Chrysalis Eats Some Waffles
Author's Note
After watching the final, biking around town, getting hit by a car, coming home, taking medicine, and watching this video, this story popped in my head...
...
Enjoy!
I ain't too late to the party, am I?
Made with love
Chrysalis stared intently at the list in front of her, which was nothing but a blank piece of parchment. She intended to have a list of things to do at this point, but it continued being blank for several hours. She couldn’t turn away from it and the quill in her magic grip refused to write. She tried coming up with something, one sentence, one word, maybe even a letter, but no. The page stayed blank.
Chrysalis eventually sighed in sadness and set the quill down, groaning and rubbing her temples. “Come on now, you can do this...It can’t be that hard to come up with another plan, you’ve done it before, you can do it again, and, unlike last time, you can succeed!” She raised the quill again and prepared to write out an ingenious plan to thwart all the ponies who dared tried to stand in her way.
“It has to be perfect, there can’t be any flaws! It needs to start with taking care of that accursed pink mare and her husband, then, I can move on to the princesses! They’ll be an easy target, then finally, I can go after...her.” Chrysalis snapped the quill the second she mentioned that mare. “Sparkle and her friends will be so easy to take, no other pony will stop me once I have all six of them, because there won’t be anyone else!”
At this point, Chrysalis stood up. “YES! I will take them all. I will bring every foe that has ever stood in my way here and take them out of the picture!” The queen took hold of the paper and quill with her magic and started writing, not noticing the still blank words. “All the elements will be in my hooves, the princesses will be out of the way, the lovely couple will be mine, and every other pony will bow down to me as I hold their only hope by their throats!” She looked back at the parchment. “And all their names and locations are...right...here...”
It took Chrysalis a moment to look over her work, which was absolutely nothing. She turned to the quill, now realizing it was broken and that the ink was nowhere on it. With a twitching eye followed by a deep throated growl, she slammed the parchment on the table, her head soon following. “Oh who am I kidding, I can’t take all of them. I’m just one queen, and all my subjects ever do is-”
“HI, QUEEN!”
Chrysalis slammed her hoof on the table and lit up her horn, pointing it at where the noise came from. “WHO DARES INT...err...upt me?” Her question was answered by a group of five changelings looking up at her, all of them smiling.
One of them waved. “Hey, queen, we wanted to know how the evil plan was coming along. It’s, uh, been a while.”
Chrysalis closed her eyes and sighed, not even wanting to know how her children got into her chambers. “Children, you're queen is much to busy to help in whatever it is you need."
“But we all wanted to bring you something to help you concentrate on taking over Equestria!” One said happily.
Chrysalis continued looking away. “You being here isn’t help-” The second she looked back, she saw five of her children on the verge of tears. With an annoyed sigh, she said, “Alright, what did you bring?”
The five bugs looked at each other and smiled, knowing this was the greatest idea the whole hive had come up with to help their queen feel better. “We made WAFFLES!”
The gears in Chrysalis’s brain tripped off track the second she heard those three words. “What?”
“Waffles!” One of them repeated, bringing up a large plate of them. “We got em for you!”
Chrysalis looked at said plate of waffles that was now laid on the table. “Wu-what?”
One child pulled themselves up on the table. “Come on, queen, you know what waffles are, right?”
Chrysalis was still trying to comprehend the fact that a stack of waffles was on her planning table. “I...I know what they are, but...w-what?”
“What?” Another changeling stood up. “A-Are they not good?”
“No, they’re...I mean, yes they, I…” Chrysalis face-hoof, not wanting to deal with this. “Listen, children, I...really appreciate this, but your queen is very busy right now, and the last thing she needs is little lings interrupting her.”
The small one’s frowned. “But...waffles.”
Knowing that it takes hours to get children out of her face when they want something, Chrysalis stood up and said, “I think it’s time I take a walk.” With that, she took the quill and paper in her magic grip and made her way out the door, the five changelings soon following with the plate on their backs.
“But queen, everyling in the hive helped make them.”
Chrysalis chuckled and started writing her list of ponies to take. “Like the whole hive could possibly-”
“How were they?”
Chrysalis yelped as a pair of changelings flew up to her, smiles plastered on their faces. “Wh-What?” Was all she could say in response.
“The waffles!” One of them asked. “They were pretty good, right?”
The other one nodded. “Yeah, it took me hours to help make the tenth one! I hope it was alright!”
Chrysalis backed up. “Y-you made-”
“She didn’t try them.”
Chrysalis and the two drones looked down at five sad changelings, most of them on the verge of tears. “I...I don’t think she likes them.”
Knowing this was going to get awkward, Chrysalis clarified. “I never said I don’t like them, I just said I don’t need them.”
“So, you don’t like them?” The bigger ling asked, receiving a deadpan glare from Chrysalis.
“Sometimes, I wonder what you’d all do without me.” Chrysalis walked past all of them and continued down the hall.
“Live the life of Riley?” The larger one answered, getting a smack in the head from his brother.
Chrysalis looked down at the parchment again, but another one of her subjects flew up to her. “Hey, queen, didja try the wa-”
“No, child, I didn’t.”
“Aw...It took me forever to get it right…”
The queen ignored this and continued walking, only to bump into more of her children. “How were the waffles, Queen?”
