Joint Custody

by PRlNCESS CADENCE

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Mayor Mare, Romance, Sex, Human, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 9324

The mayor and Applejack get themselves in a little mishap when Twilight accidentally joins them at the hip just days before a very important election.

Applejack and Mayor Mare have been good friends on and off the stage. They're so close that they're metaphorically joint at the hip, but when Twilight accidentally messes up a new spell of hers, the two end up a lot closer than normal.

With just days left before Mayor Mare has to give her campaign speech, the two need to figure out how to deal with two completely separate lives while balancing their careers in the middle of it all.

Commission for diablo4000

Published 2016-09-09 06:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-25 00:21:10 UTC

Chapter 1

In the most bustling part of town, when the sun was at its highest and everyone was moving from place to place, two women stood in the middle of the crowded town square, handing out fliers to anyone who would read them. Most fliers quickly ended up in a nearby trashcan when the women weren't watching, too polite to be able to openly turn down their message without even giving them a chance. This was, after all, probably going to be the most competitive race that the town had seen in recent years.

It’s not that the town was doing poorly by any means, and besides a small hair-dying scandal, the incumbent mayor hadn't had any mishaps that would have caused the town not to trust her. Instead, it was the emergence of a powerful new candidate, who was catching the eyes of the townspeople left and right. His name was Downstage Trump, and with his fiery words and confident bravado, he would be able to convince people that even the economy was just a fancy way of saying donuts (which definitely helped out Donut Joe’s sales).

To put things bluntly, if the mayor didn't convince people fast that she was right and he was wrong, she was about to be unemployed.

“Vote for Mare for Mayor!” the girl with a cowboy hat said, holding out a flier to a man who simply avoided eye contact and marched forward without acknowledging their existence. “Y’all have a good day now. Vote for Mare for Mayor! Howdy! Be sure to vote for Mare for Mayor!”

“I think that’s enough for now,” the older woman said, gently placing a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “It looks like everyone’s lunch break is almost over. You have a lot of work to do over at the farm, don't you? Why don't you get back to that? I can take care of the rest of these fliers tonight during rush hour.”

“Aw, shoot. You know I’ll be down to help as soon as I’m done. Why don't y’all come down to the farm and have somethin’ to drink before goin’ back to your campaign speech? I can even take a break to listen to it if you’d like.”

The mayor dropped her shoulders, releasing all the tension in her neck and sighed loudly, pressing her fingers to her temples. “You know I don't mean to be a burden, Applejack.”

“Aww, shoot. You know I’d do anything to help with your campaign.”

“I know, and I really appreciate that. I’m just so overwhelmed with everything that’s been going on lately that I--”

The mayor’s words were abruptly cut short by Applejack’s fingers pressing against her lips. “Come on. Let’s grab you some cider, and I don't wanna hear no down talk about this election. You’re gonna do fine!”

As much as the mayor wanted to interject Applejack’s kind offer, she knew that her mind would probably explode if she didn't have her best friend by her side in the meantime. In fact, the two of them were hardly ever apart since Applejack first volunteered to enter the political scene.

The blonde-haired cowgirl wasn't too far into the political scene (besides being an advisor to the princess of friendship), but she had known Mayor Mare since practically the debut of her time in office. If anyone knew what a trustworthy, honest and just woman she was, it was Applejack, and she’d stick by her side no matter what kind of rhetoric Trump used to get on top. After all, under Mayor Mare’s term, the country faced turmoil after turmoil, but Ponyville had always managed to survive, recover and press on, no matter what challenges behooved them.

The election itself was going to go right down to the wire, and the two of them had only four days before the Mayor was to give her campaign speech and only three days after that until the physical election. Needless to say, at this point it didn't even matter if her hair was naturally gray or not; the stress itself was enough to take care of it for her.

Once the two made it back to the farm together, they made no delay in quickly going to the fridge, popping open a bottle of cider and finding a nice quiet place in the yard to sit down and relax. The mayor then checked her watch, making sure to gauge even her relaxation time to make every second count.

“Can't ya put that thing away for five minutes?” Applejack asked with a smile, sticking her gardening hoe into the ground and leaning forward on top of it.

“But then how would I know when it’s been five minutes?” Applejack didn't know whether she was joking or the stress had gotten to her that much, but either way, she couldn't help but laugh at how silly the Mayor was acting.

“Ya know, I can't tell ya a thing or two about politics, but after workin’ on a farm my whole life, I can tell you a thing or two about managing your time. If you let it stress you too much,” Applejack placed her palm over the watch, blocking the time from her view, “you won’t get anything done on time. Sometimes ya just gotta do what ya can and forget about the rest. I mean, what’s the point of takin’ a break if you’re just as stressed going into work as you were before?”

“So, you mean I should take less breaks?” Applejack, smiling still wider, threw her hat onto the Mayor’s face. “What was that for?”

“How long did it take for you to get my hat out of your face?”

“Umm… two seconds?”

“Really? Because I thought it was three.”

“Does it make a difference?”

Just then, everything clicked in the Mayor’s head, and Applejack, grabbing her hat, putting it back onto her own head and winking, said, “Nope.” Then with that, she left the Mayor to go plow in her gardens.

The clock struck five o’clock, and with a chime from the clock tower and the sun low in the sky, people began to file out of their businesses and pass through town square once again. In the middle of it all, once again, were the two women, each with an armful of fliers with the slogan “Vote for Mare for Mayor!” As they expected, however, most people just lifted up their hands without making eye contact and continued on their way home. Nobody seemed to care much about listening to someone’s political opinions as they were trying to come home from a day of work, but then again, nobody seemed to ever want to listen at all. As much as the Mayor didn't want to admit it, she knew she didn't have nearly the same amount of energy or charisma that Downstage Trump had.

