A Compilation of Short MLP Stories

by Snug-Brony

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Sex, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Other, Original Character, Spike, Comedy
Length: 4658

A bunch of stories of the My Little Pony Universe sometimes making little sense, but very funny!

Some stories are just a sentence or two with sometimes abrupt or shocking endings. A couple of longer ones that can have more of an actual story to them, but with the same random comedy. In this there are a heart-warming Applejack Hearth's Warming Eve Story. A Story about Mr. Cakes guy's night out. An Epic Ending showing how the mane 6, Spike, and Rarity's father's mustache spent the next Grand Galloping Gala.
*Only rated mature for Fluttershy's Gala story the rest is more of a Teen rating*
*DON'T TAKE THESE STORY'S TOO SERIOUSLY*

Published 2012-06-25 23:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-25 23:24:02 UTC

Chapter 1

A Compilation of Short MLP Stories

Written by: Snug-Brony

Author’s Notes

Don’t take these stories so seriously they are very dumb so you are warned. If you want a serious story than you can scroll down to “A Very Applejack Hearth’s Warming Eve” or “Fluttershy’s Alternate Gala Story.”

Some stories contain mild violence and sexual activity. Fluttershy’s Gala story contains extreme gore and sexual activity.

I’m also looking for an artist to make a drawing of Regal Masquerade (as seen in “A Very Applejack Hearth’s Warming Eve.”) Or a music artist to make Pinkies rap song (As seen in Pinkie Pie’s Gala story.)

Also a special thanks to my brother and sister (Coopbra and Zebracakes10) for writing some stories when I got lazy. Another thanks to Lykhon http://lykhon.deviantart.com/ for the alternate Fluttershy gala story.

I hope you enjoy these stories and get a couple of laughs a\ot of them and please don’t take them too seriously.

Big Mac’s Big Cock

Big Mac Wooped out his big red cock and Apple Bloom called Scootaloo a Henry.

THE END.

Diamond Tiara’s First Concert

Diamond Tiara wanted to go to a Lynard Skynard concert, but she couldn’t because her mom died.

THE END.

Mr. Cake’s Guy’s Night Out

Mr. Cake wanted a guy’s night out and Mrs. Cake allowed it. He met up with Prince Blue Blood, Big Mac, Thunderlane and Filthy Rich. They all met up at Sugar cube corner. What Carrot Cake didn’t know was that Prince Blueblood was hoping for his very first gay experience. Filthy Rich ate a basket so his anus fell off, so he couldn’t be the one. Thunderlane got AIDs from Mr. Green hooves. Big Mac was jumping one day and went to high and the astronomical rays turned him into Batman.

One does not simply have butt sex with Batman.

“Let’s go get some cider,” Filthy Rich said.

“I agree,” Carrot Cake said.

“I’m Batman,” Big Mac said.

Carrot cake saw prince blue blood look at him like a pedo and he was a little scared. After a few drinks the party really got started. Filthy was in the bathroom trying to find his contact lenses and in doing so he found Full House Season 2 so he blew up. Thunderlane cured his AIDs using Flam’s horn which he cut off. Flim and Flam joined the guys later that night. No one knows where Big Mac went he just disappeared into the night. Prince Blueblood has been trying to make his move Mr. Cake throughout the night, but Carrot wasn’t responding for he was straight.

After they all were completely drunk out of their minds Flim, Flam, Thunderlane, Carrot Cake, Prince Blueblood, and for some reason Gilda were all in a hot tub together. They mostly debated about who would when a fight Ursaring or Poseidon. Flam needed to go to the hospital, but they were all too drunk to drive so they just kinda left him there bleeding in the hot tub unconscious. Thunderlane was wasted. Gilda was killed by Rarity’s father’s mustache. Flim ran away scared and ran into Jerry Springer who ate the mustache, but also ate Flim.

This left Prince Blueblood and Mr. Cake naked (they don’t normally wear clothes) in a hot tub together. Long story short Pound and Pumpkin Cake were born 9 months later.

THE END.

