Mr. Original in: The Ticket Master

Chapters

"Nine, plus ten, equals 910!" XD
'I wanna play in the rain!' "Yeah? Well, F*CK you."
'Happy Easter!' "(T_T) ...It's September, dumbass."
"I got an invitation? (O_O) ...You're joking!"

"Nine, plus ten, equals 910!" XD

Author's Note

Me: Now, I did tell everyone that the Theme Song title will most likely have a connection with the story, right?
Conscience: s=/ Um... I think so...
Me: Oh, okay, good.

Alright then, we have more than just my character tag today. But I won't show them in the Author's Note.
...Only mine.

"Nine, plus ten, equals 910!" XD

Mr. Original’s Dictionary
Original Edition

Explosive Intro
/ikˈsplōsiv intrō/
n.

-when James/Conscience makes their appearance by Exploding into view

***

Facewhip
/fās'(h)wip/
vb.

-when one facepalms so hard that it sounds like a whip

Twilight and Applejack walked down the dirt path of Sweet Apple acres, two baskets hanging the from their backs. On top of Twilight's back was Spike, who was searching through the apples in one of her baskets, and throwing out certain ones.

"Nope. Nope...," he threw out another apple.

While he was doing that, Applejack spoke up. "Thank ya kindly, Twilight, for helping me out. Ah bet Big Macintosh Ah could get all these Golden Delicious in the barn by lunchtime. If Ah win, he's gonna walk down Stirrup Street in one of Granny's girdles," she chuckled.

"No problem at all, Applejack," Twilight smiled at her. "I'm glad the goal is lunchtime. All this hard work is making me hungry."

"I know, right?" Spike agreed as he recklessly threw an apple behind him, hitting Twilight on the head. He smiled nervously as Twilight deadpanned at him.

"Ooh-wee, Spike. You've been lounging on my back all morning while we worked."

"Exactly. You two are taking so long, I missed snack-time," Spike responded. As if on cue, Twilight's stomach grumbled.

She laughed nervously, "Eh, I guess we better get some food." She then looked around in confusion as the rumbling continued. She knew it wasn't coming from her stomach. The sound seemed to come from everywhere at once. Spike heard it too. Along with Applejack, who was about to question it, when a voice loudly rang out.

"THIS IS JAAAY!"

Everyone jumped, startled, when a pillar-shaped explosion suddenly occurred a good five yards away. The explosion dissipated as quickly as it happened. And left in it's wake was the one, the only, the Third-- James. Dramatically epic music played as he took off his sunglasses.
No sooner did he do that did his state of mind make himself known.

"See, I told you different doors lead to different areas," Conscience said to James from behind him.

"I agreed with you," James glared at him. "Let's just hope our neighbor's door is still locked."

"James!" Twilight beamed.

James was taken aback and nearly stumbled when she ran up to him (causing Spike to fall off) and hugged him. "Well, It's good to see someone missed me," James smiled in amusement as he returned the hug.

KLPOW!

Conscience was suddenly in front of Spike, who was picking himself up. "Spike. How's my favorite dragon?"

"Hey, Conscience! Not doing too bad," Spike smiled as he fist pumped Conscience.

"Applejack," James nodded as he walked over to her, Twilight following behind.

"Howdy, partner. How's it been?" Applejack greeted.

"Meh," James shrugged. "Well, it's been a rather fuzzy week. I've been doing my thing, Conscience's been giving me a hard time, he kicked my ass, I kicked his ass... usual stuff."

"Um, yeah, that's great sugarcube," Applejack sounded slightly uneasy.

"It's great to see you again," Twilight said happily.

"Well I'm glad, because I happened to bring company this time," James held his hands behind his back.

"What do you mean?" Spike asked.

Just then, they heard a whistling sound as if something was falling. They barely had a chance to look up before a figure suddenly impacted the ground with its feet (and hands for balance), causing it to shake for a second, and causing the ponies to stumble. As it stood up, Twilight realized that it looked a lot like James. Though it had a white hat and shirt, and dark grey overalls, as well as the letters 'AM' on the hat.

As it exchanged a glance with James, another figure appeared from the sky. It seemed to be flipping at a very fast rate. Once it floated down only a couple yards from the ground, it stopped spinning and landed. This one had a white hat and shirt like the other one. However, it had black overalls and an 'A' on the hat. While the first one was James's height, this one was a few inches shorter.

The next one came down, spinning his legs around like he was a helicopter. This one had a little more color: blue hat and shirt, and red overalls, and 'BS' on the hat. Like the previous one, he was a little shorter than James.

His eyes widened when he saw Twilight, Applejack, and Spike. He was going to say something, but James pointed at him and shook his head as he gave him a death glare.

Just then, everyone heard music.

As the music got closer, another one came riding down on what looked like a large cat with a strawberry Pop Tart for a body. As the cat hovered a few feet above the ground, it jumped off. Afterward, the cat took back to the sky, a rainbow trail in its wake. The music faded away as it left. This one had a black hat and shirt like James, but had red overalls like the last one. He was taller than the last two, the same height as James. Where the letter on everyone's hat was black, this one had a red letter on his: the letter 'X.'

As soon as the music was out of earshot, a voice was getting closer from above. “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa--!!”

CRASH!

Another one painfully plummeted to the ground, head-first. It cursed under it's breath before shooting up. "I'm okay!" This one had a red letter like the last one on his hat: an 'S.' He was also one of the shorter ones. The most unique thing about his clothes though were that they rapidly changed colors.

James turned to Twilight, Spike, and Applejack. "Now, why don't I introduce you to my family," James gestured behind him.

"This here is my best friend, Arthur," he pointed to a tall one with the dark grey overalls. "He's probably the most level-headed guy of the group... including me. Plus, he rivals me in reference skills.

"This guy?" he pointed to the shorter one with the black overalls, "This is Atario. Very submissive, if you know what I mean." By submissive, James meant the type of submissions they do in wrestling.

"This one here with the blue hat is my younger brother, Blue Star," he pointed at the shorter one with the 'BS' on his hat. "He is similar to a ninja. The most loudest, artistic, and non-formal ass***e you will ever meet." At that, Blue Star glared at him from behind.