Then, finally breaking the chain of uninterested passersby, one man finally made eye contact with the Mayor and swiftly made his way towards her. “H-hello!” she stammered. “Are you looking to vote in this next election?”

“Yes, but I have some questions to ask you first,” he said with a not-so-friendly twinge in his eye. “What are your thoughts on the current immigration policy held by Ponyville?”

“W-well, I believe that anybody who wants to enjoy life in Ponyville is entitled to do so, regardless of their background.”

“And what about regular people like me, huh?!” His tone quickly shifted into an angry roar, staring her in the eye to where Applejack was seconds from stepping between them. The Mayor, though, held her campaign posters tighter and shivered. “You have no idea what you’re doing to our economy! Do you know who founded Ponyville? Manual laborers like me. They couldn't use magic. They didn't have wings. Yet somehow, they did just fine. What you’re doing, is allowing people with a genetic upper hand to outcompete us for job opportunities. Do you think someone would rather hire someone who’s good with their hands or someone who can just cast a spell and make it go twice as quick? The founders never wanted this!”

“My granny is one of those founders,” Applejack said, stepping in between the man and the mayor, “and she’d be pretty upset if we kicked someone out of this town on account of them havin’ wings or bein’ able to cast spells.”

The angry man snarled and backed away. “You don't know what you’re doing! Trump stands with us, and he’ll be sure to get my vote next week! Figure out whose side you’re on, laborer!”

“I already know whose side I’m on, and I’m gonna stand with the Mayor!” But the man had already walked away and was out of earshot. “I’m sorry you had to hear that. Some people just don't--”

Applejack’s words were cut short once she turned her head and saw the gray-haired woman, sobbing silently with shaking shoulders. “I’ve never been under so much stress in my life,” she said, followed by a huge breath in between sobs. “I don't know of I’ll be able to do this!”

“Aww, sure you will.” Applejack placed a comforting arm around her shoulder. “You know, maybe we’ve handed out enough fliers for one day. Let’s go work on your campaign speech some more.”

Unable to speak through her tears, the Mayor weakly nodded and began walking with Applejack back to her office.

***

“So, uh… Why again do we have to do this outside?”

Standing outside Twilight’s castle were two of her winged friends, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash, who had just spoken, tilted her head in confusion with a hand on her hip while Fluttershy, standing next to her, shivered in place.

“Because this spell is extremely unstable,” Twilight replied with a spell book in her hand. “If something got in the way, it would probably bounce this way, that way and the other until it found two matching partners. For this to work, I’ll need a clear shot.”

“Please don't describe it that way,” Fluttershy said softly, hiding behind her long pink hair.

“Aaaand why did you pick the both of us for this?” Rainbow asked in unamusement.

“Because I need two partners who are a biological match.” Rainbow Dash unenthusiastically shifted her gaze to Fluttershy, then to Twilight, then back to Fluttershy, then back to Twilight.

“Yeeeeeahhhh, I don't know about that.”

“Well, you two are the most compatible subjects I could find, so--”

“I--I’m a s-s-subject?” Fluttershy asked, wobbling in her knees.

“No! Let me rephrase that. You're a science experiment!... Oh, boy… I’m not very good at this am I?”

“Not in particular. So what is this spell supposed to do, anyway?”

“Oh! I’m glad you asked. This spell is designed to temporarily merge your strengths into one!”

“Soooo, basically giving Fluttershy all my awesome talents?”

“And transferring some of Fluttershy’s talents over to you, yes.”

Rainbow Dash blew a raspberry. “Come on, Twilight. It’s not like I’m looking to talk to animals or anything.”

“You could pet a bear.” Suddenly, both Twilight and Rainbow Dash turned their heads toward Fluttershy, who had one hand in the air like she was asking for permission to speak, but then quickly pulled it back to her chest. “Nevermind. You probably don't want to pet a bear.”

“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said before turning her head back to Twilight. “Could you just zap us already and get it over with? I’m getting antsy.”

“Alright. Here it goes!”

Twilight’s hands then began to glow a bright purple as a circle of light engulfed her, lifting her into the air and flipping the pages in a gust of wind until it landed on the exact page she needed. Then, the words began to peel off of the page and float in midair before her, increasing the velocity of the winds surrounding her. With her hands outstretched, a purple ball of magical energy formed in her palms, spinning in circles and growing larger until it shot out of Twilight’s hand and towards to two winged girls.

Fluttershy cowered in fear while Rainbow Dash braced for impact, but just as the orb was feet away from them, Fluttershy reflexively fell to the ground, covering her head in cowardice.

“No!” Twilight shouted, dropping the book to the ground and falling onto her knees. All three girls looked back to see where the ball had gone, but by this point, it was already lost in the distance. Twilight bit on her nails, looking on with anxiety and hoping the energy sphere would just dissipate with no clear target. Knowing Twilight’s case, though, she was never that lucky.

“Well, this has been fun and all,” Rainbow Dash said, putting her hands into her pockets, “but I think we should probably get going before we get busted for breaking someone’s window.”

“Sorry, Twilight,” Fluttershy mumbled with her head hung low, slowly getting back to her feet.

“It’s OK! It’s fine. What’s the worst that could happen, right?”

***

The Mayor leaned forward on her desk with one hand while resting her face in the other, dropping all of her campaign fliers onto the ground and trying her hardest not to burst back into tears. Applejack, coming up from behind, then placed her hand onto the Mayor’s shoulder, allowing her to release her stress in silence for the next several moments.