Rainbow Dash Gets a Very Special Somepony

“NO IT IS NOT A GIRL!” Rainbow Dash yelled.

THE END.

Iron Will’s Pants

Iron Will got on his favorite pants to his surprise Angel was in them. She got there by a freak accident when he was at Fluttershy’s house. They ruled all of Equestria together killing all people who can’t pronounce the word specific.

THE END.

Pinkie Pie’s Return Home

Inkie Pie is now a man.

THE END.

Twilight’s New Oven

Twilight got a new oven. She cooked Pee Wee and feed him to Spike as a prank. In return Spike made children for kids. This made Twilight so mad that she yelled at a hat. The hat cried and murdered everyone’s parents.

THE END.

2012; A Derpy Odyssey

As Derpy flew over Equestria he saw something strange Luna wearing a cat sweater. Derpy asked Luna why she is wearing such an ugly sweater then she explained how she was not loved as a child. Her only friend is Rarity’s father’s moustache. This made Derpy so sad that he decided to go to the moon to find Luna’s friends, for Luna had friends on the moon.

Derpy flew higher and higher to eventually she made it to the moon. To her surprise she accidentally went to the sun. She met sun men who did funky dances. Instead of going home like she planned she landed on Uranus (Look behind you.)

THE END.

The Mysterious Mare Do Well Returns

It was a bright and sunny morning and sweetie bell was going to the store to buy lady things for Rarity. Pinkie Pie met up with Sweetie bell and gave her a blank piece of paper. All yeah then something about Mare Do Well.

THE END.

Feather Weight’s Day Off

Feather Weight was very sick because he didn’t take his vitamins, so he didn’t go to school. Or was Featherweight lying, yes. He went to a theme park and thought he would have a great day, but instead he just saw his father who works there. He was pretty mad and all, so he made him ride the dark ride 8 times in a row. Feather Weight really learned his lesson. The school burned down that day there were no survivors.

THE END.

Mayor Mare’s Present

It was a bright and sunny evening and Mayor Mare just got done hiding the nuclear waste conspiracies. To her surprise there was a winter wrapped up box on her desk. She was so excited that she opened it up right away. It contained nothing.

THE END.

Berry Punch goes to AA

“Berry Punch you are good for nothing drunk, and until you can fix that problem you can’t have any more of my carrots,” Carrot Top (Golden Harvest) screamed.

“Well at least fans can decide on what my name is!” Berry Punch responded.

Berry then walked away from the carrot stand. The next day she went to AA to find Cherilee is a raging alcoholic. Berry Punch then decided to have a drinking contest with her. Berry Punch had so much fun that she decided to stay an alcoholic and to drive home. She crashed into Soarin and the car flew to the moon and hit Luna so hard that she became Nightmare Moon.

THE END.

A Very Applejack Hearth’s Warming Eve

I ran down to the store. I have been saving up my bits for a long time now for something very special. I went to the store to get Granny Smith a new walker. Her regular walker is very broken, but they didn’t have the money to get her a new one for the farm is very broken down and sales aren’t the greatest at the time. Granny Smith tells us that this is just a speed bump and one day the farm will be great again. She said that they had rough times back in the day too. She really deserved this present.

Every year Granny Smith will pull together her money to get Applebloom lots of toys. I used to get toys when our parents were still alive, but now Granny will get me and Big Mac something simple that will help the farm in the long run. I realized that about a year after our parent’s death Big Mac told Granny Smith that he didn’t need presents and to give things to me and Applebloom. This really made me look up to Big Mac and because once I was old enough to realize that Big Mac wasn’t getting presents anymore I asked Granny Smith about it and she explained how he told her that he didn’t want presents anymore. At that time I realized that Applebloom deserves to have the kind of Hearth’s Warming Eves that I had as a child, so I told Granny Smith not to get me any presents anymore too. Of course Granny Smith hated the idea of us not having a Hearth’s Warming Eve, so she always made sure to get us something.

In the store I grabbed the fancy walker I’ve been saving up for and put it up on the counter.

