court." Twilight responded by continuing to breathe rapidly into a paper bag. Spike jumped up on the bed she was curled up on, rolling his eyes. "Twilight, come on," Spike said, "it's not as bad as you're thinking. So a few ponies are coming to wish you a happy eternity." Spike looked back out the window. "Uh, so a fair bit of ponies are coming to wish you... So a lot of ponies are... A sea of ponies... Hey is that Discord?" Spike gulped, closing the window and pulling the curtains quickly. "Uh, nevermind. I think trying to encourage you just discouraged me." Suddenly, a loud crash came from the hall. Twilight and Spike both jumped in surprise, and threw themselves under the bedsheets in a meager attempt to hide. Just as they did, the door was flung open. A swarm of ponies all dressed in robes entered the room, circling around the bed. Twilight looked into the hall with a gasp to see the guards had been tied up and were lying on their backs while looking slightly upset. She pulled Spike close to her protectively, and threw off the sheets. "Stay back, all of you!" Twilight yelled with wings flared, lighting her horn and levitating a shield of books in front of her. After a moment of hearing nothing, she peaked over her book palisade. Every single one of the robed ponies was bowing down. Twilight stared blankly at them, folding her wings back and shifting uncomfortably as she lowered her books. "Uh. C-can you stop that?" Twilight asked nervously. Immediately every single pony shot to their hooves. "Of course, your majesty." A taller grey unicorn said earnestly. "Anything you command." Twilight frowned deeply. Spike looked out from Twilight's close hold on him. "Hey can you command to have a tray of gems?" He asked. Twilight shot him an incredulous look, to which Spike shrugged. "Hey they said anything." "Absolutely." The unicorn nodded quickly. "The Church of Friendship is devoted to whatever you may need." Twilight's face suddenly drained of all emotion, leaving a blank stare. Her jaw worked up and down, but absolutely no sound came out. After a moment, Twilight let out a low groan. "Church of Friendship." She repeated emptily. "Yes your majesty." An orange pegasus said. "We have long followed your teachings on friendship, since when you ascended. Now that you have become a goddess, it was only right to-" "Goddess?" Twilight sputtered. "No! I'm just a regular alicorn!" She cringed a bit. "Uh, I'm just a regular alicorn as in I am of the non-goddess alicorns." She rubbed the back of her neck. "Uh, actually Celestia and Luna have asked ponies many many times to stop worshiping them so I don't really think any of the alicorns are goddesses." Silence reigned over the room for a long moment, and Twilight heard a few ponies coughing awkwardly. The gray unicorn looked up at Twilight with tears in his eyes. Twilight sat down, looking concerned. "Oh, gosh, I'm sorry if I was harsh. Was I harsh? I didn't mean to be." Twilight tried to assure them. "Such humbleness and grace!" The gray unicorn whispered, a single tear falling down his cheek. "Truly one so pure and mighty could only be a goddess!" "But she just said she's not a goddess!" Spike exclaimed. "She is testing our faith!" A pony yelled, and everyone else took up the call. "Surely it is a test from the Lady of Knowledge! Have no fear, we shall not be shaken in our faith now that we have seen your glory with our own eyes!" The orange pegasus cried. Twilight breathed slowly, putting her hoof to her chest and extending it as she breathed out. Every pony in the room immediately imitated the motion. Twilight screamed in frustration, holding tighter to Spike as she kicked the window open and fled outside. The ponies left inside the room stared on in awe. "The anger of the goddess is a righteous sign," the unicorn began gravely, "come my brothers and sisters, we shall act with the force of our Lady's glorious wrath!" They all cheered and galloped away. The two guards on the floor shared a look. "Hey do you think that was a bit ominous?" One asked. "Nah." The other said. Non puto, igitur, ego sum nobiliNon puto, igitur, ego sum nobili Twilight landed in the garden, panting heavily. She leaned against a seapony statue and wiped her forehead, Spike rolling out of her grasp and lying on his back in the grass. "And I didn't even get my gems." Spike sighed. Twilight shot him a glare. "Hey, I was just trying to get something good out of this mess." Spike defended. "How practical a goal, little dragon." Twilight whirled around, but couldn't see anypony near. Suddenly, the statue she was leaning on smirked and coiled on itself, its red and yellow eyes glinting. "Discord." Twilight stood between him and Spike. "What do you want?" "Me?" Discord asked, his tone deeply hurt and a stone hoof held over his heart. "Twilight, dear, you wound me." The seapony statue somehow snapped a hoof, and Discord lounged over the plinth in his "normal" form. "Why, I was just going to offer a way to get something good out of your situation!" Twilight frowned. "What do you mean?" She looked down to see herself dressed in flowing white cloth with a familiar face-shaped scepter in her hooves. She glared at Discord in irritation, looking up to see him similarly dressed and wearing a truly ridiculous amount of laurels. "I mean that I'll show you a thing or two about handling this goddess business." Discord said with a wink. "I've had plenty of experience being worshiped before." "I think I'll pass." Twilight said suspiciously, hoisting Spike onto her back and stepping out of the robes as she walked away. "Thanks for the offer though." Discord shrugged, leaning back and twidling his thumbs. "If you're sure." Twilight walked a few more paces. She looked back at Discord, who was whistling calmly and plucking a hedge's leaves that turned into meowing frogs as they fell. She stopped, sighing deeply. "What exactly would you show me?" She asked carefully. Discord was immediately at her side, his form a yellow-eyed replica of Twilight. "Oh, just the basics." Discord said boredly, flipping through a book that exploded upon being closed. "How to make the mortals do what you say, what type of marble works best for monuments in your honor, how to distill copious amounts of alcohol." He waved a hoof. "The list goes on and on." "Why would I need alc- You know what, not gonna ask." Twilight interrupted herself. "I just want to know how to get them to