“10 years, Applejack. I’ve held together this city for the past 10 years, and until now, nobody has had a problem with it.”

“And they still don't!”

“Applejack, I’ve seen the polls! I know exactly what this city thinks of me. I’m old news, a has-been, an old hag! They want something new, something that I can't give them! All I have is my experience!”

“And they’d be crazy to vote any other way.” Applejack then brought her arms around the Mayor’s waist and embraced her in a warm, tight hug. “You can't talk sense into people who won't listen, so all you can do is your best. You sure won't get anywhere by bein’ someone you’re not, so… could you try just havin’ a little bit of faith in yourself? For me?”

The mayor blushed. Surely Applejack was just saying whatever she could to cheer her up, but the warm feeling she gave her waist was nothing compared to the warmth she was feeling inside her chest. The gray-haired woman then wrapped her own arms around Applejack’s, hoping that she would never have to let go, no matter how ridiculous it seemed.

Then, without warning, a purple orb shot through her window and began ricocheting off of every solid object in the office. It bounced off of her bookshelf, her lamp, her desk and just barely grazed past both of their ears. The two women held onto each other tighter, hoping that it would bounce back out the window or stop some other way, but the one thing they were hoping wouldn't happen just happened to be the most likely occurrence.

After bouncing off of the office door, the sphere shot parallel with the ground and hit Applejack square in the back, passing through her body and making its final voyage into the Mayor’s. The two then began to hover a few feet from the ground while a large purple light shone from both of their chests, engulfing them both completely in an overpowering brilliance until they both found themselves back on the ground with their heads spinning.

“Ugh… what in the hay was that?”

“I’m not sure. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I reckon so. Could… you let go of my arm, though?”

“What do you mean? And although I appreciate the concern, I’d prefer it if you didn't lean so hard on my hip!”

“Say what now?”

The two of them looked down.

Then they screamed.

Then they looked at each other.

Then they screamed again.

Then they tried as hard as they could to pull themselves away from each other, but like glue, they were stuck. Actually, glue would be an understatement. The two women had apparently been joint at the hip with their sides completely merged together, leaving the two with three legs, an arm at each side and their necks much closer than they felt comfortable with. Then again, nothing about this situation was comfortable in the least.

After trying to pull away some more, however, the two gave up, leaning onto the Mayor’s desk with both hands and gasping for breath from both the exercise as well as to calm their rapidly beating hearts.

“I don't understand,” Mayor Mare spoke up. “What was that? What happened to us?”

“I dunno, but I think I know a specific princess that might know a thing or two about what got us into this mess.”

Both of their eyebrows furrowed. ““TWILIGHT!””

*knock, knock, knock*

“U-um… Who is it?” called the voice behind the marble door.

“Just some friends who would like to have a word with you,” the Mayor said in a tone that hid her frustration.

“R-really? Because I wasn't expecting company this late at--”

“Twilight, will you open this door already?!” Applejack barked.

Without making any more excuses, the door began to open, revealing a timid, purple-haired girl standing behind it, and to their surprise, she didn't look the least bit surprised. “C-come in, girls. I’ve been expecting you.”

Twilight then led the way inside with the two (or rather one and a half) women three-legged wobbling their way into Twilight’s library, trying their best not to strangle her before she could undo the spell. As they arrived at the most spacious room in the castle, Twilight motioned for them to take a seat, which created a new problem seeing as how none of the chairs in the castle were designed to fit two butts at once.

“I think I might have an idea why you’re here,” Twilight mumbled, avoiding eye contact and toying with her bangs.

“Really?” Applejack said sarcastically. “Twilight might have an idea as to why we’d be here. Can ya reckon that? 'Cause I sure can't. More importantly, do you have any idea how to change us back?!”

“I’m really sorry, girls. You see, I was testing out an experiment, then Fluttershy ducked, and I was hoping the spell wouldn’t--”

“Twilight,” the Mayor said calmly, putting up her right hand. “We understand. You had a spell that went wrong. It’s not like this is the first time we’ve seen this before. What matters right now is how we fix it before anyone else sees us like this.”

Twilight fidgeted in her seat. “I’m guessing you got some looks on the way here?”

“Everybody was lookin’ at us!” Applejack exclaimed. “Heck, one guy even tried cat-callin’ us! Said he should bring us home and have a threew--”

“Anyway,” the Mayor interrupted before Applejack could make the situation any worse. “We’d really like to be changed back now.”

Twilight inhaled awkwardly, making the two girls’ hearts fall into their one stomach. “Change you back? Yeah… You see… About that…”

“Ya can't do it, can ya?”

“...Would you girls like some tea?”

“TWILIGHT!” the Mayor snapped, losing her last shred of patience. “This is your responsibility! You put us into this mess, and there is no excuse for you to not be able to change us back, especially since we both have careers that are detrimental to the functionality of Ponyville!”

“Don't worry! You’ll change back! The spell is temporary! I may not be able to change you back now, but the spell should still wear off on its own.”

“Uh-huh,” Applejack chimed in, again sarcastically, “and just how long before this spell wears off?”

Twilight bit down on her lip, tracing circles in the floor with her feet. “A-about a week.”

The Mayor dropped her head into her palm, rubbing her pounding temples to soothe the pain. “I knew it. I have a speech in four days, actually closer to three now! You’re telling me that I’m going to have to walk onto that stage without the left half of my body?”

“...Yeah…” Twilight hung her head defeatedly. “That’s what I’m saying…”

“Well,” Applejack spoke up in a much more cheerful tone than before, “sometimes you gotta do what you can do with what you’ve got. Ain't no use stressin’ about it now, is there?”

“I can find plenty of reasons to stress out about it! I have an election in one week!”

