Chapter One: Hugs, Death Threats, and Revelations
"Wowie..." Thorax whispered, jaw dropped.
The room was...'gorgeous' seemed too mundane a word. While composed of crystal like much of the palace, this room's floor was a sapphire blue streaked with a long spiraling stripe of pink quartz, the walls were a shade of sky blue, each wall inscribed with a beautiful mosaic depicting Crystal Ponies going about their daily life and breathtaking landscapes from the empire. A single beautiful rose crystal themed door opened to an outside balcony, letting the fading light in to reflect off the gems and floors, painting the room in an enchanting rosy glow.
A masterfully crafted desk, wardrobe, and vanity sat on one side of the room, each composed of incredibly expensive imported mahogany, while on the other side was the biggest and comfiest looking bed Thorax had ever seen, covered in a blue blanket embroidered with stylized slender stars and massive, fluffy pillows that made Thorax sleepy just looking at them. One book case stood next to the bed, filled with dozens of hardcover books with gold trim written in the old Equish Crystal Ponies as a whole still favored.
All told, the room's combined wealth, comfort, and sheer size dwarfed anything he had ever seen (barring that one time he had accidentally walked into Princess Euphoria's bed chambers...bad day).
"And it's all yours, Thorax," Cadence told him with a warm smile, gesturing inside.
Thorax blinked and looked back at her, wide eyed. "Really?"
"Of course. You're the first Changeling we've, well, ever encountered who wanted to be friends. So long as you stay in the empire, you will be welcome here," Cadence told him with a smile.
Cadence nearly fell over as he all but tackled her in an enveloping hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Thorax said, prompting Cadence to pat his back. Eventually, he realized what he was doing and shyly stepped back, wiping his eyes.
"Well, it's getting late and you've had a long day. You should get some rest," Cadence said with a motherly tone Celestia would be proud of and stepped back to the door..
The mere mention of rest hit Thorax with an incredible urge to yawn. After Spike's...song ( he made a note to ask if that's how ponies traditionally resolved conflict), he'd spent the entire day first talking with Princess Twilight, Shining Armor, and Princess Cadence before Spike took him on a proper tour of the city. Some ponies reacted with fear to him, but the sight of Spike reassured many more, and he'd ended up meeting more ponies than he could count, even some foals who he'd wowed with his ability to shift.
Although, for some reason that had attracted a strangely large number of mares who just wouldn't stop asking asking if he could mimic Prince Shining Armor. Even when he did, most just made a strange squeeing sound, a few did some weird batting motion with their long eyelashes, asked him what he was doing tomorrow or if he had a special "somepony", whatever that was. Oh, and one mare decided to risk choking by eating an entire banana in one bite while looking into his eyes.
Maybe all of that was a was a weird pony friendship thing? If so, why hadn't the stallions done anything similar? And why had everything tasted of lust for an hour afterward? He'd have to ask Spike about it.
Thorax yawned loudly, making Cadence chuckle while he flushed. "Well, if that's not my cue to leave, I don't know what is. Good night, Thorax," Cadence said with a gentle smile as she stepped out and closed the door behind her.
Thorax shuffled his hooves a bit, listening for any steps before locking his door. With a giddy grin, his legs tensed, and reenacted something he'd wanted to do ever since he was a little nymph and launched himself forward, landing face first into the bed. Undeterred by what would have hurt a pony, he proceeded to bounce around in circles for a solid minute, laughing before he abruptly collapsed onto the bed, letting out a massive contented sigh as he practically sank into the soft mattress.
Thorax yawned one last time, closed his eyes and let sleep take him.
Thorax woke up, and immediately noted three things. The sun had long since set and the moon had risen high in the sky, allowing pale moonlight to bathe his room in an ethereal glow. Secondly, he realized he had forgotten the delightful blankets and had robbed himself of an even greater experience. Third, he had to pee. Badly.
