You're...You're Serious?

by lavendernoodle

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Slice of Life, Human, Romance
Length: 839

Zephyr Breeze and Soarin' are in love with Rainbow Dash. They show up to her house to court her. On the same day.

Zephyr Breeze and Soarin' are in love with Rainbow Dash. They show up to her house to court her. On the same day.

Rainbow is a bit surprised.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-08-14 05:40:01 UTC

Whaaaaaaaat?

Soarin' felt great. He'd brushed his hair and done his morning exercises.

He flew over the hills, dreaming of his days spent with her when she first became a Wonderbolt. The way they flirted and he'd hardly noticed.

Some days Soarin' couldn't believe that he spent all those years with Spitfire.

What if she didn't feel the same way? You're the total package, he reminded himself.

Taking a deep breath, he reached for the doorbell.

Another hand did the same.

"Gah!" Soarin' jumped backwards. He looked to the other guy. "Sorry. I didn't see you."

"It's all good, brother." He was a tall guy with blond hair. He outstretched a hand. "Zephyr Breeze."

"Soarin' Skies." He shook Zephy's hand. "What brings you to this fine home this morning?" Soarin' asked, ringing the doorbell.

Zephyr blushed and rubbed his neck. "Uh...hehe, it's kinda embarrassing. The girl who lives here-"

He was cut short by the door opening.

Soarin' was more than shocked by what he saw standing there. It was Rainbow, but she looked quite different from the last time Soarin' saw her. He'd grown a couple inches, surprisingly, leaving her to peer up at him. Dash's long hair was twisted into a bun. Above all, she was huge! Her stomach poked right out of her tank top.

"Soarin'? Zephyr?" Rainbow rubbed her eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh, Rainbows...could we talk in private?" Zephyr asked.

Rainbow laughed and leaned on the doorway. "Ha, Zephyr, you're gonna have to come up with a better excuse than that to see me." She looked at Soarin'. "What about you?"

"I...would also like to talk in private."

Dash frowned. "Uh, okay. Come inside."

Soarin' sat on the couch, wringing his hands. Zephyr and Fluttershy were talking in the kitchen. What is she doing here so early? Soarin' asked himself.

Rainbow came in and handed him some coffee. "It's been a while, huh?"

Soarin' nodded. "If you don't mind me asking...what have you been up to?"

She sighed. "Well, it's been pretty tough. Fluttershy and I are looking for a new house. This one's nice and big but...too big. Too much fragile stuff. But uh...I'm doing well. Everything's coming along. How 'bout you?"

"Everything's good. Except I broke up with Spitfire yesterday."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you guys were a good match."

"It's alright."

Zephyr and Fluttershy came into the room. Fluttershy whispered something into Rainbow's ear. Rainbow looked up to Zephyr.

"Are you serious?"

Zephyr nodded. "What?" Soarin' asked.

Dash gave him an angry look. "We need to have a talk."

Dash sat in an armchair in her office. Soarin' and Zephyr squeezed into a tiny couch. Fluttershy stood next to Dash.

"Alright, you two." Dash pointed at Fluttershy. "First thing: we're married."

Soarin' didn't say anything. Niether did Zephyr, but he looked surprised. Fluttershy said quietly, "You said you couldn't make the wedding."

"Next thing: I'm pregnant. With her baby." Dash looked at Soarin'. "Why did you think I took a break from flying?"

"Uh, I don't know..." Soarin' gulped. "H-How are you..."

"Pregnant?"

Soarin' nodded.

"Twilight. She-er, she and Cadence-helped with the...creation."

"Um...I didn't think you were pregnant...since you didn't have a boyfriend," Zephyr blurted. "I just thought you were a bit...rounder."

A tall, skinny guy with fluffy brown hair kicked the door open. "Did I hear that somebody's pregnant?"

"Cheese Sandwhich?" Fluttershy asked. "How did you even get up here?"

"Balloons, duh."

Rainbow folded her arms against her chest. "So...that's why you both came? To go out with me?"

They nodded.

"Why'd you come in if you saw I was pregnant?"

They shrugged. Fluttershy and Rainbow laughed. "They think they could have changed your mind," Fluttershy said, giggling.

Soarin' felt his ears growing hot. Zephyr opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by the door slamming open again.

A guy with gray hair walked in. "Who's read for book..." He yelled, and then got quiet when he saw the scene unfolding in the room. "Club?"

"Quibble?" Dash asked.

"Uh...what's going on?"

"I could ask you the same thing. We don't do book club."

Quibble blushed. "Er...um...well, there's something else I wanted to talk about..."

Rainbow put her head in her hands. "Oh Celestia."

After an awkward amount of silence, Soarin' blurted, "I just wanted to remind you, Dash, that we've known each other the longest."

Zephyr laughed. "Soarin', I don't believe that you knew...I'm Fluttershy's little bro. Me and Rainbow, we go way back."

Rainbow and Fluttershy cringed. Quibble added, "But...Rainbow, I mean...we have so much in common. All the adventures we've been on... Well, the one adventure..."

Dash groaned. "I'm a LESBIAN YOU IDIOTS."

The guys frowned. Fluttershy piped in, "And she's married. I don't know...but I'd guess she's not leaving me anytime soon."

Dash nodded. She walked over to the door, and gestured for them to leave.

"If you change your mind..." Zephyr said, holding up his hand which was forming a phone, "Call me."

Rainbow Dash slammed the door shut.