“That’s not what I said, though. I’m askin’ what good stressin’ will do to help out our situation.” The Mayor wanted to complain some more, but knowing that it would just cause trouble, she kept her mouth shut. “Now, how 'bout we head on over to my place, grab some dinner with the family and figure out where to go from there?”

The Mayor, still stressed out of her mind, clenched her hand on her knee, took in a deep breath and exhaled all the jittery nerves that she could. “You know what? Maybe we should. I think that’s a good idea.”

“Applejack, this was the worst idea you’ve ever had.”

As the two women sat at the dinner table, using two chairs to support the both of them, the Apple family laughed hysterically, poking fun at the two of them while they ate in frustration.

“Hold on!” Applebloom projected to her family. “I’ve got another one! These two have been through worse, haven't they? But no matter how bad things got, they always stuck together!” Big Mac and Granny Smith then joined Applebloom as she erupted with laughter, holding onto her sides in her fit of humorous hysteria.

The one and a half women, though, dug their forks into their mashed potatoes, shakily trying to angle it into their mouths but failing over and over again. “Dang it!” Applejack exclaimed. “I can deal with the family pokin’ fun at us, but how'm I supposed to eat with my left hand when I’m right-handed?”

“And I’m left-handed,” Mayor Mare said, dropping her head in despair. “No use stressing over this either, I’m guessing?”

Applejack put her hand to her chin, trying to come up with an idea. “How 'bout this? Maybe it’ll be easier for me tryin’ to feed you and you tryin’ to feed me?”

“Great idea, Applejack!” Applebloom exclaimed. “I always knew that two heads were better than one!” Again, laughter filled the room while the one and a half women attempted their feeding plan.

“You two’ll hold up alright,” Granny Smith chimed in. “After all, I always thought y’all two was closer than kin! Inn't that right, Big Mac?”

“Eeyup!”

Putting their forks down, the Mayor and Applejack scooted their chairs back and stood up angrily. “I think we’ve heard enough for one night,” Applejack said. “Come on, Mayor. Let’s get ready for bed.”

“I agree. Thank you for the food, but not so much the commentary.”

The women then attempted to three-legged walk their way up the stairs, holding onto the handrail for dear life as they made their way to the top of the staircase. Upon seeing Applejack’s bedroom, the Mayor turned to the right, but for some reason, Applejack was pulling in the opposite direction.

“Umm… Applejack? You know your room is this way, right?”

“Well ya can't expect me to go to bed without takin’ a bath first, can ya?”

“A b-b-b-bath? You mean… with the two of us?”

“Unless you can think of some other way, I don't think there’s anythin’ we can do about it.”

The Mayor gulped with sweat dripping down her face, but if they were going to be stuck like this for the next week, baths as well as trips to the restroom were going to be unavoidable. The two then walked into the bathroom, closed the door behind them and switched on the hot water, watching the water fill the tub as the steam began to rise. Without another thought, Applejack reached for the bottom of her shirt and began tugging it upwards, struggling her way to get her arm out of the hole before the Mayor realized that she should be helping too.

With a large breath, the two girls were finally able to pop the shirt off of their head, but their bra would be a completely new obstacle. The two of them then reached behind their back, none of them either sure just where the latches were supposed to be until Applejack found a spot where the two half-bras met. “Found it!” she declared, moving it around to where the Mayor would be able to help release the other side.

“This is going to be a nightmare getting these back on, won't it?”

“Like I said, don't worry 'bout things you’ve got no control over.” Finally, the fabric unlatched and fell to the floor, giving each woman a clear view of the other’s breast. Suddenly, the reason why it had been so hard to get their top off became painstakingly clear, as their breasts had seemingly merged with each other's, making their boobs twice their normal size. Looking down, they found a similar problem: their waist had slendered down, making their hips stretch wide and their butt pop out about as far as their chest. Then, looking back up at each other with red faces, Applejack continued, “H-here. The bottom part should be easier.”

With two zippers in the pants, all the two of them needed to do was unzip their own side and shimmy their jeans/slacks combo down their three legs, which, given all they’d been through that day, was the easy part. Once their pants were on the floor, though, the two ladies stopped for a moment before revealing their most private area, grabbing onto their panty/thong combo with shaky fingers. Applejack, however, knew that she was going to have to get used to it eventually and led the way, sliding the fabric down their legs.

The women tried not to look at each other’s areas, but the curiosity was something they knew they would end up justifying at some point anyway. Applejack kept her bush natural, whereas the Mayor kept hers neatly trimmed. The sight of both of their genitalia caught them by surprise, but coming back to reality, Applejack quickly turned the faucet off before the tub got to the point where it would overflow once they set foot inside.

“Well,” Applejack said, breaking the silence, “I guess we’d better get in.”

“Hmm? Oh! Right! It would be pointless for us to get this far and not go all the way.”

“Pardon?”

“Why don't I go first!”

Awkwardly, the Mayor lifted her leg over the tub, dipped her toe in to gauge the heat of the water and leisurely descended the rest of her foot into bath with Applejack following close behind. They then both sunk in as far as they could, still not too sure how comfortable they felt with the other staring at their breasts. With the water up to their necks, Applejack let out a sigh.

“A whole week, huh? Well, I could think of worse.”

“I can’t…”

“Really? You think bein’ with me for that long is gonna be that bad?”

“Well, it’s not that. It’s just… Who would vote for a woman with three legs… or two heads?!”

“Ones who know who you are on the inside… and preferably ones that know Twilight.”