leave me alone!" Discord scoffed. "Simple!" He chuckled, grabbing his hooves and rolling himself into a floating list. "First, you just have to..." He paused. Discord turned back into his usual form, sitting with a puzzled look back on the plinth. "How to make them... Leave..." After a moment, Discord just raised an eyebrow at Twilight. "You want these ponies to stop giving you constant loving attention and monuments in your honor?" "Please." Twilight said. Discord gave Twilight an unreadable look. He thought for another moment in silence. Eventually, a slightly forced grin spread across his face. "Why, I'm sure Celestia can advise you there." Discord said stiffly. "She's got an exceptional talent for being boring. Maybe she can give one of her long-winded speeches that will make everypony be too asleep to bother you with their undying love." Twilight stared at Discord. "Discord, what's wrong?" She asked. Discord looked so shocked that his mane fizzed with electricity that shot between his horns. "Wrong? With me?" Discord laughed. "No, no, no, I'm doing better than I've ever been! Why I was just on my way to tea with my friends." Discord looked away towards Ponyville. "With my friend," he amended quietly. Discord gave Twilight a quick snaggle-toothed grin. "I'll go ahead and give you a second's head start." Twilight didn't even have time to react before Discord snapped, a purple flare shooting up into the sky and forming an arrow down at Twilight. Discord was gone in a blink, his laughter echoing around the garden. "Oh dear." Twilight gasped. The sudden sound of thundering hooves grew louder and louder by the second. Spike held on tight to Twilight's back as she flew towards Celestia's court as fast as she could. Twilight galloped to the doors to Celestia's court, panting heavily. Spike looked at the doors in growing apprehension. "Uh, Twilight? Aren't there gonna be ponies in there too?" Spike asked. "Doesn't matter." Twilight wheezed. "Need to get Celestia's help. Can't be worse than out here." Twilight burst through the door, skidding to a halt and slamming the doors behind her. She panted and wheezed for a moment, leaning against the door heavily as she chuckled a bit in relief. "Oh thank goodness I made it." Twilight breathed, turning around. "Celestia, I-" Twilight came face to face with a space packed to the brim with nobles. Celestia slowly cringed from the other end of the hall. Everything was deathly still. "Lady Twilight!" A mare close to Twilight exclaimed. "I must deeply congratulate you on your-" The mare's voice was lost immediately in a sea of voices all trying to give congratulations and adoration louder than everyone else. Nobles pushed and shoved to get closer to Twilight in a growing wall of ponies and noise. Twilight gaped at them, shrinking back as Spike clung to her back even tighter. The moments before the wave of nobles crashed into Twilight stretched on for an eternity. Twilight felt her heart pounding in her ears and throbbing in her chest, her eyes widening in fear. However, she also felt Spike clutching tightly to her mane, his eyes shut tight as he braced himself. Twilight felt a sudden determined calm fill her. No, she wasn't going to fall here to this absurd tidal wave of fancily dressed well-to-dos. She felt her wings spread as time seemed to speed back up to normal, the nobles falling over her and crashing against the door. Celestia looked on with a gasp of horror, her horn lighting up. Before she could even formulate her spell, Twilight burst from the rolling tide of aristocrats, a purple shield surrounding her. She shot up to the ceiling, flying in a swift arc across the court with streams of purple magic trailing behind her. Every pony in the hall stopped their clamoring and gazed upwards as Twilight blitzed like a shooting star towards Celestia. Twilight nabbed Celestia in her magic grip as she shot past, and the two alicorns slammed through the back doors with a crash. The doors flew shut again with a resounding crash, leaving the hall in silence. "So is day court over?" A stallion asked. The guard by Celestia's throne finally snapped awake, looking blearily around. Seeing the eyes of an entire hall upon him, he gulped. "Uh. Yeeeessss?" "This is getting slightly out of hand." Celestia commented thinly as she and Twilight made their way across the castle to Luna's wing. Through the vaulted windows the two alicorns could see carpenter and mason ponies cutting and smoothing what looked like Twilight and her friends standing heroically on a cliff. "Slightly?" Twilight asked, observing another half formed statue of all of the Elements of Harmony that looked suspiciously like a memorial. Celestia gave Twilight a tired and embarrassed grin. "Our ponies tend to get a bit overemotional about things like this." "A bit." Twilight droned, watching somepony sanding an incredibly stylized sculpture of Twilight and Spike, who was significantly taller and wearing some kind of armor. Spike looked on in awe, leaning back to try to keep it in his view as Twilight kept walking. Celestia shook her head. "Alright, a lot. Don't worry though Twilight, with Luna's help we can still solve this peacefully and rationally." Celestia pushed open the door to Luna's wing and was greeted with the sight of Luna's guard locked in fierce combat with robed ponies wearing mismatched purple armor. "May the heretics face our Lady's justice!" One of the robed ponies cried, knocking a guard out of the air with a spell. "We cannot lose! We fight for the one true Goddess!" Another screamed out, kicking a guard across the face. Twilight stared emptily at the commotion for a few moments. When she looked up at Celestia, she saw a look of absolute discomposure on the sun princess' face. "What the shit." Celestia blankly said, her voice having suddenly lost every ounce of its usual regal and caring tone. Twilight looked on in surprise as Celestia lit up her horn, grumbling under her breath. Everything in the hall stopped in its tracks, surrounded by a yellow glow. Celestia stormed to the other side of the hall, still muttering as she went. She looked back at Twilight with an irritated look. "Well don't just stand there." She snapped. Twilight snapped into action, galloping to catch up with Celestia. Spike poked a guard carefully as they passed, withdrawing his paw quickly with a look of awe. When they got to the other side of the swarm of fighting