"Here, with the 'X' on his hat, is my other younger brother, Red X. Words cannot describe him very accurately. Not because I can't..." he turned to Red X. "...But because I don't want to. Moving on!" James cleared his throat.

"Finally, is the drunkard of the gang," he pointed to the one with the trippy-colored clothing. "...Stario. Though that is nothing short of amazing, because his senses do not seem to deteriorate under influence.

"Alright guys," James turned to face his peers. "This is Applejack. She's an apple farmer in this very place we stand: Sweet Apple Acres," he gestured to the orange pony with the stetson. "This is Twilight, the librarian. And on her back is her dragon assistant, Spike," he pointed to Twilight. "Welp, we're acquainted!" James Signature Shrugged (though he didn't shake his head). There was an awkward silence (for whatever damn reason), which James laughed Cheerfully as it didn't go unnoticed. As everyone continued to stand still, he got impatient.

"Well don't just stand there, say 'hi!' Shake hands, um... hooves.... Damn it, do something!" he exclaimed.

Hesitantly, Arthur was the first. He went over to Twilight and shook her hoof. "Hello," he nodded. "Hey," he shook Spike's hand. "How are you doin'?" he went to Applejack to shake her hand. He was a bit shaken afterward, Applejack had a mean grip.

As he walked back his initial spot while shaking the sore feeling from his hand, Stario walked up to Applejack. She was taken aback when he raised her hoof to his face and kissed it. "Might I be the one to say that you look very nice?" Stario waggled his eyebrows. Everyone's jaw dropped. As they recovered, James Facewhipped while--

POP!

...Conscience Pop Fainted.

"Okay then, good talk!" Atario said rather loudly as he grabbed Stario's hand and pulled him away. He looked towards Applejack, "Sorry. He does that with all girls. Like James said, he's a drunkard."

"Like James also said," Stario spoke up as he harshly pulled his hand back. "...I'm good at controlling my actions even when under influence. Feeling dumb yet?" he waggled his eyebrows.

James got up. "Fair enough."

He was going to ask Applejack what they were up to, when Blue Star spoke up. "You do know you don't have any clo--"

SMACK!

The impact sounded like a whip as James violently slapped him across the face. Upon recovering, Blue Star grit his teeth. "Oh, you're going to regret that," he said darkly.

"Make me," James responded in the same voice.

Before they could jump at each other, Spike belched out a scroll. Blue Star, Stario, Red X, Atario, and (especially) Arthur did not seem shocked or impressed by this (since James told them a lot about Equestria before they went there). In fact, Arthur broke into a brief song.

[♪We just got a le-tter.

We just got a le-tter.

I wonder who it's from!♪](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--Je6qZ91_4)

"It's a letter from Princess Celestia," Twilight said as the letter floated into Spike's grasp.

At that, Stario, Blue Star, Red X, and Conscience rolled on the ground as they burst out laughing. Arthur smirked as he got the intended reaction. Atario bit his lip, trying not to crack up. And James just smiled in amusement.

"Ahem," Spike cleared his throat as he opened the parchment and began to read.

"Hear ye, hear ye. Her Grand Royal Highness, Princess Celestia of Equestria..."

"The Princess is so full of herself," Arthur muttered.

"That's what I said!" James and Conscience whispered in unison. Spike continued,

"...is pleased to announce the Grand Galloping Gala to be held in the magnificent capital city of Canterlot, on the 21st day of... eh, yadda yadda yadda... cordially extends an invitation to Twilight Sparkle plus one guest."

"The Grand Galloping Gala!" Twilight and Applejack gasped.

'I wanna play in the rain!' "Yeah? Well, F*CK you."

Author's Note

WARNING: Lots of eyebrow actions ensue. Please proceed with caution.

You have been warned...

'I wanna play in the rain!' "Yeah? Well, F*CK you."

Atario, Stario, and Arthur knew James was going to blow any second. Therefore, Atario had already given them all Invincible Stars, just in case. His Stars always lasted a good sixteen to seventeen seconds. They watched as the Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie argued endlessly. It was only a matter of time.

James, who had stopped Facewhipping, was literally boiling mad like a tea kettle. His eyes suddenly burst into flames. "SHUT THE F*** UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!" he shouted loudly.

That got everyone's attention. The guys quietly sighed from behind him, greatly relieved that he didn't level a building. Or the town.

The raging flames in James's eyes dissipated as the guys' Stars ended. He sighed as he walked up to Twilight. "Twilight... please calm them down. I'm going to take a walk. Hopefully then, I won't be too ready to blow something up." Twilight looked on as James walked down the street. She then turned to everyone behind her.

"Girls, there's no use arguing."

"But Twilight--" Rarity protested.

"EH!" Twilight put her hoof up, cutting her off. "This is my decision, and I'm gonna make it on my own. And I certainly can't think straight with all this noise." Her stomach growled again. "...Not to mention hunger. Now go on, shoo." The other five mares muttered in disdain as they reluctantly parted.

"And don't worry, I'll figure this out!" Twilight called after them. "...Somehow."

Twilight, Spike, Arthur, Atario, and Stario were at a restaurant table, each sitting on top of a mound of grass.

"Spike, what am I gonna do? All five of my best friends have really good reasons to go to the gala," Twilight began pulling single petals from one of the flowers in the vase that sat in the middle of the table. "Applejack, or Rainbow Dash? Pinkie Pie or Fluttershy, Rarity... oh, who should go with me?" she deadpanned as she licked the petals into her mouth and ate them.

"I think you're overthinking this. Technically, you did ask Applejack first. Before Rainbow Dash showed up out of nowhere, and sort of made a big fuss out of it in the first place," Arthur spoke up.

"Have you made your decision?" a waiter walked up to the table.

"I CAN'T DECIDE!" Twilight shouted, drawing the other customers' attention.

"Twilight, he just wants to take your order," Spike intoned while pointing at the menu.

Twilight paused, embarrassed. "Oh... I would love a daffodil and daisy sandwich."

"Do you have any rubies?" Spike asked, which got no reply from the waiter. "...No? Okay. I'll have the hay fries, extra crispy."

"And for you?" the waiter asked as he looked at Arthur, Atario, and Stario.