“That will be 50 bits,” A snobby unicorn with Flim and Flam’s body type, but with a white coat and blue mane said. He had a Fancy Pants haircut, but with no mustache. He wore a small pair of glasses, and he had the cutie mark of an antique clock.

“What 50 bits last time I was here it was only 40 bits!” I said sternly.

“I have altered the price; pray I don’t alter it further.”

“I recon you must be one of those Canterlot drop outs with your fancy suit and mane an such coming here just to rip off all the pony folk with all yer fancy antiques,”

“You know nothing of my past!” He almost screamed, but tried to keep calm. “My name is Regal Masquerade and yes I do come from Canterlot, but I’m not a drop out. I merely chose to come to Ponyville to bring some style to this redneck of a town.”

“Would it really hurt ya just to give this to me for 40 bits it’s for my grandma who is very special to me and my family,” Applejack pleaded.

“Hmm Applejack is it, your Rarity’s friend right? I make you a deal I let you have it for 40 bits and that nice hat you got there.”

I had this hat ever since I was a little blank flank it’s one of the few things I have left to remember my parents by. No this is Granny Smith she deserves the best.

“Ok I’ll take your deal,” I then traded my hat and 40 bits for the walker. Regal was nice enough (weird for him) to wrap the walker for me.

It was Hearth’s Warming Eve morning and Applebloom started to open all of her toys. Big Mac and I got a combined gift this year a new plow for our fields. I couldn’t wait anymore, so I grabbed the wrapped box with the walker in it.

“Granny Smith I got you a special present this year,” I said while I gave her the box. She opened it up and saw the walker.

“Oh Applejack you didn’t have to,” Granny Smith was so happy her eyes began to tear up.

“I got you something special too,” Granny Smith responded while giving me another present. When I opened up the present I saw my old hat.

“The man said it was just newly sold to him,” Granny smith said while winking.

“I love you Granny Smith!”

THE END.

Rainbow Dash Gets a Very Special Somepony Part 2

“I told you once and I’ll tell again, IT IS NOT A GIRL!” Rainbow Dash Screamed Angrily

THE END.

Sam from the Movie Holes Goes to Ponyville

Sam from Holes didn’t really die he just went to Ponyville. He went to town hall to see that it a had a huge hole in the celling.

“I can fix that,” He told the mayor. After he was done with fixing town hall he saw Hay Fever (the sick pony from The Perfect Stallion song.)

“You’re gonna need some onions for that awful cold you got there,” Sam told him.

Sam lived in Ponyville for a while and falls in love with Cherilee. The same thing happens to him like on the movie they kill him because he is a human. Cherilee then becomes a bandit, but Scootaloo accidentally drops her off a building.

THE END.

Lyra and Bon-Bon First Meet

Lyra jumped off a cliff and then learned that she can fly for she wasn’t Lyra at all rather she was R. Kelly and she believed she could fly. Bon-Bon Found the real Lyra sleeping in the mattress store she worked in. Lyra thought that it was click so she went to the back room. There were dead fillies in there. Now Lyra and Bon-Bon are best friends and the owner of the mattress store was actually R. Kelly.

THE END

Gilda Meets Trixie

“Ooohh I’m Rainbow Dash, I have so many friends,” Gilda mocked.

“Ooohh I’m Twilight Sparkle I’m so magical,” Trixie mocked.

“Hey you hate those ponies too?” Gilda asked.

“No, I actually am in love with Twilight, but she’ll never love me,” Trixie admitted.

“I loved Rainbow Dash too, but we don’t need them now we can just love each other together,” Gilda said in a sympathetic voice.

“That’s funny you’re a griffin I can’t be seen with a Pegasus let alone a griffin!” Trixie laughed as she walked away.

“Why do I even try? How about you two?” Gilda asked

“He’s Flim.”

“He’s Flam.”

“And were the world famous Flim Flam brothers,” They both sung.

“So?” Gilda asked.

“Didn’t you hear us were world famous,” Flam said.

“Meaning we can’t be seen with a griffin either,” Flim said.