Changelings didn't need as much food or water as ponies and, after reaching adult hood, could survive on a tenth of the food the average pony would regularly consume if they had a good supply of love, barring severe injuries which generally made them ravenous. Furthermore, while food was not nearly as necessary to their existence, Changelings could and did enjoy taste, even if it would never be as satisfying as something like love or affection. That being said, Thorax had discovered the closest liquid equivalent to love in the form of the raspberry lemonade made by the royal Chef Sweet Lemon and had downed twelve cups in one sitting at the dinner held by Cadence and Shining Armor the previous night.
Momentarily, he panicked when he realized the room didn't have a bathroom, but soon recalled one down the hall. Without further ado, he did his best to break the sound barrier (and would have instantly been challenged to a race by Rainbow if she'd seen him right then and there) as he bolted from his room.
Five minutes later, he walked back into his room, now brightly lit courtesy of a few sun lamps. He yawned and closed the door behind him with a loud bang.
"Hello, Queen Chrysalis," he sleepily said. He walked by her, seated at the mahogany desk, a strange book held in her green aura.
"Hello, Thorax, " Chrysalis said, setting the book down that he now noticed had the cover of a rather menacing black unicorn, holding the chains of several sickly Crystal ponies.
He continued a few steps further, intent on the delightful embrace of his wonderful new bed before he whirled around at near sonic speeds with an audible snap and froze, staring at his queen.
"Ah, I was wondering when that would kick in. It is a rather late hour, I admit," Chrysalis casually commented, her horn flaring momentarily, causing the book to disappear in a flash of light.
Thorax's mouth moved, but only a tiny whine came out.
"Oh, not feeling talkative?" Chrysalis asked, tilting her head as she stepped closer. "No matter I suppose. Talking isn't really necessary for what comes next," she said with a wide, fang filled smile. Her horn ignited and he was pulled forward so fast that the wind was knocked out of him, preventing a scream or any really sound at all.
Chrysalis front hooves immediately closed around his neck firmly and he was drawn even further into her grip.
This was it. Months of wandering the wilderness, running away from scouts, finally making friends after so much failure, only to end strangled to death by his own queen.
Chrysalis drew him even closer to her, the sheer strength of her grip enough to make his chitin creak.
A horrible thought made his blood freeze. She wasn't going to strangle him. She was going to crush him, likely leave his battered, broke corpse as an evidence to all who would oppose her
Tears built up at the edge of his eyes as the end approached. "Please. No..." Thorax whispered futilely, almost inaudible as the hooves pulled his motionless form closer.
Chrysalis suddenly stopped, and the unbearable pressure on his chest and back lessened as she leaned back in...surprise? "Okay, quick question-did you grow to hate hugs in the past year?"
Thorax blinked and responded with an eloquent, "Wut?"
Chrysalis spun him around and telekinetically sat him on the bed as she stepped back a respectful distance."If you did, I completely understand-they're not for everyone. Honestly, while I personally love hugs now, it took me years to not send the closest ling through seven walls if they so much as touched me. It's kind of funny, actually. I developed a little phobia of them after my sister nearly ripped my throat out back in the day, so trust me when I say I can completely empathize," she said, pacing around the bed.
"Wut?"
Chrysalis didn't pay attention. Instead, she tilted her head, one ear raised and her eyes went distant for a moment. "One second," she said. She shifted effortlessly to look like Princess Cadence and opened the bedroom door and stepped out and into the hall.
Thorax numbly watched his door. He heard the briefest little gasp of surprise, followed by muffled chatter. A minute later, Chrysalis stepped back into the room, closed the door behind her and dispelled her disguise immediately, a tray of tea held in her brilliant green aura. She set the tray down on the bed next to him, and took a cup back into her aura and took a sip.
"Wut?"
"Oh, yeah that probably didn't make sense. You see, Pink Bitch likes to have a few cups of tea before bed, and I felt the urge to intercept the maid taking it to her," Chrysalis said, taking a sip. "Want some?" Chrysalis offered, floating a cup over to land beside him. "It's chamomile, and I've heard it's rather calming and great for a good night's rest, " Chrysalis said, sighing happily as she sipped her tea.