"Oh no, we're good, thank you," Arthur declined politely. They had all eaten a large breakfast before James took them there.

"Aw, I wanted something hard to drink," Stario complained as the waiter walked away.

"Not with your behavior today," Atario disagreed.

"What are you, my mom?" Stario glared at him.

"What do you think, Spike?" Twilight asked.

"I think we have to try another restaurant. I mean, I like grass just fine, but would it hurt anybody to offer some gemstones?"

"If this place is in any way similar to ours, they'd use those as currency... in special cases. And I'm pretty sure ponies don't eat their currency," Stario replied.

"I mean about the Gala and the ticket and who I should take," Twilight clarified.

"Oh. You're still on that?" Spike rolled his eyes.

"Spike, listen!" Twilight leaned over, launching the vase full of flowers. "How do I choose? And when I do choose, will the other four be mad at me? I mean, I could give up my ticket and give away two, but that would still leave three disappointed ponies. What if I--"

"Ah, your food," the waiter returned with Twilight and Spike's order.

"Daaaaaaaaaaamn!" Stario exclaimed quietly. "That was quick." Spike immediately started scarfing down the fries.

Twilight sounded relieved. "This looks so good! I'm sure everything will be much clearer once I eat." As she levitated the sandwich to her mouth, she paused as all the other ponies who were dining frantically ran inside the restaurant.

"Um, madam? Are you going to eat your food in ze rain?" the waiter asked from the door as one last pony ran through it.

"It's not raining... What's going on?" Twilight looked around and sure enough, it was raining at a fair rate. No wonder everyone else left for the indoors. But why wasn't it raining on them?

"...Has weather gone too far?" Stario asked dramatically to no one in particular.

"No, James said they can control weather here," Arthur answered.

"Oh," Stario paused. "Well, ...have ponies gone too far?"

That's when they heard a voice from above. "Hi there, best friend forever I've ever ever had. Enjoying the sunny weather?" Everyone looked up to see none other than Rainbow Dash, who was on top of a rain cloud. Behind her was Celestia's beautiful shining sun.

"Rainbow Dash, what are you doing?" Twilight asked skeptically.

"Whaddya mean? I just saw the smartest, most generous pony about to get rained on, so I thought I'd kick a hole in the clouds to keep her dry so she could dine in peace, that's all."

"Oh, I see what this is," Arthur facepalmed.

"Pretty low if you ask me," Atario agreed.

"Rainbow, you're not trying to get extra consideration for the extra ticket by doing me extra special favors, are you?" Twilight narrowed her eyes.

"Me? No no no, of course not." Rainbow said cheerfully.

"Uh-huh," Twilight wasn't convinced.

"*cough* Liar! *cough*" Stario said into his hand, in which Atario put his hands over his mouth to prevent from cracking up.

"Seriously, I'd do it for anypony," Rainbow laughed uneasily as other ponies scurried in various directions to find shelter.

"Rainbow, I am not comfortable accepting unwanted favors, so I'd appreciate it if you close up that rain cloud right now."

"Ugh. Fine," Rainbow groaned as she closed the hole in the cloud shut which a resounding *zip.*

"That's better," Twilight smiled as she levitated her sandwich to her mouth again... only for her to suddenly get drenched in rain. Her sandwich was not shown any mercy either. Spike held his hands over his mouth and stifled a laugh.

Guess who showed up out of nowhere... again? "Twilight, it's raining," Rarity said rather nonchalantly from under an intricately decorated umbrella.

"No. Really?" Twilight replied sarcastically.

"Come with me before you catch a cold," Rarity grabbed Twilight and pulled her away.

Arthur and Stario exchanged glances, but then saw two figures running towards them. As they got closer, they recognized them as...

"Red X? Blue Star? Where've you guys been?" Atario asked.

"Well, a certain someone passed out during the big hoof-wrestling match. I'm not going to point any fingers- Blue Star," Red X deadpanned.

"Hey, it's not my fault you decided to wait for me to wake up! You could've just woke me up, and we probably wouldn't be caught in this mess," Blue Star shot back.

Red X was going to retort a witty remark, when Arthur interrupted him. "Will you two knock it off? Let's go already!" Arthur followed after Twilight and Rarity.

"Were are we going?" Red X asked.

Twilight shook herself off, looking back to her usual self. She laughed nervously, however, when she noticed the wet condition she'd accidentally put Rarity in. "Heh... oops. Sorry."

"Oh no, it's quite all right. After all, we are... the best of friends, are we not? And you know what the best of friends do?"

"Uh...," Twilight stuttered.

Blue Star's eyes widened. "Rarity was just wet a second ago, but now she's dry, and she didn't even shake it off like Twilight did!" he whispered to Red X.

Red X, stared blankly before coming to an absurd (and joking) conclusion. "Sorcery!"

"Makeovers!" Rarity sing-songed as she pulled over a dressing wall (for whatever reason).

"D'oh!" Stario exclaimed as he, Arthur, Stario, Red X, Blue Star, and Spike were all harshly launched across the room.

The place literally shook as Rarity went wild, dust (yes, dust!) often trailed from behind the wall.

"Someone's hard at work," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"What the f*coin* is she using!?" Arthur squinted in confusion. "It's sounds like tools a mechanic would use!"

"That sounds... f*Atari*d up," Atario said, his expression filled with shock. And that was saying something; he, following James, was the second best with mechanic tools.

"Am I the only one who thinks the concept of dressing a pony is ironic? Ow!" Blue Star asked, in which Red X slapped him upside the back of his head.

"That was for James," Red X deadpanned.

"There. Oh, you're simply darling," Rarity gushed as she finished.

"Uum... yeah, it is kinda pretty, isn't it?" Twilight smiled in admiration as she looked at herself. Stario whistled while he waggled his eyebrows. Fortunately, it was quiet enough to go unnoticed by anyone besides Red X, Atario, Blue Star, and Arthur (who hit Stario in his shoulder).

Spike, who was doing a gagging gesture, was startled to the point of accidentally sticking his whole hand into his throat when Rarity suddenly appeared in front of him.