ponies, Celestia's spell dropped. Everypony in the hall crumpled to the floor, groaning and disoriented. Celestia picked up her pace into a trot, eyeing Luna's chamber doors with a look bordering on desperation. Twilight followed as quickly as she could as shouts from the robed ponies started to reach her ears again. "Wait! Lady Twilight!" One called, "we have read the signs you have given and have acted in the name of your glory! We shall claim this heathen castle in the name of friendship, knowledge, and kindness, even if we have to wade through a thousand battalions!" Celestia turned slightly to look back at them as she reached the door. "Do you hear yourself when you speak?" She asked sharply, pulling Twilight into the room and closing the door before the robed ponies could reach them. Luna watched Celestia pace up and down by the window, her mane ethereal whipping around her and muttered curses filtering from her side of the room. Luna turned to Twilight who was breathing raggedly, her teeth grit as she covered her ears to block out the calls of devotion and righteous anger that filtered through the locked door. Spike patted her on the back awkwardly, attempting to give some encouragement. "Okay, this needs to stop and it needs to stop now." Celestia said angrily, stopping and looking out the window at the crowds below. "This is even more ridiculous than when Cadence asce..." Celestia squinted. "Are they burning sacrifices on the lawn? Ohoho, no they did not just burn my favorite petunias!" Luna looked around, assessing the situation with a slowly growing and confident smile. "Have no fear!" Luna declared. "We have a plan!" Author's Note This chapter's title is in terribly written latin if you want to plug it in to google translate. It doesn't really have all that much to do with the chapter as a whole, I just thought it was hilarious. Apparently Dishonesty is the Best Policy"No." Celestia stated. "Why not? It would surely succeed!" Luna protested. Celestia rubbed her temples. "Luna, we are not lying to our subjects on this level. Besides, it would only delay our problem to a later date, not solve it." "I'm fine with that." Twilight interjected, her voice muffled from being curled into a ball and under a rug. "We can't just say you're suddenly not immortal anymore!" Celestia pointed out in exasperation. "Nopony will believe it unless they have some sort of proof." "Well I mean we could cut Twilight in half again and say she's dead for real this time." Spike suggested. Upon seeing the blank looks he was receiving from two princesses and a rug, he shrugged. "It would stop ponies thinking Twilight's immortal." "I think that would create a few minor issues." Celestia said dryly. Spike looked thoughtful, then nodded deeply. "Sister, this may be the only way to grant dear Twilight peace." Luna pleaded. "Our subjects do not know that there is no such spell to remove immortality! It was by the completion of a spell that she ascended in the first place, after all. We could simply claim to have made modifications to that spell." "Luna that's not how spells work and you know it." Celestia said tiredly. Luna huffed. "Well, does anypony know what the actual intended effects of Starswirl's spell was?" Celestia raised an eyebrow. "I suppose not." "And does anypony know what the magic of alicorns can and can not achieve?" "... I suppose not." Luna smiled. "Then it should work perfectly!" Celestia looked between Luna smiling grandly, the rug breathing heavily, and Spike slowly nabbing the smaller jewels off of her garments. "You know what? Fine." Celestia sighed. "I'll tell our staff to inform the public that we will be making an important address this evening. It's not like we can make this situation any worse." "Citizens of Canterlot, and indeed, citizens of our nation! Hear us now!" Luna boomed out, her Royal Canterlot Voice echoing down from the balcony she stood on and silencing the ocean of ponies below. "We have brought thee here to clear up some... Intense concerns that hath been shown!" Celestia stepped up as well. "My little ponies," she called, "Princess Twilight has been moved by your gifts, and has devised a spell of unprecedented effect." Celestia gestured grandly as Twilight walked up in between her and Luna. "She has discovered how to give up her immortality!" The gasps that rang from the crowd were silenced by a wave of Celestia's hoof. Twilight leaned out over the railings to stare wearily down at the throng. "Yeah. I was so, so moved." She deadpanned. "So deeply moved by your mortal concern that I, uh, decided to walk among you again. Yeah." The ponies erupted into cheering and applause. "We love you too Princess Twilight!" Many voices called. "Whatever let's do this." Twilight grumbled, standing between Celestia and Luna. The two older alicorns pointed their horns at Twilight, who was slowly surrounded by a growing orb of yellow and blue light. The sphere lifted up with Twilight inside, flashing with radiant purple stars before exploding into streams of magic dust that fell over the crowd as they dissipated. The crowd looked up to the balcony in anticipation. Twilight pulled her front legs up on the railing and dragged herself into view. "There! Okay?! I can die again!" Twilight roared out to the crowd. Immediately, cheers of joy and cries of excitement rang out all around, except for from a small group of robed ponies who wept and held eachother. The crowd dispersed, leaving Twilight, Celestia, and Luna alone. Twilight breathed heavily, her nostrils flaring as she tried to calm herself down. After a few minutes, she finally gave out a long breath of relief. Luna and Celestia both looked on in confusion as Twilight suddenly giggled. Her giggles grew in volume, until she was on her stomach and crying with laughter. Celestia stared at Luna as Luna began to crack up too, joining Twilight in her hearty laugh. Celestia stood in stoic silence as the other two alicorns slowly regained their composure, wiping away tears of mirth. "You've both lost your minds." Celestia sighed. "The trick worked! Now I can finally get some peace and quiet with everyone thinking I'm not immortal anymore!" Twilight exclaimed, letting out a deep and content sigh. There was a clattering sound at the doorway, and all three princesses whirled around to see a young reporter standing halfway in the door with a wide eyed and slack jawed expression. He hastily picked his recorder up from the floor, bolting as fast as his hooves could carry him. Twilight was up and racing after him in a blur, her cry of rage and desperation echoing down the hall. Celestia and Luna looked blankly on for a long while. "I'm just going to sleep." Celestia muttered. Author's Note So, first story in two years! I think it shows a bit, but in any case this was fun to write. Most people probably saw this particular interpretation of the prompt coming after looking at the wording, but hopefully there's not too many other stories that have the same idea. Anyways thanks for reading and all that, please leave me a comment telling me what you thought and maybe a like if you're feeling generous today!