Slowly, Thorax looked at the extra tea cup and then back to Chrysalis, who had her eyes closed and a happy smile on her lips. Slowly, almost mechanically, he took the cup into his hooves and promptly dumped the scalding liquid over his head.
Chrysalis arched an eyebrow. Thorax stared blankly ahead, and blinked once, twice, and then three times before comprehension returned to his eyes, along with fresh panic before a single question, more of an observation in fact, cut through the maelstrom of confusion and fear that was his mind.
"W-w-wait, you're...not going to kill me?"
"Now why would I do that?" Chrysalis said with a smile.
"Uh, I stole resources from Haven's emergency stores, disobeyed your orders and left both you and the rest of my sisters in the dead of night without a word, and-"
"And none of that is worth executing one of my children. Certainly worth a good scolding and maybe a spanking if I deem your reasons trite, but execution? No," Chrysalis said, casually.
Thorax blinked.
"Now, if it turns out you're trying something silly like betraying me or any of the other havens, then I'll happily snap your neck," Chrysalis said, a brief emerald flash from her eyes and a monstrous killing intent flooded Thorax's senses so much that he staggered, bile rising in his throat.
"I hope I made my point. Now, would you kindly drop the act? I know this isn't the true you."
Thorax blinked, driving spots from his eyes and wiped his lips. He slowly rose back to his feet, shaking his head, trying to drive the memory Chrysalis' killing intent away. Even now, his body wanted to break out in a cold sweat, and the mere thought of it made him want to run and hide.
Chrysalis loved each and every one of her children. She also had a habit of brutally murdering anything or anyone that could possibly threaten them.
Thorax's eyes widened. He'd realized it logically before his departure, but now it really sunk in that Chrysalis-his queen, his mother, might be on the verge of throwing him into the second category.
He'd grown to like his new persona, but it wasn't worth it right now, was it?
Thorax, to most ponies, normally stood slightly huddled in on himself, hunched, and timid, as if he was afraid almost every new face was going to lunge at him with bug spray. Now, however, he stood up straighter, adding several inches to his height most wouldn't have guessed. His ears, normally hung low, tilted upward attentively, and overall he now he stood with more confidence, almost a spring in his step. Additionally, her body slimmed down with a flare of magic, gaining some curves, although not as much as a typical pony mare would and a few organs disappeared. "Ah," she said, her voice now moderately higher pitched and definitely feminine, if a bit gruff. "Sorry about that. I've been in character for months now, and when you showed up a part of me-eh, never mind. Why are you here, mother?"
"Impressive. Out of curiosity, why the male persona? In my experience, it's much easier to keep one's own fun holes rather than add on some sausage." Chrysalis asked with an arched eyebrow.
Thorax stared at her queen and shrugged. "I tried that for a while and it didn't really work. Apparently I was too "bitchy" and "unladylike", according to some cunts I met at a spa in Pony Town or whatever it was called, especially this one white mare I met two months back. So I might have overcompensated and went to the opposite extreme of a meek stallion. Worked out much better than I thought it would, too."
"I see." Chrysalis nodded, a hoof to her chin thoughtfully before she leveled her gaze back on Thorax, unusually serious. "Tell me, what are you looking to accomplish here?"
"E-excuse me?"
"You sever you connection to both me and the rest of Haven, embark out into a monster infested wilderness with little survival experience beyond what you had in basic training and little supplies outside an emotion stone with a week's worth of love, hide out for months doing who knows what from both ponies and other changelings,and then, instead of, you know, disguising yourself as a pony and making yourself a sob story to endear yourself to some ponies in an out of the way village, you decide to risk your life and waltz into the Pink Bitch's lair au naturel, somehow convince the drake to vouch for you through an Ancestors damned heart song, and...now what?" Chrysalis said.
Thorax, for her part, stayed silent, head downcast and eyes shadowed.