“...I suppose…”

“Hey, you’re lettin’ it get you down too much! Let’s go out there and be the first two-headed Mayor Ponyville’s ever seen! I’ll tell ya what. How 'bout we spend the first three days workin’ on your reelection? Then after your speech, we can see what we can do back here at the farm. Does that… work OK with you?”

A long pause filled the air before Mayor Mare felt comfortable enough replying. “Well, it’s not the most preferable thing in the world, but I guess I can't complain.”

As much as Applejack wanted to cheer her up, when she looked at the Mayor’s face, she displayed nothing but despair and a lack of hope for her future. After wading her hand in the water, however, an idea crept up in Applejack’s head as to how she could help. Lifting her hand halfway out of the surface, she squeezed her hand, squirting water right in the Mayor’s face.

“What was that for?”

“What was what for?” Applejack replied with a smile. “Don't tell me you’re seein’ things!”

“You just splashed water on my face!”

“Water? Like this?” The blonde cowgirl then cupped a handful of water and squeezed it back into the Mayor’s face.

The gray-haired woman then wiped as much of the water off of her face as she could. “Yes! Like that!”

“Sorry. Don't know what you're takin' 'bout.”

“Oh, you asked for it!”

The mayor then splashed a tidal wave into Applejack’s face in retaliation, but with her arm already lifted to protect herself from the onslaught of water, she slammed her hand against the surface of the tub, soaking them both. Almost instantly, the two found themselves in an all-out splashing war, filling the room with the sounds of water and laughter, and the first time either of them had laughed all day.

Chapter 2

“Look at this, Applejack!” the Mayor said, holding up her newspaper to Applejack’s face. “The new polls show that Trump is ahead by eight points! Do you have any idea how hard it is to recover from an eight point loss just six days prior to an election?!”

“Will you cut that out?” Applejack snapped, slapping the paper away from her face. “I don't think the breakfast table is the best place to talk about politics first thing in the mornin’, especially with how bad I slept last night.”

The two women sat down at the breakfast table along with Applejack’s family, doing their best to eat their pancakes, even though it was practically impossible to do without feeding each other. The night prior had been miserable as well, at least for Applejack. The Mayor, however, cuddled up with the farm girl like a teddy bear, giving her one of the best nights sleep she’d ever had and causing Applejack the worst sleep she could remember.

“Look,” Applejack continued, “I don't think breakfast is gonna work unless we help each other out a little, and that can't happen unless you put down that newspaper for five minutes!”

The Mayor sighed, laying down the newspaper on the table and picking up a fork to help Applejack cut their pancakes. Applejack made everything sound so simple, like as long as they ate their pancakes, everything would turn out alright, but from what the Mayor had been reading, nothing was turning out alright at all.

“Now, I think it'd be best to make an action plan,” Applejack said, feeding some pancake into Mayor Mare’s mouth. “First off, I think we should go check on Twilight and see if she’s found out anything new. If she hasn't, we’ll probably need to go see Rarity and get us an outfit for your speech. Then--Mayor, are you OK?”

At the thought of having to walk onstage in a suit made for one and a half women, the Mayor began choking on her breakfast, coughing out as much as she could while her eyes burned with tears. “Yes,” she said between coughs. “What else do we have on our schedule for today?”

“Well, besides just doin’ the regular campaignin’, I can't really think of anything else.”

“Very well. Shall we get going, then?”

“Uhh, ain't you forgettin’ about somethin’?”

The Mayor turned her head to see what Applejack was talking about, but just saw a woman with her mouth wide open like a baby waiting for that spoon to be put in her mouth. As much as the Mayor wanted to bury her face into her hand, though, she only had one, and it was busy trying to angle its way into Applejack’s mouth.

“I’m sorry, girls, but I just haven’t been able to find anything that will help undo the spell any quicker. I did come across one such separation spell, but I’m not sure that’s something you’d be all too interested in.”

“And why’s that?” Applejack asked.

“Because it would essentially just tear you in half.” The women then grabbed each other around the waist and shivered at the thought of becoming the main characters of some horror novel. “Yeah, I thought you might react like that. Have you thought of what you're going to do about your campaign yet?”

“Why would we change anything?” Applejack remarked. “Our whole platform is that we’re just gonna be ourselves. Can't really do much more than that, can we?”

“I guess not. Mayor Mare, how are you taking this?”

“Being a politician is all about overcoming adversity. It’s not like I’d be proving anyone wrong if I just dropped out of the race.”

“Is that why you’re running, just to prove Trump wrong?”

The Mayor took a half-step back, trying to push back any offense she had inadvertently taken. “I beg your pardon?”

“I’m sorry. I hope that didn't come off as rude at all. I just can't wrap my head around why you’re even doing this if you hate it so much.”

“Well… It’s just the election! After that--”

“Nothing will be better. I think we both know that once we’ve taken on that kind of responsibility, it just gets harder. The campaign is just the job interview, and once you actually get the job, then the real pressure is on. You know that more than anybody. I just hope that you’re doing this for all the right reasons.”

“What're you tryin'a say, Twilight?” Applejack butted in. “You think the Mayor here just wants into office for petty reasons like showin’ up Trump?”

“I have no idea, Applejack. That’s something she has to figure out on her own.”

A long silence filled the room as Applejack stared Twilight down in frustration. “Come on, Mayor! We’ve got places we need to be.”

Stomping her foot back with enough force to physically twist the Mayor around, Applejack turned around and began walking towards the castle doors. As furious as Applejack was, however, the Mayor could only reflect on Twilight’s words, hoping that she was making the right decision.

The one and a half women stood in place, trying to remain as still as they could while Rarity wrapped her measuring tape around them, nearly snapping it in half as she tried to get their chest size. It was obvious that the purple-haired woman was having frustrations, and seeing as how this was probably the only person in town that would be able to make them an outfit in time, they wanted to do as little as they could to disrupt her work.