Getting Only Half of the Story"In half?" Twilight and Spike both flinched at the concern and incredulity in Celestia's voice. Twilight scuffed a hoof against the marble floor before Celestia's throne, looking at Spike out of the corner of her eye. Spike raised his paws, stepping back a bit and shaking his head. Twilight bit her lip, not quite meeting Celestia's gaze. "Yes. Uh, in half." Twilight squirmed in the silence that followed. "Cleanly bifurcated," she added a bit softer, hoping that Celestia would say something, or at least move a bit. Neither of those things happened, so she continued with a small cough, "thoroughly trunca-" She cut herself off with an eyebrow raised. "Princess, are you okay?" Celestia did not immediately respond, for she was performing the Royal Double Facehoof, a gesture of such resigned frustration that every guard in the room suddenly sat down in emphatically felt weariness. Twilight took a tentative step closer to Celestia. "Uh, Princess?" "Twilight Sparkle," Celestia spoke suddenly, her tone endlessly patient, "you are the only pony I have ever known who would ask me if I am well immediately after informing me that you have been cleaved in twain." Twilight didn't quite have anything to respond to that. She shared a nervous look with Spike and instinctively felt her torso. There wasn't even a scar or a raised mark where the slice had been made. "Well," Twilight ventured, "I got better." "Indeed." Celestia responded dryly, before quickly regaining her regal and caring tone with a small cough. "And how exactly did you..." Celestia's face barely changed, but Twilight's years of studying with the princess let her know that she was struggling to put the situation into a coherent form. "How did you pull yourself together?" Spike spoke up nervously. "Uh, I saw it happen. She kinda just healed together on her own." His nose wrinkled in disgust. "It was actually really disturbing. There was a lot of these crunching and squelching noises, and I think Fluttershy passed out." Celestia blinked. "Right," she just barely managed to retain a neutral tone, "unconsciousness aside, are your friends who were with you okay?" Twilight nodded. "They're a bit banged up, but fine." Celestia nodded in return. "Then it seems our first order of business will be some explanations." She rose from her throne, making her way to the back door as her guards followed a bit behind her. "Please, follow me." Celestia called back to Twilight. Spike hopped on Twilight's back and the two followed Celestia up to Luna's tower, where she graciously dismissed both her and Luna's guards. She gave Twilight a thin smile. "I shall only be a moment." Celestia assured, ducking into the room. Twilight leaned close to the door, but she couldn't hear anything. She frowned. Of course there'd be silencing spells on the princess' chambers. She leaned back in disappointment, but Spike scrutinized the door closer. "Aren't there any spells that'll let us hear what they're saying?" Spike asked. Twilight rubbed her foreleg nervously. "Well, yeah, there are. But no matter how horribly curious we are, wouldn't that be a rude and unfriendly thing to do?" She pointed out. Spike nodded, stroking his chin and sitting with his feet almost touching the door as he looked it over. Twilight sat patiently, calmly, and most of all, politely. For five seconds. As soon as the spell was cast, Twilight and Spike could hear Celestia just as she finished saying something. They both leaned closer to the door, straining to hear. "It is indeed quite noble of Fluttershy to have attempted to calm the beast," Luna said, "but surely a creature like that could not be reasoned with. How is it that she escaped injury?" "Apparently, Twilight pushed her out of the way just in time." Luna gasped slightly. "How did dear Twilight avoid injury then?" "Well," Celestia said, her tone betraying no emotion, "according to what she told me, she was quite simply cut in half." The silence in the room was deafening. Twilight sat for a moment, and tapped her horn. Had the spell cut out? "In half." Luna finally spoke. "Yes." Celestia responded. "Hemisected." "Correct." "Divaricated." "Indeed." "Furc-" "Okay I am not in the mood to deal with this." Celestia interrupted. There was another pause, followed by Luna chuckling slowly. "Ah. Dear sister, centuries may separate us, but your penchant for pranking remains unchanged." Luna laughed. Her laughter awkwardly faded away. Silence once again returned, settling over the two eavesdroppers like a blanket made of anvils, but not preventing them from leaning further towards the door. "What?!" Luna screeched. "I know!" Celestia shouted in return. "She just..." Luna made a very undignified squelching noise. "Indeed! But she got better!" "Better?!" Luna's tone held nothing but confusion. "Better! She's right outside the door!" "Sister, our staff just mopped these floors!" "Alright, that is not at all what I meant." Celestia said, her tone disgusted. "Wow. No. I did not drag my student's physical halves all the way up the stairs. She's very well and not currently in two pieces." A long series of confused noises and half formed exclamations tumbled out of Luna's mouth, ending in an incredibly deep breath. Luna breathed deeply and rhythmically for a moment, Celestia waiting in silence all the while. "So then," Luna eventually managed, "it's alright, the incident is contained entirely to the Element Bearers who were present at the time, nopony else probably observed their battle deep in the Everfree, and we can contain these unexpected effects from public knowledge." Luna breathed deeply one last time, sounding much more calm. "Pray tell, who else aside from Fluttershy and