"And you. Oh Spike, I have a dandy little outfit for the dashing gent," she said as she pulled over the dressing wall. Spike fruitlessly attempted to escape. The guys listened as Spike was going through the same treatment Twilight got mere seconds ago.

"That's a mean grip," Atario raised an eyebrow.

"I wonder if she's using a hammer?" Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"So she can make clothing for others besides ponies," Red X noted.

Twilight giggled as Spike was done being worked on. "Oh, Spike."

"Someone's trying to impress a lady," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"...LOL wut," Blue Star smiled in amusement.

"Now you just need a hat," Rarity said as she put on said accessory.

"Ugh, I told you, I don't want any part of this girly gala gunk. See you back at the library," Spike zoomed out of the house.

"Oh, who needs him anyway," Rarity waved her hoof dismissively as she pulled a full-view mirror in front of Twilight. "This is all about you, and how fabulous you'll look at the Grand Galloping Gala."

Twilight froze. "Wait, the Grand--"

Rarity gasped, cutting Twilight off. "And oh, my goodness, what a coincidence. I happen to have an ensemble of my own, that matches yours to a T. We would be the belles of the ball, you and I. Everyone would be clamoring for our attention. All eyes would be on us, and then everyone would finally know, the most beautiful, most talented, most sophisticated pony in all of Equestria is Rarity the unicorn!"

She laughed nervously at the deadpan look Twilight was giving her. "Ah, and Twilight Sparkle, of course.

"I see what's going on," Twilight pointed an accusing hoof at Rarity.

"Heheh, epic fail," Blue Star muttered.

"You're just buttering me up so I give you the extra ticket. Well it's not gonna work," Twilight threw the outfit at Rarity, who ducked in time. The necklace did perch on her horn, however. "You're going to have to wait for my decision just like everyone else. Now if you'll excuse me, I've been trying all day just to get some lunch!" she exclaimed as she went the door, the guys following.

She recoiled as Applejack suddenly poked her head through the door. "Did somepony say 'lunch?'" she said as she pulled Twilight outside. When Twilight looked up, her jaw dropped at what she saw. In front of her was a huge cartload of apple-related sweets (especially pies).

"You've got to be kidding me!" Twilight exclaimed.

"I know, right!" Blue Star exclaimed. "All those sweets, and not a single cookie." Arthur deadpanned at him before smacking him in the back of his head.

"I hope Applejack doesn't expect her to eat all that," Atario said uneasily.

"I hope she used butter," Stario waggled his eyebrows. At that comment, Red X squinted in confusion before punching him in the shoulder.

Just then, they saw James walking towards them. "I hope you saved room for dessert," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"Hell no," James furrowed his eyebrows.

"Oh, you ate?" Red X asked.

"No. I just don't want any dessert," James answered.

"You're such a buzzkill," Blue Star crossed his arms. James grunted in irritation as he looked over to see Twilight and Applejack. He raised an eyebrow when his eyes fell on the large cart full of various apple dishes.

"What's the occasion?" he asked.

"Applejack's trying to bribe Twilight with food for the ticket, if I had to guess," Atario answered.

James's other eyebrow rose. "Uh... is she supposed to eat all that?"

"That's what I said!" Atario agreed. "What boggles me is where she got the time to cook all this. And I know she didn't take them from storage, they smell like they're fresh from the oven."

"If that's the case, then she is very efficient," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"Ah got apple pie, apple fritters, apple tarts, apple dumplings..." As Applejack continued to name the food, Twilight's (and Blue Star's) pupils were growing. "...Apple crisps, apple crumblers, and apple Brown Betty. Uh, the dessert, not my auntie. What do you say there, best friend?" Applejack asked. Twilight's stomach growled again as she furrowed her eyebrows in realization. "Is that a yes?"

"No... no!" Twilight exclaimed, startling Applejack into launching the apple brown betty, the poor dish landing on the ground. A single tear ran down Blue Star's cheek. Such a terribly tragic waste, it was.

"I don't know who I'm giving the ticket to. And all these favors aren't making it any easier to decide. In fact, I'm less sure now than I was this morning! Ugh!" Twilight groaned loudly before running past Applejack.

"So, that's a maybe?" Applejack watched as she disappeared in the distance.

"Probably not," Arthur deadpanned.

"Well, you have my vote," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

"Surprisingly, I lost my appetite," Red X intoned.

"My insides hurt," James catch-phrased.

"Well, darn, I couldn't possibly let all this food go to waste-- ow!" Blue Star flinched as Red X smacked him in the back of his head. "What the heck!"

"That's for James," Red X droned.

"Damn it, let James speak for himse-- OW!" Blue Star cried as James smacked him in the same spot Red X smacked him.

"...You guys are ass*sword brandish*," he rubbed the back of his head.

'Happy Easter!' "(T_T) ...It's September, dumbass."

"Ugh, I never thought being showered with favors would be so aggravating," Twilight groaned as she and the guys approached her library tree.

"This is where you live?" Blue Star asked in awe. "OMG, so lucky."

Twilight opened the door with her magic to reveal Fluttershy humming (the theme song) while tidying up the house, along with several other small creatures. There was a squirrel dusting the place with its tail... actually that's what all the animals were doing, except Fluttershy herself, who was scrubbing the walls with a brush.

Twilight gasped, "Fluttershy, not you too."

Fluttershy turned to the source of the voice. "Oh, well, hello Twilight. I hope you don't mind, but we're all doing a little spring cleaning for you."

"It's summer," Twilight and James deadpanned in unison.

Fluttershy blushed. "Oh... well... better late than never, right? It was Angel's idea," she looked over at the bunny everyone encountered earlier, who was tossing salad. He smiled and saluted when he heard his name.

"Anyone can cook," Arthur smirked, causing Stario and Blue Star to fall on the floor, cracking up. Red X covered his mouth with his hand as he snorted in laughter several times. James simply smiled in amusement.

"Oh, well that was nice of him," Atario said cheerfully as the guys recovered.

"You're not doing this for the ticket, are you?" Twilight narrowed her eyes.

"Oh no," Fluttershy assured as innocent as ever, sarcastically speaking. "I'm doing this because you're my very best friend. Right, Angel?" she asked, looking at said bunny. Angel just stared at her with a flat look, causing all the guys to collapse into a laughing fit again.