“Honestly,” Rarity began, “I must say that although I’m envious of your bust, I can't imagine the pain your back must be going through.”

“It ain't nothin’. To be truthful with ya, the fanny kinda helps balance it out a little.”

Rarity’s face began to grow red in embarrassment, but quickly going back to measuring their proportions, she hid her face in the motion of her work. “Yes, I can imagine that would… erm… provide adequate support. Now, Miss Mayor, what kind of look were you going for again?”

“Anything professional, really. Nothing too flashy or standoffish.”

“Really? I would think that in the biggest moment of your life, you’d want something that really grabbed the attention of the people. Something that shouts, 'Anyone who wears an outfit like this has the confidence to take on any opposition!’”

“BUT I DON'T HAVE THE CONFIDENCE!”

Rarity flinched at the Mayor’s sudden outburst before Applejack placed a calming hand onto her shoulder. “What I think she’s gettin’ at,” Applejack intervened, “is that she’s really lookin’ for somethin’ that shows who she really is: just a regular woman who knows where she’s goin’.”

“I… see… Well, if you’re going for classic professionality, I would recommend going with a bold oak-colored French cuff blazer with deep black slacks that match a pair of stiletto heels.”

“No…” the Mayor responded, looking down at the floor. “Simpler… Like gray.”

Rarity chuckled to bring up the mood, but soon found herself as the only one laughing. “Dear, you can't be serious. In an event like this, and against Trump no less--”

“I think gray sounds fine,” Applejack intervened before Rarity accidentally crushed the Mayor any further. “How 'bout this? Just a regular gray business skirt with a white blouse fit for two heads. Does that sound like somethin’ you’d be able to work with?”

The Mayor nodded her head, still feeling too depressed to think about it any further. Rarity looked back and forth between the two heads, but swallowing her pride as a fashionista, she nodded her head and smiled.

“Don't worry, Miss Mayor. I can give you my Boutique Guarantee that when you stand in front of that crowd, you will feel the prettiest you’ve ever been, gray and all.”

“That sounds great, Rarity,” Applejack said, taking the hint from the Mayor that she really didn't feel like talking anymore. “You have everything you need?”

“Everything and more! Now, I’d better get started right away. Not a moment to lose!”

“Yeah, we’d best get goin’ ourselves. We’ve got some posters to put up, and if we don't get these up soon, there won't be enough time for people to look at 'em. Isn't that right, sugarcube?”

Applejack turned her head to the Mayor, giving her a reassuring grin, but the Mayor, however, still would not smile, would not make eye contact, and would not speak. Taking the hint, Rarity silently waved off her customers and went straight to her designing table to sketch out exactly what they’d asked for, leaving the other two women to quietly walk out the door.

“Whoooowee!” Applejack shouted, slamming open the door to her farm. That day had been excruciating, and even though they had managed to speak to more people than ever before, the whole ordeal of getting them to actually listen to their platform was a grueling experience. “I haven't been this hungry since I accidentally sold my breakfast to someone instead of apple pie. Boy, you shoulda seen the look on their face!”

“Right… Pie…” As the two walked upstairs to AJ’s room, the Mayor kept her eyes glued to their feet, mumbling in the same apathetic tone that she had been using all day.

“Come on, now! What’s gotten into you? You’ve been like this all day. Don't tell me it’s about that thing Twilight was sayin’!”

“I… I guess so…”

“Horse apples! Ya can't let what she said get to you! I’ll tell ya what. Tomorrow we’ll go right back to her castle and give her a piece of our minds. That’ll--”

“She was right…”

The two women had finally made their way into Applejack’s room and found a place to sit down on her bed, and at that moment, all the emotions she had been holding in all day began to drip down her face. Applejack, upon seeing her agonized face, then turned her body as much as she could to wrap her arm around the Mayor in a big hug, squeezing her in a way that she hoped would drain all the tears out of her.

“What’re you goin’ on about now? You sayin’ that there’s someone who can do your job better than you?”

“Applejack, this is politics. There is no way to do a better job than somebody else. Whatever decision you make, it will make some people happy and some people unhappy. What Trump sees is his own version of a perfect society, and even though his decisions will make a lot of people unhappy, who am I to say that my decisions wouldn't do the same?”

“You’re different than him, though!”

“Exactly! He actually believes in what he’s saying! I’m just doing anything I can to keep my job! I really am a crook!”

The Mayor then pressed her hand into her face to shield just how much she was crying, but with her shoulder shaking the both of them every time she sobbed, it became even more painstakingly clear just how much pressure she was under. Then, squeezing harder, a small tear began to drop down Applejack’s face as well, freezing the Mayor entirely.

“Applejack… What’s wrong?”

“Don't you get it? Don't you get why I’ve been tryin’ so hard to make sure you get reelected? It’s because I know you better than anyone, and I wouldn't trust anyone else with the city but you. Then, for you to tell yourself that you’re not fit to lead, it… it breaks my heart, sugarcube! I don't know where this city would be without you… Heck, I don't know what I’d do without you…”

“What are you saying, Applejack?”

“I… I dunno.” Applejack chuckled to push back a sob. “I guess sometimes the words come out without me really knowin’ what to do with 'em.”

Suddenly, Applejack’s eyes opened wide as Mayor Mare slid their cheeks together to place a small kiss on the side of her face. As soon as she realized what she just did, though, she quickly brought her hand to her mouth and looked away in embarrassment.

“I… I’m really happy that I’ve had you as my campaign manager.”

“Heh. Shoot, it wasn't nothin’! Just tryin’ to do my part.”