Spike were present?" "Rainbow Dash and Rarity." Celestia blankly responded. Silence once again fell over Twilight and Spike while they leaned even closer to the door. "We are doomed." Luna deadpanned. "Undoubtedly." At this point physics remembered that it shouldn't be possible for an alicorn and a dragon to be leaning at a seventy degree angle against a door without pushing it open, and Twilight and Spike both tumbled to the floor at Celestia's hooves. Spike groaned dizzily, and Twilight attempted an innocent smile. "Uh," Twilight began with a small cough, "so you see, we were... well we weren't quite... it wasn't really-" "You were eavesdropping." Celestia stated. "Yeah we were eavesdropping." Twilight said defeatedly. "So what was that about being doomed?" "Twilight, as it would happen, immortality brings with it some rather peculiar consequences." Luna explained. "Some such consequences lie outside of the self, and instead reside in the hearts and minds of those who trust in immortals such as us. While we may remain like stone pillars of timeless power and security, those around us rise and fall as if they were pillars of sand moved by the winds of time. When one rises from mortality into a higher state of being like you have, and the ponies at large discover it, the effect on the national morale is astonishing in its weight." Twilight and Spike both stared at each other, then back at Luna. Both of their heads bobbed up and down in slow nods. "If everyone knows you're immortal now, you'll be paradoxically hounded by ponies trying to alleviate your suffering." Celestia translated blithely. "Oh." Twilight kept nodding for a second, the movement slowly morphing into confusion. "Wait, my suffering?" "We would be wise to explain this to you at a later time, after the crisis of which we speak has been averted." Luna said gravely. "For now, it is imperative that we find Rainbow Dash and Rarity before they can speak of your immortality to anypony, if such an outcome can still be avoided." Twilight waved a hoof and smiled. "Oh, princess, have a bit of faith! I'm sure they haven't spoken a word about it." Rarity burst into the spa so quickly that the doors both slammed into the opposite wall. She took a deep breath, and tilted her head back in a yell. "OH DO I EVER HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU, DARLINGS!" Twilight laughed quietly to herself, stopping when she realized it sounded a whole lot more defeated than she had meant it to. "Yeah okay all of Ponyville probably knows by now." Twilight sighed. "Probably a lot of Canterlot too." Spike added. Twilight shot him a withering look, to which he shrugged in response. "What? I'm just saying what we're all thinking." Celestia frowned. "We must hope that the news is not that widespread yet. For now, I believe we may be able to contain the situation if we act before the newspapers can get ahold of the story." With that, the three princesses and one dragon set off. Author's Note Thanks for reading!
Start Believing in Miracles"Ponyfeathers," Celestia swore, staring down the newsstand on the main road and ignoring the slightly fearful looks the owner was giving her, "it seems the news remains the fastest force we know." Twilight grabbed a paper and frowned. Every paper featured some variation of the headline Twilight Sparkle Faces Inspiring Struggle With Immortality, more information on page c3. "Inspiring struggle with immortality?" She read, bewildered. "I'm not struggling with it, I only just discovered it this morning!" Twilight looked up at Celestia and Luna, who were in the middle of sharing an unreadable look. "Twilight," Celestia began slowly, "Equestria is a great nation, and its ponies are prosperous. We have an overabundance of food, magic, and vaguely shaped modern art. This is in large part because of how we stick together as a whole. Our order and our consistency are what we are known for." Celestia sighed lightly, her head lowering a bit. "Unfortunately, that means big changes can cause mass reactions like this." Luna put a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Our little ponies will attempt to understand your immortality by empathizing with how they think it will affect you. Everypony has their own way of going about it, and now that your immortality is so widespread, everypony will act soon to curry your favor or encourage you. Truly, most will believe their work noble and a great aid to you." Twilight's ears folded back slowly. "Everypony is going to try to talk to me?" Celestia nodded. "Talk to you, give you gifts, recite you poems, and all at once probably." She patted Twilight's back. "And they'll continue with commendable determination, most likely for many days." Celestia turned back towards the castle. "We should probably leave now and get you someplace in the castle with a lot of guards so you don't get cornered by nobles. You are welcome to stay in the castle for as long as you wish, and please do not hesitate to contact Luna or I if you find yourself stuck." Celestia stepped forwards, and suddenly noticed Twilight's lack of response. "Twilight?" Twilight was as stiff as a board, her eyes impossibly wide and her mane slowly standing up in random places. Spike looked at her in concern, tentatively waving a paw before her eyes. After a moment, he poked her in the side. She didn't even twitch. Spike sighed. "I'll go get the wheelbarrow." He muttered. Spike stood on the bedstand to get a better look out the window at the courtyard below. He let out a low whistle at the sight of the growing throng of ponies attempting to enter the castle. "Wow, looks like a lot of ponies are showing up to see you." He chuckled. "Hey, maybe you could hold a day court." Twilight responded by continuing to breathe rapidly into a paper bag. Spike jumped up on the bed she was curled up on, rolling his eyes. "Twilight, come on," Spike said, "it's not as bad as you're thinking. So a few ponies are coming to wish you a happy eternity." Spike looked back out the window. "Uh, so a fair bit of ponies are coming to wish you... So a lot of ponies are... A sea of ponies... Hey is that Discord?" Spike gulped, closing the window and pulling the curtains quickly. "Uh, nevermind. I think trying to encourage you just discouraged me." Suddenly, a loud crash came from the hall. Twilight and Spike both jumped in surprise, and threw themselves under the bedsheets in a meager attempt to