"Oh... yes. We are just doing this for the ticket," Fluttershy said sincerely as Angel offered her the salad. Too bad for him.

Twilight's stomach rumbled again. "No no no!" she literally blew Angel back by shouting, before walking to the door. "Well, this was all very nice of you and Angel, but I'm not accepting any extra favors until I've made my final decision, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave," she said sternly as she opened the door and pointed outside.

"SURPRIIIIISE!" a chorus of voices shouted as confetti rained on Twilight. A few party horns blew in her face, before Pinkie shot in and pulled her outside. Music started playing as Pinkie started singing while she, and a group of other ponies, repeatedly tossed her in the air.

♪Twilight is my bestest friend

Whoopie, whoopie!♪

"Pinkie...," Twilight fruitlessly tried to get her attention.

♪She's the cutest, smartest, all around best pony, pony♪

"Did she just f***ing call her cute!?" Conscience suddenly came out from behind an eyebrow-furrowing James, whose irises turned red.

♪I bet if I throw a super-duper fun party, party...♪

"Pinkie...," Twilight tried again.

"RRRRRRRRR--!" James started growling.

♪She'll give her extra ticket to the Gala to me!♪

James, whose eyes burst into flames, opened his mouth to Explode a loud comment, but Twilight beat him to it, causing his eyes' fire to dissipate. They were still red, however. "PIIINKIEEEEE!"

Pinkie and the other ponies abruptly stopped. As they gave Twilight some room to land (...which was rather f*cking impolite). Fortunately...

KLPOW!

James and Conscience Flashed under her, catching her, and letting her onto the ground.

"Yes, Twilight?" Pinkie blinked a few times, causing James to Facewhip.

"At least the other ponies tried to be subtle about the ticket," Twilight glared.

A light purple pony with a beige mane and tail from the crowd spoke up. "Wait, what ticket? What gala?"

James still had his face in his hand. "Frankly, this is none of your bu--"

"Oh, you didn't know? Twilight has an extra ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala!" Pinkie replied.

"The Grand Galloping Gala!?" practically the entire group of ponies exclaimed in unison, as Twilight looked around frantically.

She didn't get much time to think, as suddenly, all the ponies surrounded her while offering favors and compliments. Spike suddenly ran through the crowd, grabbing Twilight. Conscience Flashed over to catch up with them. They stopped in front of a pink mare with a lime-colored mane and tail.

"Would you like any help with your gardening?" she held up some daisies. Twilight, Spike, and Conscience turned around, only to run into a light blue mare with a white mane and tail.

"I have an cartload of extra carrots," she said as she held up said vegetable. Other ponies took this opportunity to surround her and continue to try and persuade her to give them the ticket.

"What're we gonna do?" Spike asked Twilight as he got a hold on her back.

"We're... gonna... RUUUN!" Twilight high-tailed it past the crowd and ran as quickly as her legs could carry her (and Spike). Conscience Flashed to catch up. Good timing too, because the crowd started running after them.

Meanwhile, James Hand Cracked his fists as he glared at the crowd of ponies disappearing into the distance. He walked over to the guys, and in front of Arthur, before he turned his back.

"Arthur, hit me," he intoned. Arthur obliged as he jumped above James, and violently stomped on his head, knocking him unconscious.

As he fell forward onto the ground, Atario spoke up. "I thought you had to EX EX Super Jump to kick that hard."

"No, I don't. I could, but it'd be overdoing it when I land. That would level some nearby buildings," Arthur answered.

"...Oh... so it's not overdoing it when we're fighting then?" Atario asked sarcastically.

"No. Besides, you guys know how to shield yourselves from it. So yeah... it's a last resort. Otherwise it's overkill, just as intended," Arthur said. "You're one to talk. You have a full-length song."

"All of us do! If anything, we should be complaining about James. He has five whole ones... not to mention his fifty other part-time ones."

"You know what... I can't argue with that. Let's agree to disagree."

"Fine by me," Atario shrugged as they carried James inside.

Twilight, Spike and Conscience ran behind the cart of sweets Applejack had offered to them earlier. They peeked from behind as the oblivious crowd ran past them. Unfortunately, a cream-colored pony popped out of the door of a nearby building, and spotted them... along with the pink pony who offered to help with gardening.

The crowd turned around and continued to chase the again-running gang. They were running so hard, a yellow pony with an orange mane and tail toppled and fell over. Conscience almost stopped just to laugh at her, because she didn't look fazed at all. In fact, she looked like she was having the time of her life.

The crowd ran past a purple pony with a blue bonnet dress, who was rolling a stroller. As the crowd passed by, the mare looked up, revealing to be Twilight. She looked at Spike, who was dressed as a baby. Conscience, who used a Mini Mushroom, popped out from behind Spike's head.

As they continued running, the yellow mare who fell noticed them, and directed the crowd in their direction. They ran across the bridge, unaware that Twilight and Spike were holding on to the bridge from underneath. Spike stood 'up' and wiped his brow with his hand. Before physics finally decided to try and drop him into the water 'above.' Fortunately, he fell right into the arms of Conscience (he used a Super Mushroom), who was floating right under them by kicking his legs really hard. A trick he and James learned from Luigi.

The crowd of ponies ran past a shop with ponnequins wearing silly outfits on display. However, they missed Twilight, who was dressed as a clown; Spike, who was dressed as a hula dancer, and especially Conscience, who had on an Invisible Cap from Super Mario 64.

Conscience, Spike, Twilight skidded to a halt next to some crates as they were cornered by all the the other ponies, who continued to press for favors to get the ticket. Conscience's Invisible Cap ran out, causing him to reappear.

"Son of a bitch pudding," he cursed under his breath.

The ponies got even closer to them, before Conscience got an idea. Then he mentally Sonic Facepalmed for not coming up with the idea earlier. The ponies recoiled when, Conscience summoned a pipe in between them. He did not wait for them. He grabbed Spike and placed him inside. Twilight caught on, and jumped in. Conscience took the time to put up a sign that read 'Sold out,' before jumping in after them. The pipe retreated back into the ground, leaving all the ponies looking around in confusion.