“Do… your part…”

Suddenly, the wheels in the Mayor’s head began to turn until something clicked and a lightbulb went off in her head.

“DO YOUR PART! THAT’S IT!”

“What is?”

“I know why I’m running in this election! It’s finally all starting to make sense! I know how we can win!”

“Really? How do we do it?”

“You’ll just have to trust me. I promise, Applejack, for you, I’m going to win this election!”

“I don't think so.” Applejack then brought the Mayor in for another tight squeeze. “You’re gonna win this for Ponyville.”

Morning. The day of the speech.

Both the Mayor and Applejack sat at the breakfast table, eating their usual breakfast, feeding each other now with enough fluency to feel where their mouths were without looking. After all, their eyes were busy glued to the morning paper which illustrated exactly what the people of Ponyville wanted to hear most out of the candidates running for mayor: the economy, relations with Canterlot, and most importantly, the big immigration debate that was beginning to spark like wildfire across the town. It was hard to stay calm during this painstaking time, but the even bigger challenge would be ignoring it any more than they had the capacity to do.

With the newspaper laid out on the table, the Mayor looked over the politics section while Applejack focused on the business section, hoping that she was still doing well in comparison to her competitors.

“Dag nab it! With all the things you could eat in Equestria, how is it that yams are ahead of us in sales? Who eats yams?”

“Maybe it’s not that people eat yams,” the Mayor said with a mouthful of oatmeal, “as much as it is their marketing plan.”

“What’re you talkin’ about? We make sure to put our farm’s logo on everything in Ponyville!”

“That’s my point. Everyone in Ponyville already knows who you are. The Yams family puts one advertisement in the paper each Monday morning, which is the paper that most people buy. They do that with the most popular newspaper in every major city south of Yakyakistan. In fact, I think they actually spend less money on advertising.”

“Wait a second, I think you might be onto somethin’. If we cut how much we spent on advertisin’ here and spread out a couple of apple stands around the region, we could actually make a lot of money! We’ve only gotten outside customers through word of mouth, but if we did this, we could open up a whole second farm! Mayor, you’re a genius!”

Applejack then dropped her spoon and swung her arm around the Mayor’s shoulder, squeezing her as tight as she could and planting a big kiss on the cheek. The Mayor began to blush, but as much as she wished she could stay that way, she awkwardly cleared her throat loud enough to get Applejack’s attention. Then, as soon as the farm girl took her mouth off the Mayor’s cheek and saw her uncomfortable face, she followed her eyes to the girl sitting at the table in front of them, burying her face into her arms to shield her laughter.

“And just what’s so funny now, little missy?”

Applebloom then erupted into a laughing fit, cracking up so hard that her lungs were in pain and tears were burning her eyes. “I… I’m sorry,” Applebloom said, wiping away a tear. “It’s just… now you really look like a married couple.”

Applejack slammed her hand against the table, leaning over towards her little sister. “Now hold on a minute!”

“I think it’s kinda sweet,” Granny Smith said with a smile. “You always been workin’ so hard that you ain't never had no time for anybody else. Ever since that there spell’s been put on you, it’s like you’ve finally had someone to take care of you. Ain't that right, Big Mac?”

“Eeyup.”

The Mayor blushed as Applejack stammered to defend her pride. “N-now hold on a minute! I don't want y’all misinterpreting what’s goin’ on here. The Mayor here’s got an election to win, and we’ve got a new business plan to set up. This ain't the time or place to be fillin’ our heads with white dresses and vows and rings.” The more Applejack talked about it, though, the more the Mayor’s cheeks burned red at the thought of having a special someone to be there for her the rest of her life.

“Anywho,” Applejack continued, breaking the Mayor from her daydreams, “I think we best get ready for the big speech. Think you’ll be OK, Mayor?”

Mayor Mare, however, wanted to tell Applejack how as long as she was by her side, she felt like all the stress didn't make sense anymore, but like Applejack said, this was neither the time or the place.

“Yes. I… I think I’ll be fine. Let’s get ready.”

The girls could hear the clamorous applause from their dressing room, only to their dismay, Trump was the one still on stage. They couldn't hear his powerful diction or his impactful promises, but they could hear the energy that he had in his voice, proclaiming to Ponyville how he would make this the greatest town in Equestria, followed by the deafening cheers from the audience.

“Five more minutes, ladies,” said a woman wearing a headset. “Good luck out there… You’re gonna need it.”

The women then leaned onto their changing room dresser, closing their eyes and taking deep breaths the way that Twilight taught them. In just five minutes, they would give the speech that would decide how the Mayor would spend her next ten years, either still in office or looking for work. With one more deep breath, the girls stood up straight, looked into each other’s eyes through their mirror and smiled as confidently as they could.

“This is your time, Mayor. Just like we practiced.”

“Yes… I’ll give it my best.”

“Ya always have.”

The women then walked their way towards the stage just as Trump gave his final remarks, waved to the crowd and made his way off to the other side. As the event host returned to the center to once again greet the crowd and introduce the next contender, the girls held each other's hand, running their thumbs around each other both out of anxiety and comfort. They mentally prepared themselves for the reaction they would no doubt receive upon walking onstage, and for the first time all day, they finally felt calm enough to approach the crowd.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I now present to you, our incumbent nominee, Miss Mayor Mare!”

A loud roar of applause filled the room far more than they expected, but as soon as the two women left the comfort of the curtain and walked onstage, the sound of cheers quickly shifted into astonished gasps. Instead of just the Mayor walking to the podium, there were two women joint at the hip, wearing a white blouse with a gray skirt, three-legged walking their way to center stage. Applejack’s hair was done up in a beehive style while the Mayor kept her normal, old-lady gray hairdo that the people already knew her for. The sudden silence was uncomfortable to say the least, but the two of them prepared for that, and more than anything, they wanted their chance to finally address their city.