“Huh REALLY!” Gilda screamed.

“We will hang out with you,” one of the Diamond Dogs stated.

“Hahaha your dogs that’s even lower than a griffin,” Gilda laughed as she flew away.

THE END

Spike’s Adventure

Spike wanted to go on an adventure so he decided to collect cans. Once Spike got enough cans he threw them at old people.

THE END.

Twist Starts a Band

Twist wanted to start a band, but she has no friends anymore and no one likes her even her father. She asks Big Mac to join and he said: Eeyup. Big Mac thought that Twist is a nice girl, but after spending a minute with her Big Mac bucked her in the face.

Twist missed Applebloom and had an idea. Twist got a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser and got rid of her cutie mark. When she showed Applebloom and the other Cutie Mark Crusaders they just laughed even more at her. She went on to become pony president, so the bullies she had would regret what they did. Just kidding she killed herself.

THE END.

Rarity; a Story of Hope, Hard Word, and Fashion

Rarity tried to make a dress but forget how to stitch because she got in a fight with Nurse Red Heart, so she stabbed Rarity’s brain making her forget things. Rarity tried to get help from her friends, but they were all dead. When all hope seemed lost she found her father’s moustache and he taught her how to sew. Now she had a pretty dress for her date with Hoity Toity.

“Nice dress you whore,” Hoity complemented.

“I made it just for you,” Rarity explained.

“You are one creative retard,” Hoity flattered.

“Let’s get married,” Rarity pronounced.

“No.”

THE END

Rainbow Dash Gets a Very Special Somepony Part 3

“Ok it’s a girl,” Rainbow Dash admitted.

THE END.

Fluttershy Creates an Army

Fluttershy wanted to destroy all her enemies, so she made an army. She took the throne and murdered Celestia. She forgot about Luna though. Fluttershy was going to kill her, but she thought that it would be funnier to send her to the moon for another 1,000 years.

Fluttershy’s kingdom was great and prosperous. She had only one rule all must love her. She created an empire and destroyed all foreign lands.

Only one person could stop her, Cranky Doodle Donkey. Cranky fell asleep and everyone died in a nuclear war with the Changelings.

THE END.

How the Mane 6 Spent the Next Grand Galloping Gala

Spike wanted for them to all hang out together again, but no on listened again. Here is what they did at the next Grand Galloping Gala.

Twilight Sparkle

Twilight wanted to spend the night Celestia again. This time though Celestia and Twilight went to Celestia’s private chamber.

“Why don’t you take off your Gala dress to make it easier to do your magic?” Celestia commanded Twilight.

“Umm ok if you say so princess you do know everything there is to know about magic,” Twilight then takes off her dress.

“Now to have maximum magic power you have to bend over,” Celestia told Twilight.

“Ok….WAIT Molestia!” Twilight called out.

“Dang it so close!” Celestia who is now revealed to be Molestia said.

“There’s still no way out of here right?” Twilight asked.

“Of course I always have a plan B,” Molestia said.

“Let’s get this over with,” Twilight sighed.

THE END?

Pinkie Pie

Celestia (real one not Molestia) asked Pinkie to perform at the party to make it more lively this is what she came up with.

“Alright everypony are you ready to get DOOOOWNNN!” Pinkie yelled. “Lay me down a sick track Vinyl,” Pinkie asks Vinyl who then lays down a beat.

♫ Now everypony in Equestria my name’s Pinkie Pie ♫
♫ My rhymes so good they’ll just make you cry ♫
♫ Listen up here for a while ♫
♫ Mess with me and I’ll deal with you Pinkie Pie style ♫
♫ Whether you’re a Griffin, a Pony, or a Diamond Dog ♫
♫ I’ll be ending you like you’re an epilogue ♫
♫ I don’t wanna dis ♫
♫ But you’re on my list ♫
♫ Now I’m gonna ask if you’ll partake ♫
♫ In helping me make some cupcakes! ♫

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

THE END?

Applejack

“Apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples,” Applejack said.