Twilight, Spike, and Conscience (in that order) lightly jumped out of the pipe, and landed on the wooden floor of Twilight's library.

"Wow, that was close. Nice save, Conscience," Spike thanked him.

"Sure thing," Conscience patted his shoulder.

"Quick, lock the doors!" Twilight commanded. She ran up to the balcony and blew out the light before slamming the doors. Spike slammed the front doors. They then proceed to turn out all the lights. Twilight and Spike sighed in relief and exchanged an exhausted smile when Conscience spoke up.

"Did you guys really have to slam the doors?"

"Sorry, but we were in a hurry," Spike defended.

"I know, but you could've done it quietly. James and I do it all the time."

"Hey, who turned out the lights?" Suddenly, the lights turned on to reveal James, who was still sleeping. He was surrounded by the guys: Red X, Atario, Arthur, Blue Star, and the source of the spoken voice that was Stario (who had turned the light on).

Twilight looked up, and her relief immediately was short-lived when she saw Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Fluttershy at the window. Simply the sight of them caused her to yell in frustration.

"YAAAAAH!"

James shot up to his feet like he was on fast forward. "What, what happened!?" he looked around frantically before Twilight kept ranting.

"I can't decide, I just can't decide! It's important to all of you and I just can't stand to disappoint any of you, and giving me gifts and doing me favors won't make any difference, because you're all my friends. And I wanna make you all happy, and I can't. I just can't!" she put her hooves on top of her head as she lie on the ground.

Applejack walked up to her and rest a hoof on her head, causing her to look up. "Twilight, sugar, A-Ah didn't mean to put so much pressure on you. And if it helps... Ah don't want the ticket anymore. You can give it to somepony else. Ah won't feel bad, Ah promise."

"...Give her the f*coin*ing ticket," Arthur said quietly to Spike as he deadpanned before Fluttershy flew over to Twilight.

"Me too. I feel just awful that I made you feel so awful," she looked at the ground.

"And me too," Pinkie spoke up. "It's no fun upsetting your friends." James rolled his eyes, though the girls didn't see him since his hat covered his eyes from where they were standing.

"Twilight, it was unfair of me to try to force you as I did," Rarity said.

"She's sorry," Stario waggled his eyebrows.

Rainbow shot into the air. "Yes! That means the ticket is mi-- WHOA!" she narrowly (and accidentally) dodged a sword thrown in her direction. She looked down with wide eyes as she looked at the guys (which was the direction the sword came from) to see Atario, Arthur, Red X, and Stario looking at her with a shocked expression.

Blue Star looked frantic. "That wasn't me," he said as he pointed to Conscience, who pointed to a gun he pulled out, before pointing at Rainbow. She wilted when she saw James, who was next to Conscience, giving her a death stare, literal flames in his eyes.

"You know, I haven't perfected my signature moves for the Wonderbolts anyway. I don't need that ticket either," she laughed nervously.

"We all got so gun-ho about going to the gala that we couldn't see how un-gun-ho we were making you," Appplejack finished.

"We're sorry, Twilight," the girls said in unison. Twilight smiled for once in a long time that day.

"Spike, take down a note." Spike pulled out a quill and parchment (wherever the f*ck he got that from).

"Dear Princess Celestia," Twilight began,

"I've learned that one of the joys of friendship is sharing your blessings, but when there's not enough blessings to go around, having more than your friends can make you feel pretty awful. So, though I appreciate the invitation, I will be returning both tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala."

"What!?" everyone exclaimed in unison (and James and Conscience Exploded simultaneously). Twilight continued.

"If my friends can't all go, I don't want to go either."

"Twilight, ya don't have to do that," Applejack protested.

"So, I stuck around and risked killing someo-- mmph mmm!" James was cut off as Conscience locked his head in his arms, covering his mouth.

"Nope. I've made up my mind. Spike, you can send the letter now," Twilight said. Spike opened the window before breathing green fire on the parchment, sending the letter.

"Now you won't get to go to the Gala either," Fluttershy said to Twilight. Conscience, who let go of James, deadpanned as he held up a sign that read '2 Obvious 4 Me.'

"It's okay, girls. I couldn't possibly enjoy myself without my best friends there with me," she said as the girls (and Blue Star) gathered up for a group hug. "So I would rather not go at all."

Spike did a gagging gesture, which caused James to snap.

KLPOW!

He was in front of Spike. "You can't stand that sort of thing, we get it! You don't have to keep rubbing it in, damn i-- HO-LY SH**!" James ducked, narrowly missing the flame that Spike belched out. The flame turned into a scroll.

"A letter from the Princess? That was fast," Twilight smiled. Arthur was going to sing 'we just got a letter,' but Red X stopped him and shook his head.

"My faithful student Twilight,

Why didn't you just say so in the first place?"

Several tickets suddenly stuck out from the parchment. "Twelve tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala!"

Conscience's eyes widened. "Say whaaaaaaa--"

POP!

He Pop Fainted.

The girls gasped in unison. "Now we can all go!" Twilight said happily as they all cheered.

"Yeah, one for each of us," Atario said in confusion. "It's almost as if she knew that we were here."

"Yeah, that is weird," Arthur agreed.

"Princess intuition?" Stario guessed while waggling his eyebrows.

Everyone stopped as Twilight's stomach grumbled again. Twilight laughed nervously as Rarity spoke up.

"Allow us to treat you to dinner." As they walked out the door (including Conscience who recovered), a ticket floated out of Spike's hand to each of them.

Spike looked down in dismay, "How come I didn't get a ticket to the Gala?" Abruptly, he belched out another scroll. He opened it up.

"And one for you, Spike," it read as another ticket popped out of the parchment. He excitedly ran out of the library laughing with the ticket in his hand. He stopped when he saw Applejack giving him a strange smile.

He put on an act. "I mean, gross! I have to go too?" as he continued walking.

Applejack laughed as she followed after them. As she caught up, Red X looked to his right, at Blue Star.

"How in the hell did you let Conscience take one of your swords?" he asked incredulously.

"What? I wasn't paying attention," Blue Star defended. James, who overheard, Flashed behind him and smacked him upside the head.