“Good afternoon, everyone,” the Mayor said as Applejack looked out with a smile. “I can tell that most of you would like an explanation of what you see, and I have two words for you: spell mishap. For any of you who know Twilight Sparkle, I think you can all agree when I say that we’re never letting her style Applejack’s hair again.”

The crowd laughed quietly at the Mayor’s joke, and with their faces turned to smiles, they were already back on her side.

“Now, if any of you don't know who this lovely young lady to my side is, she has been helping me day and night in this campaign as both my manager and my best friend. However, that isn't all. She is also the granddaughter of one of Ponyville’s founding members, none of which were fliers or magicians. My opponent, Mr. Trump has brought up many points that I feel like many of you can relate to. He isn't promising you the impossible; he’s just illustrating the fears that many of you have, specifically about your employment and the competition you face.”

Several members in the audience folded their arms and nodded their heads, eagerly awaiting Mayor Mare’s response.

“It’s true. The majority of Ponyville residents can't fly or use magic. Both Applejack and I fit that category. We honor our tradition of the manual labor of the founders very seriously, which is evident by our refusal to using any sort of magic during our Winter Wrap Ups. Then, when you apply to those jobs that you need to feed your family, you find that someone with wings or magic can get the job done at twice your pace. I can sense your frustrations, your fears, and your concerns. Despite all this, though, there’s one thing I want you to remember.”

Applejack and Mayor Mare then lifted both of their fists into the air, speaking in unison.

““AS LABORERS, WE ARE STRONG, BUT TOGETHER, WE ARE INVINCIBLE!””

The people's hard stares suddenly turned into confusion as they began to mutter amongst each other quietly.

“It is true,” the Mayor continued, “that you may be outcompeted by someone who can fly or use magic, but it is due to their contributions to this town that we are able to enjoy the prosperity that they bring. Imagine sending a letter and having your recipient receive it the same day thanks to the wings of a flier. Think about all the hospitals and schools that are built in record times thanks to those with the ability to use magic. We all prosper thanks to their talents, and because of them, we can further expand our own talents as well!

“Take Applejack, for example. It doesn't matter how talented the flier or how dexterous the magician. Nobody can manage a farm the way she does, and thanks to the talents of those around her, she can ship her product to far off lands or even to your doorstep before the cider gets warm. Here in Ponyville, we all have talents that nobody else can do! Now follow the lead of Applejack and I. Let’s stick together and DO OUR PARTS!”

Suddenly, the room once again erupted into thunderous applause, the volume of which matched that of Trump himself. As Applejack and Mayor Mare looked into each other’s smiling faces, they nodded at each other and waved to all of the voters who took the time to come out and listen, and just as the two began to walk off the stage, they began to hear a section of the crowd chanting, “Mare for Mayor! Mare for Mayor! Mare for Mayor!”

Three days later. Election day.

“Well, that should be everything.”

Applejack stuck her hoe in the ground and wiped the remaining sweat off of her forehead, but seeing as how she was dripping sweat down her arms, she practically added as much moisture as she wiped away. The Mayor, on the other hand, was leaning against her own gardening hoe, panting for dear life.

“How… do you… do this… every day…?”

“Just with a strong work ethic and a little bit of elbow grease. Thanks for helpin’ out around the farm these past few days, by the way.”

“Well, we had a deal, didn't we?”

“Still, I appreciate what you’ve done 'round here. Why don't we get us some cider and take it easy for the night?”

“Applejack, you read my mind.”

The one and a half women then returned to Applejack’s kitchen, grabbed two cold glasses of cider and found a quiet tree to lay down by on a hill not too far up the ranch. The sun was beginning to set, and for the first time all week, they had nothing left to do but sit back, relax and enjoy the sunset.

Just as soon as they found a comfortable position, however, a familiar face with rainbow-colored hair came flying by at Mach speeds, nearly blowing the hat off of Applejack’s head.

“Rainbow, what’s got you in such a flurry?”

“Are you kidding?! You won! By just one vote! I’d like to think that one vote was me, but I don't know if I can take all the credit.”

“Oh, that’s right,” the Mayor said quietly. “The election was today wasn't it?”

Both Applejack and the Mayor had made a promise between each other not to speak of the election once they had given their speech, and to their pleasant surprise, they had practically forgotten about it completely. Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, had not received the memo, as her jaw dropped in awe.

“Seriously?! You didn't even know?!”

“I’m sorry, Rainbow,” the newly re-elected Mayor replied. “I guess I’ve just had a lot on my mind.” Turning her gaze up to Applejack, the two smiled at each other, communicating with their eyes so that Rainbow Dash wouldn't know what they were thinking.

“Speaking of which, when did you two become separated again, anyway?”

The two women then looked down, noticing for the first time that their bodies were no longer joint together. How long they had been that way, neither could really say for sure, especially seeing as how their arms were still gripping each other close together, as if they had never come apart in the first place.

“Rainbow Dash,” Applejack said, still looking into the Mayor's eyes, “we’re awful thankful for you givin’ us the news, but could we get a little while to celebrate between the two of us?”

“Works for me. Congrats again on getting re-elected!”

The rainbow-haired girl then took off again at supersonic speeds into the clouds, leaving the two to themselves once again.

“Finally,” Applejack said. “I thought she’d never leave.”

Then, as the two smiled back at each other, Applejack lowered her face down to the Mayor’s as she once again got the silly idea of wearing a pretty white dress.