hide. Just as they did, the door was flung open. A swarm of ponies all dressed in robes entered the room, circling around the bed. Twilight looked into the hall with a gasp to see the guards had been tied up and were lying on their backs while looking slightly upset. She pulled Spike close to her protectively, and threw off the sheets. "Stay back, all of you!" Twilight yelled with wings flared, lighting her horn and levitating a shield of books in front of her. After a moment of hearing nothing, she peaked over her book palisade. Every single one of the robed ponies was bowing down. Twilight stared blankly at them, folding her wings back and shifting uncomfortably as she lowered her books. "Uh. C-can you stop that?" Twilight asked nervously. Immediately every single pony shot to their hooves. "Of course, your majesty." A taller grey unicorn said earnestly. "Anything you command." Twilight frowned deeply. Spike looked out from Twilight's close hold on him. "Hey can you command to have a tray of gems?" He asked. Twilight shot him an incredulous look, to which Spike shrugged. "Hey they said anything." "Absolutely." The unicorn nodded quickly. "The Church of Friendship is devoted to whatever you may need." Twilight's face suddenly drained of all emotion, leaving a blank stare. Her jaw worked up and down, but absolutely no sound came out. After a moment, Twilight let out a low groan. "Church of Friendship." She repeated emptily. "Yes your majesty." An orange pegasus said. "We have long followed your teachings on friendship, since when you ascended. Now that you have become a goddess, it was only right to-" "Goddess?" Twilight sputtered. "No! I'm just a regular alicorn!" She cringed a bit. "Uh, I'm just a regular alicorn as in I am of the non-goddess alicorns." She rubbed the back of her neck. "Uh, actually Celestia and Luna have asked ponies many many times to stop worshiping them so I don't really think any of the alicorns are goddesses." Silence reigned over the room for a long moment, and Twilight heard a few ponies coughing awkwardly. The gray unicorn looked up at Twilight with tears in his eyes. Twilight sat down, looking concerned. "Oh, gosh, I'm sorry if I was harsh. Was I harsh? I didn't mean to be." Twilight tried to assure them. "Such humbleness and grace!" The gray unicorn whispered, a single tear falling down his cheek. "Truly one so pure and mighty could only be a goddess!" "But she just said she's not a goddess!" Spike exclaimed. "She is testing our faith!" A pony yelled, and everyone else took up the call. "Surely it is a test from the Lady of Knowledge! Have no fear, we shall not be shaken in our faith now that we have seen your glory with our own eyes!" The orange pegasus cried. Twilight breathed slowly, putting her hoof to her chest and extending it as she breathed out. Every pony in the room immediately imitated the motion. Twilight screamed in frustration, holding tighter to Spike as she kicked the window open and fled outside. The ponies left inside the room stared on in awe. "The anger of the goddess is a righteous sign," the unicorn began gravely, "come my brothers and sisters, we shall act with the force of our Lady's glorious wrath!" They all cheered and galloped away. The two guards on the floor shared a look. "Hey do you think that was a bit ominous?" One asked. "Nah." The other said.
Non puto, igitur, ego sum nobiliNon puto, igitur, ego sum nobili Twilight landed in the garden, panting heavily. She leaned against a seapony statue and wiped her forehead, Spike rolling out of her grasp and lying on his back in the grass. "And I didn't even get my gems." Spike sighed. Twilight shot him a glare. "Hey, I was just trying to get something good out of this mess." Spike defended. "How practical a goal, little dragon." Twilight whirled around, but couldn't see anypony near. Suddenly, the statue she was leaning on smirked and coiled on itself, its red and yellow eyes glinting. "Discord." Twilight stood between him and Spike. "What do you want?" "Me?" Discord asked, his tone deeply hurt and a stone hoof held over his heart. "Twilight, dear, you wound me." The seapony statue somehow snapped a hoof, and Discord lounged over the plinth in his "normal" form. "Why, I was just going to offer a way to get something good out of your situation!" Twilight frowned. "What do you mean?" She looked down to see herself dressed in flowing white cloth with a familiar face-shaped scepter in her hooves. She glared at Discord in irritation, looking up to see him similarly dressed and wearing a truly ridiculous amount of laurels. "I mean that I'll show you a thing or two about handling this goddess business." Discord said with a wink. "I've had plenty of experience being worshiped before." "I think I'll pass." Twilight said suspiciously, hoisting Spike onto her back and stepping out of the robes as she walked away. "Thanks for the offer though." Discord shrugged, leaning back and twidling his thumbs. "If you're sure." Twilight walked a few more paces. She looked back at Discord, who was whistling calmly and plucking a hedge's leaves that turned into meowing frogs as they fell. She stopped, sighing deeply. "What exactly would you show me?" She asked carefully. Discord was immediately at her side, his form a yellow-eyed replica of Twilight. "Oh, just the basics." Discord said boredly, flipping through a book that exploded upon being closed. "How to make the mortals do what you say, what type of marble works best for monuments in your honor, how to distill copious amounts of alcohol." He waved a hoof. "The list goes on and on." "Why would I need alc- You know what, not gonna ask." Twilight interrupted herself. "I just want to know how to get them to leave me alone!" Discord scoffed. "Simple!" He chuckled, grabbing his hooves and rolling himself into a floating list. "First, you just have to..." He paused. Discord turned back into his usual form, sitting with a puzzled look back on the plinth. "How to make them... Leave..." After a moment, Discord just raised an eyebrow at Twilight. "You want these ponies to stop giving you constant loving attention and monuments in your honor?" "Please." Twilight said. Discord gave Twilight an unreadable look. He thought for another moment in silence. Eventually, a slightly forced grin spread across his face. "Why, I'm sure Celestia can advise you there." Discord said stiffly. "She's got an exceptional talent for being