"That's what I can't figure out," Chrysalis continued. "If you were just a glutton and tired of rations in the Haven, I could get it-with your setup, you're going to be eating better than your brood sisters would in a week of rations. By the ancestors, with how close you're going to be to that little abomination Pink Bitch calls a daughter you'd probably be the most well nourished changeling on the continent." Chrysalis trailed off for a moment, an unreadable expression in her gleaming eyes.
"But, I know you're not like that, now are you? Those holes in your legs...they're too big, even with how little the Haven has had of of late. Almost as if you've been giving your rations to your others, haven't you?"
"What?" Thorax exclaimed, eyes wide. "How did you-I'm not even one of the princesses, so why-"
"Please, I'm not one of those cold hearted bitches across the sea. I care for every one of my daughters, whether they hatched out of an egg or I carried them for eleven months in my womb. One who's intentionally starving herself so her younger siblings won't go hungry wouldn't escape my notice." Chrysalis said, rolling her eyes. "So, what are you planning here? Trying to get some extra love for your little sisters ? Because, if that's the case, you would have had a much easier time doing so in the infiltrator core-,"
"You're way isn't working anymore," Thorax said suddenly, eyes shadowed
Chrysalis blinked in surprise at being interrupted, but bade her to continue.
"Tell me, when was the last time you were able to lay a clutch of eggs? In fact, in all of the daughter havens, when was the last time they had a clutch?" Thorax asked, a strange look in her eyes.
Chrysalis stared back at her, silent and eyes narrowed..
"That long, huh? I may be just a worker, nowhere close to you or the princesses. Heck, I've spent a good quarter of my life hauling stones and don't know the first thing about all the science and arcane stuff, but I'm not blind." Thorax said. "I noticed it a few years before the invasion-it's like we've become even more ravenous than before. Used to, a single pony's love would hold us for months, now it's barely a few weeks. Don't tell me you haven't noticed it, either-there's no way you would have even attempted the invasion otherwise. But, that didn't work now, did it?" Thorax said, getting up and pacing around the room to stare out the window for a few moments.
She looked back to Chrysalis,. "None of the old ways seem to be working all that well anymore, and everyone's starving. And large scale violence just...killed too many of us and wasted so much energy," she said sadly.
"But, it occurred to me, what if there's another way? What if the ponies would gladly feed us? They've got so many more of them than we have of us, maybe if...if we could be friends, then no one would have to starve? I remember asking Princess Euphoria about this and she'd just pointed out that ponies feared us and even if we tried to be friends, they'd just drive us away. But, they've release the Chaos spirit and they're friends now, so why can't we?" Thorax asked, voice filled with so much emotion and borderline desperation Chrysalis could literally taste it.
"I talked it over with my Brood sisters, but...they're not like me. The thought of leaving the Haven, of leaving their family terrified them, and they begged me not to go." Thorax laughed, although it rung oddly hollow. "In fact, they threatened to tie me down and bring it up with you if I didn't drop it. So, I just left in the middle of the night." Thorax sighed, and crossed her hooves, hugging herself. "Sweet ancestors above I miss them so much," she said, tears gathering at the corner of his eye and ears pressed downward. "But," she said, straightening with a determined look in her eyes. " I've come so far, and I'm not going to quit now."
"That's why I'm here. Maybe, just maybe, I can save us."
She waited for Chrysalis to blow up. To scream at her for being so stupid for pursuing this silly, insane dream.Really, anything at all. But, nothing happened.
Finally, so low it was almost impossible to hear, she found a sound unlike anything he'd been expecting.
A sniffle.
"M-my queen?" he asked, hushed with worry.
She lifted her head, and he nearly gasped at at the sight: she was crying. Not only that, but full tears, streaming down her face to stain the carpet below.
"Y-you," she began, a minor, almost unheard of stutter to her voice. "You, you poor deluded fool." Chrysalis said.
Thorax reared back as if struck. "What?" he asked.
Chrysalis wiped some tears away. "I, I actually like your plan, to be perfectly honest. But, you're forgetting one thing-in fact, it's the one thing all Changelings across the world share, and it just might be our defining feature, " Chrysalis said, the shakiness in her voice fading away as she regained her composure. Thorax leaned forward, confused, a little angry, but at a loss of words.