Blue Star sighed in annoyance.

[Ending Song]

Author's Note

As he fell forward onto the ground, Atario spoke up. "I thought you had to EX EX Super Jump to kick that hard."

That explanation will come later, when he actually does it. *shoots self in the head*

"I got an invitation? (O_O) ...You're joking!"

Mr. Original’s Dictionary
Original Edition

Hand Crack
/hand krak/
vb.

-when one balls up their fist(s) so hard that they crack multiple times

[Theme Song]

"The Grand Galloping Gala!" Twilight and Applejack hopped up and down in excitement.

Arthur leaned towards James. "Did they just repeat the--"

"Yes. Yes the did," James answered before he could finish.

Atario looked at Spike, who had a deadpan look on his face. "What's the matter with him?" Atario asked in confusion as he pointed at him.

James looked at Spike. "...Maybe they're annoying him?" he guessed. "I mean, I never thought him to be one to get annoyed at this sort of thing. Even I'm not annoyed by it, so I'm sure it's something else." They watched as he did a gagging gesture before he belched out a green flame once again. The smoke materialized into two golden tickets.

"Look, two tickets!" Spike held said tickets in the air.

"Wow, great!" Twilight replied. At that point, Arthur broke into song.

[♪'Cause she's got two golden ti-ckets

♪...♪

She's got a golden chance, to make her way...

And with some golden ti-ckets it's a gol-den, daaaaay♪](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TW_xGlL1XOc&feature=youtu.be&t=99)

This time, all the guys (except Spike) collapsed on the ground laughing, even James and Arthur.

"I've never been to the Gala. Have you, Spike?"

"No. And I plan to keep it that way. I don't want any of that girly, frilly, frou-frou nonsense," Spike waved dismissively.

"Aw, come on, Spike. A dance would be nice."

"'Nice?' It's a heap good more than just nice! I'd love to go," Applejack put her hoof to her chin in thought. "Land sakes... if Ah had an apple stand set up, ponies would be chowin' our tasty vittles 'til the cows came home. Do you have any idea how much business Ah could drum up for Sweet Apple Acres? Why, with all that money, we could do a heap of fixin' up 'round here. We could replace that saggy old roof. And Big Macintosh could replace that saggy old plow. And Granny Smith could replace that saggy old hip!" she looked thoughtfully at the sky. "Why, Ah'd give my left hind leg to go to that gala."

James's eyes widened. "Well, damn, the roof doesn't look that bad," he looked at the top of the barn.

"Well then, would you like to--"

"WHOA!"

CRASH!

Twilight didn't get to finish as suddenly something fell from above and landed on top of them. Or more accurately somepony.

"Are we talking about the Grand Galloping Gala?" Rainbow Dash asked excitedly from on top of Applejack and Twilight.

"Rainbow Dash," Applejack narrowed her eyes at her. "You told me you were too busy to harvest Apples. What were you busy doin'? Spyin'?"

"No. I was busy... napping," Rainbow replied nonchalantly. "And I happened to hear you have an extra ticket?" She smiled expectantly at Twilight while she hovered upside down in her face.

"Yeah, but--"

"YES! This is so awesome!" Rainbow did a flip in the air. "The Wonderbolts perform at the Grand Galloping Gala every year. I can see it now," she said as she looked distantly at the sky. "Everyone would be watching the sky, their eyes riveted on the Wonderbolts. But then, in would fly... Rainbow Dash! I would draw their attention with my Super Speed Strut. Then, I would mesmerize 'em with my Fantastic Filly Flash. And for my grand finale, the Buccaneer Blaze! The ponies would go wild! The Wonderbolts would insist that my signature moves be incorporated into their routine, and then welcome me as their newest member.

"Don't you see, Twilight? This could be my one chance to show 'em my stuff," she struck a pose in mid-air. "You gotta take me!"

Before Twilight could respond, she was pulled back by the tail. The culprit? None other than Applejack.

"Hold on just one pony pickin' minute here," she spat out Rainbow's tail. "Ah asked for that ticket first," she sized her up.

KLPOW!

There was James right behind them. "Plus...," he held up his index. "Twilight was in the middle of offering Applejack the ticket, before she was ever-so rudely interrupted," he furrowed his eyebrows.

"So? That doesn't mean you own it," Rainbow got in Applejack's face.

"Oh, yeah? Well, I challenge you to a hoof-wrestle. Winner, gets the ticket." They ran over to a conveniently located tree stump and held hooves before they started. They barely wrestled for three seconds before Twilight separated them.

"Girls, these are my tickets. I'll decide who gets it, thank you very much. Whoever has the best reason to go should get the ticket, don't you think?"

Applejack stepped forward. "Drummin' up business for the farm?"

"A chance to audition for the Wonderbolts?" Rainbow stepped in front of her.

"Money t' fix Granny's hip."

"Living, the dream!"

Arthur held up his index. "I'd say Applejack's reasons sound more important." Red X, Atario, Stario, and Conscience muttered in agreement.

"...And I'm okay with this!" James Epic Shrugged.

"I vote Rainbow Dash," Blue Star spoke up. He wilted, however, when the guys all glared at him.

"Oh my, those were all pretty good reasons, aren't they?" Twilight smiled nervously, in which Conscience wildly gestured at Applejack in outrage. Just then, Twilight's stomach growled, causing her to laugh nervously.

"Listen to that. I am starving. I don't know about you, but I can't make important decisions on an empty stomach. So, I'll, uh, think about it over lunch and get back to you two, okay?" she said as she walked away, Spike on her back. Arthur, Stario, and Atario followed them. Conscience merged with James before he Flashed to catch up.

"Okay," Applejack and Rainbow frowned and looked at the ground. Almost instantly they glared at each other before resuming their hoof-wrestle.

"Applejack! Applejack! Applejack!" Red X chanted.

"Rainbow Dash! Rainbow Dash! Rainbow Dash!" Blue Star cheered.

"So who are you gonna give the ticket to, Twilight?" Spike asked as the six of them walked down the town road.

"I don't know Spike, but I really can't think straight when I'm hungry," she frowned. "So where should we eat?"