boring. Maybe she can give one of her long-winded speeches that will make everypony be too asleep to bother you with their undying love." Twilight stared at Discord. "Discord, what's wrong?" She asked. Discord looked so shocked that his mane fizzed with electricity that shot between his horns. "Wrong? With me?" Discord laughed. "No, no, no, I'm doing better than I've ever been! Why I was just on my way to tea with my friends." Discord looked away towards Ponyville. "With my friend," he amended quietly. Discord gave Twilight a quick snaggle-toothed grin. "I'll go ahead and give you a second's head start." Twilight didn't even have time to react before Discord snapped, a purple flare shooting up into the sky and forming an arrow down at Twilight. Discord was gone in a blink, his laughter echoing around the garden. "Oh dear." Twilight gasped. The sudden sound of thundering hooves grew louder and louder by the second. Spike held on tight to Twilight's back as she flew towards Celestia's court as fast as she could. Twilight galloped to the doors to Celestia's court, panting heavily. Spike looked at the doors in growing apprehension. "Uh, Twilight? Aren't there gonna be ponies in there too?" Spike asked. "Doesn't matter." Twilight wheezed. "Need to get Celestia's help. Can't be worse than out here." Twilight burst through the door, skidding to a halt and slamming the doors behind her. She panted and wheezed for a moment, leaning against the door heavily as she chuckled a bit in relief. "Oh thank goodness I made it." Twilight breathed, turning around. "Celestia, I-" Twilight came face to face with a space packed to the brim with nobles. Celestia slowly cringed from the other end of the hall. Everything was deathly still. "Lady Twilight!" A mare close to Twilight exclaimed. "I must deeply congratulate you on your-" The mare's voice was lost immediately in a sea of voices all trying to give congratulations and adoration louder than everyone else. Nobles pushed and shoved to get closer to Twilight in a growing wall of ponies and noise. Twilight gaped at them, shrinking back as Spike clung to her back even tighter. The moments before the wave of nobles crashed into Twilight stretched on for an eternity. Twilight felt her heart pounding in her ears and throbbing in her chest, her eyes widening in fear. However, she also felt Spike clutching tightly to her mane, his eyes shut tight as he braced himself. Twilight felt a sudden determined calm fill her. No, she wasn't going to fall here to this absurd tidal wave of fancily dressed well-to-dos. She felt her wings spread as time seemed to speed back up to normal, the nobles falling over her and crashing against the door. Celestia looked on with a gasp of horror, her horn lighting up. Before she could even formulate her spell, Twilight burst from the rolling tide of aristocrats, a purple shield surrounding her. She shot up to the ceiling, flying in a swift arc across the court with streams of purple magic trailing behind her. Every pony in the hall stopped their clamoring and gazed upwards as Twilight blitzed like a shooting star towards Celestia. Twilight nabbed Celestia in her magic grip as she shot past, and the two alicorns slammed through the back doors with a crash. The doors flew shut again with a resounding crash, leaving the hall in silence. "So is day court over?" A stallion asked. The guard by Celestia's throne finally snapped awake, looking blearily around. Seeing the eyes of an entire hall upon him, he gulped. "Uh. Yeeeessss?" "This is getting slightly out of hand." Celestia commented thinly as she and Twilight made their way across the castle to Luna's wing. Through the vaulted windows the two alicorns could see carpenter and mason ponies cutting and smoothing what looked like Twilight and her friends standing heroically on a cliff. "Slightly?" Twilight asked, observing another half formed statue of all of the Elements of Harmony that looked suspiciously like a memorial. Celestia gave Twilight a tired and embarrassed grin. "Our ponies tend to get a bit overemotional about things like this." "A bit." Twilight droned, watching somepony sanding an incredibly stylized sculpture of Twilight and Spike, who was significantly taller and wearing some kind of armor. Spike looked on in awe, leaning back to try to keep it in his view as Twilight kept walking. Celestia shook her head. "Alright, a lot. Don't worry though Twilight, with Luna's help we can still solve this peacefully and rationally." Celestia pushed open the door to Luna's wing and was greeted with the sight of Luna's guard locked in fierce combat with robed ponies wearing mismatched purple armor. "May the heretics face our Lady's justice!" One of the robed ponies cried, knocking a guard out of the air with a spell. "We cannot lose! We fight for the one true Goddess!" Another screamed out, kicking a guard across the face. Twilight stared emptily at the commotion for a few moments. When she looked up at Celestia, she saw a look of absolute discomposure on the sun princess' face. "What the shit." Celestia blankly said, her voice having suddenly lost every ounce of its usual regal and caring tone. Twilight looked on in surprise as Celestia lit up her horn, grumbling under her breath. Everything in the hall stopped in its tracks, surrounded by a yellow glow. Celestia stormed to the other side of the hall, still muttering as she went. She looked back at Twilight with an irritated look. "Well don't just stand there." She snapped. Twilight snapped into action, galloping to catch up with Celestia. Spike poked a guard carefully as they passed, withdrawing his paw quickly with a look of awe. When they got to the other side of the swarm of fighting ponies, Celestia's spell dropped. Everypony in the hall crumpled to the floor, groaning and disoriented. Celestia picked up her pace into a trot, eyeing Luna's chamber doors with a look bordering on desperation. Twilight followed as quickly as she could as shouts from the robed ponies started to reach her ears again. "Wait! Lady Twilight!" One called, "we have read the signs you have given and have acted in the name of your glory! We shall claim this heathen castle in the name of friendship, knowledge, and kindness, even if we have to wade through a thousand battalions!" Celestia turned slightly to look back at them as she reached the door. "Do you hear yourself when you speak?" She asked sharply, pulling