"We're parasites," Chrysalis said, a strange mixture of sadness and anger in her tone. "Forever dependent on the love of others to survive. Maybe in another world it would be possible, but here? It's like a cruel joke. We can't coexist, Thorax, because once we take love, any love, it doesn't come back!" she spat.
"That's the crux of it, Thorax. The moment you start feeding on them, you put your friendships on a timer. Sure, you may be friends with them now, you may even be able to go years if you just feed a little off of everyone, but eventually all that will be left is emptiness if you're lucky, and raw hatred if you're not. That's when they'll realize what has happened, and I pray the Ancestors smile upon you on that day, because they certainly won't."
"T-hat's..no, you're wrong," Thorax whispered, wide eyed. That...was that true? No, they'd drained ponies but...
She hadn't thought of it much before, it just wasn't her area. She hauled rocks and occasionally helped care for young ones, but...now that she thought about it, had she ever seen a pony fully recovered; one who wasn't left numb and hollow to the world, no spark left in them after they were done feeding?
Her legs started shaking, and she collapsed to the floor.
Chrysalis got up, and smiled sadly. "It's happened before, Thorax.Time and time again through the ages someone like you has popped up with the noblest intentions, only to fail-some spectacularly, others with but a whimper, but..." Chrysalis sighed. "Every. Last. One. With no exceptions, their so called "friends" inevitably turned on them."
"Yo-you're wrong. You have to be," Thorax whispered.
"Don't believe me? Reestablish our link. I'll open myself completely to you, and then you'll know if I'm lying," Chrysalis closed her eyes, and for the first time that night she truly felt her queen and mother's warm, comforting presence, just like when she was little. Normally, changelings kept up some form of resistance, a wall between their minds only bridged by unique links made by the members of a haven. To completely lower her defenses was to anyone, even close family, was to open her up to any number of vicious attacks from other Changelings or certain other predatory psychics that even she, as a powerful Queen, would be unable to shrug off.
If she was going this far, then mother was absolutely serious.
Thorax went still, but made no other moves.
Chrysalis opened her eyes a few moments later. She studied Thorax for a few moments. "You know, I don't really blame you," she said, looking away. "The thought of a world where our food doesn't routinely try to kill us sounds rather nice, in all honesty."
She walked over to the door, shifting into the shape of a cream colored mare with blonde hair in Crystal guard armor with a cutie mark of an emerald halberd."I won't force you to come back to Haven," she said, still in her original voice. "It's up to you to choose your own destiny. Who knows, maybe you'll prove me wrong and you'll succeed where hundreds, possibly thousands of others have failed. But, know that when all else fails, and the rest of the world has turned against you, you will always have a place among us."
Thorax didn't respond.
"For what it's worth, good luck," she said and stepped out, leaving Thorax alone for the night.
Author's Note
Well that's finally finished. Started writing it after I watched Times are a Changeling, finished the roughdraft that night, decided it was shit two days later, rewrote everything including Thorax's current personality, and this is the end result.
It was supposed to be a lot funnier, but it got serious somewhere along the way. It also bloomed from an approximately 1000 word drabble into four thousand word piece.
I blame Chrysalis, Thorax, and addiction to throwing world building in every story I write. Chrysalis because, as much as I love writing her as a psychotic bitch who hates Cadence more than any other being on the planet, she is a three dimensional character in my setting who interacts differently with different individuals and acting that same way towards one of her own changelings wouldn't make sense. I blame Thorax because he somehow grew his own character while I wasn't looking and changed almost every bit of this story, and world building...yeah I don't regret that. I had fun, but it fundamentally changed the story, so there's that.
I'm honestly not sure if I like how this came out, but it is what it is.
I don't know if I'll come back to this. Maybe? Quite a bit I could try and do with this incarnation of Thorax, so I guess I'll just wait and see.
As always any feedback and constructive criticism is welcome. They're the only way I'll ever learn from my own mistakes and grow as a writer, after all. Flames will be used to roast delicious marshmallows.