“Uh…” Chrysalis was starting to get concerned by this. “T-They were-”
“Did the waffles taste any good, my Queen?” Chrysalis turned around, seeing even more changelings were crowding around
“S-Subjects, what is the meaning of this!?”
“How were the last three waffles?” More bugs held their head high. “We saved the best for last!”
Chrysalis started gritting her teeth. “Children, I am not in the mood for this.”
Another changeling flew up to her. “Y-You tried the waffles, right?”
Chrysalis shoved more of her children out of the way, but more continued crowding in. “Children, I am not going to have waffles stop me from-”
“You didn’t try the waffles!?” More started filling the room. “Come on, Queen, please?”
“Subjects, waffles are the last thing I need right-”
Almost the entirety of the hive was in the main room at this point. “Please?”
“Changelings! Your queen doesn’t want-”
“Please?”
Chrysalis was starting to flash her eyes red. “Subjects, I order you to-”
“Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-”
“ENOUGH!”
All bugs stopped talking the second Chrysalis screamed and slammed her hooves on the cave floor. With one eye twitching, she took hold of the plate of waffles. “I will try them, already!” After finally regaining her composure, Chrysalis took hold of one of the waffles on the plate with her magic, her children widening their eyes in excitement.
Chrysalis looked at the waffle, seeing it was like any other ordinary one, slightly warm with no signs mold, it was not too hard, yet not too soft either. Chrysalis had to admit, she was impressed to see this. She looked back at her children, all of them waiting for the moment of truth. With a straight face, Chrysalis opened her mouth and bit down on the spongy food, a chorus of gasps went through the crowd as she started chewing. “Sooooo…” One changeling asked. “How is it?
Chrysalis couldn’t lie, they did taste pretty good. “Well, ‘er adequaht, I’ll ‘ive you hat.” She swallowed and asked the one question that was on her mind the entire time. “But...why?”
“Why what?” One changeling asked.
“Why make me these?” Chrysalis waited for an answer, but all her children gave her blank stares, followed by shrugging. The queen sighed. “I may never know the answer, it seems.”
One changeling raised a hoof in the air. “We just thought that, if you ate something, it’d help you plan out a...uh, plan.”
“A plan, huh…” Chrysalis looked at the waffle in front of her, having an idea. “Well, my subjects, I do have a plan, how about I explain it.” She held up the waffle. “Imagine this waffle as every pony that we have faced. Do you remember them?”
All bugs thought about this. “Uh...let's see, there’s that white pony who whines.”
“That orange one who talks weird,”
“That yellow one that’s always quiet,”
“The blue one who likes rainbows,”
“The pink one who doesn’t shut up, but she does look pretty,”
“Then there’s that other pink one we ponynapped,”
“Also her idiot husband!”
“Then there’s that black and blue alicorn.”
“And that scary white one.”
“And...uh…” At this point, the changelings were stumped, thinking they got all the ponies. As for Chrysalis, she knew who they were forgetting.
“And Twilight Sparkle.” She said, still holding up the waffle. “All those ponies represent this waffle, okay?” All of them nodded. “Now then, imagine my mouth being the cave that we’re in.”
“We live in your mouth?” One asked.
Chrysalis knew someone would say something stupid. “It’s a demonstration, child.” She took the waffle with both her hooves. “With this waffle, er, the ponies, I want you to do this with them.” She tossed the breakfast treat in the air and caught it with her fangs, chewing on the food
Some changelings understood, but the rough majority were still confused. “You want us to eat them?”
“But we’re not into that kind of stuff, queen...well, Jackson is, but he’s-”
“NOAH!” Chrysalis said, her mouth still full. “Ah wahnt uo tah beh eh ear!”
A chorus of, “What?” Echoed through the cave.
Chrysalis swallowed the battered treat and said, “I want you to bring them here! All of them! Everypony that was responsible for bringing our plan down, everypony that stood up to us, everypony that thought they could take us out!” Chrysalis took another waffle and smiled. “I want them all here, the elements, the couple, and the princesses, I want them trapped in this cave and wrapped in coccons so that we can take over Equestria! Is that understood, my loyal subjects?”
Every single changeling stood in attention and saluted. “Yes, Queen Chrysalis!”
“Glad you agree, because we’ll be preparing to...to…” Chrysalis took another bite of her waffle and swallowed, chuckling. “I have to say, children, these are quite delectable. What are these made of?”
“Waffles!”
Chrysalis laughed, feeling in a somewhat good mode now. “No, child, what are the ingredients?” She took another bite, trying to figure out what this flavor was.
“That one’s got peanuts and soap in them!”
“I made mine with a hint of garlic!”
“I put applesauce in mine!”
“Nothing adds taste like cooked carrots, right queen?”
“Mine’s got gravy in it!”
“I added some of our finest green slime into the mix to add texture.”
“And the rest is filled with love...and pepper!”
Chrysalis’s eyes went wide with every ingredient they said. She dropped the waffle on the floor and held her stomach, her face blank. “Uh...You okay, queen? You look kinda green, and not in the cool kind of way.” The queen looked at all of them, her stomach starting to churn and her body shaking, with one final breath before the inevitable, she screamed out:
“YOU IDEAAAAAAAAAAAAHAEPSHSALAAAWHAHSDFHPANCBNADJFJPFPPFHFHF!”