Twilight into the room and closing the door before the robed ponies could reach them. Luna watched Celestia pace up and down by the window, her mane ethereal whipping around her and muttered curses filtering from her side of the room. Luna turned to Twilight who was breathing raggedly, her teeth grit as she covered her ears to block out the calls of devotion and righteous anger that filtered through the locked door. Spike patted her on the back awkwardly, attempting to give some encouragement. "Okay, this needs to stop and it needs to stop now." Celestia said angrily, stopping and looking out the window at the crowds below. "This is even more ridiculous than when Cadence asce..." Celestia squinted. "Are they burning sacrifices on the lawn? Ohoho, no they did not just burn my favorite petunias!" Luna looked around, assessing the situation with a slowly growing and confident smile. "Have no fear!" Luna declared. "We have a plan!" Author's Note This chapter's title is in terribly written latin if you want to plug it in to google translate. It doesn't really have all that much to do with the chapter as a whole, I just thought it was hilarious.
Apparently Dishonesty is the Best Policy"No." Celestia stated. "Why not? It would surely succeed!" Luna protested. Celestia rubbed her temples. "Luna, we are not lying to our subjects on this level. Besides, it would only delay our problem to a later date, not solve it." "I'm fine with that." Twilight interjected, her voice muffled from being curled into a ball and under a rug. "We can't just say you're suddenly not immortal anymore!" Celestia pointed out in exasperation. "Nopony will believe it unless they have some sort of proof." "Well I mean we could cut Twilight in half again and say she's dead for real this time." Spike suggested. Upon seeing the blank looks he was receiving from two princesses and a rug, he shrugged. "It would stop ponies thinking Twilight's immortal." "I think that would create a few minor issues." Celestia said dryly. Spike looked thoughtful, then nodded deeply. "Sister, this may be the only way to grant dear Twilight peace." Luna pleaded. "Our subjects do not know that there is no such spell to remove immortality! It was by the completion of a spell that she ascended in the first place, after all. We could simply claim to have made modifications to that spell." "Luna that's not how spells work and you know it." Celestia said tiredly. Luna huffed. "Well, does anypony know what the actual intended effects of Starswirl's spell was?" Celestia raised an eyebrow. "I suppose not." "And does anypony know what the magic of alicorns can and can not achieve?" "... I suppose not." Luna smiled. "Then it should work perfectly!" Celestia looked between Luna smiling grandly, the rug breathing heavily, and Spike slowly nabbing the smaller jewels off of her garments. "You know what? Fine." Celestia sighed. "I'll tell our staff to inform the public that we will be making an important address this evening. It's not like we can make this situation any worse." "Citizens of Canterlot, and indeed, citizens of our nation! Hear us now!" Luna boomed out, her Royal Canterlot Voice echoing down from the balcony she stood on and silencing the ocean of ponies below. "We have brought thee here to clear up some... Intense concerns that hath been shown!" Celestia stepped up as well. "My little ponies," she called, "Princess Twilight has been moved by your gifts, and has devised a spell of unprecedented effect." Celestia gestured grandly as Twilight walked up in between her and Luna. "She has discovered how to give up her immortality!" The gasps that rang from the crowd were silenced by a wave of Celestia's hoof. Twilight leaned out over the railings to stare wearily down at the throng. "Yeah. I was so, so moved." She deadpanned. "So deeply moved by your mortal concern that I, uh, decided to walk among you again. Yeah." The ponies erupted into cheering and applause. "We love you too Princess Twilight!" Many voices called. "Whatever let's do this." Twilight grumbled, standing between Celestia and Luna. The two older alicorns pointed their horns at Twilight, who was slowly surrounded by a growing orb of yellow and blue light. The sphere lifted up with Twilight inside, flashing with radiant purple stars before exploding into streams of magic dust that fell over the crowd as they dissipated. The crowd looked up to the balcony in anticipation. Twilight pulled her front legs up on the railing and dragged herself into view. "There! Okay?! I can die again!" Twilight roared out to the crowd. Immediately, cheers of joy and cries of excitement rang out all around, except for from a small group of robed ponies who wept and held eachother. The crowd dispersed, leaving Twilight, Celestia, and Luna alone. Twilight breathed heavily, her nostrils flaring as she tried to calm herself down. After a few minutes, she finally gave out a long breath of relief. Luna and Celestia both looked on in confusion as Twilight suddenly giggled. Her giggles grew in volume, until she was on her stomach and crying with laughter. Celestia stared at Luna as Luna began to crack up too, joining Twilight in her hearty laugh. Celestia stood in stoic silence as the other two alicorns slowly regained their composure, wiping away tears of mirth. "You've both lost your minds." Celestia sighed. "The trick worked! Now I can finally get some peace and quiet with everyone thinking I'm not immortal anymore!" Twilight exclaimed, letting out a deep and content sigh. There was a clattering sound at the doorway, and all three princesses whirled around to see a young reporter standing halfway in the door with a wide eyed and slack jawed expression. He hastily picked his recorder up from the floor, bolting as fast as his hooves could carry him. Twilight was up and racing after him in a blur, her cry of rage and desperation echoing down the hall. Celestia and Luna looked blankly on for a long while. "I'm just going to sleep." Celestia muttered. Author's Note So, first story in two years! I think it shows a bit, but in any case this was fun to write. Most people probably saw this particular interpretation of the prompt coming after looking at the wording, but hopefully there's not too many other stories that have the same idea. Anyways thanks for reading and all that, please leave me a comment telling me what you thought and maybe a like if you're feeling generous today!