“Can I have my pie now?” Soarin asked.

THE END?

Rainbow Dash

Written by: Coopbra my brother and Non-Brony

Rainbow Dash was discovering a cave, this was no ordinary cave because this cave was not only a cave, but it was a cave that led to another cave that was a beer cave inside of a Speedway. This is not the end of this tale as she was not even a virgin when writing about the sluggish Beaver from the kid’s TV program called “Franklin”. Thus she slipped on her own self-righteous doo doo monster!

“I’m a WIZARD!” Rainbow Dash Shouted.

THE END?

Rarity

Written by: Zebracakes10 my sister and new brony (pegasister)

All of Rarity’s life she could never find love maybe she will find somepony this year at the Gala, too bad she died of horrible left ankle cancer before she made it to the gala.

THE END?

Spike

When Spike arrived at the Gala he had some big plans. Spike was sad that Rarity died, but this gave him a chance to meet new fillies. He saw one that looked stunning his name was Fancy Pants. Yes Spike is gay. Spike approached Fancy Pants.

“Do you wanna rub my spikes,” Spike said seductively.

“Ponyville…you don’t say,” Fancy Pants replied.

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Spike said being confused.

“Ponyville…you don’t say,” Fancy Pants stated.

“Do you want to do it over there in the garden?” Spike asked.

“Ponyville…you don’t say,” Fancy Pants confirmed.

“Talk about biting off more than you can chew!” Spike exclaimed.

THE END?

Fluttershy

WARNING: CONTAINS GORE AND SEXUAL ACTIVITY THERE IS AN ALTERNATE STORY FOR FLUTTERSHY THOUGH IT DOESN’T FIT IN WITH THE FINAL PART.

After being abandoned last year by all of the animals Fluttershy had a new idea – hunting. Since guns are illegal in Equestria she had to steal guns from the Canterlot war archives. Doing this will be easy she will just have to seduce Shining Armor who is one of the holders of the key to the archive along with the royal family. Fluttershy walked over to Shining Armor who was guarding the gate of the gala.

“Hey big boy you wanna go have some fun in private,” Fluttershy said as seductively as she could.

“Ok but I gotta warn you I get pretty freaky in bed,” Shining Armor warned.

“That’s okay I can get pretty freaky too,” Fluttershy responded.

Fluttershy and Shining Armor walked off to Shining Armor’s bedroom in the castle. Fluttershy was surprised to see the room decorated in dead ponies and other creatures.

“Do you like my hobby, wait here a second I gotta get on my sex uniform,” Shining Armor told Fluttershy as he dashed off to the bathroom.

Though Fluttershy was scared at first the blood all over the room started to turn her on.

“You ready for a blood orgy?” Shining Armor asked. He was now wearing a pony skin suit that was covered in dry blood.

“Of course I am,” Fluttershy responded.

“We will need some fresh blood though. He ran off again to return with Cadence who was tied up. He then sliced her throat and allowed her blood to soak Fluttershy. He then took off her head took out the skull and brain and made Fluttershy wear it as a mask. After that he sliced her body open laying it out like a mat for them to have intercourse on.

Then they passionately started rolling around on Cadence’s severed body. Fluttershy never told anyone, but she was actually a virgin not counting the animals. This was such a great experience for her she just let Shining Armor do anything to her. During the middle of their making love they squeezed Cadence’s heart to add more blood.

Their sex was slow and very satisfactory after they were done Fluttershy completely forgot her original intentions. What Fluttershy didn’t know was that she was now pregnant with Shining Armor’s demon child.

THE END?

Alternate Fluttershy Story

Written by: Lykhon http://lykhon.deviantart.com/

Fluttershy arrived at the Gala. She looked around, saw all the Ponies laughing and having fun. This time she will make some new friends. She trotted into the garden and looked around.

"H-Hello?" she said shyly.

"Hello." She squeaked surprised and flew into a tree.

She looked down. A stallion with grey fur and blonde mane looked at her, softly smiling. His blue eyes looked into hers. She blushed and giggled as she flew down and landed next to him.