No sooner did she ask that did a pink blur abruptly shoot out of a nearby door and tackle her and Spike to the ground. Atario, Arthur, and Stario looked perplexed and on edge at the sudden incident. James, however, was nothing but exasperated.

"Goodness damn it, Pinkie Pie!" he Facewhipped.

As the ticket floated down on top of the pink, now-still pony's muzzle, she opened her eyes to see what it was. Upon seeing it, she shrieked. "Aaah! Bats on my face! Help! Wait," she abruptly paused and looked closer. "These aren't... tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala!? It's the most amazing incredible tremendous super-fun wonderful terrifically humongous party in all of Equestria! I've always always always wanted to go!"

"...What!?" Stario exclaimed, completely lost.

"Don't look at me," Arthur raised an eyebrow.

Pinkie then broke into a song.

"Oh the Grand Galloping Gala is the best place for me..."

"...Aw, hell no," James pulled out a pistol and shot himself in the head.

[One random song later...]

"Oh thank you, Twilight. It's the most wonderful-est gift ever," she bounced around before smiling wide, right in Twilight's face.

*BOOM!*

James, whose Song Senses alerted him awake a few seconds ago, had Explosively appeared in front of Pinkie.

Arthur's other eyebrow rose as James suddenly yelled, "DAMN IT, SHE DIDN'T EVEN GI--!"

He was cut off by a prolonged gasp. He turned around furiously. "Are these what I think they are?" the source of the voice came from Rarity (who appeared out of nowhere).

Twilight stammered, "Uh--"

"Yes, yes, yes!" Pinkie bounced, cutting her off. "Twilight's taking me to the Grand Galloping Gala in Canterlot!"

"The gala? I design ensembles for the gala every year, but I've never had the opportunity to attend. Oh, the society, the culture, the glamour!" Rarity gushed.

Arthur leaned towards James. "Do you know who this is?"

"Her name's Rarity," James sighed.

"Is she always like this?" Atario asked.

"Yep," James deadpanned in reply without missing a beat.

"It's where I truly belong, and where I'm destined to meet, him!" Rarity's eye twinkled.

"Him!" Pinkie parroted, before she realized she didn't know who she was talking about. "...Who?"

"Him," Rarity repeated. "I would stroll through the gala, and everyone would wonder... 'Who is that mysterious mare?' They would never guess, that I was just a simple pony from little old Ponyville..."

"I can't take much more of this," James muttered, pulling out a silencer and shooting himself in the head.

[One dramatic fantasy later...]

"Twilight, I simply cannot believe you would invite Pinkie Pie so she can... party, and prevent me from meeting my true love. How could you? Hmph."

James abruptly shot up and shouted. "SHE DIDN'T F***ING INVITE ANYONE YET, DAMN IT!!!" Everyone stared at him in shock as his breaths became long and rugged.

Hesitantly, Arthur spoke up. "James... I think you have an anger problem..."

"Tell me something I don't know," James Hand Cracked his right fist. Suddenly, a bunny scurried towards Spike, who was looking the other way.

"Hey!" Spike exclaimed as the bunny ran away with the tickets. Upon seeing him, James quickly pulled out a silencer and shot him directly in his side, causing him to tumble lifelessly, losing its grip on the tickets.

"F***ing ass****...," James seethed. Said tickets were carried by a very light- but strong enough- breeze, which placed them in the sight of Fluttershy. Upon seeing the floating pieces of paper, she quickly caught them with her hoof.

"Ooh, these are perfect," she smiled as she looked at the tickets.

Meanwhile, Stario gave the bunny a 1-UP Mushroom while James wasn't looking (or Fluttershy). Said bunny looked around in confusion, before his gaze fell on Fluttershy. He ran up to her as she walked towards Twilight and the others.

"Um... excuse me, Twilight. I would just like to ask, I mean, if it would be alright, if you haven't given it to someone else," Fluttershy said timidly.

"You? You want to go to the Gala?" Rarity asked skeptically.

"I mean, f***, is it wrong for her to want to go? Sh**, even she wants to go!" James gestured at Pinkie.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Pinkie narrowed her eyes.

"Don't worry about it," James replied darkly.

Fluttershy hesitated. "Oh... no." The bunny, now holding the tickets, lightly tapped Fluttershy a couple times on her foreleg. "I-I mean, yes. Or actually, kind of.

"You see.... It's not so much the Grand Galloping Gala, as it is the wondrous private gated garden that surrounds the dance. The flowers are said to be the most beautiful and fragrant in all of Equestria! For the night of the gala, and that night alone, would they all be in bloom... and that's just the flora! Don't get me started on the fauna! There's loons and toucans and bitterns, oh my! Hummingbirds that can really hum, and buzzards that can really buzz. White-blue jays, and red jays, and green jays, pink jays and pink flamingos!"

"...Please kill me," James pulled his hat over his face.

"...Is she high?" Stario asked Atario, who just shrugged.

"Gee, Fluttershy, it sounds... beautiful...?" Twilight was rather taken aback at Fluttershy's openness.

"Wait just a minute!" a voice called out. Everyone looked up to see Rainbow Dash standing at the edge of a roof.

"Rainbow Dash! Were you following me?" Twilight accused.

"No. I mean yes. I mean, maybe," Rainbow stuttered. "Look, it doesn't matter. I couldn't risk a goody-four-shoes like you giving that ticket away to just anybody."

"It's not your F***ING DECISION!" James Exploded.

"Wait just another minute," Applejack walked up to the group.

"Applejack," Twilight narrowed her eyes. "Were you following me too?"

"No. Ah was followin', this one to make sure she didn't try any funny business," Applejack pointed at Rainbow. "Still trying to take mah ticket."

"Your ticket?" Rainbow exclaimed.

"But Twilight's taking me!" Pinkie argued.

Twilight put her head in her hooves, lying on the ground as her other five pony friends all drove a heated argument. James might as well have been an atomic bomb, he was so pissed off. This didn't go unnoticed by Arthur, Stario, and Atario, whose eyes were widened in alarm at how angry he was getting. They tensed up as he began to repeatedly Facewhip.

Author's Note

Me: So, there's my family for you!
Conscience: And his anger problem...
Me: Shut up! >=(