"Uhm... Hi... W-What are you doing here?” She asked him quietly.

He answered: "I saw a pretty cute Pegasus trotting here and I thought, before you never meet her again, you will talk to her" Fluttershy blushed more.

"My name is Cloud Seeker, but you can call me Cloud."

"H-Hello Cloud... uhm, my name is Fluttershy", she smiled at him.

She never thought she'd be able to talk to anypony here. But something in Cloud's eyes made her strong and outgoing. She wanted to know him better. She trotted a bit closer to him.

"That's a nice name. What are you doing here all alone?" He asked. She trotted a bit closer, softly answering.

"I was looking for some animals. I love animals, y'know."

"That's lovely!" He trotted closer as well and blushed slightly. She stopped in front of him. He stopped in front of her.

"You... you are a b-beautiful mare, Fluttershy...” he said, softly smiling and blushing more.She blushed as well.

"Th-Thank you cloud... Y-You are very h-handsome." She looked up at him. He looked down at her. They moved their heads slowly closer to each other. Fluttershy closed her eyes as their lips met.

THE END.

Rarity’s Father’s Moustache

It seems that the Gala this year has been very eventful, but one man’s stache truly had the best night ever! Rarity’s father fell asleep and it was now time for his moustache to escape. He hitched a ride on a carriage to the Gala.

The Carriage was going to slow so the stache took care of that. He started speeding the carriage as fast as it could go. He ended up hitting another carriage containing Rarity. Rarity got horrible whip lash and hit her ankle causing her ankle cancer to come back thus killing her before she made it to the Gala.

Also in the carriage was Rainbow Dash who got knocked out of the carriage and landed in a cave.

He made it to the ball room and decided to get the hottest chick in the room. She was Twilight Sparkle (because Rarity died.) Before he could make it to her she was taken to a room by Molestia. He tried to warn her that it was Molestia, but he was stepped on by Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie ran up on to the stage. She sung a horrible song and stache was mad at her for stepping on him, so when she was done he screamed BOOOOO!!

“Who said that?” Pinkie angrily asked. Stache pointed at Derpy. “Alright Derp come on we got some cupcakes to make,” Pinkie hysterically yelled.

“No I only like muffins!” Derpy screamed.

After that Stache was very hungry and he isn’t allowed to eat any h'orderves anymore. On his way towards Applejack’s stand he bumped into Spike who was having an interesting conversation with Fancy Pants. He walked up to Applejack’s stand.

“Apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples,” Applejack said.

Stache just stole some apples when she was on her apple spree. As he walked around outside he heard something very weird coming from Shining Armor’s room. Stache went to go investigate. What he saw can only be described as the hottest thing in the world with Fluttershy in it.

After seeing what the manes 6 were doing he decided that this party needed to be Stached. He grabbed lobsters, freebirds, Vermont, calories, monkey’s with two asses, Green Eggs and Ham books, and of course some Sweet Apple Acres Cider! In 10 seconds flat the party became out of control anarchy.

Rainbow Dash finally flew in, but killed when Soarin’ and Spitfire were having a flying race and both crashed directly into Dash. She died with the biggest wingboner ever.

Twilight came out of the chamber and angry ponies who wanted democracy killed Molestia and Twilight along with her.

Fluttershy then came in as her demon baby was born and started creating hell fire everywhere. Fluttershy died during child birth.

Applejack was burnt to death her last word being “Apples.”
Rarity then came in as a zombie and was jealous that her two loves Spike and Fancy Pants were now together so she murdered them both. Rarity then got right ankle cancer and died again.

Pinkie Pie came in with a chainsaw, knives, and guns. She got into an epic battle with Fluttershy’s demon baby. Pinkie Pie stabbed the baby in the heart, but the baby blew up on impact killing Pinkie Pie.

Rarity’s father’s moustache then saw all of the chaos that he created.

“With making all of Canterlot being covered in hell fire and having complete anarchy really did make this THE BEST NIGHT EVER!”

THE END!